'^H^t 


txhvary  of t:he  theological  ^tmimry 

PRINCETON    .    NEW  JERSEY 
PRESENTED  BY 

Dr.    Charles   G.    Osgood 

'See 


v-^  >9»H-' 


0! 


mm 


\ 


Account  of  the 

LIFE 

Of  the  late  Reverend 

Mr.  David  Bramerd, 

j  Miniftcr  of  the  Gofpel, 

i  Mifftonary  to  the  Indians,  from  the 
honourable  Society  in  Scotland ^^^r:^ 

\  f  the  Propagation  of  Chriftian  Know- 
ledge, and  Pallor  of  a  Church  of 
Chriftian  Indians  in  New-Jerfey. 

Who    died    at    Northampton  in   New-EnglanDj 
OSfoh.^th  1747.  ^"  ^^^  3^^^  Year  of  his  Age  : 

Chiefly  taken  from  his  own  Diary^  and  other  prirate 
Writings,  written   for  his  own  Ufe ;    and   now 

|i)ub]iflied. 


By  Jonathan  Edwards,  A.  M. 
I       Minilter  of  the  Gofpel  at  Northampton. 

'^^        B    O    ST    O    N :     N.  E. 

^  for  and  Sold  by  D,  Henchmam,  in  CofnhiK' 
'749-  % 


W. 


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sy^^  t(f"  >■«'%,• 


iP  ■>•?  i%(,:' 


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a\1»V 


^y 


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4 


m^  i 


r-- 


'he  PREFACE. 


THERE  are  two  Ways  of  rcprefentiflg^nd 
recommending  true  Religion  and  Virtue  to 
the  World,  which  God  hath  made  Ufe  of: 
The  one  is  by  Doflrine  and  Precept ;  the 
other  is  by  Inftance  and  Example  :  Both  are  abundantly 
ufed  in  the  holy  Scriptures,  Not  only  are  the  Grounds, 
Nature,  Defign  and  Importance  of  Religion  clearly  ex- 
hibited in  the  Dodrines  of  Scripture,  and  it's  Exercife 
rndPradlice  plainly  delineated  and  abundantly  cnjoin'd 
and  enforc'd  in  it's  Commands  and  Counfcls  :  But  there 

?we  have  many  excellent  Examples  of  Religion,  in  it's 
Power  and  Pradice,  fet  before  us,  in  the  Hiftories  both 
of  the  Old  Teftament  and  New.  —  Jesus  Christ^ 
the  great  Prophet  of  God,  when  he  came  into  the  World 
to  be  the  Light  of  the  IVorld^  to,  teach  and  enforce  true 
Religion,  in  a  greaterDegrce  than  ever  had  been  before, 
he  made  Ufe  of  both  thefe  Methods  :  In  his  Dodrine 
he  declared  the  Mind  and  Will  of  God,  and  theNiiture 
and  Properties  of  that  Vertue  which  becomes  Creatures 
of  ourMake  and  in  our  Circumftances,  more  cle^lrly  and 
fully  than  ever  it  had  been  bcfore,and  more  powerfully 
enforced  it  by  what  he  declared  of  the  Obligations  and 
Inducements  to  Holinefs  ;  and  he  alfo  in  his  own  Prac- 
tice gave  a  mod  pcrfc6l  Example  of  the  Vertue  he 
I  taught.  He  exhibited  to  the  World  fuch  an  illuftrious 
g^'^attern  of  Hunriility,  divine  Love,  difcreet  Zeal,  Self*- 
Ijenjala  Obcd/enee,  Patience,  Rcfignation,  Fortitude, 
/    '  A  z  Mcckacfs, 


11 


*rbe  PREF ACE. 


Meeknefs,  Forgivenefs,  Companion,  Benevolence,  and 
univerfal  Holinefs,  as  neither  Men  nor  Angels  ever  faw 
before.     God  alfo  in  his  Providence   has  been  wont  to 
make  Ufe  of  both  thefe  Methods  to  hold  forth  Light  to 
Mankind,  and  Inducement  to  their  Duty,   in  all  Ages ; 
He  has  fromTime  toTime  raifed  up  eminent  Teachers, 
to  exhibit  and  bear.  Tcftimony  to  the  Truth   in  their 
VoffrmCy  and  oppofe  the  Errors,  D^rknefs  andWickcd- 
nels  of  the  World  ;  and    alfo  has,    from  Age  to  Age, 
raifed  up  feme  eminent  Perfons  that  havefet  bright  Ex- 
amples of  that  Religion  that  is  taught  and  prefcribed  in 
the^Pord  of  God  ;  whofc   Examples  have    in   divine 
Providence  been  fet  forth  to  publickView.     Thefe  have  \ 
a  great  Tendency   to  engage   the  Attention  of  Men  to  \ 
the  Dodlrines  and  Rules  that  are  taught,  and  greatly  to^ 
confirm  and  enforce  them  ;  and  efpecially  when  thefe  \\ 
bright  Examples  have   been  exhibited   in  the  fame  Per-  \ 
fons  that  have  been  eminent  Teacben,  fo  that  the  World  ^ 
has  had  Opportunity  to  fee  fuch  a  Confirmation  of  the 
Truth, Efficacy,  andAmiablenefsof  the  Religion  taught^ 
in  the  PraQike  of  the    fame  Perfons   that   have   moft 
clearly  and  forceabiy  taught  it;  and  above  all,  when  \ 
ihefc  bright  Examples  have  been  fet  by  eminentTeach-  } 
crs  in  a  variety  of  unufual  Circum (lances  of  remarkable 
Trial ;  and  God  has  withal   remarkably  diftinguifh'd 
them  with  v/onderful  Succefi  of  their   Inflrudiions    and 
Labours,  confiiling  in  glorious  Events   that  have  been 
in  many  Refpe<5ls  new  and  ftrange.  , 

Such  sn  Inftance  we  have  in  the  e^ccellefitPerfin^whofc 
Life  is  publiHied  in  the  foIlowingPages.  HisExampIe 
is  attended  with  a  great  Variety  of  Circumftances, tend- 
ing Co  engage  the  Attention  of  religious  People,  efpeci- 
ally in  thefe  Parts  of  the  World  ;  He  was  one  of  dif- 
cinguidiM  natural  Abilities  i  as  all  are  fenfible,  that  had 
Acquaintance  with  him  :  He  was  a  Minifter  of  the 
Golpei,  and  one  who  was  called  to  unufual  Services  'm\ 
ihli  Workj  whofc  M'niftry  was  attended  with   very  re-' 


^he  PREF  AC  E^ 


iii 


markable  and  unufual  Events,  an  Account  of  which 
has  already  been  given  to  thePublick  ;  one  whofeCourfe 
of  Religion  began  before  the  lateTimes  of  extraordinary 
religious  Commotion,  but  yet  one  that  lived  in  thofc 
Times,  and  went  through  them,  and  was  very  much  in 
the  Way  of  t^e  various  extraordinary  Effeds  and  unuiial 
Appearances  of  that  Day,  and  was  not  an  idleSpedlator, 
bat  had  a  near  Concern  in  many  Things  that  pafs'd  at 
that  Time  j  one  that  had  a  very  extenfiveAcquaintance 
with  thofe  that  have  been  the  Subjcdls  of  the  late  reli- 
gious Operations,  in  many  of  thefe  Britifh  Colonies^  in 
Places  far  diftanc  one  from  another,  in  People  df  many 
different  Nations,  of  difFerewt  Educations,  Manners  and 
'"uftoms  ;  one  who  had  peculiar  Opportunity  of  Ac- 
uaintance  with  iht  falfe  Appearances  and  Counterfeits 
f  Religion  :  One  who  himfeif  was  the  Inftrument  of  a 
lofl  remarkableAwakening,  and  an  exceeding  wonder- 
\  \\  and  abiding  Alteration  and  moral  Transformation  of 
\  ich  Subjcdls  as  do  peculiarly  render  the  Change  rare  and 
i^onifhing. 

i  In  the  following  Account,  the  Reader  will  have  Op- 
ij  ortunity  to  fee,  not  only  what  v/ere  the  external  Cir- 
i  jmftances  and  remarkable  Incidents  of  the  Life  of  this 
/||  'erfon,  and  how  he  fpent  his  Time  from  Day  to  Day, 
%  s  to  his  external  Behaviour  ;  butalfo  what  pafs'd  in  his 
/jwn  Heart,  the  wonderful  Change  that  he  experienced 
in  his  Mind  and  Difpofition,  the  Manner  in  which  that 
Change  was  bro't  to  pafs,  how  it  continued,  what  were 
it's  Confcquenccs  in  his  inward  Frames,  Thoughts,  Af- 
feflions  and  fecret  Exercifes,  through  many  Yiciffitudes 
and  Trials,  from  thenceforth  for  more  than  eightYears, 
'till  his  Death  -,  and  alfo  to  fee  how  all  ended  at  lad,  in 
his  Sentiments,    Frame   and  Behaviour,  during  a  long 
Seafon  of  the  gradual  and  fenfible  Approach  of  Death, 
under,  a  lingringlllnefs,  and  what  were  the  Effeifls  of 
his  Religion    in    dying   Circumftances,   or    in  the  laft 
Siages  of  his  dying  Illncfs.     The  Accoynt  being  writ- 
ten, 


w  ne  preface: 

ten,  the  Reader  may  have  Opportunity  at  hisLeifure  te 
compare  the  various  Parts  of  the  Story,  and  deliberately 
to  view  and  weigh  the  whole,  and  confider  how  far 
what  \s  related  is  agreeable  to  the  Didates  of  right  Rea- 
fon  and  the  holy  Word  of  God. 

1  am  far  from  fuppofing,  that  Mr.  Brainerd'%  inward 
Exercifes  andExpericnces,  or  his  external  Condudl,  were 
free  from  all  Imperfection  :  ThcExample  of  Je/usCbrifi 
is  the  only  Example  that  ever  was  fet  in  the  human 
Nature,  that  was  altogether  perfect  ;  which  therefore  is 
a  Rule,  to  try  all  other  Examples  by  ;  and  the  Difpofi- 
tionSjFramcs,  andPraflices  of  others  muft  be  commend- 
ed and  followed  no  further,  than  they  were  Followers 
of  CbriJ^. 

There  is  one  Thing  in  Mr.  Brainerd^^aCily  difcerna- 
ble  by  the  following  Account  of  his  Life,  that  may  be 
called  an  Imperfeflion  in  him,  which  tho'  not  properly 
an  Imperfedion  of  a  moral  Nature,  yet  may  poffibly  be 
made  anObjedion  againlt  the  extraordinaryAppcarances 
of  Religion  and  Devotion  in  him,  by  fuch  as  feek  for 
Objedions  againft  every  Thing  that  can  be  produced 
ia  Favour  of  true  vital  Religion  ;  and  that  is,  that  he 
was  one  who  by  his  Conflitucion  and  natural  Tempet 
was  fo  prone  to  Melancholy  and  Dejcdion  of  Spirit. 
There  are  fome  who  think  that  all  ferious  ftridReligion 
is  a  melancholy  Thing,  apd  that  what  is  calledChriftian 
Experience,  is  little  dP^befides  melancholy  Vapours 
difturbing  the  Brdin,  'IPS  exciting  enthufiaftical  Imagi- 
nations. But  that  M(i  Brainerd's  Temper  or  Confti- 
tution  inclined  him  toiDefpondency,  is  no  juft  Ground 
lo  fufpedl  his  extraordinary  Devotion,  as  being  only  the 
Fruit  of  a  warm  Imagination.  I  doubt  not  but  that  all 
who  have  well obfervedMankind,  will  readily  grant  this, 
that  it  is  not  all  thofe  who  by  their  natyral  Conftitution 
or  Temper  are  moft  difpofed  to  Deje^ion^  that  arc  the 
Perfons  who  are  the  mod  fufceptive  of  lively  and  ftronf 
ImprcfTions  on  their  Imagination,  or  the  moftfubj-d/ 


the  PREFACE.  '-  y 

thofe  vehement  impetuous  AfFeflions,  which  are  the 
Fruits  of  fuch  Impreffions ;  but  that  many  who  are  of  a 
■y ay  gay  and /i«^a/»^naturalTcraper  are  vaftly  more  fo, 
and  if  their  Affcdions  are  turned  into  a  religious  Chan- 
nel, are  much  more  cxpofed  to  Enihuftafm^  than  many 
of  the  former.  And  as  to  Mr.  Brainerd  in  particular, 
notwichftanding  his  Inclination  toDefpondency,  he  was 
ipvidcntly  one  of  that  Sort  of  Perfons  who  ufually  are  the 
Furtheft  from  a  teeming  Imagination  ;  being  one  of  a 
penetrating  Genius,  of  clear  Thought,  of  clofe  Reafon- 
ing,  and  a  very  cxadl Judgment ;  as  all  know,  that  knew 
him.  As  he  had  a  great  Infight  into  human  Nature, 
and  was  very  d'tfcerning  and  judicious  in  Things  in  ge- 
neral, fo  he  excell'd  in  his  Judgment  and  Knowledge  of 
things  inDivinity.but  efpecially  inThings  appertaining 
to  inward  cxperimentalReligion  ;  mod  accurately  diftin- 
guifhing  between  real  folid  Piety  and  Enthufiafm,  be- 
tween thofe  AfFcdtions  that  are  rational  and  fcriptural, 
having  their  Foundation  in  Light  and  Judgment,  and 
thofe  that  are  founded  in  whimfical  Conceits,  (trong 
Impreffions  on  the  Imagination,  and  thofe  vehement 
Emotions  of  the  animal  Spirits  that  arife  from  them. 
He  was  exceeding  fenfible  of  Men'sExpofednefs  to  thefc 
Things,  how  much  they  had  prevailed,  and  what  Mul- 
titudes had  been,  deceived  by  them,  of  the  perniciouj 
Confequenccs  of  them,  and  the  fearfulMifchief  they  had 
done  in  the  Chriftian  World.  He  greatly  abhor'd  fuch 
a  Sort  of  Religion,  and  was  abundant.ijj  bearing  Tefti- 
mony  againft  it,  living  and  dyin^vir^cl  was  quick  to 
difcern  when  any  Thing  of  that 'Nature  arofe,  tho'  i« 
it's,  firft  Buddings,  and  appearfng  under  the  moft  fair 
and  plaufible  Difguifes  ;  and  had  that  Talent  at  defcrib- 
ing  the  various  Workings  of  i\\\^  imaginary  Entbu^ 
fiafical  Religion,  evincing  the  Falfenefs  and  -Vanity  of 
it,  and  dcmonftrating  the  great  Difference  between  this 
and  true  fpir it ual  Devotion,,  which  1  fcarcely  ever  knew 
equalled  in  any  Other  Perfon.  rrr:  And  hisjudicioufnefs 

did 


vi  ne   PREFACE. 

did  not  only  appear  in  diftinguifhing  among  the  Expe- 
riences of  others^  but  alfo  among  the  various  ExercifeS 
of  bis  own  Mind  ;  and  particularly  in  difccrning  what 
^vithin  himfelf  was  to  be  laid  to  the  Score  o{ Melancholy *y 
in  which  he  exceeded  all  melancholy  Perfons  that  ever 
I  was  acquainted  with  (tho'Ihave  been  in  the  Way  of 
Acquaintance  with  very  many  ;  )  which  was  doubtlcls 
owing  to  a  peculiar  Strength  in  his  Judgment :  "Tis  a 
rare  Thing  indeed,  that  melancholy  People  arc  well  fen- 
fible  of  their  own  Difeafe,  and  fully  convinced  that  fuch 
and  fuch  Things  are   to  be  afcribed  to  it,  as  are  indeed 

it's  genuine  Operations  and  Fruits. Mr.  Braineri 

did  not  obtain  that  Degree  of  Skill,  which  he  had  in 
this  Matter,  at  once,  but  gain*d  it  gradually  ;  as  the 
Reader  may  difcern  by  the  following  Account  of  his 
Life.  In  the  former  Part  of  his  religious  Courfe,  he 
imputed  much  of  that  Kind  ofGloomincfs  of  Mind  and 
thofe  dark  Thoughts^  to  fpiritual  Befertion^  which  in 
the  latter  Part  o*  bis  Life,  he  was  abundantly  fcnfible, 
were  owing  to  the  Difeafe  of  Melancholy  -,  accordingly 
he  often  exprcfly  fpeaks  of  them  in  his  Diary  as  arifing 
fromthisCaufe  ;  and  he  was  often  inConverfation  fpeak- 
ing  of  the  Difference  between  Melancholy  and  godly 
Sorrow,  true  Humiliation  and  fpiritual  Defertion,  and 
the  great  Danger  of  miflaking  the  one  for  the  other, 
and  the  very  hurtful  Nature  of  Melancholy,  difcourfing 
•with  great  Judgment  upon  it,  and  doubtlefs  much  more 
judicioufly  for  what  he  knew  by  his  own  Experience. 
But  bcfides  what  maybe  argued  from  Mr  Brninerd's 
Strength  of  Judgment,  'tis  apparent  in  F^ff,  that  he 
was  not  a  Perfon  cA  a  warm  Imagination.  His  inward 
Experiences,  either  'n  hisConvidlions  or  his  Converfion, 
and  his  religious  Views  and  Impreffions  thro'  the  Courfe 
cf  his  Life  to  his  Death  C  of  which  he  has  left  a  very 
particular  Account  )  none  of  them  confided  in,  or  were- 
excited  by,(lrong  and  lively  Imag«s  formed  in  his  Ima- 
gination j  there  is  nothing  a^  a|i  appears  of  it  in  h^ 

Dioff^ 


ns  preface:  vh 

Ibtary^  From  Beginning  to  End  :  Yea,  he  told  me  on 
hisDcath-Bed,  that,  altho'  once  when  he  wasvery  young 
in  Years  and  in  Experiencejhe  was  deceived  into  a  high 
Opinion  of  fuch  Things,  Jooking  on  them  as  fupcriour 
Attainments  in  Religion,  beyond  what  he  had  ever 
arrived  to,  and  was  ambitious  of  them  and  earncflly 
fought  them,  yet  he  never  could  obtain  them  5  and  that 
he  never  in  his  Life  had  a  ftrong  ImprefTicn  on  his  Ima- 
ginaciottj  of  any  V.fdge,  outward  Form,  external  Gioryj 
or  any  other  Thing  of  that  Nature  ;  which  Kind  of 
ImprtlTions  abound  among  the  wild  enthufiaftic  Peo- 
ple of  the  lace  and  prefent  Day, 

As  Mr.  Brainerd's  Religious  Imprefliong,  Views  and 
AfFedions  in  theii  Nature  were  vaftly  different  fromEn- 
thufialrn^  fo  were  tht-ir  Effe5f5  in  him  as  contrary  aS 
poffible  to  the  ordinary  Effcds  of  that.  Nothing  ^0 
puffs  Men  up,  as  Enthufiajmy  with  a  high  Conceit  of 
their  own  Wifdom,  Holmefs,  Eminency  and  Sufficien- 
cy, and  makes  'em  fo  bold^  forward,  affuming,  and 
arrogant  :  But  the  Reader  will  fee,  that  Mr.  Brainerd's 
Religion  conftantly  difpofed  him  to  a  moft  meanTho't 
of  himfelf,  an  abaling  Senfe  of  his  own  exceeding  Sin- 
fulnefs,  Dtrficiency,  Unprofitablenefs,  and  Ignorance  5 
looking  on  himfeif  as  v/orfe  than  others  ;  difpofing  him 
to  univerfal  Benevolence,  Meeknefs,  and  in  Honour  to 
prefer  others,  and  to  treat  all  with  Kindnefs  andRefped. 
And  when  Melancholy  prevailed,  tho'  the  Effeds  of  it 
were  very  prejudicial  to  him,yet  it  had  not  thofeEffeds  of 
Enibujiafm  ;  but  operated  by  dark  and  difcouraging 
Thoughts  of  himfelf,  as  ignorant^  wicked  and  wholly 
unfit  for  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry^  or  even  to  be  fecn 
among  Mankind,  &c,  Indeed  at  the  Time  fore- 
mentioned,  when  he  had  not  learn'd  well  to  difiinguilb. 
betweenEnthufiafm  &rolidReligion,he  joining  and  keep- 
ing Company  with  fome  that  were  tinged  with  no  fmall 
Degree  of  the  former,  for  a  Seafon  partook  with  them 
in  a  Degree  of  their  Difpofitions  and  Behaviours ;  tho* 
as  Nvas  obferved  before,  he  could  not  obtain  ihokThingt 

a  a  wherein 


viii  ne  PREF ace: 

wherein  their  Enthufiafm  it  fcif  confided,  and  fo  could 
not  become  like 'em  in  that  Refped,  however  he  er- 
roneoudy  defir^d  and  fought  it.  But  certainly  it  is  not 
at  all  to  be  wondered  at,  that  a  Youth  and  a  young 
Convert,  cne  that  had  his  Heart  fo  Ivvallowed  up  inRc 
Jigion,  and  fo  carneftly  dePifcd  the  flourifliing  of  it,  buc 
had  had  fo  little  Opportunity  for  Reading;  ,Obfervation 
and  Experience,  fhould  for  a  while  be  dazzled  and  de- 
ceived with  the  glaring  Appearances  of  that  miftaken 
Devotion  and  Zeal  ;  efpecially  confidering  what  the 
extraordinary  Circumftances  of  that  Day  were.  He  told 
me  on  his  Dcath-Bcd,  that  while  he  was  in  thefe  Cir- 
cumftances  he  was  out  of  his  Element,  and  didViolcncc 
to  himfelf,  while  complying,  in  his  Condu6l,  withPer- 
fons  of  a  fierce  and  imprudent  Zeal,  from  his  great 
Veneration  of  fome  that  he  looked  upon  much  better 
than  himfelf.  So  that  it  would  be  very  unreafonable,that 
his  Error  at  that  Time  fhould  neverthelefs  be  efteemed 
a  juft  Ground  of  Prejudice  againft  the  whole  of  his  Re- 
ligion, and  his  Charafler  in  general  ;  efpecially  confi- 
dering, how  greatly  his  Mind  was  foon  changed,  and 
how  exceedingly  he  afterwards  lamented  his  Error,  and 
abhor*d  himfelf  for  his  imprudentZealandMifcondudl  at 
that  Time,  even  to  the  breaking  of  his  Heart,  and  al- 
moft  to  the  overbearing  and  breaking  theSrrength  of  his 
Nature  ;  and  how  much  of  a  Chriftian  Spirit  he  (hew- 
ed, in  his  condemning  himfelf  for  that  Milcondudl,  as 
the  Reader  will  fee. 

What  has  been  now  mentioned  of  Mr.  Brainerd.h  fo 
far  from  being  juft  Ground  of  Prejudice  againft  what  is 
related  in  the  following  Account  of  his  Life,  that,  if 
duly  confidcrcd,  it  will  render  the  Hiftory  the  more 
Ssrvieeahle,  For  by  his  thus  joining  for  a  Seafon  with 
Enibiijiaffj^he  had  a  more  full  &  intimateAcquaintance 
with  what  belonged  to  thatSort  of  Religion,  and  fo  was 
under  better  Advantages  to  judge  of  the  Difference  be- 
tween that,and  the  other,  which  he  finally  approved  and 
ftrovc  to  his  utmoft    to  promote,    in  Oppofition  to  it  : 

And 


The  PREFACE,  jx 

And  hereby  the  Reader  has  the  more  to  demonftrate  to 
him,  that  Mr.  Brainerd  in  his  Tedimony  againft  it  and 
the  Sp.rJc  and  Behaviour  of  thofe  that  are  influenced  by 
it,  fpeaks  from  impartial  Ccnviclion,  and  not  from  Pre- 
judice ;  bccaufe  therein  he  openly  condemns  his  own  for- 
mer Opinion  and  Condu6l,  on  Account  of  which 
h  *  had  greatly  fuffered  from  hisOppofers,and  for  v^fiich 
fome  continued  to  Reproach  him  as  long  as  he  hved. 

Another  Imperfection  in  Mr.  Braindpa^vjhKh  maybe 
obferved  in  the  following  Account  of  his  Life,  was  his 
being  excejjive  in  his  Labours  ;  not  taking  due  Care  to 
Proportion  his  Fatigues  to  his  Strength  Indeed  the 
Cafe  was  very  often  To,  and  fuch  the  feeming  Calls  of 
Providence,  that  it  was  extremely  difficult  for  him  to 
avoid  doing  more  than  his  Strength  would  well  admit 
of;  yea,  his  Circumftances,  and  the  Bufintfs  of  his 
Miflion  among  the  Indians^  were  fuch,  that  great  Fa- 
tigues and  Hardfhips  were  altogether  inevitable.  How- 
ever, he  was  finally  convinced,  that  he  had  err'd  in  this 
Matter,  and  that  he  ought  to  have  takf^n  more  thoro* 
Care,  and  been  more  refolute  to  withftand  Temptations 
to  fuch  Degrees  of  Labour  as  injurM  his  Health  ;  and 
accordingly  warned  his  Brother^  who  fucceeds  him  in 
his  MifTion,  to  be  careful  to  avoid  this  Error. 

Befides  thelmperfedlions  already  mentioned,  it  Is  rea- 
dily allowed,  that  there  were  fome  Imperfedions  that 
ran  through  his  whole  Life,  and  were  mixed  with  all 
his  religious  Affedions  and  Exercifes,  fome  Mixture  of 
what  was  natural  with  that  which  was  fpiritual  •,  as  it 
evermore  is  in  the  befl  Saints  in  this  World.  Doubtlefs 
there  was  fome  Influence  that  natural  Temper  had  in  the 
religious  Exercifes  and  Experiences  of  Mr.  Brainerd^^^ 
there  molt  apparently  was  in  the  Exercifes  of  devout 
T>avid,  and  the  Apoflles  Peter,  John  and  Paul :  There 
was  undoubtedly  very  often  fome  influence  of  his  natural 
Difpofition  to  Dejection  in  his  religious  Mourning,fome 
Mixture  of  Melancholy  with  truly  godly  Sorrow  arid  real 
Chriftian  Humility,   and  fome  Mixture  ok  the  natural 

a  a  2  FiU 


X  ne  P  REFACE. 

Fire  of  Youth  with  his  holy  Zeal  for  God,   and  fome 
Influence  of  natural  Principles  mix'd  with  Grace  in  va- 
rious other  Refpedls,  as  it  ever  was  and  evrr  wili  be  with 
the  Saints   while  on  this  Side   Heaven.     Pei  haps  none 
were  more  fenfibic  of  Mr.  Brainerd's  Imperftdlions  ihaa 
hehimfelf;  or  could  diftinguifh  more  a^curattiy,   tl*  .n 
he,   between  what  was  natural   and  what   was    Ipintual, 
*Tis  eafy  for  the  judicious  Reader  to  oblerve,    that  his 
Graces  ripen'd,  and  the  religious  Exercifes  of  his  H^art 
became  more  and  more  pure,  and   he   more  and  more 
diftinguifhing    in   his  Judgment,    the  longer  he  Jiv'd : 
He  had  much  to  teach  and  purify  him,and  he  failed  not 
£0  make  his  Advantage  thereby. 

Butnotwithftanding  all  thefe  Imperfeftions,  lam  per- 
fwaded,  every  pious  and  judicious  Reader  will  acknow- 
ledge, that  what  is  here  fet  before  him  is  indeed  a  re- 
markable Inftance  of  true  and  eminent  Chriftian  Piety  in 
Heart  and Praflice  -,  tendinggreatly  to  confirm  theReali- 
ty  of  vital  Religion  and  the  Power  of  Godlinefs,  mod 
worthy  or  Imitation,  and  many  Ways  tending  to  the 
fpiritual  Benefit  of  the  careful  Obferver. 

Tis  fie,  the  Reader  fliould  be  aware,  that  what  Mr. 
Brainerd  wrote  in  his  Diary,  out  of  which  the  following 
Account  of  his  Life  is  chiefly   taken,  was  written  only 
for  his  own  private  Ufe,  and  not   to    get  Honour  and 
Applaufe  in  the  World,   nor  with  any  Defign  that  the 
World  fliould  ever  fee  it,  either  while  h^e  lived  or  after 
his  Death,  excepting  fome  few  Things  that  he  wrote  in 
a  dying  State,  after  he  had  been  perfwaded  fwith  Diffi- 
culty) not  entirely  to  fcpprefs  all  his  private  Writings. 
He  fliewed  himfelf  almolt  invincibly  averfe  to  the  Pub' 
lijhing  of  any  Part  of  \mDiary  after  hisDeath  ;  and  when 
he  was  thought  to  be   dying  at  Bojiony    gave  the  moft 
flridt  peremptory  Orders  to  theContrary  :  but  being  by 
fome  of   his  Friends  there  prevailed  upon  to  v/ithdraw 
foftridand  abfolute  a  Prohibition,hc  was  pleafed  finally 
to  yield  fo  far  as  that  hisPapers  /hould  be  left  in  myHands^ 
ihat  I  might  difpofi  of  them  as  libougbt  "Jijould  he  violifsr 


the  preface;  ^ 

God^s  Glory  and  tbs  Inter efi  of  Religion '"l^\^t  afewDays 
before  his  Death,  he  ordered  fomc  Part  of  his  Diary  to 
be  defl:royed(as  will  afterwards  be  obferved;  which  ren- 
ders the  Account  of  hrLife  the  lefs  compleat.  And  there 
are  fome  Parts  of  \i\iDiary  are  here  left  out  for  Brevity's 
Sake,  that  would  ( I  am  fenfible)  have  been  a  great  Ad- 
vantage to  the  Hiftory,  if  they  had  been  inferted  ;  par^ 
cicularly  the  Account  of  his  wonderful  Succeffcs  among 
the  Indians  \  which  for  Subftance  is  the  fame  in  his  pri- 
vate Diary  with  that  which  has  already  been  made  pub- 
lick,  m  the  Journal  he  kept  by  order  of  the  Society  in 
Scotland^  for  their  Information.  That  Account,  I  am  of 
Opmion,would  be  morcentcrtaining  and  more  profitable, 
if  it  were  publifhed  as  it  is  written  in  his  Diaryy  in  Con- 
nection with  his  fecret  Religion  and  the  inwardExercifes 
of  his  Mind,  and  alfo  with  the  preceeding  and  following 
Parts  of  the  Story  of  his  Life.  But  becaufe  thatAccount 
has  been  Publifhed  already,  and  becaufe  the  adding  it 
here  would  make  the  Book  much  more  bulky  and  more 
co{lly,which  might  tend  to  difcourage  the  Purchafe  and 
Perufal  of  it,  and  fo  render  it  lefs  extenfively  ufeful,  I  have 
therefore  omitted  that  Part.  However,  this  Defeft  may 
in  a  great  Meafure  be  made  up  to  the  Reader,  by  his 
purchafing  his  publickJ^wr^^Aand  reading  it  in  its  Place, 
with  this  Hiftory  of  his  Life  ;  which  undoubtedly  would 
ts  well  worth  the  while  for  every  Reader,  and  would 
richly  recompenfe  the  additional  coft  of  the  Purchafe.  I 
hope  therefore,  that  thofe  of  my  Readers  who  are  aoc 
furnilhcd  with  that  Book,  will,  for  their  own  Profit  and 
Entertainment,  and  that  they  may  have  the  Story  of  this 
excellent  Perfon  more  compleat,  procure  one  of  thofe 
Books  ;  v/ithout  which  he  muft  h^ve  a  very  impcrfcdt 
View  of  the  moft  important  Part  of  his  Life,  and  (  on 
fomc  Accounts^  of  the  moft  remarkable  and  wonderful 
Things  in  it.—  I  ftiould  alfo  obferve,  that  bcfides  that 
^ook,  and  antecedent  to  it,  there  is  a  Narrative  relating 
Hjto  the  IndianA&dirs^  annexed  to  Mr. Pemkrton^s  Sermon 
'if  Mr.  Brainerd's  Ordination  j  which  lijcewife  may  the 

mom 


ja^  rhs  P  REF  ACE. 

more  profitably  be  read  in  Conjunftion  with  his  Diar^ 
previous  to  Nov.  5.  j  744. 

But  M  is  Time  to  end  this  Preface,  that  the  Reader 
Oiay  be  no  longer  detained  from  the  Hiftory  it  fcif. 

JV.  B.  Thofe  Parts  of  the  following  Hiftory,  that  are 
included  between  Brackets  thus  [  J  are  the 
Words  of  the  Publt/her^ot  the  moft  Part,  fumma- 
lily  reprefenting  (  for  Brevity's  Sakf)  the  fubftance 
or  chief  Things  contained  in  Mr.  5r^m<?r^'s  Diary, 
for  fuch  a  certain  Space  of  Time  as  is  there  fpeci- 
ficd  ;  The  reft  is  the  Account  that  he  givrs  of  him- 
fclf  in  his  private  Writings,  m  his  own  Words. 

I  prefuroe,  fcarce  any  Reader  needs  to  be  told,  that 
[  A.  Mt,  ]  on  the  top  of  the  Page,  fignifies  ^he 
Tear  of  his  Age,  and  [  A.  D.  ]  The  Tear  of  our 
Lord. 


SS2§2SISllglSISIBISIBIl^SS!§2SS§S§SSSS§g§ 


Bcfides  the  Errata  at  the  End  of  the  Life,  the  Reader  is  defir'4 
to  correal  the  following. 

Page  69. 1.  36.  r.  cries,  p.  77.  I.  35.  r.  wring  out.  p.  122. 1.  31. 
r.  have  more.  p.  124.  J.  24,  25.  r.  and  often  feel.  p.  j2^« 
1.  12.  r.  BlefTed  be  God.  p.  154.  1.  16.  r.  Nfjhaminy,  ^ 
I'j'j,  1.  22.  r.  any  Spirit,  p.  311.  J»  14.  r.  (o  aiCft.  p.  31^4 
1.  29.  r.  taken  iiom. 


^m^m^^^mwMmmm^mmm^^w 


The  Names  of  Subfcribers  to 
the  Rev.  Mr.  Brainerd\  Life. 

Province  of  the  Mafiachufetts-Bay. 

His  Excellency    Jonathan   Belcher,   Efq;  late 
Governour  of  the  MaJfacbuJettSy  now  Govcrnour 

ef  New  Jerjey, 

The  Hon.  Sir  William  Pepperrell,  Baronet, 


^ 


TjOn.  JohnAlford, 
P  Efq; 

DanielAppletonjEfq; 
Rev.  Nath.  Appkton 
Rev.  Hull  Abbot 
Rev.  Jofeph  Afhltcy 
JoA'pb  Appleton 
Samuel  Adams,  A.M. 
Capt.  WiJljam  Ayres 
Capt.  Jacob  Abbot 
Aaron  Auftin 
Elifha  Allis 
Jofeph  AlJcn 
i)amue]  Adams 
Samuel  Adams,  jun, 
David  Adams 
John  Applen 
Capf.  Noah  Afhley 
Richard  At  well 
Mary  Auftin 
Samuel  Allen 
John  Adams 
Peter  Adams 
IfracI  Afliley 
John  Afhky 
Benjamin  Auftin 
Sarah  Allen 


B 

HOn.  Tho.  Berry 
Efq; 
Hon.  Sylv.BournEfq; 
Rev.  John  Barnard 
Andrew  Burley,  Efq; 
Rev.  Daniel  Blifs 
Rev.  Thomas  Balch 
Rev.SiroonBraoltreet 
Edward  Bromfield 
John  Barret 
Jeremiah  Belknap 
Jofeph  Be'knap 
Jer.  Belknap  jun, 
Thomas  Baxter 
Mary  Bennet 
Thomas  Bromfield 
Ep^^anm  Brown 
John  Beatton 
John  Barnard 
Jonathan  Burt 
Fellows  Billings  , 
B-cuben  Belding 
Jofeph  Billings 
Jofeph  Bacon 
Preferved  Bartlet 
Jofeph  Baldwin 
Eikanah  Burt 


Samuel  Brett 
Capt.  —  Brown 
Samuel  Bancroft  jURa 
Abigail  Beck 
Mofes  Bradftreet 
Spencer  Bennet 
William  Browajun* 
Samuel  Bifs 
John  Billentine 
Cotton  Bradbury 
Jofeph  BragdonjuE., 
Tabuha  bragdoa 
Samuel  Sragdon 
Jeremiah  Hragdon 
Mary  Bulman 
Ifrael  Butler 
Jofeph  Bifiiop 
Jofeph  ijiickiin 
William  Brown  ". 
Jacob  Hurgis  r.  \-"  ,' 
Jacob  Barney  ;  ^ 

Edward  Hiake 
GrinHU  Blake 
James  Brigs 
WilliamBrettur 
John  Brigs 
Jarass  Bfftl;a  ,_^  . 


Suhfcrikrs  NamiSl 


John  Chamberlain 
Capt.  Mofes  Cunifs 
John  Clement 
Kicazer  Clark 
Ll  (ha  Cook 
Nuah  Cook,  juHi 
David  Llark 
Charles  CJap 
bclah  Clark 
Iihamar  Clark 
Eliphalct  Clap 
J  fuh  Llark,  jun. 
Mofes  Clark 
Daniel  Clark 
Aaron  Cock 
Jofiaii  V  hauncey 


H' 


Benjamin  Blaney 
David  Blood 
William  Bartlet 
John  Bulkley 
Jolhua  Barton 
Robert  Blake 
Samuel  Blifs 
tjtcphen  Bidger 
Berjamin  Belknap 
Samuel  Baicumb 
David  B^air 
Daniel  Bucknam 
Noah  Brooks 
Jonathan  Biker 
JonaihanBakcr 
C 

HOn.JuhnChand-  •  apt.  JonathanCIark  C  hriftopher  Dyer 
Icr,  Efq;  Eliakim  Clark  Wililam  Dunning 

Hon.Ez.ChecvcrEfq,  Jofiah  Llark  ~ 

Jofhua  ChcevcrjEfq;  j  hn  Clap 
Rev.  Ames  Cheevcr    Jofeph  Clark 
Rev.  Peter  Cl.rk         ilaacLhild 
John  Choatc;,  Efq;      Samuel  Colburn 
Roland  Cottcn,  Efq;  Abraham  C  umings 
Jonas  Clark,  Efq;       Jofeph  C  apron 
Rev.  Sam.  Chcckley   Samuel  Cufhman 
Bci.j.  Crocker  M.  A.  C  apt.  Elea. Carpenter  Samuel  Dak;n 
Rev.  AaronC'evciand  Ber^jamin  Crabtree      BerjaminDay 
Rev.  Samuel  Cooper   J^hn  Lrablree 
Rcv.S  Chcckley.jun   James  Coding 
Jkcv.  JamesChandler  Nathaniel  Carver 
Rev.  John  Chandler    i^amuel  C  afwcll 


D 

On.  Sana.  Dan- 
forth,  Efqs 
Hon.Jof.DwighiEfq; 
Timoih)  DwightEfq; 
WilliamDownejEfqj 
Rev.  Jofeph  Davis 
Stephen  Dean 
Samuel  Dcming 
John  Deming 
Nathaniel  Davis 
C  apt.  Eliphalct  Day 
Col. Thomas  DunucH 
Hannah  Dyer 
Simeon  Dwight 
John  Deman 


Ifaac  Dodge 
Ezckiel  Dodge 
Samuel  Dwight 
Obadiah  Dickinfon 
John  Dickinfon 
Thomas  Dickinfon 
Jonathan  Dickinfon 
Azariah  Dickinfon 


Samuel  Day 
Ephraim  Dean 
David  Dean 
Elijah  Dean 
Rev.  Ji^fiah  Crocker  (  apt.  Thomas  Cobb  Ebenezer  Dean 


Rev.  S)lvaniJS'Jonart  Ebenezer  Cr^ni 


Berj.  Church, M. A. 
Capt.  J'hn  Ccdman 
Nathan  Chctvcr 
William  Ccf-ptr 
Tlirmas  Cuflnn^^ 
John  Call 
Ralph  (  rof:i 
R  (hj'd  Caiy 
jMJuifnin  Cli^pin 


jf-fiah  Connant 
Jfracl  Cheever 
John  Croxford 
Stephen  Crawfoot 
Lnmberton  C  ooper 
'A  chcus  Crocker 
Ebenezer  Child 
Jonathan  Church 
iMufva  CufSn. 


John  Dexter, 
E 

REv.  JofEmerfon 
Rev.  Andr.Eliot 
Rev,  Jofhua  Eaton 

RevJof.Emerfon,jun; 
Andrew  Eliot 
hrtwn  Emerfon 
Jacob  Emmons 
Jofeph  Edwards 


/ 


Suhf<rihers  Namesl 


Benjamin  Edwards 
John  Eli 
Samuel  Edwards 
Jofiah  Edfon 
Jonathan  Everet. 
F 


Rev.Dan.Greenleafe 
David  Gorham  Efq; 
Rev,  Ebenezcr  Gay 
Rev.  Ellis  Gray 
Rev.  J«hn  Graham 


Re  V.  Samuel  Hopkfna 
Rev.  Abraham  Hill 
R«v.Ph,.  Hemingway 
Rev.  Ellas  Haven 
Abiah  Hoibrook 
John  Hillier 

Capi.J^hn  Harmon 
V.apf.  Dan.  Hay  ward 


John  Greenleafe 
LJOn,  Francis  Fox-  Jofeph  Green 

■■'■  croft, Efq.  Samuel  Grant  ^      _^ 

H©n.Wm.Foje,Erq;  Benjamin  Greenleafe  Reuben  Hermon 
johnFairweatherErq;  James  Green  Daniel  Hubbard 

Rev.  John  Fox  ijamuel  Git^n  Aaron  Hichcock 

Rev.  Tho.  Foxcroft  Ezckiel  Goldthwait    Enoch  Holcomb 
Thomas  Greenough    Simon  Hunt 
BenjaminGoldthwait  John  Hammond 


John  Fofter,  Efq; 
William  Fenwick 
William  Fairfield 
Andrew  Frifwel 
James  Fofter 


Ab:el  Goodwin 
Daniel  Grove 
Robert  Gordon 


bamuel  Frothinfyham  I^bez  Gay 


Ebenezer  Fiflier 
James  Fofdick 
Philip  Freeman 
Jofeph  Fofter 
Ralph  Farnam 
Matthew  Farnam 
Jofeph  Farnam 
Grafton  Feveryear 
Benjamin  Fofter 
E!foaFj{h 
Ell  Forbufh 
Obadiah  Frary 
Jacob  French 
Jo^n  Field 
Gerftiom  Fletcher 
Ifaae  Farnfwcrrh 
Timothy  Fu!ler 
Edward  Fofter 
Jonathan  Freeman 
-bcephen  Fu  cr 
Jonathan  Fox 

iabez  Fifher 
ibenczcr  Freefe. 

G 
LjOn  John  Green* 
^,       .  leafc,  Ef^i 


William  George 
Jofeph  Gillfon 
Benjamin  GotC 

James  Gv^y 
Edward  Goodwin 
Samuel  Gay  ford 
Jvhn  Gunn 
Ebenezer  Guild 
Robert  Grey 
Chauncey  Graham 
Robert  Grey 
IchabodQoodin. 

H 
OOn.  Ed.  Hutch- 


Lawrence  Hart 
Nehemiah  Hail 
David  Hall 
Stephen  Hc/k'ns 
William  Hodgea 
Jofeph  Hall 
Abigail  Hall 
Jofeph  Hall,  Jun. 
William  Hack 
John  Hall 

Shad.  Hachway  M.A» 
Jacob  Hayward 
Thomas  Hayward 
N^emiah  Hcbart 
Jofeph  Hews 
Naib  Healy 
Aaron  Havs 


Capt.  Eliflia  Hedge 
infon,  E'q;  Jonathan  Hale 
Edw.Holyoke,  Preft.  jchn  Hacks 
of  Harvard-College  Stephen  HaU 
Robert  Hale,  E^qj       Eliftia  Hill 
ThomasHubbaraE  q   Henry  Hayward 
ThomasHanctxkEfqfSamuel  Haven 
J^hn  Hill,  Efq;  !V  ofcsHale 

Ed w. Hayward,  Efq;  Benjamin  Holt 
Rev.  NathHf nchman  Nehemiah  Harrcndf  Jl 
Rev.  William  Hobby  Jofeph  Holt 
Rev.  Ivory  Hovey      Caleb  Hopkins 

a  SI  a  Jchji 


Suhjcrihers   Nam^fl 

L 
TjOnEzckielLewIs 


Efq; 

H  tn.GeoLconardE'q 
Jofeph  Lemmon  Efq; 
Samuel  Leonaid^Eiq; 
Rev.  Dutilev  Leavit 
Thonia>Lm]bertErq. 
Maj.  Zeph.  Leonard 


JohnHarburt 
Willum  Humes 

iofcph  Hidden 
phfaim  HaywarJ 
Joha  Hart 
Jnhn  Hay 
Kich:  las  Hopping 
John  Hancock 

iJcnjimin  Hvird,  Jun.  Caleb  L)man 
Aaron  Hjtchinfun.     Noah  L)  man 
1  (lad  Lyman 

HOri.JohnJcfFrics,  Ehas  L^  man 
Efq;  Caltb  Lampfon 
Thomas  Jcnncr,h«q;  Sam.je'  L-rd 
Rev.  Jcdu:iah  J.  wet    John  Lan^^Jon 
Rev.  Samuel  Jtffcrds  Ebcruztr  Little 
Rev.  Ifaac  Jones  EdwardLangdon  jun. 

Rev.  Jonathan  Judd    Jokph  L\man 
1'homas  Judd  ITaac  Lyman 

Samuel  Jones  \Viiliam  L\man 

Jonathan  Ingram         Nathaniel  Lewis 
ieriamin  Ingott  Robert  Lufcomb 

Tabcz  rA>throp 
James  Leonard 
Jonathan  J.incoln 
Jonathan  Lillcy 
James  Lcland 
Jeremiah  Lawrence 
John  Long'ey^jun. 


Jerjamin  Ingott 
JDanicl  Johnfon 
th  Irigraham 
John  Johnlon 
Samuel  Ji'hnfon 
£Jward  Jn^raham. 


K 

SAmucI  Kent, Efq,    ,. -...^_,  ,j 
Rev.  Sim.Kcndall  Fcleg  I^awrence 
John  Knight                Ebenczcr  Lane 
John  Knccland 
J  bf)  Knceland,  jun 
Jonathan  Kettle 
William  Kettle 


Dudley  Kent 
Simuel  Kinfley 
David  Kennedy 
Benjamin  King 
JLbcnczcr  Kendall 
John  Kendall 
Nathaniel  Kimball 
Richard  KifnSall 
Cakb  Kimball. 


Ca|  t.  Elipb.  Leonard 
John  Littlefield 
John  LiftlcHeld,  jun. 
Daniel  Little 
Jofeph  Low 
William  L;;mron 
Jofeph  Lord 
Robert  Lawtridgc 
Ebenczcr  Luce. 

M 
LJOn.Jer.  Moulton 
E^q; 
Hun.JamcsMinoiLq 


Rev.  Hen.  Me/Tengcr 
Daniel  Moulton,  Efq; 
Capt.  Jer.  Moalton 
Rev.  John  Moorhead 
Rcv.Thad.  Maccarty 
Tim.  Minot  M.  A. 
Daniel  Mil  (h 
Buriah  Maa 
Capt-  E!e;;zerMeIvfn 
Capt.  SamMountagu 
James  Mears 
Mofes  Mar(h 
Richard  Millberry 
Samuel  MarOi 
Ebenczer  Marfh  jun. 
Daniel  Marfh 
Jt'hn  Mountagu 
Jonathan  Moody 
E'lA'ard  Mackard 
John  Mifchel 
Michael  Mctcalf 
John  Mounrgomery 
IJeij;imin  Mors 
JVIoody  Mors 
John  Mudge 
Sarah  Martyn 
Richard  Martyn 
Gerfliom  Makepeicc 
Nathaniel  Metcalf 
Cutting  Moody 
Samuel  Millberry 
Jofeph  Main 
Robert  Martyn 
Michael  Met  calf 
Sam'jei  Meriam 
Edward  ManindaJe, 
N 

F Rancid  NichoIfoH 
Afd  Noble 
Thomas  Nortor\ 
Daniel  Novcc 
Jonathan  Nicholf 
J  hn  Nichols 
John  Noyce 


1 


Suhfcribers  Names] 


Q 

HOnJofenO{b-)rn, 

Hon.Andr.OliverEfq 
William  Owen 
Jonathan  Oakes. 

P 
TjOn.Jof.Pynchon 

John  Phillips,  Efq; 
Timothy  Prout,  Efq; 
Rev.  Thomas  Prince 
Charles  Peirce,  Efq; 
OliverPareridge,Erq; 
Samuel  Pool,  Efq; 
Thomas  Pain,  M.  A. 
Rev.  Samuel  Phillips 
Rev.  Jona.  Parfons 
Rev.  Tho.  Prentice 
Rey.  Solo,  Prentice 
Rev,  John  Porter 
Rev.  Eben.  Parkman 
Rev.  John  Parker 

Rev.  Mofes  Parfons 

Rev.  Samuel  Porter 

Charles  Phelps 

Jvdartin  Phelps 

E'liiha  Pomroy 

William  Phillips 

SimPhillipsjun.M.A, 

Mofes  Peck 

Eiiflu  Pomroy 

J  >hn  Perry 

Benjamin  Parker 

William  Prefect 

James  Pullen 

William  PuHen 

Abiel  Packard 

Lydia  Packard 

James  Packard 

Ifaac  Packard 

Ebene^er  Pitts 
Fetsr  Pott 


John  Pickens 
Zechariah  PavJeford 
Cornelius  Putnam 
Jacob  Parker 
Eleazar  Pearce 
J  liin  Parker 
Jerathmeel  Pierce 
J  jfeph  Phipps 
E  ijah  Phipps 
Lemuel  Powers 
Edward  Putnam 
Stephen  Prentice 
J)hn  Pearfon 
John  Powers 
J.-.fuh  Putnam 
Nathan  Peabody 
Timothy  Prat 
Jjfeph  Parker 
J-icob  Porter 
Thomas  Payne 
John  Procter 
Daniel  Pomroy 
Ifaac  Parfons 
Jofnh  Parfons 
Jacob  Parker 
William  Patten. 

HOn.  John  Qiiin- 
cy,  Efq; 
R 

HOn.DanielRulTel 
Efq; 
Syl V.Richmond,  Efq; 
Rev.  Natb.  Rogers 
Ifaac  Royal,  Efq; 
Rev.  Solomon  Reed 
Capt.  Obadiah  Reed 
Capt.  William  Reed 
Jafeph  RobertsM.A- 
J  ->f«ph  Robey,  M.A. 
James  Rankin 
John  Robbins 
Noah  Rob  in  foil 
a  a  sa 


R 


Daniel  Reed 
Benjamin  Rockwood 
Ifaac  Rand 
Nathaniel  Rand 
George  Robmfotl 
Thomas  Rich 
Jacob  Reed 
James  Reed 
John  Robbins 
Simeon  Root. 
S 
EvJof.SewallD.D 
Rev.  Nath. Stone 
Samuel  Sewali,  Efq; 
John  Storer,  Elq; 
Jofeph  Sawyer,  Efq; 
John  Steel,  Efq; 
Nathaniel  Stone, Efqj 
Rev.  John  Shaw 
Rev.  Nathan  Stone 
Capt.EbenczerStorcf 
Jofeph  Sherburn 
Malachi  Salter 
John  Symmes 
John  Scollay 
Capt.  Edward  Sheaf 
Samuel  Phil.  Savage 
Thomas  Symmes 
Zechariah  Symmes 
Abigail  Stevens 
Capt.Jonath.  ShcMon 
Jonathan  Sheldon  jun» 
Elijah  Sheldon 
Obadiah  Smith 
Thomas  Smith 
Samuel  Smith 
Ichabod  Strong 
No;U3  Strong 
Caleb  Strong 
Elifha  Searl 
Caleb  Sheldon 
Elizabeth  St/ong 
J©h:s  §tiickland 


Suhfcrihers  frames] 


5Mnuel>mth 
]-)aniel  ^mth 
Aaron  Smith 
Cm^tni  Southworth 
Zccliariah  SucU 
Miihcw  Siniih 
i)in)on  Sloe  jmb 
Bcrj»m  n  Siaclc 
KuhSlick 
Npah  Sabin 
S»fnucl  Shacklcy 
Cipt.  J  >hn  b'.cv'cns 
John  iihrd 
Jcrcmah  Shuttack 
John  >wa'iow 

John  SpafF  rd 
.M.hn  Scott 
Thom3s  Strowbridgc 
Simucl  Somncr 
NathaniclSnell  M.A. 
C.^p^  JohnStdckwell 
John  btock'A'cli  Jan. 
William  Sh  cpird 
FrinCii  Strat'cn 
R-^harJ  Strattcn 
B:wvhcnScwii!,M.A. 
^licharl  Share 
Abraham  Sm:;h 
luac  Sini:i; 
Bcrj^min  Smiih 
Jjha  Smich 
Jfaac  Smith  jun, 
Samuel  Sar^  cut 
Daniel  Fijjjw 

J  ' 

U'  arj 

S^niuri  ^cwa'I 
£«inuei  Bcwt'tn,  j'in. 
f^amuel  Scwaii,  Vcr. 
lknj\niin  Scone 
Jcrtaihai)  Savward 

IN..,         -..ck- 


Ruth  Shck 
Thomas  Stanley 
Luke  St^bhins 
Eihanan  Spear 
Jofeph  Svviin. 

T 
/^XcnbridgcThat- 
^^  chcr,    Efq; 

Rcv'.  Samuel  Tobcy 
Rev.  Row).  Thacher 
Rev.  Peter  Thacher 
William  Thomfun 
Tvbj.  Nath.  Thwing 
Jofcph  Torry 
RichjrJ  Thorn pfon 
Stephen  Titcomb 
Sjmuic!  Trcaclwtll 
William  Thomas 
Henry  True 
Peter  Thaver 
Gcifhom  Tinncy 
Archibald  Thomas 
Ifiacl  Tifdale 
Ji)hn  Tifdalc 
Barth^lemew  Town 
Juhn  Town 
Solomon  TownftJnd 
David  Trail 
David  Taylor 
Richard  Tiippen 
Timothv  'i'iippen 
Samuel  Titconib 
CVpf.  Samuel  T)Ier 
(apt.  Samuel  Tingle)' 
J<mes  IMlfjn 
John  Tawa 
W.jliam  Tenill 
Wj^oltrsvurthTapen 
MofrsTuttlc 
lildau  Ta  vl.ir, 

U 

l-jU^h  V  ins 
Jibcz  Upbara 


Richard  Upham 
Nathaniel  Upham, 

V/ 
OOn.    Jofiah  Wil- 
*"^  lard.Efq; 

Hon.  Jacob  Wendell, 
Efq; 
Hon.Sam.Wellcs.Efq 
Hun. Sim.  WattsEfqi 
Rev.  Edward   Wig- 
gle fworth,  D.  D» 
Rev.  Nehe.     Walter 
EdwardVVinflow^Efq 
Rev.  Jeremiah  Wife 
Rev.  Wm.  Williams 
JcfhuaWinflow,Erq; 
Rev.SamueiWigglef- 
wortb, 
Njhum  Ward,  Efqs 
Rev.  John  Webb 
Rev.  Abjab  Weld 
Rev.  John  WaJcs 
Rer.  Juhn  Walle7 
RevChef^er  Williams 
Pele.^  Wifwall  A.M. 
Ifaac  Walker 
Jonathan  Wills 
ThL*)nias  Wait 
John  WmQovv 
John  Weft 
Daniel  W^air 
Capt.  David  Wyt? 
David  XVood 
Thomas  Wood 
I^ezaliel  Wilder 
Ji  fe})h  Whitney 
Jonathan  Wella 
Thcmaa  V/y»r 
S'cnhcr.  VVright 
Oliver  Warner 
?"fiiua  Wells 
Nathaniel  Well§ 
Ui\icd  Ward 

; 


I 


Sul>fcrlhers  Natnes, 


Arteraas  Ward 
Benjamin  White 
Jeremiah  Whipple 
Naihaniel  Whitney 
B^njamii  Wheeler 
Francis  Wheeler 
Nath.  Whittemore 
He^zskiah  Ward 
Ob^diah  Walker 
Sarah  Williams 
Simeon   Wilijajus 
James  Walker 


Peter  Walker 
Ifaac  Whitney 
Nath.  Williams 
Abiel  Williams 
Joliah  Waters 
William  Whitweli 
Jonaihaa  White 
John  Woods 
Ifaae  Woods 
Obadiah  Wright 
James  Wilfoa 
Jonathan  Wheelock 


Oliver  Watfon 
Ebenezer  Warren 
John  Watfon, jun. 
Jotham  Walton 
Jabez  Weaze 
John  Whiting 
Jonath:in  Whiting 
Jofhua  Winter 
Ephraim  Weffea. 

Y 
TJ  Enajah  Young, 


COLONT  OF  CONNECTICUT^. 


CHfiftopherAvory, 
Efg; 
Capt.  John  Avered 
Abraham  AwQty 
John  Alien 
Joftiua  Avered 
Jofeph  Alien 
Jafon  Allen 
Richard  Andrews 
Jofeph  Arnold 
Enoch  Arnold 
Samuel  Andrews 
|"ohn  Abbie 
Phillip  Abbot 
Samuel  Afhie/,  jun. 

B 
<THsophiIus  Bild- 
*•  win,  Efq 

Col.  Aaron Brovvnfon 
William  Buel,  Efq; 
John  ^is.%^    Erq; 
Samuel  BaiTet,  Efq; 
Rev.  Wm.  Burnham 
Rev.  |ofeph  Bellamy 
Rev'„  Ge«.  Bsckwitl'j 


Jofeph  Bird,  Efq; 
RevDan  Buckingham 
Capr.  JonathanBaker 
Capt.  [ohn  Bebee 
Timothy  Brownfon 
Richard  Brownfon 
Matthew  Bellamy 
MatthewBsllamrjun. 
Samuel  QQlVdmy 
Abel  Bains 
Jonathan  Benedick 
Thomas  Benedick 
Thomas  Bstts 
Ifaac  Brownfon 
Jofiah  Q:ow»('on 
Thomas  Brov/nfon 
James  Bild  win 
Jofiuh  Bumb 
James  8raufor«J 
Hczckiah  B'ilU 
Daniel  Bjtt 
Ebenezer  Balch 
Capt.  Samuel  Bebee 
Enoch  Bayer 
Benjamin  Baldwin 
Theophilus  Baldwin 
Benjamin  Blackman 


Jonathan  Brownfon 
Theop.  Baldwin  jun, 
Jonathan  Billings 
Jonathan  Bradford 
Pelatiah  BHfs 
William  Bennet 
Capt.  Samuel  Blftiop 
Samue!  B«tt 
Ebenez«r  Baldwin 
Nathaniel  Browa 
Mofes  Rarret 
Elijah  Belcher 
Jonathan  Brewfter 
Samuel  Branch 
Benjamin  Blogget 
Tho.  Btncdick,  jun, 
James  Buld  win 
Abraham  Bennet 
Caleb  Baldwin 
Jonathan  Botsfcrd 
Jacob  Banee 
James  Bebee 
Abel  Beech 
Jonathan  Burr 
Noah  Baldwin 
Joel  Baldwin* 
Nathaniel  Brownfofl! 
Ctoles  Brownfon 


Suhf^rihers  N^mes, 


William  Btbes 

Daniel  Braincfd 

Azar  Beech 
onaihfcn  Badger 
onathan  Bingham 
ofcph  Bingham 

Alalichi  Butler 

Solomon  Bill 

OlivciBrcwftcr. 
C 

COL'-ConantEfq; 
Maj  Samuel  Coit 
Jofcph  Clark,  K^q; 
Rev  ThomasCanlield 
Jw)hn  Crcry,  E'"q; 
dpi.  Elcazer  Carey 
Jofiah  Conant 
Jofeph  Clark 
Hezekiah  Camp 
Chirles  Chopcn 
NaihaniclCompalk 
James  Clap 
John  Comllock 
ZebadiahComltock 
Samccl  Comltjck 
Gideon  Comftock 
JohnCdpp 
Nathaniel  Culhman 
J)t:adatus  Curtifs 
J«njthan  Cafs 
Nathaniel  Conc 
Jofcp'i  Cone 
John  Church 
Capt.  Samuel  Cowlcs 
Matthew  Cole 
(icorge  Clark,  A  M. 
Maiihcw  Cadwell 
Capt.  ThD.  Curtiis 
Lbw-ncfccr  Coc 
yktsriahCurtifs 
Jofeph  Clark 
Elcazer  Clark 
D--icl  Cur  lift 


Obadiah  Cook 
Jonathan  Clarkjun. 
Scth  Cutler 
John  Clark 
Benjamin  Chaplin 
I3cnjaminCh;iplinjun. 
bamuclCoburn. 


D 

ELiphalet  Dyer, 
E^q; 

Rcv.MofesDickinfon 

Samuel  Dorrance 

George  Dorrance 

Robert  Denifoti* 

Avery  Denifon 

Capt.  John  Douglafs 

Seih  Dcin,  A.  M. 

William  Dcnifcn 

Adam  Denifon 

Jonathan  Dean 

Kbcnezer  Dains 

Jedidiah  Dana 

Abi  Dammon 
Daniel  Dudley 
John  Djwn 
Elcazec  Dicklnfon 
A  fa  Douglafs 
Jofiah  Dean 
Jonathan  Dcvercux 
Naihaniel  Dean 
William  De.in 
13erjimin  Denton 
IJenjimin  J)aning 
Ebcnezcr  i^owne 
Ehenczer  Dains 
Silas   Doan 
Jtdidiih  Dana, 

E 

S  Amu  el  Emmons 
Ebcnezcr  Everit 
John  Enjlidi 


IOrephFowler,Efq; 
Rev.  Jnfeph  Ki{h 
Capt.  Benjamin Fenn 
Amos  Fuller 
Nathaniel  Fifli 
John  Flower 
Ephraim  Fellows 
Nathaniel  Ford 
William  Farnam 
Ezekiel  Fox 
Thomas  Fargo 
Stephen  Fuller 
Zebediah  Farnam 
Phineas  Ford 
EliHia  Fitch 
Pclatiah  Ficch 
Ruth  Fobes 
Simon  Fobes 
Daniel  Fitch 
Jofiah  Finney 
John  Fmney 
Abigail  Falmon 
Ebenezer  Fuller 
Samuel  Fielding 
James  Flint 
Matthias  Fuller 
Thomas  Fitch,  jun, 
G 

REv.  John  Gra- 
ham 
Math.  Gr'ifwold  E'q; 
Capt.NathanGidiiens 
Rev.  Jicob  Green 
Obaduh  Gore 
Jofeph  (Tannings 
Henry  Gibbs 
Thomas  Goodwin 
John  Gourdon 
J  >hn  Ciroman 
John  Gillet 
Francis  Guitcau 
Timothy  Goodwin 
Benj. 


Suhfcrihers  Names, 


Ebenezer  Grant 
Benjamin  Graves 
Lemuel  Griffin 
Jedidiah  Graves 
iiamuel  Gillet 
Ifaac  Grifworth 
Alexander  Gordon 
Daniel  Gates. 
H 

HOn.Hezek.  Hun- 
tington, Efq; 
JabezHuntingtonEfq 
Rev.  Dan.  Humphry 
Noah  Hinman,  Efq; 
Capt.Ele.Hutchinfon 
John  Hutchinfon 
James  Hanes,  jun. 
Samuel  Hare 
Barnabas  Hall 
Nathaniel  Hall 
William  Holt 
PwObefC  Holt 
Jofiah  Hammon 
Nathaniel  Hovey 
NathanielHovey  jun. 
Zsbediah  Holt 
John  Houfe 
Stephen  Hutchinfon 
Samuel  Houfe 
Lebnit  Harris 
Kaac  Higley 
Ifaac  H('fFord 
Jofeph  Flinfdell 
Jofiah  Burlburt 
Daniel  Hoffjrd 
Tofiah  Hooker 
Capt.Mofes  Hawkins 
Benjamin  Hicock 
Eleazer  Flinm^n 
Stephen  Hicock 
Andrew  Hinman 
Juftus  Hicock 
John  Hove/ 


JamesHurlburtM.D. 
Jufhua  Holt 
Paul  Holt 
John  Hibbard 
Henry  Hewit 
Daniel  Holt 
Nehem.  Huntington 
Richard  Hide 
Obadiah  Heath 
David  How 
Robert  Hebard 
James  Mc'Hillhoufe 
Abel  Holbrook 
John  Hal! 
Nathaniel  Hide 
Jonathan  Hinckley 
Thomas  Harvey 
Jofeph  Huntington 
Jofhua  Hendie 
Chrifto.  Huntington 
Reuben  Hubbard 
William  Hambleton 
Ifaac  Hill,  jun. 
James  Hooker 
Hezck.  Hooker,  jun, 
William  Hooker 
Hugh  Hanna 
Ahira   Hill. 
I 

REv.  David  Jewit 
Rev  David  Judfon 
Jacobjohnfon,  A.M. 
James  Ingalls 
William  Johnfon 
Jr.fcph  Jacobs,  jun. 
Nathaniel  Jewit 
James  Jud 
Abel  Judfon 
Ebenezer  Janes 
Calebjohnfjn. 
K 

JGnsthan  Kelfey 
R'jbert  Kennedy 


Dennifon  Kingfljcrry 
Jonathan  Kingfbcrr/ 
Thomas  Kenny 
Azariah  Kenny 
Timothy  Kimball 
Jofiah  Kin^fley 
James  Kaflba 
Samuel  Knowles 
Eldad  King 
Joh»  Kafen 
Benjamin  Kellogg 
Samuel  Kellogg. 

IJjOn.SamuclLynde 
"  Efq; 

Rev.  Henry  Lord 
Rev.  Jonathan  Lee 
Rev.   Mark  Leaven- 
worth 
Sam.  Lock  wood  A  M^ 
James  Lockwood 
Jofeph  Lee 
Jofeph  Lee,  jun, 
biimeon  Lyman 
John  Landon 
Ebenezer  Leach 
Nathaniel  Loomis 
Jjcob  Lyman 
Divld  Lyman 
Ifaac  Lawrence 
Jofeph  Lockwood 
Peter  Lockwood 
Nehemiah  Lewi* 
Hezekiah  Lee 
Jirhn  Ledyard 
Ebenezsr  Lyman 
Jcfiah  Lyman 
Benoni  Loomis 
J  -feph  Loomis 
Benjamin  Lothrop 
Thomas  Lyraan 
Nathaniel  L  iomis 
Thomas  Loomis 

Samue^l 


Samuel  Lee 
Ifaac  Lawrence 
Bcr\jamin  Lord. 
M 

Simeon  Minor,Efq; 
Rev.  QidconMills 
RevEvanderMorrifoD 
Capt  Richar^Mcnfon 
Daniel  Mccks 
S«muel  More 
Jtaaihan  Mcaritt 
Hczekiah  May 
Samuel  Miner 
J»hn  Meigs 
John  Meijs,  joji. 
bamuel  MarQ^all 
Jimcs  Morris 
Jonathan  Munger 
Jiphraim  Miner 
element  Minor 
Matthew  Minor 
Matthew  Mitchel 
Simon  Mitchel 
Jonathan  Martin 
Sarah  Millard 
J3avid  Miller 
Thomas  Millard 
Jonathan' Maliby 
Jofiah  Mack 
William  Morgan 
r>anicl  Morgan 
Jofcph  Morgan  ' 
Thomas  Marfhal 
Kcv.  Sjmue.'  Mofe'y 
Nathaniel  Mofcly 
([jcorgc  Martin 
C^corgc  M.irtin,  jun 
Lbcrczer  Martin. 
N 

]Ohn  Ncwcomb 
Obadiah.Newcom 
Na.hjp:cl  Newell 

Ruth  NcwcJl 


Suhfmhers  Names] 

Hezek'ah  Ncwcomb  Theodore  PreRon  '^ 


Jfaac  Nortun,  jun, 
Jtmcs  Norton 
Ji  nathai)  North 
£benezcr  North 
O 


Timothy  Pearl 
Cart,  iraac  Parifa 
Edward  Paine 
Jofcph  Porter 
Abraham  Pcirfon 


iApt.S.muelOlm-  Gerfhcm  Palmer 
'  ftcad  Benjamin  Pcmroy 


John  Owen 
Jufeph  Otis 
vViliiam  Ofgood 
Daniel  Ofgood 
James  Occom. 
^  P 


Timoihy  Porter 
Williani  Porter 
John  Peck 
Jacob  Prefton 
William  Prefton.- 
R 
Ev.Dav  Rowland 


SAmuelPrenticeEfq  T\ 
-  JofcphFitkm,  Efq;  ^Rev.N^il  Roberta 


Jcieph  Perliin5,A.M 

J«  hn  Porter 

Experience  Porter 

B#njam!n  Paine 

Jofeph  Prefti  n 

John  Potwine 

Jjhn  Pair  c 
William  Peai>ody 
Simuel  Piumb 
Jonathan  Prentice 
Peter  Pov/ers 
Thcmas  Phelps 
Nathaniel  Porter 
Richard  Pect 


Rev.  -Aibcr  Rt.fuer 
J  hn  R;  binil.n 
Jchabcd  R  bmfon 
Eiifha  Rcickweli 
Nathan  Randall 
Jofhua  Ra\  mor.d 
Jufiah  Rofe 
Rufus  Rude 
George  Richards  ^ 
Ebenezer  Richardfoa 
David  Ripley 
Az^riah  Rood 
J'.'feph  Richards 
Samuel  Ravmond 


Nathaniel  Porter  jun.  Jonathan  RufTdl 
Ifaac  Peck  Samuel  Robbins 


Henry  Peck 
Micjih  Pride 
David  Palmer 
John  Palmer 
Kufu9  Price 
John  Phelps 
Ezckitl  Peirce 
J  mcs  Pinncs 
Mary  Pierce 


Eliakim  Ra}mond 
Jofeph  Rofts 
SaraaclRindle^ 

S 
npHomasStorrs  E'q; 

^  Rev.Rich.Silter 
BerJaminStiles  A.M. 
J'feph  Spencer 

Willianj  Steward' 


Capt.  Edward  Phelps  James  Steward 
}Am  I'tiice  Ji:'cicr  Spencer 


Jofcfh 


Suhfcrihers  Names] 


JofephSk'fF 
Nithaniei  Shattock 
J  >reph  Sailard 
Ifrael  Shaw 
Eliakim  Smith 
Daniel  Si  John 
Thomas  Seymour 
William  :)umner 
Samuel  Steel 
Afa  Strong 
Nathaniel  Skliiner 
Eliflia  Sheldon 
Az^r  Smith 
Capt.  John  Sprague 
Huchcns  Storrs 
Capt.  Samuel  Storrs 

Capt.  Jof.  Sweetland 

Recompence  Smith 

Jof.  Sweetland,  jun. 

Thomas  Shaw 

Jacob  Stebblns 

Jonathan  Smith 

J;)hn  Steel 

tjamuel  Strong 

John  Sherman 

Giles  Siaufihter 

Ifaac  Scudder 

JofephSt.Jihn 

Daniel  Si.J  hn 

Samuel  Saiiford 

John  Sanford 

Andrew  Sanford 

David  Sanford 

EphraimStrong  A.M 

f ofeph.  Saff.»rd 

Solomon  SafFord 

Ezekicl  Story 

Jofeph  5  nford 

Ephraim  ^m-th 

J^cob  Str&ng 

Jcihn  Shepard 

Z^ebulon  Se)'mour 

fcarauel  Smcdiey 


Capt.  Eliftia  Stoddard  Jof.Wncockfon,Erq; 

^  '^  '  -'-       -  Roger  WolcottjEfqj 

David  Whitney, E!q; 
Rev.Solom,  Williams 
Ebenezer  Wales,  Efq; 
NaihanielWales,Erq; 
Rev.  Stephen  White 
Rev.  Jabcz  Wright 
Rev.Eben.Wheclock 
Warham  Williams 

Tut.  Yale  CoK 
Peletiah  Webftcr 


Jofiah  Strong 
James  Stoddard 
David  Stowell 
Ebenezer  Stowell 
David  Smith 
Ann  Seldin 
Samuel  Spencer 
Benjamin  Smalley 
Eljah  Sprague 
Elizibeth  Swiff. 
T 


/^Api 


James  Tyler  Eliftia  Wanea 


W   Mofec  T>ler 
Stephen  Tucker 
Jedidiah  Tracy 
Hopeftil  Tayler 
Nathaniel  Tracy 
Daniel  Tracey 
Joel  Thrall 
Samuel  Tracey 
Elifha  Tracey 
Philip  Turner 
Nathaniel  Tracey 
JcTeph  Tracey 
EliakimTupper 
E«  mond  Tompkins 
Ndihaniel  Thornton 
Samuel  Tonfly 


Benoni  Wright 
William  Williams 
Ebenezer  Wiiliamsi 
John  Watfon 
Caleb  Wheeler 
Wil'iamWaafworth 
Bti jamin  Wheat 
Joftph  Williams 
William  Whitter 
Eleazer  Wright 
Nathaniel  Wales 
Jjfeph  Warner 
Katharine  Webifff 
Samuel  Woodward 
Ifrael  Woodward 
Preferved  Wright 


Capt.  JofiihThatcher  Icbibod  VVarner 
James  Tompfon  Benjamin  Wirchol 


WilliamTrumball 
Jonathan  Twifs 
Ebentzcr  Tompfon 
Ebenezer  Taylor 
John  Tweedy 
Taaits  Tuttle. 
^  U 

/^Apt.  JamesUtley. 

W 

/^OiEifh.  Williams 

a  a3  a 


Charles  WoodrufF 
Berjamin  Woodruff 
Efnathan  Whitman 
Joftiua  Whitney, jun. 
Daniel  Williams 
Samuel  Warner 
9tby\k  Whitehead ( 


Pnvmt 


Suhfcrihers  Names, 

Province    of  N ElVTO  R  K. 

A  Ft 

Wflliani     AJams,  QTcphcn  Foffer       CAmuelLondonErq; 
A.  M.  •^  G  ^  Willi.  Lawrence 

B  X  1  A^Abra.Garner  Benjamin  Lawrence 

1Sa.ic  Bnrnes,   Efq;   ^'^    William  Glean  Capt.BenjLhomedieu 
Ellas  Baiiev,  Efq;  Thomas  Goldfmith     PVBLevingftoa  A.M 
Rev.  David  Boftsvick  Daniel  Goldfmith        JamesLopor. 
Rev.   Ifaac   Brown      Jafper  Griffin.  M 

Rev.  Simuel  BucI  H  tlOn.E.  Miller  Efq 

Jona.  Barber,  A.  M.   CLifhaHutchinfon,  *"**  Andrew  Miller 
Capt.  WilJiamBryanl  *-^  Efq;  Samuel  Mulford 

Samuel  Brown  Rob.  Hempfted,  Efq;  Daniel  Miller 

BernJaminBiiley  Jofiah  Howell,  Efq;     Thomas  Mulford 

Nathaniel  Bailey         Rev.  Azar.  Horton    Lemuel  Mulford 
Elias  Bailey,  jun.        Jon. Hunting,  A.  M,  Ifrael  More 
Elizabeth  Hreezs        William  Hedges  Thomas  More 

John  Biilcy  Jofeph  Hicks  John  Mackie 

J  »cob  Bergen  Samuel  Hazard  Capt. -- Merfey 

Beujamin  Biufter.       JonathanHazard,jun.  Daniel  More 

C  Nathaniel  Hazard        John  Mitchell 

¥lOn.  Tho.  Chat-  John  Hunting  John  Marfton 

*  A  field,  Efq;  Exekiel  Hedges  Zcbulon  Mills 

J /cph  Conklin  John  Hedges  Ifaac  Mills 

Jofvph  ConklinTcr.   Benjamin  Hutchinfon  William  Miller 
:5^«.ucl  Cox  Abigail  Hull  Hannah  MeniO). 

Tnonus  Coupcr  Conftant  Havens  N 

J(.hnC.>«-.k  Samuel  Howell  /^  Eorge  Norton 

Davitj  Corwiih  Samuel  Hunting  ^-^ 

NJ.uniaii  Car,)cnter  ('apt.  Theo.  Howell  P 

Jof(  ph  Carpenter        El. (ha  Howell  p  Ev.  Ebenez.Pem- 

JiCch  Carle  ilVael  Flaifey  Ia.  berton 

A*in  Cafle.  Capt.Eleaz.  Hawkins  R 

D  Kieazc  Hawkin«,jun.    »  Ohn  Rhc 

^Am-jcl  Uentrn         Charles  Howell  J 

»^    Jjleph  Djvi,         Abraham  Howell  S 

Margaret  Du  Bull       Fzekie)  Ilowell  YyllliamSmith,Erq; 

Daiiiel  Daiton.  Kcnjan  in  Hinchman         Capt.  VVm.  Smith 

^  Samuci  Higbce,  jun.  WilliamP.^mithA.M. 

P  ^«*<cl  Evcrct  1  Nicholas  Snith 

■*-'   Nicholas  Evcrct  I Otn  Jennings  Liizabeth  StttweU 

John  Evcrcc  J   Tlrmas  Jyiup        Cuibcrc  .Smiih 

b:mon  L.i  N^rh.  n  fv^.-.  Richari 


Suhfcrihers  Names. 


RIchari  Smith 
Job  Smith 
Benjamin  Strong 
Selah  Strong 
Benajah  Strong 
Thomas  Strong, 


W 


REv.VVm.Throcp   lOfeph  Wickam 


John  rhurftun 
Tonahan  Tornpl'on. 

U 
*YOfcph  Vdlentine 


t  Elq; 

Kev.  Sylvanus  Whue 
1  Inaihan  White 
Richard  Wigging 
Benjamin  Wright 
Richard  VVoodhulj^ 
Rich.  WV,odhull  jun, 
Obadiah  Wells, 


PROVINCE    OF   N  EW'J  ERS  ET. 


T>  Ev.Tho.Ahthur 
*^  JohnAyreSjEf  ; 
William  Allen 
John  Anderfon 
Janet  Aikman 
Hannah  Anderfon 
Mofes  Ayres 
William  Axtell 
Jonathan  Arrifon 
Henry  Axtell 
Thomas  App'egate 
James  Afnton 
W^ilJiam  Aline. 
B 

RE^^.Aa.BarrPrefi. 
of  N.JirfnyCol 
Rev   Eiiab  Byram 
Robert  Barkley 
Henerica  Bennom 
Samuel  Brown 
Daniel  Bayles,  jun. 
Caleb  Baldwia 
Ifaac  B.bbet 
Ebenezsr  Byramjun. 
William  Boyd 
Samuel  Beaty 
Solomon  Brown 
Frederick  Buchelow 
John  Buckelow 


Samuel  Barren 
Timothy  B^ll 
John  Black 
Francis   Rrewftcr 
Robert  Breden 
Peter  Booth 
Robert  B  air. 
C 

REv.JaraCampbeH 
(ame^  Cr lumnoe 
Mary  Craig 
Thomas  Comra^ 
Barnabas  Curtifs 
Jonathan  Comes 
John  Carr,  jun. 
William  Collwell 
Elizabeth  Crawford 
William  Cruckfhank 
Jean  Cathcart 
John  Chambers 
W^illiam  Cove/)haven 
Alexandria  Cr^jig 
Ezra  Gary 
John  Cary 
Daniel  Cary 
Jacob  Coazocart 
Thomas  Cock 
Samuel  Clark. 


s  a  aa  2 


D 

O  Ev.  Jamts  Da- 
*-^  venport 

Narhaniel  Dotey 
Henry  D-fbroy 
Lucus  J^vvedt 
William  Davifcm 
WilliamDavifon,  ym 
Samuel  Daly  high 
Duncan  DovQ^ 
E 

MAfkell  Ervln 
David  Enghfa 
James  Englifh     . 
NoahEley. 
F 

J  Ames  Fullerfon 
Jeremiah  Field 
Michael  Field 
Kitharinc  Frazlci 
Charles  Ford 
Jonathan  Frazec 
William  i'\»rd 
Saiali  f'rancia 
NathaniclyKi  Her 
J  ihnFinley. 
G 

William  GdHon 
Divid  Gioze^ 
Eilenor  Gjlhland 

Jofcpii 


Suhfcrihers  Ntwtes. 


fofcph  Gafton 
Hcndnck*^i»ilock 
Jucham  Gulock. 

H 
'lO'iath.Hulmcs,Erq. 
.1  Rev  Andr.  Hunter 
Thomas  Hamblin 
Jonas  Hocy 
Adam  Hall 
Mofes  Hemb 
Mary  Heid 
Francis  Hall 
James  Hamilton 
bimon  Horn 
William  Horn 
Hannah  Horn 
William  Hugan 
fjhn  FIcndcrfjn 
John  HM 
Michael  Henary 
William  Henary 
Daniel  Henary 
John  Hoey. 

1 
CAmuel  J  *hnfon, 
•^  Hfqj 

Richard  Jewell 
"William  J  ties 
S(ej)hen  Jcfup, 

K 

C>^n  King 
hn  Kelly 
Akxande'KilIpairick 
Williau)  Ktrr 
Samuel  Kcr 
Jjh.ph  Kcr. 

^^RlV,   I'lio.  Lewis 
J'viiraim  Lnckhcari 
iVter  Lccnn  e.M.D. 
Kjtbariric  />lord 
li<y.m  ;Iv<cfly 


J 


James  Lvan 
Levi  Lewis 

James  Lisdcy 
R  >ger  Lawfon 
Ehphalet  Lewis 
Mary  LtfF:rs 
Abraham  La  Rue 
Thomas  Lake 
Samuel  Lowden. 

M 
T>  ev.Cbarlcs  Mac- 
-^  knight 

Samuel  Mac'Conkey 
Mary  Mih'ikin 
El.zabeth  Mtllikin 
Jamcs'-Moore 
Robert  Mc'Fee 
Mary.Maitifon 
Aaron  Mactifon 
John  Macferran 
h'eter  Mac' Dowel 
David  Mac'Cv)vvin 
Matthias  Mount 
Anne  Mount 
John  Morehead 
Thomas  Mcrfhon 
Jofeph  Mon'ov/ 
J  hn  Macombs 
Mary  Mac  mbs 
Samuel  M^comaly 
Andrew  Mackmakin 
Jdtties  Magce 
S^rah  Macalalter 
Jan,e>  Martin 
John  Mac'Ciiilird 
Cicor^e  Milis 
Ifjac  Mills 
Beija.  Mp.ckrarlino; 
( jcof^e  Mitc'K  fk.a 
J^cob  Mamlon 
Hugh  Martin 
James  Martin 
rraocis  Mac'Konnic 


N 

WliiiamNorcrofs 
Rob.  Newell 
Sanauel  Neilfon 
Thomas  Newman. 

O 
TOhn  Oiivantj 
'^  Stephen  Ogdcn. 
P 

REv.  John  Peirfon 
Tho.  Paget, Elq; 
Jofeph  Peck,  Efq; 
JohnPeirfonjun.M.D 
Tobias  Polemus 
Ephraim  Phillips 
Peter  Parine 
Howell  P;well 
Herbert  Peck 
Jimes  Pitney 
John  Porter. 
R 

HOn  JuhnReading 
Efqi 
Martin  RycrfQn,Eiqi 
R  bert  R.ife 
James  R  -fs 
Sarah  Read 
Brict  R.hy 
J  >hn  Roy 

Nath.  jbicz  Randolph 
Matihew  Rue 
Simuel  Rolte 
Robed  Roel 
Abraham  Reeves 
John  Rofbrugh 
John  R.;ncy 
RobcitRenolds, 

S 
p>  Alph  Smith,  Wv 

Rev.  Elihu  Spencer 
Michai-1  bweeiman 
Denck  Sutvan 


Suhfcrihers  Thames. 


John  Stockton 
John  Sodon 
Derick  Sutvan 
Aiburt  Shank 
William  Suobey 
Luke  Scank 
Ht-nry  Sloan 
James  Stout 
Henry  Scajy, 


CJe^, 


T  Koart  Van  Voorhaat 

Wm  Tennent  Henrick  Voorhas 


John  Tomfon 
Rurh  Towefhend 
Aaron  Tern  Ton 
Jrfiah  Throope. 
U 

THomas  Vanclife 
Art  Vankirk 


Thomas  Urmftone 
Tobias  Van-Nordcn. 
W 

EleazerWales 
J.WctheriU,Efq, 
Agnis  Watfon 
J^mes  Wales. 


Rp 


PENNSTL  VAN  I  A. 


A  Matthew  Clarfcfon 

^VTWWzm  Adams     Th  mas  Oark 

'^  Arch,  ^nderfon  John  Larfcn 
Thomas  Armftrong  J  -mes  Craig 
David  Allen.  Kuharine  Culley 

B  David  Chambers 

Vy  Ev.  Char.  Beatty  Jacob  Cooper 
*-^Rev.  SamuelBlair  Samuel  Cheefeman 


Rev.  John  Blair 
Thomas  Brov^n 
Hugh  Bartley 
John  Bowrhn 
Stephen  Bower 
Ifaac  Billien 
Nathaniel  Britten 
Robert  Bredcn 
George  Bradley 
J  -hn  Elakly 
Edmond  Beach 
William  Biddle 
E.  Bou^inot 
Thomas  B  ;urne 
Jofeph  ^iddome 
Andrew  Blackburn 
Jofeph  Browne 
John  B  yd. 
C 


John  Campbel 
Mary  Campbel 
William  Clingan 
George  Clingan 
Mofes  Cravi'ford 

James  Cumings 
imes  Craven 
Daniel  Craig 
John  Crawford. 

D 
T>  Obert  Downey 
-^-^  Thomas  Davis 
Tr  ftram  Davis 
John  Davis 
Jonathan  Drewrcl 
Mary  Dobin. 

E 


John  FInlcy 
Hugh  Fargufon 
J  >hn  Fullerlawa 
Thomas  Francis 
John  Fifher 
Rt  bert  Fin  ley 
ManafTeh  Finley 
Wjjliam  Falconar 
John  Freenaan 
Jofeph  Fox 
Samuel  Fifher 
John  Frazier. 
G 
Apt.  Wm 


C 


Grant 


DAvid  Edmlfton 
John  Edward 
XY/M.  Craig,  E'q;  Robert  Ealtburn 
^^  Tho.CraigEfq;  WilhamEdmifton. 
Rev,  Alex.Cumming  F 

Ais;^ander  Colbreth    O  Ev.  Sam.  Finley 
^^Magnes  Falconar 


'  John  Gvty 
Hugh  Gunning. 
H 

A  Lex.  Hunter, Efq; 
Cap<  Jam.Huftoa 
Samuel  Hazard 
Jjfeph  Hair 
Benjamin  Hair 
Hugh  Hamilton 
Robert  Henry 
Alexander  Hannah 
William  Hodge 
Andrew  Hodge 
Hugh  Hodge 
Ka<hrine  Harrifon 
Jofeph  Hall 


Suhjcrikrs  Names 


^^m.  Smith,  Efqi 
Q>S 


Mary  fleron  Abel  Marple 

Pcnn  HoaJc  John  Mac'Coombs 

Tames  Horner  Alexander  Magec       ^  'Samuel  Smith 

Thomas  Hutchinfon    Hugh  Mc'Cullough   William  bhippcn 

Thomas  Hcrren  James  Mc'Cullough  Jofeph  Shippcn 

William  Heflct  Anthony  Morris         Jol)n  bmith 

1  John  Mc^Nair  James  Simplon 

CApt.Rob.  Jamir^n  James  Martin '  Abraham  Scott 

Samuel  Johnfon  ThomasMc'Cracken  Henjamin  Snodgrak 


Henry  J  ami  fen 
Henry  Joicnfton. 

K 
'T'Horaas  Kid 
^     Mary  King 
Henry  Kclfey 
James  Kelly 
John  Kirkpatrick 
James  Ker 
Jofeph  Ker. 

REvDanLawrcncc 
Thomas  Logan   fj  Annah  Owen 
Thomas  Lewis  *•  •*■ 

Fiancis  Linfil 


Alexander  Miller       Thomas  Smith 
John  Miller  Robert  Stewart 

Tho.  Mounrgomery  AnthcBiy  Scout 


James  Mc'Kee 
Alex.  Mc'Clintock 
John  Mudict 
Tohn  Mackmath. 

N 
SAmuelNeilfon 
James  Neilfon 
Thomas  Nefmith. 

O 


Archibald  Leari 
Robert  Lyle 
Charles  Lyons 
Jofeph  Leech. 
M 


npHomas  Poe 
•■■     John  Poak 
John  Potter 
James  Pethoren 
Jeremiah  Peck 


CApt.  Nath  M3gec'-arah  Prichard 
Alexander  Moure  John  Pcet. 
J^.hn  Mc'Ferren  R 

Robert  Mc'Cracken   R^v.  John  Rnan 
John  Mc'Ciillock  V\iiiam  Rankin 

John  Mitchell 
Ifibcl  Mc'Donnel 
M^nhcw  Mc'Min 
7hi.mas  Miller 
J'»hn  Man 
J^'fhua  Ma'.Jdox 
John  Mc'Lall 
^iar^h    Moore 
C  ':j]cn  Mdc'Swcny 


Francis  Ricliley 
Fvan  RawianJ 
|ohn  Riddle 

'/'hnmas  Ruddy  , 

Kliz^beih  Rubctde^u  Ldward  Warner 
S.  Robeitfon  Rochal  Wallace 


▲dnari  Scout 
George  Spaffota 
Mary  Stevens 
Thomas  Sloan. 

T 
15  Ev.Gilb.Tennent 
Rev.  Rich.  Treat 
Mofes  Thompfon 
Tunis  Titus 
Jcfliua  Thomas 
Hugh  Torrence. 

U 
OEnry  Vernor 
*-•■  Henry  VanDykc 
Ifuiah  Vanfandt. 

W 
r^Apt.Rich.  Walker 
^^Corncl.  Wynkoop 
Nicholas  VVynkoop 
Jchji  Wjpton 
James  Wyer 
VVillnm  Walker 
Robert  Wyer 
Mt.fcs  VVMiire 
Hugh  Wdfon 
ohn  VValker 


James  R^UIon 
'Willum  Rufli 
Sarah  P.fvnoI'J?? 


1  homas  Wclfh. 
Y 

William  Yo'i?. 
NLff 


Subjerihers  Names. 

Province  of  N  EW- H  A  MP  S  H  I  R  E, 

A  Capt.  Daniel  Oilman  Thomas  Patch 

JOfeph  A(iams.        Jofiah  Gilman  M.  D.  William  Pottle 
John   Gilman  John  Purmet 

B  Samuel  Goodhue        Jv  fiab  Pyper 

EZra  Barker  Griffis.  James  Pike. 

Ebenezer  Barker  A^  R 

Mofes  Boynton  D  En^nin  Jewit,     REv.  Daii.  Rogers. 

Samuel  Brown  ^ ^^ 

Jofiah  Rrown  ^    L  S 

Benj.  BianGhardjjun.  ^^Ofes  Leavltt,       tJEnry  Sherburne, 
JofliuaBoynton.  *^^  Efq;tJ.  j^m, 


R 


C  Mat.  LivermorCjEfqi  Job  Strong,  B.  A. 

Ev.  Ward  Cotton  Jonathan  Low.  Theophilus  Smith 

Wm.Cunimin£S  M  Elias  Smith 

James  Cate  R-^^*  ^^^^'^  ^^^*      Jacob  Smith. 

Nathaniel  Clement  Gregore  fer  him-  T 

Jofiah  Conant.  felf  &  30  of  hisParifh  HEnjamin  Thing  , 

D  Wilh'amMoore  ^  Jonathan  Taylor 

ZEdekiah  Drury.    Daniel  Mafoa  EdwardTaylor. 

John  Mead.  W 

E  N  /^Ol.Anri.Wiggint 

15  Ev.  Dan.  Emer-  TTHomas  Neivlns     Vj  Simon  VVig£;in? 
^^  fon  *•    JofhuaNeal.        Thomas  Wiggins 

John  Eh'ot.  P  AnJr.  Wiggins,  jan- 

G  <jOhn  Phillips, A.M.  Francis  Worceftcr. 

Gilman, Efq; 
Col.  Sam.  Gilman 


Eter  Gilman, Efqjy  Capt.  Peter  Powers 


Colony  of  RHODE-ISLAND. 

A  Nathaniel  Coegcfnail  G 

pOI.  Job  Ahny,       Thomas  CVggtihall  C  Bberezcr  Grrr 

Martha  Church  i-- Nalh.  (ircei  bii-, 

R  Henry  Cogirefha!!  H 

UErmione  Ban'fler  Jamss  Cjhwon.  W/M.  Hall^  E  q; 
*■•*  JofephBaylfv                     D  ^^      Jof.  Hvwiand. 

ConU;*nt  I-Jayley  "px  Aniel  Donbam  K 

.7  imo'hy  Balch  1--^  Jacob  Dehane.  pBenezcr  Ko=£ht., 

Hjcxandcr  Bradford.  F  ^ 

C  T^Benezer  Fifhcr  M 

':-  O'h  Campbell  ^-^  Peter  Frai.kiin.  3'-^  Avid  Moore 


Suifcrihers  Names, 

W 


Sinieon  Price.  -'•^  Jorm  Sawyer.  J  Benjamin  Wyat 

R  T  •  JohnWillfon 

TVTIlliara  Rich-  rjEnrv  Tifdale  Benj  min  VViliron 

^^         mond,  Efqj  ^*  James  Tanner.  Abigail  Wanton. 
Ichabod  Richmond                   U  Y 

Samuel  Rhodes  "D  Ev-WilliamVinal.  CAmuel  Yeats. 

Jeremiah  Rofs-  '^^  %  ^ 


T'he  Names  of  the  following  Subfcribers^  not  being  received  in  Stafon^ 
we  have  iho*t  it  proper  to  injert  them  here, 

D Avid  Burt  ThomasHibbertB.A. Thomas  Sweet 
Dr.JonathanBlifsDr.  Charles  Pynchon  Mofes  Stebbms 

Nathaniel  Burt  Rev.  John  Sergeant     Rev.  PeterThacher 

Alexander  Bolckum  Capt.  Benj,  Savage     Rev.  Benj.  Tappen 
Simon  Col  ton  So.  Cflr^/zwc.  John  Tyler 

Obadiah  Carpenter  William  Stebbins         Henry  Tolman 

William  Carpenter  Robert  Sandcrfon        Rev.Sreph.  Williams 

Thomas  Coeper  Henry  Sweet  Richard  Woolworth 

Nathaniel  Eiy  John  Sweet  Jofiah  Welman. 

Ali4GS  Dennifoa 


The  Names  of  many  ethers  who  have  fubfcribV,  are  not  yet 
come  to  Hand.  And  in  the  roregoing  Lifis,  wheie  any  Gen- 
tlemen are  mention*d  without  their  proper  Addition  or  Title, 
or  out  of  their  proper  Place,  the  Fubliftier  rely's  en  their 
Candour  to  excufe  it. 


»^gS^BPPI§|g?B^.^|||?gi 


An  Account 

of   the   Life  of 
The  Reverend 

Mr.  David  Brainerd^ 


Part     1 

From  his  Birth,  to  the  T'ime  whe7z  he  hegah 
to  devote  himfelf  to  the  Study  of  Divi- 
nity, in  order  to  his  being  fitted  for  thd 
Work  oj  the  Miniftry^ 


M 


R.  David  Bralntrd  was  horn  Jprii  20.  171^* 
at  Haddam^  a  Town  belonging  to  the  County 
of  Hartford^  in  the  Colony  of  ConneSficut^ 
New-England.  His  Father ^vvho^'itd  whcri 
this  his  Son  was  about  nine  Years  of  Age,  was 
the  Worihipful  Hezcklah  Brainerd  Efq;  an  Affiftant,  or  oftc 
of  his  Majefty-'s  Council  for  that  Colony,  and  the  Son  of  Danitl 
Brainerd  Efq;  ajufticc  of  the  Peace,  and  a  Deacon  of  theCh'jfch 
of  Chriit  in  Haddam,  His  Mother  was  Mrs.  Dorothy  Hohart^ 
Dawgbtet  to  the  Rev.  l/ir,  Jeremiah  Hob  art  ^  whopreach'da 
iR'hile  at  Topifield,  and  then  removed  to  Hmp/lead  on  Lon^- 
Jjhhdy  and  afterwards  removed  from  Hmpjiead  (  by  Reafon  ot 
Humb§rs  mmg  Quakers,  and  many  o^bws  being  fo  Irreligious, 


IS 


thi< 


2  <r;^^  LIFE         '  - 

that  they  would  <3o  nothing  towards  the  Support  of  theMlniHryJ 
and  came  and  fettled  in  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry  at  Haddam  : 
Where  he  died  in  the  85th  Year  of  his  Age  :  Of  whom  it  is 
remarkablcjthathewent  to  the  publickWorfhipin  theForenoon, 
and  died  in  his  Chair  between  Meetings.  And  this  Rev.  Gen- 
tleman was  Son  of  the  Rev.  Mr.  Peter  Hohari^  who  was,  firft, 
Minifterof  the  Gofpelat  Hingham^  io  tl>e  County  of  Norfolk  in 
England,  and  by  Reafon  of  the  Perfecution  of  the  Puritans,  re- 
moved with  his  P'amily  to  New-Engla:^d,  and  was  fettled  in  the 
Miniftry  at  Hin^ham,  in  the  Majfachujetts.  He  had  five  Sons, 
viz.  Jojhuay  Jeremiah,  Gerjhom,  Japheth,  and  Nehemiah,  His 
Son  jQf})ua  was  Minifter  at  Southol^ooLong- Iftand  ;  —Jeremiah 
was  Mr.  David  Brainerd's  Grandfather,  Minifter  at  Haddam^ 
See.  45  was  before  obferved  :  Gerfhom  was  Minifter  o^Groton  in 
ConneSficut  :  Japbeth  was  a  Phyfician,  and  went  '\n  the  Quality 
of  a  Do6tor  of  a  Ship  to  England,  (  before  theTime  for  the  tak- 
ing his  fecond Degree  atCollege  )  and  defigned  to  go  from  thente 
.tdthe  Eafi-lndiei,  and  never  was  heard  of  more  :  Nekemiahvjz^ 
fometime  Fellow  of /:^^rz;ar^  College,  and  afterwards  Minifter 
at  Newton  in  the  MaJJufhufetts.  The  Mother  of  Mrs.  Dorothy 
.  Hgbart  (  who  was  afterwards  Brainerd  )  was  Daughter  to  the 
Hev.  Mr.  Samuel  Whiting,  Minifter  of  the  Gofpel,  firftat  Boflon 
4n  Lincoln(hire,^nd  afterwards  Til  Lynn  in  the  MaJJachujetts ,NeW' 
England :  He  had  three  Sons  that  were  Minifters  of  the  Gofpel. 

.  Mr.  David  Brainerd  was  the  third  Son  of  his  Parents.  They 
liad  five  Sons  and  four  Daughters  :  Their  eldeft  Son  is  Hezekiah 
Brainerd.  Efq;  a  Juftice  of  the  Peace,  and  for  feveral  Years  pafl 
a  Reprefentative  of  theTown  of  Haddam,  in  the  GeneralAfTem- 
\>\'j  o\ ConneSficutCoXony  :  The  fecond  was  theRev.Mr.A^^^^ZKw^ 
'^praiper^^-  a  worthy  Minifter  2ki  Ea/ibury  in  Conne^icut,  who 
^difd  of  a  Confumption  Nov.  10.  1742.  The  fourth  is  Mr. 
jjohn  Brainerd,  who  fucceeds  his  Brother  David,  as  Miffionary 
to  the  Indians,  and  Paftor  of  the  fame  Church  of  Chriftian  Jn- 
■tiansii^  New-Jtrfey  ;  And  the  fifth  was  Ifrael,  lately  Student 
at  Tale-CoWcgQ  in  New- Haven,  and  died  fince  his  Brother 
JD^vid.'-'  Mrs,  Dorothy  Brainerd  having  lived  feveral  Years  a 
Widow,  died,  when  her  Son,  whofe  Life  I  am  about  to  give  an 
Account  of,  was  about  fourteen  Years  of  Age  :  So  that  in  hi?3 
Youth  he  was  left  both  Fatherlofs  and  Motherlefs.— What  Ac- 
count he  has  given  of  Himfelf,  and  his  own  Life,  may  b«  ktvi  iu 
what  fellows.  J  .    •    '• 


A..^^/.i-'i5-  ^/ ^-^D^vidB.ainerd.  AD  I732-I733-  3  \ 

T  Was,  I  think,  from  my  Youth,  fomething  Tober,  and  inclined 
-*•  rather  to  MeiancKoly,  than  the  contrary  Extreme  ;  but  don't 
yemember  any  Thing  of  ConvidUon  of  Sin,  worthy  of  Remark, 
*till  I  was,  I  believe,  about  feven  or  eight  Years  o^  Age  ;    when  I 
became  fomething  concerned   for  my  Soul,  and   terrified  at  the 
Thoughts  of  Death,  and  was  driven  to  the  Performance  of  Du- 
ties :  But  it  appeared  a  melancholy  Bufinefs,  and  dcf^royed  my       i 
Eagernefs  for  Play.     And  ala^  !   This  religiousCojicern  was  but        ' 
lliort-Iived.     However,  I  fometimes  attended  fecretPrayer ;  and 
thus  lived  at  Eafe  in  Z/Vff,  iv'ithout  Gad  in  the  IVi^fldj  and  with- 
out much  Concern,  as  I  rememb.er,  *till  1    was   above  thirteen 
Years  of  Age.     Butfomctime  in  the  Winter  1732,  I  was  feme- 
thing  roufed  out  of  carnal  Security,  by  ifcarce  know  whatMeans 
s^tfir/i  ;   but  was  much  excited   by   the  prevailing  of  a  mortal 
Sickncfs  in  Haddam  :  I  was  frequent,  conftant  and  fomething 
fervent  in  Duties,    and  took  Delight  in  reading,  efpecially  Mr. 
yaneway'i  Token  for  Children  ;  I  felt  fometimes  much  melted  in 
Duties,  and  took  great  Delight  in  thePerformance  of  'em  :  And 
I  fometimes  hoped,  that  1  was  converted,  or  atleaft  in  a  good  and 
hopeful  Way  for  Heaven   and   Happinefs,    not   knowing  what 
Converfion  was.     The  Spirit  of  God  at  this  Time  proceeded 
far  with  me  ;  I  was   remarkably   dead  to  the  World,  and  my 
Thoughts  were  almoft  wholly  employed   about   my  Squl's  Con- 
cerns ;  and  I  may   indeed  fay,  almoji  1  was  perfwaded  to  be  a 
Chrijiian.     I  was  alfo  exceedingly  diftrefTed   and   melancholy  &t 
the  Death  of  my  Mother,  in  March  1732.   But  afterwards  my 
jeligtous  Concern  began  to  decline,  and  1  by  Degrees    fell  back 
into  a  confiderable  Degree  of  Security  j    tho'   Iftill  attended 
fecrct  Prayer  frequently. 

About  the  15th  of  April  1733,  I  removed  from  my  Father*^ 
Houfe  to  Ea/i- Haddam^  where  1  fpent  four  Years,  but  l^iU 
without  God  in  thelVorld  ;  tho*  for  the  mofl  Parti  went  a  Round 
.  of  fecret  Duty.  1  was  not  exceedingly  addi6led  to  young  C(un- 
pany,  or  Frolicking  (as  it  is  called)  But  this  I  know,  that  when 
1  did  go  into  Comply,  I  never  returned  from  a  Frolick  in  my 
Life,  with  fo  good  a  Confcience  as  I  went  with  ;  It  always  add- 
ed new  Guilt  to  me,  and  made  me  afraid  to  come  to  the  Throne 
of  Graces  and  fpoilcd  thofe  good  Frames,  I  was  v^ont  furne- 
times  to  pleafe  myfelfwich.  But  alas!  all  my  good  Frames 
were  but  Self-Ri^hteou/nefs^  not  bottomed  on  a  Dcfirc  lor  tha 
Giory  of  God. 

R  2  -'^'^""i 


"^    y£'A  19-21.     21&^  LIFE       A.D.i737£^i738; 

About  thje  latter  End  of  yfpril  1737,  being  full  19  Years  of 
Age,  I  removed  to  Durham,  and  began  to  work  on  my  Farm, 
^and  fo  continued  the  Year  out,  or  near,  'till  I  was  20  Years 
old  ;  frequently  kinging,  from  a  natural  Inclination,  after  a 
liberal  Education.  When  I  was  about  twenty  Years  of  Age,  I 
applied  my  felf  to  Study  ;  and  fometime  before,  was  more  than 
ordinarily  pxcited  to  and  in  Duty  :  But  now  engaged  more  than 
ever  in  the  Duties  of  Religion.  I  became  very  ftri^,  and  watch- 
ful over  my  Thoughts,  Words,  and  Actions  ;  and  thought  I 
mufl  be  fober  indeed,  becaufe  1  defigned  to  devote  my  felf  to  the 
|v4iniftry  ;  and  imagined  I  did  dedicate  my  felf  to  the  Lord* 

Some  Time  in  ^pril  1738,  I  went  to  Mr.  Fijke's,  and  lived 
with  him,  during  his  Life.  *  And  I  remember,  He  advifed  me 
wholly  to  abandon  young  Company,  and  afTociate  myfelf  with 
grave  elderly  People  :  which  Counfel  I  followed  ;  and  my  Man^ 
per  of  Life  was  novy  exceeding  regular,  and  full  of  Religion, 
iuch  as  it  was  :  For  I  read  my  Bible  more  than  twice  through 
in  lefs  than  a  Year,  I  fpent  much  Time  every  Day  in  fecret  Pray- 
er, and  other  fecret  Duties ;  I  gave  greatAttention  to  theWord 
preached,  and  endeavoured  to  my  utmoft  to  retain  it :  So  mach 
concerned  was  I  about  Religion,  that  I  agreed  with  fome  young 
):^erfons  to  meet  privately  on  Sabbath- Evenings  for  religious  Ex- 
crcifes,  and  thought  my  felf  fincere  in  thefe  Duties  j  and  after 
our  Meeting  w;is  ended,  I  ufed  to  repeat  the  Difcourfes  of  the 
Day  to  my  felf,  and  recolle(£t  what  I  could,  tho'  fometimes  it 
'•A'as  very  late  in  the  Night.  Again,  on Mondoy- Mornings^  I  ufed 
fometimes  to  recolle6l  the  fame  Sermons.  And  I  had  fometimes 
tonfiderable  Movings  of  AfFe(f^iQns  inDuties,andmuchPieafure, 
and  had  many  Thoughts  of  joining  to  the  Church.  In  (hort,  I 
had  a  very  good  outfide,  and  reftcd  entirely  qri  my  Duties,  tho' 
1  was  not  fenfibleof  it. 

After  Mr.  /"//^^'s  Death,  I  proceeded  in  my  Learning  with- 
niy  Brother  ;  and  was  ftill  very  conftant  in  religious  Duties, and 
often  wondered  at  the  Levity  of  ProfefTors  f  'twas  a  Trouble  to 
me,  that  they  were  fo  carelcfs  in  religious  Matters.-—  Thiis  I 
proceeded  a  confiderable  Length  on  ^  Jelf -right eons  Foundation  ; 
and  (bould  have  been  entirely  ioft  and  undpne,had  not  the  mcer 
Mercy  of  God  prevented. 


t  Mr.  Ftjk^e  Wa?  th?  Pafhr  of  ^he  Church  in  Haddam. 


Mt,  2U      0/ Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1738.     5 

Some  Time  in  the  Beginnine;  of  Winter,  Jnno  i738,itp]eafed 
God,    on  one  Sabbath-day  Morning,    as  I  was  walking  out 
for  Tome  fecret  Duties  (  as  I  remember  )  to  give  me  on  a  Sudden 
fuch  a  Senfcof  my  Danger  and  the  Wrath  of  God,  that  I  ftood 
amazed,  and  my  former  good   Frames,  that  I  had  pleafed  royfelt 
with,  all  prefently  vani(hed  ;  and  from  the  View,    that  I  had  of 
my  Sin  and  Vilenefs,  I  was  much  diftrefled  all  that  Day,   fear- 
ing theVengeance  of  God  would  foon  overtake  me  \  I  was  much 
dejeded,  and  k?pt  much  alone,  and  fomstimea  begrutched  the 
Birds  and  Beafts  their  Happinefs,  becaufe  they  were  not  expofed 
to  eternal  Mifery,  as  I  evidently  faw  1  was.     And  thus  1  lived 
from  Day  to  Day, being  frequently  in  great Diftrefs :   Sometimes 
there  appeared  Mountains  before  me  to  obftruS  my  Hopes  of 
Mercy  ;   and  the   VVork   of  Converfion   appeared  fo  great,  1 
thought  I  (houid  never  be  the  Subjeft  of  it :  But  ufed,  however, 
to  pray  and  cry  to  God,  and  perform  other  Duties   with  great 
Earneftnefs,  and  hoped  by  fome  Means  to  make  theCafe  better. 
And  tho*  I  Hundreds  of  Times  renounced  all  Pretences  of  any 
IVorih  in  my  Duties  (  as  I  thought )  even  in  the  Seafon  of  tha 
Perforniance  of  them,  and  often  confefled  to  God  that  I  defer v- 
ed  nothing  for  the  wtry  beft  of  them, but  eternal  Condemnation  : 
Yet  ftill  1  had  a  fecret  latent  Hope  of  recommending  my   felf  to 
God  by  my  religious  Duties  ;  and  when  I  prayed  affedionately, 
and  my  Heart  feemed  in  fome  Meafure  to  melt,  I  hoped  God 
would  be  thereby  moved  to  pity  me,my  Prayers  then  look'd  with 
fomeAppearance  oiGoodne/s  in  'em,&  I  feemed  to  mourn  farSln  : 
and  then  I  could  in  fome  Meafure  venture  on  the  Mercy  of  God 
in  Chrift  (  as  I  tho*t ;  )  Tho*  the  preponderating  Thought  and 
Foundation  of  my  Hope  was  fome  Imagination  of  Goodne/s  in 
my  Heart  Meltings,   and  Flowing  of  AfFe6lions  in  Duty,  and 
(  fometimes)  extraordinary  Enlargements  therein,  i^c.  Tho'  at 
fome  Times  the  Gate  appearec}  fo  very  /irait^  that  it  look'd  iie^ft 
to  impoffible  to  enter,  yet  at  other  Times  I  flittered  my  felf  that 
it  was  not  fo  very  difficult,  and  hoped  I  fbould  by  Diligence  and 
Watchfulnefs  foon  gain  the  Point.     Sometimes  after  Enlarge- 
ment in  Duty  and  confiderable  Affection,   I  hoped  I  had  made  a 
good  Step  towards  Heaven,  and  imagined  that  God  was  afFefled 
as  I  was,    and  that  he  would  hear  fuch  /mare  Cries  {  as  I  called 
them)  and  fo  fometimes  when  I  withdrew  for  fecret  Duties  in 
greatDiflrefsjI  returned  fomething comfortable  ',  and  ihusheal'd 
my  klf  with  my  Duties, 

Soiiiv 


n- 


6         j^L  22.  r^  LIFE  A.  D.  1739; 


Some  Time  in  February  1738,9*  I  fet  apart  a  Day  for  feeret 
Fading  and  Prayer,  and  fpent  the  Day  in  almoft  incefTant  Cries 
to  God  for  Mercy,  that  he  would  open  my  Eyes  to  fee  the  Evil 
of  Sin,  and  the  Way  of  Life  by  Jefus  Chrift.  And  God  was 
pleafed  that  Day  to  make  confiderable  Difcoveries  of  my  Heart 
to  me  :  But  ftill  I  tru/ied'm  all  the  Duties  I  performed  ;  tho' 
there  was  no  Manner  of  Goodnefs  in  theDuties  I  then  performed^ 
there  being  no  Manner  of  Refpedl  to  theGlory  of  God  in  them, 
nor  any  fuch  Principle  in  my  Heart  :  yet  God  was  pleafed  10 
make  my  Endeavours  that  Ddiy^  a  Means  to  (hew  me  my  Help*- 
lejmefs  in  fome  Meafure. 

Sometimes  I  was  greatly  encouraged^  and  imagin'd  that  God 

loved  me  and  was  pleafed  with  me,  and  thought  I  ftiould  fooa 

be  fully  reconciled  to  God  ;  while  the  Whole  was  founded  on 

nicer  Prefumption^  aiifing  from  Enlargement  in  Duty,  or  FJow^ 

ing  of  Affections,  or  fome  good  Refolutions,  and  the  like.    And 

xvhen,  at  Times,  great  Diftrefs  began  to  arife,  on  a  Sight  of  my 

Vilenefs  and  Nakednefs,  and  Inability  to  deliver  my  felt  from  a 

i'overeign  God,  I  ufed  to  put  off*  the  Difcovery,  is  what  I  could 

not  bear.     Once,  I  remember,  a  terrible  Pang  of  Diftrefs  feized 

nie,  and  the  Thoughts  of  renouncing   my  Self,    and  ftanding 

naked  before  God,  ftripped  of  all  Goodnefs,  were  fo  dreadful 

to  me,  that  I  was   ready  to  fay  to  'era  as  Felix  to  Pauly   Go  th^ 

TVay  for  this  Time.     Thus,  tho'  I  daily  long*d  for  greater  Con- 

vidion  of  Sin,  fuppoung  that  I  muft  fee  more  of  my  dreadful 

Slate  in  order  to  a  Remedy,  yet  when  the  Difcoveries  of  my 

vile  hellifh  Heart  were  made  to  me,  the  Sight  was  fo  dreadful, 

and  fbewed  me  (o  plainly  my  Expofednefs  to  Damnation,  that 

I  could   not  endure  it.—-  I  conftantly  ftrove    after   whatever 

^alificattGnSy  I  imagined  others  obtained  before  the  Reception 

of  Chrift,  in  order  to  recommend  me  to  his  Favour.     Sometimes 

I   felt  the  Power  of  an  hard  Heart,  and  fuppofed  it  muft  be 

foften^d  before  Chrift  would  accept  of  me  ;  and   when  I   felt 

any   Meltings  of  Heart,  I  hoped   now  the  Work  was  almoft 

done :  And   hence,    when   my  Diftrefs  ftill  remained,  I   was 

wont  to  murmur   at  God's  Dealings  with  me  ;  and   thought, 

when  others   felt  their  Hearts  foftened,   God   (hewed    them 

Mercy  :    But  my  DiiU-efs  remained  ftill. 

Sometimes  I  grew  rem'ifi  z^^jluggip),  without  any  great  Con- 
vi£lians  of  Sin,  for  a  confiderable  Time  together  ;  bux  after 
fuch  a  Seafon,  ConviSliom  fometimes  feized  me  more  violently. 
One  Night  I  remember  in  particular,  when  I  was  walking 
i4>iit^rily  Abroad,  {  had  open'd  to  ins  fuch  a  View  of  my  Sin^that 

I 


'JEt.22:      ^/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1739;    7 

I  feared  the  Ground  would  cleave  afunder  under  my  Feet,  and 
become  my  Grave,  and  fend  my  Soul  quick  into  Hell,  before 
i  could  get  Home.  And  tho'  I  was  forced  to  go  to  Bed  left 
my  Diftrefs  (hould  be  difcovcred  by  others,  which  I  much 
feared  ;  yet  I  fcarce  durft  Sleep  at  all,  for  I  thought  it  would  be 
a  great  Wonder  if  I  (hould  be  out  of  Hell  in  the  Morning, 
And  tho'  my  Diftrefs  was  fometimes  thus  great,  yet  I  greatly 
dreaded  the  lofs  of  Convidions,  and  returning  back  to  a  State 
of  carnal  Security,  and  to  my  former  Infenfibility  of  impending 
Wrath  ;  which  made  me  exceeding  exa6t  in  my  Behaviour, 
left  I  {hould  ftifle  the  Motions  of  God's  Spirit.  When  at  any 
Time  I  took  a  View  of  my  Conviaions  of  my  own  Sinfulnefs, 
and  thought  the  Degree  of  'em  to  be  confiderable,  I  was  wont 
to  truft  in  my  Convidtions  :  But  this  Confidence,  and  the  Hopes 
that  arofe  in  me  from  it,  of  foon  making  fome  notable  Ad- 
vances towards  Deliverance,  would  eafe  my  Mind,  and  I  fooa 
became  more  fenfelefs  and  remifs  :  But  then  again,  when  £ 
difcerned  my  Convi61ions  to  grow  languid,  and  £  tho*t  them 
about  to  leave  me,  this  immediately  alarmed  and  diftre/Ted  me. 
Sometimes  I  expe<3ed  to  take  a  large  Step,  and  get  very  far  to- 
wards Converfion,  by  fome  particular  Opportunity  or  Means 
I  had  in  View. 

The  many  Difappointments,  and  great  DiftrefTes  and  Per-*- 
plexity  I  met  with,  put  me  into  a  moft  horrible  Frame  of  lon-^ 
tefiing  with  the  Almighty;  with  an  inward  Vehemence 
and  Virulence,  finding  Fault  with  his  Ways  of  Dealing  with 
Mankind.  I  found  great  Fault  with  the  Imputation  of  AdanC% 
Sin  to  his  Pofterity  :  And  my  wicked  Heart  often  wifhed  for 
fome  other  Way  of  Salvation,  than  by  Jefus  Chri/i  :  And  being 
iih  the  troubled  Sea,  and  my  Thdljghts  confufed,  {  ukd  to  con- 
trive to  efcape  the  Wrath  of  God  by  fome  other  Means,  and 
had  ftrange  ProjecStlons,  full  of  Atheifm,  contriving  to  difappoint 
God's  Defigns  and  Decrees  concerning  me,  or  to  efcape  God's 
Notice,  and  hide  myfelf  from  him  :  But  when,  upon  Reflec- 
tion, I  faw  thefe  Projections  were  vain,  and  would  no^fcrvfc 
niGi,  and  that  I  could  contrive  nothing  for  my  own  Relief,  tb^ 
would  throw  my  Mind  into  the  moft  horrid  Frame,  to  wifh 
there  was  no  God,  or  to  wifh  there  were  fome  other  God  that 
could  controul  him,  t5?c.  Thefe  Thoughts  and  Defires  Were 
the  fecret  Inclinations  of  my  Heait,  that  were  frequently 
'■&€i\ng  before  1  was  aware 'y  but  alas,  they  were  mine!  AUho* 
I  was  affrighted  with  them,  when  [  came  to  refle<5l  on  them  : 
When  I  coufidcred  ©f  it,  it  diftreilcd  me,  to  chink,  that  mv 

HeaTt 


S      JBl  It.  ri^  L I F  E  A.D.  17 j^: 

Heart  was  (o  full  of  Enmity  againfl  Gcd ;  and  it  made  mc 
tremble,  left  God*s  Vengeance  fliculd  fuddenly  fall  upon  me* 
I  ufed  before,  to  imagine  my  Heart  was  not  fo  bad,  as  the 
Scriptures  and  fome  other  Books  reprefchted.  Sometimes  £ 
wfed  to  take  much  Pains  to  work  It  up  into  a  good  Frame, 
a  humble  fubmiflive  Difpofition  ;  and  hoped  there  was  then 
fomeGoodnefs  in  me  :  But  it  may  be  on  a  fuddenithe  Thoughts 
of  the  Stridnefe  of  the  Law,  or  the  Sovereignty  of  God,  would 
fo  irritate  the  Corruption  of  my  Heart,  that  I  had  fo  watched 
pver,  and  hoped  I  had  brought  to  a  good  Frame,  that  it 
would  break  over  all  Bounds,  and  burft  forth  on  all  SideSj 
like  Floods  of  Waters,  when  they  break  down  their  Damm. 
But  being  fenfibleof  the  Neceffityof  a  deep  Humiliation  in 
©rder  to  a  faving  Clofe  with  Chrift,  1  ufed  to  fet  my  felf  to  work  . 
in  my  own  Heart  ihokConvi^ionSy  that  were  requisite  in  fuch  an 
Humiliation  :  As,  a  Conviction,  that  God  would  be  juft,  if  he 
caft  me  off  for  ever :  And  that  if  ever  God  (hould  beftowMer- 
cy  on  me,  it  would  be  meer  Grace,  tho*  Ifhould  be  in  Diftrefs 
many  Years  firft,  and  be  never  fo  much  engaged  in  Duty  5  that 
God  was  not  in  the  leaft  obliged  to  pity  me  the  more  for  all  paft 
X)uties,  Cries,  and  Tears,  t^c.  Thefe  Things  I  flrove  to  my 
iitmoft  to  bring  my  felf  to  a  firm  belief  of,  and  hearty  aiTentto  ; 
3nd  hoped  that  now  I  was  brought  off  from  my  felf,  and  truly 
humbled  and  bowed  to  the  divine  Sovereignty  5  and  was  wont 
to  tell  God  in  my  Prayers,  that  now  I  had  thofe  veryDifpofitions 
of  Soul  that  he  required,  and  on  which  he  (hewed  Mercy  to 
others,  and  thereupon  to  beg  and  plead  for  Mercy  tome:  But 
when  1  found  no  Relief,  and  was  ftill  oppreffed  with  Guilt  and 
J  ears  of  Wrath,  my  Soul  was  in  a  Tumult,  and  my  Heart  rofe 
againft  God, as  dealing  hardly  with  me.  Yet  then  myConfcicncc 
Hew  in  my  Face,  putting  me  in  Mind  of  my  late  Confeffion  t0 
God  of  his  Jufticein  my  Condemnation,  t5fc.  And  this,  giving 
me  a  Sight  of  the  Badnefs  of  my  Heart,  threw  me  again  into 
Diftrefs,  and  I  wifhed  I  had  watched  my  Heart  more  narrowly, 
to  keep  it  from  breaking  out  againftGod*sDealings  with  me, and 
1  even  wifhed  1  had  not  pleaded  for  Mercy  on  Account  of  my 
Humiliation,  becaufe  tiiereby  1  had  loft  all  my  feeming  Good- 

Thus,  Scores  of  Times,  I  vainly  imagined  my  felf  humbled 
and  prepared  for  faving  Mercy. 

While  1  was  in  this  diftrefl'ed,  bewildered,  and  turaultuou* 
State  of  Mind,  the  Corruption  of  my  Heart  was  efpecially  irri'^ 
taitd  With  ihcfc  Things  Mlowing  ; 


^/.  22."    ^/ Mr.  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.i 


739- 


1.  The  Jfrii^ne/i  of  the  dmne  Law,  For  I  found  it  was  im- 
poffible  for  me  (after  my  utmoftPains)  to  anfwer  theDemands  of 
it.  I  often  made  new  Refolutions,  and  as  often  broke  them.  I 
imputed  the  whole  to  Carelefnefs,  and  the  Want  of  being  more 
Watchful,  and  ufed  to  call  my  felf  a  Fool  for  my  Negligence  i 
But  wheM>  upon  a  ftronger  Refolution,  and  greater  Endeavours, 
and  dole  Application  of  my  felf  to  Fafting  and  Prayer,  I  found 
all  Attempts  fail,  then  I  quarrelled  with  the  Law  of  God,  as 
unreafonably  rigid.  I  thought,  if  it  extended  only  to  my  out- 
Ward  Adions  andBchaviours,  I  could  bear  with  it  :  But  1  found 
it  condemned  me  for  my  evil  Thoughts,  and  Sins  of  my 
Heart,  which  I  could  not  pcflibly  prevent.  I  was  extreamly 
loth  to  give  out,  and  own  my  utter  Helplefnefs  in  this  Matter  : 
But  after  repeated  Difappointments,  thought  that,  rather  than 
perifh,  I  could  do  a  little  more  ftill,  efpecially  if  fuch  and  fuch 
Circuiijftances  might  but  attend  my  Endeavours  and  Strivings  ; 
I  hoped,  that  I  fhould  ftrive  more  earneflly  than  ever,  if  the 
Matter  came  to  Extremity  (  iho'  I  never  could  find  the  Time  to 
do  my  utm -H-jin  the  Manner  I  intended  :)  And  this  Hope  of  fu- 
ture more  favourable  Circun^ftances,  and  of  dojng  fomcthing 
great  hereaiter,  kept  me  /rem  urterDefpair  in  my  felf,  and  from 
feeing  my  felt  fallen  into  the  Hands  ot  a  fovereign  Cjod,  and 
dependent  on  nothing  but  free  and  boundlefs  Grace. 

t.  Another  Thing  was,  that  Faith  alone  was  the  Condition  of 
Salvation  ;  and  that  God  would  not  come  down  to  lowerTewns, 
that  he  would  not  promife  Life  and  Salvation  upon  my  fincere 
and  hearty  Prayers  and  Endeavours,  That  Word,  Mark  xvi.  i6» 
Hi  that  beiteveth  not,  /hall  be  damned^  cut  ofF  all  Hope  there  : 
And  1  found.  Faith  was  the  fovereign  Gift  of  God  \  that  I 
could  not  get  it  as  of  my  felf,  and  could  not  obligeGod  to  beftow 
it  upon  me,  by  any  of  my  Performances.  (  Eph.  ii.  i,  &  8.  ) 
l^his^  I  was  ready  to  fay,  is  a  hard  Sayings  who  can  hear  it  ?  I 
could  not  bear, that  all  1  had  donelhould  ftand  for  meer  nothing, 
who  had  been  very  Confciencious  in  Duty ,  and  had  been  ex« 
needing  religious  a  great  while,  and  had  (  as  f  thought  )  done 
much  more  than  many  others  that  had  obtained  Mercy.  I  con* 
fef^'d  indeed  the  Vilenefs  of  my  Duties  ;  but  then,  what  made 
'em  at  that  Time  feem  vile,  was  my  wandring  Thoughts  ire 
them  ;  not  becaufe  {  was  all  over  cefiled  like  a  Devil,  and 
the  Principle  corrupt  from  whence  they  flowed,  fo  that  1  could 
not  p'jffibly  do  any  Thing  that  was  Good.  And  thtreforc  I 
called  wnat  I  did,  by  the  Nime  of  honeft  faithful  Endeavcurs; 
and  could  n^t  b«ar  it,tha<God  had  made  ngPrgmifcs  of  Salvation 
tOLifejja.  C  3'  Anoiber 


to      Ml  22:         21^^  L  I  F  E         A.D.  1739; 

3.  Another  Thing  was,  that  1  could  not  find  out  what  Fahh 
was  ;  or  what  it  was  to  believe,  and  come  to  Chriji,  \  read  the 
Calls  of  Chrift,  made  to  the  weary  and  heavy  laden  ;  but  could 
iind  no  J^f^ay^  that  he  dirc6led  them  to  come  in.  I  thought,  I 
would  gladly  come,  if  1  knew  hoWy  tho*  the  Path  of  Duty 
diredted  to  were  never  fo  difficult.  I  read  Mr.  Stoddard's 
Guide  to  Chriji  (which  I  truft  was,  in  the  Hand  of  God,  the 
happy  Means  of  my  Converfion  )  And  my  Heart  rofe  againft  the 
Author ;  for  tho*  he  told  me  my  very  Heart  all  along  under 
Convldions,  and  feem'd  to  be  very  beneficial  to  me  in  his  Di- 
redlions  ;  yet  here  he  fail'd.  He  did  not  tell  me  any  Thing  I 
could  do,  that  would  bring  me  to  Chrift,  but  left  me  as  it  were 
with  a^  great  Gulf  between  me  and  Chrift,  without  any  Directi- 
on to  get  through.  For  I  was  not  yet  effe6lually  and  experi- 
mentally taught,  that  there  could  be  no  Way  prefer ibed,  where- 
by a  natural  Man  could,  of  his  own  Strength,  obtain  that  which 
is  fupernatural,  and  which  the  higheft  Angel  cannot  give. 

4.  Another  Thing  that  I  found  a  great  inward  Oppofition  to, 
was  the  Sovereignty  of  God.  I  could  not  bear,  that  it  (Uould  be 
wholly  at  God's  Pleafure,  to  fave  or  damn  me,  juft  as  he  would. 
That  Pafiage,  Rom.AX.  1 1  ,—23.  was  a  conftant  Vexation  to  me, 
efpeclally /^^r//?  21.  The  reading  or  meditating  on  this  always 
deftroyed  my  feeming  good  Frames  :  When  1  thought  I  was 
almoft  humbled,  and  almoft  refigned  to]  God*s  Sovereignty,  the 
reading  or  thinking  on  this  Pail'age  would  make  my  Enmity 
againft  the  Sovereignty  of  God  appear.  And  when  I  came  to 
rtfle<5t  on  my  inv^ard  Enmity  and  Blafphemy,  that  arofe  on 
this  Occafion,  I  was  the  more  afraid  of  God,  and  driven  further 
from  any  Hopes  of  Reconciliation  with  him  ;  and  it  gave  me- 
fuch  a  dreadful  View  of  my  felf,  that  I  dreaded  more  than  ever 
jo  fee  myfcifinGod's  Hands, and  at  his  fovereign  Difpofal,  and  it 
tn^de  me  more  oppofite  than  ever  to  fubmit  to  his  Sovereignty  j 
for  I  thoui^ht  God  deHgned  my  Damnation.— 

Ail  this  Time  the  Spirit  of  God  was  powerfully  at  work  with? 
ine  ;  and  I  was  inwardly  prcfTed  to  relinquifh  ail  Self- Confidence i" 
pll  Hopes  of  ever  helping  mv  felf  by  any  Means  whatfoever  : 
if^nd  the  Convidion  of  my  hji  Eftatc  was  fometimes  fo  clear  and 
nianifcft  before  my  Eyes,  that  it  was  as  if  it  bad  beer  declared  to 
rne  in* /o  many  Words,  "  'Tis  done,  'tis  done,  'tis  forever -im- 
poiBble  to  deliver  your  felf. "  For  about  three  or  four  Days,  thy 
Soul  was  thus  diftrefied,  trpecially  at  fonie Turns,  wji^-  for  at- 
Monicnuifeenv^dito  «)>''fdf  l^ft  an4  undone  ^i^&trt  tht-rt 


'JEi,iz\      «/ M*.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1739.    n 

Would  ftirmk  back  immediately  from  the  Sight,   becaufe  I  dared 
not  venture  my  felf  into  the  Hands  of  God,  as  wholly  helplefs, 
and  at   the  Difpofal   of  his  fovereign  PJeafure.     I  dared  not  fee 
that  important  Truth  concerning  my   felf,  That  I  was  ^tW/« 
TrefpaJJes  and  Sins,  But  when  I  had  as  it  were  thruft  away  thefc 
Views  of  my  felf  at  any  Time,  I  felt  diflrefled  to  have  the  fame 
Difcoveries  of  my  felf  again ;    for  I  greatly  feared  being  given 
overof  God  to   final  Stupidity.     When  I  thought  of  putting  it 
off  to  a  more  convenient  Seofon^  the  Convi<5tion  was  fo  clofe  and 
powerful  with  Regard  f.o  the  prefent   Time,    that  it    was    the 
beft  Time,  and  probably  the  only  Time,   that  I  dared  not  put  it 
ofF.     It  was  the  Sight  of  Truth  concerning  my  felf,    Truth  \t(' 
pedling  my  State,  as  a  Creature  fallen  and  alienated  from  God, 
and  that  confequently  could  makenoDemands  onGod  for  Mercy, 
but  muft  fubfcribe  to  the  abfolute  Sovereignty  of  the  divine  Be- 
ing ;  the  Sight  of  the  Truths  I  fay,  my  Soul  fhrank  away  from, 
and  trembled  to  think  of  beholding.   Thus,  he  that  doth  Evil  (as 
all  unregenerate  Men  continually  do  )  hates  the  Light  of  Truths 
i^either  cares  to  come  to  it,  becaufe  it  will  reprove  his  Deeds,  and 
ftiew  him  his  juft  Deferts.    (  Joh.  iii.20.)  And  tho%  ibme  Time 
before,  I  had  taken  much  Pains  (  as  I  thought )  to  fubmit  to  the 
Sovereignty  of  God,  yet  I  miftook  theThing  ;  and  did  not  once 
imagine,  that  feeing  and  being  made  experimentally  fenfible  of 
this  Truth,  which  my  Soul  now  fo  much  dreaded  and  trembled 
at  a  Senfe  of,  was  the  Frame  of  Soul  that  I  had  been  fo  ear- 
neft  in  purfuit  of  heretofore  :  For  I  had  ever  hoped,  that  when 
I  had  attained  to  that  Humiliation,  which  I  fuppofed  neceflary  to 
go  before  Faith,  then  it  would  not  be  fair  forGod  to  caji  me  off\, 
but  now  I  faw  it  was  fo  far  from  any  Goodnefs  in  me,  to  own 
my  felf  fpiritually  dead,  and   deftitute  of  all  Goodnefs,  that,  on 
the  contrary,   my  Mouth  would  be  forever /?<?/> V  by  it  ;    and  it 
look'd  as  dreadful  to  me,  to  fee  my  felf,and  the  Relation  I  flood 
in  to  God,  as  a  Sinner  and  a  Criminal,  and  he  a  great  Judge  and 
Sdverei^n^  as  it  would  be  to  a  poor  trembling  Creature,  to  ven- 
ture ofFfome  high  Precipice.     And  hence  I  put  it  off  for  a  IVIi-j 
nute  or  two,  and  tried  for  better  Circumftances  to  do  it  in'iMji^ 
ther  I  muft  read  a  PafTage  or  two,  or  pray  fird,  or  f^methingof 
the  like  Nature  ;  or  elfe  put  ofF  my  Submiflion  to  God's  Sove- 
reignty, with  an  Objedion,  that  I  did  not  know  how  to  fubaiit;. 
But  the  Truth  was,  I  could  fee  no  Safety  in  owning  my  felf  m 
the  Hands  of  a  Sovereign  God,  and  that  I  could  lay  no  Claim  t@ 
7  Thing  better  than  Damiiation. 

C  a  P^^^ 


li    muii.         T/^^  LIFE  A.  D.  1-39: 

But  after  a  confiderable  Time  fpent  in  fuch  Uke  Exercifes  and 
Diftrefles,  oneMorning,  while  I  was  walking  in  a  folitary  Place 
as  ufual,  I  at  once  faw  that  ail  my  Contrivances  and  Proje£lions 
to  effedt  or  procure  Deliverance  and  Salvation  for  mv  felf,  were 
utterly  in  vain  :  I  was  brought  quite  to  a  ft^nd,  as  finding  my 
felf  totally  loft.  I  had  thought  many  Times  before,  that  the 
Difficulties  in  mv  Way  were  very  great  :  But  now  I  faw,  in  ano- 
ther and  very  different  Light,  that  it  was  forever  irnpoffible  for 
mc  to  do  any  Thing  towards  helping  or  delivering  my  felf.  I 
then  thought  of  blaming  my  felf,  that  I  had  not  done  more,  and 
been  more  engaged,  while  I  hadOpportunity  ( fbr  it  feemed  now 
as  if  the  Seafon  of  doing  was  forever  over  and  gone  )  But  I  in- 
ftantly  faw,  that  let  me  have  done  what  ]  would,  it  would  no 
more  have  tended  to  my  helping  my  felf ;  than  what  I  had  done  ; 
that  I  had  made  all  the  Pleas,  1  ever  could  have  made  to  all 
Eternity  ;  and  that  all  my  Pleas  were  vain.  The  Tumult  that 
had  been  before  in  my  Mind,  was  now  quieted ;  and  I  was  feme- 
thing  eafed  of  that  Diftrefs,  which  I  felt,  while  flruggling  a- 
gainfta  Sight  of  my  felf,  and  of  the  divine  Sovereignty.  I  had 
the  greateft  Certainty,  that  my  State  was  forever  miferable,  for 
all  that  i  could  do  ;  and  wondered,  and  was  almoft  aftonifaed, 
ihat  I  had  never  been  fenfible  of  it  before. 

In  the  Time  while  I  remainM  in  this  State,  my  'Notlom  ref- 
pc^ting  my -D«//^;,  were  quite  different  from  what  I  had  ever 
entertained  in  Times  pafh  Before  this,  the  more  I  did  in  Duty, 
the  more  I  thought  God  was  obliged  to  me  ;  or  at  leait  the 
more  hard  I  thought  it  would  be  for  God  to  caft  me  ofF  ;  ^ho 
at  the  fame  Time  I  confefled,  and  thought  I  faw,  th^t  tlieie  was 
no  Goodnefs  or  Merit  in  my  Duties  :  But  now  the  morel  did 
in  Pfaycr  or  any  other  Duty,  the  more  I  faw  f  was  indebted  to 
God  for  allowing  me  to  afk  for  Mercy  ;  For  I  faw,  it  was  Sclf- 
Intereft  had  led  me  to  pray,  and  that  I  had  never  once  prayed 
from  any  Refpe(Sl  to  the  Glory  of  God.  Now  1  faw,  there  was 
\\o  neceffary  Conne6iion  between  my  Prayers  and  the  Beftow- 
iiiCnt  of  divine  Mercy  ;  that  they  laid  not  the  leaft  Obligation 
upon  God  to  beflow  his  (jrace  upon  me  ;  and  that  there  was 
jio  more  Vertiie  or  Goodnefs  in  them,  than  there  would  be  m 
xny  jy^ddling  with  my  Hand  in  the  Water  (  which  was  the  Com- 
parifo.'i  i  had  then  in  my  Mind)  and  this  becaufe  they  were  not 
performed  frorn  any  Love  or  Regard  to  Cjod.  I  faw,  that  Ihad 
been  heaping  up  my  Devotions  before  God,  F^a  fling.  Praying  c^j^^^ 
jtr^endin^,  4nd  jnd^^d  really  thinking,  at  fome  TimeSi  that  I 


JEL2.1.      r/ilfr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1739.     ^3 

was  aiming  at  the  Glory  of  God  ;  whereas  T  never  once  truly 
intended  it,  but  only  my  own  Happinefs.  I  faw,  that,  as  I  had 
never  done  any  Tb'xngfor  God,  I  had  no  Claim  to  lay  to  any 
Thing  from  him,  but  Perdition,  on  Account  of  my  Hypocrify 
and  Mockery.  Oh  how  different  did  my  Duties  now  appear 
from  what  they  ufed  to  do  !  I  ufed  to  charge  them  with  Sin  and 
Imperfcdtion  ;  But  this  was  only  onAccount  of  the  Wandrings 
and  vain  Thoughts  attending  them,  and  not  becaufe  I  had  no 
Regard  to  God  in  them  ;  for  this  I  thought  I  had  :  But  when 
I  faw  evidently  that  1  had  Regard  to  nothing  but  Self-Intereft, 
then  they  appeared  vile  Mockery  of  God,  Sclf-Worfhip,  and  a 
continual  Courfe  of  Lies ;  fo  that  I  (aw  now,  there  was  fome- 
thing  worfe  had  attended  my  Duties,  than  barely  a  few  Wan- 
drings &c.  For  the  whole  was  nothing  but  Self-Worfhip  and 
an  horrid  Abufe  of  God. 

I  continued,  as  I  remember,  in  this  State  of  Mind,  from  Fri- 
day-Morning 'till  the  Sabbath-Evening  following, ya/y  1 2.  1739. 
when  I  was  walking  again  in  the  fame  folitary  Place  where  £ 
was  brought  to  fee  my  felf  loft  and  helplefs  (  as  was  before  men- 
tioned j  and  here,  in  a  mournful  melancholy  State,  was  attempt- 
ing to  pray  ;  but  found  noHeart  to  engage  in  that,  or  any  other 
Duty  ;  my  former  Concern  and  Exercife  and  religious  AfFe<5li- 
ons  were  now  gone.  I  thought, the  Spirit  of  God  had  quite  left 
me  ',  but  ftill  was  not  diftrefled  :  Yet  difconfolate,  as  if  there 
was  nothing  in  Heaven  or  Earth  could  naake  me  happy.  And 
having  been  thus  endeavouring  to  pray  (tho*  being,  as  I  thought, 
very  ftupid  and  fenfelefs )  for  near  half  an  Hour,  (and  by  this 
Time  the  Sun  was  about  half-an-hour-high,  as  I  remember  ) 
then,  as  I  was  walking  in  a  dark  thick  Grove,  unfpeakable  Glory 
feemed  to  open  to  the  View  and  Apprehenfion  of  my  Soul :  I 
don't  mean  any  external  Brightnefs,  for  I  faw  no  fuch  Thing, 
ijor  do  I  intend  any  Imagination  of  a  Body  of  Light,  fome 
where  away  in  the  third  Heavens,  or  any  Thing  of  thatNaturc  ; 
but  it  was  a  new  inward  Apprehenfion  or  View  that  I  had  of 
(3OD,  fuch  as  I  never  had  before,  nor  any  Thing  which  had  rhe 
leaft  Refemblance  of  it.  I  flood  flill,  and  wonder'd  and  ad- 
mired !  I  knew  that  1  never  had  feen  before  any  Thing  com- 
parable to  it  for  Excellency  and  Beauty :  It  was  widely  different 
from  2l]\  theConceptions,that  ever  I  had  had  of  God,  orThings 
•divine.  I  had  no  particular  Apprehenfion  of  any  one  Pcrfonin 
^e  Trinity,  cither  the  Father,  the  Son,  or  the  Holy  Gboft  : 
^'>i  it  appeared  to  be  divm  Gkry^  that  I  then  beheld  :  Ahd  my 

S.oni 


Soul  rejoyced  with  Joy  unfpeakable^  to  fee  fuch  a'GoD,  fuch  a 
glorious  divine  Being  ;  and  I  was  inwardly  pleafed  and  faiisfied, 
that  he  fhould  be  God  ever  all  forever  and  ever.  My  Soul  was 
fo  captivated  and  dehghted  with  the  Excellency,  Loveliners, 
Greatnefs,  and  other  Ferfeflions  of  God,  that  I  was  even 
fvtrallowed  up  in  Him  ;  at  lead  to  that  Degree,  that  I  had  no 
Thought  ( as  I  remember)  at  ^r^,  about  my  own  Salvation, 
and  fcarce  refleded  there  was  fuch  a  Creature  as  my  felf. 

ThusGod,  I  truft, brought  me  to  a  hearty Difpofition  to  "-aft 
htmy  and  fet  him  on  the  Throne,  and  principally  and  ultimately 
to  aim  at  his  Honour  and  Glory,  as  King  of  the  Univerfe. 

I  continued  in  this  State  of  inv.'ard  Joy  and  Peace,  yet 
Aftonifhment,  'till  nearDark,  without  any  fenfible  Abatement,' 
and  then  began  to  think  and  examine  what  I  had  feen  ;  and 
felt  fwcetly  compofed  in  my  Mind  all  the  Evening  following  : 
I  fejt  myfelf  in  a  new  World,  and  every  Thing  about  me  ap- 
peared with  a  different  Afpedl  from  what  it  was  v/ont  to  do. 
'  At  this  Time,  the  IVay  of  Salvation  opened  to  me  with  fuch 
infinite  Wifdom,Suitablenefs  and  Excellency,  that  I  wondered 
I  fhould  ever  think  of  any  other  Way  of  Salvation  ;  was  a- 
liiazed,  that  I  had  not  drop'd  my  own  Contrivances,  and  com- 
plied with  this  lovely  blcfTdd  and  excellent  Way  before.  If  I 
could  have  been  faved  by  my  own  Duties,  or  any  other  Way 
that  I  had  formerly  contrived,  my  whole  Soul  would  now  have 
refufed.  I  wonder  *d,  that  all  the  World  did  not  fee  and  comply 
with  this  Way  of  Salvation,  intirely  by  the  Right eoujnefs  of 
Chri/f, 

The  fweet  Relifh  of  what  I  then  felt,  continued  with  me 
f6r  feveral  Days,  almoft  conftantly,  in  a  greater  or  lefsDegree : 
I  could  not  but  fweetly  rejoyce  in  God,  lying  down  and  ri- 
fing  up.  The  next  Lords- Day  I  felt  fomething  of  the  fame 
K-nd  ;  the'  not  fo  powerful  as  before.  But,  not  long  after," 
was  again  involved  in  thick  Darknefs.zi^d  under  great  Diflrefs  : 
yet  not  of  the  fame  Kind  with  my  Diftrefs  under  Convidlions, 
I  was  guilty,  afraid  and  afhamed  to  come  before  God,  was 
exceedingly  prefsM  with  a  Senfe  of  Guilt :  But  it  was  not  long 
before  I  felt  ( I  truft )  true  Repentance  and  Joy  in  God. 

About  the  latter  End  of  Auguft^  I  again  fell  under  great  Dark- 
nefs  ;  It  feem'd  as  if  the  Prefence  of  God  vtz^  clean  gene  forever* 
Tho'  I  was  not  fo  much  diflreifed  about  my  fpiritual  State,  as  I 
was  at  my  being  fhut  out  from  God's  Prefence,  as  I  then.fenfi- 
bly  was.  But  it  pleafed  the  Lord  to  return  gracioufly  to  VM^ 
not  long  after.  .  •     . :  V  '     ; 


^/.  22,23.    c/ Mr.  David Brainerd.     A.D.1739;    '5 

In  the  Beginning  of  Septmhrlwent  to  College  %,  and  entred 
there :  But  with  Tome  Degree  of  Reluaancy, fearing  left  I  {bould 
not  be  able  to  lead  a  Life  of  ftridt  Religion,  in  the  midft  of  (o 

many  Temptations After  this,  in  the  Vacancy,  before  I 

went  to  tarry  at  College,  it  pleafed  God  (o  vifu  mv  Soul  with 
clearer  Manifeftations  of  himfelf  and  his  Grace.  I  was  fpending 
fomeTime  in  Prayer, &  Self-Examination  ;  and  the  Lord  by  his 
Grace  (o  (hined  into  my  Heart,  that  {  enjoyed  full  Aflurancc 
of  hib  Favour,  for  that  Time  ;  and  my  Soul  was  unfpeakably 
refrefhed  with  divine  and  heavenly  Enjoyments.  At  this  Time 
efpecially,  as  well  as  fome  others,  fundry  PafTages  of  God's 
Word  o^tii\^  to  my  Soul  v/ith  divine  Clearnefs,  Power  and 
Sweetnefs,  foasto  appear  exceeding  precious,  and  with  clear 
and  certain  Evidence  of  it's  being  the  IVord  of  God.  I  enjoy'd 
confiderable  Sweetnefs  in  Religion  all  the  Winter  following. 

In  Jan.  1739,40.  The  Meapi  fpread  much  in  College  ;  and 
I  having  taken  theDiflempsr,  went  home  to  Haddam :  But  fome 
Days  before  I  was  taken  Sick,  I  feem'd  to  bs  greatly  deferted, 
and  my  Soul  mourned  the  Abfence  of  the  Comforter  exceeding- 
ly :  It  feem'd  to  me,  all  Comfort  was  forever  gone;  I  pray'd 
and  cried  to  God  for  H^Jp,  yet  found  no  prcfent  Comfort  or 
Relief.  But  thro' divine  Goodnefs,  a  Night  or  two  before  I 
was  taken  III,  while  [  was  walking  alone  in  a  very  retired  Place, 
and  engaged  in  Meditation  and  Prayer,  I  enjoyed  a  fweet  re- 
frefhing  Vifit,  as  1  truf}:,  from  above,  fo  that  my  Soul  was  raifed 
far  above  the  Fears  oi  Death  y  indeed  [rather  longed  forDeath^ 
than  feared  it.  O  how  much  more  refrefhing  this  one  Ssafom 
wa-,  than  all  the  Pleafures  and  Delights  that  Earth  can  afFjrd  ] 
After  a  D^y  or  two  f  was  taken  with  the  Meafles,  and  was  very 
111  indeed,  fo  that  I  almoit  defpaired  of  Life:  Bwt  had  no  dif- 
trefTinsj  Fears  of  Death  at  all.  However  thro'  divine  Goodnef$ 
i  foon  recovered  :  Yet,  by  Reafon  oi  hard  and  clofe  Studies,  and 
bemsj  much  expofed  on  Account  of  my  Frefiiman-fhip,  1  had 
but  little  Time  for  fpiritual  Duties  ;  my  Soul  often  mourned  for 
V/ant  of  more  Time  and  Opportunity  to  be  alone  with  God^ 
Iq  the  Spring  and  Summer  following  I  h^d  better  Ao^van^age* 
for  Retirement,  and  enjoyed  more  Comfort  m  Religion,: '  Tho^ 
indeed  my  Ambition  in  mv  Studies  greatly  wrongqd  the  Actr/|f<r 
and  Vigour  of  m*  fpiritual  Life  :  '^Yit  this  w.^is  ufuaily  the  <^r« 
vvnh  me,  that  in  the  Multitude  of my^htfughts  within  ?«>,  tyid-^j. 
Cc--^r^rfs  onnclpiWy  delighted  my  Scul :  Thefc  v/ere  my  grearcft 
1'     "^    i:>nsDay  by  Day. 

C'.^i.le^c  in  Neix;- Haven.  ®'i« 


:x6    JEt.  23;         7£^  L I F  E  A.  D.  f  740? 

One  Day  I  remember  in  particular  (  I  think  it  was  in  Juni 
1740.  )  I  walked  to  a  confiderable  Diftance  from  the  College, 
in  the  Fields  alone  at  Noon,  and  in  Prayer  found  fuch  unfpeak- 
able  Sweetnefs  and  Delight  in  God,  that  I  thought,  if  Imuft 
continue  ftill  in  this  evil  World,  I  wanted  always  to  be  there,  to 
behold  God's  Glory  :  My  Soul  dearly  loved  all  Mankind,  and 
longed  exceedingly  that  they  fhould  enjoy  what  I  enjoyed.—— 
It  feem'd  to  be  a  little  Refemblance  of  Heaven. 

On  Lord's- Day,  July  6.  being  Sacrament- Day,  I  found  fome 
divine  Life  and  fpiritual  Refrefhment  in  that  holy  Ordinance, 
When  I  came  from  the  Lord's  Table,  I  wondered  how  my  Fel- 
low-Students could  live  as  I  was  fenfible  moft  did Next 

Lord's-Day  July  13.  I  had  fome  fpecial  Sweetnefs  in  Religion.— 
Again  Lord's-Day  July  20.  my  Soul  was  in  a  fwect  and  preci- 
ous Frame. 

Sometime  in  Jugufl  following,  I  became  fo  weakly  and 
difordered,  by  too  clofe  Application  to  my  Studies,  that  I  was 
advifed  by  my  Tutor  to  go  Home,  and  difengage  my  Mind  from 
Study,  as  much  as  I  could  ;  for  I  was  grown  fo  Weak,  that  I 
began  to  fpit  Blood.  I  took  his  Advice,  and  endeavoured  to  lay 
alide  my  Studies.  But  being  brought  very  low,  I  look'd  Death 
in  the  Face  more  fted/aftly  ;  and  the  Lord  was  pleafed  to  give 
me  renewediy  a  fweet  Senfe  and  Relifli  of  divine  Things ;  and 
particularly  in  OSloher  13,  I  found  divine  Help  and  Confolation 
in  the  precious  Duties  ot  fecret  Prayer  and  Self  Examination, 
and  mySoultookDelight  intheblefled  God  :— fo  likcwifeon  the 
1 7  th  of  Oilober, 

Sat ui day  Oilober  18.  in  my  Morning-Devotions,  my  Soul 
was  exceedingly  melced  for  and  bitterly  mourned  over  my  ex- 
ceeding Sinfulnefs  and  P'ilenefs.  I  never  before  had  felt  fo  pun- 
gent and  deep  a  Senfe  of  the  odious  Nature  of  Sin, as  at  thisTime, 
My  Soul  was  then  unufual'y  carry'd  forth  in  Love  to  God,  and 
had  a  lively  Senfe  of  God's  Love  to  me.  And  this  Love  and 
Hope,  at  that  Time,  caft  out  Fear.  Both  Morning  and  Even- 
ing I  rpent  fome  Time  in  Self-Examination,  to  find  the  Truih  of 
Grace,  as  alfo  my  Firnefs  to  approach  to  God  at  his  Table  the 
next  Day  ;  and  through  infinite  Grace,  found  the  holy  Spirit 
influencing  my  Soul  with  Love  to  God,  as  a  Witneji  within  tny 

f'<f- 

Lord's-Day  O^ober  19.  In  the  Morning,  I  felt  my  Soul  bun^ 
gring  andihirjiing  after  RigbteouJnef\.  In  the  Fore-Noon,  while 
I  w^s  lookin^i  on  the  Sacramental  Elements,  and  thinking  that 
y*/ui  Chriji  wculd  focn  h^Jet  forth  (rucijied  before  me^  my  Soul 


'Bt.  23^     of  Mr]  David  Brainerd,     A.D.  1 741:     j  ^ 

was  fill'd  with  Light  and  Love,  fo  that  I  was  almoft  in  an  Ex- 
tafy  ;  my  Body  was  fo  weak,  I  could  fcarcely  ftand.  1  felt  at 
the  fame  Time  an  exceeding  Tendernefs  and  moft  fervent  Love 
towards  all  Mankind  ;  fo  that  my  Soul  and  all  the  Powers  of 
it  fcemedj  as  it  were,  to  melt  into  Softnefs  and  Sweetnefs. 
But  in  the  Scafon  of  theCommunion  there  was  fomp  Abatement 
of  this  fweet  Life  and  Fervour.  This  Love  and  Joy  caft  out 
Fear  {  and  my  Soul  longed  for  perfect  Grace  -ind  Giory.  This 
fweet  Frame  continued  'till  the  Evening,  when  my  Soul  was 
fweetly  fpiritual  in  fecret  Duties. 

Monday,  OSfober  20.  I  again  found  thefwect  Affiftanceof  the; 
holy  Spirit  in  fecret  Duties^  both  Morning  and  Evening,  and. 
Life  and  Comfort  in  Religion  through  the  whole  Day. 

Tuefday,  OSiober  21.  I  had  likewifeExperience  of  thcGood- 
nefs  of  God  in  Jhedding  abroad  his  Love  in  my  Hearty  and  giv- 
ing me  Delight  and  Confolation  in  religious  Duties.  And  all 
the  remaining  Part  of  the  Week,  my  Soul*feemed  to  be  taken 
up  with  divine  Things.  I  now  fo  longed  after  God,  and  to  be 
freed  from  Sin,  that  when  (  felt  myfelf  recovering,  and  thought 
I  muft  return  to  College  again,  which  had  proved  (o  hurtfuF 
to  my  fpiritual  Intereft  theYearpaft,  I  could  not  but  be  grtcved^. 
and  1  thought  I  had  much  rather  have  died  ;  for  it  diftrefs'd 
me,  to  think  of  getting  away  from  God.  But  before  I  went,  I 
enjoyed  feveral  other  fweet  and  precious  Seafons  of  Communioa 
with  God  {  particularly  OSiober  30.  and  Nov*  4.  )  wherein  my 
Soul  enjoyed  unfpeakable  Comfort. 

I  returned  to  College  about  November  6.  and  through  the 
Goodncfs  of  God  felt  the  Power  of  Religion  almoft  daily,  lor 
the  Space  of  fix  Weeks. 

November  28.  In  my  Evening- Devotion,  I  enjoyed  precious 
Difcoveries  of  God,  and  was  unfpeakably  refrefhed  with  that 
PafTage  Heb.  xii.  22,  23,  24.  That  my  Som\  longed  to  wing 
away  for  the  Paradi(e  of  God  ;  I  longed  to  be  conformed  to 
God  in  all  Things.—  A  Day  or  two  after,  I  enjoyed  much 
of  the  Light  of  God*s  Countenance^  moft  of  the  Day  ;  and  jqtiy 
Soul  refted  in  God. 

Tuefday,  December  9.  I  was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  of  Soul 
moft  of  the  Day  j  but  efpecially  in  Evening- Devotions,  When 
God  was  pleafed  wonderfully  to  affift  and  ftrengthen  me  ;  fo 
that  I  thought  nothing  (hould  ever  move  me  from  the  Love  of 
God  in  Chriftjefus  mvLord.— O  !  one  Hour  with  God  infinite- 
?y  exceeds  all  the  Plealurcs  and  Delights  pf  this  lowef  World. 

■     ^  D  Some- 


18    y^/.  23,24-     2^*5  LIFE     A.D.  1741  &?  174:^; 

Sometime  towards  thelatterEnd  oi  January  1740,41.  I  %i^% 
more  cold  and  dull  in  Matters  ^of  Religion,  by  Means  of  my_ 
old  Temptation,  v\%.  Ambition  in  my  Studies.—  But  thro' 
divine  Goodnefs,  a  great  and  general  Awakming  fpread  it  felf 
over  the  College,  about  the  latter  End  of  February ^  in  which  f 
fyras  much  quickned,and  more  abundantly  engaged  in  Religion* 

[  This  Awakening  here  fpoten  of,  was  at  fhe  Beginning  of 
that  extraordinary  religious  Commotion  through  the  Land, 
which  is  frefh  in  every  one's  Memory,  This  Awakening  was 
for  a  Time  very  great  and  general  at  'New-Haven  ;  and  the 
College  had  no  fmall  Share  in  it  :  That  Society  was  greatly  re- 
formed, the  Students  in  general  became  ferious,  and  many  of 
them  remarkably  fojand  much  engaged  in  the  Concerns  of  their 
eternal  Salvation.  And  however  undefirable  the  IfTue  of  the 
Awakenings  of  that  Day  have  appeared  in  many  others,  there 
have  been  manifeftly  happy  and  abiding  Effects  of  the  Impreffi- 
ons  then  made  on  the  Minds  of  many  of  the  Members  of  that 
College.  And  by  all  that  1  can  learn  concerning  Mr.  Brainerd, 
Ihcre  can  be  no  Reafon  to  doubt  but  that  he  had  much  of  God 'a 
gracious  Prefence,  and  of  the  lively  Ablings  of  true  Grace,  at 
that  Time  :  But  yet  he  was  afterwards  abundantly  fenfible,  that 
his  religious  Experiences  and  AiFetS^ions  at  that  Time  were  not 
/reefrom  a  corrupt  Mixture,  nor  his  Condu£l  to  be  acquitte4 
from  many  Things  that  were  imprudent  and  blamcable  ;  which 
jhe  greatly  lamented  himfelf,  and  was  willing  that  others  fhould 
forget,  that  none  might  make  an  ill  Improvement  of  fuch  anEx- 
ample.  And  therefore  altho'  in  the  Time  of  it,  he  kept  a  con- 
f^ant  Diary^  containing  a  very  particular  Account  of  what 
pafs'd  from  Day  to  Dny,  for  the  next  thirteen  Months,  froin 
the  latter  End  of  ya/zz/^rj;,  1740,41.  foremention'd,  in  two 
fmall  Books,  which  he  callsd  the  two  firft Volumes  of  hisDiary, 
next  following  the  Account  before  given  of  his  Convictions, 
Converfion,  and  confequent  Comforts  ;  yet,  when  he  lay  on  his 
Death- Bed,  he  gaveOrder  (unknown  to  me,'till  after  hisDeath) 
that  thefe  two  VoJumes  ihould  be  deftroyed,  and  in  the  Begin- 
ning; of  the  third  Book  of  his  Diary,  he  wrote  thus,  (  by  th©- 
Band  of  another, he  not  being  able  to  write  himfelf)  ''I'he  two 
**  preeceding  Volumes,  immediately  following  the  Account  of- 
**  the  Author'sConverrion,are  loft,  li  any  are  delirous  SQ  knov/ 
*'  how  the  Author  lived,  in  general, during  that  Space  of.T|p[ie» 
«*  let  them  read  the  firft:  ^thirty  Pages  of  this  Volume;  :Wb«r^' 
*^  they  Will  find  fgmethins  Qf  a  Spssiinjenof  hisordio^fjj.Mar.-'; 


^/.23,24.  fc/Mr.DavIdBrainerd.A.D.1741^1742.  19 

^«  ner  of  living,  through  that  whole  Space  of  Time,  which  waj 

««  about  13  Months  5  excepting  that  here  he  was  more  rcfiiied 

•'  fromfome  Imprudencies  and  indecent  Heuis,  than  there  ;  but 

*«  the  Spirit  of  Devotion  running  through  the  whole,   was  ths 

V  fame." 

It  could  not  be  otherwife  than  that  One  whofe  Heart  had  been 
fo  prepared  and  drawn  to  God,  zs  Mr,  Bra insnfs  had  been, 
•fliould  be  mightily  enlarged,  animated  and  engaged,  at  the  Sight 
of  fuch  an  Alteration  made  in  the  College,  the  Town  and  Land, 
and  fo  great  an  Appearance  of  Men's  reforming  theirLives,  and 
turning  from  their  Profanenefs  and  Imniorality,  to  ^erioufnefs 
and  Concern  for  their  Salvation,  and  of  Religion's  reviving  and 
fiourifliing  almoft  every  where.  But  as  an  intemperate  impru- 
dent Zeal,  and  a  Degree  of  Enthufiafm  foon  crept  in,  and  ming'* 
led  it  felf  with  that  Revival  of  Religion  ;  and  fo  great  and  gene- 
ral an  Awakening  being  quite  a  new  Thing  in  the  Land,  at  leafl 
as  to  all  the  living  Inhabitants  of  it  ;  neitherPeople  norMiniflers 
had  learn'd  thoroughly  to  diftinguifh  between  (olid  Religion  an4 
its  delufive  Counterfeits ;  even  many  Miniftcrs  of  the  Gofpel, 
of  long  (landing  and  the  beft  Rejmtation,  were  for  aTime  over- 
powered with  the  glaringAppearances  of  the  latter  :  And  there* 
fore  furely  it  was  not  to  be  wondered  at,  that  young  Braimrd^ 
but  a  Sopbimore  at  College,  fhould  be  fo  ;  who  was  not  only, 
young  in  Years,  but  very  young  in  Religion  and  J^xperience, 
and  had  had  but  little  Opportunity  for  the  Study  of  Divinity, 
and  ftill  lefs  for  Obfervation  of  the  Circumftances  and  Events 
of  fuch  an  extraordinaryState  of  Things  :  AManmufldiveft  him* 
felf  of  allReafon,  to  make  {l:ange  of  it.  In  thefe  difadvantagious 
Circumftances, 5r5/;z^r^  had  the  Unhappinefs  to  have  aTinclure 
of  that  intemperate  indifcreet  Zeal,  which  was  at  that  Time  toe* 
prevalent;  and  was  led,  from  his  high  Opinion  of  others  ihac 
he  looked  upon  better  than  himfelf,  into  fuch  Errors  as  were 
really  contrary  to  the  habitual  Temper  of  his  Mind.  One  In- 
ftance  of  his  Mifcondudl  at  that  Time,  gave  greatOfftnce  to  ths 
Rulers  of  the  College,  even  to  that  Degree  that  they  expeil'^i 
him  the  Society  ;  which  it  is  neceilary  (liould  h6c  be  particular 
ly  related,  with  it's  Circumftances. 

In  the  Time  of  the  Awakening  at  College,  there  wci  -  iw.  > .  u. 
religious  Students   that  afibciated  themfelves  one  wit^  another' 
for  mutual  Convcrfation  and  Affiftancc  in  fpirilual  Thin 
v;£ie  want  freely  to  open  themfelves  one  to  anotherj   ■^-  ,■ 

D  2  -^- 


£0      ^V.  24."  !ra<?  LIFE  *4.D.  1742: 

an  J  intimate  Friends :  Bralnerd  was  one  of  this  Company.  And 
it  once  happ»ii''o',  that  he  and  two  or  three  more  of  thefe  his 
intimate  Friends  were  in  the  Hall  together,  after  Mr.  Whittelpy, 
one  of  'he  Tutors,  had  been  to  Prayer  there  with  the  Scholars  ; 
no  other  Pcrfon  now  remaming  in  the  Hall,  but  Brainerd  and 
thefc  his  Companions.  Mr.  TVhittelfey  having  been  unufually 
pathetical  in  his  Prayer,  one  of  Brainerd^s  Friends  on  this  Oc- 
cafion  afked  him  what  he  thought  of  Mr.  Whiitelf-ty  \  He  made 
Anfvver,  He  has  no  more  Grace  than  this  Chair.  One  of  the 
Frefhmen  happening  at  that  Time  to  be  near  the  Hall  (tho*  not 
in  the  Room)  over-heard  thofe  Words  of  his  ;  tho*  he  heard 
no  Name  mention'd.  and  knew  not  who  the  Perfon  was,  which 
was  thus  cenfured  :  He  informed  a  certain  Woman  that  belonged 
to  the  Town,  withal  telling  her  his  own  Sufpicion,  viz.  that 
he  believ'd  Brainerd  faid  this  of  fome  one  or  other  of  the  Rulers 
cf  the  College.  Whereupon  fliewent  &  informed  the  Re6lor, 
vvho  Tent  for  this  Frefhman  and  examined  him  ;  and  he  told  the 
Ke£lor  the  Words  that  he  heard  Brainerd  utter,  and  informed 
h\xn  who  were  in  the  Room  with  him  at  that  Time.  Upon 
■u'hich  the  Redor  fent  for  them  :  They  were  very  backward  to 
jnform  againft  their  Friend,  of  that  which  they  look'd  upon  as 
private  Converfation,  and  efpecially  as  none  but  they  had  heard 
or  knew  of  whom  he  had  uttered  thofe  Words ;  yet  the  Re6lor 
compelPd  them  to  declare  what  he  faid,  and  of  whom  he  faid 
at.-—  Brainerd  look'd  on  himfelf  greatly  abufed  in  the  Manage- 
ment of  this  Affair ;  and  thought,  that  what  he  faid  in  private, 
•was  injurioufly  extorted  from  his  Friends,  and  that  then  it  was 
5njurioufly  required  of  him  (as  it  was  wont  to  be  of  fuch  as  had 
teen  guilty  of  fome  open  notorious  Crime)  to  make  a  publick 
<Jor.fefiion,   and  to  humble  himfelf  before  the  whole  College  in 

the  Hall,  for  v/hat  he  had  faid  only  in  private  Converfation. 

lie  not  complying  with  this  Demand,  ?nd  having  gone  once  to 
the  feparate  Wxttungzi  New-Hwoen,  when  forbidden  by  the 
Recf^or,  and  alfo  having  been  accufed  by  one  Perfon  of  faying 
concerning  the  Re£lor,  (hat  he  wondered  he  did  not  expert  to 
drop  down  dead  for  fining  the  Scholars  who  fol lowed Mr.7>««tf«/ 
to  MUfcrcl^  tho*  there  was  no  Proof  of  it  (and  Mr.  Brainerd 
ever  profefsM  that  he  did  noi  remember  his  faying  any  Thing  t^ 
that  Purpofe)   for  thefe  Things  he  was  expcll'd  the  College. 

Now,  how  far  fhe  Circumftances  and  Exigences  of  that  Day 
might  julfify  Aich  great  Severity  in  the  Governors  of  theCollege, 
I  will  not  undertake  to  determine  \  it  being  my  Aim,  not  rpi 

brin* 


""JEt.  24:      0}  Mr.  David  Braincrd,      A.D. 1 742;    21 

trlng  Reproach  on  the  Authority  of  the  College,  but  only  to  do 
Tuftice  to  the  Memory  of  a  Perfon  who  I  think  to  be  eminently 

one  of  thofe  whofe  Memory  is  blejfed The  Reader  will  fee, 

in  the  Sequel  of  the  Story  of  Mr.  Brainerd's  Life,  J  what  his 
own  Thoughts  afterwards  were  of  hisBehaviour  in  thefeThings, 
and  in  how  Chriftian  a  Manner  he  conduaed  himfelf,  with  Rcf- 
pe£l  to  this  Affair  ;  tho*  he  ever,  as  long  as  he  lived,  fuppofed 
himfelf  much  abufed,  in  the  Management  of  it,  and  in  what 
he  fuffer*d  in  it. 

His  Expulfion  was  in  the  Winter  Jnno  1741,2.  while  he  waj 
in  his  third  Year  in  College.] 


-5i=^.^ 


J  Particularly  under  the  Date,  Wedn^fday^  Sept.  14.   174^. 


»ISISi?1^2S^l^lISI§?^?'^^^2i^5^5^s? 


PART 


?SSS!SilS^2l^^^!S!Si?lll?SIS^^I§IS^^ 


i3    ^/.  24.  Ti&5  LIFE  A.D.I 742; 


Part     II. 

From  about  the  Time  that  he  firji  hega7t  to 
devote  hiinf elf  more  efpecially  tothe^tudy 
of  Divinity,  "till  he  was  examined  and 
lice7tfed  to  preach,  hy  the  A^ociation  of 
Minifiers  belonging  to  the  Eaflern  Dif- 
triEi  of  the  County  of  Fairfield  in  Con- 
nedicut. 


["M  y|"R.  Bralnerd,  the  spring  after  his  Expulfion,  went  to 
I V/1  Jive  with  the  Rev,  Mr.  Mills  of  Ripton,  to  follow  his 
"^  -*•  iStudies  with  him,  in  order  to  his  being  fitted  for  the 
Work  of  the  Miniftry  ;  where  he  fpenf  the  greater  Part  of  the 
Time  'till  the  AlToGiaiion  licenfed  him  to  preach  ;  but  fre- 
quently rode  to  vifit  the  neighbouring  Minifters,  particularly 
^r.  Cooke  of  Stratfieldy  Mr.  Graham  of  Soi^ihbury^  and  Mr, 
Bellamy  of  Bethlehem, 

Here  (at  Mr.  Midi's)  he  began  the  third  Book  of  his  DIary> 
in  which  the  Account  he  wrote  of  himfelf,  is  as  follows.] 

lliurfday,  j4pril  i,  1742.  I  feem  to  be  declining  withRefpefl 
to  my  Life  &  Warmth  in  divincThings :  Had  not  fo  freeAccefs 
"to  God  in  Prayer,  as  ufual  of  late.  O  that  God  would  humble 
ine  deeply  in  th«  Duft  before  him.  I  deferve  Hell  every  Day, 
for  net  loving  my  Lord  more,  who  has  (I  truft  )  /oved  me  end 
given  himfelf  for  me  ;  and  every  Time  I  am  enabled  to  exercife 
anyGrace  renewedlyj  arn  renewedly  indebted  to  the  God  of  all 
Grace  for  fpecial  AfTiflance.  Where  then  is  Boajiing  ?  Surely  it 
is  exiluded,  when  we  think  how  we  are  dependent  on  God  for 
the  Being  iind  every  A6t  of  Grace.  Oh, if  ever  I  get  to  Heaven, 
it  will  be  becaufe  God  will,  and  nothing  elfe  ;  fori  never  did 
any  thing  of  my  ff;lf,  but  get  away  from  God  !  My  Soul  will 
be  aftonifhed  at  the  unfearchable  Riches  of  divine  Grace,  when 
I  arrive  at  the  Manfifi^s^  which  the  blelTed  Saviour  is  gon«  be-  - 
lore  to  prepare- 


\PEt.2d,:      <?/ 7.^r.  David  Braintrd.     A.D.1742:    20 

Friuay,  y^pril  2.  In  the  Afternoon  I  felt  fomething  fweetly 
in  fecret  Prayer,  much  refigned,  calm  and  ferene.  What  are  all 
the  Storms  of  this  lower  World,  if  Jefus  by  his  Spirit  does  but 
come  vjalking  on  the  Seas  !  — SomeTime  paft,  I  had  much  Piea- 
fure  in  the  Profpcd  of  the  Heathens  being  brought  home  to 
Chrift,  and  defired  that  the  Lord  would  improve  me  in  that 
Work  : — But  now  my  5oul  more  frequently  defires  to  die,  to  be 
wtthChri/I.  O  that  my  Som\  were  wrapt  up  in  divineLove,  and 
my  longing  Defires  after  God  increafed.—  In  the  Evening,  was 
refrefh'd  in  Prayer,  with  the  Hopes  of  the  Advancement  of 
Chrift's  Kingdom  in  the  World. 

Saturday,  j^pril  3.  Was  very  much  amifs  this  Morning,  and 
had  an  ill  Night  lalt  Night.  I  thought,  if  God  would  take  me 
to  himfelf  now,  my  5oul  would  exceedingly  rejoyce.  O  that  J 
may  bs  always  humble  and  refign'd  to  God,  and  that  God  would 
caufe  my  So\x\  to  be  more  fix'd  on  himfelf,  that  I  may  be  more 
fitted  both  for  doing  and  fufFering. 

Lords-Day,  Jpril  4.  My  Heart  was  wandring  and  lifelefs.-- 
In  the  Evening  God  gave  me  Faith  in  Prayer,  and  made  my 
Squ\  melt  in  fomeMeafure,  and  gave  me  to  tafte  a  divine  5weetr 
nefs.---  O  my  bleflcd  God  !  Let  me  climb  up  near  \o  him, 
and  love,  and  long,  and  plead,  and  wreftle,  and  reach,  and 
ftretch  after  him,  and  for  Deliverance  from  the  Body  of  Sin  and 
Death.—'  Alas,  my  So\x\  mourn 'd  to  think  I  fhould  ever  lofe 
-Sight  of  it's  Beloved  again  !  O  come^  Lord  Jesus  /  Amen. 

[On  the  Evening  of  x\\Qnexi  Day,  he  complains  that  be 
feem'd  to  be  void  of  all  Relifli  of  divineThings,  felt  much  of  the 
Prevalence  of  Corruption,  and  faw  in  himfelf  a  Difpofition  to 
all  Manner  of  5in  ;  which  brought  a  very  great  Gloom  on  his 
Mind,  and  caft  him  down  into  the  Depths  of  Melancholy  j  fo 
that  he  fpeaks  of  himfelf,  as  aftoniflied,  amazed,  having  no 
Comfort,  being  filled  with  Horror,  feeing  no  Comfort  in  Hea- 
ven or  Earth. 

ruefday,y^r/7  6.  I  walked  out  thisMorning  to  the  famePlace 
where  I  was  laftNight,and  felt  fomething  as  I  did  then  ;  But  waa 
fomething  relieved  by  reading  fome  PaiTages  in  my  Diary,  and 
feem'd  to  feel  as  iff  might  pray  to  the  great  God  again  with 
Freedom  ;  but  was  fuddenly  ftruck  with  a  Damp,  from  the 
Senfe  I  had  of  my  own  Vilenefs.--  Then  I  cryM  to  God  to 
V/afli  my  Soul  and  cleanfe  me  from  my  exceeding  Filthinefs,  tcj 
give  me  Repentance  and  Pardon  ;  and  it  began  to  be  feme- 
thins  fweef,  to  pray  ;---  And  I  cculd  think  of  undergoing  the 

grcatcft. 


24      JE/.24:  The   LIFE  :A.D.i742: 

greateft  Sufferings  in  the  Caufe  of  Chrift,  with  Pleafure  ;  and 
found  my  feU  willing  (  if  God.  (hould  fo  order  it)  to  fufFcr  Ba-* 
niftiment  from  my  native  Land,  among  the  Heathen^  that  I 
might  do  fomething  for  their  Souls  Salvation,  in  Diftrefles  and 
Deaths  of  any  Kind.-—  Then  God  gave  me  to  wreftle  earneftly 
for  others,  for  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift  in  the  World,  and  for 
dear  Chriftian  Friends.  —  I  felt  wean'd  from  the  World  and 
from  my  own  Reputation  amongft  Men,  willing  to  be  defpiftd, 
and  to  be  a  gazing  Stock  for  the  World  to  behold.—  'Tis  im- 
poflible  for  me  to  exprefs  how  1  then  felt  :  I  had  not  much  Joy, 
but  fome  Senfe  of  the  Majcfty  of  God,  which  made  me  as  it 
were  tremble  :  I  faw  my  felf  mean  and  vile,  which  made  me 
more  willing  that  God  fhould  do  what  he  would  with  me  5  it 
was  all  infinitely  reafonable. 

Wednefday,  Jpril  7.  I  had  not  fo  much  Fervency,  but  felt 
fomething  as  I  didYefterday-Morning,in  Prayer  : —  At  Noon  \ 
fpent  fome  Time  in  fecret,  with  fome  Fervency,  but  fcarce  any 
Sweetnefs  :  And  felt  very  dull  in  the  Evening. 

Thurfday,  yipril  8. —  Had  raifed  Hopes  to  Day  refpc6ling 
the  Heathen,  O  that  God  would  bring  in  great  Numbers  of 'em 
to  Jefus  Chrift.  I  can't  bu t  hope  I  fhall  fee  that  glorious  Day .— 
Every  Thing  in  this  World  feems  exceeding  vile  and  little  to 
me  :  I  look  fo  to  my  felf.-— I  had  fome  littleDawn  of  Comfort  to 
toay  in  Prayer  :  But  efpecially  to  Night  I  think  I  had  fome 
Faith  and  Power  of  Interceffion  with  God,  was  enabled  to  plead 
with  Qod  for  the  Growth  of  Grace  in  my  felf ;  and  many  of  the 
T^ear  Children  of  God  then  lay  with  Weight  upon  my  Soul. 
BlefTed  be  the  Lord.     'Tis  good  to  wreftle  for  divine  Bleffings. 

Friday,  April  9.  Moft  of  my  Time  in  Morning-Devotion 
was  fpent  without  fcnfible  Sweetnefs  ;  yet  I  had  one  delightful 
Prcfpe(5t  of  arriving  at  the  heavenly  World,  I  am  more  amaz'd 
than  ever  at  fuch  Thoughts  ;  for  1  fee  my  felf  infinitely  vile 
and  unworthy.  I  feel  very  heartlefs  and  dull  ;  and  tho'  I  long 
for  the  Prefence  of  God,  and  feem  conftantly  to  reach  towards 
God  in  Defires,  yet  I  can't  feel  that  divine  and  heavenly  Sweet- 
nefs that  I  ufed  to  enjoy. --No  poor  Creature  ftands  in  Need  of 
divine  Grace  more  than  I,  and  none  abufe  it  more  than  1  have 
done,  and  ftill  do. 

Saturday,  April  10.  Spent  much  Time  in  fecret  Prayer  this 
Morning,  and  not  without  fome  Comfort  in  divine  Things,  and 
I  hope  had  fome  Faith  in  Exercife :  But  am  fo  low,  and  feel  fa 
little  of  the  fcnfible  Prefence  of  God,  that  I  hardly  know  what 
^ocaiJ  Faiih^  and  am  made  rs>  pojfefi  th  ^im  of  my  Tmh,  and 


^/.  24-    ^/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A,D,iY\2.    25 

the  dreadful  Sfh  of  my  Nature,  and  am  all  Sin  ;  I  can't  think 
hor  aa,  but  every  Motion  is  Sin.  --  I  feel  fome  faint  Hopes* 
that  God  willj  of  his  infinite  Mercy,  return  again  withShowera 
of  converting  Grace  to  poor  Gofpel^abufing  Sinners  ;  and  my 
Hopes  of  being  improved  in  the  Gaufe  of  God,  which  of  late 
have  been  almoft  extindt,  feem  novv  a  little  revived.  O  that 
all  my  late  Diftrcfles  and  avi^ful  Apprehenfions  might  prove  but 
Chrift's  School,  to  make  me  fit  for  greater  Service,  by  learning 
me  the  great  Leflbn  of  Humility. 

Lord's- Day,  jlpril  n.  In  the  Morning,  felt  but  little  Life, 
excepting  that  myHeart  was  fomething  drawn  out  in  Thankful- 
nefs  to  God  for  his  amazing  Grace  and  Condefcenfion  to  me  in 

paft  Influences  and  Affiftances  of  his  Spirit. Afterwards  had 

ibme  Sweetnefs  in  the  Thoughts  of  arriving  at  the  heavenly 
World.  O  for  the  happy  Day  !—  After  publickWorfhip  God 
gave  me  fpecial  AfTiftance  in  Prayer ;  I  wreftled  with  my  dear 
Lord)  with  much  Sweetnefs  ;  and  Interceffion  was  made  a  fwect 

and  delightful  Employment  to  me. In  the  Evening,  as  I  was 

viewing  the  Light  in  the  Norths  was  delighted  in  Contemplation 
on  the  glorious  Morning  of  the  Rcfurredtion. 

Monday,  Jpril  12.  This  Morning  the  Lord  was  pleas'd  to 
lift  up  the  Light  of  his  Countenance  upon  me  in  fecret  Prayer,  and 
made  the  Seafon  very  precious  to  my  Soul.  And  tho'  I  have 
been  fo  deprefs*d  of  late,  refpccSling  my  Hopes  of  future  Servi^ 
ceablenefs  in  the  Caufe  of  God  ;  yet  now  I  had  much  En- 
couragement refpedting  that  Matter.  I  was  fpccially  afiifted 
to  interceed  and  plead  for  poor  Souls,  and  for  the  Enlargement 
of  Chrift's  Kingdom  in  the  World,  and  for  fpecial  Grace  for 
my  felf,  to  fit  me  for  fpecial  Services.  I  felt  exceeding  calm, 
and  quite  refign'd  to  God,  refpefting  my  future  Improvement, 
when  and  where  he  pleafed  :  My  Faith  lifted  me  above  the 
World,  and  removed  all  thofe  Mountains,  that  I  could  not 
look  over  of  late  :  I  thought  I  wanted  not  the  Favour  of  Man 
to  lean  upon  ;  for  1  knew  Chrift's  Favour  was  infinitely  better, 
and  that  it  was  no  Matter  tuhen^  nor  where^  nor  how  Chrift 
i^ould  fend  me, nor  what  Trials  he  (hould  ftill  cXcrcife  me  with> 
if  I  might  be  prepared  for  hisWork&Will.  I  how  found  fweetiy 
revived  in  myMind  the  wonderful  Difcovery,  of  infinite  Wifdotn 
in  all  the  Difpenfations  of  God  towards  me,  which  I  had  a  lit- 
tle before  I  met  with  my  great  Trial  at  College  ;  every  Thing 
appeared  full  of  the  iVifdom  of  God, 

Tuefday,  yfpril  i  j.  Saw  my  felf  to  be  very  mean  and  vile  | 
w»ii^^  at  thgft  that  ftewcd  n^e  R^^p^ft,  Aft€rwar<is  wat 
•-     ' -  E  "    -  ~  foma* 


7. 6    JEl  24:        Tbs  LIFE  A.  D:  i  742: 

fomething  comforted  in  fecret  Retiremenf,  and  was  afiifted  t© 
wreflle  with  God,  with  fome  Power,  Spirituality  and  Sweetnefs. 
Bleflpd.be  the  Lord,  he  is  never  unmindjul  oF  me,  but  always 
fends  "me  ne^ied  Supplies,  and  from  Time  to  Time,  when  I 
am  like  one  dead,  raifes  me  to  Life,  O  that  I  may  never 
diftrafl  infinite  Goodnefs. 

Wednefday,  /fpril  14.  My  Squ\  longed  for  Communion  with 
Chrift,  and  for  the  Mortification  of  indwelling  Corruption,  ef- 
pecially  fpiritual  Pride.  O  (here  is  a  fweetDay  coming,  wherein 
the  weary  will  he  at  Reji.  My  Soul  has  enjoyed  muchSweetnefs 
this  Day  in  the  Hopes  of  its  fpeedy  arrival. 

Thurfday,  Jpril  15.  My  Defires  apparently  centerM  in 
GoD>  and  I  found  a  fenfible  Attraction  of  Soul  after  him,  fun- 
dry  Times  to  Day  :  I  know  /  long  for  GOD,  and  a  Conformity 
to  his  Will,  in  inward  Purity  and  Holinefs,  tenThoufandTimes 
mere  than  for  any  Thing  here  below. 

Friday  &  Saturday,  Jpril  16,17.  Seldom  prayed  without 
fome  fenfible  Sweetnefs  and  Joy  in  the  Lord.  Sometimes  I 
longed  much  io  be  dijfolved  and  to  be  with  ChriJI.  O  that  God 
would  enable  me  to  grow  in  Grace  every  Day.  Alas,  my  Bar* 
rennefs  is  fuch,  that  God  might  well  fay.  Cut  it  down,  —  I  am 
afraid  of  a  dead  Heart  on  the  Sabbath  now  begun  :  O  that  God 
would  quicken  me  by  his  Grace. 

Lord's-Day  Jpril  18.  Retir'd  early  this  Morning  into  the 
Woods  for  Prayer  j  had  the  Afliftance  of  God's  Spirit,  and 
Faith  in  Exercife,  and  was  enabled  to  plead  with  Fervency  for 
the  Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  in  the.  World,  and  to 
interceei  for  dear  abfent  Friends.  —  At  Noon,  God  enabled 
me  to  wreftle  with  him,  and  to  feel  (as  I  trufl)  the  Power  cf 
divine  Love  in  Prayer.  ---  At  Night,  faw  my  feif  infinitely  in- 
debted to  God,  and  had  'a  View  of  my  Short- comings :  It 
feem'd  to  me,  that  I  b?,d  done  as  it  were  nothing  for  God,  and 
that  I  never  had  lived  to  him  but  a  few  Hours  of  my  Life. 

Monday,  j^prii  19.  I  fet  apart  this  Day  for  Fafting  &  Prayer 
to  God  for  his  Grace,  efpecially  to  prepare  me  for  the  Work  of 
the  Minijiry^  to  give  me  divine  Aid  and  Direction  in  myPrepa- 
rations  for  that  great  Work,  and  in  his  own  Time  to  fend  me 
into  his  Harve/i,  Accordingly,  in  the  Morning,  endeavoured 
to  piead  for  the  divine  Prefence  for  the  Day,  and  not  without 
fbme  Life.  In  the  Forenoon,  I  felt  a  Power  of  Interceffion  for 
precious  immortal  Souls,  for  the  Advancement  of  the  Kingdom 
of  my  dear  Lord  and  Saviour  in  the  World  ;  and  withal,  amof^ 
fwcet  Refi^natien,  and  evta  CoiifolaiiQnand  Jo^  in  ifcc  Tho'ts 


Mt.i^:      ^/Afr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.i;42.     ij 

of  fuffcring  Hardfhips,  DlftrefTcs,  and  even  Death  it  felf,  in  the 
PfomotJonof  it  ;  and  had  fpecial  Enlargement  in  pleadine;  for 
the  Enlightning  and  Converfion  of  tiie  pour  Heathen.  ..  \t\  the 
Afternoon,  God  wa^  with  me  of  a  Truth.  O  'twas !  blefled 
Company  indeed  !  God  enabled  me  fo  to  agonize  in  Prayer, 
that  I  was  quite  wet  with  Sweat,  tho'  in  the  Shade,  and  the 
Wind  cool.  My  Soul  was  drawn  out  very  much  for  theWarld  - 
I  grafp'd  for  Multitudes  of  Souls.  I  think,  I  had  more  £nlarc;c- 
ment  for  Sinners, than  for  the  Children  of  God  ;  tho*  I  felt  a^  if 
I  could  fpend  my  Life  in  Cries  for  both.  r*^njoyed  great 
Sweetnefs  in  Communion  with  my  dear  Saviour,  i  think,  I 
never  in  my  ,Life  felt  fuch  an  intire  Weanednefs  from  this 
World,  and  fo  much  refignM  to  God  in  every  Thing.  — -  O 
that  {  may  always  live  to^  and  u^on  my  bleflcd  God.  Amen, 
Amen. 

Tuefday,  Ap^il  20.  This  Day  I  am  twenty- four  Years  of 
Age.  O  how  much  M-ercy  have  T  received  the  Year  pafl !  — 
How  often  has  God  caufed  his  Gosdnefs  to  pafs  before  me  f  And 
how  pooxly  have  I  anfwered  theVpws  I  made  thisTime  twelve- 
month, to  be  wholly  the  Lord's^  to  be  forever  devoted  to  hts 
Service  !  The  Lord  help  me  to  live  more  to  his  Glory  forTime 
to  come.-—  This  has  been  a  fweet,  a  bappy  Day  to  me  :  Bkfled 
be  God.  I  think,  my  Soul  was  never  (o  drawM  out  in  Inter- 
ceifion  for  tf/^^n,  as  it  has  been  this  Night.  Had  a  moft  fer- 
vent Wreftlc  with  the  Lord  to  Night  for  my  Enemies ;  and  I 
hardly  ever  fo  longed  to  live  to  God,  and  to  be  altogether  de- 
voted to  him  ;  I  wanted  to  wear  out  my  Life  in  his  Service  and 
for  his  Glory. 

Wednefday,  /fpril  21.  Felt  much  Calmnefs  and  Refignation, 
and  God  again  enabled  me  to  wref^le  for  Numbers  of  Souls, and 
had  much  Fervency  in  the  fweet  Duty  of  Interceflion.  —  I  en- 
joy of  late  more  Sweetnefs  in  Intercejfion  for  others,  than  in  any 
other  Part  of  Prayer.  My  bleiled  Lord  really  l^c  me  come  near 
to  hiaiy  and  plead  with  bim* 

[Tbe  Frame  of  Mind,  and  Exerclfes  of  Soul,  that  he  ex- 
preiTes  the  three  Days  next  following,  Tkurfday,  Friday  and 
Saturday,  are  much  of  the  fame  Kind  with  thofe  exprefs'^  the 
two  Days  paft.] 

LordVDay  April  25.  This  Morning  fpent  about  twoHou^ri 
in  fecret  Duties,  and  was  enabled  more  than  ordinarily  to  a^^- 
nizs  for  immortal  Souls  »  ibo'  it  v^as  early  'n\  the  Mornir-ga^^^^ 

E  %  the 


28    Ml  IS.         f^^  LIFE  A.  D.I  742: 

the  Sun  fcarcely  fhined  at  all,  yet  my  Body  was  quite  wet  with 
Sweat.  Felt  much  prefs'd  now,  as  frequently  of  late,  to  plead 
for  the  Meeknefs  and  Calmnefs  of  thi  L,amb  of  God  in  mySouI : 
Thro*  divine  Goodnefs  felt  much  of  it  this  Morning.  O  'tis 
a  fvveet  Dlfpofition,  heartily  to  forgive  all  Injuries  done  us  ;  to 
wifli  our  greateft  Enemies  as  well  as  we  do  our  own  Souls  ! 
Blefledjefus,  may  I  daily  be  more  and  more  conformed  to  Thee. 
At  Night  was  exceedingly  melted  with  divine  Love,  and  had 
fome  feeling  Senfe  of  the  BlefTednefs  of  the  upper  World. 
Thofe  Words  hung  upon  me, with  much  divine  SweetnefsjPfal. 
Ixxxiv.  7.  They  go  from  Strength  to  Strength^  every  one  of  them  in 
Zion  appear eth  before  God.  O  the  near  Accefs^  that  God  fome- 
times  gives  us  in  our  Addrefles  to  him  I  This  may  well  be 
tern[ied  appearing  before  God :  'Tis  fo  indeed, in  the  true  fpiritual 
Senfe,  and  in  the  fweeteft  Senfe.--— I  think  I  have  not  had  fuch 
Power  of  Interceffion,  thefe  niany  Months,  both  for  God's 
Children,  and  for  dead  Sinners,  as  I  have  had  this  Evening. 
I  wiftied  and  longed  for  the  Coming  of  my  dear  Lord  :  I  long'd  to 
join  the  Angelick  Hofts  in  Praifips,  wholly  free  from  Imper- 
fe^ion.  O  the  blefTed  Moment  haftens  !  All  I  want  is  to  be 
more  holy,  more  like  my  dear  Lord.  O  for  Sandtifjcation  f 
My  very  Soul  pants  for  the  compleat  Reftoration  of  the  blefled 
Image  of  my  fweet  Saviour  ;  that  I  may  be  fit  for  the  blefTed 
Enjoyments  and  Employments  of  the  heavenly  World, 

Farewell,   vain  World  ;    7/iy  Soul  can  bid  Adieu  : 
My  Saviour';   taught  me    to  abandon  you. 
Tour  Char  mi  may  gratify  a  fenfuai  Mind  ; 
ISiot  pieafe  a  Soul  vu hotly  for  GoD   deftgn'd. 
Forbear  i' entice,    cesfe  th^n  my  Soul  to  call': 
'Tis  fx'dj  tbrctigh  Grace  ;  my  God  Jhall  be  my  AIL 
While   he  thus   lets  me  heavenly  Glories  vieWy 
Tour  Beauties  fade^    my   Heart'' s  no  Room  for  you. 

The  Lord  refrefhed  my  Soul  with  many  fwect  Paflages  ol 
Lis  Word.  O  the  New  Jsrufalem  !  My  Soul  longed  for  it. 
O  the  Song  of  Alofes  and  the  Lamb  !  And  that  blefTed  Song, 
that  no  Man  can  learn,  but  they  that  are  redeemed  from  the 
Earth  !  And  the  glorioqs  whits  RobeSy  that  were  given  to  ih^ 
Souls  under  the  Altar  J 

Lord^   Pm  a  Stranger  here  alone  ; 
iliarth  no  true    Comforts  can  afford  : 
Tet,  ahjent  from  my  deareji  One, 
My    Soul   delights  to  cry^    My  Loid  I 


/£■/.  2S'      c/Mr.  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1742.    2^ 

Jesus,  my  Lord,  my  only  Love, 
Pojfefs  my  Soul,   nor  thence  depart  : 
Grant  me  kind  Vifits,    heavenly  Dove  ; 
My  God  Jhall  then  have  all  my  Heart, 

Monday,  Jpril  26.  Continued  in  a  fweet  Frame  of  Mind  • 
but  in  the  Afternoon  felt  fomething  of  fpiritual  Pride  ftirring! 
God  was  pleafed  to  make  it  a  humbling  Seafon  at  firft  ;  tho* 
afterwards  he  gave  me  Sweetnefs.  O  my  Soul  exceedingly 
longs  for  that  blefTed  State  of  Perfe6lion  of  Deliverance  from 
all  Sin  !-— At  Night,  God  enabled  me  to  give  my  Soul  up  to 
him,  to  caft  my  felf  upon  him,  to  be  ordered  and  difpofed  of 
according  to  his  fovereign  Pleafure  ;  and  [  enjoyed  great  Peace 
andConfolation  in  fo  doing.  My  Soul  took  fweetDelight  in  God 
to  Night :  MyThougbts  freely  and  fweotly  centred  in  him.  O 
that  i  could  fpend  every  Moment  of  my  Life  to  his  Glory. 

Tuefday,y^/)n7  27.  Retir'd  pretty  early  for  fecretDevotions  ; 
and  in  Prayer  God  was  pleafed  to  pour  fuch  ineffable  Comforts 
into  my  Soul,  that  I  could  do  nothing  for  fome  Time  but  fay 
over  and  over,  O  my  fweet  Saviour  !  O  my  fweet  Saviour  / 
Whom  have  I  in  Heaven,  but  Thee  f  and  there  is  none  upon  Earthy 
that  Idefire  hefide  Thee.  If  I  had  had  a  Thoufand  Lives,  mySouI 
would  gladly  have  laid  'em  all  down  at  once  to  have  been  with 
Chrjst.  My  Soul  never  enjoyed  fo  much  of  Heaven  befpre  ; 
'twas  the  moft  refined  and  moft  fpiritual  Seafon  of  Communion 
with  God  I  ever  yet  felt :  I  never  felt  fo  great  a  Degree  of 
Refignation  in  my  Life  :  I  felt  very  fweetly  all  the  Forenoon. — 
In  the  Afternoon  I  withdrew  to  meet  v/ith  my  God,  but  found 
my  felf  much  declined,  and  God  made  it  a  humbling  Seafon 
to  my  Soul ;  I  mourned  over  the  Body  of  Death,  that  is  in 
me  :  it  grieved  me  exceedingly,  that  [  could  not  pray  to 
and  praife  God  with  my  Heart  full  of  divine  heavenly  Love.--" 
O  that  my  Soul  might  never  offer  any  dead  cold  Services  to  my 
(Sod, —  In  the  Evening  had  not  fo  much  fv/eet  divine  Love,  as 
in  the  Morning  ;  but  had  a  fweet  Seafon  of  fervent  Inter cefjion, 

Wednefday,  April  28  Withdrew  to  my  ufual  Place  of  Re- 
tirement in  great  Peace  and  Tranquillity,  and  fpent  about  two 
Hours  in  fegretDuties.  1  itii  much  as  I  didYefterday-Morqing, 
only  \veaker  and  more  overcome.  I  fecmed  to  hang  and  depend 
wholly  on  my  dearLord  ;  wholly  wean'd  from  sll  otherDepen- 
dances.  I  knew  not  what  to  fay  to  myGod,bat  only  lean  en  his 
^ojom,  zsh  were,  &  breathe  out  my  Defircs  after  a  perfedCon- 
formity  to  him  in  ailThings.  ThirilingDsfifes$cinfatiablcI»ong- 

ii?gi 


§€>    mt.  25.  nt  LIFE  A.D.  1 742;^ 

ings  pofTcfled  my  Sou], after  perfeflHolinefs  :  God  was  fo  preci- 
ous to  my  Soul,  that  the  World  with  all  its  Enjoyments  was  in- 
finitely vile  :  I  had  no  more  Value  for  the  Favour  of  Men,  than 
for  Pebbles :  TTie  Lord  was  my  All  ;  and  He  over-ruled  all  ; 
which  greatly  delightad  me.  I  think,  my  Faith  and  Depen- 
dance  on  God  fcarce  ever  rofe  fo  high.  I  faw  Him  fuch  aFoun- 
tain  of  Goodnefs,  that  it  feem'd  impoffible  I  fhould  diftruft  him 
again,  or  be  any  Way  anxious  about  any  Thing  that  fhould 
happen  to  me*  I  now  enjoyed  great  Sweetnefs  in  praying  for 
abfent  Friends,  and  for  the  Enlargement  of  Chrift's  Khigdora 
in  the  World.— Much  of  the  Power  of  thefe  divine  Enjoyments 
remained  with  me  thro*  the  Day.—  In  the  Evening  my  Heart 
feem'dfweetly  to  melt, &  I  auft,was  really  humbled  for  indwel- 
ling Corruption,  and  I  mourned  like  a  Dove,  1  felt  that  all  jny 
Unhappinefs  arofe  from  my  being  a  Sinner  ;  for  withRefignation 
I  could  bid  Welcome  all  other  Trials  ;  but  Sin  hung  heavy 
upon  me ;  for  God  difcovered  to  me  the  Corruption  of  my 
Heart  :  fo  that  I  went  to  Bed  with  a  heavy  Heart,  hecaufe  I 
was  a  Sinner  ;  tho'  I  did  not  in  the  leaft  doubt  of  God's  Love^ 
O  that  God  would  purge  away  my  Drofs,  and  take  away  my  Tin^ 
land  make  me  feven  Times  refined. 

Thurfday,y^/ir/i  29.  Was  kept  off  at  aDiftance  from  Gojd  j— 
but  had  feme  Inlargement  in  Interceflion  for  precious  Souls. 

Friday,  Jpril  30.  Was  fomething  dejected  in  Spirit  :  No- 
thing grieves  me  fo  much,  as  that  I  cannot  live  conftantly  to 
God*s  Glory.  I  could  bear  any  Defertion  or  fpiritual  Confli<£ls, 
if  I  could  but  have  my  Heart  all  the  while  burning  within  mi 
with  Love  to  God  and  Defires  pf  his  Glory  :  But  this  is  im- 
poffible ;  for  when  \feel  thf  fe,  I  can't  be  dejeded  in  my  Soul, 
but  only  rejoyce  in  my  Saviour,  who  has  delivered  me  from  the 
reigningPower,  and  will  {hortly  deliver  me  from  the  Indwelling 
of  Sin. 

Saturday^  May  j.  Was  enabled  to  cry  toGod  withFervency 
for  minifterial  Qualifications,  and  that  God  would  appear  for 
the  Advancement  of  his  own  Kin^rdom,  and  that  be  would 
bring  in  the  Heathen  World,  &c.  Had  much  Affiftance  in  my 
Studies.— This  has  been  a  profitable  Week  to  me  ;  I  have  en- 
joyed many  Communications  of  the  bleffed  Spirit  in  my  Soul. 

Loj-d's-Day,  May  2.  God  was  pleafed  this  Morning  to  give 
iqc  fuch  a  Sight  of  my  felf,  as  made  me  appear  very  vile  in  my 
own  Eyes  :  I  felt  Corruption  ftirring  in  my  Heart,  which  I  could 
by  no  Means  fupprefs  :  felt  more  and  more  dcferted  :  was  ex-- 
cccdipg  weak,  and  almoft  Tick  with  my  inward  Trials. 

Monday 


i£'/.  25.     of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 742:      ^i^ 

Monday,  Ma^  3,  Flad  a  Senfe  of  vile  Ingratitude.  In  the 
Morning  I  withdrew  to  my  ufual  Place  of  Retirement,  and 
mourned  for  my  Abufc  of  my  dear  Lord  :  fpent  the  Day  in 
Fading  and  Prayer  :  God  gave  me  much  Power  of  wreftling 
for  his  Caufe  and  Kingdom  :  And  it  was  a  happy  Day  to  my 
Soul.  God  was  with  me  all  the  Day,  and  I  was  more  above 
the  World,  than  ever  in  my  Life, 

[Through  the  remaining  Part  of  this  Week,  he  complains 
almoft  every  Day  of  Defertion  and  inward  Trials  and  Confli6ls, 
attended  with  dejedlion  of  Spirit  5  but  yet  fpeaks  of  Times  of 
Relief  and  Swe^tnefs,  and  daily  refrefhing  Vifits  of  the  divine 
Spirit,  afFording  fpccial  Alliftance  and  Comfort,  and  enabling,  at 
ibme  Times,  to  much  Fervency  and  Enlargement  in  religious 
Duties.] 

Lord*s-Day,  iT/jy  9.  I  think,  I  never  felt  fo  much  of  the 
curfed  Pride  of  my  Heart,  as  well  as  the  Stubbornnefs  of  my 
Will  before.  Oh  dreadful  I  what  a  vile  Wretch  I  am  !  I 
could  not  fubmit  to  be  nothing,  and  to  lie  down  in  the  Duft  \ 
Oh  that  God  would  humble  me  in  the  Duft.  I  fek  my  felt 
fuch  a  Sinner,  nil  Day,  that  I  had  fcarce  any  Comfort.  Oh, 
when  (hall  I  be  delivered  from  the  Body  of  this  Death  !  I  greatly 
fear*d,  left  thro*  Stupidity  and  Carelefnefs  I  ihould  lofe  the 
Benefit  of  thefe  Trials.  O  that  they  might  be  fandified  to 
my  Soul.  Nothing  feemed  to  touch  me  but  only  this,  that  f 
was  a  Sinner.  —  Had  Fervency  and  Refrefliment  in  fjcial 
Prayer  in  the  Evening. 

Monday,  May  10.  Rode  to  A^^ty-iij^/^zr;  fawfomeChriftian 
Friends  there  ^  hadComfort  in  joining  inPrayer  with  them, and 
hearing  of  the  Goodnefs  of  God  to  them  fmce  I  laft  faw  them. 

Tuefday,  May  ir.  Ko^q  Uom  New- Haven  XoPf^eat  ben  field -, 
was  very  dull  moft  of  the  Day  ;  had  litcle  Spirituality  in  this 
Journey,  tho'  I  often  longed  to  be  alone  with  God  ;  was  much 
perplexed  with  vile  Thoughts  ;  was  fometimes  afraid  of  every 
Thing  :  But  God  was  my  Hdper,--'  Catch'd  a  little  Time  for 
Retirement  in  the  Evening,  to  my  Comfort  and  Rcjoycing. 
Alas,  I  can't  live  in  the  midft  of  a  Tumult  !  I  bng  to  enjoy 
God  alone. 

Wedncfday,  Ma^  12.  Had  a  diftreffing  View  of  the  Pride 
and  Enmity  and  ViJenefs  of  my  Heart. —  Afterwards  bad  fweet 
Refrefliment  IQ  cgnverfingj  1%  Wftri^'pping  ^^^y  withChriftian 

T/jurfJay, 


g2      Mt.  25.         sra^  L  I  F  E  A.D:  x74i?: 

Thtirfday,  May  13.  Saw  fo  much  of  the  Wickednefs  of  my 
Heart,  that  I  longed  to  get  away  from  my  felf.  1  never  before 
thought,  there  was  fo  much  fpiritual  Pride  in  my  Soul  :  I  felt 
almoft  prefs'd  to  Death  with  my  own  Vilencfs.  Oh,  what  a 
Body  of  Death  is  there  in  me  !  Lord,  deliver  my  SouL  I  eould 
not  find  any  convenient  Place  for  Retirement,  and  was  greatly 
cxercifed.— Rode  to  Hartford  in  the  Afternoon  :  had  fomeRe- 
frefhment  and  Comfort  in  religious  Exercifes  with  Chriftian 
Friends  ;  but  longed  for  moreRetirement.  O  the  clofefl Walk 
ivithGod  is  the  fweeteftHeaven,that  can  be  enjoyM  on  Earth  \ 

Friday,  May  14.  Waited  on  a  Council  of  Minifters  con- 
vened at  Hartford,  and  fpread  before  them  the  Treatment  I  had 
met  with  from  the  Redlor  and  Tutors  of  Tale- College  y  who 
thought  it  advifeable  to  interceed  for  me  with  the  Re£tor  and 
Truftees,  and  to  intreat  them  to  reftore  me  to  my  former  Pri- 
vileges in  College,  t  "--  After  this,  fpent  fome  Time  in  reli- 
gious Exercifes  with  Chriftian  Friends. 

Saturday,  May  15,  Rode  from  Hartford  to  Hebron  5  was 
fomething  deje(^ed  on  the  Road  ;  appeared  exceeding  vile  in 
my  own  Eyes,  faw  much  Pride  and  Stubbornnefs  in  my  Heart. 
Indeed  I  never  faw  fuch  a  Week  before,  as  this  ;  for  I  have 
been  almoft  ready  to  die  with  the  View  of  the  Wickednefs  of 
i^y  Heart.  I  could  not  have  thought  I  had  fuch  a  Body  of  Death 
in  me.     Oh  that  God  vv^ould  deliver  my  SouL 

[The  three  next  Days  (which  he  fpent  at  Helron,  Lebanon^ 
and  Norwich)  he  complains  ftill  of  Dulnefs  and  Defertion,  and 
exprefies  a  Sciifc  of  his  Vilenefs,  and  longing  to  hide  himfelf  in 
ibme  Cave  or  Den  of  the  Earth  :  But  yet  fpeaks  of  fome  Inter- 
vals of  Comfort  and  Soul-Refrefhment  each  Day.] 

Wednefday,  AJay  19,  [At  Millington]  I  Was  fo  amazingly 
defertcd  this  iMoming,  that  I  feem'd  to  feci  a  Sort  of  Horror 
in  my  Soul.  Alas,  v^-hcn  God  withdiaws,what  is  there  that  cart 
afford  any  Comfort  to  the  Soul  I 

[Through  the  eight  Days  next  following,  he  exprefTes  more 
Calmnefs  and  Ct  ci'ort,  and  confiderable  Likf  Fervency  and 
Sweetnefs  in  Religion,] 


f  The  Ap[!!icat;rrn  which  was  then  made  01?  his  Behalf,  had 
not  the  si^iircd  Succcf*r 

Ffidayj 


:^/.  25.     e?/ Mr*.  David  firaincrd    A.D:i^42.    33 

Friday,  May  28.  [At  N^w-Haven-]  I  think,  I  fcarce  ever  felt 
fo  calm  in  my  Life  ;  I  rejoyced  in  Refignation,  and  giving 
toy  felf  up  to  God,  to  be  wholly  and  intirely  devoted  to  him 
forever. 

f  On  the  three  folbwing  Days,  there  was,  by  the  Account 
he  gives,  a  ContinaanCe  of  the  fame  excellent  Frame  of  Mind 
!aft  expreffed :  But  it  feems  not  to  be  altogether  to  fo  great 
a  Degree.] 

Tuefday,  Jafte  i.  Had  much  of  the  Prefence  of  God  in 
Family-Prayer,and  had  foitie  Comfort  in  Secret.  I  was  greatly 
refrefhed  from  the  Word  of  God,  thisMorning,  which  appear'd 
exceeding  fweet  to  me  :  feme  Things  that  appear'd  myfterious, 
were  opened  to  me.  O  that  the  Kingdom  of  the  dear  Saviour 
might  come  with  Power,  and  the  healing  PFaters  of  the  SanSfuary 
fpread  far  and  wide  for  the  Healing  of  the  Nations,  —  Came  to 
Ripton  ;  but  was  very  weak  :  However,  being  vifited  by  a 
Number  of  young  People  in  the  Evening,  I  pray'd  with  thera* 

[The  remaining  Part  of  this  Week,  be  fpeaks  of  being  much 
diverted  and  hindered  in  the  Bufinefs  of  Religion,  by  great 
Weaknefs  of  Body,  and  necefiary  Affairs,  that  he  had  to  at^- 
tend,  and  complains  of  having  but  little  Power  in  Religion  j 
But  fignifies,  that  God  hereby  fhewed  him,  He  was  like  a  help- 
lefs  Infant  caft  out  in  the  open  Field.] 

Lord's- Day,  June  6. —  I  feel  much  defer  ted  :  But  all  this 
teaches  me  my  Nothingnefs  and  Vilenefs  more  than  ever. 

Monday,  June  7,  Felt  ftill  powerlcfs  in  fecret  Prayer.— 
Afterwards  I  pray'd,and  converfed,  with  fome  little  Life.  God 
feeds  me  with  Ciumhs  :  BlefTed  be  his  Name  for  any  Thing. 
I  felt  a  great  Defire,  that  all  God's  People  might  know  how 
mean  and  little  and  vile  I  am  ;  that  they  might  fee  I  am  nothing, 
that  fo  they  may  pray  for  me  aright,  and  not  have  the  leaft 
Dependance  upon  me. 

Tuefdjy,  June  8.  I  enjoyed  one  fweet  and  precious  Seafon 
this  Day  :  I  never  felt  it  fo  fweet  to  be  nothing,  and  lefs  than 
nothing,   and  to  be  accounted  nothing. 

[The  three  ne^^t  Days  lie  complains  of  Defertlon,  and  Wairt 
of  tcrvency  in  Religion  5    but  yet  his  Diary  fhews  that  every 
Day  his  Heart  was  engaged  in  Rcligipn,  as  bis  great  and  as  it 
were  Qjily  Bufhicfs.] 
"  -  F  Saturdaj'a 


34 


^/.25:  "^ixi  LIFE         A.D.17^2: 


Saturday,  June  12.  Spfent  much  Time  in  Prayer,  thisMorn* 
ing,  and  enjoyed  much  Sweetnefs  :  —  Felt  infatiable  Longings 
after  God,  much  of  the  Day  :  1  wonder *d  how  poor  Souls  do 
to  live,  that  have  no  God*—  The  World,  with  all  its  Enjoy- 
ments, quite  vanifhed.  I  fee  my  felf  very  helplefs  :  but  I  have 
a  blefled  God,  to  go  to.  1  long*d  exceedingly  to  be  dijfolvidy 
and  to  be  ivith  Chri/i^  to  behold  his  Glory,  Oh,  my  weak  weary 
Soul  longs  to  arrive  at  my  Father's  Houje  ! 

Lor d's^ Day,  June  13,  Felt  fomething  calm  and  refigned  in 
the  publick  Worfliip  :  At  the  Sacrament  faw  my  felf  very  vile 
and  worthlefs.  O  that  I  may  always  lie  low  in  the  Duft.  My 
Soul  feemed  fteadily  to  go  forth  after  GOD,  in  longing  Defires 
to  live  upon  him. 

Monday,  'June  14.,  Felt  fomething  of  the  Sweetnefs  of  Com- 
rnunion  with  God,  and  the  con/iraining  Force  of  his  Love  : 
How  admirably  it  captivates  the  Soul,  and  makes  all  the  Defires 
and  AfFedtions  to  center  m  God  I  -—  I  fet  apart  this  Day  for  fe- 
cret  Fafting  and  Prayer,  to  intreat  God  to  diredl  and  blefs  me 
ivith  Regard  to  the  great  Work  I  have  in  View,  of  Preaching 
the  Gojpei ;  and  that  the  Lord  would  return  to  me  and  /hew  me 
the  Light  of  his  Countenance,  Had  little  Life  and  Power  in  the 
Torenoon  :  Near  the  middle  of  the  Afternoon,  God  enabled  me 
to  wreftle  ardently  in  Interceflion  for  abfent  Friends:— But  juft 
at  Night,  the  Lord  vifited  memarvelloufly  in  Prayer  ;  I  think, 
my  Soul  never  was  in  fuch  anAgony  before :  I  feltnoReftrainC ; 
for  the  Treafures  of  divineGrace  were  opened  to  me  :  I  wreftled 
for  abfent  Friends,  for  the  Ingathering  of  Souls,  for  Multitudes 
of  poor  Souls,  and  for  many  that  I  thought  were  the  Children 
oi  God,  perfonally,  in  many  diftant  Places.  I  was  in  fuch  an 
i^gony,  from  Sun  half  an  Hour  high,  'till  near  Dark,  that  I  was 
all  over  wet  with  Sweat  ;  but  yet  h  feem*d  to  me  that  I  had 
nvaftcd  away  the  Day,  and  had  done  nothing..  Oh,  my  dear 
Jesus  did yif^^f  jS/W for  poor  Souls  I  I  long  for  more  Com- 
paffion  towards  them.-—  Felt  ftill  in  a  fweet  Frame,  under  a 
Senfe  of  divine  Love  and  Grace  ;  and  went  to  Bed  in  fuch  a 
J:^rame,  with  my  Heart  fet  on  God. 

Tuefday,  June  15.  Had  the  moft  ardent  Longings  after 
God,  that  ever  I  felt  m  ray  Life  :  At  Noon,  in  my  fecret  Re- 
;tirement,  I  could  do  nothing  but  tell  my  dear  Lord,  ia  a  fweet 
Calm,  that  he  knew  1  longed  for  nothing  but  Himfelf^  nothing 
but  HoUfiejs  ;  Thiit  He  had  given  me  ihefe  Defires,  and  He 
'tnly  could  give  me  the  Thing  defired.  I  never  feem*d  to  be  fo 
iinhin^Qd  from  my  felf,  and  to  be  i"o  wholly  dcvol^d  to  God, 


Mt.  25;    «/  Mr.  David  Braincrd.    A.D.  1742:    35 

My  Heart  was  fwallowed  up  in  God,  moft  of  the  Day.  In  the 
Evening  Ihadfuch  aViewof  theSoul's  being  as  it  were  enlarged, 
to  contain  more  Holinefs,  that  my  Soul  feem'd  ready  to  feparatc 
from  my  Body,  and  ftretch  to  obtain  it.  I  then  wreftled  in  an 
Agony  for  divine  Bleifings  ;  had  my  Heart  drawn  out  in  Prayec 
for  fomeChriftian  Friends,  beyond  what  I  ever  had  before.— I 
feel  diiFerently  novr  from  what  evfer  I  did  under  any  fweei  En- 
joyments before,  more  engaged  to  Uve  to  GOD  for  ever,  and 
lefs  pleafed  with  my  own  Frames :  I  am  not  f^tisfied  with  my 
Frames,  nor  feel  at  all  more  eafy  after  fuch  fvveet  Strugglings 
than  before  ;  for  it  feems  far  too  little,  iff  could  always  be  fo. 
Oh,  how  fhort  do  I  fall  of  my  Duty  in  my  fweeteli  Moments ! 

[In  his  Diary  for  the  two  next  Days,  he  expreiTcs  ibmething 
of  the  fame  Frame,  but  in  a  far  lefs  Degree.  *] 

Friday,  June  18.  Confidering  my  great  Unfitnefs  for  the 
Work  of  the  Minijiry^  my  prefent  Deadne/s,  and  total  Inability 
to  do  any  Thing  for  the  Glory  of  God  tbatWay,  feeling  my  idi 
very  helplefs,  and  at  a  great  Lofs  what  the  Lord  would  have  me 
to  do^  I  fet  apart  this  Day  for  Prayer  to  God,  and  fptnt  moft 
of  the  Day  in  that  Duty  ;  but  amazingly  deferted,  moft  of  the 
Day  :  yet  I  found  God  gracioufly  near,  cnce  in  particular, 
while  \  was  pleading  for  more  CompaiTion  for  immortal  Souls, 
my  Heart  feem'd  to  be  cpen'd  at  once,  and  I  was  enabled  ro  cry 
with  great  Ardency,  for  a  few  Minutes. ---Oh,  I  was  diftrefs'd, 
to  think,  that  I  fhould  offer  fuch  dead  cold  Services  to  the  living 
God!  My  Soul  feem'd  to  breathe  after  Holinefs,  a  Life  of 
conftant  Devotednefs  to  God.  But  I  am  almoft  lort  ftmetimes 
in  the  purfuit  of  this  Bleffednefs,  and  ready  to  fink,  bccaufe  1 
continually  fall  fliort  and  mifs  of  my  Defire.  O  that  iheLoid 
would  help  me  to  holdout,  yet  a  littfe  while,  'till  the  happy 
Hour  of  Deliverance  com&s. 

Saturday,  June  19.  Felt  much  difordered  ;  my  Spirits  were 
very  low  :  but  yet  enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and  Sweetnefs  in  the 
Duties  of  Religion.     Bleffed  be  God. 


*  Here  end  the  30  firft  Pages  of  the  third  Volume  of  his 
Diary,  which  he  fpeaks  of  in  the  Beginning  of  thisVolume 
(as  was  obferved  before)  as  containing  a  Specimen  o#  his 
ordinary  Manner  of  living,  thro'  the  whole  Space  of  Time, 
kom  iheBcginning  of  thofe  two  Volumes  that  were  dcftroy'd. 
°  •  F2  Lord's- 


^^ G     jEt.  IS.  «^  L I F E  A.D;  1 742: 

LordVDay,  June  20.  5pent  much  Time  alone.— My  Soul 
longed  to  be  holy,  and  reach*d  after  God  ;  tut  feem*(J  not  to 
obtain  my  Defirc  :  I  hungred  and  thirfted  ;  but  was  not  fweetly 
refrefh'd  and  fatisfied.  My  Som\  hung  on  God,  as  my  cnljr 
Portion.  O  that  I  could  grow  in  Grace  more  abundantly 
every  Day. 

[The  nextDay  he  fpeaks  of  his  having  Afliftance  ip  his^tudiies^ 
^nd  Power,  Fervency  and  Comfort  in  Prayer.] 

Tuefday,  June  22.  In  the  Morning,  fpent  abput  twoHourg 
in  Prayer  and  Meditation,  wlthconfiderable  Delight.  Towards 
Night,  felt  my  Soul  go  out  in  longing  Defires  after  God,  in  fe- 
cret  Retirement.  In  the  Evening,  was  fweetly  compofed  and 
yefigned  to  God's  Will ;  was  enabled  to  leave  my  felf  and  all  my 
Concerns  with  Him,  and  to  have  my  whole  Dependance  upon 
Him  :  mv  fecret  Retirement  was  very  refrefhmg  to  my  Soul  ; 
It  appeared  iuch  a  Kappinefs  to  have  God  for  my  Portion,  that  I 
Jiad  rather  be  any  other  Creature  in  this  lower  Creation,  than 
rot  co.me  to  the  Enjoyment  of  God  :  I  had  rather  be  a  Beaft^ 
than  a  Man,  without  God,  if  I  were  to  live  here  to  Eterpity, 
jLord,  endear  thy  felf  more  to  me. 

[In  his  Diary  for  the  next  feven  Days,  he  e^prefles  a  variety 
of  Exercifes  of  Mind  :  He  fpeaks  of  great  Longings  after  God 
and  Holinefs,  and  earnelt  Defires  for  the  Converfionof  others^ 
of  Fervency  in  Prayer,  and  Power  to  wreftle  with  God,  and  of 
Compofure,  Comfort  and  ^weetnefs,  from  Time  to  Time  j 
but  exprefTes  a  Senfe  of  the  vile  Abomination  of  his  Heart,  and 
bitterly  complains  of  hii  Barrenncfs,  and  the  preifing  Body  of 
Death  ;  and  fays,  he  ^flw  clearly,  thai  whatever  he  enjoyed^ 
petter  than  H^liy  was  free  Grace  :  Complaips  of  his  being  e;j- 
ceeding  low,  much  below  the  Character  of  a  Child  of  God  s 
and  is  fomeiiiTies  very  difconfolate  and  dgciSled.] 


Wcdnefday,  Jum  30.  Spent  this  Day  ^lone  in  the  Woods, 
|n  Parting  and  Prayer  ;  underwent  the  molt  dreadful  Conflid^s 
in  my  Soul,  that  ever  I  felt,  in  fome  RefpeiSls  :  \  faw  my  felf  (q 
vile,  that  I  was  ready  to  fay,  J  Jhallnoiv  perijh  by  the  Hand  of 
Saul..-—  I  thought,  and  almoft  concluded,  I  had  no  Power  to 
ifand  for  the  Caufe  of  God,  but  was  almoft  afraid  of  the  fl)aking 
of  a  Leaf,  Spent  almoft  the  whole  Day  in  Prayer,  inceflantly.. 
I  fGuU  noi  b-ar  to  think  uf  Chriftians  (hewing  me  any  |lcfpea-, 


JE(.  2^.       c/ iWr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742.    oj 

I  almoft  defpaired  of  doing  any  Service  in  the  World  :  I  could 
not  feel  anyHope  or  Comfort,rerpe£ling  the  Heat  hen  ^whkh  ufed 
to  afford  me  fome  Refrefbment  in  the  darkeft  Hours  of  this  Na- 
^ture.  I  fpent  away  the  Day  in  the  Sitternefs  of  my  Soul,  Near 
Night,  I  felt  a  little  better  j  and  afterwards  enjoyed  fome  SweeV 
nefs  in  fecret  Prayer. 

Thurfday,  ^uly  i.  Had  fomeSweetnefs  in  Prayer,  this  Morn- 
ing.—Felt  exceeding  fweetly  in  fecreiPrayer  toNi^ht,&  dcfircd 
nothing  fo  ardently  as  that  GodJJioulddo  with  mejuji  as  hepieafed, 

Friday,  yuly  2.  Felt  compofed  in  fecret  Prayer,  in  the  Morn- 
ing.— My  Defires  fweetly  afcended  to  God  this  Ddy,  as  I  was 
travelling  :  and  was  comfortable  in  the  Evening.  BleiTed  be 
God  for  all  my  Confolations. 

Saturday,  ^uly  3.    My  Heart  feemed  again  to  fink.  TheDif- 

grace  I  was  laid  under  at  College,  feemed  to  damp  me,  as  it  opens 

the  Mouths  of  Oppofers.     I  had  no  Refuge   but  in  God  only. 

BlefTed  be  his  Name,  that  I  may  go  to  Him  at  all  Times,  and 

Jind  him  zprefent  Help. 

Lord's-Day,  y«/y  4,  Had  confiderable  A/fiftance.  In  theE- 
vening,  T  withdrew  and  enjoyed  a  happy  Seafon  in  fecretPrayer : 
God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  the  Esercife  of  Faith,  and  thereby 
brought  the  invifible  and  eternal  World  near  to  my  Soul  ;  which 
appeared  fweetly  to  me.  I  hoped,  that  my  weary  Pilgrimage  in 
the  World  would  be  Jbirt,  and  that  it  would  not  be  long  before 
I  was  brought  to  my  heavenly  Home  and  Father'sHoufe  :  I  was 
fweetly  refigned  to  God's  Will,  to  tarry  his  Time,  to  do  his 
Work,  and  fufFer  his  Pleafurc  I  felt  Thankfulnefs  to  God  for 
all  ray  prcffing  Defertiom  of  late  ;  for  I  am  perfwaded,  they 
liave  been  made  a  Means  of  making  me  more  humble, and  mtich 
more  refign'd.  I  felt  pleafed,  to  be  Uitlej  to  ht  nothing,  and  vt 
fie  in  the  DujL  I  enjoy'd  Life  and  fweet  Confolation  in  plead- 
ing for  the  dear  Children  of  God,  and  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift 
in  the  World  :  and  my  Soul  earneftly  breathed  afterHolinefs  and 
the  Enjoynient  of  God.  Q  com  Lor4  Je^us  !  Gome  quickly* 
Amen. 

[  By  his  Diary  for  the  remaining  Days  of  this  Week,  it  appears 
that  he  enjoyed  confiderable  Compofure  and  Tranouillity,  and 
had  Sweetnefs  and  Fervency  of  Spirit  in  Prayer,    Irom  Day  to 

Lords-Day,  Jul^  11.  Was  deferted  ahd  exceeding  dejeaed  \n 
the  Morning. —  In  theAfternoon,  had  fome  Life  and  AfTiflance^ 
fh^ii  fsit  refigticd  ;  I  favy  "^^  ^?lf  cxceediflg  vile^ 


'38      ^/.  25.  r^^LlFE  A.D.i74i; 

fbn  the  two  next  Days  he  exprefTes  inward  Comfort,  Refig^ 
nation,  and  Strength  in  God.] 

Wednefday^ya^  14.  Felt  a  Kind  of  humble  refigned  Sweet- 
nefs  :  Spent  a  confiderable  Time  in  Secret,  giving  my  felf  up 
wholly  to  theLord.—  Heard  Mr.  Bellamy  preach, to wardsNighl: 
felt  very  Sweetly,  part  of  the  Time  :  Longed  for  nearer  acctfi  U 
God. 

[The  four  next  Days,  he  exprefTes  confiderable  Comfort  and 
Fervency  of  Spirit  in  ChriftianConverfation  and  Religious  Exer- 
cifes.  ] 

Monday,  July  ig.  My  Defires  feem  efpecially  to  be  carried 
out  after  Wcanednefs  from  the  Worlds  perfe£t  Dead  nefs  to  it, and 
to  be  even  crucified  to  all  its  Allurements.  My  Soul  longs  to  feel 
it  uilf  more  of  a  Pilgrim  and  Stranger  here  below  ;  that  nothing 
may  divert  me  from  preffing  through  the  lonely  Defart,  'till  I 
arrivj  at  my  Father's  fioufe. 

Tuefday,  July  20.  It  was  fweet, to  give  away  my  felf  toGoD, 
to  bedifpofed  of  at  his  Pleafure  ;  and  had  fome  feeling  Senfe  of 
the  Sweetnefs  of  being  a  Pilgrim  en  Earth. 

[The  nextDay,he  exprefleshimfelf  as  determined  to  be  wholly 
devoted  to  God  ;  and  it  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  ho  fpent  the 
whole  Day  in  a  moft  diligent  Exercife  of  Religion,  and  exceed- 
ing comfortably,] 

Thurfday,  July  22.  Journeying  from  Southbury  to  Ripiotty 
called  at  aHoufe  by  the  Way,  where  being  very  kindly  entertain'd 
and  refiefh^d,  I  was  fiU'd  with  Amazement  and  Shame,  that 
God  fliould  (tir  up  the  Hearts  of  any  to  fhew  fo  much  Kindnefs 
to  ftch  a  dead  Dog  as  1  ;  was  made  ferdible,  in  fome  Meafure, 
how  exceeding  vile  it  is,  not  to  be  wholly  devoted  to  God.  I 
wcnder'd,  that  God  would  fufFer  any  of  his  Creatures  to  feed  and 
fuftain  me,  from  Time  to  Time. 

[  In  his  Diary  for  the  fix  next  Days,  are  expreffed  various 
Exercifes  and  Experiences,  fuch  as  fweet  Com pofu re  and  Fer- 
vency of  Spirit  in  Meditation  and  Prayer,  Weanednefs  from  the 
World,  being  fenfibly  a  Pilgrim  and  Stranger  on  the  Earth, 
Engagednefs  of  Mind  to  fpend  every  Inch  of  Time  forGod,^^.] 

I'hurfday,  July,  29.  Was  examined  by  the  Aflbciation  met 
at  Danbury^zs  to  my  Learning,  and  alfomy  Experiences^  Re- 
ligion, awd  received  a  Licence  from  them  to  preach  the  (Jrofpel 
of  Chrift.---  Afterwards  felt  much  devoted  to  God  ;  join'd  in 
Prayer  with  one  of  the  Minifters,  my  peculiar  Friend,  in  a 
convenient  Place  5  went  to  Bed  refolving  to  live  devoted  toGod 
all  my  Days. 

pari; 


^/.2j.-      e/Afr.  David   Brainerd,     AD.  1742:     3^ 
Part     III. 


mmmm 


From  the  "Time  of  his  being  licenfed  to  preachy 
by  the  Affociation,  '////  he  was  examined 
in  New- York,  by  the  Correfpondents  or 
CommiJJioners  of  the  Society  in  Scotland 
for  propagating  Chriflian  Knowledge^ 
and  approved  and  appointed  as  their 
Miflionary  to  the  Indians. 

FRiday,  July  ^O-  1742.  Rode  from  Danhury  to  Southhury  ; 
Preach'd  there  from  iPet.'w.  8.  Had  much  of  the  comfor- 
table Prefence  of  God  in  the  Exercife  :  1  feem'u  to  have 
Power  withGod  in  Prayer,  and  Power  to  get  hold  of  the  Hearts 
of  the  People  in  Preaching. 

Saturday,  July  31.  Exceeding  calm  and  compafed,  and  was 
greatly  refrefhed  and  encouraged. 

[  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  he  continued  in  this  Sweetnefs 
and  Tranquillity,  almoft  through  the  whole  of  the  next  Week.] 

Lord's-Day,  Jug.  8-  In  the  Morning  felt  comfortably  in  fe- 
cret  Prayer  ;  my  Soul  was  refrefh'a  with  the  Hopes  of  the  Bia- 
//^^«j  coming  home  to  Chrifl  ;  was  much  refigned  to  God,  f 
thought  it  was  no  Matter  what  became  of  me.  —  Preacn'd  both 
Parts  of  the  Day  at  Bethlehem,  from  Job  xiv.  14.  It  was  fweet  to 
me  to  meditate  on  Death.  In  the  Evening,  felt  very  comforta- 
bly, and  cried  to  God  fervently,  in  fccret  Pra}cr. 

[  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  he  continued  thro'  the  three 
nexiDays,  engaged  with  all  his  Might  in  the  Bufinefs  of  Religi- 
gn,  and  1-n  almoft  a  conflant  Enjovmeut  of  the  Comfoits  of  11.] 

Thu'fday 


io    ^/.  25.  ^16^  L I F  E  .  A.D. 1 742: 

Thuifday,  v^/zfJ^y?  12.  This  Morning  and  laft  Night  was  ex- 
ercifed  with  fore  inward  Trials  :  I  had  no  Power  to  pray  ;  but 
Icemed  (hut  out  from  God.  I  had  in  a  great  Meafure  loft  mf 
Hopes  of  God *s  fending  me  among  the  Heathen  afar  off,  and 
of  feeing  them  fl  ck  home  to  Chrift.  I  (aw  fo  much  of  my  hellifh 
Vilenefs,  that  i  appeared  worfe  to  my  felf,  than  any  Devil :  I 
wonder'd,  that  God  would  let  me  live,  and  wondered  that  Peo- 
ple did  not  ftone  me,  much  more,  that  they  would  ever  hear  me 
preach  f  It  feem'd  as  tho'  I  never  could  nor  fhould  preach  an)? 
more,  yet  about  9  or  10  o'Clock,  the  People  came  over,  and  I 
was  forced  to  preach  :  And  blefied  be  God,  he  gave  me  his  Pre- 
fenceand  Spirit  in  Prayer  and  Preaching  :  So  that  I  was  much 
aflifted,  and  fpake  with  Power  from  Job  xiv.  14.  5orne  Indians 
cry'd  out  in  great  Diftrefs,  *  and  all  appeared  greatly  concerned. 
After  We  had  pray'd  and  exhorted  them  to  feek  the  Lord  with 
Conftancy,  and  hired  an  EngUfh  Woman  to  keep  a  Kind  of 
SchooUmong  them,  we  came  away  about  one  o'Clock,and  came 
to  y«<^^fi, about  15  or  16  Miles,  There  God  was  pleafed  to  vifk 
my  5oul  with  mi^h  Comfort.  BlelTcd  bt  the  Lord  for  allThings 
Imect  with. 

[  It  appears,  that  the  two  next  Days  he  had  much  Comfort^ 
and  had  his  Heart  much  engaged  in  Religion.  J 

Lords"Day,  Jugu/i  13.  Felt  much  Comfort  and  Devotednefs 
to  God  this  Day.  At  Nigbt,  it  was  refreftiing,  to  get  alone  with 
GoD  and  pour  out  my  Soul.  O,  who  can  conceive  of  the  Sweet- 
nefs  of  Communion  with  the  blefled  God,  but  thofe  that  have 
Experience  of  it  f  Glory  to  God  forever,  that  I  may  tafte  Hea- 
ven below. 

Monday,  J^ugujl  16.  Had  fome  Cornfort  in  fecret  Prayer,  \n. 
the  Morning  :--  Felt  fweetly  fundry  Times  in  Prayer  this  Day  : 
But  was  much  perplexed  in  the  Evening  with  vain  Converfation* 

Tuefday,  Auguft  ij.  Exceedingly  deprefs'd  in  Spirit,  It  cuts 
and  wounds  my  Heart,  to  think  how  much  Self- Exaltation^Spi" 
ritual  Pride^hUaynith  cf  Temper ^\  \\zsz  formerly  had  interming'- 
led  with  my  Endeavours  to  promote  (jod's  Work  :  And  fome- 
times!  long  to  lie  down  at  the  Feetof  Oppofers,and  confcfs  what 
a  poor  imperfe£l:  Creature  1  have  been  and   ftill  am.--  Ob,  the 


*  It  was  in  a  Place  near  Kent^  in  the  Wefiern  Borders  of  Con- 

ihcje  is  a  N'jniberof /-T.'/ijv;. 


Mt.  2S.    <?/ Mr.  David  Brainfrd.     A.D.1742.     41 

Lord  forgive  me,  and  make  me  for  the  iMi\xrtioife  as  a  Serttnt 
and  harmlefi  as  a  Dove. — Afterwards  enjoy 'd  confiderab^e  Com- 
fort and  Delight  of  Soul. 

Wednefday,  Auguft  18.  Spent  moft  of  this  Day  in  Prayer  and 
Reading.— I  fee  fo  much  of  my  own  extrcam  Vilenefs,  that  I 
feel  afhamed  and  guilty  before  God  and  Man  :  I  look,  to  my 
fclf,  like  the  vileft  Fellow  in  the  Land  :  \  wonder,  that  God  ftirs 
up  his  People  to  be  fo  kind  to  me. 

Thurfday,  Auguft  19.  This  Day,  being  about  to  go  from 
Mr.  Bellamy*s  at  Buhlehem^  where  I  had  refided  fome  Time, 
prayM  with  him,  and  two  or  three  other  Chriftian  Friends,  and 
gave  our  felves  to  God  with  all  our  Hearts,  to  be  his  for  ever : 
Eternity  looked  very  near  to  mc,  while  I  was  praying.  If  I 
never  fhould  fee  thefe  Chriftians  again  in  this  World,  it  feem*d 
but  a  fewMoments  before  I  fhould  meet  *em  in  another  World.— 
Parted  with  them  fweetly. 

Friday,  Auguji  20.  I  appeared  fo  vile  to  my  felf,that  I  hardly 
dared  to  think  of  being  feen,  efpeciaily  on  Account  of  fpiritual 
Pride.  However,  to  Night,  I  enjoyed  a  fweet  Hour  alone  with 
God  [at  Ripton]  I  was  lifted  above  the  Frowns  and  Flatteries  of 
this  lower  World,  had  a  fweet  Relifh  of  heavenly  Joys,  and  my 
Soul  did  as  it  were  get  into  the  eternal  World,  and  really  tafte 
of  Heaven.  I  had  a  fweet  Seafon  of  IntercefTion  for  dearFriends 
in  Chrift  ;  andGod  helped  me  to  cry  fervently  for  Zion,  BlefTed 
be  God  for  this  Seafon. 

Saturday,  Auguft  21.  Was  much  perplex'd,in  iheMorning.— 
Towards  Noon  enjoyed  more  of  God  in  fecret,  was  enabled  to 
fee  that  it  was  beft  to  throw  my  felf  into  the  Hands  of  God,  to 
be  difpofed  of  according  to  his  Pleafure,  and  rcjoyced  in  fuch 
Thoughts.  In  the  Afternoon, rode  to  New- Haven  ;  was  much 
confufed  all  the  Way. —  Juft  at  Night,  underwent  fuch  a  dread*- 
ful  Confli£l,  as  I  have  fcarcc  ever  felt.  I  faw  my  felf  exceed* 
ing  vile  and  unworthy  ;  fo  that  I  was  guilty,  and  afhamed,  that 
any  Body  (hould  beftow  any  Favour  on  me,  or  flicw  me  any 
Refpea. 

Lord's- Day,  AuguJ}  22.  In  the  Morning,  continued  ftill 
in  Perplexity.—  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  that  Comfort  that 
feemM  to  me  fufficknt  to  ovcr-ballance  all  my  late  DiftrelTcs. 
I  faw,  that  God  is  the  only  Soul-fatisfymg  Portion,  and  I  really 
foand  Satisfadion  in  him  :  My  Soul  was  much  enlarged  in 
fweet  Interceflion  for  my  Fellow-Men  every  where,  and  for 
m^ny  Chriftian  Fri^^iids,  in  particular,  in  diftant  Places. 

G  Monday, 


42    >€/.  2  5.  TheAAFE  A.D.f742;; 


* 


Monday,  Auguji  23.  Had  a  fweet  S^afon  in  fecret  Prayer  V 
The  Lord  drew  near.tp  my  Soul,  and  filled  me  with  Peace  arf^ 
divine  Confolation.  O,  my  Soul  tafted  the  Sweetnefs  of  th<S 
upper  World  \  and  was  fweetly  drawn  out  in  Prayer  for  tiie 
World, that  it  mig^t  eome  home  toChrift  !  Had  much  Comfert 
in  the  Thoughts  and  Hopes  ^^  the  In^a5l>ering  of  the  Heathtn  } 
^as  greatly  aflided  in  loiereeiTion  for  Chriftjan  Friends. 

[He  confirjued  ft  ill  in  the  fame  Frame  of  Mind  the  next  Day, 
but  in  a  leiier  Degree.] 

Wednefday,  j^ugu^  2^.  In  Family-Prayer,  God  helped  me 
to  climb  up  Hear  Him,  fo  that  I  fcarce  ever  got  nearsr. 

[The  four  next  Days,  he  appears  to  have  been  the  SubjecEl 
of  Defertion,  and  of  Comfort  and  Fervency  in  Religion, inter- 
changeably, together  with  a  Seafe  of  Vilenefa  and  Unprofita- 
blenels.] 

Monday,  Auguft  30.  Felt  fomething  eomfortably  in  the 
Morning  ;  converfed  fweetly  with  fome  Friends  ;  was  in  a  fe- 
tious  campofed  Frame  ;  pray'd  at  a  certain  Houfe  with  fome 
Degree  of  Sweetnefs.  Afterwards,  at  another  Houfe,  pray'd 
pi'ivately  with  a  dear  Chriftian  Friend  or  two  ;  and  I  think,  I 
fcarce  ever  launch'd  fo  hx  into  the  eteraal  World,  as  then  ;  I 
got  fo  far  out  on  the  broad  Ocean,  that  my  Soul  with  Joy  tri- 
umphed over  all  the  Evils  on  the  Shores  of  Mortality.  I  think. 
Time  and  ail  its  gay  Amufements  and  cruel  Difappointments, 
rievcr  appeared  fo  inconfiderable  to  me  before  :  I  was  in  a  fweet 
Frame  ;  I  h^  my  felf  nothing,  and  my  Soul  reach'd  after 
(7013  with  intenfe  Defire.  O  f  I  faw  what  I  owed  to  God,  in 
fuch  a  Manner,  as  I  fcarce  ever  did  :  [  knew,  (  had  never  lived 
a  Moment  to  him,  as  I  Ihould  do  :  Indeed  It  appeared  to  me,  I 
bad  never  done  any  Thing  inChrif^ianity  ;  My  Soul  longed  with 
a  vehement  Defire  to  Uvs  to  GOD. ---In  the  Evening,  fung  and 
pray'd  with  a  Number  of  Chriltians  :  Felt  thi  Powers  of  the 
fi'jrU  to  corns,  in  my  Soul,  in  Prayer,  AJterwarfe's  prayed  again 
p'ivaiely,  wi'h  a  dear  Chri(!ian  or  two,  and  found  the  Prefenee 
<>f  (loi  ;  was  fomething  humbled  in  my  fecret  Retirement  ; 
frh  my  Ingratitude,   bccaufc  I  vv23  not  wholly  fwaliowed  up  in 

rj  U  was  in  a  fvvcct  Frame  great  Part  of  the  next  Day.] 


^/.  25.      ^/ Air.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742.       ^. 

•  ^i^/^%'  f'!^''":^'  \:"  ^^'"^  *^>  ><^'^^  to  the  Ordina- 
tion oiUv.  Judd.  Dear  Mr.  BelUmy  pieach'd  from  Matth. 
XXIV.  46.  5/f^^  is  that  Servant  iffc.  I  felt  very  folemn,  and 
very  fweetly,  njoftof  the  T/me  ;  had  my^Tnoughts  much  on 
thuTime  when  6ur  Lord  will  conje-,  that  Time  refrefhed  my 
Soulmuch  ;  only  I  was  afraid,  1  fliould  not  be  found  faithful^ 
becaufe  I  have  fo  vile  a  Heart.  My  Thoughts  were  much  in 
Eternity,  where  I  love  to  dwell.  Hleffed  be  God  for  this  fo- 
Jemn  Seafon.-—  Rode  home  to  Might  with  Mr.  Bellamy  ;  felt 
fomething  fweerly  en  the  Road  ;  converfed  with  fome  PMen-Js 
'till  it  was  very  jale,  and  then  retir<;d  to  Reft  in  a  comfotiiible 
Frarae. 

Thurfday,  Septemher  2.  About  two  in  the  Afternoon,  I 
preach'd  from  John  vi.  67.  And  Godaffifted  ms  in  fome  com- 
fortable Degree  ;  but  more  efpecially  in  my  fir  ft  P/ ay  cr  ;  my 
Soul  feemed  then  to  liunch  quite  into  the  eternal  World,  and 
to  be  as  it  were  feparated  from  ihis  lower  World.-—  Afterwards 
preach'd  again  from  Ifaiah  v.  4.  God  gave  me  fome  Afiiftancci 
But  I  faw  my  felf  a  poor  Worm. 

f  On  Friday,  September  3.  He  complains  of  having  but  little 
Life  in  the  Thingsof  God,  the  former  Part  of  tin:  Day,  but  af- 
terwards Tpeaks  of  Swcetnefs  and  Enlargembcnt.  J 

Saturday,  September  /\..  Much  out  of  Health,  and  exceedingly 
deprefa'd  in  my  Soul, and  was  at  an  awful  Diftar.cefrom  God.— - 
Towards  Night,  fpcnt  fome  Time  in  profitable  Thoughts  on 
Rem.  viii.  2.-—  Near  Night,  had  a  very  fweet  Seafon  in  Prayer ; 
God  enabled  me  to  wreftle  ardently  for  the  Advancement  of  the 
Redeemer's  Kingdom  ;  pleaded  earneftly  for  my  own  dear  Bro- 
ther John^  that  Ciod  would  make  him  more  of  a  Pilgrim  and 
Stranger  on  theEarth,  and  lie  him  for  fingular  Serviceablenefs  in 
the  World  ;  and  my  Heart  fweeily  exulted  in  the  Lord,  in  the 
Thoughts  of  anyDiftrefi'es  that  might  alight  on  him  or  me, in  ihc 
Advancement  of  Chrift^s  fCingdom.  —  *Twas  a  fweet  and  com- 
fortable Hour  unto  my  Soul,  while  I  was  indulged  Freedom  to 
plead,  not  onlv  for  my  k\i^  but  for  many  other  Souls. 

Lord's-Day,  Septemher  c.  Preach'd  all  Day  :  was  fomething 
ftrengthen'd  &  aftifted  in  the  Afternoon  j  more  el^jecially  ii)  the 
Evenmg:  had  a  Senfe  of  my  unfi^eakable  Short-comings  in  all 
my  Duties.     1  found,  alas !    that  I  had  never  lived  to  Gop  «n 

ms  Life,  '  . ,     ,' 

(2  1  Uoi\^^yi 


44 


JEl  25,         ne  L  IF E  A.  D.  1742: 


Monday,  Septemh.  6.  Was  informed,  that  they  only  waited 
for  an  Opporturiity  to  apprehend  me  for  Preaching  at  Ntw-Ha^ 
ven  lately,  that  fo  they  might  impriibn  me  :  This  made  me  more 
folemn  and  ferious,  and  to  quit  all  Hopes  of  the  World's 
Ffiendfliip  :  It  brought  mc  to  a  further  Senfe  of  my  Vilenefs, 
and  juft  Defert  of  this,  and  much  more,  from  the  Hand  of  God, 
tho*  not  from  the  Hatid  of  Man  :  Retired  into  a  convenient  Place 
in  the  Woods,  and  fpread  the  Matter  before  God. 

Tuefday,  Septemb.  7.  Had  fome  Relifh  of  divine  Things  in 
the  Morning.  Afterwards  felt  more  barren  and  melancholy. 
Rode  to  Niw-Haven^to  a  Friend *s  Ho«fe  at  a  Diftance  from  the 
Town  ;  that  I  remain  undifcovered,  and  yet  have  Opportunity 
to  do  Bufmefs  privately  with  Friends,  which  come  to  Com" 
inenament* 

Wednefday,  Septemh.  8.  Felt  very  fweetly,  when  I  firft  rofc 
in  the  Morning.  In  Family-Prayer,  had  fome  Enlargement, but 
not  much  Spirituality,  *till  Eternity  came  up  before  mc  and  look'd 
near  ;  I  found  fome  Sweetnefs  in  theTboughts  of  bidding  a  dying 
Farewell  to  this  tirefbm  World  :  Tho'  fometime  ago  I  reckoned 
upon  feeing  my  dear  Friends  at  Commencement ^  yet  being  now 
denied  the  Opportunity,  for  fear  of  Imprifonment,  I  felt  totally 
refign'd,  and  as  contented  to  fpend  this  Day  alone  in  the  Woods, 
as  I  could  have  done,  if  I  had  been  allowed  to  go  to  Town.  Felt 
exceedingly  vvean*d  from  the  World  to  Day.—-  In  the  Afternoon 
difcourfed  fomething  on  fome  divineThings  with  a  dearChriftian 
Friend,  whereby  we  were  both  refrefhed.  Then  I  pray'd, 
with  a  fweet  Senfe  of  the  Bleflednefs  of  Communion  with  God  : 
I  think,  I  fcarceevcr  enjoyed  more  of  God  in  any  one  Praver, 
O  it  was  a  blell'ed  Seafon  indeed  to  my  Soul  !  I  knew  not  that 
ever  I  faw  fo  much  of  my  own  Noihingnefs  in  mv  Life  ;  never 
wondered  fo,  that  God  allowed  me  to  preach  his  Word  ;  nevex 
was  fo  aftoni(he<i  as  no'A^.--This  has  been  a  fweet  and  comforta- 
ble Day  to  my  Sou!  ;  BlefTed  be  God.—  Pray'd  again  with  my 
cear  Friend,  with  forr>ething  of  the  divine  Prefence.—  I  long  to 
he  wholly  conformed  to  God,  and  transformed  into  his  Image. 

7'hur(day,  Septemh,  9.  Spent  much  of  the  Day  alone  :  En- 
joyed the  Prefence  of  God  in  fome  comfortable  Degree  :  wa« 
vilited  by  fome  dear  Friends^  and  pray'd  with  them  :  Wrote 
fundry  f^etters  to  Friends  ;  felt  Religion  in  my  Soul  while  writ- 
ing :  Enj  jyed  fome  fweet  Meditations  on  fome  Scriptures.—-  In 
the  Eve.iing,  went  very  privately  into  Town,  from  the  Place  of 
myReriJciice  at  iheFarms,and  converfed  with  fome  dearFriends  j 
fftit  fwe«;ly  mi  fmging  Hynins  with  them  j  and  made  wy  Efca^te 


^/.  25-      «/-Wr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742.     4^ 

to  the  Farms  again,  without  being  difcovered  by  any  Enemies, 
as  I  knew  of.     Thus  the  Lord  preferves  me  continually. 

Friday,  September  10.  Longed  with  intenfe  Defire  after  God  : 
ray  whole  Soul  feem'd  impatient  to  be  Conformed  to  him,  and 
to  become  Moly^  os  he  is  Holy,—  In  the  Afternoon,  pray'd  with 
a  dear  Friend  privately,  and  had  the  Prefence  of  God  with  us  ; 
our  Souls  united  together  to  reach  after  a  blefled  Immortalitv  to 
be  unclothed  of  the  Body  of  Sin  and  Deathy  and  to  enter  the 
blefled  World,  where  no  unclean  Thing  enters.  O,  with  what 
intenfe  Defire  did  our  Souls  long  for  that  blefled  Day,  that  we 
might  be  freed  from  Sin,  and  forever  live  to  and  in  our  God  !— 
In  the  Evening,took  leave  of  thatHoufe  ;  But  firft  kneel'd  down 
and  prayed  ;  The  Lord  was  of  a  Truth  in  the  midji  of  us  ;  'twas  a 
fweet  parting  Seafon  ;  felt  in  my  felf  much  Sweetnefs  and  Affec- 
tion in  theThings  of  God.  BleflTed  be  (3od  for  every  fuch  divine 
Gale  of  his  Spirit,  to  fpeed  me  on  in  my  Way  to  the  New-Jerw 
faletn  ! —  Felt  fome  Sweetnefs  afterwards,  and  fpent  theEvening 
in  Converfation  with  Friends,  and  pray'd  with  fomc  Life,  and 
retired  to  Reft  very  late. 

[The  five  next  Days, he  appears  to  have  been  in  an  exceeding 
comfortable,  fweet  Frame  of  Mind,  for  the  moft  Part,  and 
to  have  been  the  Subjed  of  the  like  heavenly  Exercifes  as  are 
often  exprefled  in  preceeding  Paflages  of  his  Diary  ;  fuch  as  hav- 
ing his  Heart  much  engaged  for  God,  wreftling  with  God  in 
Prayer  with  Power  andArdency, enjoying  atTimes,  fweet  Calm- 
nefs  and  Compofure  of  Mind,  giving  himfelf  up  to  God  to  be  h\\ 
forever,  with  great  Complacence  of  Mind,  being  wholly  refigned 
to  theWill  of  God, that  God  might  do  with  him  what  he  pleafed, 
longing  well  to  improve  Time,  having  the  eternal  World  as  it 
were  brought  nigh,  longing  after  God  and  Holinefs,  earneftly 
dcflring  a  compleat  Conformity  to  him,  and  wondriiig  how  poor 
Souls  do  to  exift  without  God.  J 

Thurfday,  September  16.  At  Night,  felt  exceeding  fweetly  : 
Enjoyed  much  of  God  in  fecret  Prayer  :  Felt  an  uncommonRefig- 
nation  J  to  ^^and  </<?whatGod  pleafed.  SomeDays  paf},  I  (tk  great 
Perplexity  en  Account  of  my  paft  Condudt  :  My  Bitter nef>^  a«d 
Want  of  Chriftian  Kindnefs  andLove,has  been  very  dijlrejftng  to 
my  Soul :  The  Lord  forgive  me  my  unchriJiianfVarmth,?ind  wane 
®f  a  Spirit  of  Meekncfs. 


# 


[The 


46    JEt.  25.  Us   LIFE  A.  D.  1 74^. 

[  The  next  Day,  He  fpeaks  of  much  Refignation,  Calmncfs 
2.nd  Peace  of  Miod,  and  Dear  Views  of  the  eternal  Wo^-ld.  ] 

Saturday,  Septemb.  i8.  Felt  fome  Compaffion  for  Souls,  and 
mournM  I  had  no  more.  I  feel  much  more  Kindnefs,  Meek- 
i\c(sy  Gerrtlenefs  and  Love  towards  all  Mankind,  t*han  ever.  I 
long  to  be  at  theFeet  of  my  Enemies  and"  Perfecutors .  Enjoyed 
fome  Sweet ncfs,  in  feeling  my  Soul  conformed  to  C/jriti  Jefus^ 
and  given  away  to  him  forever,  in  Prayer  to  Day. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  much  Dcjc£^ion  and  Difcou- 
ragemerU,  from  an  Apprehenllon  of  his  own  Unfitnefsever  to  do 
any  Good  in  Preaching  ;  But  blefTes  God  for  all  Difpenfations  of 
Providence  andGrace ;  finding  t^at  by  all  God  wean'd  him  more 
from  the  World,  and  made  him  more  refign'd. 

The  next  ten  Days,  he  appears  to  have  been  for  the  moft  Part 
under  great  Degrees  of  Meiancholy,  exceedingly  dejeiled  and 
difcouraged  ;  fpeaks  of  his  being  ready  to  give  up  all  for  gone 
refpetSting  the  Caufe  of  Chrift,  and  exceedingly  longing  to 
di^  :  Yet  had  fome  fweet  Seafons  and  Intervals  of  Comfort,  and 
rpecial  Afliftance  and  Enlargement  in  the  Duties  of  Religion, 
and  m  performing  publick  Service?,  and  confiderable  Succefs  in 
them.  ] 

Thurfday,  September  30.  Stil!  very  low  in  Spirits,  and  did  not 
know  how  to  engage  in  any  Woik  or  Bufmefs,  efpecially  to  ccr^ 
7e£f  form  Diforders  among  Chrifliam  ;  felt  as  tho'  I  had  noPower 
«lo  be  faithful  in  that  Regard.  However  towards  Noon,  preach'd 
ixowi  Deut.  viii.  2.  And  was  enabled  with  Freedom  to  reprove 
fome  Things  in  ChrifHans  Condud:,  that  I  thought  very  unfuiia- 
ble  and  irregular  i  irii<(ied  near  two  Hours  on  this  Subjed. 

[  Through  this,  and  the  two  following  Weeks,  he  pafTed 
through  a  Variety  of  Exercifes :  He  was  frequently  deje6led,and 
felt  inward  DiftreJles  \  and  fometimes  funk  into  the  J(^epths  of 
Melancholy  :  At  which  Turns,  he  was  not  exercifed  about  the 
State  of  his  Soul,  wi^h  Regard  to  the  Favour  of  God  and  his  In- 
tcrcft  \x\  Clirirt,  b'Jt  about  his  own  finful  Infirmities,  and  unfitnefs 
for  God'?  Srrvire.  Ifis  Mind  appears  fometimes  extremely  de- 
prefb'd  and  funk  with  a  Senfe  of  inexprefiible  Vilenefs.  But  in 
ihe  mean  Time, he  fpeaks  of  many  Seafons  of  Comfort  and  fpiri- 
lual  Rerrefiimcnt, wherein  hisHeart  was  encouraged  and  ftrcngth*-^ 
p^d  in  Qodj    and  fwcrily  refignecj  to  his   VVjlIj  and  of  fome^j^ 

Seafons 


yg"/.  2  5.     " ^/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A,D.   1742.    47 

'Seafons  of  very'Mgh  Degrees  of  fpiritual  Confolation,  and  of  his 
,great  Longings  alter  Holinefs  ind  Conformity  to  God,of  hb 
'great  Fear  of  oftending  God,of  hisHeart's  being  Tweetly  melted 
•in  religiousDulifcs,ofhis  longing  for  theAdvancement  ofChrift's 
'Kingdom,  and  of  his  having  at  fome  Times  much  Affiftance  in 
Preaching,  and  of  remarkable  Effect's  on  the  Auditory.  ] 

Lords- Day,  OSiob.  17.  Had  a  confiderable  Senfeof  my  Help* 
'lefnefs  and  Inability  ;  faw  that  I  mufl  be  dependent  on  God  for 
ail  I  want ;  and  efpecially  when  I  went  to  the  Place  of  publick 
Worfhip  ;  I  found  I  could  not  fpeak  a  Word  for  God  without 
his  fpecial  Help  and  AiEflance  :  I  went  into  the  Aflem-bly  trem- 
bling, as  I  frequently  do,  under  a  Senfe  of  my  InfufHciency  to 
do  any  Thing  in  the  Caufe  of  God,  as  I  ought  to  do.-— But  it 
pleafed  God  to  afford  me  muchAffiftance,  and  there  feem'd  to  be 
a  confiderable  Effect  on  the  Hearers.—  In  the  Evening,  I  felt  3 
Difpofiiion  to  praife  God  for  his  Goodnefs  to  me,  in  fpecial, that 
he  had  enabled  me  in  foms  Meafure  to  be  faithful ;  and  my  So  j2 
rejoyced  to  think,  that  J  had  thus  performed  the  Work  of  one 
Day  more,  and  was  oneDay  nearer  my  eterna!,and  ( I  truft  )  my 
heavenly  Home.  O  that  1  might  be  faithful  to  the  Deaths  ful" 
filling  a:  an  Hirslkng  my  Day^  'till  the  Shades  of  the  Evening  of 
Life  {hall  free  my  houl  from  the  Toils  of  the  Day  !  This  Even- 
ing, in  fecret  Prayer,  I  (elt  exceeding  folcmn,  and  fuch  longing 
Defires after  Deliverance  from  Sin, and  afterConformity  toGody 
as  melted  my  Heart.  Oh,  I  longed  to  be  delivered  from  this  Body 
vf  Death  !  I  felt  inward  pleafing  Pain,  that  [  coald  not  be  con- 
formed toGod  entirely,  fully  and  forever.—  I  fcarce  ever  preach 
without  being  firft  vifsted  with  inward  ConfliiSlswnd  fore  Trials,-- 
BleiTed  be  the  Lord  for  thefe  Trials  and  Di'Ax&iXQs,  as  they  arc 
blefs'd  for  my  humbling. 

Monday,  OSfob,  18.  Fn  the  Morning,  felt  fome  Sweetnefs, 
but  ftill  prefs'd  thro'  fome  Trials  of  Soui.  My  Life  Is  a  con- 
ftant  Mixture  of  Confjlations  and  Confiids,  and  will  befo  'till 
arrive  at  the  World  of  Spirits. 

Toefday,  OSioher  19.  This  Morning  and  laft  Ni^ht,  felt  a 
fweet  Longing  in  my  Soul  after  Holinefs  :  My  Soul  feem'd  fo 
to  reach  and  ftretch  towards  the  Mark  of  perfedi  San^iiy,  that 
it  was  ready  to  break  with  Longings. 

Wcdnefday,  OSlober  20.  Exceeding  im'irm  in  Body,exerC:rcd 

ith  much  Pain,  and  very  lifelefs  in^diviae  Things. --  ¥tU  a 

tic  Syjreetnefs  m  the  Even if»g.  _.     ., 

ThurfJ.^v 


C 


4S      Mt.  25;         r*^  L  I  F  E  A»D.  1742; 

Thurfday,  OSlohtr  21.  Had  a  very  deep  Senfc  of  the  Vanity 
of  the  World,  moftof  theDay  j  had  little  more  Regard  to  it, 
than  if  I  had  been  to  go  into  Eternity  the  next  Hour.  Thro' 
divine  Goodnefs,  I  felt  very  feriOus  and  folemn.  O,  I  love  to 
Jive  on  the  Brink  of  Eternity,  in  my  Views  and  Meditations  ! 
This  gives  me  a  (weet,  awful  and  reverential  Senfe  and  Apprc- 
henfion  of  God  and  divine  Things,  when  I  fee  my  felf  as  it 
Vf^refiand'ing  before  the  yudgment^Seat  (^f  Chrift. 

Friday,  Oiioher  22.  Uncommonly  weaned  from  the  World 
to  Day  ;  My  Soul  delighted  to  be  a  Stranger  and  Pilgrim  oh 
the  Earth  :  I  felt  a  Difpofition  in  me  never  to  have  any  Thing 
to  do  with  this  World  :  The  Charafter  given  of  fome  of  the 
ancient  People  of  God,  in  Heb,  xi,  13,  was  very  pleafing  to  me, 
flhey  confejjed  that  they  werePilgrims  tff  Strangers  on  the  Earthy  by 

iheir  daily  Pra<5lice  ;  and  O  that  I  could  always  do  fo  1 

Spent  fome  confiderable  Time,  in  a  pleafant  Grove,  in  Prayer 
and  Meditation.  O  it  is  fweet,  to  be  thus  wean'd  fromFriends, 
and  from  my  felf,  and  dead  to  the  prefent  Wojld,  that  (q  I 
may  live  wholly  to  and  upon  the  blefTed  God  !  Saw  my  felf 
little,  low,  and  vile,  in  my  felf.— -In  theAfternoon,  preach'd  at 
Beihteheniy  from  D^ut.  viii.  2.  and  felt  fweetly  both  in  Prayer 
and  Preaching  :  God  helped  me  to  fpeak  to  the  Hearts  of 
dear  Chriflians.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord  for  this  Seafon  r  I  truf^, 
they  and  I  fhail  rfjoyce  on  thisAccount  to  all  Eternity.—  Dear 
Mr.  Bellamy  came  in,  while  I  was  making  the  firftPrayer  (  being 
returned  Home  from  a  Journey)  and  after  Meeting,  we  walked 
away  together,  and  fpent  the  Evening  in  fweetly  coverfmg  on 
divineThings,and  praying  together,  with  fweet  and  tender  Love 
to  each  other,  an«i  return'd  to  Reft  with  our  Hearts  in  a  ferious 
spiritual  Frame. 

Saturday,  O^ob.  23.  Something  perplexed  and  confufed. 
Rode  this  Day  from  'Bethlehem  to  Sim/bury. 

Lord's- Day, O^fZi?/'. 24.  Felt  fo  vile  and  unworthyjthat  I  fcarcc 
knew  how  to  converfe  with  human  Creatures. 

Monday,  O^ober  25.  [At  Turkey- Hills  ^'\ln  the  Evening  en- 
joyed the  divine  Prefcnce  in  fecret  Prayer  :  It  was  a  fweet  and 
comfortable  Seafon  to  me  :  A^y  Soul  longed  forGod^  for  the  living 
Cod  :  Enjoyed  a  fweet  Solemnity  of  Spirit,  and  longing  De- 
fire  after  the  Recovery  of  the  divire  Image  in  my  Soul  :  Then 
Jhall  I  befaii^fied^whm  1  Jhall cziah  in  GOD's  Likenejs^  and  ne- 
ver before. 

Tuefoay,  OSlcher  26.  [At  IVefl-Suffield,']  Underwent  the 
moll  dfcadful  Diftreffes,under  a  S^jifewl  my  gwnUflvVorlhinefs  fl 

a 


mt,  IS.     c/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1742.     ^9 

It  feem'd  to  me,  I  deferved  rather  to  be  driven  out  of  the  Place 
than  to  have  any  Body  treat  me  with  any  Kindnefe,  or  come  to 
bear  me  preach.  And  verily  my  Spirits  were  fo  dcprefs'd  at 
this  Time,  as  well  as  at  many  others,  that  it  was  impoffible  I 
fhould  treat  immortal  Souls  with  Faithfulnefs  :  I  could  not  deal 
clofely  &  faithfully  with  them,  I  felt  fo  infinitely  vile  in  myfelf. 
Oh,  what  Duft  andJ/hes  I  am,  to  think  of  preaching  theGofpel 
to  others  !  Indeed,!  never  can  be  faithful  for  oneMoment,but 
(hall  certainly  daub  with  untempered  Mortar^  if  God  don't  grant 
me  fpecial  Help.- In  theEvening,  I  went  to  the  Meeting-Houfe» 
and  it  look'd  to  me  near  as  eafy  for  one  to  rife  out  of  the  Grave 
and  preach,  as  for  me.  However,  God  afforded  me  feme  Life 
and  Power,  both  in  Prayer  and  Sermon  :  God  was  pleafed  to 
lift  me  up,  and  fhew  me  that  he  could  enable  me  to  preach. 
O  the  wonderful  Goodnefs  of  God  to  fo  vile  a  Sinner  !—  Re- 
turned to  my  Quarters  ;  and  enjoy'd  feme  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer 
alone,  and  mourn'd  that  I  could  not  live  more  to  (iod. 

Wednefday,  OSfober  27.  Speot  the  Forejioon  in  Prayer  and 
Meditation  :  Was  not  a' little  concerned  about  Preaching  in  the 
Afternoon  :  Felt  exceedingly  without  Strength^  and  very  helplefs 
indeed  :  Went  info  the  Meeting-Houfe,  afbamcd  to  fee  an/ 
come  to  hear  fucb  an  unfpeakably  worthlefs Wretch.  However, 
God  enabled  me  to  fptak  with  Gearnefs,  Power,  &  Pungency, 
But  there  was  fome  Noife  and  Tumult  in  the  Aflembiy,  that  I 
did  not  well  like,  and  endeavoured  to  bear  publick  Teftimony 
againft,  with  Moderation  and  Miidnefs,  through  the  Current  of 
my  Difcourfe.-"ln  the  Evening, was  enabled  to  be  in  fomeMea- 
fure  thankful  and  devoted  to  God. 

[The  Frames  and  Exercifes  of  hisMind,  during  the  fcur  next 
Days,  were  moftiy  very  Similar  to  thofe  of  the  two  Days  paft  ; 
excepting  Intervals  of  confiderable  Degrees  of  divine  Peace  anci 
Confolation. 

The  Things  exprefs'd  within  the  Space  of  the  three  following 
Days  are  fuch  as  thefe  ;  fome  Seafons  of  Dejection,  mourning 
for  being  fo  dcflituce  of  the  Exercifes  of  Giace,  longing  to  be 
delivered  from  Sin,  preffing  after  more  of  God,  Seafons  of  fweet 
Confolation^  precious  and  intimate  Converfe  with  God  in  fecret 
Prayer,  Sweetnefs  of  Chriftian  Converfation  &c.'--  Within  this 
Time  he  rode  from  Suffiddto  Eajibury^  Hebron^  and  Lebanon.} 

Thurfday,  Novmh.  4.  [At  Lebanon. J  Saw  much  of  my 
Nothmgnel's,  moft  of  ihisDdy  ;  bac  felt  CtfiiCerned  Ui^t  I  had  no 

H  more 


50      JEt.25.  "The   LIFE  A.D.1742. 

more  Senfe  of  my  rnfufiiciency  k  Unv^orthincfs.  O  'tis  fwect 
lying  in  theDuJi  !  But  'tis  diftrefling,to  feel  in  my  Soul  thatHell  of 
Corruption,  which  ftill  remains  in  me.— In  theAfternoon,  had  a 
Senfeof  theS\yeetnefsof  a  ftri<£t  clofe  &  ConftantDcvotcdnefs  to 
God,&  raySoul  was  comforted  with  theConfolations  of  God  ;  my 
Soul  felt  a  pleafing,  yet  painfulConcern,  left  I  (bould  fpend  fome 
Moments  without  God.  O  may  I  always  live  to  God.  —  In  the 
Evening,  was  vifited  by  fome  Friends,  and  fpcnt  the  Time  hi 
Prayer  and  fuch  Converfation  as  tended  to  our  Edification.  It 
was  a  comfortable  Seafon  to  my  Soul :  I  felt  an  intenfe  Defire 
to  fpend  every  Moment  for  God. —  God  is  unfpeakably  graci- 
ous to  me  continually  :  In  Times  paft,  he  has  given  me  inex- 
prellible  Sweetnefs  in  the  Peiforipance  of  Duty  :  Frequently  my 
Soul  has  enjoyed  much  of  God  ;  but  has  been  ready  to  fay, 
Lord^  'tis  good  to  be  here  ;  and  To  to  indulge  Sloth,  while  I  have 
lived  on  the  Sweetnefs  of  my  Feelings.  But  of  late,  God  has 
been  pleafed  to  keep  my  Soul  ^tt»^ry,aImoft  continually  ;  fo  that 
1  have  been  filPd  with  aKind  of  a  pleafingPain  :  When  I  really 
enjoy  God,  I  feel  mv  Defires  of  him  tlie  more  infatiable,  and 
ray  Thirftings  after  Holinefs  the  more  unquenchable  ;  and  the 
Lord  will  not  allow  me  to  feel  as  tho'  I  were  fully  fupplied  and 
fatisfied,  but  keeps  me  liill  reaching  forward  5  and  I  feel  barren 
and  empty,  as  tho*  I  could  not  live,  without  more  of  God  in 
me  ;  1  feel  afhamed  and  guilty  before  God.  Oh, I  fee,  theLaw 
is  /f>iritual,  but  I  am  carnal  /  I  don't,  I  can't  live  to  God. 
Oh  for  Holinefs  I  Oh  for  more  of  God  in  my  Soul !  Oh  this 
pleafing  Pain  !  It  makes  my  Soul  prefs  after  God  ;  the  Lan- 
guage of  it  is,  Then  /hail  I  be  fatisfied ^  when  1  awah  in  GOD's 
Likeneji  (Pfal.  xvii,  ult.)  but  never,  never  before  :  and  confe- 
quently  1  am  engaged  to  prefi  toward  the  Mark^  Day  by  Day. 
O  that  I  may  feel  this  continual  Hunger^  and  not  be  retarded, 
but  rather  animated  by  every  Clutter  from  Qanaan^  to  reach  for- 
ward in  the  narrow  Way,  for  the  full  Enjoyment  andPofleflion 
of  the  heavenly  Inheritaoce.  O  that  I  may  never  loiter  in  my 
heavenly  Journey. 

[  Thefe  infatiable  Defires  after  God  and  Holinefs  continued 
the  two  next  Days,  with  a  great  Senfe  of  his  own  exceeding 
Unworthinefs,  and  the  Nolhingnefs  of  the  Things  of  thi$ 
World.] 

Lord's-Day,  Novemb.  7.  [At  Alillington.]  It  feem'd  as  if 
fuch  an  unholy  Wretch  as  I  never  could  arrive  at  thatBleflcdnefs, 
to  be  holy y  as  Gfdis  holy.     At  Nooji,I  longed  for  San^ti&ation, 

and 


Mi.  25.       of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.    A.D.1742.    51 

and  Conformity  to  God.     Oh,  That  Is  the  All,  the  All  ! 
The  Lord  help  me  to  prefs  afUr  GOD  for  ever. 

Monday,  Novemb.  %.  Towards  Night,  enjoyed  muchSwect- 
nefs  in  fecret  Prayer,  fo  that  my  Soul  longed  for  an  Arrival  in 
the  heavenly  Country^  the  blcfled  Paradife  of  God.  Thro*  divine 
Goodnefs,  I  have  fcarce  feen  the  Day,  for  two  Months,  but 
Death  has  looked  fo  pleafant  to  me  at  one  Time  or  other  of  the 
Day,  that  I  could  have  rejoyced  the  prefent  {hould  be  my  lajf^ 
notwithftanding  ray  preiling  inward  Trials  and  Confli6^s :  And  I 
trufl,  the  Lord  will  finally  make  me  a  Conqueror,  and  more  than 
fo  ;  that  I  (hall  be  able  to  ufe  that  triumphant  Language,  O 
Death,  where  is  thy  Sting  !     And  0  Grave,  where  is  thyVi^ory  ! 

[Within  the  next  ten  Days,  the  following  Things  are  cx- 
prefs'd  ;  Longing  and  wreftling  to  be  holy  and  fo  live  to  God  ; 
9  Defire  that  every  fingle  Thought  might  be  for  God  ;  feeling 
guilty,  that  his  Thoughts  were  no  more  fwallowed  up  in  God  ; 
fweet  Solemnity  and  Calmnefs  of  Mind,  Submiflion  and  Refig- 
nation  to  God,  great  Weanednefs  from  the  World,  Abafement 
in  the  Duft,  Grief  at  fome  vain  Converfation  that  wasobferved, 
SweetnefsJ  from  Time  to  Time  in  fecret  Prayer  and  in  con^ 
verfing  and  praying  with  Chriftian  Friends.  And  every  Day  he 
appears  to^iave  been  greatly  engaged  in  the  great  Bufmefs  of 
Religion  and  living  to  God,  without  Interruption.] 

Friday,  Novemb.  19.  [Kt  New- Haven']  ReceivM  a  Letter 
from  the  Rev.  Mr.  Pembertonoi  New- Tor i,  d^Cinng  me  fpee- 
dily  to  go  down  thither,  and  confult  about  the  Indian  Affairs  in 
thofe  Parts,  and  to  meet  certain  Gentlemen  there,  that  were 
intruded  with  thofe  Affairs  :  My  Mind  was  inftaritly  fei^'d  with 
Concern  ;  fo  I  retired  with  two  or  threeChriftian  Friends,  and 
prayed  ;  and  iadeed  it  was  a  fweet  Time  with  me  ;  I  was  ena- 
bled to  leave  my  felf  an,d  all  my  Concerns  with  God  3  and  taking 
Leave  of  Friends,  I  rode  to  Ripton,^  znd  was  comforted  in  an 
Opportunity  to  fee  and  converfe  with  dear  Mr.  Mills. 

[  In  the  four  next  foUowingDays,  he  wasfometimes  opprefa'd 
with  the  Weight  of  that  great  Affair,  about  which  Mr.  Pem^ 
berton  had  written  to  him  ;  but  was  enabled  fromTime  toTime 
to  cajl  bis  Burden  en  the  Lord,  and  to  commit  himfelf  and  all  his 
Concerns  to  him  :  And  he  continued  flill  in  a  Senfe  of  the  Ex* 
cellency  of  Holinefs,  and  Longings  after  it,  and  earneftDefires 
Of  theAdvaneement  of  Cbrift'sKingdom  in  iheWgrld  i  and  had 


52      JEt.is-  Thelul^K  A.D.1742;. 

from  Time  to   Time    fweet  Comfort    in  Meditation    and 
Prayer.] 

Wear.efday,  Novemb,  24.  Came  to  New-Tork ;  felt  ftill 
much  concerned  about  the  Importance  of  my  Bufmefs  ;  put  up 
many  earncft  Requefts  to  God  for  his  Help  and  Dire<5tion  ;  was 
coniufed  with  the  Noife  and  Tumult  of  the  City  ;  enjoyed  but 
little  Time  alone  with  God  ;  but  my  Soul  longed  after  Him. 

Thurfday,  Novemh,  25.  Spent  much  Time  in  Prayer  and 
Supplication  :    VVas  examined  by  fome  Gentlemen,    of  my 
Chrittian  Experiences,  and   my  Acquaintance  with  Divinity, 
and  fume  other  Studies,  in  order  to  my  Improvement  in  that 
important/XfTair  of  Gofpeliizing  the  Heathen  ;  ||    Was  made 
fenfible  of  my  great  I^jnorance  and  Unfitnefs  for  publick  Ser- 
vice :  I  had  the  moft  abafing  Thoughts  of  my  felf,  I  think,  that 
ever  I  had  ;  I  thought  ray  felf  the  worft  Wretch   that  ever 
lived  :  it  hurt  me  h  pained  my  veryHeart>that  anyBody  fhould 
Jhew  me  any  Refpedt :  Alas  !  methought,   how  fadly    they  are 
deceived  in  me  ;  howmiferably  v/ould  they  be  difappointed,   if 
they  knew  my  Ipfidc  I  Oh  my  Heart  !  ---  And  in  this  deprefs'd 
Condition,  I  was   forced  to  go  and  preach  to  a  confiderable 
Afiembly,   before  fome  grave  and  learned  Minifters  ;  but  felt 
fuch  a  PrefTure  from  a  Senfe  of  my  Vilenefs,  Ignorance  &  Unfit- 
nefs to  appear  in  Publick,  that  I  was  almoft  overcome  with  it  ; 
rny  Soul  was  grieved  for  the  Congregation,  that  they  fhould  fit 
there  to  hear  fuch  a  dead  Dog  as  I  preach  ;    I  thought   my  felf 
infinitely  indebted  to  the  People,    and  loAged  that  God  would 
reward  them  with  the  Rewards  pf  bis  Grace.--  I  fpent  much  of 
the  Evening  alone. 


tl  Thefe  Gentlemen  that  eximined  Mr.  ^rahird,  were  the 
Currefpondciii-s,  i^  New-Tor  A' ^  New- Jerj'ey  zndPenvfthama^ 
ot  the  honcuralffc  Sociefy  in  Scotland  for  propagating 
Ciirillian  Knowledge  ;  to  whom  was  committed  the 
l\']2i;2i^e!r3c.;c  of  thtir  Affairs  in  thofe  Parts,  and  who 
were  now  met  at  New-Torh, 


PART 


'Mt,  25.      of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1742.     r^ 

Part     IV. 

From  the  T'ime  of  his  Examination  by  the 
Correfpondents  of  the  Society  for  propa- 
gating Chriflian  Knowledge^  and  bei?tg 
appointed  their  Miflionary,  to  his  firfl 
^Entrance  on  the  Bufinefs  of  his  Miffion 
among  the  Indians  at  Kaiinaumeek. 

FR.iday,  ISIovemh.  26.  Had  ftill  a  Scnfe  of  my  great  Vile- 
nefs,  and  endeavoured  as  much  as  I  could  to  keep  alone. 
Oh,  what  a  Nothing,  what  Duft  and  Afhes  am  I  !-  -En- 
joy'd  feme  Peace  and  Comfort  in  fpreading  my  Complaints  be- 
fore the  God  of  a]]  Grace. 

Saturday,  Novemh.  I'-j.  Committed  my  Soul  to  God  wid^ 
fome  Degree  of  Comfort  ;  "left  New-York  about  nine  in  the 
Morning  ;  came  away  with  a  dil^refling  Senfe  ftiU  of  my  un- 
fpeakable  Unworthinefs.  Surely  I  may  well  love  ail  my  Bre- 
thren ;  for  none  of  them  ail  isvfo  vile  as  I  ;  whatever  they  do 
outwardly,  yet  it  feems  to  me  nope  is  confcious  of  fo  much 
Guilt  before  God.  Oh  my  Leannefo,  my  Barrennefs,  my  Car- 
nality,and  paftBitternefs,  &VVant  of  aGofpel-Temper  !  Thefe 
Things  opprefs  my  Soul.— -Rode  fromA>fii;-3^r;^,<hirty Miles,  to 
White  Plains^  and  molf  of  the  Way  cdltinued  liftinji;  up  my 
Heart  to  God  for  iVIercy  and  purifying  Grace  ;  and  fpent  the 
Evening  much  deje<Sled  in  Spirit. 

[  The  three  next  Days,  be  continued  in  this  Frame, in  a  great 
Senfe  of  his  own  Vilenefs,  with  an  evident  Mixture  of  Melan- 
choly, in  no  fmali  Degree  ;  bu>t  had  Tome  Intervals  of  Com- 
fort and  God's  fenfible  Preience  with  him.  ] 

Wednefday,  Decemb.  i.    My   Soul  breath'd  after  God,  \a 

fweet  fpiritual  and  longing  Defires  of  Confaimity  to  him  5   my 

goul  was  brought  to  reft  it  felf  and  all  on  his  rich  Grace,  and 

°  felt 


54     ^A25'  ^*^   LIFE 

ielt  Strength  and  Encouragement  to  do  or  fufferany  Thing  that 
divine  Providence  (hould  allot  me.— Rode^  about  twenty  Miles, 
Irom  Stratpeld  to  Newtown. 

[Within  the  Space  of  the  next  nine  Days,  he  went  a  Jour- 
rey  from  Newton  to  Haddam,  his  Native  Tovi^n  ;  and  after 
flaying  there  fomeDays,  returned  again  into  thcWeftcrn  Part  of 
Conne^icut,  h  czme  toSouthbury.  In  his  Account  of  theFrames 
and  Exercifes  of  his  Mind,  during  this  Space  of  Time,  arefuch 
Things  as  thefe  ;  Frequent  Turns  of  Dejeiftion,  a  Senfe  of  his 
Vilenefs,  Emptinefs,  and  an  unfathomable  Abyfs  of  dcfperatc 
Wickednefs  in  his  Heart,  attended  with  a  Conviction  that  he 
bad  never  feen  but  little  of  it  ;  bitterly  mourning  over  his  Bar- 
rennefs,  being  greatly  grieved  that  he  could  not  live  to  God,  to 
whcm  he  owed  his  all  ten  Tbou/and  Times  ;  crying  out^  MyLeatt^ 
mfsf  my  Leannefs  !  A  Senfe  of  the  Meetnefs  and  Suitableneis 
of  his  lying  in  the  Duft  beneath  God*s  Feet,  Fervency  and  Ar- 
dour in  Prayer,  longing  to  live  to  God,  a  being  aiijifled  with 
fome  impertinent  trifling  Converfation  that  he  heard ;  but  enjoy- 
ing Sweetnefs  in  Chriftian  Converfation.] 

Saturday,Z>ff^OT^.ii.  Converfed  with  a  dear  Friend,  to  whom 
I  had  Thought  of  giving  a  liberal  Education,  and  being  at  the 
whole  Charge  of  it,that  he  might  be  fitted  for  the  Gofpel-Mini- 
ftry  *  I  acquainted  Ijim  with  my  Thoughts  in  that  Matter,  and 
folef:  him  to  confider  of  it,  'till  I  fhopld  fee  him  again.     Thea 


•  Mr.  Brainerdhzv'ing,  now  undertaken  the  Bufirefs  of  a 
Miflionary  to  the  Indians^  and  expe(?ling  in  a  little  Time  to 
leave  his  native  Country,  to  go  amon^  the  Savages,  into  the 
Wildernefs,  far  diftant,and  fpend  the  Remainder  of  his  Life 
among  ihcm,  and  having  fomeEftate  left  him  by  his  Father, 
?nd  thinking  he  fhould  have  noOccafion  for  it  among  them, 
(  tho*  afterwards, as  he  told  me,  he  found  himfelf  miftaken) 
be  fet  himfelf  to  think  which  Way  he  might  fpend  it  molt 
to  theGlory  of  God  ;  &no  Way  prefenting  to  his  Thoughts, 
wherein  he  could  do  more  Good  with  it,  than  by  being  at 
the  Charge  of  educating  fome  young  Perfon  for  the  Mini- 
firy,  that  appeared  to  be  of  good  Abilities  and  well  difpofed, 
he  pitched  upon  this  Perfon  here  fpoken  of,  to  this  End  : 
who  accordingly  was  foon  put  to  Learning  ;  and  Mr^Brai- 
»<r<i  continued  to  be  at  the  Charge  of  his  Education  from 
Year  to  Year,  fa  long  as  he  (Mr.  Brainerd)  lived,  which 
was  *tiM  this  young  Man  was  carried  through  hi»  third 
Year  in  College,  ^ 


ef  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     AD. 1 742.     55 

I  rode  to  Bethlehem,  and  fo  came  to  Mr.  Bellamy's  Lodgings  ; 
fpcnt  the  Evening  with  him  in  fweet  Converfaiion  and  Prayer : 
We  recommended  the  important  Concern  before  mentioned  (of 
fending  my  Friend  to  College)  unto  the  God  of  all  Grace. 
BlefTed  be  the  Lord  for  this  Evening's  Opportunity  together. 

LordVDay,  Decemh,  12.  I  felt,  in  the  Morning,  as  if  Ihad 
little  or  no  Power  either  to  pray  or  preach,  and  felt  a  diftrefling 
Need  of  divine  Help  :  1  went  to  Meeting  trembling :  But  it 
pleafed  God  to  aflift  me  in  Prayer  &  Sermon  :  I  think,  my  Soul 
fcarce  ever  penetrated  fo  far  into  the  immaterial  World,  in  any 
onePrayer  that  ever  I  made,nor  were  myDevotions  ever  fo  much 
refined, and  free  from  grofsConceptions,  &  Imaginations  framed 
from  beholding  material  Objeds.  I  preach'd  with  fomeSwcet- 
tiefs,from  Math.m.'^T^.But  Jeek ye firft  &c.  And  in  theAfternoon 
from  Rom.  xv.  30.  And  now  1  befeech  you^  Srethren^  &c.  There 
was  much  AfFedion  in  the  Aficmbly.  Thig  has  been  a  fweet 
Sabbath  to  me  ;  and  blefled  be  God,  I  have  Reafon  to  think» 
that  my  Religion  is  become  more  refined  and  fpiritual, by  Means 
of  my  late  inwaj-d  Confli6ls.  Amen  /  May  I  always  be  willing 
that  God  fhould  ufe  his  own  Methods  with  me. 

Monday,  Decemh.  13.  Join'd  in  Prayer  with  Mr.  Bellamy  ; 
and  found  Sweeinefs  and  Compofure  in  parting  with  him,  who 
went  a  Journey.  Enjoy 'd  fome  Sweetnefs  through  the  Dty, 
and  juft  at  Night  rode  down  to  IVoodbury. 

'i'uefday,  Decemb.  14.  Some  Perplexity  hung  on  my  Mind  : 
was  diftrefs'd,  laft  Night  and  this  Morning,  for  the  Intercft  of 
'ZtOHy  cfpecially  on  Account  of  \\\q  falfe  Appearances  of  Religion^ 
that  do  but  raiher  breed  Confufion,  efpecialiy  in  fome  Places.  I 
cried  to  God  for  Help,  to  enable  me  to  bear  Tefh'mony  againft 
thofe  Things,  which  inflead  of  promoting,  do  but  hinder  the 
Progrcfs  of  vital  Piety.  Jn  the  Afternoon,  rode  down  loSouth- 
ittry,and  converfed  again  with  my  Friend  about  the  important 
Affair  of  his  following  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry  ;  and  he  ap- 
peared much  inclined  to  devote  himfelf  to  that  Work,  if  God 
(hould  fucceed  his  Attempts  to  qualify  himfelf  for  fo  great  a 
Work.  Jn  the  Evening,  I  preach'd  from  i  The/,  iv.  8.  And 
endeavoured,  tho'  withTendernefs,  to  undermine  falfeReligion. 
The  Lord  gave  me  fome  AiTiflance  ;  but  however,  1  feemM 
fo  vile,  I  was  afhamed  to  be  feen  when  I  came  outofthcMect- 
ing-Houfe. 

Wednefday,  Decemb.  15.  Enjoyed  fomething  of  God  toDay, 
both  in  fecret  and  fecial  Prayer  ;  bat  was  feofible  of  much  Ihr- 
rcnncfs,  and  Defed  in  Duty,  as  vveii  as  my  liiability  to  hc'p  my 

kit 


^6    ^/.  15-  TJ^  LIFE 

felf  for  the  Time  to  come,  or  to  perform  the  Work  and  Bufinefs 
I  have  to  do.  Afterwards, felt  much  of  the  Sweetnefs  of  Religion ^ 
dnd  the  Tendernefs  of  the  Gofpel-Temper  :  was  far  from  Bil- 
tcrnefs,  and  found  a  dear  Love  to  all  Mankind,  and  was  afraid 
of  fcarcely  any  Thing  fo  much  as  left  fdme  Motion  of  Anger  or 
Refentment  fhould  feme  Time  or  other  creep  into  my  Heart. 
Had  feme  comforting  Soul-Refroflimg  Difcourfe  with  fome  dear 
Friends,  juft  as  vvc  took  our  Leave  of  each  other,  and  fuppofed 
it  might  be  likely  we  {hould  not  meet  again  'till  we  came  to  the 
eternal  World.  *  But  1  doubt  not, thro'  (grace,  but  that  fome  of 
us  (hall  have  a  happy  Meeting  there,  and  blefa  God  for  this  Sea- 
,f^n,  as  well  as  many  others.   Amen. 

]-  Tbur{ddiy,Dec£mb.  i6.  Rode  down  toDarby  ^  had  fome  fweet 
Thoughts,  on  the  Road  :  My  Thoughts  were  very  clear,  efpe- 
cialiy  on  theEfTence  of  our  Salvation  byChrift,from  thofeWords^ 
Thou /halt  call  hi:  Najnejefus^  he. 

•■  Friday,  Decemh.  iy.  Spent  muchTime  in  fweet  Converfation 
on  fpiritual  Things  with  dear  Mr.  Humphreys.  Rode  ioRipion  j 
fper.t  fome  Time  in  Prayer  with  dear  Chriiiian  Friends. 

Saturday, D^f^/w^.i8. Spent  muchTirae  inPrayer  in  the  Woods: 
feem'd  raifed  above  theThings  of  theWorld  :  mySoul  was  Itrong 
in  the  Lord  of  Hods  :  But  v/as  fenfible  of  great  Barrennefs. 
.  Lord^s-Ddiy^  Deccmb.  iq.  At  the  Sacrament  of  the  Lord's 
Supper,  feem'd  flrong  in  the  Lord  ;  and  the  World  with  all  its 
Frowns  &  Flatteries  in  a  great  Meafure  difappear'd,  fo  that  my 
Soul  had  nothing  to  do  with  them  ;  and  I  felt  aDifpcfition  to  be 
wholly  and  forever  the  Lord's.--  In  theEvening,  enjoyed  fome- 
tbing  of  the  divine  Prefence  ;  Had  a  humoling  Senfeofmy  Vile- 
nef?,  Barrennefs, and  Sinfuincfs.  Ob,  it  v/ounded  me, to  think  of 
the  Mifimprovement  of  Time  !  Gcd  be  merciful  to  me  a  Sinner, 
Monday,  Decemb.  20.  Spent  this  Day  in  Prayer, Reading,  and 
Writing  ;  and  enjoyed  fome  AfTifbnce,  efpecialjy  in  corre6lin-g 
fome  Thoughts  on  a  ceruin  Sul>je6l  -,  but  had  a  mournful  Senfe 
of  my  Barrennefs. 


♦  It  bad  been  determined  by  the  Commiffioners,  who  em- 
ployed Mr.  Bftiincrd  z%2,  MifTjonary,  that  he  fliould  go  aj 
fojn  as  mifZht  be  convenier.tlv,to  the  Indians  living  near  the- 
Forks  of  Delaware  River  in  Penfylvania  and  the  Indicns  on 
Sufquehanneh  River  ;  which  being  far  off,  v;here  he  would 
be  e^cpofcd  to  many  Harcffliips  arjjJ  Dangers  j  This  was 
the  Occafic;^  of  his  i?.k\r\^  Leave  ^  hia  Fii«nds  in  thi« 


c/M-.  David  Brainerd.     if\.D.  1742:    57 

'^"'m'^'w'T^'  y  p  r"'r^  ^'"^'°f  mylnfufficiency  for 
•  any  publick  Work  and  Bufinefs,  as  well  as  to  live  to  God  I 
rode  over  to  Derby,  and  preach'd  there  :  It  pleafed  God  to  give 
me  very  fweet  AlTiftance  and  Enlargement,  and  to  enable  me  to 
fpeak  with  a  foft  and  tender  Power  and  Energy.—  We  had  after- 
wards a  comfortable  Evening  in  Singing  and  Prayer  :  (god  ena- 
bled me  to  pray  with  as  much  Spirituality  and  Sweetnefs  as  I 
have  done  for  fome  Time  :  My  Mind  feem*d  to  be  uncloathed 
of  Senfe  and  Imagination,  and  was  in  a  Mcafure  let  into  the 
immaterial  World  of  Spirits.  This  Day  and  Evening  was,  I 
truft,  thro'  infinite  Goodnefs  made  very  profitable  to  a  Number 
of  us,  to  advance  our  Souls  in  Holinefs  and  Conformity  to  God  : 
The  Glory  be  to  Him  forever  :  Amtn.  How  blefled  'tis  to 
grow  more  and  more  like  God  ! 

Wednefday,  Decemb.  22.  Enjoyed  fome  AiTiftance  in  Preach- 
ing at  Ripton  i  but  my  Soul  mourned  within  me  for  my  Barren- 
ncfs. 

Thurfday,  Decemb,  23.  Enjoy'd,  I  truft,  fomething  of  God 
this  Morning  in  Secret.  Oh  how  divinely  fweet  is  it  to  come 
into  the  Secret  of  his  Prcfence,  &  abide  in  his  Pavilion  I— Took 
an  afFedionate  Leave  of  Friends,  not  expeiliing  to  fee  ThciH 
again  for  a  very  confiderable  Time,  if  ever  in  thisWorld.  Rode 
with  Mr.  Humphreys  to  his  Houfe  at  Derby  ;  fpent  the  Time  m 
fweet  Converfation  ;  my  Soul  was  rfere(h*d  and  fweetlv  melted 
with  divine  Things.  Oh  that  I  was  always  confecrared  toGod. 
Near  Night,  I  rode  to  'New-Haven^  and  there  enjoved  fome 
Sweetnefs  in  Prayer  and  Converfation,  with  fome  dear  Chriftian 
Friends  :  My  Mind  was  fweetly  ferious  and  compofed  :  Dut 
alas,  I  too  much  loft  the  Senfe  of  divine  Things  ! 

[He  continued  much  in  the  fame  Frame  of  Mind,  and  in  like 
Exercifes,  the  two  foilowingDays.] 

LordVDay,  Decemb.  lb.  Felt  much  Sweetnefs  and  Tender- 
nefs  in  Prayer,  efpccially  my  whole  Soul  feem'd  to  love  my  worft  . 
Enemies,  and  was  enabled  to  pray  for  thofc  that  are  Strangers 
and  Enemies  to  God  with  a  great  Degree  of  Softnefs  and  paih# 
tick  Fervour.  In  the  Evening, rode  from  New- Haven  to  Bran- 
ford^  after  I  had  kneel'd  down  and  pray'd  with  a  Number  of 
dear  Chriftian  Friends  in  a  very  retired  Place  in  theWcods,asii 
.fo  parted. 

Monday,  Decemb,  27.  Enjoyed  a  preciousSeafon  indeed  j  h?.d 
nfw^et  H3«Uing  Senfe  gf  divine  Things,  ©f  tbe  pure  Spirittality 

I  •£ 


58    Mt.  25.  ne  luWE 

ci  the  Religion  of  Chrift  Jefus.  In  the  Evening,  I  preachM 
from  Matth.  vi.  33.  with  much  Freedom,  and  fweet  Power  and 
Pungency  :  The  Prefence  of  God  attended  our  Meeting.  O 
the  Sweetnefs,  the  Tendcrnefs  I  felt  in  my  Soul  I  If  ever  I  felt 
the  Temper  of  Chrifl,  I  had  fome  Senfe  of  it  now.  BlefTed  be 
my  God,  I  have  feldom  enjoy'd  a  more  comfortable  and  profita- 
bJe  Day  than  this.  O  that  I  could  fpend  all j»y Time  for  God. 
Tuefd^,  Dscemb,  28.  Rode  from  Branfordto  Haddam.  In 
the  Morning,  myClearnefs  and  Sweetnefs  in  divine  Things  con- 
tinued 'y  but  afterwards  my  fpiritual  Life  fenfibly  declined. 

[The  next  twelve  Days,  he  was  for  the  moft  Part  extreamly 
dejected, difcouraged  and  diflrefTed,  and  was  evidently  very  much 
under  the  Power  of  Melancholy  5  and  there  are  from  Day  to 
Day  mofl  bitter  Complaints  of  exceeding  Vilenefs,  Ignorance, 
Corruption,  an  amazing  Load  of  Guilt,  Unworthinefs  to  cree^ 
on  God's  Earth,  everlafting  Ufslefnefe,  Fitnefs  forNothingj^V. 
and  fometimes  Expreffions  even  of  Horror  at  the  Thoughts  of 
ever  Preaching  again.  But  yet  in  this  Time  of  grcatDejedtion, 
he  fpeaksoffeveral  Intervals  of  divine  Help  and  Comfort. 

[The  three  next  Days,  which  were  fpent  at  Hebron  and  the 
Crank  (a  Parifh  in  Lebanon)  he  had  Relief,  and  enjoyed  confide- 
rable  Comfort.] 

Friday,   Jan,  14.   1742,3.    My  fpiritual  Conflids  to  Day 
were  unfpeakably   dreadful,    heavier  than  the  Mountains  and 
overflowing  Floods  :  I  feem'd  inclofed,  as  it  were,    in  Hell  it 
itAi  !     1  was  deprived  of  all  Senfe  of  God,    even   of  the   Being 
of  a  God  ;  and  that  was  my  Mifery  I   I  had  no  awfulApprehen- 
lions  of  God  as  angry.     This  was  Diftrefs,  the  neareft  a-kin  to 
the  Damned's  Torments,   that  I   ever  endured  ;    Their   Tor- 
ment, I  am  fure,   will  confift  much  in  a  Privation  of  God,  and 
confcquenily  of  all  Good.     This  taught  me  the  abfolute  Depcn-, 
dance  of  a  Creature  upon  God  the  Creator,  for  every  Crumb  of 
Happinefs  it  enjoys*     Oh  !  I  feel  that  if  there  is  no  Go^,    tho' 
I  might  live  for  ever  here,  and  enjoy  not  only  this,  but  all  other 
Worlds,  I  fhould  be  ten  Thoufand  Times  more  miferable  than 
a  I'oad  !     My  Soul  was  in  fuch  Anguifh   I  could  not  eat,   bat 
felt  as  1  fuppofed  a  poor  Wretch  would  that  isjufl  going  to  the 
Place  of  Execution.     I  v/as  almoft  fwallowed  up  with  Anguifh, 
when  I  fav/  People  gathering  together  to  hear  me  preach.  Hcw- 
cver,  1  went  in  that  Diftrefs  to  the  Houfe.  of  God,  and  found 
no:  mu«fe  Reli©{ia  t^Q  foil  Prayer ;  It  feem'd  as  if  God  would 

lee 


<?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.1743.     59 

let  loofe  thePeopIe  upon  me  to  deftroy  me,  nor  were  thcTho'ts 
of  Death  diftreffing  to  me,  like  my  own  Vilenefs.  But  after- 
wards, in  my  Difcourfe  from  Deut,  viii.  2.  God  was  pleaftd 
to  give  me  fome  Freedom  and  Enlargement,  feme  Power  and 
Spirituality  ;  and  I  fpent  the  Evening  fomething  comfoi  tably. 

[The  two  next  Days,  his  Comfort  continues,  and  he  feems 
(o  enjoy  an  almoft  continual  Sweetnefs  of  Soul  in  the  Duties 
and  Exercifes  of  Religion  and  Chriftian  Convcrfation.  On 
Monday  was  a  Return  of  the  Gloom  he  ha;i  been  under  the 
Friday  before.  He  rode  to  Covmtry  this  Day,  and  the  latter 
Part  of  the  Day  had  more  Freedom.  On  Tuefday  he  rode  to 
Canterbury^  and  continued  more  comfortable.] 

Wednefday,  Jan,  19.  [At  Canterbury.']  In  the  Afternoon 
preach'd  theLedlureat  the  Meeting-Houfe  :  Felt  fome  T'cn- 
dernefe,  and  fomething  of  the  Gofpel-Temper  :  exhorted  the 
People  to  love  one  another,  and  not  to  fet  up  their  own  Fra-mcs 
as  aStandard  to  try  all  theirBrethren  by.  But  was  much  prefs'd, 
moft  of  the  Day,  with  a  Scnfe  of  my  own  Badncfs,  inward  Im- 
purity, and  unfpeakable  Corruption.  Spent  the  Evening  in 
Joving  Chriftian  Converfation. 

Thurfday,  Jan.  20.  Rode  to  my  Brother's  Houfe  between 
Norwich  and  Lebanon  ;  and  preach'd  in  the  Evening  to  a  Num- 
ber of  People:  enjoy'd  neither  Freedom  nor  Spirituality  j  but 
Uw  my  felf  exceeding  unworthy. 

Friday,  Jan.  21.  Had  great  inward  Conflidls  ;  enjoy'd  but 
little  Comfort.  Went  to  fee  Mr.  fFilliams  of  Lebanon,  and 
fpent  feveral  Hpurs  with  him  ;  and  was  greatly  delighted  with 
his  ferious,  deliberate  and  impartial  Way  of  Difcourfe  about 
Religion. 

[The  next  Day,  he  was  much  dejecled.J 
Lord*s-Day,  Jan.  2^.  Scarce  ever  felt  my  felf  fo  unfit  t» 
cxift,  as  now  :  1  faw,  1  was  not  worthy  of  a  Place  among  thj 
Indians^  where  I  am  going,  if  God  permit :  I  thought,  1  rnould 
bs  afhamed  to  look  them  in  the  Face,  and  much  more  to  have 
any  Refpea  (hewn  me  there.  Indeed  I  felt  my  felf  banilhel 
from  the  Earth,  as  if  all  Places  were  too  good  for  fuch  aWreic.i 
as  I  :  I  thought  I  fliould  be  afliamed  to  go  among  the  very  Sava- 
ges of  Africa  ;  I  appeared  to  my  felf  a  Creature  fit  forNothmg, 
neither  Heaven  nor  Earth.— None  knows,  but  ihofc  that  feci 
it,  what  the  Soul  endures  that  is  fenfibly  fhut  out  trcm  the  Irc- 
fcnce  of  God  :  Ala?,  'tis  more  bitter  than  Death  ! 

12 


6o      JEi.  25.  r/&^  L  I  F  E 

[On  Monday,  he  rode  to  Stoningiown,  Mr.  Fijh^s  Pariflj.-— 
On  Tuefday  he  exprefies  confiderableDegrees  of  fpiritual  Com- 
fort and  Refrefhment.J 

Wednefciay,  Jan.  26.  Preach'd  to  a  pretty  largeAfTembly  at 
Mr.  Fi/h's  MeeiingHoufe  :  Infifted  on  Hunmility,  &  Stedfaftnefs 
in  keeping  God's  Commands,  and  that  thro'  Humility  we  fhould 
prefer  one  another  in  Love,  and  not  make  our  own  Frames  the 
Rule  by  which  we  judge  others.  I  felt  fweetly  calm  and,  full  of 
brotherly  Love  ;  and  never  more  free  from  Party-Spirit.  I 
hope,  fome  Good  will  follow,  that  Chriftians  will  be  freed 
from  falfe  Joy,  and  Party-Zeal,   and  cenfuring  one  another. 

[On  Thurfday,  after  confiderable  Time  fpent  in  Prayer  and 

Chriitian  Converfation,    he  rode  to  New  London  ] 

Friday,  Jan.  28.  Here  I  found  fome  fallen  into  fome  Extra- 
vagances, too  much  carried  away  with  a  falfe  Zeal  and  Bitter- 
nefs.  Oh,  the  Want  of  a  Gofpel-Temper  is  greatly  to  be  la- 
mented. Spent  theEvening  in  converfmg  with  fome  about  fome 
Points  of  Condud  in  both  Minifters  and  private  Chriftians  ;  but 
did  not  agree  with  them  ;  God  had  not  taught  them  with  Briers 
md  Iharns  to  be  of  a  kind  Difpofition  toward  Mankind. 

[On  Saturday,  he  rode  to  Eaji-Haddamy  and  fpent  the  three 
following  Days  there  ;  and  in  that  Space  of  Time  he  fpeaks  of 
his  feelingWeanednefs  from  the  World,  a  Senfe  of  the  Nearnefs 
of  Eternity,  fpecial  Affiftance  in  praying  for  the  Enlargement 
of  Chrift's  Kingdom,  Times  of  fpiritual  C«»mfort  &c.] 

"Wednefday,  Feb.  2,  Preach'd  my  Farewell-Sermon,  laft 
Night,  at  the  Houfe  of  an  aged  Man,  who  had.  been  unable  to 
attend  on  the  publick  Worfbip  for  fome  Time  ;  and  thisMorn- 
ing,  fpent  the  Time  in  Prayer,  almofi:  wherever  I  went  ;  and 
having  taken  Leave  of  Friends,!  fet  out  on  my  Journey  towards 
ihe  Indians  ;  tho*  by  the  Way  I  was  to  fpend  fome  Time  at 
Eafl' Hampton  on  Lovg-ljland^y  theLeavc  of  theCommilfioners 
v.'ho  employed  me  in  the  Indian  Affair  ;  *  and  being  accompa- 


The  Reafon  why  the  Commiffioners  or  Correfpondents 
ri'd  not  order  Mr.  Brainerd  to  go  immediately  to  the  Indi-* 
c-if,  and  f  nter  on  his  Bufinefs  as  a  MifHonary  to  them,  was 
;riat  theJf'inier  was  not  judged  to  be  a  convenient  Seafon  for 
him  firft  to  go  out  into  the  Wildcinefs,  and  enter  on  the 
DiflicuUH's  and  Hardi'hip?  hg-  rauft  there  Ik  expofed  tt>* 

nied 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.      A.D.1745.      Si 

mt^hy  zMt^QngtritomEaJi- Hampton,  we  travelled  to  L^w^, 
Gn  the  Road  I  felt  an  uncommon  PnfTure  of  Mmd  :  I  feem'd 
to  ftruggle  hard  for  fome  Pleafure  in  lomeihing  here  bel  >w,  and 
feem'd  loth  to  give  up  all  for  gone  ;  but  then  faw  my  felf  evj'dent- 
Jy  throwing  my  felf  into  all  Hardfhips  and  Diftrefl'es  in  my  pre- 
fentUndertaking  ;  I  thought  it  would  be  lefs  difficult  to  lie  down 
in  the  Grave  :  But  yet  I  chofe  to  go,  rather  than  liray.—  Came 
to  Lyme  that  Night. 

[  He  waited  the  two  next  Days  for  a  PafTage  over  theSound, 
and  fpent  much  of  the  Time  in  inward  Coiifl.ds  and  Dejedion> 
but  had  fome  Comfort. 

On  Saturday,  he  crofs'd  the  Sound,  landed  at  Oy/ier- Ponds  on 
Long-l^and^  and  travelled  from  thence  to  E  a  ft  Hampton,  And 
the  feven  following  Days  he  fpent  there,  for  the  moft  Part,under 
extream  Dejedlion  and  Gloominefs  of  Mind,  with  great  Com- 
plaints of  Darknefs,  Ignorance  he.  Yet  his  Heart  appears  to 
have  been  conftantly  engaged  in  the  great  Bufjnefs  of  Religion, 
much  concerned  for  the  Intereft  of  Religion  in  Eaji- Hampton^ 
and  praying  and  labouring  touch  for  k.  ] 

Saturday,  Feb.  12.  Enjoyed  a  httle  more  Comfort,  was  ena- 
bled to  meditate  with  fome  Compofure  of  Mind  ;  and  efpecially 
in  the  Evening,  found  my  Soul  more  refrefh'd  in  Prayer,  than 
at  any  Time  of  late  ;  my  Soul  feem'd  to  take  hold  of  God's 
Strength^  &  was  comforted  with  hisConfolaiions.  O  how  fweeC 
are  fome  Glimpfes  of  divine  Glory  !  How  ftrengthening  and 
quickening. 

LordVDay,  Feb.  13.  At  Noon,  under  a  great  Degree  of 
Difcouragement ;  knew  not  how  it  was  poffiblc  for  me  to  preach 
in  the  Afternoon,  was  ready  to  give  up  all  for  gone  ;  but  God 
was  pleafed  to  affift  me  in  fome  Meafure.  In  the  Evening,  my 
Heart  was  fweetly  drawn  out  after  God,  and  devoted  to  him. 

[  The  next  Day,he  had  Comfort andDejedion intermingled.] 

Tuefday,  Feb.  15.  Early  in  the  Day  I  felt  fome  Comfort, 
afterwards  1  walked  into  a  neighbouring  Grove,  and  felt  more 
as  a  Stranger  on  Earth,  I  think,  than  ever  before  ;  Dead  to  any 
of  the  Enjoyments  of  the  World  as  if  I  had  been  dead  in  a  na- 
tural Senfe.— In  the  Evening,  had  divine  Sweetnefs  in  fccret 
Duty  :  God  was  the^i  my  Portion, and  my  Soul  rofe  above  thofe 
deep  Waters,  into  which  I  have  funk  (o  low  of  late  ;--  My  Soul 
then  cried  for  Zioji,  and  had  Sweetnefs  in  fj  doing. 

[Thi« 


62     JEf.  25,  7/^i?LIFE 

[  This  fweet  Frame  continued  the  next  Morning  ;  but  after- 
wards his  inward  Diftrefs  returned.] 

Thurfday,  F^b.  17.  In  the  Morning,  found  my  felf  foinething 
comfortable,  and  reftcd  on  God  in  fome  Meafure.—  Preach'd 
ihisDay  at  a  little  Village  belonging  xoEa/i- Hampton  ;  and  God 
was  pleafed  to  give  me  his  gracious  Prefence  and  AfTiftance,  fo 
that  I  fpake  with  Freedom,  Boldnefs  and  fome  Power.  In  the 
Evening,  fpent  fome  Time  with  a  dear  Chriftian  Friend  ;  felt 
fweetly  ferious,  as  on  the  Brink  of  Eternity  ;  my  Soul  enjoyed 
Sweetnefs  in  lively  Apprehenfions  of  {landing  before  the  glorious 
God  :  prayed  with  my  dear  Friend  withSweetnefsjSnd  difcourfed 
with  utmoft  Solemnity.  And  truly  it  was  a  little  Emblem 
of  Heaven  it  felf.---  I  find  my  Soul  is  more  refined  and  weaned 
from  a  Dependance  on  my  Frames  and  fpiritual  Feelings. 

Friday,  Feb,  18.  Felt  fomcthing  fweetly  moft  of  the  Day, 
and  found  accefs  to  the  Throne  of  Grace.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord 
for  any  Intervals  of  heavenly  Delight  and  Compofure,  while  I 
am  engaged  in  the  Field  of  Battle.  O  that  I  might  be  ferious, 
folemn  and  always  vigilant,  while  in  an  evil  World.  Had  fome 
Opportunity  alone  to  Day,  and  found  fome  Freedom  in  Study. 
O,  I  long  to  live  to  God. 

Saturday,  Feb.  19.  Was  exceeding  infirm  to  Day,  greatly 
troubled  with  Pain  in  my  Head  and  Dizzinefs,  fcarce  able  to 
fit  up.  Hov/ever,  enjoyed  fomething  of  God  in  Prayer,  and  per- 
formed fome  necefTary  Studies.  I  exceedingly  long  to  die,  and 
yet  through  divine  Goodncfs  have  felt  very  willing  to  live,  for 
two  or  three  Days  paft. 

LordVDay,  Feb.  20.  Was  fomething  perplexed  on  Account 
of  my  Carelefnefs  ;  I  thought  1  could  not  be  fuitably  concerned 
about  the  important  VV^ork  of  the  Day,  and  fo  was  reftlefs  with 
my  Eafinefs.-- Was  exceeding  infirm  again  to  Day;  but  the 
Lord  ftrengthened  me,  both  in  the  outward  and  inward  Man,  fo 
that  I  preach'd  with  fome  Life  and  Spirituality,  cfpccially  in  the 
Afternoon,  wherein  1  was  enabled  to  fpeak  clofely  againlt  fe!§fh 
Religion,  that  loves  Chrift  for  his  Benefits,  but  not  for  himfelf. 

[  Durlnrr  the  next  Fortnight,  it  appears  that  he  for  the  moft 
Part  enjoyed  much  fpiritual  Peace  and  Comfort.  In  his  Diary 
for  this  Space  of  Time,  are  exprefl'ed  fuch  Things  as  thefe  ; 
Mourning  over  indwellingSin  andUnprofitablenefs  ;  Deadnefs  to 
the  Worlfl,  Longing  afier  God  and  10  live  to  his  Glory,  Heart- 
mclling  Dcfircs  after  his  eternal  Flom^,  fix'd  RcUapce  on  God 

(gx 


(?/ Mr.  David  Brainefd,       A.D.1743;     5* 

for  his  Help,  Experience  of  much  divine  AiTiftance  both  in  the 
private  and  publick  Exercifesof  Religion  ;  jnward  Strength  and 
Courage  in  theService  of  God,  very  frequent  Refrefhment, Con- 
folation  and  divine  Svi^eetnefs  in  Meditation,  Prayer,  Preaching 
and  Chriftian  Converfation.  And  it  appears  by  his  Account 
that  this  Space  of  Time  was  filled  up  u'ith  great  Diligence  and 
Earncftnefs  in  ferving  God, in  Study, Prayer,Meditation,Pfeach- 
ing,  and  private  Inftru6ling  and  Counfelling.  ] 

Monday,  Anarch  7.  This  Morning  when  I  arofe,  I  found  my 
Heart  go  forth  afterGod  in  longingDefires  ofConformity  tohim, 
and  in  fecret  Prayer  found  my  felf  fweetly  quicken'd  and  drawn 
out  in  Praifes  to  God  for  all  he  had  done  to  and  for  me,  and  for 
all  my  inward  Trials  and  Diftrefles  of  late  ;  my  Heart  'afcribed 
Glory,  Glory,  Glory  to  the  blefled  God  I  And  bid  Welcome 
all  inward  Diftrefs  again,  if  God  faw  meet  to  exercife  me  with 
it ;  Time  appeared  but  an  Inch  long,  and  Eternity  at  Hand  ; 
and  I  thought  I  could  with  Patience  and  Chearfulnefs  bear  any 
Thing  for  the  Caufe  of  God  :— For  I  faw  that  a  Moment  would 
bring  me  to  a  World  of  Peace  and  Ble/Tednefs  -,  and  my  Soul,  bv 
the  Strength  of  the  Lord,  rofe  far  above  this  lower  World,  and 
all  the  vain  Amufements  ana  frightful  Difappointmcnts  of  it. 
Afterwards,  was  vifited  by  fome  Friends,  but  loft  fome  Sweet- 
nefs  by  the  Means.  After  that,  had  fome  Tvi^eet  Meditation  on 
Gen.  v.  24.  Jni  Enoch  walked  with  God  &c.  ---  This  was  a 
comfortable  Day  to  my  Soul. 

[The  next  Day,  he  feems  to  have  continued  in  a  confidera- 
ble  Degree  of  Sweetnefs  and  Fervency  in  Religion.] 

Wednefday, -^^riT-^g.  Endeavoured  t©  commit  my  felf  and 
all  my  Concerns  to  God.  Rode  16  Miles  to  Mantauk.  *  and 
had  fome  inward  Sweetnefs  on  the  Road  ;  but  fomerhing  of 
Flatnefs  Sc  Deadnefs  after  I  came  there  and  had  feen  the  Indians  : 
I  withdrew,  and  endeavoured  to  pray,  but  found  mv  felf 
awfully  deferted  and  kft^  and  had  an  aiHiding  Senfe  of  my 
Vilenefs  and  Meannefs.  However,  1  went  and  preach'd  from 
Jfai.  liii.  10.  Had  fome  Affiftance  ;  and,  I  truft,  fomethipi; 
©f  the  divine  Prefence  was  among  us.  In  the  Evening,  again  ( 
pray'd  and  exhorted  amoag  them,  after  having  had  a  Scafon 
alone,  wherein  I  was  lo  prefs'd  with  the  Blacknefs  of  my  Na- 
ture, that  I  thought  it  was  not  fit  for  me  to  fpeak  io  much  as  to 
Indians. 


*  Alantauk  is  the  Eaftcrn  Cape  or  End  of  Long- JJland ,  hyhz- 
hltad  QhkAy  by  Indians*  [The 


€4    ^t,  25.  The  LIFE 

[The  next  Day,  he  returned  to  Eaft- Hampton  ;  was  exceed- 
ing infirm  in  Bodv  through  the  remaining  Part  of  this  Week  ; 
but  fpe  ks  of  AiTiftance  and  Enlargement  in  Study  and  religious 
ExercifcSj  and  of  inward  Sweetnefs  and  breathing  after  God.} 

Lord's-Day,  March  13.  At  Noon,  I  thought  it  impoffible 
for  me  to  preach,  b\  Reafun  of  bodily  Weaknefs  and  inward 
Deadnefs  ;  and  in  the  firft  Prayer,  was  fo  weak  that  I  could 
hardly  ftand  ;  but  in  i>ermon,  God  ftrenthgned  me,  fo  that  I 
fpake  near  an  Hour  and  half  with  fweet  Freedom, Clearnefs, and 
fome  tender  Power,  from  Gen.  v.  24.  ^«^  Enoch  walked  with 
Cod.  I  was  fweetly  aflifled  to  infift  on  a  clofe  Walk  with  God^ 
and  to  leave  This  as  mv  parting  Advice  to  Clod's  People  here, 
that  they  Jhsuld  walk  with  God,  May  the  God  of  all  Grace 
fucceed  my  poor  Labours  in  this  Place  ! 

Monday,  March  14.  In  the  Morning,  was  very  bufy  in  Pre- 
paration for  myjourney,  and  was  almoft  continually  engaged  in 
cjaculatory  Prayer.  About  ten,  took  Leave  of  the  dear  People 
of  Ea/i-  Hampton.  M)Heaft  grieved  &  mourned,  and  rejoyced 
at  thefameTime,  rode  near  fifty  Miles  to  aPart  of  Brook-Haven^ 
and  lodged  therejand  had  refrefhingConverfation  with  aChriltian 
Friend. 

[In  two  Days  more  he  reached  New-York  \  but  complains  of 
iriAJch  Defertit^n  and  Deadnefs  on  the  Road.  He  ftay'd  one 
Day  in  New-York^  and  on  Friday  went  to  Mr.  Dickinfon's  at 
Elifabeth-Town  His  Complaints  are  the  fame  as  on  the  two 
preceeding  Days.] 

Saturday,  March  19.  Was  bitterly  diftrefTed  under  a  Senfe 
ef  my  Ignorance,  Darknefs  and  Unwonhinefs ;  got  alone,  and 
poured  out  my  Complaint  to  God  in  the  Bitternefs  of  mySoul.— 
In  the  Afternoon,  rode  to  Newark^  and  had  fome  Sweetnefs  m 
Converfation  with  Mr.  Burr^  and  in  Praying  together.  O  ! 
'blefled  be  God  forever  and  ever,  for  any  enlivening  and  quick- 
ening. 

Lords-Day,  Anarch  so.  Preach'd  in  the  Forenoon  :  God 
gave  me  fome  Afiiftance  ar.dSwectnefs,  and  enabled  me  tofpeak 
with  real  Tendernefs,  Love  and  Impartiality.  In  the  Evening, 
preach'd  again  ;  and  of  a  Truth  God  was  pleafed  to  afTitt  a  poor 
Worm.  Bleffed  be  God,  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  Life, 
Power,and  paflionate  Defire  of  the  Edification  of  God*s  People, 
and  with  fome  Power  to  Sinners.  In  the  Evening,  I  felt  fome- 
thing  fpiritual  and  watchful, left  my  Heart  fliould  by  any  Means 
be  drawn  away  from  God,     Ob,  when  fhall  I  ccwie  to  tliat 


'e?/  Mr.  David  Braincsd.         17^^.3.      5^ 

WcfTcd  Wnrld,  whprp  every  Pow.rof  my  Eoul  will  be  inccfTantlv 
and  eternally  wound  up,  in  heavenly  Employment  and  Enjov. 
ments,  to  the  higheft  Degree.  ■'  ^ 

t  On  Monday  he  went  to  H^obdbridgiy  where  he  fpeaks  of  his 
being  with  a  Number  of  Miniflers  j  *  and  the  Day  following 
of  his  travelling  part  of  the  Way  towards  iVm;-rtfri^,and  lodging 
at  a  Tavern  :  On  Wednefday,  he  came  to  New-Tor k  :  Oa 
Thurfday,  he  rode  near  50  Miles,  from  Nnu-Terk  to  Nenb* 
CoftU  :  On  Friday,  went  to  Danbury  :  On  Saturday,  to  Nno* 
Mlford:  On  the  Sabbath,  fee  rode  5  or  6  Miles  to  ^  Place  near 
Kent  in  Conne^icut^  called  Scatuoke,  where  dwell  a  Number  of 
Indians^  ||  and  preached  to  them  :  On  Monday,  being  detain*d 
by  the  Rain,  he  tarried  at  Kent :  On  Tuefday,  he  rode  from 
Kent  to  Salfkury  3  Wednefday,  he  went  to  Sheffield  :  Thurfday, 
Anarch  31.  he  went  to  Mr.  Sergeant's  at  Stockbridge.  He  was 
dejected  and  very  difconfolate,  thro'  the  main  of  this  Journey 
from  NeW'Jerfey  to  Stockbridge  ;  and  efpecially  on  the  laftDay 
his  Mind  was  overwhelmed  with  an  exceeding  Gloominefs  and 
Melancholy] 


*  Thefe  Minifters  were  the  Correfpendenti^  who  now  met  at 
Woodbridge^  and  gave  Mr.  Brainerd  new  Diredlions,  mi 
inftead  of  fending  him  te  thelndians  at  XhtFcrki  of  Delaware^ 
as  before  intended  ;  they  ordered  him  to  go  to  a  Number 
of  Indians,  at  Kaunaumeek^  a  Place  in  the  Province  of  New 
Torky  in  the  Woods  between  Siocibridge  and  J/bany.  This 
Alteration  was  cccafioned  by  twoThings,  viz.  1.  Informa- 
tion that  the  Correfpondents  had  received,  of  fome  Conten- 
tion now  fubfifling  between  the  white  People  and  the  Indi- 
aBS  atZ)^/tfWflr^, concerning  their  Lands,  which  they  fuppo- 
fed  would  be  a  Hindrance  at  prefent  to  their  Entertainment 
©f  a  Miffionary,  and  to  his  Succefs  among  them.  And  2*.^ 
Some  Intimations  they  had  received  from  Mr  Sergeant^ 
Mi/Tionary  to  the  Indians  at  Stvdbridge,  concerning  the  In- 
dians at  Kaunaumeeky  and  the  hopeful  Profpedt  of  Succefs 
that  a  Miffionary  might  have  among  them. 

(  Thefe  were  the  fame  Indiam  that  Mr.  Brainerd  ment-ow 
in  his  Diary,  on  Aug,  I2.  the  preceeding  Year. 

K  PART 


66    ^/•..25.  r/;^LIFE 


•?i 


Part     V. 

From  his  Jirfi   Beginning  to  infiruSi   the. 
Indians  at  Kaunaumeek,  to  his  Ordina- 
tion. 

I"lRIday,  April  i,  1 743.  I  xo^Q  io  Kaunaumeek ^  ntTiX  ivttniy 
^*  A/liles  from  Stcckbridge^  where  the  Indians  YivQ^Vfiih.  whom 
"  .   I  am  concerned, and  there  lodgM  on  a  littleHeap  of  Straw  : 
was  greatly  exercifed  with  inward  Trials  and  Diftrefles  all  Day  5 
and  in  the  Evening,  my  Heart  was  funk,   and  I  feemed  to  have 
ri.o  God  to  go  to.     O  that  God  would  help  me  ! 

[The  next  five  Days,  he  was  for  the  moft  Part  in  a  dejedted 
depreb'd  State  of  Mind,  and  fometimes  extreamly  fo.    Hefpeaks 

of  God's  JVaves  and  Bilkws  rolling  over  his  Soul ;  and  of  his 
being  ready  fometimes  to  fay,  Surely  his  Mercy  is  clean  gone  for 
ever^  and  he  will  he  favourable  no  more  ;  and  fays,  The  Anguiih 
he  erKlured,  was  namclefs  and  inconceivable  :  But  at  the  fame 
Time  fpeaks  thus  concerning  his  DiflrefTes,  IVhat  God  deftgnshj 
all  my  Dijlrejfes  I  know  not  5  but  this  I  know,  1  deferve  'them  all^ 
end  ThoufaKds  more."-  He  givss  an  Account  of  the  Indians  kindly 
receiving  him,  and  being  ferioufly  attentive  to  hislnftrudions.j 

Friday,  Jpril'j.  Appeared  to  my  felf  exceeding  ignorant, 
weak,  helplefs,  and  unworthy,  and  altogether  unequal  to  my 
Work.  It  feem*d  to  me,  I  fhould  never  do  any  Service,  or 
i#!iave  any  Succefs  among  the  Indians,  My  Soul  was  weary  of 
my  Life  :  I  longed  for  Death,  beyond  Meafure.  When  I 
thought  of  any  godly  Soul  departed,  my  Soul  was  ready  to  envy 
Jhim  his  Privilege^  'thinking,  Oh^  when  will  my  7urn  come  / 
Muji  it  be  Tears  firfl  /--  But  I  know,  thofe  ardent  Defires, ,  at 
this  and  other  Times,  rofe  partly  for  Want  of  Relignation'  to 
C^od  under  allMifcries ;  and  fo  were  but  Impatience.  Towards 
Night,  1  had  ([  think)  the  Exercife  of  Faith  m  Pfayer,and  fom« 
Aitft3!ice  ia  Wriiing*    Q  thai  God  woti'ld  keep  me  nearhim  f 

Fiida^^ 


ej  Mr.  David  Braincrd.      A  D.  1 7  43.     67 

Friday,  Jpril  8.     Was  exceedingly  prefs'd  under  a  Senfe  of 
TAy  Pride ^S elf fiinefs,  Bittermfs^  and  Party-Spirit,  inTimes  p;ift, 
while  I  attempted  to  promote  the  Caufe  of  God  :    It's  vile  Na- 
ture and  dreadful  Confequences  appeared  in  fuch  oJious  Coloars 
to,  me,  that  ray  very  Heart  was  pained  :    I  faw  how  poor  Souls 
ftumbled  over  it  into  everlafling  Def^rudlion,   that  1 'was  coif" 
ftrained  to  make  that  Prayer  in  the  Bitternefs  of  my  Soul,  O 
Lord,  deliver  me  from  Blood-Guiltinefs.     I  faw  my  Dcfert  of  Hell 
on  this  Account.      My  Soul  was  full  of  inward  Anguifli  and 
Shame  before  God,  that  I  had  fpcnt  fo  much  Tiir.e  in  Converfa- 
tion  tending  only  to  promote  a  Party-Spirit.     Oh,  I  faw  I  ha^ 
not  faitably  prized  Mortification,  Self-denial,  Refign^tionundtrr 
all  Adverfities,    Mecknefs,  Love,    Candour,    and  Holinefs  of 
Heart  and  Life  :  And  this  Day  was  alraoft  whally  fpent  in  fuch 
bitter  and  Soul-afflicting  Refle(£lions  on  my  paft   Frames  and 
Condud.— Of  late,I  have  thought  much  of  having  the  Kingdom 
of  Chrift  advanced  in  the  World  ;  But  now  I  faw  I  had  enough 
to  do  within  my  felf.     The  Lord  be  merciful  to  me  a  Sinner, 
and  wafh  my  Soul. 

Saturday,  j^pril  9.  Remained  much  in  the  ^jme  State  as 
Yefterday  ;  excepting  that  the  Senfe  of  my  Vilenefs  was  not  fo 
quick   and  acute. 

Lord's-Day,  j^pril  10.  Rofe  early  in  the  Morning,  and 
walked  out,  and  fpent  confiderable  Time  in  the  Woods,  in 
Prayer  and  Meditation.  Preach'd  to  the  Indiom ,hoi\\  Forenoon 
andAfternoon.  They  behaved  foberly  in  general :  two  or  threfs 
in  particular  appeared  under  fome  religious  Concern  j  with 
whom  I  difcourfed  privately  ;  and  one  told  me,  ker  Heart  hnd 
cried ,  ever  fine  e  Jhe  heard  me  preach  fir  ft, 

[The  next  Day,   he  complains  of   much  Defer t ion  ] 

Tuefday,  Jpril  12.  Was  greatly  opprefs'd  with  Grief  at^4 
Shame,  refleding  on  my  paft  Condua,  my  BiiterneU  &  Pt^r.^M 
Zeal :  I  was  afhamed,to  think  that  fuch  a  Wretch  a^  I  had  evff 
preach'd  !  —  Longed  to  be  excufed  from  that  Work.  A\v\ 
when  my  Soul  was  not  in  Anguifh  and  keen  Diftrefs,  I  \t\z 
Senfelefs  a^a  Beafi  before  G;i,  and  felt  a  PCind  of  guikyAmufe- 
ment  with  the  leaft  Trifles  ;  which  ftiil  maintainM  a  Kinder 
ftifle-d  Horror  of  Confcience,  fo  that  I  could  not  red  any  mor? 
than  a  condemned  MalefafSlor. 

i^Wednefday,  Jpril  i^^  My  Heart  was  overwhelmed  Wiihm 
1^1 :  I  verily  thought  I  was  the  mean?(t,  vileft,  mpft  l.clplers. 


68      JEi.25*  The  LIFE 

guilty,  ignorant,  benightned  Creature  living.  And  yet  I  knew 
what  God  had  done  for  my  Soul, at  thefameTime  :  The'  fome<- 
times  I  was  aflaulted  with  damping  Doubts  and  Fears,  whether 
it  was  poflible  for  fuch  a  Wretch  as  I  to  be  in  a  State  of  Giace. 

Thurfday,  Jpril  14.  Remained  much  in  the  fame  State  as 
Yefterday, 

Friday,  Jpril  15.  In  the  Forenoon,  very  difconfolatc.  In 
the  Afternoon,  preach'd  to  my  People,  and  was  a  little  encou- 
raged in  (ome  Hopes  God  might  beftow  Mercy  on  their  Souls.— 
Felt  fomething  refigned  to  God  under  all  Difpenfations  of  his 
Providence. 

Saturday,  Jpril  16.  Still  in  the  Depths  of  Diflrefs. —  In  the 
Afternoon,  preach'd  to  my  People ;  but  was  more  difcouraged 
with  them  than  before  ;  fear'd  that  nothing  would  ever  be  done 
for  them  to  any  happyEffecS.  I  retired  and  poured  out  my  Soul 
to  God  for  Mercy  ;  but  without  any  fenfible  Relief.  Soon 
after,  came  an  Irifh-man  and  a  Dutch-many  with  a  Deflgn,  as 
they  faid,  to  hear  me  preach  the  next  Day  ;  but  none  can  tell 
how  I  felt,  to  hear  their  profane  Talk.  Oh,  I  longed  that 
!fome  dear  Chriftian  knew  my  Diftrefs.  I  got  into  a  Kind  of 
Hovel,  and  there  groan'd  out  myComplaini  to  God  ;  and  withal 
felt  more  fenfible  Gratitude  and  Thankfulnefs  to  God,  that  he 
had  made  me  to  differ  from  thefe  Men,  as  I  knew  thro'  Grace 
he  had. 

LordVDay,  Jpril  17.  In  the  Morning  was  again  diftrcfTed 
as  foon  as  I  waked,  hearing  much  Talk  about  the  World  and 
the  Things  of  it  :  Tbo*  I  perceived  the  Men  were  in  fome 
Meafure  afraid  of  me  ;  and  I  difcourfed  fomething  about  fandli- 
fying  the  Sabbath,  if  poflible,  to  folemnize  their  Minds  :  But 
when  they  were  at  a  littIeDiftance,they  again  talked  freely  about 
fecular  Affairs.  Oh,  I  thought  wh^t  a  Hell  it  would  be,  to 
live  with  fuch  Men  to  Eternity  !  The  Lord  gave  me  fomeAflift- 
ance  in  Preaching,  all  Day,  aad  fome  Refignation,  and  a  fmall 
I)egrce  of  Comfort  in  Prayer  at  Night. 

[  He  continued  in  this  difconfolate  Frame  the  next  Day.] 

Ttjcfday,  Jpril  iq.  In  the  Morning,  enjoyed  fome  fweeC 
Rcpofe  and  Reft  in  God  ;  felt  fome  Strength  and  Coniidengc  in 
God  ;  and  my  Soul  was  in  fome  Meafure  refrcfh'd  and  com" 
forted.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Writing,  and  had  fome  Ex^ 
ercife  of  Grace  fenfible  and  i:omfortable  ;  my  Soul  fecm*d  lifjM 
;kbove  the  dtepff^av^.^nh^xm  it  has  bc^n  fo lopg  aJmoft  drow^^i' 

felt 


JEl.iS.         of  Mr.  David  Bralncrd.     A.D.  1 743.     69 

felt  fome  fpiritual  Longings  and  Breathings  of  Soul  after  God  ; 
found  my  felf  engaged  for  the  Advancement  of  Chrift*s  Kingl 
tlom  in  my  own  Soul,  more  than  in  others,  more  than  in  the 
Heathen  World. 

Wedncfday,  Jpril  20.  Set  apart  this  Day  for  Fafting  and 
Prayer,  to  bow  my  Soul  before  God  for  the  Beftowment  of  di- 
vine Grace  ;  efpecially  that  all  my  fpiritual  AfHi6tiorK  and  in- 
ward Diftrefles  might  be  fan6lificd  to  my  Soul.  And  endea- 
voured alfo  to  remember  the-Geodnefs  of  God  to  me  in  the  Year 
paft,  this  Day  being  my  Birth-Day.  Havmg  obtained  Help  of 
God,  I  have  hitherto  lived,  and  am  now  arrived  at  the  Age  of 
25  Years.  My  Soul  was  pained,  to  think  of  my  Barrennefs 
and  Deadnefs  ;  that  I  have  lived  fo  little  to  the  Glory  of  the 
eternal  God.  I  fpent  the  Day  in  the  Woods  alone,  and  there 
poured  out  my  Complaint  to  God.  O  that  God  would  enable 
me  to  live  to  his  Glory  for  the  future. 

Thurfday,  Jpril  21.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in  Reading  and 
Prayer,  and  found  my  felf  fomething  engaged  ;  but  ftill  mucf» 
deprefs'd  in  Spirit  under  a  Senfe  of  my  Vilenefs  and  Uiifitnefs 
for  any  publick  Service.  In  the  Afternoon,  I  vifited  my  Peo- 
ple, and  prayed  and  converfed  with  fome  about  their  SoulsCon- 
cerns:  and  afterwards  found  fome  Ardour  of  Soul  in  fecret 
Prayer.     O  that  I  might  grow  up  into  the  Likenefs  of  God. 

Friday,  yfpril  22.  Spent  the  Day  in  Study,  Reading  and 
Prayer  ;  and  felt  a  little  relieved  of  my  Burden,  that  has  been 
fo  heavy  of  late.  But  ftill  in  fome  Meafure  opprefs'd  :  had  a 
Senfe  of  Barrennefs.  Oh,  my  Leannefs  teftifies  againft  me  !  My 
very  Soul  abhors  it  felf  for  it*s  Unlikenefs  to  God,  it's  Inactivity 
and  Sluggiftinefs.  When  I  have  done  all,  alas,  what  an  un- 
profitable Servant  am  I  !  My  Soul  groans,  to  fee  the  Hours  of 
the  Day  roll  away,  becaufe  I  don't  fill  them,  in  Spirituality 
and  Heavenly-Mindednefs,  And  yet  I  long  they  fhould  fpecd 
their  Pace,  to  haften  me  to  my  eternal  Home,  where  I  may  fill 
up  all  my  Moments,  thro*  Eternity,  for  God  and  his  Glory. 

[On  Saturday  and  Lord  VDay,  his  Melancholy  again  pre- 
vailed :  He  cried  out  of  his  Ignorance,  Stupidity,  and  Senfe^' 
Icfnefs ;  while  yet  he  feems  to  have  fpent  the  Time  with  ut^ 
moft  Diligence,  in  Study,  in  Prayer,  and  in  Inftruftirtg  and 
Coqnfelling  the  Indians,  On  Monday,  he  funk  into  thedeepcft 
Melancholy  5  fo  that  he  fuppofed  he  never  fpent  a  Day  in  fuch 
refs  in  his  Life  ;  not  in  Fears  of  Hell,  (which,  be  fays,  he 
viQ  prciljng  Fear  of )  but  a  diftrcffing  Senfe  of  his  own  Vilc- 

ntfc 


J 


"O 


^/.  26.  "ih  LIFE 


rcfs  &c.  On  Tuefday,  he  exprefles  fome  Relief.  Wcdnefday 
he  kept  as  a  Day  of  Fafting  and  Prayer,  but  in  great  Diftrefs. 
The  three  Days  next  following,  his  Melancholy  continued,  but 
in  a  lefTer  Degree,  and  with  Intervals  of  Comfoit.  *  ] 

Lord's- Day,  May  i.  Was  at  Stockbridge  to  Day.  In  the 
Forenoon  had  fome  Relief  and  Ailiftance  ;  tho'  not  fo  much  as 
ufual.  In  the  Afternoon,  felt  poorly  in  Body  and  Soul  5  while 
I  was  preaching,  feemed  to  be  rehearfing  idle  Tales^  without 
the  leaft  Life,  Fervour,  Senfe,  or  Comfort  :  and  efpecially 
afterwards,  at  the  Sacrament,Fny  Soul  was  filled  withConfufion, 
and  the  utmofl  Anguifh  that  ever  I  endured,  under  the  Feeling 
of  my  inexpreiTible  Vilenefe  and  Meannefs  :  It  was  a  moft  bitter 
and  diftrefling  Seafon  to  me,  by  Reafon  of  the  View  I  had  of  my 
own  Heart,  and  the  fecret Abominations  that  lurk  there :  I  tho*t 
the  Eyes  of  all  in  the  Houfe  were  upon  me,  and  I  dared  not  look 
any  One  in  the  Face  ;  for  it  verily  feem'd  as  if  they  faw  the  Vile- 
nefs  of  my  Heart,  and  all  the  Sins  I  had  ever  been  guilty  of. 
And  if  I  had  been^baniflied  from  the  Prefence  of  all  Mankind, 
never  to  be  feen  any  more,  or  fo  much  as  th9Ught  of,  ftill  I 
fhould  have  been  diltrcfTed  with  Shame  ;  and  I  (hould  have  been 
afhamed  to  fe^^the  moft  barbarous  People  on  Earth,  becaufe  I 
was  viler,  and  feemingly  more  brutifhly  ignorant  than  they.  — - 
1  am  made  to  pojfefs  the  Sins  of  my  Touth, 

[  The  remaining  Days  of  this  Week  were  fpent,  for  the  moft 
Part,  in  inward  Diftrefs  andGloominefs.  The  next  Sabbath,  he 
had  Encouragement,  Ailiftance  and  Comfoft ;  but  on  Monday 
lunk  again.] 

Tuefday,  May  10.  Was  in  the  fame  State,  as  to  my  Mind, 
that  I  have  been  in  for  fome  Time,  extremely  prefs'd  with  a 
Senfe  of  Guilt, Pollution,  Blindnefs  :  The  Iniquity  of  my  Heels  have 
(owpajjed  mc  about ;  the  Sins  of  my  Tcuth  have  been  fet  in  order 
before  me  ;  they  have  gone  over  my  Head,  as  an  heavy  Burden,  too 
1?eavyfor  me  to  bear,  Almoft  all  the  Adlions  of  my  Life  paft  feem 
to  be  cover'd  over  with  Sin  and  Guilt  ;  and  thofe  of  them  that  1 
performed  in  the  moft  confcientious  Manner,  now  fill  me  with 
Shame&Confurion,that  I  cannot  hold  up  myFace.  Oh  !  thcPride^ 
Seifi/Ii^^fSiHypocrify,  Ignorance, Biitermjs,Party'Zeal, &  x\izWant 

. : -^ 

*  On  the  laft  of  thefe  Days  he  wrote  the  firjl  Litter  ^Ai^X 
the  End  of  this  Hiftorv,  ^'  ^ 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.i;^^;  -yf 

of  Love,  Candour,  Meeknefs  and  Gentlenefs,tliat  have  attended 
my  Attempts  to  promote  Religion  and  Vertue  -,  and  this  when 
1  have  Reafon  fo  hope  I  had  real  Affiftance  from  above,and  fome 
fweec  Intercourfe  with  Heaven  !  But  alas,  what  corrupt  Mixtures 
attended  my  beft  Duties  I 

[  The  next  feven  Days,  his  Gloom  and  Diftrefs  continued, 
for  the  moft  Part :  but  he  had  feme  Turns  of  Relief  and  fpiri- 
tual  Comfort.  He  gives  an  Account  of  his  fpending  Part  of  this 
Time  in  hard  Labour, to  build  himfelf  a  little  Cottage  to  live  in  a- 
mongft  the  hdians^m  which  he  might.be  by  himfelf ;  having  ( it 
feems)  hitherto  lived  with  a  poor-Scotch-Man,  as  he  obferves  in 
theLetter  jufl  now  refei'd  to  in  the  Margin  ;  and  afterwards,be- 
forehis  own  Houfe  was  habitable,  lived  in  a  Wigwam  among 
the  Indians.  ] 

Wednefday,  May  i8.  My  Circumdances  are  fucb  that  I 
have  no  Comfort,  of  any  Kind,  but  what  I  have  in  God.*  I  live 
in  the  moft  lonefom  Wiidernefs ;  have  biit.one  Tingle  Perfon  to 
Converfe  with,-  tfeat  can  fpeak  EngUJh  :  ;*  Mofl  of  the  Talk  I 
hear,  is  either  Highland- Scotch  or  Indian,  I  have  no  Fellow- 
Chriftian  to  whom  I  might  unbofom  my  felf,  and  lay  open  my 
fpiritual  Sorrows,  and  with  whom  i  might  take  fweet  Counfel 
in  Converfation  about  heavenly  Things, and  join  in  fecial  Prayer. 
I  live  poorly  with  Regard  to  the  Comforts  of  Life  :  moft  of  my 
Diet  confiltsof boil'd  Corn,  Flafty- Pudding,  ^r.  Ilodgedha 
Bundle  of  Straw,and  mvLabour  is  hard  and  extreamly  difficult^ 
and  I  have  f  little  Appearance  of  Succefs,  to  comfort  me.  The 
Indians  Affairs  are  very  difjicult ;  having  no  Land  to  Xwq  on,  but 
what  the  Dutch  People  lay  Claim  to,  and  threatfq^o  drive  them 
©fF  from  ;  they  have  roRegard  m  the  Souls  of  the  poor  Indians  ; 
and, by  what  I  can  learn,  they  hatdfmejbecaiile  I  come  to  preach 
to  'em.—'  But  that  which  makes  al!  my  Difficulties  grievous  to 
be  born,  Is^  that  God  hides  his  face  from  me. 


*  This  Perfon  was  Mr.  Brainerd's  Interpreter ;  who  wa^aa. 
ingenious  young  Indian  belonging  i&'^tockbridgc,  vvhcfc 
Name  was  John  IVauwaumpeqiiunnaunt ^  who  had  b^en  in- 
flrudted  in  the  Chriftian  Religion  by  Mr.  Serge^int  ;  aiiJ 
had  lived  with  theRev.  Mr.  tPiliioms  of  Lting-Meadow.zw^ 
had  been  further  inftructeti  by  him,  at  the  Charge  oi  l^jr. 
1^  Mollis  of  London ;  and  underliood  both  Englijh  Z'\dJ/ioiaa 
"Ve/v  well,  aad  wrote  aggcd'Hand, 

Thuffdjy, 


;^2     y^/.  26.  ne   LIFE 

Thurfday,  May  19.  Spent  moft  of  this  Day  in  clofe  Studies  : 
But  was  fometimes  fo  diftrefs'djthat  1  could  think  of  nothing  but 
my  rpiritual  Blindnefs,  Ignorance,  Pride,  and  Mifery,  Oh,  I 
have  Reafon  to  make  that  Prayer,  Lord^  forgive  my  Sins  o/Touthy 
and  fornxer  Trefpafles  ! 

Friday,  May  io.  Was  much  perp]exed,fome  Part  of  theDay  ; 
tut  towards  Night,  had  fome  comfortable  Meditations  on  Ifai. 
xl.  I.  And  enjoyed  fome  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer.  Afterwards  my 
Soul  rofc  fo  far  above  the  deep  Waters^  that  I  dared  to  rejoyce  in 
God :  I  faw,  there  was  fufHcient  Matter  of  Confolation  in  the 
blcfTed  God. 

[  The  next  nine  Days,  his  Burdens  were  for  the  moft  Part 
alleviated  ;  but  with  Variety  :  at  fome  Times  having  confidcra- 
ble  Confolation,  and  at  other  Times  more  deprefTed.  The  next 
Day,  Monday,  May  30.  He  fet  out  onajourney  toNew-Jerfey^ 
to  confult  the  Commiffioners  that  employed  him  about  the 
Affairs  of  his  Miilion  :  f  performed  his  Journey  thither  in  four 
Days  ;  and  arrived  at  Mr.  Burr's  in  Newark  on  Thurfday.  In 
great  Part  of  his  Journey,  he  was  in  the  Depths  of  Melancholy, 
under  like  Difireffes  with  thofe  already  mentioned.  On  Friday, 
he  rode  to  Etifabeth-Town  j  and  on  Saturday  to  New-Tor k  ;  and 
from  thence  on  his  way  Homewards  as  far  as  White-Plains ; 
where  he  (pent  the  Sabbath,  and  had  confiderable  Degrees  of 
divine  Confolation  andAfTiftance  in  publick  Services.  On  Mon- 
day, he  rode  about  60  Miles  xoNew- Haven.  There  he  attempted 
a  Reconciliation  with  the  Authority  of  the  College  i  and  fpent 
this  Week  in  vifuing  his  Friends  in  thofe  Parts,  and  in  his  Jour- 
ney Homewards,  *till  Saturday,  in  a  pretty  comfortable  Frame 
of  Mind.  On  Saturday,  in  his  Way  from  Stockbridge  to  Kau- 
naumeik,  he  was  loft  in  the  Woods,  and  lay  all  Night  in  the  open 
Air  ;  but  happily  found  his  Way  in  the  Morning,  and  came  to 
his  Indians  onLord'^-Day,  June  12.  And  had  greater  Affiftance 
in  Preaching  among  them  than  ever  beforCjfince  his  iirft  coming 
*mong  them.] 


t  His  Bufinefs  with  the  CommiiHoncrs  now  was,  to  obtain 
Orders  from  them  to  fet  up  a  School  among  the  Indians  at 
Kaunaumeek^sind  that  his  Interpreter  might  be  appointed  the 
School- Maftcr ;  Which  was  accordingly  done. 


of  Mr.  Divid  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 74^.      73 

[From  thisTime  forward  be  was  the  Subjed  of  variousFramcs 
and  Exercifes  of  Mind  :  But  it  fecms,  in  the  general,  to  have 
been  with  him  much  after  the  fame  Manner  as  it  had  been  hi- 
therto from  his  firft  coming  to  Kaunaumeek^  'till  he   got  into 
his  own  Houfe  (a  little  Hut^  that  he  made  chiefly  witli  his  own 
Hands, with  long  and  hardLabour)  which  was  near  fcvenVVeeks 
froni  this  Time.     Great  Part  of  this  Space  of  Time,  he  w'as  de- 
jeded  and  deprefled  with  Melancholy,    and  fometimcs  very  ex- 
treamly  :  his  Melancholy  operating  in  like  Manner  as  has  been 
related  of  Times  paft.     How  it  was  with  him  in  thofe  dark  Sea- 
fons,  he  himfclf  further  defcribes  in  his  Diary  for  Juh  2.  in  the 
following  Manner.     My  Soul  island  has  for  a  longTime  been  in  a 
piteous  Condition^wading  thro*  a  Series  of  Sorrows^  of  various  Kinds, 
1  have  been  fo  crufi'  d  down  fometimes  with  a  Senje  of  my  Meannefs 
and  infinite  Unworthinefs^   that  1  have  been  ajhamed  that  any  even 
the  meanefi  of  my  Fellow- Creatures  fhould  fo  much  as  fpend  a  Thought 
about  me^l^  have  wiJ})^dfometimes  while  1  have  travelled  among  tbg 
thick  Brakes,    as   one  of  them^   to  drop  into  everiajiing  Oblivion, 
In  this  Cafe^  fometimes,  1  have  almaji  rejolved  never  again  to  fee 
any  of  my  Acquaintance  ;  and  really  thought,  1  could  not  doit  and 
hold  up   my  Face  \  and  have  longed  for  the  remoteji  Region^   for  a 
Retreat  from  all  my  Friends,  that  I  might  not  be  feen  or  heard  of  any 
more. —Sometimes  the  Confideration  of  my  Ignorance  has  been  a  Means 
of  my  great  Difirefs  and  Anxiety,     And  efpecially  my  Soul  has  been 
in  Anguij})  with  Fear,  Shame,  and  Guilt,   that  ever  1  had  preach' d^ 
or  had  anyThought  thatfVay.—-  Sometimes  my  Soul  has  been  inDiJJrefs 
on  feeling  feme  particular  Corruptions  rife  and  fwell  like  a  mighty 
Torrent,  with  prefent  Violence  ;  having  at  the  fame  Time,  tenThou- 
fand former  Sins  and  FoIIJcj  prefented  to  View,  in  all  their Blacknefs 
and  Aggravations*--'  And  tkefe  attended  with  fuch external  Circum- 
Jiances  as  mine  at  prefent  are  ;  deflitute  of  moji  cfthe  Conveniences  of 
Life^  and  1  may  fay,  of  all  the  Plea  fares  of  it  ;  without  a  Friend  /# 
communicate  any  of  my  Sorrows  to,  andfometimes  without  any  Plact 
of  Retirement,  where  1  mav  unburden  my  Soul  before  God.iuhich  has 
greatly  contributed  to  my  Difirefs.— -  Of  late,  more  efpecially  ^  my 
great  Difficulty  has  been  a   Sort  of  Carelefnefs,  a  Kind  of  regardlefs 
Temper  of  Mind,  whence  1  have  been  difpofed  to  Indolence  and  Tri- 
filng  :  And  this  Temper  of  Mind  has  confiantly  been  attended  with 
Guilt  and  Shame  ;  fo  that  fometimes  1  have  been  in  a   Kind  of 
Horror,'  to  find  myfelffo  unlike  tbe  bleffed  God ;  and  have  thought 
I  grew  worfe  under  all  my  Trials  ;  and  nothing  has  cut  and  woundc  ' 
my  Soul  more  than  This.  Oh.,  if  J  am  one  of  God's  chofen^  as  Itrufi 
thr^  infinite  Grace  I  am^  I  find  of  a  Truth,  that  the  righteous  ^^re 
(carcely  faved  J-  L  *^^ 


74 


muiS.  «^LIFE 


*Tis  apparent  that  one  mainOccafion  of  that  diftreflingGIoo- 
mlnefs  of  Mind  which  he  was  fo  much  exercifed  with  ztKaunaw 
meek,  was  Refledion  on  his  paft  Errors  and  mifguided  Zeal  at 
College^  in  the  Beginning  of  the  late  religious  Commotions  in 
the  Land.  And  therefore  he  repeated  his  Endeavours  this  Year 
for  Reconciliation  with  the  Governours  of  the  College,  whom 
he  had  in  that  Time  offended.  Aliho'  he  had  been  at  New^ 
Haven  in  June,  this  Year,  and  had  attempted  a  Reconciliation, 
as  has  been  mentioned  already,  yet  in  the  Beginning  of  July,  he 
made  another  Journey  thither,  and  renewed  his  Attempt,  but 
ftill  in  vain. 

Altho*  he  was  much  dejeded,   great  Part  of  that  Space  of 
Time  that  I  am  now  fpeakmg  of,  yet  there  were  many  Inter- 
miirions  of  his  Melancholy,  and  fome  Seafpns  of  Comfo  rt,fwect 
Tranquillity  and  Refignation  of  Mind,    and   frequent  fpecial 
AfTilhnce  in  publick  Services,  that  he  fpeaks  of  in  his  Diary. 
The  Manner  of  his  Relief  from  his  Sorrow,  once  in  particular, 
is  worthy  to  be  mentioned  in  his  own  Words,   in  his  Diary  for 
July  25,  which  are  as  follows  :   Had  little  or  no  Refolution  for  a 
Life  of  Holinefs  ;  was  ready  almoft  to  renounce  my  Hopes  of  living 
to  God,     And  Oh  how  dark  it  looked,   to  think  of  being  unholy  for 
ever  !     This  J  could  not  endure.     The  Cry  of  my  Soul  was  ihat, 
P/<2/.lxv.  3.  Iniquities  prevail  againft  me.     But  was  in  fomeMea- 
fure  relieved  by  a  comfortable  Meditation  en  God's  Eternity,  That  hi 
never  had  a  Beginning,  &c.  Whence  1  was  led  to  admire  his  Great' 
nefs  and  Power  &c.   in  fuch  a  Manner,  that  Ijioodjiill  i^  prais'd 
the  Lord  for  his  own  Glories   and  PerfeSfions  ;    tho*  1  was    {and 
if  I  Jhouid  forever  be)   an  unholy  Creature,  my  Soul  was  comforted 
to  apprehend  an  eternal,  infinite,  powerful.  Holy  God.} 

Saturday,  July  30.  Juft  at  Night,  moved  into  my  ownHoufe^ 
and  lodged  there  that  Night  ;  found  it  much  better  fpendingthc 
Time  alone  in  my  own  Houfe,  than  in  the  Wigwam  where  I 
was  before. 

f.ord's-Day,  July  31.  Felt  more  comfortably  than  fomeDays 
pa-a^.—  BlefTed  be  the  Lord,  that  has  now  given  me  a  Place 
of  Retirement.--  O  that  I  might  find  God  in  it,  and  that  he 
wc»iild  dwell   with  me  for  ever. 

Monday,   Au^.  i.  Was  ftiil  bufy  in  further  Labours  on  my 

Houfe.  — Felt  a  little  of  the  Sweefnefs  of  Religion,  and  thought 

n  was  worth   the  while   to  follow  after  God  thro*   a  Thoufand 

Snares,  Defarts,anu Death  it  fclf.     O  that  I  might  always  fdlow 

iiiUT  H^linej},  that  i  may  be  fullv  conformed    to  God..   Tnad 

foms 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.DLi  743 .     75 

fome  Degree  of  Sweetnefs,  in  fecret  Prayer,  tho'  I  had  much 
Sorrow. 

Tuefday,  Aug.  1.  Was  ftill  labouring  to  make  my  fclf  more 
comfortable  with  Regard  to  my  Houfe  and  Lodging.  Laboured 
under  fpiritual  Anxiety  ;  It  feem'd  to  me,  1  deferved  to  be 
kick'd  out  of  the  World  5  yet  found  fome  Comfort  \n  committing 
my  Cauje  fo  God.  'Tis  good  for  me  to  be  offliSied^  that  1  may  die 
wholly  to  this  World  and  all  that  is  in  it. 

Wednefday,  Aug.  3.     Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Wiiting. 
Enjoyed  fome  Senfe  of  Religion.      Thro'  divine  Goodnefs  I  am 
now  uninterruptedly  alone  \  and  find  my  Retirement  comforta- 
ble.    I  have  enjoyed  more  Senfe  of  divine  Things  within  a  few 
Days  laft  paft,  than  for  fomeTime  before.     I  longed  after  Holi- 
nefs,Humility&  Meeknefs  :  O  thatGod  would  enable  rne  \.Q.pQfi 
the  Time  of  my  fojourning  here  in  his  Pear^  and  always  live  to  him, 
Thurfday,  Aug,  4.     Was  enabled  to  pray  much,  thro'  iho 
wholeDay  ;  and  thro'  divine  Goodnefs  found  fome  Intcnfenefs 
of  Soul  in  the  Duty,  as  I  ufed  to  do,  anc*  fome  Ability  to  pcrfe- 
vere  in  my  Supplications  :   Had  fome  Apprchenfiorjs  of  divine 
Things,  that  were  engaging, and  thatgaveme  fome  Courage  and 
Refolution.    'Tis  good,  I  find,  to  perfevere  in  Attanpti  to   pray, 
if  I  can't  pray  with  Perfeverance^  i.  e.  continue  long  in  my  Ad- 
drefTes  to  the  divincBeing.  I  have  generally  found,  that  the  more 
1  do  in  fecret  Prayer,  the  more  1  have  delighted  to  do,  and  have 
enjoyed  more  of  a  Spirit  of  Prayer  :  and  frequently  have  found 
the  contrary,   when  with  Journeying  or  otherwife,  I  have  been 
much  deprived  of  Retirement.     A  fcafonable  f^eadyPerformance 
of  fecret  Duties  in  their  proper  Hours^Sc  a  careful  Improvement 
of  all  Time,  filling  up  every  Hour  with  fome  profitable  Labour, 
either  of  Heart, Head, or  Hant's,  are  excellent  Means  of  fpiritual 
Peace  and  Boldnefs  before  God.   Chrili  indeed  is  our  Peart ^  and 
by  him  we  have  Boldnefs  of  Accefs  to  God ;   but  a  good  Confcietice, 
void  of  Offence^  is  an  excellent  Preparation  for  an  Approach  mio 
the  divine  Prefence.     There  is  Difference  between  SeifConf'  ^ 
dence  and  a  Self-righteous  pUofmg  ourfelves  (wiih  our  ownDuties, 
Attainments,  and  fpiritual  Enjoyments)  which  godlySouls  lomc- 
times  are  guilty  of,   and  that   holy  Confidence  arifmg  from  the 
Tel^imony  of  a  good  Confcicnce,   which  good  Hezekijh  had 
when  he  fays,  Remember^   O  Lord^  I  bejeech  lihee^  how  J  have 
walked  before  thee  in  Truth  and  with  a  perfect  Heart.     Then  (Oys 
the  holy  Pfalmii!)  /hall  I  not  be  afhamedy  when  ]  have  Relpeff  to 
all  thy  Commandments.     Prilling  up  our  Time  with  and  V  God 
is  ihc  Way  to  rife  up  and  lie  down  in  Peace. 

L  2  [The 


/ 


5    ^/.  26.  K^^  LIFE 


[  The  next  eight  Days,  lie  continued  for  the  moft  Part  in  a 
very  comfortable  Frame,  having  his  Mind  fixed  and  fweedy  en- 
gaged in  Religion  ;  and  more  than  once  bleflesGodjihat  he  had 
given  him  a  \ht\cCottagey  where  he  might  live  alone,  and  enjoy 
a  l»ppy  Retirement,  free  from  Noife  and  Difturbance,  and 
could  at  any  Hour  of  the  Day  lay  afide  all  Studies,  and  fpend 
Time  in  lifting  up  his  Soul  to  God  for  fpiritual  BlefHngs.] 

Saturday,  Ji/g,  13.  Was  enabled  in  fecretPrayer  to  raife  my 
Soul  to  God,  with  Defire  and  Delighr.  It  was  indeed  a  blefTed" 
Seafon  to  my  Soul  :  I  found  the  Comfort  of  being  a  Cbriftian  : 
/  counted  the  Sufferings  of  the  prefent  Life  not  worthy  to  he 
compared  with  the  Glory  of  divine  Enjoyments,  even  in  this 
World.  All  my  paft  Sorrows  feemed  kindly  to  difappear, 
and*I  remembrednomore  the  Sorrow^  for  Joy  -—  O,  how  kindly, 
and  with  what  a  filial  Tendernefs,  the  Soul  hangs  on,  and  con- 
fides in  the  Rock  of  j^ges^zi  fuch  a  Seafon,  that  he  will  never  leave 
it  nor  for  fake  it,  that  he  will  caufe  all  Things  to  work  together 
for  its  Good^  Uc  /  1  longed,  that  others  fhould  know  how 
good  a  God  the  Lord  is.  My  Soul  was  full  of  Tendernefs  and 
J^ove,  evfen  to  the  moft  inveterate  of  my  Enemies :  1  long'd 
they  iLould  (hare  in  the  fame  Mercy.  1  loved  and  longed 
that  God  fhould  do  juft  as  he  pleafed,  with  me  and  every 
Thing  elfe.  I  felt  exceeding  ferious,  calm  and  peaceful, 
tnd  encouraged  to  prefs  after  Holinefs  as  long  as  I  live,  whatever 
Di'^culties  and  Trials  may  be  m  my  Way.  May  the  Lord 
always  help  mc  fo  to  do  .-    AmeUy  and  Jmen  ! 

Lord's-Day,  Aug.  14.  I  had  much  more  Freedom  in  publick, 
than  in  private.  God  enabled  me  to  fpeak  with  foroe  feeling 
I'enfe  of  divine  Things  ;  but  perceived  no  confiderable  Effc61. 

Monday,  Aug.  15.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Labour  to  pro- 
cure fomething  to  kee^  my  Horfe  on  in  the  Winter.— -Enjoyed 
not  much  Sweetnefs  in  the  Morning  :  Was  very  v^eak  in  Body, 
through  the  Day,  and  tho*t  this  frail  Body  would  focn  drop 
into  ibeDufl  :  Had  u^me  very  lealizingApprehenfionsof  a  fpeedy 
Entrance  into  another  World.  And  in  this  weak  State  of 
Body,  was  not  a  little  diftrefled  for  want  of  fuitable  Food.  Had 
no  Bicad ,  nor  could  I  get  any.  I  am  forced  to  go  or  fend  ten  or 
^Uciin  Miles  for  all  the  Bread  I  eat  ;  and  Icmctimcs  'tis  mouldy 
and  foure,  before  i  eat  it,  if  1  get  any  confiderable  Quantity  : 
And  then  again  I  have  rone  for  feme  Days  together,  for  want 
o»'  2!V  Opportunity  to  fend  for  it,  aiid  can*t  find  my  Horfe  h\ 
the  VV^o.:)d  3  to  go  my  felf  ;  ?.nd  this  was  my  Cafe  now:  But 
tfe.'o'  divine  CiOodnef*  i  hft«l  f*mc  Indian  Meai,  of  whi'cj.  ;'' 


(9/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1743.     77 

made  little  Cakes,  and  fried  them.  Yet  felt  contented  with  my 
Circumftances,  and  fvveetly  refigned  to  God.  In  Prayer  I  en- 
joyed great  Freedom  ;  and  blefs'd  God  as  much  for  my  prefent 
Circumftances,  as  if  I  had  been  a  King  ;  and  thought,  I  found 
a  Difpofition  to  be  contented  in  any  Circumftances  •  BlciTed  be 
God  ! 

[The  reft  of  this  Week,  he  was  exceeding  weak  in  Body 
and  much  cxercifed  with  Pain  ;  and  yet  obliged  from  Day  to 
"Day  to  labour  hard,  to  procure  Fodder  for  his  Horfe  ;  except- 
ing fome  Part  of  the  Time  he  was  fo  very  ill,  that  he  was  neither 
able  to  work  nor  ftudy  :  But  fpeaks  of  Longings  afterHolinefs  and 
per fe6l  Conformity  to  God  ;  complains  of  enjoying  but  little 
of  God  ;  yet  fays,  That  little  was  better  to  him,  than  all  the 
World  befides.  In  his  Diary  for  Saturday,  he  fays.  He  was 
fomething  Melancholy  and  forrowful  in  Mind  ;  and  adds,  / 
never  feel  comfortably^  but  when  1  find  Tiiy  Soul  gmng  forth  after 
God  :  If  lean* t  be  holy,   I  mufi  necfijfarily  be  mi fer able  for  ever. ^ 

Lord's-Day,  Aug.  21.  Was  much  ftraiten'd  in  theForenoon- 
Exercife  :  my  Thoughts  feem*d  to  be  all  fcatter'd  to  the  Ends 
of  the  Earth.  At  Noon,  I  fell  down  before  the  Lord,  and 
groan'd  under  my  Vilenefs,  Barrennefs,  Dcadncfs,  and  felt  as  if 
I  was  guilty  of  Soul-Murther,  in  fpeaking  to  immortal  Souls  in 
fuch  a  Manner  as  I  had  then  done.—-  In  the  Afternoon,  God 
was  pleas'd  to  give  me  fome  Afliftance,  and  I  was  enabled  to 
fet  before  my  Hearers  the  Nature  and  Neceftity  of  true  Repen*- 
tance,  ls?c.  Afterwards  had  fome  fcnall  Degree  of  Thankfulnefs. 
Was  very  ill  and  full  of  Pain  in  the  Evening  ;  and  my  Soul 
mourned  that  I  had  fpent  fo  much  Time  to  fo  little  Profit. 

Monday,  Aug.  22.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Study  ;  and 
found  my  bodily  Strength  in  a  Meafure  reftored.  Had  fome 
intenfe  and  paflionate  Breathings  of  Soul  after  Holinef:?,  and 
very  clear  Manifeifations  of  my  utter  Inability  to  procure.  Or 
work  it  in  my  felf  ;  'tis  wholly  owing  to  the  Power  of  Goc'. 
O,  with  what  Tendernefs  the  Love  and  Defire  of  Holinefs 
fills  the  Soul  !  I  wanted  to  wing  out  of  my  felf,  (o  God  ;  or 
rather  to  get  a  Conformity  to  'Him  :  But  alas,  I  can't  add  to  my 
Stature  in  Grace  one  Cubit.  Hov;cver,  my  Soul  csn  nevi  r 
leave  ftriving  for  i(  ;  or  at  Icafl  groaning,  th:5t  it  can't  ftrive 
for  it,  and  obtain  more  Purity  of  FIcart.  -—  At  Night,  I  fpenc 
fomsTime  in  inflruc^ing  my  poor  People  :  Ob, that  God  \vou!d 
pity  their  Souls. 

Tuefday,  /far.  23.  Studied  in  the  Forenoon,  and  cij'"\'d 
ume  FiCC'Jom.  ''  In  the  Afternoonj  li»bou;ed  Abroad  :    Effrfei- 


78       JEf.  26.  ne  LIFE 

voured  to  pray  mtich  ;  but  found  not  much  Swcetnefs  or  In- 
tenfenefs  of  Mind.  Towards  Night,  was  very  weary,  &  tir'd 
of  this  World  of  Sorrow  :  The  Thoughts  of  Death  &  Immor- 
tality appeared  very  defirablcjand  even  refrelh'd  my  Soul.  Thofe 
Lines  turned  in  my  Mind  with  PJeafure, 

Com,  Death,  Jhake  Hands  ;  Vll  kifs  ib'^  Bands  : 
'T:s  Happimfs  for  me  to  die. 
What  !  Do/i  thou  think,  that  Iwilljhrink  ? 
ni  go  to  Immortality, 

In  Evening-Prayer,  God  was  pleafed  to  draw  near  my  Soul, 
tho' very  finful  and  unworthy  :  Was  enabled  to  wreftle  with 
God,  and  to  perfevere  in  my  Requefts  for  Grace  :  I  poured  out 
my  Soul  for  all  the  World,  Friends  and  Enemies.  My  Soul 
was  concerned,  not  fo  much  for  Souls  as  fuch,  but  rather  for 
Chrift's  Kingdom,  that  it  might  appear  in  the  World,  that  God 
might  be  known  to  be  God,  in  the  whole  Earth.  And  Oh,  my 
Soul  abhor'd  the  very  Thought  of  a  Party  in  Religion  !  Let  the 
Truth  of  God  appear,  wherever  it  is  ;  and  God  have  theGlory 
for  ever.  Amen.  This  was  indeed  a  comfortable  Seafon  :  I 
tho't  I  had  fome  fmall  Tafte  of,  and  real  Relifh  for  the  Enjoy- 
ments and  Employments  of  the  upper  World.  O  that  mySoul 
was  more  atremper'd  to  it. 

Wednefday,  Aug.  24.  Spent  fome  Time,  in  the  Morning, in 
Study  and  Prayer.  Afterwards,  was  engaged  in  fome  necefiary 
Bufinefs  Abroad.  Towards  Night,  found  a  littleTime  for  fome 
particular  Scudies.  I  thought,  ifGodfhould  fay,  Ceafe  making 
Am  Provifion  for  this  Lifgy  for  you  fljall  in  a  few  Days  go  out  of 
Time  into  Eternity.,  my  Soul  would  leap  for  Joy.  O  that  I  may 
both  deftre  to  be  dijfolvedto  be  with  Chrift^  and  like  wife  wait  pati- 
intly  all  the  Days  of  my  appointed  Time  Uill  my  Change  come. -  —  But 
alas,  I  am  very  unfit  for  the  Bufinefs  3*  Bleffednefs  of  Heaven.— 
O  for  more  Holinefs. 

Tbuifday,  Aug.  25.  Part  of  the  Day,  engaged  in  Studies  ; 
and  part,  in  Labour  Abroad.  I  find,  'tis  impoiTible  to  enjoy 
Peace  and  Tranquillity  of  Mind  without  a  careful  Improvement 
of  Time.  This  is  really  an  Imitation  of  God  and  Chriii  Jefus  : 
My  Father  war keth  hitherto^  and  1  work,  fays  our  Lord.  But 
ftill,  if  we  would  belike  God,  we  mud  fee  that  we  fill  up  our 
Time  for  him.--- 1  daily  long  to  dwell  in  perfe(ft  Light  &  Love. 
In  the  mean  Time  my  Soul  mourn^-,  that  1  make  To  little  Pro- 
grefs  in  (jracc  atid  Preparation  for  the  World  of  BleUVdncfs  :  { 
fef  aiwi  kflQw  that  i  am  a  very  barren  Tree  in  God's  Vineyard 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1743.     79 

and  that  he  might  juftly  fay.  Cut  it  down  &c.  O  that  God 
would  make  me  more  lively  and  vigorous  in  Grace;  for  his  own 
Glory  !     Amen, 

[The  two  nextDays,  he  was  much  engaged  in  fome  neceflary 
Labours,  in  whicl^heextreamly  fpent  himfelf.  He  fcems,ihe(e 
Days  to  have  had  a  great  Senfe  of  the  Vanity  of  the  World  ; 
and  continued  Longings  after  Holincfs,  and  more  Fervency  of 
Spirit  in  the  Service  of  God.] 

LordVDay,  Aug.  28.  Was  much  perp!ex*d  with  fome  irre* 
ligious  Dutch-men.  AH  their  Difcourfe  turned  upon  tbcThings 
of  the  World  :  which  was  nofmall  Exercife  to  m/  Mind.  Oh, 
what  a  HeH  it  would  be  to  fpend  an  Eternity  wih  fuch  Men  ! 
Well  mi^tDavid  fay,  1  beheld  theTranfgrtJfors^iff  was  grieved. — 
But,  adored  be  God,  Heaven  is  a  Place,  into  which  no  unclean 
Thing  enters.  Oh,  I  long  for  the  Holinefs  of  that  World  !  Lord, 
prepare  me  therefor. 

[The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  a  Journey  to  New-Tork.  Was 
fomething  dejeded,  the  two  firft  Days  of  his  Journey  ;  but  yet 
feems  to  have  enjoyed  fome  Degrees  of  the  fcnfibie  Prefence  of 
God.] 

Wednefday,  Aug.  31.  Rode  down  to  Bethlehem  :  Was  in  a 
fweet,  ferious,  and,  I  hope,  Chriftian  Frame,  when  I  came 
there  ;  Eternal  Things  engrofs'd  all  my  Thoughts ;  and  I  long'd 
to  be  in  the  World  of  Spirits.  O  how  happy  i$  it,  to  have  all 
our  Thoughts  fwallowed  up  in  that  World  ;  to  feci  one's  kli  a 
ferious  confiderate  Stranger  in  this  World,  diligently  feeking  a 
Road  thro*  it,  the  bcft,  the  furc  Road  to  the  heavenly  Jeru* 
falem  ! 

Thurfday,  Sepiemh.  i.  Rode  to  Danbury.  Was  more  dull 
and  dejected  in  Spirit,  than  Yefterday.  Indeed,  I  always  feci 
comfortably,  when  God  realizes  Death  and  the  Things  of  ano- 
ther  World  to  my  Mind  :  Whenever  my  Mind  is  taken  cfF 
from  the  Things  of  this  World,  and  fet  on  God,  my  Soul  is 
then  at  Reft. 

[He  went  forward  on  his  Journey,  and  came  toNefv-Tofi  on 
the  next  Monday.  And  after  tarrying  there  two  or  threeDnys, 
fet  out  from  theCity  towzrdsNeW'fJaveny  intending  to  be  there 
^t  fhe  Commencement ;  and  on  Friday  came  to  Horfe-^tck, 

In 


go    JEi.  16.  ne  LIFE 

In  the  mean  T/me,  he  complains  much  of  Duhicfs,  and  Want 
of  Fervour  in  Religion  :  But  yet  from  Time  to  Time,  fpeaks 
ofhis  enjoying  fpiritual  Warmth  and  Sweetnefs  in  Converfation 
with  Chriftian  Friends,  AfTiftanoe  in  publick  Services,  ^V.] 

Saturday,  Sept*  10.  Rode  fix  Miles  to  Sianwich,  and  preach*d 
to  a  confiderable  Ailembly  of  People.  Had  fomc  AiTiftance 
and  Freedom,  efpecialiy  towards  the  Clofe.  Endeavoured  much 
afterwards,  in  private  Converfation,  to  eftabiijfh  Holiaefs,  Hu- 
mility, Meeknefs  i2fc,  as  the  Eflence  of  true  Religion  ;  and  to 
moderate  fome  noify  Sort  of  Perfons,  that  appeared  to  me  to  be 
ad^ed  by  unfeen  fpiritualPride.  Alas,whatExtreams  Men  incline 
to  run  into  I — Returned  ioHorfe-Neck^zn^  felt  fome  Serioufnefs 
and  fweet  Solemnity  in  the  Eveaing. 

LordVDay,  Sept,  11.  In  the  Afternoon,  preach'd  from 
*ritus  iii.  8.  I  think,  God  never  helped  me  more  in  painting  out 
true  Religion,  and  in  detecting  clearly,  and  tenderly  difcounte- 
nancingfalfe  Appearances  of  Religion,  Wild-fire  Party- Zeal, 
fpiritual  Pride,  ^c,  as  well  as  a  confident  dogmatical  Spirit,and 
it's  Spring,  viz.  Ignorance  of  the  Heart--—  In  the  Evening, 
took  much  Pains  in  private  Converfation  to  fupprefs  fome  Con- 
fufions,  that  I  perceived  were  amongft  that  People. 
"  Monday,  Sept,  12.  Rode  to  Mr.  Miih's  at  Ripton,  Had 
feme  perplexing  Hours  ;  but  wzs  fome  Part  of  the  Day  very 
comfortable.  'Tis  through  great  Trials^  J  fee,  that  we  wuj}  enter 
the  Gates  of  Pcradife,  If  my  Soul  could  but  be  Holy,  that  God 
might  not  be  difhonoured,  melhinks,  I  could  bear  Sorrows. 

Tuefday,  Sept.  13.  Rode  to  New-Haven,  Was  fometimes 
<3eje6led  ;  not  ip  the  fweeteft  PVame.  Lodged  at  ****.  Had 
feme  profitable  Chrifiian  Converfation,  i^c.—'l  find,tho*  my  in- 
ward Trials  are  great,  and  a  Life  of  Solitude  gives  'em  greater 
Advantage  to  fettle  and  penetrate  to  the  very  iumoft  Recefles  of 
the  Soul ;  yet  'tis  better  to  be  alone,  than  incumbeiM  withNoife 
and  Tumult.  I  find  it  very  difKcult  maintaining  any  Senfe  of 
diviae  Things,  while  removing  from  Place  to  Place,  diverted 
with  new  Objedts,  and  fili'd  with  Care  and  Bufinefs.  A  fettled 
lieady  Bufinefs  is  befl  adapted  to  a  Life  of  ftri(Sl  Religion. 

Wednefday,  Sept,  14.  This  Day  I  ought  to  have  taken  my 
Degree  -,  *  but  God  fees  fit  to  deny  it  me.  And  iho'  I  was 
greatly  afraid  of  being  overwhelmed  with  Perplexity  aad  Con- 
fuMon,  when  I  fhould  fee  my  Clafs- Mates  take   theirs  5  yet,  in 


This  being  Commencement  Da  v. 

.       tht 


cf  Mr.  David  Braiaerd.     A.D.  1 743.     g  j 

the  very  Seafon  of  it,  God  enabled  me  with  CaJmnefs  and  Re- 
fignation  to  hy  ^ThePyUl  of  the  lord  bs  done.  Indeed,  thro'  divine 
Goodnefs,  I  have  fcarcely  felt  my  Mind  fo  calm,  fedate  and 
comfortable  for  fome  Time.  I  have  long  fearM  this  Seafon  and 
cxpeifted  my  Humility,  Meeknefs,  Patience  and  Refignation 
would  be  much  tried  f  :  But  found  much  more  Plcafure  and 
divine  Comfort,  than  I  expedted. —  Felt  fpiritually  Serious,  ten- 
der and  AfFecSlionate  in  private  Prayer  with  a  dear  Chriftian 
Friend  to  Day, 

Thurfday,  Sept.  15.  Had  fome  Satisfaaion  in  hearing  the 
Miniflers  difcourfe  ^r.  'Tis  always  a  Comfort  to  me,  to 
hear  religious  and  fpiritual  Difcourfe.  O  that  Minifters  and 
People  were  more  fpiritual  and  devoted  to  God.—  Towards 
Night,  with  the  Advice  of  Chriftian  Friends,  I  offered  the  folr 
lowing  Reflexions  in  Writing,  to  the  Reilor  andTruJiees  of  ihi 
College  (  which  are  for  Subftance  the  fame  that  f  had  freely  of- 
fered to  the  ReSfor  before,  and  intreated  him  to  accept)  and  this 
I  did  that  if  poffible  I  might  cut  off  allOccafion  of  Scumbling  and 
Offence,  from  thofe  that  feek  Occafion.  What  I  offered,  is 
as  follows. 

«'  Whereas  I  have  faid  before  feveralPerfons, concerning  Mr. 
<«  Whitielfey^  one  of  the  Tutors  of  Tale  College.,  that  /  did  not 
"  believe  he  had  any  more  Grace^than  theCkair  J  then  tean'd  upon  ; 
•'  I  humbly  confefs,  that  herein  I  have  fm'd  againft  God,  and 
*«  adled  fcontrary  to  the  Rules  of  his  Word,  and  have  injured 
«'  Mr.TFhittelfey.  I  had  no  Right  to  make  thus  free  w/th  his 
*'  Charad^er  ;  and  had  no  juftReafon  to  fay  as  I  did  concerning 
«<  him.  My  Fault  herein  was  the  rhore  Aggravated,  in  thatl 
•'  faid  this  concerningOne  that  was  fo  much  my  Supcriour,  and 
<'  one  that  I  was  obliged  to  treat  with  fpecial  Refped  and  Ho- 
<«  nour,  by  Reafon  of  the  Relation  I  flood  in  to  him  in  the 
'«  College.  Such  a  Manner  of  Behaviour,  I  confefs,  did  not 
*'  become  a  Chriftian  5  it  was  taking  too  much  upon  me,  and 


His  Trial  was  the  greater,  in  that,  had  it  not  been  for  the 
Difpleafure  of  the  Governcurs  of  the  College, he  would  not 
only  on  that  Day  have  fhared  with  his  Clafs- Mates  in  the 
pubiick  Honours  which  they  then  received,  but  would  on 
that  Occafion  have  appeared  at  the  Head  of  thatX^Iafs  5 
which,  if  he  had  been  with  them, would  have  been  ihi  moll 
numerous  of  anv  that  ever  had  been  graduated  at  that 
Ccllt'ge.  '  ^. , 

M  M 


gz       JEi.iS.  The   LIFE 

<«  did  not  favour  of  that  humble  Refpedl,  that  I  ought  to  have 
««  exprefsM  towards  Mr.  IVhitufsy.  I  have  long  fince  been 
«<  convinced  of  the  Falfenefs  of  thofe  Jpprehenfiom^  by  which  I 
««  then  juftified  fuch  a  Condu6t.  I  have  often  refledled  on  this 
««  A£l  with  Grief;  I  hope,  on  Account  of  the  «Si«  of  it  : 
««  And  am  willing  to  lie  low,  and  be  abafed  beforeGod  andMan 
««  for  it.  And  humbly  afk  the  Forgivenefs  of  the  Governcurs 
<<  of  the  College,  and  of  the  whole  Society  ;  but  of  Mr.  Whit- 
<«  telfty  in  particular.  And  whereas  I  have  been  accufed  by  one 
**  Perfon  of  faying  concerning  the  Rev.  Re£ior  of  TaU-Colhge^ 
**  that  /  wondered  he  did  not  expeSf  to  drop  down  dead  for  fining 
««  theSchoLrs  that  followed  Mr, Tennentio  Milford  ;  Iferioufly 
««  profefs,  that  I  don't  remember  my  faying  any  Thing  to  this 
*<  Purpofe.  But  if  I  did,  which  I  am  not  certain  I  did  not,  I 
*«  utterly  condemn  it,  and  deie/i  all  fuch  Kind  of  Behaviour  ; 
<<  and  especially  in  an  Undergraduate  towards  the  Redlor.  And 
«<  I  now  appear,  to  judge  and  condemn  my  felf  for  going  once  to 
*«  the  feparate  Meeting  in  New-Haven,  a  little  before  I  wasex- 
«*  peird,  tho*  the  ReSfor  had  refufed  to  give  me  Leave,  For  this 
*'  1  humbly  afk  the  Rector's  Forgivenefs.  And  whether  the 
«'  Governoursof  the  College  fhall  ever  fee  Caufe  to  remova 
««  the  Academical  Cenfure  I  lie  under,  or  no,  or  to  admit  me 
*<  to  the  Priviledges  I  defire  ;  yet  I  am  willing  to  appear,  if 
«*  they  think  fit,  openly  to  own,  and  to  humble  ray  felf  for 
•«  thofe  Things  I  have  herein  confefsM.'* 

God  ha?  made  me  willing  to  do  any  Thing,  that  I  can  do, 
Gonfiftent  with  Truth,  fcr  the  Sake  of  Peace,  and  that  I  might 
not  be  a  Stumbling-block  and  OfFence  to  others.  For  thisRea- 
ion  I  can  cheerfully  forego,  and  give  up  what  I  verily  believe, 
after  the  mofl  mature  and  impartial  Search,  is  my  Right, in  fome 
Inftances.  God  has  given  me  that  Difpofition,  that  if  this  were 
the  Cnfe,  that  a  Man  has  done  me  an  hundred  Injuries^  and  I 
ftho'  ever  fo  much  provoked  to  it)  have  done  Him  one,  I  feel 
difpofed,  and  heartily  v/il!ing  humbly  to  confefs  myFauIt  to  him, 
and  on  my  Knees  to  afk  Forgivenefs  of  him  ;  tho'  at  the  fame 
Time  he  fhouid  jufiify  himfelf  in  all  the  Injuries  he  has  done  me, 
and  fhouid  only  make  Ufcof  my  humble  Con fcHion  to  blacken 
mv  Chara<Sier  the  more,  and  reprcfcnt  me 'as  the  only  Perfon 
guilty,  i5fc.  Yea,  tho'  he  (hould  as  it  v  ere  infult  me,  and  fay 
He  knew  ali  this  before^  and  that  1  was  making  work  for  Repen- 
tance^ &c.  Tho'  what  I  faid  concerning  MxWhittelfey  was  only 
rpokcn  in  private,  to  a  Friend  or  two  ;  and  being  partly  over- 
heard, was  related  to  the  Rc<5lor,  and  by  h^m  extorted  from  my 

FiiCiids  ; 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 743.       g^ 

Ff  lends  ;  yet,  feeing  it  was  divufged  and  made  publick,  I  wat 
willing  to  confefs  my  Fault  therein  publickly.-— But  1  truft,God 
iviil  plead  my  Caufe.  * 

'[ThenextDay  he  went  to  Derby  ;  then  to5<j«/i(?^ar^,wherehc 
fpent  the  Sabbath  :  and  fpeaks  of  fome  fpiritual  Comfort  ;  but 
complains  much  of  Unfixednefs,  and  Wandrings  of  Mind  in 
Religion.] 

Monday,  ^ept,  19.  In  the  Afternoon, rode  to  Bethlehem^  and 
there  preached.  Had  fome  Meafure  of  Afriftance,both  inPrayer 
and  Preaching.  I  felt  ferious,  kind  and  tender  towards  allMan- 
kind,  and  longed  that  Holinefs  might  fluurifli  more  on  Earth. 


*  I  was  witnefs  to  the  veryChri{^ianSpiritMr.5r^;W(i  fhew'd 
at  that  Time,  being  then  at  New-Haven^   and  being  One 
that  he  faw  fit  to  confult  on  that  Occafion.     (This  was  the 
firftTime  that  ever  1  hadOpportunity  of  perfonalAcqualn- 
tance  with  him.)  There  truly  appeared  in  him  a  great  De- 
gree of  Calmnefs  and  Humility  ;    without  the  leafl  Ap- 
pearance of  Riling  of  Spirit  for  any  ill  Treatment  he  fup- 
pofed  he  had  fuitered,  or  the  leaft  Backwardnefs  to  abafe 
himfelf  before  Them  who  he  thought  had  wrong'd  him. 
What  he  did  was  without  any  Objecllon  or  Appearance  of 
Reludance,  even  in  private  to  his  Friends,  that  he  freely 
open'd  himfelf  to.     Earneit  Application  was  made  on  his 
Behalf  to  the  Authority  of  the  College,  that  he  might  have 
hisDegree  then  given  him  ;  and  particularly  by  theRev.Mr. 
Burr^  of  Newark^  one  of  the  Correfpondents  of  the  Hon. 
Society  in  Scctland  ;    He  being  fent   from  New-Jerfey  to 
New-Haven^  by  the  reft  of  thcCommifIioners,for  thatEnd  ; 
and  many  Arguments  were  ufed  5    but  without  Succefs. 
Indeed  the  Governours  of  the  College  were  fo  far  fatisfied 
with  the  Rcfledtions  Mr.  Brainerd  had  made  on  himfelf, 
that  they  appeared  willing  to  admit  him  again  into  College  ; 
but  not  to  give  him  VAsDegree^  'till  heftiould  have  remain'd 
there,  at  Jeaft  a  Twelve-Month,   which  being  contrary  to 
what  the  Correfpondents,  to  whom  he  was  now  engaged, 
bad  declared  to  be  their  Mind,   he  did  not  confent  to  it. 
He  deiired  bis  Degree,  as  he  thought  it  would  tend  to  his 
being  more  extenfively  ufeful ;  butftill  when  he  was  deny'd 
itj^,  he  manifeftcd  nQDifappointment  or  Refentment. 

M  2  Tuefd^y 


84     ^/.  2*^.  ^*^    LIFE 

Tuefday,  Sept.  20.  Had  Thoughts  of  going  forward  on  my 
Journey  to  my  Indians  -^  but  towards  Night  was  taken  with  a 
hard  Pain  in  my  Teeth,  and  fhivering  Cold,  and  could  not 
pofTibly  recover  a  comfortable  Degree  of  Warmth  the  whole 
Night  following.  I  continued  very  full  of  Pain  all  Night  ;  and 
in  the  Morning  had  a  very  hard  Fever,  and  Pains  almoft  all 
over  my  whole  Body.  I  had  a  Senfe  of  the  divine  Goodnefs  in 
appointing  this  to  be  the  Place  of  my  Sicknefs,  viz.  among  my 
Friends  that  were  very  Kind  to  me.  1  {hould  probably  have 
periflied,  if  I  had  firft  got  Home  to  my  own  Houfe  in  the  Wil- 
dernefs,  where  1  have  none  to  converfe  with  but  the  poor  rude 
ignorant  Indians.  Here  I  faw  was  Mercy  in  the  midft  of 
AfHi(5lion.  I  continued  thus,  moftly  confined  to  ray  Bed,  *till 
Friday-Night  ;  very  full  of  Pain  mod  of  the  Time  ;  but  thro* 
divine  Goodnefij  not  afraid  of  Death.  Then  the  extream  Folly 
ofthofe  appear'dto  me,  who  put  cfi"  their  turning  to  God  ^ill 
a  Sick-Bed.  Surely  this  is  not  a  Time  proper  to  prepare  for 
Eternity.—-  On  Friday-Evening  my  Pains  went  ofF  fomething 
fuddenly  ;  and  1  was  exceeding  weak,  and  almoft  fainted  ;  but 
was  very  comfortable  the  Night  following.  Thofe  Words 
PfaL  cxviii.17.  I  frequently  revolved  in  myMind  ;  and  thought 
we  were  to  prize  the  Continuation  of  Life  only  on  thisAccount, 
that  we  n^-^y  fkeiv  forth  God's  Goodnejs  and  Works  of  Grace. 

[P'rom  this  Time,  hegradually  recovered  :  And  on  the  next 
Tuefday  was  fo  well  as  to  be  able  to  go  forward  on  his  Journey 
Homewards :  But  was  'till  the  Tuefday  following  before  he 
reached  KaunaumesK  And  feems,  great  Part  of  this  Time,  to 
have  had  a  very  deep  and  lively  Senfe  of  the  Vanity  and  Empti- 
Ti^{s  of  all  Things  here  below,  and  of  the  Reality,  N{;arnefs  and 
vafl  Importance  of  eternal  Things.  ] 

Tuefday, 0/?^^^r  4.  ThisDay  rodeHome  to  my  ownHoufeand 
People.  The  poor  Indiav.s  2^pear*d  very  glad  of  my  Return. 
Found  my  Houfe  and  all  Things  in  Safety.  I  prefently  fell  on 
my  Knees  and  bleffed  God  for  lay  fafe  Return,  after  a  long  and 
tedious  Journey,  and  a  Seafon  of  Sicknefs  in  feveral  Places 
where  I  had  hpcr;,  and  after  I  had  been  fick  my  felf.  God  has 
irencwed  his  Kindnefs  tome,  in  preferving  me  onejourney  more. 
1  have  taken  many  confiderablc  Journeys  fince  this  Time  laft 
Year,  and  yet  God  has  never  fufFered  one  of  my  Bones  to  be 
broken,  or  any  diftrefling  Calamity  to  befall  me,  excepting  the 
ill  T'urn  I  had  in  my  laft  Tourney  ;  Tho'  I  have  bjen  often  ex- 
pefed  lo  Cold  and  Hunger  in  the  Wijderncfs,  where  th^  Com- 

foiC& 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.         A.D.  1 74^.    3^ 

forfs  of  Life  were  not  to  be  had  ;  have  frequently  been  loft  in 
the  Woods ;  and  fometimes  oblig'd  to  ride  mich  of  the  Night  ; 
and  once  lay  out  in  the  Woods  all  Night.  BlefL^d  beGod  thac 
has  preferved  me. 

[  In  his  Diary  for  the  next  eleven  Days,  are  great  Complain tt 
of  Diftaace  from  God,  fpiritual  Pride,  Corruption,  and  exceed- 
ing Vi'ehefs  He  once  fays,  hisHeart  was  fo  prefs'd  wiihaSenfe 
of  his  Pollution,  (hat  he  could  fcarcely  have  the  Face  and  Im- 
pudence (as  it  then  appeared  to  him)  to  defire  that  God  fhould 
not  damn  him  forever.  And  at  another  Time,  he  fays.  He  had 
fo  little  Senfe  of  God,  or  Apprehenfion  and  Relifh  of  his  Glory 
and  Excellency,  that  it  made  him  more  difpofed  to  Kindneft 
and  Tendernefs  towards  thofe  who  are  blind  and  ignorant  of 
God  and  Things  divine  and  heavenly.] 

Lord*s-Day,  OSiob.  16.  In  the  Evening,  God  was  pleafed  td 
give  me  a  feeling  Senfe  of  my  own  Unworthinefs  ;  but  thro'  di- 
vine Goodnefs  fuch  as  tended  to  draw,  rather  than  drive  me 
from  God  :  It  filPd  me  withSolemnity.  I  retired  alone  ('having 
at  this  Time  a  Friend  with  me)  and  poured  out  my  Soul  to 
God,  with  much  Freedom  5  and  yet  in  Anguifli,  to  find  my  felf 
fo  urifpeakably  finful  and  unworthy  before  a  holy  God.  Was 
now  much  refigned  under  God*s  Difpenfations  towards  me,tho' 
my  Trials  had  been  very  great.  But  thought  whether  I  could 
be  refign'd,  if  God  {hould  let  the  Frenchlndians  come  upon  me, 
and  deprive  me  of  my  Life,  or  carry  me  away  Captive  ( tho'  I 
knew  of  no  fpeciai  Reafon  then  to  propofe  this  Trial  to  myfelf, 
more  than  any  other)  and  mv  Soul  feem'd  fo  far  to  refl  and  ac- 
quiefce  in  God,  that  theSting  andTerror  of  thefeThings  feem'J 
in  a  great  Meafure  gone  .  Prefently  after  I  came  to  the  Indians ^ 
whom  I  was  teaching  to  fing  Pialm-Tunes  that  Evening,  1  re- 
ceived the  following  Letter  from  Stockbridge^  bv  a  MefTenger 
fent  on  the  Sibbath  on  Purpofe,  which  made  it  appear  of  greater 
Importance. 

*«  5/r,  Juftnowwe  received  Advices  from  Col.  Stoddard^ 
"  that  there  is  the  utmoft  Danger  of  a  Rupture  with  France* 
**  He  has  received  the  fame  from  his  Excellency  ourGovcrnour, 
"  ordering  him  to  give  Notice  to  ail  the  expofed  Places,  that 
^'  they  may  fecure  themfelves  the  beft  they  can  againfl:  any 
"  fudden  Invafion.  We  thought  beft  to  fend  di redly  to  Kau- 
««  naumeeky  that  you  may  take  the  prudenteft  Meafures  for  your 
«^  Safety  that  dwell  there.  i  am.  Sir,  ^c. 


S5    jEt.  26.  r^^  LIFE 

I  thought,  upon  reading  the  Contents,  it  came  in  a  goodSea- 
fon  ;  for  my  Heart  feem'd  fomething  fix'd  on  God,  and  there- 
fore I  was  not  much  furprized  :  But  this  News  only  made  mc 
more  ferious,  and  taught  me  that  I  muft  not  pleafc  my  felf  with 
any  of  the  Comforts  of  Life  which  I  had  been  preparing  for  my 
Support.  Blefled  be  God,  that  gave  me  any  Intenfenefs  and 
Fervency  this  Evening. 

Monday,  Odfob.  17.  Had  fome  rifing  Hopes  fometimcs,  that 
God  would  arife  and  have  Mercy  on 'Zlon  fpeedily.  My  Heart  is 
indeed  refrefhed,  when  1  have  any  prevailing  Hopes  of  Z/e«'s 
Profperity.  O  that  I  may  fee  the  glorious  Day,  when  Zion  fhall 
become  the  Joy  of  the  whole  Earth  !  Truly  there  is  nothing 
that  I  greatly  value  in  this  lower  World, 

[OnTuefday,he  rode  ioStockhridge  -,  complains  of  being  much 
diverted,  and  having  but  little  Life.  On  Wednefday,  he  ex- 
prefies  fome  folemn  Senfe  of  divine  Things,  and  a  longing  to 
be  always  doing  for  God  with  a  godly  Frame  of  Spirit.] 

Thurfday,  OSiob.  20.  Had  but  little  Senfe  of  divine  Things 
this  Day.  Alas,  that  fo  much  of  my  preciousTime  is  fpent  with 
fo  little  of  God  !  Thofe  are  tedious  Days,  wherein  1  have  ko 
Spirituality. 

Friday,  OSloh,  21.  Returned  home  to  Kaunaumeek  :  Was 
glad  to  get  alone  in  my  littleCotiage,and  to  cry  to  that  God  who 
Teeth  in  fecret  and  is  prefent  in  a  Wiidernefs. 

Saturday,  O^^i?^.  22.  Had  but  little  fenfibleCommunion  with 
God.  This  World  is  a  dark  Cloudy  Manfion.  Oh, when  will  the 
Sun  of  Righteoufnefs  fliineon  my  Soul  withoutCefTation  or  Inter- 
in  iifion. 

Lords- Day,  O£ioh.  23.  In  iheMorning,  bad  a  little  Dawn  of 
Comfort  arifing  fromHopes  of  feeing  gloriousDays  in  theChurch 
of  j3od  :  Was  enabled  to  pray  for  fuch  a  gloriousDay  with  fome 
Courage  and  Strength  of  Hope.  In  the  Forenoon,  treated  on 
the  Glories  of  Heaven,  i^c—  In  the  Afternoon,  on  theMiferies 
of  Hell,  and  the  Danger  of  going  there.  Had  fomeFreedom  and 
Warmth,  both  Parts  of  the  Day.  And  my  People  were  \tiy 
Attentive.  In  the  Evening,  two  or  three  came  to  me  under 
Concern  for  their  Souls;  to  whom  I  was  enabled  to  djfcourfe 
elofely,  and  with  fome  Earneftnefs  and  Dcfire.  O  that  God 
would  be  merciful  to  their  poor  Souls. 

.     [He 


of  Mr.  David  Bralnerd.      A  D.  1743.     %y 

[  He  feems,  through  the  whole  of  this  Week,  to  have  been 
greatly  engaged  to  fill  up  every  Inch  of  Time  in  the  Seivice  of 
God,  and  to  have  been  moft  dcligently  employed  inStudy,Prayer 
and  inftrudting  the  Indians  ;  and  from  Time  to  Time  exprefTes 
Longings  of  Soul  after  God,  and  the  Advancement  of  his  King- 
dom,and  fpiritual  Comfort  and  Refrclhment.] 

Lords- Day,  OSfoh.  30.  In  the  Morning,  enjoyed  fome  Fixed- 
nefs  of  Soul  in  Prayer,  which  was  indeed  fwect  and  defirable  : 
Was  enabled  to  leave  my  felf  with  God,  and  to  acquiefce  in  him. 
At  Noon,  my  Soul  was  refrefh'd  with  reading  Rev.  iii.  more 
cfpecially  the  nth  and  12th  Verfes.  O  my  Soul  longed  for 
that  blefled  Day,  when  I  fliould  dwell  in  the  Temple  ofGady  and 
^9  no  more  out  of  his  immediate  Prefence  ! 

Monday,  05iob,  31.  Rode  to  Kinderhook^  about  15  Miles 
from  my  Place.  While  riding,  I  felt  fome  divine  Sweetnefs  in 
the  Thoughts  of  being  a  Pillar  in  the  Temple  of  God  in  the  upper 
World,  and  being  no  more  deprived  of  his  ble/Ted  Prefence  and 
the  Senfe  of  his  Favour^  which  is  better  than  Life.  My  Soul 
was  fo  liftecTup  to  God,  that  I  could  pour  out  my  Defircs  to 
him,  for  more  Grace  and  furtherDegrees  of  SaniSlification,with 
abundant  Freedom.  Oh,  I  longed  to  be  more  abundantly  pre- 
pared for  that  BleiTednefs,  with  which  I  was  then  in  fome  Mea- 
fure  refrefh'd  ! —  Returned  Home  in  the  Evening  ;  but  took  aa 
extrcamly  bad  Cold  by  riding  in  the  Night. 

Tuefday,  Novemb.  I.  Was  very  much  difordcred  in  Body, 
and  fomerimes  full  of  Pain  in  my  Face  and  Teeth  :  Was  not 
able  to  ftudy  much,  and  had  not  much  fpiritual  Comfort.  Alas, 
when  God  is  withdrawn,  all  is  gone  I — Had  fome  fweetTho'ts,'* 
which  I  could  not  but  write  down,  on  the  Dffi^n,  Nature,  and 
End  of  Chrifiianily. 

Wednefday,  Novemb.  2.  Was  ftill  more  indifpofc^d  m  Body; 
and  in  much  Pain,  moft  of  the  Diy  :  Had  not  much  Comfort  ; 
was  fcarcely  able  to  ftudy  at  all  ;  and  ftill  intirely  alone  in  the 
Wildernefs.  But  bleftcd  be  the  Lord,  I  ben*t  cxpofed  in  the 
open  Aii»:  I  have  a  Houfe,  and  many  of  the  Comforts  of  Life, 
to  fupport  me.  I  have  learn'd,  in  a  Meafure,  that  a;!  good 
Things,  relating  both  to  Time  and  Eternity,  come  from  God.-- 
In  the  Evening,  had  fome  Degree  of  quickening  in  Prayer  :  I 
think,  God  gave  me  fome  Senfe  of  his  Prefence. 

Thurfday,  Novemb.  3.  Spent  this  Day  in  fecret  Faftiiig  and 
Prayer,  from  Morning 'till-Night.  Early  in  the  Morning,  bad 
(!  think)  fome  fmali  Degree  of  AfTiftance  iu   Prayer.     Aftsi- 

vvard^j 


g8     JEt.iS.  T^^LIFE 

wards,  read  the  Story  o^  Elijah  the  Prophet/i  ^/«^;,  xvli,  xviH;, 
andxix  Chapters,  and  alfo  2  Kings  ii.  and  iv.  Chapters.  My  'ooii. 
was  much  moved,  obferving  the  I'aith,  Zeal  and  Power  of  tna^ 
holy  Man  ;  how  he  wreftled  with  God  in  Prayer,  (sfc.  My  Soul 
fhen  cried  with  EliJJm,  IVhere  is  the  Lord  God  cfEVij^hl  Oh, 
I  longed  for  more  Faith  !  My  Soul  breathed  after  God,  and 
pleaded  with  him,  that  a  double  Portion  of  that  Spirit,  which  was 
given  to  Elijah,  might  re/i  on  me.  And  that  which  was  divinely 
refrefhing  2nd  (frengthning  to  my  Soul,  was,  I  faw  that  God  is 
ihtfame  that  he  was  in  the  Days  of  Elijah.  —  Was  enabled  to 
wreftic  with  God  by  Prayer,  in  a  more  afFe6lionate,  fervent, 
humble,  intenfe,  and  importunate  Manner,  than  I  have  far 
many  A4onihs  pall.  Nothing  feem'd  too  hard  for  God  to  per- 
form ;  nothing  too  great  for  me  to  hope  for  from  Him.—  I 
had  for  many  AJonths  intirely  loft  all  Hopes  of  being  made  in- 
ftrumental  of  doing  any  fpf  cial  Service  for  God  in  the  World  : 
It  has  appeared  intirely  impoffible,  that  one  fo  black  and  vile 
ihould  be  thus  improved  for  God  !  But  at  this  Time  God  was 
pleafed  to  revive  this  Hope.-— Afterwards  read  the  iiid  Chap,  of 
Excd'  and  on  to  the  xxrh,  and  faw  more  of  the  Glomf  &  Majefty 
of  God  difcovcrcd  in  thofe  Chapters,  than  ever  I  had  {ttn  be- 
fore ;  frequently  in  the  mean  Time  falling  on  my  Knees  and 
crying  to  God  for  the  Faith  of  Mofes,  and  for  a  Manifeftation 
of  the  divine  Glory.  Efpecially  the  iiid  &  ivth,  and  Part  of  the 
xivth&  xvth  Chapters,  were  unfpeakably  fweet  to  my  Soul :  My 
Soul  blefled  God,  that  he  had  fhewn  himfelf  fo  gracious  to  his 
Servants  of  old.  The  xvih  Chapter  feem*d  to  be  the  very  Lan- 
guage which  mySoul  utter'd  toGod  in  theSeafon  of  my  firft  fpiri- 
tual  Com  for  t,v/ lien  I  had  jufl  got  thro*  i\\QRedSea,hy2,  ^i?y  that 
I  had  no  Expectation  of.  O  how  my  Soul  then  rejoyced  in  God  / 
And  now  thofe  Things  came  freih  and  lively  to  ray  Mind  ;  now 
my  Soul  blefs'd  God  afrefh,  that  he  had  open'd  that  unthought 
of  fVay  to  deliver  me  from  the  Fearcf  the  Egyptians,  when  I  al- 
moftdefpair'dof  Lile.--- Afterwards  read  the  Story  of  Jbraham's 
Pilgrimage  in  the  Land  of  Canaan:  My  Soul  was  melted,  in 
obferving  his  Faith^  how  he  lean'd  on  God  ;  how  he  communed 
with  God,  and  v»hat  a  Stranger  he  was  here  in  the  World. 
After  that,  read  the  Story  of  Jofeph's  Sufierings,  and  God's 
Goodncfs  to  him  ;  BlefTed  God  for  ihefe  Examples  of  Faith  and 
Patience.  My  Soul  was  ardent  in  Prayer,  was  enabled  to 
Wfeftle  ardently  for  my  felf,  for  Chrif^ian  Friends,  and  for  the 
Church  of  God.  And  felt  more  Dciire  to  fee  the  Power  of 
iioU  in  the  Convcrfion  oi  Souls,  vhan  i  have  dgne  for  a  Jong 

Seafon. 


c/ ^fr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1743:     87 

Bcafon.  Blefled  be  God  for  this  Scafon  of  Fafting  and  Prayer. 
May  hIsGoodnefs  always  abide  with  mc%&  draw  mySoul  toHim.' 
Thurfday,  Novemk  4.  Rode  to  Kinderhook  ;  went  quite  to 
HuiforCs' River y  about  20  Miles  from  my  Houfe  ;  performed 
fome  Bufinefs  j  and  returned  Home  in  the  Evening  to  my  own 
Houfe.  I  had  rather  ride  hard,  and  fatigue  my  felf,  to  eet 
Home,  than  to  fpend  the  Evening  and  Night  amongft  thofe  that 
have  no  Regard  for  God. 

[The  two  next  Days,  he  was  very  ill  and  full  of  Pain,  proba- 
bly through  his  riding  in  theNight,  after  a  fatiguing  Day's  Jour- 
ney onThurfday  :  But  yet  fcems  to  have  been  diligent  inBufmefs.} 

Monday,  Novemb.  7.  This  Morning,  the  Lord  afforded  me 
fome  fpecial  Afliftance  in  Prayer  :  My  Mind  was  folemn, 
fix'd,  affeiStionate,  and  ardent  in  Defires  after  Holinefs ;  and 
ic\t  full  of  Tendernefs  and  Love  ;  and  my  Aitedtions  feemed  to 
be  diflblved  into  Kindnefs  and  Softnefs.--fn  the  Evening,  en- 
joyed the  fame  comfortableAffiftance  in  Prayer,  as  in  rheMorn- 
ing  :  My  Soul  longed  after  God,  and  cried  to  him  with  a  filial 
Freedom,  Reverence  and  Boldnefe.  O  that  I  might  be  intirely 
consecrated  and  devoted  to  God. 

[ThetV70  next  Days,  he  complains  of  bodily  Illnefs  &  Pain  j 
but  much  more  of  fpiritual  Barrennefs  and  Unprofitablenefs.j 

Thurfday,  Nov.  10.  Spent  this  Day  in  Fafting  and  Ptayer 
alone.  In  theMorning,was  very  dull  and  life'efs  j  was  fomething 
melancholy  and  difcouraged.  But  after  fome  Time,  reading 
2  Kings  xix  Chap,  my  Soul  was  moved  and  affe6led  ;  efpecially 
reading  Verfe  14.  and  onward.  I  faw  there  was  no  other  Way 
for  the  afflided  Children  of  God  to  take,  but  (o  go  to  God 
with  all  their  Sorrows.  Hezekiah,  in  his  great  Diftrefs,  went 
and  fpread  his  Complaint  before  the  Lord.  I  was  then  enabled 
to  fee  the  mighty  Power  of  God,  and  my  cxtreamNeed  of  that 
Power  :  Was  enabled  to  cry  to  God  affectionately  & /ardently  for 
his  divine  Power  and  Grace  to  be  exercifed  towards  m.e.— After- 
wards, read  the  Story  of  Dav^id's  Trials,  and  obferved  theCourfe 
he  took  under  them,  how  he  ftrengthncd  his  Hands  in  God  ; 
whereby  my  Soul  was  carried  out  after  Gcd,  enabled  to  cry 
to  Him  and  rely  upon  Him,  and  felt  JircTig  in  the  Lord.  Was 
afterwards  refrefli'd,  obferving  the  bkfl'cd  Temper  that  was 
wrought  in  David  by  his  Trials  :    All  Biiternefs  ard  Defire  of 

N  Reve^ngc 


90 


^/.25.  The  LIFE 


ine  in  my  fpiritual  Conflicts.     Was  a  little  refrefh'd  to  find  one 
with  whom  I  could  converfe  of  inward  Trials,  &c. 

Wednefday,  Decemb,  7.  Spent  the  Evening  in  Perplexity, 
with  a  Kind  of  guilty  Indolence.  When  I  have  no  Heart  or 
Refolution  for  God  and  the  Duties  intunribent  on  me,  1  feel 
guiltv  of  Negligence  and  MifimprovtmeHt  of  Time.  Certainly 
1  ought  to  be  engaged  in  my  Work  and  Bufmefs,  to  the  utmoft 
Extent  ot  my  Sfrength  and  Ability. 

Thurfday,  Decemb.  8.  Mv  Mind  was  much   diftradled  with 
difFerent  AfFeJions.   Seem'd  to  be  at  an  amazing  Diftance  from 
God  :  and  looking  round  in  the  World,  to  fee  if  there  was  not 
fome  Happinefs  to  be  derived  from  it^GoD,  and  fome  certain 
CbjeiSts  in  the  World,  feem*d  each  to  invite  my  Heart  and  Af- 
fections ;  and  my  Soul  feem*d  to  be  diftra£led  between  them, 
I  have  not  been  fo  much  befet  with  the  World  for  a  long  Time  ; 
and  that  withRelation  to  fome  particularObje6ls  which  I  thought 
my  felf  moft  dead   to.     But  even  while  I  was  defiring  to  pleafe 
my  felf  with  any  Thing   below.  Guilt,   Sorrow  and  Perplexity 
attended  the    firft  Motions  of  Defire.     Indeed  I  can't  fee  the 
Appearance  of  Pleafure  and  Happinefs  in  theWorld,  as  I  ufed  to 
do  :  And    blefled    be  God  for  any    Habitual   Deadnefa  to  the 
World.-  -  I  found  no  Peace,  orDeliverance  from  thisDiftra6tion 
and  Perplexity  of  Mind,  'till  I  found  Accefs  to  the  Throne  of 
Grace  :  And  as  foon  as  1  had  any  Senfe  of  God  and  Things  di- 
vine, the  Allurements  of  the  World  vanifh'd,  and  my  Heart  was 
determined  for  God.     But  my  Soul  mourned  over  my  Folly, 
that  I  fhould  defire  any  Pleafure,  but  only  in  God.  God  forgive 
my  fpiritual  Idolatry. 

[  The  next  thirteenDays,he  appears  to  have  been  continually 
in  deepConcern  about  the  Improvement  of  preciousTime  ;  and 
there  are  many  Expreffions  of  Grief,  that  he  improved  Time  no 
tetter  ;  fuch  as,OA,  what  Mifery  do  I  feel,  when  my  Thought  rove 
after  Canity  /  1  [houU  he  happy  if  always  tngagtd  for  God  !  O 
wretched  Man  that  I  am^  &c  I  Speaks  of  his  being  pained  with 
a  Senfe  of  hisBarrennefs,  perplexed  with  hisWandrings,  longing 
for  Deliverance  from  the  Being  of  Sin,  rnourning  that  Time 
pift  away,  and  (o  little  was  done  for  God,  i^^c.—-  On  Tuefday, 
Decemb.  20.  He  fpeaks  of  his  being  vifited  at  Kaunaumeek  by 
fjme  under  fpiritual  Concern.] 

Thurfday,  Decemb.  22.  Spent  this  Day  alone  in  Fafiing  and 
Prayer,  and  Reading  in  God's  Word  the  Exercifes  and  Deli- 
verances of  God*s  Children.  Had,  I  truft,  fome  Exercifc  of 
Faiib  and  realizing  Apprehenfion  of  divine  Power,   Grace  and 


^/ Mr.  David  Bralaerd.         A.D.1743.    ^r 

Holinefs  ;  and  alfoof  the  Unchangeablenefs  of  God,  that  he  is 
the  fame  as  he  was  when  he  delivered  his  Saints  of  old  out  of 
great  Tribulation.  My  Soul  was  fundry  Times  in  Prayer  en- 
larged for  God's  Church  andPeople.  O  that  Zion  might  become 
the  Joy  of  the  H^hole  Earth.  'Tis  better  to  wait  upon  God  with 
Patience,  than  to  put  Confidence  in  any  Thing  *in  this  lower 
World.  My  Souly  wait  Thou  on  the  Lord  ;  for  from  him  comes 
thy  Salvation, 

Friday,  Decemb,  23.  Felt  a  little  more  Courage  and  Refolu- 
tion  in  Religion,  than  at  fonae  other  Times. 

Saturday,  Decemb.  24.  Had  fome  Ailiftance,  and  longing 
Dellres  after  Sanillfication*,  in  Prayer  thieDay  ;  erpeci^lly  in  the 
Evening  :  Was  fenfible  of  my  own  Weaknefs  and  fp'rUnal  [m- 
potency  :  Saw  plainly,!  (hould  fall  into  Sin,  if  God  of  hi  •  h^un-  ^ 
dant  Mercy  did  not  uphold  my  Soui,  and  withold  mi  fro.^  Evil, 
O  that  God  would  uphold  me  by  hii  free  Spirit y  and  fave  me  from 
the  Hour  of  Temptation. 

LordVDay,  Decemb,  25.  Pray'd  much,  in  theMorning,with 
a  feeling  Senfeof  my  own  fpiritual  Weaknefs  and  InfufEcicncy 
for  any  Duty.  God  gave  me  forae  Affiftancc  in  Preaching  to 
the  Indians  ;  and  efpecially  in  the  Afternoon,  when  I  was  ena- 
bled to  fpeak  with  uncommon  Plainnefs,  Freedom,  and  Ear- 
neftnefs.  BlefTed  be  God  for  any  Affiftance  granted  to  one  (o 
unworthy.  Afterwards  felt  fome  Thankfulnefs  ;  but  fiill  fen- 
fible of  Barrennefs.—  Spent  fome  Time  in  the  Evening,  with 
one  or  twoPerfons  under  fpiritual  Concern, and  exhorting  others 
to  their  Duty,  bfc, 

Monday,  Decemb.  26.  Rode  down  to  Siockbrid^e.  Was  very 
much  fatigued  with  my  Journey,  wherein  I  underwent  great 
Kardfhip  :  Was  much  expofed  and  very  v/et  by  falling  into  a 
River.  Spent  the  Day  and  Evening  without  much  Senfe  of 
divine  and  heavenly  Things  ;  But  felt  guilty,  griev'd,  and  per- 
plcx'd  with  wandring  carelefs  Thoughts. 

Tuefday,  Decemb,  27.  Had  a  fmall  Degree  of  Warmth  m 
fecret  Prayer,  in  the  Evening  :  but,  alas,  had  but  little  fpiritual 
Life,  and  confequently  but  littleComfort  I  Oh,  thePrefTurc  of  a 
Body  of  Death  !  * 

Wedncfday,  Decemb,  28.  Rode  about  fix  Miles  to  the  Ordi- 
nation of  Mr.  Hopkins,     In  the  Seafon  of  the  Solemnity  was 


*  This  Day  he  wrote  the  td Letter  added  at  the  End  cf  this 

Hiltdry, 

fomewhst 


^2     jEt.  1^.  Tbi   LIFE  A.D.1744; 

• 
fomewhat  afFe£led  with  a  Senfc  of  theGreafnefs  and  fmportance 
of  the  Work  of  a  Minifter  of  Chrift.  Afterwards  was  grieved 
to  fee  the  Vanity  of  the  Multitude.  In  the  Evening,  fpcnt  a 
iittle  Time  with  fome  Chnflian  Friends,  with  fome  Degree  of 
Satisfadtion  j  but  moft  of  the  Time  had  rather  have  been  alone. 
Tnurfday,  Dtcemb.  29.  Spent  the  Day  mail, !y  in  converfihg 
v.'ith  Friends  j  yet  enjoyed  little  Satisfadlion,  bccaufe  I  ccuid 
n\d  but  fewdifpofed  to  Converfe  of  divine  and  heavenly  Things. 
Alas,  what  are  Things  of  this  World,  to  afford  Satisfadlion  to 
ihe  Soul  !-—  Near  Night,  returned  to  Stockbridge  ;  in  fecret 
blefs'd  God  for  Retirement,  and  that  I  ben't  always  expofed 
to  theCompany  and  Converfation  of  ttie  World.  O  that  I  could 
Jive  in  the  Jecret  of  God's  Prcfence* 

Friday,  Decemb.  30.  Was  in  a  folemn  devout  Frame  in  the 
Evening.  Wonder'd  that  Earth,  with  all  its  Charms,  fhould 
ever  allure  me  in  the  leaft  Degree.  O  that  I  could  always  realize 
Che  Being  and  Holinefs  of  God. 

Saturday,  Z)^ivw^.  31.  Rode  from  Stccktridge  home  to  my 
Houfe  :  The  Air  was  clear  and  Calm, but  as  Cold  as  ever  I  felt 
it  in  the  World,  or  near.  I  was  in  great  Danger  of  perifhmg 
by  the  Extremity  of  the  Seafon.— -  Was  enabled  to  Meditate 
much  on  the  Road. 

Lord's- Day,  Jarrjary  i.  1743,4.  In  the  Morning,  had  fome 
fmali  Degree  of  AiTift^nce  in  Prayer.  Saw  my  felf  fo  vile  and 
unv/orthy,  that  I  could  not  look  my  People  in  the  Face,  when 
J  cam»to  Preach.  Oh,  my  Meanncfs,  Folly,  Ignorance,  and 
inward  Pollution  !---Iii  the  Evening.,  had  a  iittle  Affiftance  :a 
Praver,fo  that  thcDaiy  was  delightfome, rather  then  burdenfom. 
ivefle6led  on  the  Gocdnef?  of  God  to  me  in  the  paft  Year,  dffr. 
Of  a  Truth  God  has  been  kind  and  gracious  to  me,  tho*  he  has 
caufed  ine  to  pafs  thro'  many  Sorrows  ;  he  has  provided  for  me 
bomuifully,  fo  that  1  have  been  enabled,  in  about  15  Months 
paft,  to  bf  [low  to  charicablcUfes  about  an  Hundred  Pounds  New- 
£hgland  Money,  ih^t  I  can  now  remember.  *  Bleflcd  be  the 


*  Which  was,  J  fuppofe,  to  the  value  of  about  one  Hundred 
end  eighty  five  Founds  in  our  Bills  of  the  olJ  Tenour,  as 
they  now  pafs.---  By  this,  as  well  as  many  other  Thing:;, 
it  is  manifcft,  that  his  frequent  Melancho'y  did  not  arife 
from  the  Confideration  of  any  Difadvanta  re  he  was  laid 
under  to  get  a  Living  io  the  World^by  his  Lxpulfion  from 
the  College,  r     , 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 744.       9  j 

Lord,  that  has  fo  far  ufed  me  as  h'n  Steward^  to  diftributc  a  Par- 
tion  of  his  Goods.  May  I  always  remember,  that  all  I  have  comes 
from  God.  BlelTed  be  the  Lord,  that  has  carried  me  thro'  all 
the  Toils,  Fatigues,  and  Hardfhips  of  the  Year  paft,  as  well  as 
the  fpiritual  Sorrows  and  Conflifls  that  have  attended  if.  O  that 
I  could  begin  this  Year  with  God,  and  friend  the  whole  of  it  to 
his  Glory^  either  in  Life  or  Death.        '  ' 

Monday,  Jan.  2.  Had  fome  affecting  Senfeof  my  own  Im- 
potency  and  fpiritual  Weaknefs.— -  'Tis  nothing  but  the  Power 
of  God  that  if^eeps  me  from  all  Manner  of  Wickednefs.  I  fee, 
I  am  nothings  end  can  do  nothing  without  Help  from  above. 
Oh,  for  divine  Grace  \  In  the  Evening,  had  fome  Ardour  of 
Soul  in  Prayer,  and  longing  Defires  to  have  God  for  my  Guide 
and  Safe-guard  at  all  Times,  f 

Tuefday,  Jan.  3..    V/as  employed  much  of  theDay  inWrit- 
ing  ;  and  i*pcnt  foaie  Time  in  other  ncccfiary  Employment. 
But  my  Time  pafles  away  fo  fwiftly,  that  I  am  aftonifhed  v/hen 
I  refle-flon  it,  and  fee  how  little  I  do  in  it.   My  State  of  Solitude 
does  not  make  the  Hours  bang  heavy  upon  my  Hinds.  O  what 
Reafon  of  Thankfulnefs  have  I,  on  account  of  this  Retirement  ! 
I  find,    that  1  donU^   and  it  feems  I  can^t^  lead  a  Chri/lian  Life, 
when  I  am  abroad,  and   can't  fpend  Time  in  Devotion,  Chrif- 
tian  Converfation,  and  SeriousMeditation,as  Ifhould  do.  Tiiofe 
Weeks    that  I  am  obliged  now  to  be  from  heme,  in   order  to 
learn  the/^^V^^Tongue,  are  moftly  fpent  inPerplexity  &  Barren- 
nefs, without  much  AveerRelifb  of  divir.eThings  ;  and  I  feel  ray 
felf  a  Stranger  at  theThrone  of  Grace. for  want  of  more  frequent 
and  continued   Retirement.     Whe^j  I  return  Home,  and  giMQ 
my  felf  to  Meditation,  Prayer,  and  Faffing,  a  new  Scene  opens 
to  my  Mind,  and  my  Soul  longs  for  Mortiftcation,  Self- (tenia!. 
Humility,  and   Divorcement  from  all  the  Things  of  the  ^Vcrld. 
This   Evening,  my  Heart  was  fomewhat  warm  and  fervent  in 
Prayer  and  Meditation, fo  that  I  was  loth  to  indulge  Si-ep.  Con- 
tinued in  thofe  Duties  'fill  shout  Midnight. 

Wednefday,  Jan.  4.  Was  in  a  reiijrned  and  mortififd  Temper 
of  Mind,  much  of  the  D\y,  Time  appeared  a  Moment^  Life  a 
Vapour^  and  ail  its  Enjoyments  as  empty  Bubbles,  and  fleeting 
Blalfsof  Wind. 


f   I'hi?  D.iy  hr  wrote  fhe  3V  UUer^  publifhed  at  the  End  of 
.    shis  Accoun:  of  his  Lilc. 

Thurfjav, 


94   .^t.i6.  ri^  LIFE 

Thurfday,  Jan  5.  Had  a  humbling  and  prcifing  Senfe  of  my 
Unworthinefs.  My  Senfe  of  the  Badncfs  of  my  own  Heart  filled 
my  Soul  with  Bi tier nefs  and  Anguifli ;  which  was  ready  to  fink, 
as  under  the  Weight  of  a  heavy  Burden.  And  thus  fpent  the 
Evening,  'till  late.— Was  fomewhat  intenfe  and  ardent  inPrayer. 

Friday,  Jan*  6.  Feeling  and  confidering  my  extreamWeak- 
nefb,  and  Want  of  Grace,  the  Pollution  of  my  Soul,  andDanger 
of  Temptations  on  every  fide,  I  fet  apart  this  Day  for  Fafting 
andPrayer, neither  eating  nor  drinking  fromEvening  toEvening, 
befeeching  God  to  have  Mercy  on  me.  And  my  Soul  intenfely 
long'd,  that  the  dreadful  Spots  and  Stains  of  Sin  might  be  wafti'd 
away  from  it.  Saw  fomething  of  the  Power  and  Alfufficiency  of 
God.  My  Soul  feem'd  to  reft  on  his  Power  andGrace ;  longed 
for  Refignation  to  his  Will, and  Mortification  to  all  Things  here 
below.  My  Mind  v/as  greatly  fix'd  on  divine  Things  :  My 
.Refolutions  for  a  Life  of  Mortification,  continual  Watchful- 
nefs,  Self-denial,  S>  rioufnefs,  and  Devotion  to  God, were  ftrong 
and  fix'd  ;  my  Defires  ardent  and  Intenfe  ;  my  Confcience 
tender, and  afraid  of  every  Appearance  of  Evil.  My  Soul  grieved 
with  the  Reflection  on  paft  Levity,  and  Want  of  Refolution  for 
God.  I  folemnly  renewed  my  Dedication  of  my  felf  to  God, 
and  longed  for  Grace  to  enable  me  always  to  keep  Covenant 
v/ith  him.  Time  appeared  very  fhort.  Eternity  near  ;  and  a 
great  Name,  either  in  or  after  Life,  together  with  all  earthly 
Pleafures  and  Profits,  but  an  empty  Bubble,  a  deluding  Dream. 

Saturday,  Jan.  7.  Spent  this  Day  in  Serioufnefs,  with  fted- 
faft  ReK:»lutions  for  God  and  a  Life  of  Mortification.  Studied 
clofcly,  *till  I  felt  my  bodily  Strength  fail.  Felt  fome  Degree  of 
Refignation  to  God,  with  an  Acquiefcence  in  hisDifpenfations. 
Was  grieved,  that  I  could  do  fo  little  for  God  before  my  bodily 
Strength  faiTd.---  In  the  Evening,  tho'  tired,  yet  was  enabled  to 
continue  inftant  in  Prayer  for  fome  Time.  Spent  the  Time  in 
Reading,  Meditation,  and  Prayer,  'till  the  Evening  was  far 
fpent  :  vVas  grieved, to  think  that  I  could  not  watch  unto  Prayer 
t!je  whole  Night.--  But  bleffeii  be  God,  Heaven  is  a  Place  of 
contii  ual  a;)d  inceffant  Devotion,  tho'  Earth  is  dull. 

[The  fix  Days  following,  he  continued  in  the  fame  happy 
PVi;rne  of  Mind  ;  enjoyed  the  fame  Compofure,Calmnefs,  Re- 
%nauon,  ardent  Dcfire  and  fweet  Fervency  of  Spirit,  in  a  high 
Degree,  every  Day,  not  one  excepted.  Thurfday,  this  Wcek> 
be  kept  23  s  Day  of  fccret  Falling  and  Prayer.] 


^? 


aturca 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd*      h  .D.  1 744.     95 

Saturday,  Jan.  14,     This  Morning,  enjoyed  a  moft  folemn 

Seafon  in  Prayer  :   My  Soul  feem'd  enlarged  and  a/Tiftcd  to  pour 

out  it  felf  to  God  for  Grace,  and  for  every  Bleflingl  wanted, 

for  my  {€ii^  my  dear  Chriftian  Friends,  and  for  the  Church  of 

God  ;  and  was  fo  enabled  to    fee  him  who  u  inviftble^  that  tnv 

Soul  rejied  upon  him  for  the  Performance  of  every  Thing  I  afked 

agreable  to  his  Will.     It  was  then  my  Happinefs,    to  continue 

inftant  in  Prayer^  and  was  enabled  to  continue  in  it  for  near  an 

Hour.     My  Soul  was  thenjirong  in  the  Lord  and  in  the  Power  of 

his  Might :  Long'd  exceedingly  for  angelick  Holinefs  and  Purity, 

^nd  to  have  all  my  Thoughts,  at  all  Times,  employed  in  divine 

and  heavenly  Things.  O  how  blefTed  is  an  heavenly  Temper  I 

O  how  unfpeakably  blefled  it  is,  to  feel  a  Meafure  of  that  ReiSli- 

tede,  in  which  we  were  at  firft  created  !-—  Felt  the  fame  divine 

Afliftance  in  Prayer  fundry  Times  in  the  Day.     My  Soul  cch- 

fided  in  God  for  m^  felf,  and  for   his  Xion  ;   trufied  in  divine 

Power  and   Grace,  that  he  would  do  glorious  Things   m  his 

Churchj  on  £arth,  for  his  own  Glory. 

[  The  next  Day  he  fpeaks  of  fome  Glimpfes  he  had  of  the  di- 
vine Glories, and  of  his  being  enabled  to  maintain  his  Refoluiions 
in  feme  Meafure  ;  but  complains,  that  he  could  not  draw  ne^c 
toGod  :  Seems  to  be  fili'd  with  tremblingFears  left  he  fliouid  re- 
turn to  a  Life  of  Vanity,  to  pleafe  himfelf  with  feme  of  ths 
Enjoyments  of  this  lower  World  j  and  fpeaks  of  his  being  much 
troubled,  and  feeling  guilty,  that  he  (hould  addrefs  immortal 
Souls  with  no  more  Ardency  and  Defire  of  their  Salvation. 
Monday,  he  rods  down  to  SiscUridgc,  was  diftrefs'd  v/ith"i 
extream  Cold  :  But  notwithftanding,  his  Mind  was  in  a  dcvo 
and  folemn  Frame  in  his  Journey.  The  four  next  Day?,  he 
was  very  ill,  probably  by  his  fufrering  from  the  Cold  in  hh  Jc'ur- 
ney  ;  yet  he  iays  he  ipent  the  Time  in  a  more  folemn  Manner 
than  he  fear'd.  On  Friday  Evening,  he  rode  down  and  vifired 
Mr.  Hopkins  I  and  on  Saturday,  rode  i8  Miles  to 5<?//^«r>, where 
he  kept  Sabbath,  and  enjoyed  confiderable  Degrees  of  God's 
gracious  Prefence.,Affiftance  in  Duty,  and  divine  Comfort  ard 
Refrelhmentj  longing  to  give  himfelf  wholly  to  God,  to  bs 
hfs  forever.] 

Monday,  Jan.  23.  I  think  I  never  felt  more  refigned  to 
God,  nor  io  much  dead  to  theWorld,  in  every  Refpf;cV,asn£»W ; 
Was  dead  to  all  Ddire  of  Reputation  and  Greatnefs,  either  in 
Life  or  afterDeath  :  All  I  longed  for,  was  to  be  holy,  htynble, 
cmcifisd  to  the  World  ^;. 

O  Tuefcay, 


96    ^/.  26.  Tk  LIFE 

"  Tuefday,  Jan,  24.  Near  Noon,  rode  over  toCanaan.  In  the 
Evening,  was  unexpe£ledly  vifited  by  a  confiderable  Number  of 
People,  with  whom  I  was  enabled  to  converfe  profitably  of  di- 
vineThings:  Took  Pains  to  defcribe  the  DifFerence  between  a 
I'egular  and  irreguIar5^//^-/(?z;^  :  The  one  confifting  with  aSupream 
Love  to  God,  but  the  othernot  ;  The  former  uniting  God's 
Glory  and  the  Soul's  Happinefs,  that  they  become  one  common 
Intereft,  but  the  latter  disjoyningand  feparating  God's  Glory 
and  the  Man's  Happinefs,  feeking  the  latter  with  a  Negledl  of 
the  former.  Illuftrated  this  by  that  genuine  Love  that  is  found 
betwf  en  theSexes ;  which  is  diverfe  from  that  which  is  wrought 
up  towards  a  Perfon  only  by  rational  Arguments,  or  Hope  of 
Self-Intereft.  Love  is  a  pleafingPaflioHjit  afFordsPleafure  to  the 
Mind  where  it  is  ;  but  yet  true  genuine  Love  is  not  nor  can  be 
placed  upon  any  Obje6l  with  that  Defign  of  pleafmg  itfelf  with 
the  feeling  of  it  in  a  Man's  own  Breaft. 

[  On  Wednefday,  he  rode  to  Hhcff^JA  ;  the  next  Day.,  to 
Stockbridge  :  And  on  Saturday,  home  to  Kaunaumeek^  tho'  the 
Feafon  was  Cold  and  Stormy  :  Which  Journey  was  followed 
with  lilnefs  and  Pain.  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  he  fpent 
the  Time, while  riding,  in  profitable  Meditations,  and  in  lifting 
up  his  Heart  to  God  ;  and  he  fpeaks  of  Affiftance,  Comfort, 
and  Rtfrefliment ;  but  f^ill  complains  ofBarrennefs,  ^c.  His 
Diary  for  the  five  next  Days  is  full  of  the  mofl  heavy  bitterCom- 
plaints  ;  and  he  expreiTes  himfelf  as  full  of  Shame  ^nd  Self-loath- 
ing for  his  lifelefs Temper  of  Mind  andSluggifhnefs  of  Spirit,  and 
asteing  in  Perplexity  and  Extremity,  and  appearing  to  himfelf 
unfpeakably  vile  and  guilty  before  God  on  Account  of  fome  in- 
ward workings  ofCorruption  he  found  in  his  Heart,  ^^.] 

Thurfday,  Feb,  2.  Spent  this  Day  in  Fading  and  Prayer, 
feeking  the  Pr efence  ^nd  AfTiftance  of  God,  that  he  would.ena- 
b'e  me  to  overcome  all  my  Corruptions  and  fpirituai  Enemies. 

Fiiday,  Feb.  3.  Enjoy'd  more  Freedom  and  Comfort  than 
nf  late  ;  was  intenfely  engaged  in  Meditation  upon  the  different 
Vv^hifpers  of  the  variousPowers  andAfFedions  of  a  pious  Mind, 
t:-:ercifcd  with  a  greatvaricty  ofDifpenfations:  And  could  not  but 
Wiite  35  well  as  meditate  on  To  entertaining  aSubje6t.  *  1  hope. 


;  find  what  he  wrote  on  this  Head  amons;  his  Paper?,  that 
were  left  in  my  H?.nd,  and  it  i;;  here  pubhilicd  at  ihcEndof 
this  Account  of  hia  Life. 


c/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1744.    ^57 

the  Lord  gave  me  fome  true  Senfe  of  divine  Things  this  Day  : 
But  alas,  how  great  and  preffing  are  the  Remains  of  indwelling 
Corruption  !  I  am  now  more  fenfible  than  ever,  that  God  alone 
is  the  Author  and  Fimjher  of  our  Faith  \  i.  e.  that  the  whole  and 
every  Part  of  Sanguification,  and  every  good  Word,  Work, or 
Thought,  that  is  found  in  me,  is  the  Effect  of  his  Power  and 
Grace  ;  that  without  him  1  can  do  ISioihing^  in  the  fln'deft 
Senfe  ;  and  that  ke  worh  in  us  to  will  and  to  do  of  hii  ciun  pcod 
Pleafure^  and  from  no  other  Motive.  Ob,  how  amazing  it  is 
that  People  can  talk  fo  much  about  Men*sPower  and  Goodnefs ; 
when,  if  God  did  not  hold  us  back  every  Moment,  v/e  fhould 
be  Devils  incarnate !  This  my  bitter  Experience,  for  feveral 
Days  laft  paft,  has  abundantly  taught  me  concerning  my  kU, 

Saturday,  Feb.  4.  Enjoy'd  fome  Degree  of  Freedom  snd 
fpiritualRefrefliment ;  was  enabled  to  pray  v/iih  fomeFervency, 
and  longing  Defires  of  Xion^s  Profperity  ;  and  my  Faith  and 
Hope  feems  to  iah  hold  of  God^  for  the  Performance  of  what  f 
was  enabled  to  plead  for.  San6lification  in  my  k]f^  and  the  In- 
gathering of  God's  Eled,  was  all  my  Defire  -,  and  the  Hope  of 
its  Accomplifhment,  all  my  ^oy. 

Lords-Day,  Feb.  5.  VVas  enabled  in  fome  Meafure  to  reft 
and  confide  in  God,  and  to  prize  his  Prefence  and  fomeGlimpfes 
of  the  Light  of  his  Countenance,  above  my  neceffary  Food. 
Thought  my  felf,  after  the  Seafon  of  Weaknefs,  Temptation, 
and  DefertionI  endured  the  laft  Week,  to  be  fcmewhat  like 
Samfon  when  his  Locks  began  to  grow  again.  Was  enabled  to 
preach  to  my  People  with  more  Life  and  Warmth,  than  I  have 
for  fome  Weeks  paft. 

Monday,  Feb.  6.  This  Morning, my  Sou]  again  was  ftrengfh- 
ned  in  God,  and  found  fom.e  fweet  Repofe  in  him  in  Prayer  : 
Longing  efpecially  for  the  complcai  Mortification  of  Senfualitv 
and  Pfidej  and  for  Refignation  to  God*s  Difpenfaujns,  at  ail 
Times,  as  thro'  Grace  1  felt  it  at  this  Time.  I  did  not  defire 
Deliverance  from  any  Difficulty,  that  attends  my  Circurnftsn- 
ces,  unlefs  God  was  willing.  O  how  ccmfortiible  is  this  Tcm- 
ppr  |...  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  reading  God's  Word,  iw 
Writing,  and  Prayer.  Enjoyed  repeated  and  frequent  Comfort, 
and  Inienfenefs  of  SoftI  in  P-ayer  thro'  the  Day.  In  the  Even- 
ing, f^^ent  fome  Hours  in  private  Converfation  with  my  People  ; 
^nd  afterwards,  felt  fome  Warmth  in  fecret  Prayer. 

Tuefday,  Feb.  7.  Was  much  engaged  in  fome  fweet  Medi- 
tations on  the  Powers  and  •Aff'eiSiionsoLthe  godly  Soul  in  thei;- 
Puifijit  of  their  belovedObjea  :  WroteTomelhing  of  the  nutr.e 

O  2  Language 


9^     AY  26.  T^^LIFE 

Language  of  fplritual  Senfation,  in  its  foft  and  tender  Whifpers  5 
declaring,  that  it  now  feels  and  ta/ies  that  the  Lord  is  gracious  5 
that  he  is  the  Supreme  Good,  the  onlySoui-fatisfying  Happincfs  ; 
that  he  is  a  Compleat,  Sufficient, and  Almighty  Portion  :  faying, 
«'  If^horn  have  I  in  Heaven  but  Thee  ?  And  there  is  none  upon 
<«  Earth  that  1  defire^beftdes  this  blefled  Portion.  O,  I  /eel  'tis 
<«  Heaven  to  ple^fe  him,  and  to  be  juft  what  he  would  have  me 
<«  10  be  !  O  that  my  Soul  were  Holy^  as  heisHoly  !  O  that  it 
<«  were  pure  even  as  Chrijl  is  pure  ;  and  pe^feSi^  as  my  Father  in 
*<  Heaven  is  perfe6f  I  Thefe,  I  feel,aie  the  fweeteft  Commands 
*'  in  God's  Book,  comprifiLg  ell  others.  And  fliall  I  break 
*«  them  »  Muft  I  break  'em  !  Am  I  under  a  Neceflity  of  it  as 
<«  Icn;^  as  I  live  in  the  World  !  O  mySoul,  Wo,  Wo  is  me  that 
<«  I  am  a  Sinner, becaufe  i  now  neceflarily  grieve  and  offend  this 
*«  blefTed  God,  who  is  infinite  in  Goodnefs  and  Grace  !  Oh, 
'-«  methinks,  if  he  would  p  unifh  me  for  my  Sins,  it  would  not 
««  wound  myFIeart  fo  deep  to  offend  him  :  But  tho'  I  fm  con- 
'«  tinually,  yet  he  continually  repeats  hisKindnefs  to  me  !  Oh, 
««  Methinks  I  ccuid  bear  any  fuffering  ;  but  how  can  I  bear  to 
<<  grieve  and  d;fhonour  this  blefTed  God  !  How  fhall  I  yield 
<•'  ten  Thoufand  7'imes  more  Honour  to  him  ?  What  fhall  I 
*'  do  to  glGrify  &:  worfbip  this  beft  of  Beings  ?  O  that  I  could 
''  coiiiecrate  my  fclf,  Soul  and  Body,  to  his  Service  forever.  O 
»^«  that!  could  give  up  my  felf  to  him  fo  as  never  more  to  attempt 
*'  to  be  my  own,  or  to  have  any  Will  or  AfFe<5lions  that  are 
«'  not  perfeiSliy  confoi  med  to  him.  But,  ala:,alas,l  find  I  can't 
<«  be  thus  entirely  devoted  to  God  :  I  can't  live  and  not  fin. 
*«  O  yi  Angels,  do  ye  glorify  him  incefTantly  ;  and  if  poffible, 
«-'  priflrateyouifelves  lower  before  the  blefled  King  of  Heaven. 
♦'  I  long  to  bear  a  Part  v.'ith  you  ;  and,  if  it  were  poffible,  to 
*'  help  you.  Oh,  when  we  have  done  all  that  we  can,  to  all 
'^  Esernicy,  we  (liall  not  be  able  to  oiFer  the  ten  Thoufandth 
^*    Part  of  the  Homage  that  the  glorious  God  deferves  !" 

Felt  fomethin^  fpiritua),  devout,  refigned,  and  mortified  to 
the  World,  much  of  the  Day  ;  and  efpecially  towards  aad  in 
ihe  Evening.  BitiTcd  be  God,  that  he  enables  me  to  Icve  him 
for  himfeif. 

Vv  edneii'j) ,  Feb.  8.  Was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  of  Soul, 
jnofi  of  iheDay  ;  tho'  fenfible  of  and  ref^lefs  under  fpiritu?.]  Bas- 
lennets.  i  find  that  both  Mind  andBody  are  quickly  ti.~ed  with 
intcnfcnefs  and  Fervour  in  theThin^s  of  God.  O  that  I  toiild 
txas  incc'T^!;:  ar^  An^^ih  m  DcvoLion  and  fplritual  fcjvour. 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.D.  1 744.     9^ 

:  Thurfr^ay,  Feb.  9,  Obferved  this  Day  as  aDay  of  Fafting  and 
prayer,  intreating  of  God  to  beftow  upon  me  his  Blefling  and 
Grace  ;  efpecially  to  enable  me  to  live  a  Life  of  Moriification 
to  the  World, as  well  as  of  Refignation  and  Patience.  Enjoy'd 
fome  realizing  Senfe  of  divine  Power  and  Goodnefs  in  Prayer, 
leveral  Times  ;  and  was  enabled  to  roll  the  Burden  of  my  felf 
and  Friends, and  of  Ziotiy  upon  theGoodnefs  andGrace  of  God  : 
But,  in  the  general,  was  more  dry  and  barren  than  I  have  ufually 
been  of  late  upon  fuch  Occafions. 

Friday,  Feb.  10.  Was  exceedingly  opprefs'd,  moft  of  the 
Day, withShame, Grief  and  Fear, under  a  Senfe  of  my  paftFolly, 
as  well  as  prefent  Barrennefs  and  Coldnefs.  When  God  fetr.  be- 
fore me  my  paft  Mifcondudl,  efpecially  any  Inftances  of  mi/guid- 
ed Zeal,  it  (inks  my  Soul  into  Shame  and  Confufion,  makes  me 
afraid  of  a  fhaking  Leaf.  My  Fear  is  fuch  as  the  ProphetJ^r^f- 
my  complains  of,  ^er.  xx.  10.-—  I  have  no  Confidence  to  bold 
up  my  Face,  even  before  my  Fellow- Worms  ;  but  only  when 
my  Soul  confides  in  God, and  I  find  the  fweetTemper  of  Chrift, 
the  Spirrt  of  Humility,  Solemnity,  and  Mortification,  and  Re- 
fignation, alive  in  my  Soul.—  But,  in  the  Evening,  was  unex- 
peiSiedly  refrefh'd  in  pouring  out  my  Complaint  to  God  :  MyShame 
and  Fear  was  turned  into  a  fweet  Compofure  and  Acquiefcence 
in  God. 

Saturday,  Feb.  11.  Felt  much  as  Ycderday  :  enjoyed  but 
little  (enfible  Communion  with  God. 

Lords-Day,  Feb.  12.  My  Soul  feem*.d  to  confide  in  God, and 
to  repofe  itfelf  on  him  ;  .and  had  out-goings  of  Soul  after  God  in 
Prayer.  Enjoyed  fome  divine  Aififtance,  in  the  Forenoon,  \a 
Preaching  ;  but  in  the  Afternoon,  was  more  perplex'd  with 
Shame  bV.  Afterwajr's, found  fomeReiief  inPrayer  :  Lov'd,  as 
a  feeble  afflidted  defpifedCre3ture,to  caft  myfelf  onaGod  of  infi- 
r.ice  Grace  andGoodnefs, hoping  for  noHappinefs  but  from  him. 
Monday,  Feb.  13.  Was  Calm  andSedate  in  Morning-Devo- 
tions ;  and  my  Soul  feem*d  to  rely  on  God.—  Rode  to  Stock- 
bridge^  and  enjoyed  fome  comfortable  M^editations  by  theWay  : 
Had  a  more  refrefhing  Tafte  and  Relifh  of  heavenly  BleiTednefs, 
than  I  have  enjoy'd  for  many  Months  paft.  1  have  m-anyTimes, 
of  late,  felt  as  ardent  Defires  of  Holinefs  as  ever  :  ^\it  not  fo 
much  Senfe  of  the  Sweetnefs  and  uafpeakable  Pleafare  of  theEn- 
.joyments  and  Employments  of  Heaven.  My  Soul  longed  to 
jcave  Earth,  and  bear  a  Part  with  Angeis  in  their  celeltial  £m- 
pioyments.  My  Soul  faid,  L')rd,  it  is  good  to  be  here  ;  and  it 
r;- scared  to  me  better  to  die,  than  to  lofe  the  Relifli  of  th^fe 
;....:- !v  Delights,  [-^ 


1  GO 


JEt.iS,  The   LIFE 


[  A  Senfe  of  divineThings  feem'd  to  continue  with  him,ina 
JefierDegree,thro'thenextDay.  OnWednefday  he  was,by  fome 
Difcoud'e  that  he  heard, caft  into  a  melancholyGloom, that  ope- 
rated much  in  the  fameManner  as  hisMelancholy  had  formeriy 
done,  when  he  came  firft  ioKaunaumeek  ;  TheEfFe(Els  of  which 
feem'd  to  continue  ,in  fjme  Degree  the  fix  following  Days.] 

Wednefday,  Feb.  22.  In  the  Morning,  had  as  clear  a  Senfe 
of  the  exceeding  Pollutionof  my  Nature, as  ever  I  remember  to 
have  had  in  my  Life.  I  then  appeared  to  my  felf  inexprefTibly 
loathfom,  &  defiled  :  Sins  of  Childhood,  of  early  Youth, and  fuch 
Follies  as  1  had  not  thought  of  for  Years  together,  (as  I  remem- 
ber) came  now  frefli  to  my  View,  as  if  committed  but  Yefter- 
day,  and  appeared  in  the  moft  odious  Colours :  They  appeared 
more  in  Number  than  the  Hairs  of  my  Head  :  Yea,  they  went 
ever  my  Head  as  an  heavy  Burden,—-  In  the  Evening,  the  Hand 
of  Faith  feem'd  to  be  Ihengthen'd  in  God  :  My  Soul  feemed 
10  reft  and  acquiefce  in  him  :  Was  fupported  under  myBurdens, 
reading  the  cxxv.  Pfalni :  Found  that  it  was  fvveet  and  co^iifor- 
tab!e  to  lean  on  God. 

Thurfday,  Feb,  23.  Was  frequent  in  Prayer,  and  enjoyed 
fome  Affiilance.—  There  is  a  God  in  Heaven^  that  over-rules  all 
Things  for  the  beft  ;  and  this  is  theComfort  of  my  Soul  :  1  had 
fainted^  unUjs  1  hsd  believed  to  fee  the  Goodnejs  of  God  in  the  Land 
cfthe  Livings  notwiihftanding  prefent  Sorrows.—  In  the  Even- 
ing, enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in  Prayer,  for  my  felf,  Friends,  and 
the  Church  of  God. 

Friday,  Feb,  24.  Was  exceeding  refflefs  and  perplexM  under 
a  Sciife  of  the  IVIiiiniprovement  of  Time  ;  Mourn'd  to  feeTime 
pafs  away  ;  Felt  in  the  greatefl  Hurry  ;  feem'd  to  have  every 
'i^hing  to  do  :  Yet  could  do  Nothing, but  only  grieve  and  groan 
under  my  Ignorance,  Unprofitiiblene(s,  Meannefs,  the  Foolifh- 
refs  of  my  Adtions  and  Thoughts,  the  Pride  and  Bitternefs  of 
my  paft  Frames  (at  fome  Times,at  IcaftJ  all  which  at  thisTime 
appeared  to  me  in  lively  Colours,  and  fill'd  me  with  Shame.  I 
could  not  compofe  my  Mind  to  any  profitable  Studies,  by  Rea- 
fon  of  this  Prelfurc.  '  And  the  Reafon,  I  judge,  why  I  am  not 
allowed  to  Study,  a  great  Part  of  my  Time,  is,  becaufe  lam 
endeavouring  to  lay  in  fuch  aSiock  ofKnowledge,  as  fliall  be  4 
Sclf-Sulncicncy.---  I  know  it  to  be  my  indifpcnfable  Duty  to 
Study,  arjd  qualify  my  felf  \\\  the  befl  Manner  1  caw  for  publick 
."■■cfvice;  But  this  is  rny  Miferv,  I  naturally  Study  and  prepare, 
:'.<r  f  vx^x  c'.njume  it  upon  my  Lu/ls  of  Pride  andSdf- Confidence. 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.        A.D.  1 744:    lor 

[  He  CGntlriued  in  much  the  fame  Frame  ofUneafinefs  at  the 
Mifimprovement  of  Time,  and  PrefTure  of  Spirit  under  a  Senfe 
of  Vilenefs,  Unprofitablenefs  ^f.  for  the  fix  next  following 
Days ;  excepting  fome  Intervals  of  Calmnefs  and  Compofure, 
in  Refignation  to  and  Confidence  in  God.] 

Friday,  March  2.  Was  moft  of  the  Day  employed  in  Writ- 
ing on  a  divine  Subje£l.  Was  frequent  in  Prayer,  and  enjoy'd 
fome  fmall  Degree  of  Affiftance.  But  in  the  Evening,  God  was 
pleafed  to  grant  me  a  divine  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer  ;  efpecially  in 
the  Duty  of  Interceilion.  f  think,  I  never  felt  fo  much  Kind- 
nefs  and  Love  to  thofe  who  I  have  Reafon  to  think  are  my 
Enemies  (tho*  at  that  Time  I  found  fuch  a  iDifpofition  to  think 
the  beft  of  all,  that  I  fcarce  knew  how  to  think  that  any  fuch 
Thing  as  Enmity  and  Hatred  lodg'd  in  afiy  Soul  ;  it  feem'd  as 
if  all  the  World  muft  needs  be  Friends)  and  never  pray'd  with 
more  Freedom  and  Delight,  for  my  felf,  or  deareft  Friend,  than 
I  did  now  for  my  Enemies. 

Saturday,  March  3.  In  the  Morning,  fpent  ( I  believe  )  an 
Hour  in  Prayer,  with  great  Intenfenefs  and  Freedom,  and  with 
the  mofl  foft  and  tender  Affed-ion  towards  Mankind.  I  longed 
that  thofe  who  I  have  Reafon  to  think  owe  me  111- Will,  might 
be  eternally  happy:  It  feem'drefrefhing,to  think  of  meeting  tHcm 
inHeaven,how  much  foever  they  had  injured  me  onEarth  ;  Had 
noDifpofition  to  infiit  upon  anyConfeiTion  from  them, in  order  to 
Reconciliation  &  theExercife  ofLove  ^Kindnefs  to  them.  O'tis 
anEmblem  of  Heaven  it  felf,  to  love  all  the  World  with  a  Love 
of  Kindnefs,  Forgivenefs,  and  Benevolence  ;  To  feel  our  Soula 
fedate,  mild  and  meek  ;  to  be  void  of  all  evil  Surmifings  and 
Sufpicions,  and  fcarce  able  to  think  Evil  of  any  Man  upon  anv 
Occafion  ;  To  find  ourHearts  fimple,  open,  and  free,  to  thole 
that  look  upon  us  v/ith  a  different  Eye  !-—  Prayer  was  fo  fvvect 
an  Exercife  to  me,  that  I  knew  not  how  to  ceafe,  h^l  fhould 
lofe  the  Spirit  of  Prayer.  Felt  no  Difpcfition  to  eat  or  drink, 
for  the  fake  of  the  Pleafure  of  it,  but  only  to  fupport  my  Na- 
ture, and  fit  me  for  divine  Service.  Could  not  be  content 
without  a  very  particular  mention  of  a  great  Number  of  dear 
Friends  at  the  Throne  of  Grace  -,  as  alfo  the  particularCircum- 
ftances  of  many,  fo  far   as  they  were  krrown. 

Lords-Day,  Nov.  4.  In  the  Morning,  enjoyed  the  fame  In- 
tciifenefs  in  Prayer  as  Yei^erday- Morning  ;  iho'  not  info  prea: 
.1  Degree  :    Fek  the  fame  Spirit  of  Love,univcrfal  Benevolence, 

rgivenefs, Humility, Refignation,  Mcnificaticn  to  theVv'or/J, 
,     ;  r,^,7-, n-.fufe  of  Mcnd^as  then.   My  Soul  rtfcd  hi  God  \  2nd 

1 


I02     JEt.26.  IheX^lVE 

I  found,  I  wanted  no  cthcrRefuge  or  Friend,  While  my  Soul 
thus  trufts  in  God,  all  Things  feem  to  be  at  Peace  with  me, 
even  the  Stones  of  the  Earth  :  But  when  I  can't  apprehend  and 
confide  in  God,  all  Things  appear  with  a  diifferent  Afpeft, 

[Through  the  four  next  Days,  he  complains  of  Barrennefs, 
want  of  holy  Confidence  in  God,  Stupidity,  Wandrings  of 
Mind,  ^c.  and  fpeaks  of  Oppreffion  of  Mind  under  a  Senfe  of 
exceed ingMeannefs,  paft  Follies,  as  well  as  prefent  Workings  of 
Corruption.—  On  Friday,  he  feems  to  have  been  reftored  to  a 
confiderableDegree  of  the  fame  excellentFrame  that  he  enjoyed 
the  Saturday  before/] 

Saturday,  March  lo.  In  the  Morning,  felt  exceeding  dead 
to  the  World  and  all  its  Enjoyments  :  I  thought,  1  was  ready 
?nd  willing  to  give  upLifeand  all  its  Comforts,  as  foon  as  called 
to  it  :  And  yet  then  had  as  muchComfortof  Life  as  almoft  ever 
I  had.  Life  itfelf  now  appeared  but  an  empty  Bubble  :  The 
Riches,  Honoars,  and  coramonEnjoymenis  of  Life  appeared  ex- 
tremely taftlefs.  I  longed  to  be  perpetually  and  entirely  crucified 
tt^  all  Things  here  below,  by  the  Croji  cf  Chri/i.  My  Soul  was 
fweetly  rcfigned  toGod's  Difpofal  of  me,  in  every  Regard  j  andl 
fivv, there  had  nothing  happened  to  me  but  what  was  belt  for  me. 
)  confided  in  God,  that  he  would  never  leave  me y  tho'  I  fhould 
tuaik  thro'  the.  Valley  of  the  Shadow  of  Death.  It  was  then  my 
Meat  and  Drink  to  be  holy,  to  live  to  the  Lord,  and  die  to  the 
Lord:  And  I  thought,  that  I  then  enjoyed  fuch  a  Heaven,  as 
far  exceeded  the  moft  fublime  Conceptions  of  an  unregenerate 
Soul  ;  and  even  unfpeakably  beyond  what  I  my  felf  could  con- 
ceive of  at  another  Time.  ,1  did  not  wonder,  that  Peter  faid. 
Lord, it  is  gocd  to  be  ^frf,when  thus  rcfrefh'd  with  divineGlorier. 
My  Soul  was  full  of  Love  and  Tendernefs  in  the  Duty  of  Inter- 
cefiion  ;  efpecially  felt  a  moft  fweet  Affe6tion  to  fome  precious 
oodly  Minifters,  of  my  Acquaintance.  Pray'd  earneftly  for 
<iear  Chrifiians,  and  for  thofe  I  have  Reafon  to  fear  are  myEne- 
mies :  And  cou'd  not  have  fooken  a  Word  of  Bitternefs,  or 
entertained-?,  oitterThougbf,  a^ainft  the  vileft Man  living.  Had 
a  icnfe  of  my  ov/n  great  Unworthinefs.  My  Soul  feem'd  to 
breath  forth  Love  and  Praife  to  God  afrefli,  when  1  thought  he 
would  let  his  Children  love  and  receive  me  as  one  of  their  Bre- 
thren andFcllow- Citizens  :  And  when  I  thought  of  their  treat- 
ing mc  in  that  Manner,  I  longed  to  \\q  at  theirFeet  j  and  ro'ild 
think  o[no\Vay  to  cxprcfjdH-Sir.ceiiiy  ^^implic't;.  cf  myLovv'. 


cf  Mr.  David  Bralnerd.    A.D.  1 744.    \  oj 

and  Efteem  of  them,  as  being  much  better  than  my  felf.—  To- 
wards Night,  was  very  forrowful :  Seem'd  to  my  felf  the  worft 
Creature  living  ;  and  could  not  pray,  nor  meditate,  nor  think 
of  holding  up  my  Face  before  theWorld. — Was  a  little  relieved 
in  Prayer,  in  the  Evening  ;  but  longed  to  get  on  my  Knees 
and  alk  Forgivenefs  of  every  Body  that  ever  had  feen  any  Thing 
amifs  in  my  paft  Condu<a,efpecially  in  my  religiousZeai—W^ 
afterwards  much  perplex'd,  fo  that  I  could  not  Sleep  quietly. 

Lords-Day,  March  11.  My  Soul  was  in  fome  Meafure 
y?rtf»^/^/»Vz«GoD,inMorning-Devotion;  (o  that  I  was  released 
from  trembling  Fear  and  Diftrefs.--  Preached  to  my  People 
from  the  Parable  of  the  Sower^  Matth.  xiii.  And  ei^oyed  fome 
Afliftance,  both  Parts  of  the  Day  :  Had  fome  Freedom,  Affec- 
tion, and  Fervency  in  addrefling  my  poor  People  ;  long'd  thflt 
God  fhould  take  hold  of  their  Hearts,and  make  them  fpiri'tually 
alive.  And  indeed  I  had  fo  much  to  fay  to  them,  that  I  knew 
not  how  to  leave  off  fpeaking.  * 

Monday,  March  12.  In  the  Morning,  was  in  a  devout,  ten- 
der, and  loving  Frame  of  Mind  ;  and  was  enabled  to  cry  ta 
God,  I  hope,  with  a  Child-like  Spirit,  with  Importunity,  and 
Refignation,  and  Compofure  of  Mind.  My  Spirit  was  full  df 
Quietnefs,  and  Love  toMankind  ;  and  longed  thatPeace  (houli 
reign  on  theEarth  :  Was  grieved  at  the  very  Thoughts  of  a/^ry, 
engry  and  intemperate  Xeal  in  Religion  5  mourn'd  over  paft 
Follies  in  thatRegard  ;  and  mySoul  confided  inGod  foiStrengtfe 
and  Grace  fufficient  for  my  future  Work  and  Trials.—  Spent 
the  Day  mainly  in  hard  Labour,  making  Preparation  for  my 
intended  Journey. 

Tuefday,  March  13.  Felt  my  Soul  going  forth  after  God 
fometimcs  ;  but  not  with  fuch  Ardency  as  I  longed  for.  In  the 
Evening,  was  enabled  to  continue  hjiant  in  Prayer^  for  fome 
confiderable  Time  together  ;  and  efpecially  had  refped  to  the 
Journey  I  defigned  to  enter  upon,  with  the  Leave  of  divine 
Providence,  on  the  Morrow.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedcm  and  Fer- 
vency, intreating  that  the  divine  Prefence  might  attend  me  in 


*  This  was  the  lafl  Sabbath  that  ever  he  performed  publick 
Service  at  KaunaumeeJ^, and  thefe  the  laft  Sermans  that  evef 
he  preached  there.  It  appears  by  his  Diary,  that  while  he 
continued  with  thefe  Indians^  he  took  great  Pains  with 
them, and  did  it  with  much  Difcretion  5  But  the  particufer 
MaruJer,  how;  has  been  omitted  for  Brevity's  Sake. 

P  c^'^y 


104     ^t.i6.  ne  LIFE 

^v^ry  Place  where  my  Bufinefs  might  lead  me  ;  and  had  a  par- 
ticular Reference  to  the  Trials  and  Temptations  that  I  appre- 
hended I  might  be  more  eminently  expofed  to  in  particular 
Places*  Was  ftrengthenM  and  comforted  ;  altho*  I  was  before 
very  weary.     Truly  the  Joy  of  the  Lord  is  Strength  and  Life, 

Wednefd&Yf  March  i^*  Enjoy'd  fome  Intenfenefs  of  Soul 
in  Prayer,  repeating  my  Petitions  for  God's  Prefence  in  every 
Place  where  I  expedted  to  be  in  my  Journey.  Befought  theLord 
that  I  might  not  be  too  much  pleafed  and  amufed  with  dear 
Friends  and  Acquaintance,  in  onePlace  and  another.—  Near  lo 
fct  out  on  my  Journey,  and  near  Night  came  to  Stockbridge. 

Thurfday,  Marth  15.  Rode  down  to  Sheffield,  Here  \  met 
a  Meflenger  from  Eaji- Hampton  on  Long-lfland  ;  who,  by  the 
unanimous  Vote  of  that  large  Town,  was  fent  to  invite  me  thi- 
ther,in  order  to  fettle  with  that  PeopIe,where  I  had  been  before 
frequently  invited.  Seem'd  more  ataLofs  what  was  my  Duty, 
than  before  ;  when  I  heard  of  the  greatDifficulties  ot  thatPlace, 
I  was  much  conterned  and  grieved,  and  felt  fome  Dtfires  to 
comply  with  their  Requeft  ;  but  knew  not  what  to  do  :  En- 
deavourecj  to  commit  the  Cafe  to  God. 

[  The  two  nextDaySjhe  went  no  further  ih^inSalifburyy  being 
much  hinder'd  by  the  Rain.  When  he  came  there,  he  was 
much  indifpofed.--  He  fpeaks  of  comfortable  and  profitable 
Converfation  with  Cbriftian  Friends,  on  thefe  Days.j 

Lord's-Day,  M^rch  iS,  [  At  Saiiftury^  1  Was  exceeding 
weak  and  fainr,  fo  that  I  could  fcarce  walk  :  But  God  was  pleaf- 
ed to  afford  me  much  Freedom,  Clearnefs  and  Fervency  in 
f*reachiiig  :  I  have  not  had  the  like  AfTiftance  in  Preaching  to 
Sinners  for  many  Months  paft.  —- Here  another  Meflenger  met 
ine,  and  informed  me  of  the  Vote  of  another  Congregation,  to 
give  me  an  Invitation  to  come  among  them  upon  Probation  for 
Settlement.  *  Was  fcmething  exercifed  in  Mind  with  a  Weight 
and  Burden  of  Care.  O  that  God  would  fsnd  forth  faithful 
Labourers  into  his  tiarveji, 

^  ['  After  this,  he  went  forward  on  his  Journey  towards  l<!ew- 
xork  ^T\dNe'w-ye*fey  :  fn  which  he  proceeded  flowly  j  perform- 
ing his  Journey  under  great  Degrees  of   bodily   indifpofttion. 


*  This  Congregation  was  that  at  Millington,  near  Ha^dam* 
They  were  very  earnestly  defirgus  of  his  com-ng  among 
them.  Hew- 


i?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.    A.D.  1744;     5©^ 

However,  he  preach'd  feveral  Times  by  the  Way,  being  urged 
by  Friends ;  in  which  he  had  confiderable  Affiftance.  He 
fpeaks  of  Comfort  in  Converfation  with  Chriftian  Friends,  from 
Time  to  Time,  and  of  various  Things  in  the  Exercifes  and 
Frames  of  his  Heart,  that  ihew  much  of  a  divine  Iniluence  on 
his  Mind  in  this  Journey  :  But  yctc  omplains  of  the  Thing  that 
hefear^d^  viz.  z  Decline  of  his  fpiritual  Life,  or  Vivacity  in 
ReJigion,  by  Means  of  his  conftant  Removal  from  Place  to 
Place,  and  want  of  Retirement ;  and  complains  bitterly  of  his 
Ujnworthinefs,  Deadnefs,  ^c—  He  came  to  New-Tork  on 
Wednefday,  March  28.  And  to  Elizabeth-Town  on  the  Satur- 
day following,  where  itfeems  he  waited  'till  the  CommiFioncrs 
came  together.] 

Thurfday,  yipril  5.  Was  again  much  exercifed  with  Weak- 
fiefs,  and  with  Pain  in  my  Head.  Attended  on  theCommifTio- 
ners  in  their  Meeting.  *  Refolved  to  go  onflill  with  the  Indian 
AfFair,  if  divine  Providence  permitted  ;  altho'  I  had  before  felt 
fome  Inclination  to  go  to  E aft- Hampton y  where  I  was  /blicited 
to  go.  t 

[  After  this,  he  continued  two  or  three  Days  in  (he  Jerpys^ 
very  111  ;  and  then  returned  to  New-York  ;  and  from  thence  into 
New- England  3  and  went  tohisnativeTown  of  Haddam  :  where 

hs 


*  The  Indians  at  Kaunaumeek  being  but  few  inNumber,anc? 
Mr.  5rfl;«^r^  having  now  been  labouring  among  them  about 
a  Year,  and  having  prevailed  upon  them  to  be  willing  to 
leave  Kaunaumeek^  and  remove  to  Stockbridge,  to  live  con- 
ftantly  undctMr.Sargeani*sM\n'iQ.ry  ;  he  thought  he  might 
now  do  more  Service  for  Chrift  among  the  Indians  elfe- 
where  :  And  therefore  went  this  Journey  to  New-jerfey 
to  lay  the  Matter  before  the  Commiifioners ;  who  met  at 
Elizabeth-Town,  on  this  Occafion,  and  determined  that 
he  fhould  forthwith  leave  Kaunaumeek ,  and  go  to  the  £>«- 
hware  Indians, 

^  By  the  Invitations  Mr.  Brainerd  had  lately  received,  it 
appears,  that  it  was  not  from  NecefHty,or  for  want  of  Op- 
portunities to  fettle  in  the  Miniftry  amongft  the  Engli/hy 
notwithflanding  theDifgrace  he  had  been  laid  under  atC;?/- 
legey  that  he  was  determined  to  forfake  all  the  outward 
Comforts. to  be  enjoyed  in  the  EngtiJJ)  Settleraoits,  to  go 
and  rpend  his  Life  among  the  brutilh  Savagesy  and  endure 
P  2  the 


To6      Mt.  26.  TJ^  L  I  F  E 

he  arrived  on  Saturday,  jlprtl  14,—  And  he  cojitinHes  ftill  his 
bitter  Complaints  of  want  of  Retirement.  While  he  was  in 
ISleW'Tork^  he  fays  thus,  <«  OA,  Uh  not  the  PUaJurei  of  the 
«'  World  can  Comfort  me  !  If  God  deny  his  PrefencCy  what  are 
*«  the  Plea  fur  es  of  the  City  to  me  f  One  Hour  of  five  et  Retire- 
««  ment  where  God  is,  is  better  than  the  whole  fForld/*  And  he 
continues  to  cry  out  of  his  Ignorance,  Meannefs,  and  Unwor- 
thinefs.  However,  he  fpeaks  of  fome  Seafons  of  fpecial  Aflifl- 
ance  and  divine  Sweetnefs.— He  fpent  fome  Days  among  his 
Friends  at  Ea/i- Hampton  and  Millmgton.'] 

Tuefclay,  Jpril  ij.  Rode  to  Millington  again  ;  and  felt 
perplcx'd  when  I  fct  out ;  Was  feeble  in  Body»  and  weak  in 
r'aith.  I  v/as  going  to  preach  a  Le<Sture  ;  and  fearM  I  fhould 
never  have  Affiftance  enough  to  get  thro*.  But  contriving  to 
ride  alone,  at  a  Diftance  from  the  Company  that  was  going,  I 
fpent  the  Time  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God  :  Had  not  gon« 
far  before  niySoul  was  abundantlyflrengthen'd  withthofcWordSj 


the  Difficulties  and  Self-denials  of  an  Indian  Miffion.     He 
had,  j lift  as  he  was  leaving  Kaunaumeek^  had  an  earnefl  In- 
vitation to  a  Settlement  2^1  EaJ}- Hampton  oxxLong-Jfland^xho. 
faireft  pleafantefl  Town  on  the  whole  lHand^and  one  of  its 
largeft  and  moft  wealthy  Parifhes.  The  People  there  were 
unanimous  in  their  Defires  to  have  him  for  their  Paftor, 
and  for  a  long  Time   continued  in   an  earneft  Purfuit  of 
what  they  dc/ired,  and  were  hardly  brought  to  relinquifli 
thcirEndcavours  and  give  up  theirHopes  of  obtainijig  him. 
Befides  thelnvitation  he  had  ioMillington  ;  which  was  near 
his  native  'Fovvn,  and  in  the  midft  of  his  Friends.     Nor 
did  Mr.  Bralnerd  chufe  the  Bufmefs  of  a  Miiljonary  to  the 
Indians,  rather  than  accept  of  thofe  Invitations,  becaufe  he 
wasunaccjuainted  with  the  Difficulties  andSufrerings  which 
attended  fucb  aService  ;  for  he  had  hadExperience  of  thefe 
D.filculties  in  Summer  and  Winter  j  having  fpent  about  a 
"l\velve- Month  in  a  lonely  Oefert  among  thefe   Savages, 
v.'hcre  he   had  pone  through  extream  Hardfhlps,  and  beea 
theviubjcdt  of  aTrain  of  outward  and  inwardSorrows, which 
were  now  frefh  in  his  Mind.     Notwithftanding  all  thefe 
Thin<^^n,    he  rhofa  (iUl  to  go  on  with   this  Bufmefs ;  and 
that  alfho'  the    Plate  he  was  now  going  to,  was  at  a  ftill 
mw'.h  greater  Diftance  from  moft  of  his  Friends,  Acquain- 
tanrc*,  r^rid   natrve    I.nr.u, 

// 


V 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd     A.D.  1 744.       107 

if  God  be  for  us,  who  can  he  again/i  us  ?  I  went  on,  confiding 
jn  God  ;  and  fearing  nothing  fo  much  as  Self-Confidence.  In 
this  Frame  I  went  to  the  Houfe  of  God,  and  enjoyed  fome 
Affiftance.  Afterwards  felt  the  Spirit  of  Love  and  Meeknefs  in 
Converfation  with  fome  Friends.  Then  rode  Home  to  my 
Brother's  :  And  in  the  Evening,  finging  Hymns  with  Friends, 
my  Soul  feemM  to  melt  :  And  in  Prayer  afterwards, enjoyed  the 
Exercife  of  Faith ^Tin^  was  enabled  to  be  ferixent  inSpirit :  Found 
more  of  God's  Prefence,  than  I  have  done  any  Time  in  my  late 
wearifom  Journey.  Eternity  appeared  very  near  :  My  Nature 
was  very  weak,  and  feem'd  ready  to  be  difTolved  :  The  Sun 
declining,  and  the  Shadows  of  the  Evening  drawjng  on  apace. 
O I  long'd  to  fill  up  the  remaining  Moments  all  forGod  !  Tho* 
my  Body  wasfo  feeble,  and  wearied  with  Preaching,  and  much 
private  Converfation,  yet  I  wanted  to  fit  up  all  Night  to  do 
fomething  for  God.  To  God,  the  Giver  of  thefe  P^efrefhrnents, 
be  Glory  forever  and  ever  ;  Amen. 

Wednefday,  v^pr// 18.  Was  very  weak,  and  enjoyed  but 
little  fpiritualComfort.  Was  exercifed  withOne  cavilling  againli: 
Original  Sin,  May  the  Lord  open  his  Eyes  to  fee  the  Fountain 
of  Sin  in  himfelf. 

[  After  thi»,  he  vifitad  feveral  Miniflers  in  ConneSficut  ;  and 
then  travelled  towards  Kaunaumeek,  and  came  to  Mr.  Sargeam's 
at  Stockbridge,  Thurfday,  Jpri/ 26.  He  performed  this  Journey 
in  a  very  weak  State  of  Body.  The  Tfiings  he  fpeaks  of'. -in 
the  meanTime,  appertaining  to  the  Frames  and  Exercifes  ol^j^fe 
Mind, are  at  fome  Times  Deadnefs  anda  being  void  of  ^jn^l 
Comfort,  at  other  Times  refting  in  God,  fpiritual  Sweetnft  in 
Converfation,  Engagednefs  in  Meditation,  on  the  Road,  A/fifl- 
ance  in  Preaching,  Rejoycing  to  thinlc  that  fo  much  more  of 
his  Work  was  done,  and  hefo  much  nearer  to  the  eternal  World. 
And  he  once  and  again  fpeaks  of  a  Senfe  of  great  Ignorance, 
fpiritual  Pollution  &c.] 

Friday  a«d  Saturday,  Jpri/  27,  and  28.  Spent  fome  Time 
in  vifiting  Friends,  and  difcourfmg  with  my  People  (who  were 
now  moved  down  from  their  own  Place  to'Mr.Sargeant's)  and 
found  them  very  glad  to  fee  me  returned.  Was  Exercis'd  in  my 
Mind  wii]^  a  Senfe  of  my  own  Unworthinefs. 

Lord*i,-Day,  Jprii  29,     Preach'd  for  Mr.SargeaniyhothFarts  , 
of  the  Day,  from  Rev,  xiv.  4^    JEnjoyed   fome  Freedom  in- 
Preaching,  tho'   not  much  Spirituality.     In    the  Evening,  my 
Heart  was  in  fomtf Mi  ifurc  iiftied  up  in  Thankfulnefs  to  God 
for  any  Affitt%nce. 

Mondaji 


:.o     JEU^^,  ^i^  LIFE 

Monday,  J^pr'il  30.  Rode  to Kaunaumed, hut  was  extrcamly 
111 :  Did  not  enjoy  the  Comfort  I  hoped  for  in  my  own  Houfe. 

Tuefday,  May  i.  Having  received  new  Orders  to  go  to  a 
Number  of  Indians  on  Delaware  Ri\rer  in  Penfylvania^  and  my 
People  here  being  moftly  removed  to  Mr.  SergeanVsy  I  this  Day 
took  all  my  Cloaths,  Books,  ^c,  and  difpofed  of  them,  and  fet 
out  for  Delaware  River :  But  made  it  my  Way  to  return  toMr. 
Sargeant's  :  Which  I  did  this  Day,  juft  at  Night.  Rodefeveral 
Hours  in  the  Rain  thro'  the  howling  Wildernefs,  altho'  I  was 
fo  difordered  in  Body,  that  little  or  nothing  but  Blood  came 
from  me. 

[  He  continued  at  StocHridge ^the  next  Day  ;  and  on  Thurf- 
day  rode  a  little  Way,  to  Sheffield^  under  a  great  Degree  of 
Illnefs ;  but  with  Encouragement  andChearfulnefs  of  Mind  un- 
der his  Fatigues.  On  Friday,  he  rode  to  Salijbury^  and  con- 
tinued th^-re  'till  after  the  Sabbath.  He  fpeaks  of  hisSours  being, 
feme  Part  of  this  Time,  refrefti'd  in  Converfation  with  fome 
Chriftian  Friends,  about  their  heavenly  Home  and  their  Journey 
thither.  At  other  Times,  he  fpeaks  of  himfelf  as  exceedingly 
perplexed  with  Barrennefs  and  Deadnefs,  and  has  this  Exclama- 
tion, Oh^  that  Time  P)ould  pafs  with  fo  little  done  for  God  /—On 
Monday,  he  rode  to  Sharon  ;  and  fpeaks  of  himfelf  as  diftrefs'd 
at  the  Confideration  of  the  Mifimprovement  of  Time.] 

Tuefday,  Aloy  8.  Set  out  from  Sharon  in  Conne^icut^  and 
travelled  about  45  Miles  to  a  Place  called  the  Fijh-Kily  f  and 
lodg*d  there.  Spent  much  of  my  Time, while  riding, in  Prayer, 
thtt  God  would  go  with  me  to  Delaware.  My  Heart  fometimes 
was*ready  to  fink  with  the  Thoughts  of  my  Work,  and  going 
alone  in  the  Wildernefs,  I  knew  not  where  :  But  flill  it  was 
comrortable,to  think,  that  others  of  God*sChildren  had  wander^ 
ed  about  in  Caves  and  Dens  of  the  Earth  ;  and  Abraham^  when 
h£  was  called  to  go  forth,  went  out  not  knowing  whither  he  went* 
O  that  I  might  follow  after  God. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  went  forward  on  his  Jourqey  ;  crofs'd 
Hudfon's  River,  and  went  to  Gofl)en  in  the  Highlands  ;  and  fo 
travelled  a-crofs  the  Woods,  fromHud/on*$  River  to  Delaware, 
about  an  loo  Miles,  through  a  defolate  and  hideous  Country, 
above  New-Jerfcy  ;  where  were  very  fewSettlemcnts  :  In  which 
Journey  he  fufFered  much  Fatigue  and  Hardfhip.     He  vifued 


t  A  Place  fo  called  in  New-Tor k  Governmcntjnear  Hudfon** 
River,  on  the  Weft  fide  of  the  River. 

fome 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd,     A.D.1744:     ,09 

fomc  Indiam  in  the  Way,  f  anddifcourfed  with  them  concern- 
ingChriftianity.  Was  confiderably  Melancholy  andDi/Gonfolate, 
being  alone  in  a  ftrange  Wildernefs.  On  Saturday,  he  came 
to  a  Settlement  of  Irijh  and  Dutch  People,about  12  Miles  above 
the  Forks  of  Delaware.  ] 

Lord's-Day,  Ma^  13.  Rofe  early  :  Felt  very  poorly  after  my 
long  Journey,  and  after  being  wet  and  fatigued.  Was  very 
Melancholy  -y  have  fcarce  ever  feen  fuch  a  gloomy  Mornincr  irs 
my  Life  ;  there  appeared  to  be  no  Sabbath ;  the  Children  were 
all  at  Play  ;  I  a  Stranger  in  the  Wijdernefsjand  knew  not  where 
to  go  ;  and  all  Circumftances  feem'd  to  confpire  to  render  my 
Affairs  dark  and  difcouraging.  Was  difappointed  refpe^ting  aa 
Interpreter^  and  heard  that  the/ndians  were  much  fcatt^r'd,  ^c. 
Oh,  I  mourned  after  the  Prefence  of  Go^  and  feem*d  like  a 
Creature  banifh'd  from  his  Sight  !  Yet  he  was  pleafed  to  fupport 
my  finking  Soul,  amidft  all  my  Sorrows  ;  fo  that  I  never  enter- 
tained any  Thought  of  quitting  my  Bufmefs  among  the  poor 
Indians '3  but  was  comforted,  to  think,  that  Death  would  'ere 
long  fet  me  free  from  thefeDiftrefies.---  Rode  about  3  or  4  Miles 
to  tfee  Jrijh  People,  where  I  found  fome  that  appeared  Sober  and 
concerned  about  Religion.  My  Heart  then  began  to  be  a  little 
encouraged  :  VVent  and  preached,  fiift  to  the  Iri/hy  and  then  to 
the  Indians  :  And  in  the  Evening,  was  a  little  comforted  ;  my 
Soul  feem'd  to  reft  on  God,  and  take  Courage.  O  that  the  Lord 
would  be  my  Support  and  Comforter  in  an  Evil  World. 

Monday,  Alay  14.  Was  very  bufy  in  fome  neceflary  Studies. 
Felt  my  ielf  very  loofefrom  all  the  World  :  Ail  appeared ^^;7;Vy 
and  Vexation  of  Spirit.  Seera*d  fomething  loncfom  and  difcon- 
folate,  as  if  I  was  banifh'd  from  all  Mankind, and  bereaved  ofa!4 
that  is  called  pleafurable  in  the  World  :  But  appeared  to  my 
feif  fo  vile  and  unworthy,  it  feem'd  fitter  for  me  to  be  here  than 
any  where. 

Tuefday,  May  15.  Still  much  enc^agerl  in  my  Studies  ;  and 
enjoyed  more  Health,  than  i  have  forfomeTime  paft  :  But  W2s 
fjmething  dejected  in  Spirit  with  a  Senfe  of  my  Meannefs  ; 
feem*d  as  if  I  coujd  never  do  any  Thing  at  all  to  any  good  Pur- 
pofe  by  Reafon  of  Ignorance  and  Folly.  O  that  a  Senfe  of  thsfs 
Things  might  work  more  habitual  Humility  in  my  Soul. 


f  See  Mr.  Brainerd*s  Narrative  in  aLetter  to  Mr.  Pemberion, 
at  the  the  End  of  his  Oidiiiittion-Sermon,-—  Pa^e  32,  33. 


no    .5/.  2;.  ^^LIFE 

r  He  coodflucd  naidi  in  the  Ciune  Fnme  the  next  Day.] 

Tburfday,  May  17.  W»j  rfws  Day  grr^tly  diftrefeM  with  a 
Sciife  pf  my  ViJoiefc  :  Appeared  to  ray  Iclt  too  bad  to  walk  oa 
Goa's  Eirth,  or  tc  bf  trcatcc  with  Kindnds  by  any  of  hisCrca- 
turcs.  God  wzi  v.ti'ti  to  let  me  fee  my  inward  Pollution  and 
Corruptioii,  to  fjch  a  Decree,  that  I  aknofi  defpair'd  of  being 
made  hcAy  :  Ob  /  wreuM  Mn  dmt  1  am  f  Wht /bail  deGwr 
mi  frvm  tie  B^df  tf  this  Dtmtb  ^  In  the  Afterntwn,  met  with 
tke  Imei^KS  accordiDg  to  AppcintiDent,  and  preach'd  to  thenu 
Asd  while  riding  to  them,  my  Soul  fetm'xl  to  confide  in  God  ; 
aud  afterwards  had  feme  Relief;  and  Enlargement  of  Soul  in 
Prayer,  ard  fome  Affiftance  in  the  Duty  of  Iriterccffion  :  Vital 
Px:v  and  Holmefs  appeared  iwect  to  me,  and  I  iocged  for  the 
Pcr/eaionof  it. 

Fricav,  Alcy  i  S.  Felt  again  fomething  of  the  fwset  Spirir  of 
Reiitnon  ;  and  my  Soul  feens'd  to  corlice  in  God, that  be  would 
ncTcr  jc2ve  me.—  But  oftentimes  faw  mv  ic]f  (o  mean  a  Crei- 
loxe,  that  I  knew  not  how  to  think  of  Preaching.  O  iha:  I 
conSd  always  live  l»  and  zrpn  Gcd. 

S^rvrdav,  Mcj  iq.  VV25,  fome  Part  of  the  Time,  greatly 
rrp-e'sQ  with  the  Weight  an^Burcen  cf  mv  Work  :  It  fecm'd 
irr'  7:  10  go  thro'  with  the  Bulinefs  I  had  undcr- 

ti^;  -  . .  ^ht.wai  \  ery  calm  and  comfortable  3  And  I 

Umk,  mv  Soul  trudcd  io  God  for  Help. 

Lord* s- Diy,  *ii^  20.  Preach'd  twice  to  the  poor  7«ix«r/, 
2cd  cnioTcd  fome  Freedom  in  fpetkioz,  whi'el  attempted  to 
removs  -         -  ^.  agalnft  Chrifiiaciry.     My  Soul  longed  for 

AMdzz. .  - ,  il.  the  while  ;  for  I  faw  \  had  no  Strength 

fu^cient  lor  teat  Work.  Afterwards,  preach'd  iq  the  Iriji 
People  :  Was  much  aiUfted  in  the  firfl  Prayer,  and  fomething  in 
S^rmoo.  Several  TerioDS  fecm'd  much  concerned  for  their  Souls, 
wiih  "s^bcGT.  I  cifcr  jffed  afterwards  with  much  Freedom  and 
f^ne  Pcxer.  Kz'Zz6  be  God  fcr  2ny  AiHtia^ce  tEoidcd  to  an 
L'nworcnT  Wcrm.     Oti^atleculd  live  to  him  I 

[  Thro*  the  rtS  of  this  Week,  He  was  foroctimes  ready  to 
fink  with  a  Scr.fc  of  hi«  unworihinefs  and  unfitncfs  for  the  Work 
cf  the  Miniftry  ;  and  fome'ir»cs  encouragod  and  lifted  above 
kis  Fears  ^nJ  Sorrows,  and  was  enabled  corfideritly  torelf  on 
Goi  ;  and  cfpeciallj  on  S11.1-  irds  N:gh-,  he  erjoyed 

Caimnefs  cr.d  Compc^ftre,   l  .nee  in  Prayer  to  God. 

He  fcii'Tced  (ts  ht  U\s)  Th^t  G'.d  rezruiMs  tncii&nzeshlj  ffWtfful 
^^/  .-^../  -  .^  a  jbre  and  fffiiUrt  Panic:,  erd  '-•  Dvjf'.hrfi'Pl^ce 
g'  la  in  oI»G{r,(raU9Ki '^  JLrord'i- 


c/A^.  David  Br. 


I II 


Lord's- Day,  AJay  27.  Vifited  my  ladiamy  in  thcMcrEinr, 
and  attcacsd  upon  iFtpursi  among  tba&  :  Was  affc&d  ts  ire 
their  htathenijh  Pra£fias.  O  that  tbcy  mi^t  be  mnud  frzm 
Darknefi  it  Light,  Autrwards,  goC  a  confiderablc  Number 
of  them  together,  and  preacfa'd  to  them  ;  and  obierTed  them 
Very  attcntiTc.  After  this,  preach'd  to  the  White  People  from 
Meb,  ii.  3.  Was  enabLsd  to  fpeak  with  feme  Freedom  aod^ 
Power  :  Several  People  Oeem'd  mach  coocemed  for  thciiSoab,; 
cfpecialiy  one  who  bad  been  educated  a  Raman  CathoUck. 
meS^  be  the  Lord  for  any  Help. 

Monday,  May  28.  Stt  out  from  the  Indians  above  the 
Forks  of  Deiaxcarey  00  a  Journey  towards  Nnuerk  in  A>tD- 
y^y/j,  according  to  toy  Orders.  Rode  thro'  the  Wiidcrcefi  ; 
was  much  fatigued  with  the  Heat ;  locged  at  a  Place  caBed 
Biaci'Rher  ;  was  exceedingly  tired  and  worn  out. 

[  On  Tuesday,  he  came  to  Krvirl  :  Tbe  next  Dar,  west 
to  Elifahttb-Tewn  :  On  Thurfday,  he  went  toXeuj-Tsrk  ;  and 
on  Friday  returned  to  hizfabftb-TTan,  Thefe  Ehjs  were 
rpent  in  feme  Perplexity  of  Mind.  He  ccntinjed  at  Eizfabetb^ 
Tint-? 'tillFridayin  the  Week  following  .W25enliver/d,re:'refh'd 
and  ftrengthen'd  on  the  Sabbath  at  theLord'sTab.'e.The  erfiiing 
Days  of  the  Week  were  fpent  chiefi/  in  Studies  preparatory  ta 
his  Ordination  ;  and  on  fgme  of  them  he  feemed  to  hive  much 
of  Gad's  gracious  Prefence,  and  of  the  fweet  Influences  of 
his  Spirit ;  but  was  in  a  very  weak  Stats  of  Body.  On  SatuC' 
day,  he  rode  to  Nnoari.'^ 

Lord's-Day,  June  i?.     [a:  Nricari'\  In  the  Mominz,W2s 
much  concerned  how  I  fhould  perform  the  Work  of  the  Day  j 
and  trembled  it  the  Thoughts  of  being  left  to  my  felf. —  En- 
joyed very  conliderable  Atfiftance  in  all   Parts  of  the  puback 
Service.     Had  an  Opportunity  again  to  attend  on  the  Ordinance 
of  the  Lord's-Supper,  and  thro*  divine  Goodoe^  was  refrdhM 
in  it :  My  Scyl  was  full  or  Love  and  Tcndcmcfe  towards  the 
Children  of  God,  and  towards  all  Men  :  ftli  a  certain  Sweet- 
ness of  D  ■     '  ^rds  Qwziy  Creature.     At  N:ght,  I  en- 
joyed mc:;  .mi  r*-eet  Deli  re  of  Ho'ineff^   than  I 
hive  fck  for    1"  .T.e  T  me  :   Was  a.riid  of  every  Thought  and 
ever?  MoticHjicit  tbsreb?  mvHeart  fhould  be  drawn  away  from 
God.  *  O  that  I  naight  never  leave  the  blefied  God.     Lord,  sm 
thy  PrefiM.f  is  FfLmfs  sf  Jtj.     O    ths  BicUc  inefs  of  living  to 
God  ! 

Q^  Mcnday, 


JJ2     ^/.  27:  "The   LIFE 

Monday,  June  II.  This  Da^v  iht Pt e [by tery  met  together  at 
Newark,  in  order  to  my  Ordit^ation,  Was  very  weak  and 
diforder'd  in  BoJy  ;  yet  endeavoured  to  repoCe  my  Confidence 
in  God.  S^ent  mod  of  the  D^y  alone;  efpecially  the  Fore- 
noon. At  three  in  the  Afternoon  preached  my  Probation- Ser- 
mon, from  M.  xxvi.  17, 18.  being  a  Text  given  me  for  that 
End.  Felt  not  well,  either  in  Body  or  Mind  ;  however,  God 
carried  me  thro'  comfortably.  Afterwards,  pafs'd  an  Exami- 
nation before  the  Prefhytery,  Was  much  tired,  and  my  Mind 
burden'd  with  the  Greatnefs  of  that  Charge,  I  was  in  the  moft 
folemn  Manner  about  to  take  upon  me  :  My  Mind  was  ^o 
prefs'd  with  the  Weight  of  the  Work  incumbent  upon  me,  that 
I  could  not  fleep  this  Night,  tho'  very  Weary  and  in  great  need 
of  Reft.  ^ 

Tuefday,  June  12.  ^Af as  this  Morning  further  examined, 
rerpe<Slin2  niy  Experimental  Acquaintance  with  Chriftianity.  * 
At  ten  o'clock  my  Oriination  was  attended  :  The  Sermon 
preach'd  by  the  Rev.  Mr.  Pembe?iGn,  At  this  Time  I  was  af- 
fcded  with  a  Senfe  of  the  important  Truft  committed  to 
me  ;  yet  was  Compofed,  and  folemn,  without  Diftrailion  ; 
And  I  hope,  I  then  (  as  many  Times  before)  gave  my  felf  up  to 
God, to  be  for  him,  and  not  for  another.  Q  that  I  might  always 
be  engaged  in  the  Service  of  God^and  duly  remember  the  folemn 
Charge  I  have  received,  I'n  tlie  Prefence  of  God,  Angels  and 
Men  ;  Amen  :  May  I  be  aflifted  of  God  for  this  Purpofe. — 
Towards  Night,  rode  to  £"/./ra^^/.^-7^tc';i. 


*  Mr.  Pejnlerion^  in  a  Letter  to  the  Honourable  Society  in 
Scotland  that  enaployedMr.  5r^;W^, which  he  wrote  con- 
cerning him,  (  publiihed  in  Scoilandyinthe  Chrijiian  month' 
ly  Hiflory  )  writes  thus,  '^  We  can  with  Pleafure  fayjthat 
*«  Mr.  Braitierd  pafs'd  thro'  his  Ordination-Triajsj  to  the 
«<  univerfai  Approbation  of  the  Pr//^)'/^r^,  and  appeared 
«<  uncommonly  qualiMed  for  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry. 
«*  fie  feem:-  to  be  armed  with  a  great  deal  of  Self-denial, 
< «  and  animated  with  a  noble  Zeal  to  propagate  the  Gofpel 
'«  amo.ng  thofc  barbarous  Nations,  who  have  long  dwelt 
<«  in  the  Darknefs  of  Hcaihenifm. 

FART 


of  Mr*  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  i 


744*       113 


/ 


Part     Vt. 


From  his  Ordination,  'till  he  fir  ft  began  to 
preach  to  the  Indians  at  Crolweckfung, 
among  who??t  he  had  his  mojl  remarkakk 
Succe/s.  4/,^  '      ' 


WEdnefday,  Jwne  13.     Spent  forrve  confiderable  Time  \x\ 
writing  an  Account  of  the  Indian  Affairs  to  go  to  Scot- 
land ;   fpencfome  Time  in  Converfation  with  Friends  j 
But  enjoy'd  not  much  Sweetnefs  and  Satisfadion. 

Thurfday,  yune  14.  Received  fome  particular  Kindnefs  from 
Friends  ;  and  wondered,  that  Goc(  fliould  open  the  Hearts  of 
any  to  treat  me  with  Kindnefs :  Saw  my  felf  to  be  unworthy  of 
any  Favour, from  God,  or  any  of  nrc'  Fellow-Men.  Was'much 
exercifed  with  Pain  in  my  Head  ;  ^owever  determined  to  fet 
out  on  my  Journey  towards  Deiawan  in  the  Afternoen  i  put 
in  the  Afternoon  my  Pain  increafed  exceedingly  ;  To  that  I  v/asjob- 
liged  to  betake  my  (c](  to  theBed  ;  and  tbeNight  foJIowingJvvas 
greatly  diftrefs'd  withPain  andSicknefs  .'i^Was  fometimes  aljinoft 
bereaved  of  the  Exercifc  of  Re^fon  by  the  Extremity  of  rain. 
Continued  muchDiftrefs'd  'till  Saturday  ;  when  I  was/fomeping^ 
reliev'd  by  an  Emetick  :  But  was  unable  to  v;a]k  abroad  Mil 
the  Monday  following,  in  the  Afternoon  ;  and  l^ill  rcmain*d 
very  feeble.  I  often  admired  the  Goodnefs  of  God,  that  he 
did  not  TufFer  me  to  proceed  on  my  Journey  from  thi-s  Place 
where  I  was  fo  tenderly  ufed,and  to  be  Sick  by  the  VVay  amon-: 
Strangers.—-  God  is  very  gracious  to  me,  both  in  Health  ai-. 
Sicknefs,  and  intermingles  much  Mercy  with  all  my  Aifli^^llrni 
and  Toils,  Enjoyed  fonie  Sweetnefs  in  Things  divine,  in  ihc 
midft  of  my  Pain  and  Weaknefs.  Oh,  that  I  could  praife  tl:^ 
Lord. 

Q    2  V'^^ 


:ii4      mt.z-j.  r/^-^LIFE 

[  On  Tuefday,  'June  19.  He  fet  out  on  his  Journey  Home, 
and  in  three  Days  reached  his  Place,  near  the  Forks  of  Dela- 
ware. Performed  the  Journey  under  much  Wcaknefs  of  Body  ; 
but  had  Comfort  in  his  Soul,  from  Day  to  Day  :  And  both  his 
Weaknefs  of  Bodyjand  Confolation  of  Mind  continued  through 
the  Week.] 

Lord^s-Da^^,  June  24.  Extreamly  Feeble  ;  fcarce  able  to 
walk  :  However,  vifited  my  h.dians^  and  took  much  Pains 
lo  inflrucl  them  :  Laboured  with  fome  that  were  much  difaf- 
i"e<Sed  to  Chriflianity.  MyMind  was  much  burden'd  with  the 
Weight  and  Difficulty  of  my  Work.  My  whole  Dependence 
2nd  Hope  of  Succefs  feem'd  to  be  on  God  ;  who  alone  I  faw 
could  make  them  willing  to  receive  Infirudlion.  My  Heart 
Was  much  engaged  in  Prayer, fending  up  filent  Requeftsto  God, 
even  while  I  was  fpeaking  to  them.  O.that  I  could  always  go 
in  the  Strength  of  the  Lord. 

Monday,  June  2£.  Was  fomething  better  in  Health  than 
of  late  :  Was  able  to  fpend  a  confiderable  Part  of  the  Day  in 
Prayer  and  clofe  Studies.  Had  more  Freedqm  and  Fervency  in 
Prayer  than  ufual  of  late  :  EfpeciaJly  long'd  for  the  Prefence  of 
God  in  my  Work,  and  that  the  poor  Heathen  might  be  con- 
verted. And  in  Evening-Prayer  my  Faith  and  Hope  in  God 
were  much  raifed.  To  an  Eye  of  Reafon  every  Thing  that 
lefpccSs  the  Conveifion  of  the  Heathen  is  as  dark  as  Midnight  ; 
and  yet  I  can^t  but  hope  in  Got!  for  the  Accomplifhment  of 
Something  glorious  among  them.  My  Soul  longed  much  for 
ihe  Advancement  of  the  Redeemer's  Kingdom  onEarth.  Was 
very  fearful  left  I  ftiould  admit  fome  vain  Thought,  and  fo  lofc 
the  Senfe  I  then  had  of  divine  Things.  O  for  an  abiding  hea- 
venly Temper   ! 

Tuefday,  Jur?e  26.  In  the  Morning,  my  Dcfires  feem*d  to 
rifcjand  afccnd  up  freely  to  God.  W^s  bufy  mofl  of  theDay  in 
tranflating  Prayers  into  the  Language  of  the  Delaware- Indiani  : 
Met  with  j>reat  Difficulty  by  Reafon  that  my  Interpreter  was 
altogether  unacquainted  with  theBufmefs.  But  tho'  I  was  much 
difcouraged  with  the  cxtream  l^ifficulty  of  that  Work,  yet 
God  fupportcd  me  ;  and  efpecially  in  the  Evening,  gave  me 
fvveet  Refrcfhment  :  [n  Prayer  my  Soul  was  enlarged,  and  my 
I'aith  drawn  into  fenf»ble  Exercife  ;  was  enabled  to  cry  to  God 
/or  my  poor  JrJiam  ;  and  tho*  the  Work  of  their  Converfion 
'appeared  imp^ffibU  with  Afan,  y^t  with  God  I  faw  ali  Things  were 
tofiHe,     Aiy  Taith   w.!"   riiucb  iir?njfhen*(),  by  .obferving  the 

vvondcrfuj 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1744.     1 15 

wonderful  Affiftance  God  afForded  his  Servants  Nehemlah  and 
Ezra^  in  reforming  his  People,  and  re-eftablifhing  his  antient 
Church.  I  was  much  affifted  in  Prayer  for  dear  Chriftian 
Friends,  and  for  others  that  1  apprehended  to  be  Chriftlefs  ; 
but  was  more  efpecially  concerned  for  the  poor  Heathen,  and 
thofe  of  my  own  Charge  :  Was  enabled  to  be  inftant  in  Prayer 
for  them  ;  and  hoped  that  God  would  bow  the  Heavens  and 
come  down  for  their  Salvation.  It  feem'd  to  me,-  there  could 
be  no  impediment  fufficient  to.obftru6l  that  glorious  Work, 
feeing  the  living  God,  as  I  ftrongly  hoped,  was  engaged  for  it. 
I  continued  in  a  folemn  Frame,  lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God  for 
Afliftance,  and  Grace,  that  I  might  be  more  mortified  to  this 
prefent  World,  that  my  whole  Soul  might  be  taken  up  conti- 
nually in  Concern  for  tli^Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  : 
Longed  that  God  would  purge  me  more,  that  I  might  be  as  a 
chofen  Veflel  to  bear  hisName  among  the  Heathens.  Con-Cinued 
in  this  Frame  'till  I  drop'd  afleep. 

Wednefday,  June  27.  Felt  fomething  of  the  fame  folemn 
Concern,  and  Spirit  of  Prayer,  that  I  enjoy'd  laft  Night,  foon 
after  I  rofe  in  the  Morning.-—  In  the  Afternoon,  rode  feveral 
Miles  to  fee  if  I  could  procure  any  Lands  for  the  poor  Indians^ 
that  they  might  live  together,  and  be  under  better  Advantages 
for  Inftru£tion.  While  I  was  riding,  had  a  deep  Senfe  of  the 
Greatnefs  and  Difficulty  of  my  Work  ;  and  my  Soul  feemed 
to  rely  wholly  upon  God  for  Succefs,  in  the  diligent  and  faith- 
ful ufe  of  Means.  Saw,  with  greateft  Certainty,  that  the  Arm 
of  the  Lord  mufl  be  revealed^  for  the  Help  of  thefe  poor  Hea- 
then, if  ever  they  were  delivered  from  the  Bondage  of  thePow- 
ers  of  Darknefs.  Spent  moft  of  the  Time,  while  riding,  ia 
lifting  up  my  Heart  for  Grace  and  Alliftance. 

Thurfday,  June  28.  Spent  the  Morning,  in  reading  feveral 
Parts  of  the  Holy  Scripture,  and  in  fervent  Prayer  for  my  In- 
dians^ that  God  would  fet  up  his  Kingdom  among  them,  and 
bring  them  into  his  Church.—-  About  nine,  I  withdrew  to 
my  ufual  Place  of  Retirement  in  the  Woods  ;  and  there  again 
enjoyed  fome  Afnlhnce  in  Prayer.  My  great  Concern  was  for 
the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen  to  God  ;  and  the  Lord  helped 
me  to  plead  with  him  for  it.  Towards  Noon,  rode  up  to  the 
Indians^  in  order  to  preach  to  'em  ;  and  while  going,  my  Heart 
went  up  to  God  in  Prayer  for  'em  ;  could  freely  tell  God,  He 
knew  that  the  Caufe  was  not  mine,  which  I  was  engaged  in  ; 
but  it  was  his  own  Caufe,  and  it  would  be  for  his  own  Qlory  to 
convert  the  poor  Indians :  A^nd  bleflcd  be  God, I  felt  ng  Defire 

of 


ji6    JEt.  2y.  nehlFE 

of  theirConverfion,that  I  might  receiveHonour  from  theWorld, 
as  being  the  Inftrument  of  ic.  Had  fome  Freedom  in  fpeaking 
to  the  Indians, 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  fome  ferious  Concern  for  the 
Kingdom  of  the  bleiTed  Redeemer  -,  but  complains  much  of 
Bariennefs,  Wandrings,  Inadivity,  ^c.  ] 

Saturday,  June  30.  My  Soul  was  much  Solemnized  in  read- 
ing God*sWord  ;  efpecially  the  ninth  Chapter  oi  Daniel.  J  faw 
how  God  had  called  out  his  Servants  to  Prayer,  and  made  them 
wreftle  with  him,  when  hedefigned  to  beftow  any  great  JVler- 
cy  on  his  Church.  And  alas,  I  was  afhamed  of  my  felf,  to  think 
of  myDulnefs  and  Ina6livity,when  there  feemed  to  be  fo  much  to 
do  for  the  upbuilding  of  Zion.  Oh,  howdoes  Zion  lie  wafie^!  £ 
longed,  that  the  Church  of  God  might  be  enlarged  :  Was  ena- 
bled to  pray,  I  think,  in  Faith  :  My  Soul  feem'd  fenfibly  to 
confide  in  God,  and  was  enabled  to  wrefile  with  him.  After- 
wards, walk'd  Abroad  to  a  Place  of  fweet  Retirement,  and  en- 
joyed fome  AfTiftance  in  Prayer  again  :  Had  a  Senfe  of  my  great 
need  of  divine  Help,  and  felt  my  Soul  fenfibly  depend  on  God. 
Blefled  be  God,  this  has  been  a  comfortable  Week  to  me. 

Lord's-Day  July  i.  In  the  Morning,  was  perplex'd  with 
wandring  vain  Thoughts  :  Was  much  grieved,  judged  and 
condemned  my  felf  before  God.  And  Oh,,  how  miferable  did 
1  feel,  becaufc  I  couid  not  live  toGod  !  At  ten,  rode  away  with 
a  heavy  Heart,  to  preach  to  my  Indians.  Upon  the  Road,  1 
attempted  to  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God  ;  but  v/as  infeffed  with 
an  unfcttled  wandring  Frame  of  Mind  ;  and  was  exce'feding 
reftlefs  and  perplex'd,  and  filPd  with  Shame  and  Confufion  be- 
fore God.  1  feem*d  to  my  felf  to  be  more  hrutifl)  than  anyA4an  ; 
and  thought,  none  deferved  to  be  ca(i  out  of  God'^  Pr e fence  (o 
much  as  I.  If  [  attempted  to  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God,  as  I 
frequently  did  by  the  Way,  on  a  fudden,  before  I  was  aware, 
my  Thoughts  were  wandring  to  the  Ends  of  the  Earth  :  And  my 
Soul  was  fill'd  with  Surprize  andAnxiety,  to  find  it  thus.  Thus 
alfo  afterl  came  to  the7«^/^«;,myMind  was  confufed  ;  and  I  felt 
nothing  fenfibly  of  that  fweet  Reliance  on  God,  that  my  Soul 
has  been  comforted  with  in  Days  paft.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in 
this  Polture  of , Mind,  and  preachM  to  the  Indians  without  any  . 
Heart.  In  the  Afternoon,  I  felt  flill  barren,  when  I  began  to 
preach  ;  and  after  about  half  an  Hour,  I  feem'd  to  my  kU  to 
know  nothing;,  and  to  have  nothing  to  fay  to  the  Indians  ;  but 

foon 


r/iV^r.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1744.     117 

e 

foon  after,  1  found  in  my  felf  a  Spirit  of  Love,  and  Warmth, 
and  Power  to  addrefs  the  poor  Indians  ;    and  God  helped  mc 
to  plead  with  them  to   turn  frcm  all  the  Faniii£s  of  the  Heathen^ 
i9  the  living  God  :  And  I  am  perfwaded,  the  Lord  touch'd  their 
Confciences  ;   for  I  never  faw  fuch  Attention  raifed  in  thera  be- 
fore.    And   when  I  came   away  from  them,  I  fpent  the  whole 
Time  while  I  was  riding  to  my  Lodgings,  three  Miles  diftant, 
in  Prayer  and  Praife  to  God.     And  after  I  had  rode  more  than 
two  Miles,  it  came  into  my  Mind  to  dedicate  my  felf  to  God 
again  ;  which  I  did  with  great  Solemnity,   and   unfpeakable 
Satisfadlion  ;  efpecially  gave  up  my  felf  to  him  renewedly  in 
the  Work  of  the  Miniftry.      And  this  I  did   by  divine  Grace, 
I  hope,    without  any  Exception  or  Referve  ;  not  in   the  leaft 
fhrinking  back  from  any  Difficulties,   that  might  attend  this 
great  and  blefl'ed   Work.     I  feem*d  to  be  moft  free,  chearful, 
and  full  in  this  Dedication  of  my  felf.     My  whole  Soul  cried, 
"   Lord,  to  thee  I  dedicate  my  felf  :  O  accept  of  me,  and  let 
"  me  be  thine  forever.     Lord,  I  defire  nothing  elfe  ;  I   defire 
"   nothing  more.  O  come,  come,  Lord,  accept  a  poor  Worm. 
"   Whom  have  1  in   Heaven^  but  thee  ;  and  there  is   none  upon 
<«    Earthy  that  1  dffire  be/tdes  thee.''   After  this,  was  enabled  to 
praife  God   with  my    whole  Soul,  that  he  had  enabled  me  to 
devote  and  confecrate  all  my  Powers  to  him  in  this  folcmnMan- 
ner.     My  Heart  rejoyced  in  my  particular  Work  as  a  MiJJis- 
nary  ;  rejoyced  in  myNeceffity  of  Self-denial  in  manyRefpcdb  ; 
and  (till  continued  to  give  up  my  felf  to  God,  and  implore  Mer- 
cy of  him  ;  praying  inceflantly,  every  Moment,   with  fwcet 
Fervency.     My  Nature  being  very  weak  of  laie,    and  much 
fpent,  was    now  confiderably  overcome  :  My    Fingers  grew 
very    feeble,   and  fomew^hat  numb  ;    fo  that  I  could    fcarce'y 
ftretch  them  out  (freight  :  And  when  I  lighted  from  m^'  Horfr, 
could  hardly  walk  :  My  Joints  feem'd  all  to  be  loofed.     But  I 
felt   abundant    Strergth  in   the  inner  Ahn.     Preach'd    to  the 
White  People  :   God  helped   me  much,   efpecially   in  Prayer. 
Sundry  of  my  poor  Indians  were  fo  moved  as  to  come  to  Meet- 
ing alfo  ;  and  one  appeared  much  concerned. 

Monday,  July  2.  Had  fome  Relifli  of  the  divine  Comforts 
of  Yefterday  ;  but  could  not  get  that  VVarmth  and  Exercifc  of 
Faith,  that  I  defired.  Had  fometimes  a  didrefling  Senfe  of  my 
paft  Follies,  and  prcfent  Ignorance  and  Barrennefs  :  And 
efpecially  in  the  Afternoc^i,  was  funk  down  under  a  Load  of 
Sin  and  Guilt,  in  that  I  had  lived  fo  little  to  God, after  his  abun- 
dant Goodntfs  to  me  Yefterday.     In  the  Evening,  tho'  very 


ii8      muii.  W^  LIFE 

weak,  was  enabled  to  pray  with  Fervency,  and  to  continue  in* 
ftant  in  Prayer,  near  an  Hour.  My  Soul  mourned  over  the 
Power  of  its  Corruption,  and  longed  exceedingly  to  be  wofh^d 
and  purgid  as  with  HyJJop.  Was  enabled  to  pray  for  my  dear 
abfent  Friends,  Chrift's  Minifters,  and  hisChurch  ;  and  enjoyed 
much  Freedom  and  Fervency,  but  not  fo  much  Comfort,  by 
Reafon  of  Guilt  andShame  beforeGod.—  Judged  and  condemned 
my  felf  for  the  Follies  of  the  D,ay. 

Tuefday,  July  3.  Was  ftill  very  weak.  This  Morning, 
was  enabled  to  pray  under  a  feeling  Senfe  of  my  need  of  Help 
from  God, and,  J  trufi,  had  feme  Faith  inExercife  ;  and,blefled 
be  God,  was  enabled  to  plead  with  God  a  confiderable  Time. 
Truly  God  is  good  to  me.  But  my  Soul  mourned  and  was 
grieved  at  my  Sinfulnefs  and  Barrennefs,  and  long'd  to  be  more 
engaged  for  God.  Near  nine,  withdrew  again  for  Prayer  j  and 
thro*  divine  Goodnefs,  had  the  blefled  Spirit  of  Prayer ;  my 
Soul  loved  the  Duty,  and  lorded  for  God  in  it.  O  it  is  fweet 
to  be  the  Lord's,  to  be  fenlibly  devoted  to  him  I  What  a  blefled 
Portion  is  God  .!  How  glorious,  how  lovely  in  himfelf  !  O 
my  Soul  long'd  to  improve  Time  wholly  for  God  !-—  Spent 
moft  of  the  Day  in  iranflating  Prayers  into  Indian.—  In  the 
Evening,  was  enabled  again  to  wreftle  with  God  in  Prayer  with 
Fervency.  Was  enabled  to  maintain  a  Self-diffident  and  watch- 
ful Frame  of  Spirit,  in  the  Evening,  and  was  jealous  and  afraid 
left  I  fhould  admit  Carelefnefs  and  Self- Confidence. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  feems  to  have  had  fpecial  AfTiftance  and 
Fervency  moft  of  the  Day, but  in  a  lefs  Degree  than  the  preceed- 
ing  Day.  Thurfday  was  fpent  in  great  bodily  Weaknefs  ; 
yet  feems  to  have  been  fpent  in  continual  and  excefedingPainful- 
nefs  in  Religion  ;  but  in  great  Bitternefs  of  Spirit  by  Reafon  of 
his Vilenefs  and  Corruption  ;  he  fays  thus,  1  thought  there  was  not 
one  Creature  living  Jo  viie  as  ].  Oh^  my  inward  Pollution  !  Oh^ 
rny  Guilt  and  Shame  before  God  !-—  I  know  not  what  to  do,  Oh^ 
1  long'd  ardently  to  he  clear  fed  and  wafhed  from  the  Stains  of  in- 
ward Pollution  !  Oh,  to  be  made  like  God, or  rather  to  be  made 
fit  for  God  to  own.] 

Friday,  July  6.  Aw(ike  this  Morning  in  the  Fear  of  God  : 
Soon  cnlled  to  Mind  my  Sadnefs  in  the  Evening  pafi  ;  and  fpent 
my  firlt  waking  Minutes  in  Prayer  for  Sandification,  that  my 
Soul  might  be  wafti'd  from  its  exceeding  Pollution  and  Defile- 
ment.   Alter  1  arofe,  !  fpent  feme  Time  in  rcadingGod's  Word 

and 


c/M-.  David  Brainerd;      A.D.1744:     119 

and  Pray  cr  :  1  cried  to  God  tinder  a  Senfe  of  my  great  Indigen- 
cy.— I  am,  of  late,  moft  of  all  concerned  for  Minifterial  Q^iali- 
lications,  and  the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen  :  Laft  Year  I 
longed  to  be  prepared  for  a  World  oi  Glory ^  and  fpeedily  to  de- 
part out  of  this  World  ;  but  of  late  all  my  Concern  almoft  is 
for  the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen  5  and  for  thatEnd,  I  long  to 
live.  But  bleflcd  be  God,  I  have  lefs  defire  to  live  for  any  of 
the  Pleafures  of  the  World,  than  ever  I  had  :  I  long  and  love  to 
be  a  Pilgrim ;  and  want  Grace  to  imitate  the  Life,  Labours 
and  Sufferings  of  St.  Paul  among  the  Heathen.  And  when  I 
long  for  Holinefs  now,it  is  not  fomuch  for  my  felf  as  formerly  5 
but  rather  that  thereby  I  may  become  an  able  Minijier  of  the 
NgW'Te/iament,  efpecially  to  the  Heathen.  Spent  about  two 
Hours  this  Morning  inReading  and  Prayer  by  Turns  5  and  was 
in  a  watchful  tender  Frame,  afraid  of  every  Thing  that  might 
cool  my  AfFedions,  and  draw  away  my  Heart  from  God,  Was 
fomething  ftrengthen'd  in  my  Studies  3  but  near  Night  was 
very  weak  and  weary. 

Saturday,  J^uly  7.  Was  very  much  difordered  thisMorning, 
and  my  Vigour  all  fpent  and  exhaufted  :  But  was  affected  and 
jefrefh'd  in  reading  the  fweet  Story  of  Elijah's  TranfIation,and 
enjoyed  fome  AfFedion  and  Fervency  in  Prayer  5  longed  much 
for  Minifterial  Gifts  and  Graces,  that  I  might  do  fomething  in 
the  Caufe  of  God.  Afterwards  was  refrefh'd  and  invigorated > 
while  readingMr.  yofephJl/eine'shr&CafeoiConkienzQ^^c.znd 
enabled  then  to  pray  with  feme  Ardour  of  Soul,  and  was  afraid 
of  Carelefnefs  and  Self- Confidence,  and  longed  for  Holinefs. 

Lord's-Day,  yuly  g.  Was  ill  laft  Night,  not  able  to  red 
quietly.  Had  fome  fmall  Degree  of  AiTiftance  in  preaching  to 
the  Indians  ;  and  afterwards  was  enabled  to  preach  to  the  White 
People  with  fome  Power,  efpecially  in  the  Clofe  of  my  Difcourfe 
from  Jer,  iii.  23.  The  Lord  alfo  aflifted  me  in  fome  Meafurc 
in  the  firft  Prayer  :  BleiTed  be  his  Name.  Near  Night,  tho* 
very  weary,  was  enabled  to  read  God's  Word  with  fome  (wcct 
Relifh  of  it,  and  to  pray  with  Affection,  Fervency,  and  ( [  truft) 
Faith:  My  Soul  was  more  fenfibly  dependent  on  God,  than 
ufual.  Was  watchful,  tender,  and  jealous  of  my  own  Heart, 
left  {  (hould  admit  Carelefnefs  and  vain  Thoughts,  and  grieve 
the  blclTed  Spirit,  fo  that  he  fhould  withdraw  his  fweet,  kind> 
and  tender  Influences.  Long'd  to  depart  and  h  tuithChr iff  ^moic 
than  at  any  Time  of  late.  My  Soul  was  exceedingly  united  tc* 
the  Saints  of  ancient  Times,  as  well  as  thofe  now  living  ;  efpe- 
cially my  Soul  melted  for  the  Society  of  Elijah  and  EHJha. 

R  Waj 


120     /EL  27.  "The  LIFE 

Was  enabled  to  cry  to  God  with  a  Child-like  Spirit,  and  tfl 
continue  inftant  in  Prayer  for  feme  Time.  Was  much  enlarged 
in  the  Tweet  Duty  of  Interceffion  :  Was  enabled  to  remember 
great  Numbers  of  dear  Friends,  and  precious  Souls,  as  well  as 
Chrift's  Minifters.  Continued  in  this  Frame,  afraid  of  every 
idle  Thought,  'till  I  dropM  aileep. 

Monday,  July  9.  Was  under  much  Illnefs  of  Body  moft  of 
the  Day,  and  notable  to  fit  up  the  whole  Day.  TowardsNight, 
felt  a  little  better.  Then  fpent  fomeTime  in  reading  God's 
Word  and  Prayer  :  Enjoy'd  fome  Degree  of  Fervency  and  Af- 
fe<Stion  :  Was  enabled  to  plead  with  God  for  his  Caufe  and 
Kingdom  :  And,  thro'  divine  Goodnefs,  It  was  apparent  to  me 
that  it  was  his  Caufe  I  pleaded  for,  and  not  my  own  :  And  was 
enabled  to  make  this  an  Argument  with  God  to  anfwer  my 
Requefts. 

Tuefday,  ^uly  10.     Was  very  ill  and  full  of  Pain,  and  very 
dull  and  fpiritlefs.---  In  the  Evening,   had  an  aiFedting  Scnfe  of 
my  Ignorance,  ifiV.  and  of  my  need  of  God  at  all  Times,  to  do 
every  Thing  for  me  ;  and  my  Soul  was  humbled  before  God. 

Wcdnefday,  Ja/y  II.  Was  ftill  exercifed  with  Illnefs  and 
Pain.  Had  fome  Degree  of  AfFecSion  and 'Warmth  in  Pray- 
er and  reading  God's  Word  :  Long'd  for  Abraham^i  Faith  and 
Fellowfhip  with  God ;  and  felt  fome  Refolution  to  fpend  all  my 
Time  for  God,  and  to  exert  ray  felf  with  more  Fervency  in 
bis  Service  j  but  found  my  Body  weak  and  feeble.  In  the 
Afternoon,  tho'  very  ill, was  enabled  to  fpend  fome  confiderable 
Time  inPrayer  ;  fpent  indeed  moft  of  theDay  in  that  Exercife  ; 
an^  my  Soul  was  diffident,  watchful  and  tender,  left  1  fhould 
ofFend  my  blefled  Friend,  in  Thought  or  Behaviour.  I  am 
perfwaded  my  Soul  confided  in, and  lean'd  upon  the  blcfTedGod. 
OhjWhat  need  did  1  fee  my  felf  to  ftand  in  of  God  at  all  Times, 
to  a/Tift  me  and  lead  me  I— Found  a  great  want  of  Strength  and 
Vigour,  both  in  the  outward  and  inner  Man. 

[  TheExercifes  an(lExperiences,that  he  fpeaks  of  in  the  ne^ct 
njneDay.sare  verySimilar  to  ihofeof  tbe  prcceecJinoDaySjOf  this 
and  the  foregoinpr  \'/eek  ;  aSenfeof  his  own  Weaknefs,  Igno- 
rance, UnproficableneCs,  and  Vilenefs  ;  loathing  and  abhorring 
hjmfcif  ;  Seif-difHdence  ;  Senfeof  the  Grcatnefsof  his  Work, 
and  his  great  need  of  divine  Help,  and  the  extream  Danger  of 
Self-Confi'ic-nce  ;  loBging'for  Flolinefs  and  Humility,  and  to 
be  fitted  fcr  his  Work  ;  and  to  live  toGod  ;  and  longing  for  the 
Converfnn  of  the  indium ;  and  thcfc  Things  to  a  ?ery  great 
Degree-.] 

Sitorday, 


ef  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 744:      1 2 1 

Saturday,  Jaiy  21.  This  Morning,  was  greatly  opprefled 
with  Guilt  and  Shame,  from  a  Senfe  of  inward  Vilenefs  and 
Pollution.  About  nine,  withdrew  to  the  Woods  for  Prayer  ; 
but  had  not  much  Comfort  ;  I  appeared  to  my  felf  the  vileft 
meaneft  Creature  upon  Earth,  and  could  fcarcely  live  with  my 
felf;  fo  mean  and  vile  I  appeared,  that  1  thought  I  (liould  never 
be  able  to  hold  up  my  Face  in  Heaven,  if  God  of  his  infinite 
Grace  fhould  bring  me  thither.  Towards  Night  my  Burden 
refpeding  my  Work  among  ihtlndians  began  to  increafe  much  ; 
and  was  aggravated  by  hearing  fundry  Things  that  look'd  very 
difcouraging,  in  particular  that  they  intended  to  meet  together 
the  next  Day  for  an  idolatrous  Feaji  and  Dance,  Then  I  began 
to  be  in  Anguifh  :  I  thought  I  mult  in  Confcience  go  and  en- 
deavour to  break  them  up  ;  and  knew  nothov/  to  attempt  fuch 
a  Thing.  However  I  withdrew^  for  Prayer,hoping  forStrength 
from  above.  And  in  Prayer  I  was  exceedingly  enlarged,  and 
my  Soul  was  as  much  drawn  out  as  ever  I  remember  it  to  have 
been  in  my  Life,  or  near.  I  was  in  fuch  Anguifli,  and  pleaded 
with  fo  much  Earncftnefs  and  Importunity,  that  when  I  rofe 
from  my  Knees  I  felt  extreamly  weak  and  overcome,  I  could 
fcarcely  walk  flrait,  mv  Joints  were  loofed,  the  fweat  ran  down 
my  Face  andBody,  &Nature  feem'd  as  if  it  would  di/Tolve.  So 
far  as  I  could  judge,  I  was  wholly  free  Uomfelfijl)  Ends  in  my 
ferventSupplications  for  the  poor  Indians,  I  knew,  they  were 
met  together  to  worftiip  Devils^  and  not  God  ;  and  this  made 
me  cry  earneflJy,  that  God  would  now  appear,  and  help  me  in 
my  Attempts  to  break  up  this  idolatrous  Meeting.  My  Soul 
pleaded  long  ;  and  I  thought,  God  would  hear,  and  would  go 
with  me  to  vindicate  his  own  Caufe  :  I  feem'd  io  confide  in 
God  for  his  Prefence  and  Afliftance.  And  thus  I  fpent  the 
Evening,  praying  incefTantly  for  divine  Affidance,  and  that  I 
might  not  be  Self»dependent,  but  flill  have  my  whole  Depen- 
dance  upon  God.  What  I  pafs'd  thro*  was  remarkable,  and 
indeed  inexprefTible.  All  Things  here  below  vanifh'd  ;  and 
there  appeared  to  be  nothing  of  any  confiderable  Importance  to 
me,  but  Holinefs  of  Heart  and  Life,  and  the  Converfion  of  the 
Heathen  to  God.  All  my  Cares,  Fears  and  Defires,  which 
might  be  (aid  to  be  of  a  worldly  Nature,  difappeared  ;  and 
were,  in  my  Efteem,  of  little  more  Importance  than  a  PufFof 
Wmd.  I  exceedingly  long'd,  that  God  would  get  to  hmfelfa 
IMami  among  the  Heathen :  And  I  appealed  to  him  with  th* 
greateft  Freedom,  that  he  knew  I  perfer'd  him  above  my  chief 
J^h    Ind^edj  I  had  noNotion  of  Joy  from  this  World ;  I  carei 

R2  not 


122    ^t.tf.  Thel^WE 

not  where  or  how  I  lived,  or  what  Hard(hips  1  went  thro'  ;  fo 
that  I  could  but  gain  Souls  to  Christ.  I  continued  in  this 
Frame  all  the  Evening  and  Night.  While  I  was  afleep,  I 
dream*d  of  thefe Things  ;  and  when  I  waked  (as  I  frequently 
did)  the  firft  Thing  I  thought  of  was  this  great  Work  of  plead- 
ing for  God  againlt  Satan, 

Lord's- Day,  ytt/>  22.     When  I  waked,  my  Soul  was  bur* 
denM  with  what  feemed  to  be  before  me  :  I  cried   to  God,  be- 
fore I  could  get  out  of  my  Bed  :  And  as  foon  as  I  was  drefs'd, 
J  withdrew  into   the  Woods,  to  pour  out  my  burden'd  Soul  to 
God,  efpecially  forAffiftance  in  my  great  Work  ;  for  I  could 
fcarcely  think  of  any  Thing  elfe  :  And  enjoyed  the  fame  Free- 
dom and  Fervency  as  the  lafl  Evening  ;  and  did  with  unfpeaka- 
ble  Freedom  give  up  my  felf  afrefh  to  God,  for  Lifeor  Death, 
for  all  Hardftiips  be  fliould  call  me  to  among  the  Heathen  ;  and 
felt  as  if  nothing  could  difcourage  me  from  this  blefled  Work, 
I  had  a  (trong  Hope,  that  God  would  bow  the  Heavens  and  come 
down^  and  do  feme  marvellous  Work  among  the  Heathen.     And 
when  I  was  riding  to  the  Indians^  three  Miles,  my  Heart  was 
continually  goin^  up  to   God  for  his  Prefence  and  Affiftance  ; 
and  hoping^asd  almoft  expe6ling,  thatGod  would  make  this  the 
JD ay  of  bis  Power  and  Grace  amongft  the  poor  Indians,     When 
i  came  to  them,  I  found  them   engaged  in  their  FroUcky  but 
thro'divineGoodnefs  I  got  them  to  break  up,  and  attend  to  my 
Preaching  :  Yet  Itill  there  appeared  nothing  of  the  fpecial  Pow- 
^r  of  God  among  them.     Preach'd  again  to  them  in  the  Af- 
ternoon ;  and  ohkxvzfl^xht Indians  were  more  foi?er  than  before; 
But    ftill    faw  nothing   fpecial  among:   them  ;    from  whence 
Satan  took  occafion  to  tempt  and  bufFet    me  with  thefe  curfed 
Suggfftion3,T/^^r^  is  noCod^ci  if  there  be,he  is  not  able  toconvcif 
the  Indians^  before  they  had  more  Knowledge,  i^fc.  I  was  very 
weak  and  weary,  and  my  Soul  born  down  with  Perplexity  :  But 
was  mortified  to  all  the  World,  and  was  determined  ftill  to  wait 
upon  God  for  the  Converfion  of  the  Heathen,  tho'  the    Devil 
•jcmpted  me  to  the  contra-^y. 

Monday,  yw/y  23,  Retained  ftill  a  deep  and  prefllng  Senfc 
of  what  lay  with  fo  much  V/eight  upon  me  Yefterday  :  But 
was  more  calm  and  quiefj'  enjoyed  Freedom  and  Compofurc, 
after  the  Temptations  of  the  laft  Evening  :  Had  fweet  Refigna- 
tion  to  the  diviiie  Will  ;  and  defired  nothing  fo  much  as  thp 
Converfion  of  the  Heathen  to  God,  and  that  hisKingdom  might 
i:ame  in  ray  own  Heart,  and  the  Hearts  of  others.  Rode  to  a 
isttl^Ojent  cf  4'''fi  People,  about  15  Miles  South- W^Hwardj 


hfMnDivid  Braincrd     A.D.  1744.^      123 

foent  my  Time  in  Prayer  and  Meditation  by  the  Way.  Near 
Night,  preach'dfrom  Math.  v.  3.—  God  was  pleas'd  to  afford 
me  fome  Degree  of  Freedom  and  Fervency.  BlefTed  be  God 
for  any  Meafure  of  Affiftance. 

Tuefday,  Juljf  24.  Rode  about  17  Miles  Weftward,  over 
a  hideous  Mountain,  to  a  Number  of  Indians.  Got  together 
near  30  of  *em  :  Preach'd  to  'em  in  the  Evening,  and  lodg'd 
among  them  f.—  Was  vireak,  and  felt  fomething  difconfolate: 
Yet  could  have  no  Freedom  in  the  Thought  of  any  other  Cir- 
cumftanccs  or  Bufinefs  in  Life  :  All  my  Defire  was  the  Couver- 
fion  of  the  Heathen,  and  all  my  Hope  was  in  God  :  God  does 
not  fuiFer  me  to  pleafe  or  comfort  my  felf  with  Hopes  of  feeing 
Friends,  returning  to  my  dear  Acquaintance,  and  enjoying 
worldly  Comforts. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  preach'd  to  thefe  Indians  again  ;  and 
then  returned  to  the  Irijb  Settlement,  and  there  preach'd  to  a 
numerous  Congregation  :  There  was  a  confiderable  Appear* 
ance  of  Awakening  in  theCongregation.  Thurfday,  he  returned 
home,  exceedingly  fatigued  and  fpent ;  ftiil  in  the  fame  P>ame 
ofMortification  to  the  World, and  folicitous  fortheAdvancement 
of  Chrift's  Kingdom  :  And  on  this  Day  he  fays  thus^  '*  I  have 
*«  felt,  this  Week,  more  of  the  Spirit  of  a  P/V|-r//n  ««  Earthy 
«'  than  perhaps  ever  before  ;  And  yet  fo  defirous  to  fee  Zion's 
*'  Profperity,  that  I  was  not  fo  willing  to  leave  this  Scene  of 
*'  Sorrow  as  I  ufed  to  be.*'—-  The  two  remaining  Days  of  the 
Week,  he  was  very  ill,  and  cries  out'of  Wandrings,  Dulnefs, 
and  want  of  fpiritual  Fervency  and  Sweetnefs.  On  the  Sabbath, 
He  was  confined^1)y  Illnefs,  not  able  to  go  out  to  preach.  After 
this,  his  Illnefs  increafed  upon  him,  and  he  continued  very  ill 
all  the  Week  ;  *  and  fays,  that  "  he  thought  he  never  before 
*'  endured  fuch  a  Seafon  of  diftreffingWeaknefs  j  and  that  his 
•^'  Nature  was  fo  fpent,  that  he  could  neither  fland,  fit,  nor  lie 
*'  with  any  Quiet  ;  and  that  he  was  exercifed  with  extream 
^'  Faintnefs  and  Sickncfs  at  his  Stomach;  and  that  his  Mind 
*'  was  as  much  diforder'd  as  his  Body,  fecming  to  be  ftupid, 
*'  and  without  all  kind  of  AfFeftions  towards  allObjedsj  and 
*^'  yet  perplexed,  to  think,  that  he  lived  for  nothing,  that  preci- 


i  See  Mr.  Brainerd's  Narrative  at  the  End  of  his  Ordinaticn 

Sermon^  Page  34. 
'■^  This  Week,  on  Tuefday,  he  wrote  the  4th  LttUr  added 

2t  the  Eiid  of  thisAccouRt, 

•  CU?) 


X24     /^/.  2;:  2/&<?LIFE 

««  ousTime  roH'd  away,  and  he  could  do  nothing  but  trifle  : 
'*'  And  fpeaks  of  it  as  a  Seafon  wherein  Satan  bufFeted  him  with 
'*  fome  peculiar  Temptations."— Concerning  the  next  five 
Days  he  writes  thus,  "  OnLord*s-Day  ylug.  5.  Was  ftillvery 
«'  poor.  But,  tho*  very  weak,  1  vifited  and  preach'd  to  the 
<'  poor  Indians  twice,  and  was  ftrengthen'd  vaftly  beyond  my 
*'  Expectations.  And  indeed,  the  Lord  gave  me  fome  Frce- 
*'  dom  and  Fervency  in  addreifing  them  ;  tho'  I  had  not 
«''  Strength  enough  to  ftand,  but  was  obliged  to  fit  down  the 
««  wholeTime  ;  TowardsNight, was  extreamly  weak, faintjfick 
««  and  full  ofPain.  And  thus  I  have  continued  much  in  the  fame 
*«  Statethat  I  was  in  laft Week, through  the  moft  of  this(it  being 
«*  now  Friday  5  )  unable  to  engage  in  anvBufinefs;  frequently 
*«  unable  to  pray  in  the  Family.  lam  obliged  to  let  all  my 
*'  Thoughjs  and  Concerns  run  atRandom  ;  for  I  have  neither 
«'  Strength  to  read, meditate,  or  pray  :  And  this  naturally  per- 
"  plexes  my  Mind.  1  feem  to  my  felf  like  a  Man  that  has  all 
"  his  Eftate  embarqued  in  one  fmall  Boat,  unhappily  going 
««  adrift,  down  a  fwift  Torrent.  The^poor  Owner  ftands  on 
<«  the  Shore,  and  looks,  and  laments  his  Lofs.  — But  alas,  tho' 
*'  my  all  feems  to  be  adrift,  and  I  ftand  and  fee  it,  I  dare  not 
"  lament;  for  this  fmks  my  Spirits  more,  and  aggravates  my 
<■'-  bodih  Diforders  !  lam  forced  therefore  to  divert  my  felf 
«<  withTfifles ;  altho'  at  the  fameTimel  am  afraid,  and  after 
*'  feel  as  if  1  was  guilty  of  the  Mifimprovement  of  Time.  And 
'«  oftentimes  my  Confcience  is  fo  exercifediwith  this  miferable 
"  Way  of  fpending  Time,  that  1  have  no  Peace  ;  tho'  I  have 
*f  no  Strength  of  MindorBody  to  improve  it  to  betterPurpofe. 
s'  O  that  God  would  pity  my  diitrefled  State. 

The  next  three  Weeks  after  this,  his  Illnefs  was  not  ^o  ex- 
tfeme  :  He  was  in  fome  Degree  capable  of  Bufinefs,  both  pub- 
lick  and  private  ;  (  ahho  he  had  fome  Turns  wherein  his  Indif- 
pofition  prevailed  to  a  great  Degree  :  )  He  alfo  in  this  Space 
had,  for  the  moft  Part,  much  more  inward  Afliftance,  and 
Strengthof  Mind  :  He  often  expreflcs  great  Longings  for  the 
Enlargement  of  Chrilt's  Kingdom  ;  efpecially  by  the  Conver- 
fion  of  the  Heathen  to  God  :  He  fpeaks  of  his  Hope  of  this  as 
all  his  Deligkt  and  Joy.  He  continues  ftill  to  exprefs  hisufual 
Longings  after  Holinefs  and  living  to  God,  and  his  Senfe  of  his 
own  Unworthinefs :  He  feveral  Times  fpeaks  of  his  appearing 
to  himfelf  the  vilefl  Creature  on  Earth  ;  and  once  fays,  that  he 
verily  tho't  there  were  none  of  God's  Children  who  fellfo  far 
fiiort  of  that  Holinefs,  and  Perfij^iw  in  their  Obedience^ which 

God 


tf  Mr.  David  Brawicrd.    A.D.  1 744:     1 2  5 

God  requires,  as  he.  He  fpeaks  of  his  feeling  more  dead  than 
ever  to  the  Enjoyments  of  the  World.  He  fometimes  mentioivs 
fpecial  AlTiftancc  that  he  had  in  this  Space  ofTime,  in  preachin» 
to  the  Indians^  and  of  Appearances  of  religiousConcern  among 
them.  He  fpeaks  alfo  ofAffiftance  in  Prayer  for  abfent Friends 
and  cfpecially  Minifters  and  Candidates  for  tha  Miniftry  ;  and 
of  much  Comfort  he  enjoy 'd  in  the  Company  of  fomeMinifters 
that  came  to  vifit  him.  ] 

Saturday,  Sept,  i.  Wasfo  far  ftrengthen'd,  after  a  Seafon  of 
great  Weaknefs,  that  I  was  able  to  fpend  two  or  three  Hours  in 
writing  on  a  divine  Subjedl.  Enjoy'd  fomeComfort  andSweet- 
ncfs  in  Things  divine  and  facred  .-  And  as  my  bodily  Strength 
was  in  feme  Meafure  reftored,  fo  my  Soul  feem*d  to  be  fome- 
what  vigorous,  and  engaged  in  the  Things  of  God. 

Lords-Day,  Sept.  2.  Was  enabled  to  fpeakto  my  poorJndiafis 
with  much  Concern  and  Fervency  ;  and  lam  perfwaded,  God 
enabled  me  to  exercifeFaith  in  him,whilelvvasfpeaking  tothem. 
I  perceived,  thatfome  of  them  were  afraid  to  hearken  to,  and 
embrace  Chrijiianiiy^  left  they  fhould  be  inchanted  and  poifon'd 
hy  fome  of  the  Powcws  :  But  I  was  enabled  to  plead  with  them 
not  to  fear  thefe  ;  and  confiding  in  God  for  Safety  andDeliver- 
ance,  I  bid  a  Challenge  to  all  thefe  Powers  of  Darbie/s,  to  do 
their  worft  upon  me  firft :  I  told  my  People,  I  was  a  Chrjji'wn^ 
and  afk'd  them  why  the  Powows  did  not  Bewitch  and  Poifon 
me.  I  fcarcely  ever  felt  more  fcnfible  of  my  ownUnworthinefs, 
than  in  this  Ailion  ;  I  faw,  that  the  Honour  of  God  was  con- 
cerned in  the  AfFair  ;  and  I  defired  to  be  preferved,  not  from 
felfifh  Views,  but  for  a  Teftimony  of  the  divine  Power  and 
Goodnefs,  and  of  theTruth  ofChriftianity,  and  that  God  might 
be  glorified.  Afterwards,  I  found  my  Soul  rejoice  in  God  for 
his  ailifting  Grace. 

[  After  this,  he  went  a  Journey  into  New- England^  and  was 
abfent  from  the  Place  of  his  Abode,  at  the  Forks  of  Delawarty 
about  three  Weeks,  rfe  was  in  a  feeble  State  thegrea{er  Pait 
of  the  Time.  But  in  the  latter  Part  of  the  Journey,  he  found 
he  ^gained  much  in  Health  and  Strength.  And  as  to  the  State 
of  his  Mind, and  his  religious  and  fpiritualExercifesjit  was  much 
With  him  as  had  been  before  ufual  in  Journeys ;  excepting  that 
thcFrame  of  hisMind  fcemed  more  generally  to  be  comfortable. 
But  yet  there  are  Complaints  of  fome  uncomfortable  Sesfons, 
want  of  Fervency,  and  want  of  Retirements,  and  Time  alons 
with  God.  In  this  Journey,  he  did  not  forget  the  Indi&ns  ; 
bdt  once  and  again  fpeaks  of  his  longing  for  their  Convarfion.  J 


126  ^L  27  irJ(?  LIFE 

Wednefday,  Sept,  26.  Rode  Home,to  theForks  oWehwan, 
What  Reafon  have  I  to  blefsGod,  who  has  preferved  me  in  rid- 
ing more  than  420  Miles,  and  has  kept  all  my  Bones^  that  not  one 
cfthem  has  been%roken  !  MyHealth  likewife  is  greatly  rccover'd. 

0  that  I  could  dedicate  my  all  to  God  :  This  is  all  the  Return 

1  can  make  to  him. 

Thurfday,  Sept,  27.  Was  fomething  melarcholy  :  Had  not 
much  Freedom  and  Comfort  in  Prayer :  My  Soul  is  difconfo- 
jate,  when  God  is  withdrawn. 

Friday,  Sept,  28.  Spent  the  Day  in  Prayer,  Reading,  and 
Writing.  Felt  fomcfm  all  Degree  of  warmth  inPrayer,and  fome 
Defires  of  the  Enlargement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  by  the  Con- 
verfron  of  the  Heathen,  and  that  God  would  make  me  a  chofen 
Fejfely  to  bear  his  Name  before  them :  Longed  for  Grace  to  ena- 
ble me  to  be  faithful. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  vhe  fame  Longings  for  the  Ad- 
vancement of  Chrifi's  Kingdom,  and  the  Converfion  of  the  In- 
dkns  ;  but  complains  greatly  of  the  ill  EfFedis  of  theDiverfions 
of  his  late  Journey,  as  unfixing  his  Mind  from  that  Degree  of 
Engagednefs,  Fervency,  Watchfulnefs,  k^c,  which  he  enjoyed 
before.     And  the  like  Complaints  are  continued  the  pextDay.] 

Monday,  O^ob,  1.  Was  engaged  this  Day  in  makingPrepa- 
ration  for  my  intended  Journey  xoSufquahannah  :  Withdrew  fe- 
veral  Times  to  the  Woods  for  fecret  Duties,  and  endeavoured 
to  plead  for  thedivinePrefenceto  go  with  me  to  the  poorPagans, 
to  whom  I  was  going  to  preach  the  Gofpel.  Towards  Night, 
rode  about  four  Miles,  and  met  Brother  Byram  ;  *  who  was 
come,at  myDefire,  tobemyCompanion  inTravel  toihelndians^ 
I  rejoiced  to  fee  him  ;  and,  I  truft,God  made  his  Converfation 
profitable  to  me  ;  I  faw  him,  as  I  thought,  more  dead  to  the 
World,  it*s  anxious  Cares,  and  alluring  Ob>6ls,  than  I  was  : 
and  tltis  made  me  look  within  my  felf,  and  gave  me  a  greater 
SenfeofmyGuilt,  Ingratitude,  and  Mifery. 

Tuefday,  OSfob.  2.  Set  out  on  my  Journey,  in  Company 
with  dear  Brother  Byram^  and  my  Interpreter,  and  two  chief 
Indians  from  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  Travelled  about  25  Miles 
and  lodged  in  one  of  thelaft  Houfes  on  our  Road  ;  after  which 
there  was  nothing  but  a  hideous  and  howling  WiUernefs, 


*  Minifter  at  a  Place  called  RaMtkus^  about  40  Miles  from 
Mr.  Br  diner  dU  Lodgings, 

Wcdn^lday^ 


r/Mf.  David  Bramerd.        A.D.1744:   Y27 

Wednefday,   Oaob,  3.     We  went  on  our  Way  into  the 
Wildernefs,  and  found  the  moft  difficult  and  dangerous  travel- 
Jing,  by  far,  that  ever  any  of  us  had  {^zn  5  we  had  fcarce  any 
Thing  elfe  but  loftyMountains,  deepValleys,and  hideousRocks 
to  make  our  Way  thro'.     However,  I  felt  fome  Sweetnefs  in 
divineThings,  part  of  the  Day,  and  had  my  Mind  intenfely  cn«* 
gaged  in  Meditation  on  a  divine  Subject,     Near  Night,  my 
Beaft  that  I  rode  upon,  hung  one  of  her  Legs  in  the  Rocks,'  and 
fell  down  under  me  ;  But  thro'  divineGoodnefs,  I  was  not  hurt. 
However,  fhe  broke  herLeg  ;  and  being  in  fuch  a  hideous  Place, 
and  near  30  Miles  from  any  Houfe,  I  faw  nothing  that  could  be 
done  to  preferve  her  Life,  and  fo  was  obliged  to  kill  her,  and  to 
profecute  my  Journey  on  Foot.     This  Accident  made  me  ad- 
mire the  divineGoodnefs  to  me,  that  my  Bones  were  not  broken, 
and  the  Multitude  of  'em  fill'd  with  ftrong  Pain.  Juft  at  Dark, 
we  kindled  a  Fire, cut  up  a  few  Bufhes,  and  made  a  Shelter  over 
our  Heads,  to  {blsq  us  from  the  Froft,  which  was  very  hard  that 
Night ;  and  committing  our  felves  to  God  by  Prayer,  we  lay 
down  on  the  Ground,  and  flept  quietly- 

[  The  next  Day,  they  went  forward  on  their  Journey,  and  at 
Night  toolc  up  their  Lodging  in  the  Woods  in  like  Manner.] 

Friday,  OHoh.  5.  We  arrived  at  Sufquabannah  River,  at  a 
Place  called  Opeholhaupung  f :  Found  there  12  Indian  Houfes  r. 
After  I  had  faluted  the  King  in  a  friendly  Manner,  I  told  him. 
my  Bufinefs,  and  that  my  Defire  was  to  teach  themCbn/iiamiy. 
After  fome  Confultation,  the  Indians  gathered,  and  I  preach'd 
to  'em.  And  when  I  had  done,  I  afked,  if  they  would  hear  me 
again.  They  reply 'd,  that  they  would  confider  of  it  5  and  fooa 
after  fent  me  Word,  that  they  would  immediately  attend,  if  I 
would  preach  :  Which  I  did,  withFreedom,bothTimes.  When 
I  afked  'em  again,  whether  they  would  hear  me  further,  they 
reply 'd,  they  would  the  next  Day.  I  was  exceeding  fenfible  of 
the  ImpofTibility  of  doing  any  Thing  for  the  poor  Heathen  with- 
out fpecial  Affiftance  from  above  :  And  my  Soul  feem'd  to  refl 
on  God,  and  leave  it  to  him  to  do  as  he  pleafed  in  that  which  I 
faw  was  his  own  Caufe  :  And  indeed,  thro*  divine  Goodnefs,  I 
had  felt  fomething  of  this  Frame  moft  of  the  Time  while  I  was 
travelling  thither  j  and  in  fome  Meafure  before  I  fet  out. 


t  See  hkNarrativ(  at  theEnd  of  his  Ord,  Strmon  Pag.  35»  3^- 
S  ■  '  ■  Saturday, 


^28      Ml  if.  !ratfLIFE  ^    -^ 

Saturday,  OSioh*  6.  Rofe  early,  and  befoOght  the  Lord  fo? 
Help  in  my  great  Work;  Near  Noon,  preach'd  again  to  the 
Indians  :  And  in  the  Afternoon,  vifited  them  from  Houfe  to 
Houfe,  and  invited  them  to  come  and  hear  me  again  the  next 
Day,  and  put  off  their  hunting  Defign,  which  they  were  juft  cn- 
tring  upon,  'till  Monday.  This  Nighty  I  truft,  the  Lord  flood  by 
me  to  encourage  and  ftrengthen  my  Soul :  I  fpent  more  than  an 
Hour  in  fecret  Retirement ;  was  enabled  to  pour  out  my  Mean 
lefore  God^  for  the  Increafe  of  Grace  in  ray  Soul,  for  Minifle- 
rial  Endowments,  for  Succefs  among  the  poor  IndianSyiot  God's 
Minifters  and  People,  and  for  dear  Friends  vaftly  diftant,  t^c* 
BlefTed  me  God. 

[  The  next  Day, he  complains  of  great  want  of  Fixednefs  and 
Intenfenefsin  Religion,  fo  that  he  could  not  keep  any  fpiritual 
Thought  one  Minute  without  Diftradlion  ;  which  occafion'd 
Anguifh  of  Spirit.  He  felt  (he  fays)  amazingly  Guilty ^  andex* 
iremely  Miferahle  ;  and  cries  out,  "  Oh  my  Soul,  what  Death 
*'  it  \^^  to  have  the  Affections  unable  to  center  in  God,  byRea- 
*'  fon  of  Darknefsjand  confequently  roving  after  thatSatisfa6lioii 
*'  elfe where,  that  is  only  to  be  found  here  !"  However,  he 
preach'd  twice  to  the  Indians  with  fome  Freedom  and  Power  : 
But  was  afterwards  damp'd  by  the  Ohjeiiions  they  made  againfl 
Chrijiianity,  In  the  Evening,  in  a  Senfe  of  his  great  Defeats  in 
Preaching,  he  intreated  God  not  to  impute  to  him  Blood- Guiitinefs  j 
but  yet  W3S  at  the  fame  Time  enabled  to  rejoyce  in  God,'] 

Monday,  O^oh.  8.  Vifited  the  Indiam  with  a  Dcfign  to  take 
my  Leave  of  themjfuppofuig  they  would  this  Morning  go  out  to 
Hunting  early  j  but  beyond  my  Expedation  and  Hope,  they 
defired  to  hear  me  preach  aaain.  I  gladly  complied  ^j.ith  their 
Requcfl,  and  afterwards  endeavoured  to  anfwer  their  Ohje^ions 
againft  Cbriflianity.  Then  they  went  away  ;  and  we  fpent  the 
left  of  the  Afternoon  in  Reading  and  Prayer,  intending  to  go 
Home- ward  very  early  the  next  Day.  My  Soul  was  in  fome 
Meafure  rcfrefli'd  in  fecret  Prayer  and  Meditation.  BlefTed  be 
the  Lord  for  all  his  Goodnefs. 

Tuefday,  C?^i)^.  r).  We  rofe  tbout  4  in  the  Morning,  and 
commending  our  felves  to  God  by  Prayer,  and  afking  his  fpccial 
Proted^ion,  we  fee  out  on  our  Journey  homewards  about  5.  and 
travelled  with  great  i^eadinefs  'till  paft  6  at  Night.  And  then 
made  us  aFirCjand  aSholter  of  Barks,  and  fo  refted.  I  had  fome 
clear  and  comfortable  Thoughts  on  a  divine  Subjedljby  the  Way, 
towards  Night.— -  In  the  Night,  the  Wolves  howi'd  around  us  ; 
but  God  preitrved  U5. 

[  The 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 744.     1 29 

[  The  next  Day,  they  rofe  early,  and  fet  forward,  and  fra- 
vcUefl  that  Day,  'till  they  came  to  an  Ir'ijh  Settlement,  where 
Mr.  Brainerd  was  acquainted,  and  lodged  there.  He  fpeaks  of 
IbmeSweetnefs  in  divineThings,  andThankfulnefs  toGod  for  his 
Goodnefs  to  him  in  this  Journey,  that  he  felt  in  his  Heart  in  the 
Evening,  tho'  attended  with  Shame  for  his  Barrennefs,  On 
Thurfday,  he  continued  in  the  fame  Place;  and  he  and  Mr. 
Byram  preached  there  to  the  People.] 

Friday,  OSfob.  12.  Rode  Home  to  my  Lodging  J  where  I 
poured  out  my  Soul  to  God  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  endeavoured 
to  blefs  him  for  his  abundantGoodnefs  tome  in  my  )ate Journey. 
I  fcarce  ever  enjoyed  moreHealth  ;  at  Icaft,  of  later  Years  5  And 
(Sod  marvclloufly,  and  almoft  miraculouily,  fupported  me  under 
theFatigues  of  the  Way,  and  Travelling  onFoot.  BlefTed  be  the 
Lord,  that  continually  preferves  me  in  all  my  Ways. 

[  On  Saturday,   he  went  again   to  the  Irijh  Settlement,  to 
fpend  the  Sabbath  there,  his  Indians  being  gone.] 

.Lord*s-Day,  0^5^.  14.     Was  much  confufed  and  perplexed 
in  ray  Thoughts  ;  could  not  pray  ;  and  was  almoft  difcouraged, 
thinking  Ifliouid  never  be  able  to  preach  any  more.     But  after- 
wards, God   was  pleafed  to  give   me' fome  Relief  from  thefe 
Confufions  :  But  ftill  I  was  afraid,  and  even  trembled  before 
God.     1  went  to  the  Place  of  publick  Worfhip,  lifting  up  my 
Heart  to  God  for  Afliftance  and  Grace,   in  my  great  Work  : 
And  God  was  gracious  to  me,  and  helped  me  to  plead  with  him 
for  Holinefsjand  to  ufe  the  ftrongeft  Arguments  with  Wm, drawn 
from  the  Incarnation  and  Sufferings  of  Chrift  for  th<s  very  End, 
that  Men  might  be  made  holy.   Afterwards,  I  was  much  afTifted 
in  preaching.     I  know  not  that  ever  God  helped  me  to  preach 
in  a  more  dofe  and  diftinguifhingManner  for  theTrial  of  Men's 
State.     Thro'  the  infinite  Goodnefs  of  God,!  felt  what  I  fpakc  ; 
and  God  enabled  me  to  treat  on  divine  Truth  with  uncommon 
Clearnefs  :  And  yet  I  was  fo  fenfible  of  myDefeds  inPreaching, 
that  I  could  not  be  proud  of  myPerformanve,  as  at  fome  Times ; 
And  blefTed  be   the  Lord  for  this  Mercy.     In  the  Evening,  I 
long*d  to  be  entirely  abne,  to  blefs  God   for  Help  in  a  Time  of 
Extremity  5  and  longed  for  great  Degrees  of  Hoiinefs,  that  I 
might  ftiew  my  Gratitude  to  God. 

\  [  The  next  Morning,  he  fpcnt  fome  Time  before  Sun-rife  in 
Prayer,  in  the  fame  fweet  and  grateful  Frame  of  Mind,  that  he 
k^ad  been  in  the  Evening  before  :  And  afterwards  went  to  hli 
Indians i  and  fpent  fome  Time  in  teaching  and  exhorting  them.] 
\.  S  2  Tuefday, 


130    Ml  if.  Th  LIFE 

Tuefday,  O^ob.  1 6.  Felt  a  Spirit  of  Solemnity  and  Watch- 
fulnefs ;  was  afraid  I  fliould  not  live  to  and  upon  God  :  Longed 
for  more  Intenfenefs  and  Spirituality.  Spent  the  Day  in  Writ- 
ing ;  frequently  lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God  for  more  Heavcnly- 
mindednefs.  In  the  Evening,enjoyed  fweet  Afliflance  in  Prayer, 
and  thirfted  and  pleaded  to  be  as  holy  as  the  blefled  Jn^els  : 
Longed  for  Minifterial  Gifts  and  Graces,  and  Succefs  in  my 
Work  :  Was  fweetly  affifted  in  the  Duty  of  Interceffion,  and 
enabled  to  remember  and  plead  for  Numbers  of  dear  Friends, 
and  Chrift's  Minifters. 

[He  feemed  to  have  much  of  the  fame  Frame  of  Mind,  the 
two  next  Days.] 

Friday,  O^ob,  ig.  Felt  an  abafing  Senfe  of  my  own  Impu- 
rity and  Unholinefs ;  and  felt  my  Soul  melt  and  mourn,  that  I 
had  abufed  and  grieved  a  very  gracious  God,  who  was  ftill  kind 
to  me,  notvviihftanding  all  my  Unworthinefs.  My  Soul  en- 
joyed a  fweet  Seafon  of  bitter  Repentance  and  Sorrow,  that  I 
had  wronged  that  blefTed  God,  who  ( I  was  perfwaded  )  was 
reconciled  to  me  in  his  dear  Son.  My  Soul  was  now  tender, 
devout,  and  folemn.  And  I  was  afraid  of  nothing,  but  Sin  j 
and  afraid  of ihat  in  every  A6lion  and  Thought. 

[The  four  nextDays,were  manifef^ly  fpent  in  a  moft  conftant 
Tendernefs,VVatchfulnefs, Diligence  and  Self- Diffidence.  But 
he  complains  ofWandrings  of  Mind, Languor  of  AiFedlions  ^^] 

Wednefday,  Octob,  24.  Near  Noon,  rode  to  my  People  ; 
fpent  fume  Time,  and  pray'd  with  them  :  Felt  the  Frame  of  a 
Pilgrim  on  Earth  ;  longed  much  to  1-^ave  this  gloomy  Manfion  ; 
but  yet  found  the  Exercife  of  Patience  and  Refignation.  And  as 
I  returned  home  from  the  Indians^  fpent  the  whole  Time  in 
lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God,  In  the  Evening,  enjoy 'd  a  blefTed 
Seafonalone  in  Prayer  ;  was  enabled  to  cry  toGod  with  aChild- 
like  Spirit,  for  the  Space  of  near  an  Hour:  Enjoyed  a  fweet 
Freedom  in  fupplicating  for  my  felf,  for  dearFriends,Minifler5, 
and  fome  who  are  preparing  for  that  Work,  and  for  the 
Church  of  God  ;  and  longed  to  be  as  lively  my  felf  in  God's 
.Service  as  the  Jngels, 

Thurfday,  Octob.  25.  Was  bufy  in  Writing.  Was  very 
fenfib'e  of  my  abfolutcDcpendance  on  God  in  allRefpe£ls  ;  faw 
that  I  could  do  nothing  in  thofe  Affairs, that  I  have  fufficient  na- 
turalKacultiesforjUnlefsGcd  fhould  fmile  upon  myAttempt.  No\ 
that  weare [ufficunt  c[  our  felvei^  to  think  anyThlng^ai  of  ourfeivss -, 
ift'as  n  facred  Text  that  I  law  the  Truth  of. 

Fridajv 


e/  Mr,  David  Bralnerd.     A.D.  1 744.    13 1 

Friday,  Octob,  26.  In  the  Morning,  my  Soul  was  melted 
with  a  Senfe  of  divine  Goodnefs  and  Mercy  to  fuch  a  vile  un- 
worthy Worm  as  I  :  Delighted  to  lean  upon  God, and  place  my 
whole  Truft  in  him  :  My  Soul  was  exceedingly  grieved  for 
Sin,  and  prized  and  longed  afterHolinefs  ;  it  wounded  myHeart 
deeply,  yet  fweetly,  to  think  how  I  had  abufed  a  kind  God. 
I  longed  to  be  perfedlly  Holyjthat  I  might  not  grieve  a  gracious 
G06  i  who  will  continue  to  love,  notwithftanding  his  Love  is 
abufed  :  I  longed  for  Holinefs  more  for  this  End,  than  I  did  for 
my  own  Happinefs  fake  :  And  yet  this  was  my  greateft  Happi- 
ncfs,  never  more  to  difhonour,  but  always  to  glorify  the  bleffed 
God.     Afterwards,rode  up  to  the  Indiansy  in  theAftemoonj^r. 

[  The  four  next  Days,  he  was  exercifed  with  much  Diforder 
andPain  of  Body,  with  a  Degree  of  Melancholy  andGloominefs 
of  Mind, bitterly  complaining  of  Deadnefs  andUnproiitablenefa, 
yet  mourning  and  longing  after  God.  j 

Wednefday,  Octob,  31.  Was  fenfibl^  of  my  Barrennefs,  and 
Decays,  in  theThings  of  God  ;  My  Soul  fail'd,  when  I  remein- 
ber*d  the  Fervency  I  had  enjoyed  at  .the  Throne  of  Grace. 
Oh  (I  thought)  If  I  could  but  befpiiitual,  warm>  heavenly- 
minded,  and  afFedionately  breathing,' after  God,  this  would  be 
better  thanLife  to  me  !  My  Soul  longed  exceedingly  forDeath, 
to  be  loofed  from  this  Dullnefs  andBarrennefs,and  made  forever 
adtlve  in  the  Service  of  God.  I  feemed  to  Wvt  for  nothing,  and 
to  do  no  Good  :  And  Oh,  the  Burden  of  fuch  a  Life  I  Ob, 
Death,  Death,  my  kind  Friend, haften  and  deliver  me  from  dull 
Mortality,  and  make  me  fpiritual  and  vigorous  to  Eternity. 

Thurfday,  November  i.  Had  buft  little  Sweetnefjs  in  divine 
Things.  But  afterwards,  in  the  Evening,  felt  fome  Life,  and 
Longings  afterGod  ;  I  longed  to  be  always  folemn, devout,  and 
heavenly-minded  5  &  was  afraid  to  leave  offpraying,left  I  fhould 
again  lofe  a  Senfe  of  the  fweet  Things  of  God. 

Friday,  Nov,  2.  Was  fiil'd  /with  Sorrow  and  Confufion,  in 
the  Morning,  and  could  enjoy  ^o  fweet  Senfe  of  divine  Things, 
nor  get  any  Relief  in  Prayer.  Saw  I  deferved,  that  every  one  of 
God's  Creatures  fhould  be  letloofe  upon  me  to  be  theExccutio- 
ners  of  his  Wrath  againft  me  :  And  yet  therein  I  faw  I  deferved 
what  I  did  not  fear  as  my  Portion.  About  Noon,  rode  up  to 
the  IfJians ;  and  while  going,  could  feel  no  De/ires  for  them, 
gnd  even  dreaded  to  fay  any  Thing  to  'em  ;  but  God  was 
pleafed  to  give  me  fome  Freedom  and  Enlargement,  and  made^ 

the 


f^i      JELif.  The   LIFE 

the  S^afon  comfortabje  to  me.  In  the  Evening,hadEnlargement 
in  Prayer.  But  alas,  what  Comforts  and  Enlargements  I  have 
felt  for  thefe  many  Weeks  paft,  have  been  only  tranfient  &  (hort  5 
and  the  greater  Part  of  my  Time  has  been  fillM  up  with  Dead- 
nefs,  or  Struggles  with  Deadnefs,  and  bitter  Conflids  with  Cor- 
ruption. I  have  found  my  felf  exercifed  forely  with  fome  parti- 
cular Things  that  I  thought  my  felf  moft  of  all  freed  from.  And 
thus  I  have  ever  found  it,  when  I  have  tho't  theBattle  was  over, 
and  the  Conqueft  gained,  and  fo  let  djawn  my  Watch,  the  Ene- 
my has  rifcn  up  and  done  me   the  greateft  Injury. 

Saturday,  Nov.  3.  I  read  the  Life  andTrials  of  a  godlyMan, 
and  was  much  warm'd  by  it  :  I  wondered  at  my  paftDeadnefs ; 
and  was  more  convinced  of  it,  than  ever.  Was  enabled  to 
confefs  and  bewail  my  Sin  before  God,  with  Self-abhorrence. 

Lord's-Day,  Nov,/\..  Had,  I  think,  fome  Exercife  of  Faith 
in  Prayer,  in  the  Morning  :  Long'd  to  be  Spiritual.  Had  con- 
fiderableHelp  in  preaching  to  my  poovlndians :  Was  encouraged 
with  them,  and  hoped  that  God  defigned  Mercy  for  them. 

[  The  next  Day»  t  He  fet  out  on  a  Journey  to  New-Tor k^  to 
the  Meeting  of  the  Prejbytery  there  ;  and  was  gone  from  Home 
more  than  a  Fortnight.  He  feem'd  to  enter  on  this  Journey 
v/ith  great  Reludance ;  fearing,  that  the  Diverfions  of  it  would 
prove  a  Means  of  cooling  his  religiousA{Fe6lions,ashe  had  found 
in  other  Journeys.  But  yet,  in  this  Journey  he  had  fome  fpecial 
Seafons  wherein  he  enjoyed  extraordinary  Evidences  and  Fruits 
of  God's  graciousPrefence.  He  was  greatly  fatigued  andexpofed 
in  this  Journey  by  Cold  and  Storms ;  And  when  he  returned 
from  New-Tor k  to  New-Jerjey^  on  Friday,  w^as  taken  very  ill, 
'and  was  detained  by  his  Ulnefs  fome  Time.] 

Wednefday,  Nov.  21.  Rode  from  Newark  to  Rockciticus  in 
the  Cold,  and  was  almoft  overcome  with  it.  Enjoyed  fome 
Swectnefs  in  Converfation  with  dear  Mr.  Jones,  while  I  dined 
with  him  :  My  Soul  loves  the  People  of  God,  and  efpecially  the 
Minifters  of  Jefus  Chrift,  who  feel  the  fame  Trials  that  I  do. 

Thurfday,  Nov.  22.  Came  on  my  Way  from  Rockciticus  to 
Delaware  River.  Was  very  much  difordered  with  a  CcJd  and 
Pain  in  my  Head.     About  6  at  Night,  I  loft  my  Way  in  the 


f  On  this  Day  he  concluded  his  Narrative^  that  is  at  the 
End  of  his  Ordination  Sfrmon* 
t  Wildernefs^' 


i/ Mr.  David  Braincfd.     ■A.D.1744;      jVn 

Wilderncfs,  and  wandered  over  Rocks  and  Mouhtains,  dov^ 
hideousSteeps,  thro'  Swamps,  and  moft  dreadful  and  dangerous 
Places ;  And  the  Night  being  dark,  fo  that  few  Stars  could  be 
feen,  I  was  greatly  expofed  ;  Was  much'  pinch'd   with  Cold, 
and  diftrefs'd  with  an  extream  Patn  in  my  Head,  attended  with 
Sicknefs  at  my  Stomach  ;  fo  that  every  Step  I  took  was  diftrcf- 
fmg  to  me.     I  had  little  Hope  for  feveral  Hours  together,  but 
that  I  mutt  lie  out  in  the  Woods  all  Night,  in  this  diftrefled 
Cafe.     But  about  9  o'Clock,  I  found  a  Houfe,  thro*  the  abun- 
dantGbodnefs  of  God,  and  was  kindly  entertained.  Thus  I  have 
frequently  been  expofed,  &  fometimeslain  out  the  whole  Night : 
but  God  has   hitherto  preferved  me  ;  and  blefTed  be  his  Name. 
Such  Fatigues  and  Hardftiips  as  thefe   ferve  to  wean  me  more 
from  the  Earth  ;  and,  Itruft,  will  make-Heaven  the  fweeter. 
Formerly,  when  I  was  thus  expofed  to  Cold,   Rain-,  (sf^ .  I  was 
ready  to  pleafe  my  felf  with  the  Thoughts  of  erjoyW?/t>in- 
fortable  Houfe,  a  warm  Fire,  and   other   outward   COTnfprts; 
but  now  thefe  have  lefs   Place  in  my  Heart  ( thro'  the  Grace  of 
God  )  and  my  Eye  is  more  to  God  for  Comfort.     In  this  World 
I  expe6l  Tribulation  ;   and  it  does  not  now,  as  formerly,  appear 
ftrange  to  me  ;  I  don't  in  fuch  Seafons  of  Difficulty  flatter  my 
felf  that  it  will  be  better  hereafter  ;  but  rather  think, how  much 
Worfe  it  might  be ;  how  much  greater  Trials  others  of  God'ii 
Children  have  endured  ;     and  how    much  greater  are  yet  per> 
haps  referved  for  me.     Bleffed   be  God,   that  he  makes  the 
Thoughts  of  my  Journey's  End  and  of  my  Diflblution  a  great 
Comfort  to  me, under  my  (harpeftTrials  ;  &  fcarce  ever  lets  thefe   ^ 
Tnoughts  be  attended  with  Terror  or  Melancholy  ;  but  thcy.> 
are  attended  frequently  with  great  Joy.  ^ 

Friday,  Nov.  23.  Vifited  a  fick  Man  ;  difcourfed  and  pray'd 
with  him.  Then  vifued  another  Houfe,  where  was  one  dead  and 
laid  out  ;  look'd  on  the  Corps,  and  loaged  that  my  Time  mightf 
come  to  depart,  that  I  might  be  with  Chri/i,  Then  went  home 
to  my  Lodgings,  about  one  o'Clock.  Felt  poorly  ;  but  was 
able  to  read,  moftcf  the  Alternoon. 

[  Within  the  Space  of  the  next  twelve  Days,  he  pafTed  under 
many  Changes  in  the  Frames  and  Exercifes  oi  his  Mind.  He  had 
many  Seafons  of  the  fpecial  influences  of  God's  Spirit,  animat- 
ing, invigorating,  and  comforting  him  in  the  Wa /s  of  God  and 
Duties  of  Religion  ;  but  had  fome  Turns  of  great  Deje^iion 
and  Melancholy.  He  fpent  much  Tinae,  within  this  Space,  in 
haid  Labour,  with  others,  to  make  for  himfelf  a  little  Cott?ga^ 


134     -^/.  27;  5"^^  LIFE 

or  Hut, to  live  in  by  himfelf  thro'  the.Winter.  Yet  he  frequently 
preached  to  ihtlndians ^k.  fpeaks  of  fpecial  Afliftance  hchad  from 
Time  to  Time,  in  addrefling  himfelf  to  them  ;  And  of  his  fomc'. 
times  having  confiderableEncouragement, from  theAttention  they 
gave.  But  onTuerdayZ)^^/'^^.4.  he  was  funk  into greatDifcou- 
ragement,  to  fee  'em  (  mofl  of  'em  )  going  in  Company  to  an 
idolatrous  Feaji  and  Dance^  after  he  had  taken  abundant  Pains 
with  them  to  diflwade  'em  from  thefe  Things.  ] 

Thurfday,  Decemb.  6.  Having  now  a  happy  Opportunity  of 
being  retired  in  a  Houfe  of  my  own,  which  I  have  lately  procur- 
ed and  moved  into,  and  confidering  that  it  is  now  along  Time 
fmce  I  have  been  able,  either  on  Account  of  bodily  Weaknefs, 
or  for  want  of  Retirement,  orfome  other  Difficulty,   to  fpend 
any  Time  in  fecret  Fafting  and  Prayer  ;  confidering  alfo  the 
greatnefsofmyWork,  and  the  extream  Difficulties  that  attend 
it :  And  that  my  poor  Indians  are  now  worjhipping  Devils^  not- 
withflanding  all  the  Pains  I  have  taken  with  them,  which  almoft 
overv^helms  my  Spirit  :  Moreover,  confidering  my  extremeBar- 
renncfs,    fpiritual  Deadnefs  and  Deje£lion,  of  late  ;  as  alfo  the 
Power  of  fome  particular  Corruptions  ;  1  fat  apart  this  Day  for 
fecret  Prayer  and  Fading,  to  implore  the  Bleffingof  God  on  my 
fclf,  on  nsy  poor  People,  on  my  Friends,  and  on  the  Church  of 
God.      At  firf^,  I  felt  a  great  Backwardnefs  to  the  Duties  of  the 
Day,  on  Account  of  the  feeming  Impoffibility  of  performing 
them:  But  the  Lord  helped  me    to  break  thro' this  Difficulty. 
God  was  pleafed,    by  the  Ufe  of  Means,  to  give  me  fome  clear 
.  Convi<Slion  of  my  Sinfulnefs,  and  a  Difcovcry  of   the  Plague  of 
%Tny  own  Heart,   more   affedling  than  what  I  have  of  late  had. 
And  efpecially  I  faw  my  Sinfulnefs  in  this,   tha/  when  God  had 
withdrawn  himfelf,  then,  inftead  of  living  and  dying  in  Purfuit 
of  him,  I  have  been  difpofed^to  one  of  thefe   two  Things  ;  ei- 
ther (  firft )  to  yield  an  unbecoming  Refpedt  to  fome  earthlyOb- 
jecSls,  as  if  Happinefs  were  to  be  derived  from  them  ;  or  (idly) 
to  be  fecretly  froward  and  impatient,  and  unfuitably  defirous  of 
Deaths  (0  that  (  have  fometimes  tho't  I  could  not  bear   to  think 
my  Life  muft  belengthen'd  out.     And  that  which  often  drove 
me  to  this  impatient  Defire  of  Death,  was  aDefpair  of  doing  any 
Good  in  Life  ;  and  I  chofe  Death,  rather  than  a  Life  fpent  for 
Nothing.     But  now  God  -made  me  fenfible  of  my  Srn  in  thefe 
Things,  and  enabled  me  to  cry   to  him  for  Forgivenefs,     Yet 
this  was  nor  all  [  wanted  ;  for   my  Soul  appeared  exceedingly 
vfpolluted,  my  Heart  feem'd  like  a  Neft  of  Vipers,  or  a  Cage  of 

unclean 


cf  Mr.  David  Brainerd;    A.D.174^^     i^| 

ijnclean  and  hateful  Birds  :  And  therefore  I  wanted  to  be  pu- 
rified by  the  Blood  of  Sprinklings  that  cUanfeth  from  all  Sin.  And 
this,  I  hopc,I  was  enabled  to  pray  for  inFaith.  I  enjoyed  much 
more  Intenfenefs,  Fervency,  andSpirituality,  than  I  expe^ed* 
God  was  better  to  me  than  my  Fears.  And  towards  Night* 
I  felt  my  Soul  rejoyce,  that  God  is  unchangeably  happy  and 
glorious  'y  that  he  will  be  glorified,  whatever  becomes  of  his 
Creatures.  I  was  enabled  to  perfevere  in  Prayer  'till  IbmeTime 
in  the  Evening  :  At  whichTime  1  faw  fo  muchNeed  of  divine 
Help,  in  every  Refpedl,  that  I  knew  not  how  to  leave  0%  and 
had  forgot  that  I  needed  Food.  This  Evening,  I  was  much 
ailifted  in  meditating  on  J/ai.  lii.  3.  BlelTed  be  the  Lord  for 
any  Help  in  the  paft  Day. 

Friday,  Decemb.  7.  Spent  fome  Time  in  Prayer,  in  the 
Morning  5  enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and  Affefiion  in  the  Duty, 
and  had  longing  Defires  of  being  made  faithful  to  the  Deaths 
Spent  a  little  Time  in  writing  on  a  divine  Subje6t :  Then 
vifited  the  Indians,  and  preach'd  to  'em.  But  under  inexpre:fii- 
h\Q  Dejedion :  1  had  no  Heart  to  fpeak  to  them,  and  could 
not  do  it,  but  as  I  forced  my  felf :  I  knew,  they  muft  hate  to 
hear  me,  as  having  but  jufl  got  Home  from  their  idolatrous 
Fcaft  and  Devil-Worfhip. —  In  the  Evening,  had  fome  Free- 
dom in  Prayer  and  Meditation. 

Saturday,  Decern.  8.  Have  been  uncommonly  free  this  Day 
from  Dejedion,  and  from  that  diftreffing  Apprehenfion,  that 
I  could  do  nothing  :  Was  enabled  to  pray  and  ftudy  with  fome 
Comfort ;  and  cfpecially  was  aflifted  in  writing  on  a  divine 
Subjedt.  In  the  Evening,  my  Soul  rejoyced  in  God  ;  and 
I  blefs*d  his  Name  for  fiiining  on  my  Soul.  O  the  fweet 
and  blefTed  Change  I  then  felt,  when  God  brought  mt  out  of 
Darknefs  into  his  marvellous  Light  ! 

Lord's-Day,  Decern.  9.  Preach'd,  both  Parts  of  the  Day, 
at  a  Place  call'd  Greenwich^  in  Neiv-Jerfey^  about  loMiles  from 
my  own  Houfe.  In  the  firft  Difcourfe  I  had  fcarce  any  Warmth^ 
or  afFe(Slionate  Longing  forSouls.  In  the  Intermifllon-Seafon  I 
got  alone  among  the  Bufhes,  and  cried  to  God  for  Pardon  of  my 
Deadnefs  ;  and  was  in  Anguifh  and  Bittemefs,  that  I  could  not 
addrcfs  Souls  with  more  Compailion  and  tender  AiFeftion  : 
Judged  and  condemned  my  felf  for  want  of  this  divineTemper  : 
Tho*  I  faw  I  could  not  get  it  as  of  my  felf,  any  more  than  I 
could  make  a  World.  In  the  latter  Exercife,  blefTed  be  the 
Lord,  I  had  fome  Fervency,  both  in  Prayer  andPreaching  ;  and 
cfpecially  in  th«  Application  of  piyDifcguife  was  enabled  to 

T  addreft 


2^6   Mt.  27:  fi^^  LIFE 

addrefs  precious  Souls  with  Affe6lion, Concern,  Tcndernefs  ar<3 
Importunity.  The  Spirit  of  God,  I  thiffk,  was  there  5  as  tl.« 
EjfFe(5ls  were  apparent.  Tears  running  down  many  Cheeks. 

Monday,  Dicem.  10.  Near  Noon,  I  preach'd  again  :  God 
cave  me  fome  Affiftance,  and  enabled  me  to  be  in  fome  Degree 
faithful  ;  io  that  I  had  Peace  in  my  own  Soul,  and  a  very  com- 
fortable Compofure,  alM  Ifrael  Ihiuld  mt  he  gathered.  Came 
away  homGreenwich^znd  rodeHcme  ;  arrived  juft  in  theEvening. 
By  the  Way,  my  Soul  blefs'd  God  for  his  Goodnefs  ;  and  I 
rejoyced,  that  fo  much  of  my  Work  was  done,  and  I  fo  much 
nearer  my  bleiled  Reward .  Blefled  be  God  for  Grace  to  be 
faithful. 

Tuefday,  Decern.  1 1.  Felt  very  poorly  in  Body, being  much- 
tired  and  worn  cut  the  laft  Night.  Was  afHfted  in  fome  Mea- 
fure  in  writing  on  a  divineSubjedl :  But  was  fo  feeble  and  fore  in 
my  Breaft,  that  I  bad  not  much  Refolution  in  my  Work.  Oh, 
how  I  long  for  that  World  where  the  weary  are  atReJi  !  And  yet 
thro*  the  Goodnefs  of  God  I  don't  now  feel  impatient. 

Wednefday,  Decern.  12.  Was  again  very  weak  ;  but  fome- 
what  afEfted  in  fccret  Prayer,  and  enabled  with  Pleafure  and 
Sweetnefs  to  cry  y  Come,  Lordje/us/  Comey  Lordjefus-y  corns 
quickly »  My  Soul  longed  for  Gody  for  the  living  God.  O  how 
delightful  it  is,  to  pray  under -fuch  fweet  Influences  \  Oh  how 
much  better  is  this, than  one's  neceJfaryFood  !  I  had  at  thisTimc 
no  Difpofition  to  eat  ( tho'  lat?  in  the  Morning  ; )  for  earthly 
Food  appeared  wholly  Taftlefs.  O  how  much  better  is  thyLove 
than  Wine,  than  the  fweeteft  Wine  !—  I  vifited  and  preached 
to  the  Indiansy  in  the  Afternoon  5  but  under  much  Dejection. 
Found  my  Interpreter  under  fome  Concern  for  his  Soul  ;  which 
was  'iome  Comfort  to  me  5  and  yet  filPd  me  with  new  Care, 
I  longed  greatly  for  his  Converfion ;  lifted  up  my  Heart  to  God 
for  it, while  I  was  talking  to  him  ;  CameHome,and  poured  out 
my  Soul  to  God  for  him  :  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in  Prayer, 
and  was  enabled,  I  think,  to  leave  all  with  God. 

Thurfday,  Decern.  13.  Endeavoured  to  fpend  the  Day  in 
Fafting  and  Prayer,  to  implore  the  divine  Blefling,  more  efpeci- 
ally  on  my  poor  People  ;  and  in  particular,  I  fought  for  con- 
verting Grace  for  my  Interpreter^  a.nd  three  or  four  more  under 
fome  Concern  for  their  Souls.  I  was  much  difordered  in  the 
Morning  when  I  arofe  ;  but  having  determined  to  fpend  theDay 
in  this  Manner,!  attempted  it.  SomeFrcedom  I  had  in  pleading 
for  thefe  poor  concerned  Souls,  feveral  Times ;  and  when  in- 
ttrcseding  for  ihem,  Unjoyed  greater  Freedom  from  wandring 

6^vA 


(?/M-.  David Bcainerd;      A.D.1744:     157 

and  diflraaing  Thoughts,  than  in  any  Part  of  my  Supplications: 
But,  in  the  general,  was  greatly  exercifcd  with  Wandrings  ;  fa 
that  in  the  Evening  it  feemed  as  if  1  had  need  to  pray  for  no- 
thing fo  much  as  for  thePardon  of  Sins  committed  in  theDay  paft, 
and  theVilenefs  I  then  found  in  ray  felf.  TheSins  I  had  moftSeni'b 
of,  were  Pride,  and  wandring  Thoughts,  whereby  1  mocked 
God.  The  former  of  thcfe  curfed  iniquities  excited  me  to  think 
of  writing,  or  preaching,  or  converting  Heathen,or  performing 
fome  other  great  Work,  that  my  Name  might  live  when  I  (liouid 
be  dead.  My  Soul  was  in  Anguifh,  and  ready  to  drop  into 
Defpair,  to  find  fo  much  of  that  curfed  Temper.  VVith  this, 
and  the  other  Evil  I  laboured  under,  i/Zz.  wandring  Thoughts, 
I  was  almoft  overwhelmed,  and  even  ready  to  give  over  flriving; 
after  aSpirit  of  Devotion  ;  and  oftentimes  funk  into  a  confidera- 
ble  Degree  of  Defpondency,  and  thought  I  was  more  bruti/h  than 
any  Man,  Yet  after  all  my  Sorrows,  I  truft  thro'  Grace,  this 
Day  and  the  Exercifes  of  it  have  been  for  my  Good,  and  taught 
me  more  of  m)'  Corruption,  and  Weaknefs  without  Chrift,  than 
Iknewbeforfe 

Friday,  Decern,  14.  Near  Noon,  went  to  the  Indians  i  but 
knew'not  what  to  fay  to  them,  and  was  afliamed  to  look  them 
in  the  Face  :  I  felt  I  had  no  Power  to  addrefs  their  Confciences, 
and  therefore  had  no  Boldnefs  to  fay  any  Thing.  Was,  much 
of  the  Day,  in  a  great  Degree  of  Defpair  about  ever  doing  or 
feeing  any  Goad  in  the  Land  cf  the  Living, 

f  He  continued  under  the  fame  Dejedtion  the  next  Day.] 

Lord*s-Day,  Decern,  16.     Was  (o  overwhelmed  with  De- 
je£tion,that  I  knew  not  how  to  live  :  I  long'd  forDeath  exceed- 
ingly :  My  Soul  was  funk  into  deep  Waters^   and  the  Floods  were 
ready  to  drown  me :  I  was  fo  much  opprefs'd,  that  my  Soul  was 
in  a  kind  of  Horrour  :  I  could  not  keep  niy  Thoughts  fixed  in 
Prayer,  for  the  Space  of  one  Minute,  without  Fluttering  andDi- 
ftradlion  :  I  was  exceedingly  a{hamed,thatl  did  not  live  toGod  : 
I  had  no  diftreffing  Doubt  about   my  own  State  ;  but  would 
have  cheerfully  ventured  (  as  far  as  I  could  poflibly  know)  into 
Eternity.     While  1  was   going  to  preach  to  the  Indians^  my 
Soul  was  in  Anguifti  ;  I  was  fo  overborn  withDifcourageme^^  ; 
that  I  defpair'd  of  doing  any  Good,  and  was  driven  to  my  Witi 
End  ;  I  knew  nothing  what  to  fay,  nor  what  Courfe  to  take. 
But  at  laft  I  infifted  on  the  Evidence  we  h^/e  of  the  Truth  of 
Chriftianity  from  the  Miracles  o(  Chrift;  many  of  which  I  fet 

T  2  before 


13^    -^/.  27^  K^  LIFE 

before  them :  And  God  helped  me  to  make  a  clofe  Application 
to  thofi;  that  refufed  to  believe  theTruth  of  what  I  taught  them  : 
And  indeed  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  to  the  Confciences  of  all, 
in  feme  Meafure.  I  was  fomething  encouraged,  to  find,  that 
God  enabled  me  to  be  faithful  once  more.  Then  came  and 
preached  to  another  Company  of  them ;  but  was  very  weary 
and  faint.  In  the  Evening,  I  was  fomething  refrefh'd,  and  was 
enabled  to  pray  and  praife  God  with  Compofure  and  AfFe£lion  : 
Had  fome  Enlargement  andCourage  with  Refpedl:  to  my  Work  : 
Was  willing  to  live,  and  longed  to  do  more  for  God,  than  my 
weak  ftate  of  Body  woiald  admit  of.  1  can  do  all  Things  through 
Chri/i  that  Jirengthens  me  ;  and  by  his  Grace,  I  am  willing  to 
fpend  and  be  /pent  in  his  Service,  when  I  am  not  thus  funk  in 
Peje6tion  and  a  kind  of  Defpair. 

Monday ,  Decern.  17.  Was  fomething  comfortable  in  Mincf» 
ynoft  of  the  Day  ;  and  was  enabled  to  pray  with  fome  Freedom, 
Cheerfulnefs,  Compofure,  and  Devotion  ;  had  alfo  fome  Af- 
(iftance  in  writing  on  a  divine  Subje6l. 

Tut^ddiy^  Decemb.  1%.  Went  to  the  Indians,  and  difcourfed 
to  them,  near  an  Hour,  without  any  Power  to  come  clofe  to 
their  Hearts.  But  at  lalt,  [  felt  fome  Fervency,  andGod  help'd 
ine  to  fpeak  with  Warmth.  My  Interpreter  alfo  was  amazingly 
afTifted  ;  and  I  doubt  not  but  theSpirit  o/God  was  upon  him  (tho* 
|,had  no  Reafon  to  think  he  had  any  true  and  faving  Grace,  but 
was  only  under  Convidtion  of  his  loft  State  ;  )  and  prefently 
upon  this  moft  of  the  grown  Perfons  were  much  afFedled,  and 
the  Tears  ran  down  their  Cheeks  ;  and  one  oldMan  (  I  fuppofe, 
^n  hundred  Years  old  )  was  fo  afFedled,  that  he  wept,and  feem'd 
convinced  of  the  Importance  of  what  I  taught  them.  I  ftaid 
with  them  a  confiderable  Time,  exhorting  and  directing  them  j 
and  c^me  away,  lifting  up  my  Heart  toGod  in  Prayer  and  Praife, 
and  encouraged  and  exhorted  my  Interpreter  to  firive  to  enter  in 
at  th^  /trait  Gate,  Came  home,  and  fpent  moft  of  the  Evening 
in  Prayer  and  Thankfgiving  ;  and  found  my  felf  much  enlarged 
9^^  quicken'd.  Was  greatly  concerned,  that  the  Lord's 
^ork  which  feem'd  to  be  begun, might  be  carried  onwithPower, 
to  the  Converfion  of  poor  Souls,and  the  Glory  of  divine  Grace. 

Wednefday,  Decemb.  19.  Spenta  greatPart  of  theDay  inPray^ 
er  to  God  for  the  Out  pouring  of  his  Spirit  on  my  poor  People  j 
Bialfo  to  blefs  his  Name  for  awakning  my  Interpreter ^  and  (ome 
ethers,  and  giving  us  fome  Tokens  of  his  Prcfence  Yefterday. 
And  blefied  be  God,  I  hid  much  Freedom,  five  or  fix  Times 
in  the  Day,  in  Prayer  and  Praife,    and  felt  a  weighty  Corxern 

tspOD 


ofMr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D,  1744.     139 

upon  my  Spirit  for  the  Salvation  of  thofe  predous  Souls,  and 
the  Enlargement  of  the  Redeemer's  Kingdom  among  them.  My 
Soul  hoped  inGod  for  fomeSuccefs  in  my  Miniftry  ;  And  blefled 
be  his  Name  forfo  much  Hope. 

Thurfday,  Decemb.  20.  Was  enabled  to  vifu  the  Throne  of 
Grace  frequently,  this  Day  ;  and  thro'  divine  Goodnefs  enjoy- 
ed much  Freedom  and  Fervency,  fundry  Times :  Was  much 
aflifted  in  crying  for  Mercy  for  my  poor  People,  and  feltChear- 
fulnefs  and  Hope  in  my  Requefts  for  them.  Ifpent  much  of 
the  Day  in  Writing  s  but  was  enabled  to  intermix  Prayer  with 
my  Studies. 

¥nd2iy,Decemb.2i*  Was  enabled  again  to  pray  withFreedom, 
Chearfulnefs,  and  Hope.  God  was  pleafed  to  make  the  Duty 
comfortable  and  pleafant  to  me  ;  fo  that  I  delighted  to  perfe- 
vere,  and  repeatedly  to  engage  in  it.  Towards  Noon,  vifited 
my  People,  arid  fpent  the  whole  Time  in  the  Way  to  them  in 
Prayer,  longing  toy^^  the  Power  of  God  among  them,  as  there 
appeared  fomething  of  it  the  laft  Tuefday  ;  and  1  found  it  fweet 
to  reft  and  hope  In  God.  Preach'd  to  them  twice,  and  at  two 
diftindt  Places  :  Had  confiderable  Freedom,  each  Time,  and 
(oh^d  my  Interpreter,  Several  of  'em  followed  me  from  one 
Place  to  the  other  :  And  I  thought,  there  was  fome  divine  In- 
fluence difcernable  amongft  them.  In  the  Evening, was  aflifted 
in  Prayer  again.  BlefTed,  blefted  be  the  Lord. 

[  Very  much  the  fame  Things  are  exprefTed  concerning  his 
inward  Frame,  Exercifes,  and  Afliftances  on  Saturday,  as  on 
the  preceeding  Days.  He  obferves,  that  this  was  a  comfortable 
Week  to  him.  But  then  concludes,  Oh  !  That  I  hadnoReafon 
to  complain  of  much  Barrennefs.  Oh  that  there  were  no  vainThoUf 
end  evil  JffeSfions  lodging  within  me.  The  Lord  knows  how  1  long 
for  that  JVorld^  where  they  refl  not  Day  nor  Nighty  faying ^  Holy^ 
Holy^  Holy^  is  the  Lord  God  Almighty^  Sec,  On  the  following 
§abbath,  he  fpeaks  of  Afliftance  and  Freedom  in  his  pablick 
Work,  but  as  having  lefs  of  the  fenfible  Prefencc  of  God,  than 
frequently  in  the  Week  paft :  But  yet  fays,hisSouI  was  kept  from 
linking  it>  Difcouragement.  On  Monday,  again  he  feem*d  to 
enjoy  very  much  the  fame  Liberty  and  Fervency,  thro'  theDay, 
that  he  enjoyed  thro*  tlie  greaterPartof  the  preceeding  Week.*] 

*  This  Day  he  wrote  the  fifth  Ldtgr  added  at  the  End  of 
this  Hiftpry, 

Tucfdavj 


>40     y^/.  27.  [The   LIFE  A.D,  1745: 

Tuefday,  Decmh,  25.Enjoy'd  very  little  quIetSIeep  laftNighf, 
by  Reafon  of  bodily  Wcakneis,  and  the  clofenefs  of  my  Studies 
Yefterday  ;  YetmyHeart  was  fomewhat  lively  in  Prayer&Praife : 
I  was  delighted  with  the  divine  Glory  and  Happinefs,  and  re- 
joyced  that  God  was  God,  &  that  he  was  unchangeably  poflefs'd 
of  Glory  and  Ble/Tednefs.  Tho'  God  held  my  Eyes  ivakingy  yet 
he  helped  me  to  improve  my  Time  profitably  amidft  my  Pains 
and  Weaknefs,  in  continued  Meditations  on  Lukexnu  "]. Behold 
ihefe  three  Yean  1  come  ]e shin g  Fruity  he.  My  Meditations  were 
fwect  y  and  I  wanted  to  fet  before  Sinners  iheir  Sin  andDanger* 

[  He  continued  in  a  very  low  State,  as  to  his  bodily  Health, 
for  fome  Days  :  Which  feems  to  have  been  a  great  Hindrance 
to  him  in  his  religious  Exercifes  and  Purfuits.  But  yet  he  ex- 
prefTes  fome  Degree  of  divine  Affiftance,  from  Day  to  Day,, 
thro'  the  remaining  Part  of  this  Week.  He  preached  feveral 
Times  this  Week  to  his  Indians  ;  and  there  appeared  flill  fome 
Concern  amongft  them  for  theirSouJs.  OnSaturday,  he  rode  to 
the  Jrijh  Settlement,  about  15  Miles  from  his  Lodgings, in  order 
to  fpend  the  Sabbath  there.  ] 

LordVDay,  D^f^fw^.  30.  Difcourfed,  both  Parts  of  the  Day, 
from  Mark  viii.  34.  Who fcever  will  come  after  me^  &c.  God  gave 
me  very  great  Freedom  and  Clearnefs,  and  (in  the  Afternoon 
efpecially )  confiderable  Warmth  and  Fervency.  In  tfee  Even- 
ing alfo,  had  very  great  Clearnefs  while  converling  with  Friends 
on  divine  Things  ;  \  don't  remember  ever  to  have  had  more 
clear  Apprehenfions  of  Religion  in  mvLife  :  But  found  a  Strug- 
gle, in  the  Evening,  with  fpiritual  Piide. 

[  On  Monday,  he  preach'd  again  in  the  fame  Place  with 
Freedom  and  Fervency  ;  and  rode  home  to  his  Lodging  ;  and 
arrived  in  the  Evening,  under  a  confiderable  Degree  of  bodily 
lllnefs,  which  continued  the  two  next  Days.  And  he  complains 
much  of  fpiritual  Emptinefs  and  Barrennefs  on  thofe  Days.] 

Thux^6?iy ^January  3.1744,5.  Being fenfible  of  the  great  want 
of  divine  Influences,  and  the  out- pouring  of  God's  Spirit,  I  fpent 
this  Day  in  Falling  and  Prayer,  to  feck  fo  great  a  Mercy  for  my 
fei',  and  my  poor  People  in  particular,  and  for  the  Church  of 
God  in  general.  In  the  Morning,  was  very  Lifelefs  in  Prayer, 
and  could  get  fcarce  any  Senfe  of  God.  Near  Noon,  enioycd 
fome  fweet  Freedom  to  pray  that  ih^ff'illrfGsdsT.izhi  in  every 

Refpea 


of  Mr,  Dav'id  Bralneid.     A.D.  1745.     141; 

Hcfpedt  become  mine  :  And  I  am  perfwaded,  it  was  fo  at  that 
Time  in  fome  good  Degree.  In  the  Afternoon,  I  was  exceeding 
weak,  and  could  not  enjoy  much  Fervency  in  Prayer  ;  but  felt 
a  great  Degree  of  Dejedtion  ;  which,  I  believe,  was  very  much 
owing  to  my  bodily  Wealcnefs  and  DfTorder. 

Friday,  Jan,  4.  Rode  up  to  the  Indians^  near  Noon  ;  fpent 
fome  Time  there  under  greatDiforder  :  My  Soul  was/««/^  down 
into  ^i^^^^aters^2Si^  I  was  almoft  overwhelmed  with  Melancholy. 

Saturday,  Jan*  5.  Was  able  to  do  fomething  at  Writing  i&t, 
but  was  much  difordercd  with  Pain  in  my  Head.  At  Nighr,  wa?'' 
diftrefs'd  with  a  Senfeof  my  fpiritual  Pollution,  and  tzn  Thou- 
fand  youthful,  yea,,  and  childifh  Follies,  that  no  Body  but;  ,ny 
id(  had  any  Thought  about  ;  all  which  appeared  to  me  now 
frefh,  and  in  a  lively  View,  as  if  committed  Yefterday,and  made 
HIV  Soul  afhamcd  before  God,  and  caufed  me  to  hate  my  felf. 

Lord's-Day,  Jan.  6.  Was  ftill  diftrefs'd  with  vapoury  Dif- 
ordersr  Preached  to  my  poor  Indians  ;  but  had  little  Heart  or 
Life.  Towards  Night,  my  Soul  was  prefs'd  under  a  Sen fe  of 
myUnfaithfulnefs.  O  the  Joy  &  Peace  that  arifes  from  a  Senfe 
of  having  obtain' d  Mercy  of  God  to  be  faithful  J  And  Oh,theMifcry 
and  Anguifh  that  fpring  from  an  Apprehenfion  of  the  contrary  ? 

[  His  Deje6tion  continued  the  two  next  Days  ;  but  not  to 
fo  great  a  Degree  on  Tuefday,  when  he  enjoyed  fome  Freedom 
and  Fervency  in  preaching  to  the  Indians,'] 

Wednefday,  Jan,  9.  In  the  Morning,  God  was  pleas'd  to 
remove  that  Gloom  which  has  of  late  opprefs'd  my  Mind,  and 
gave  me  Freedom  and  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer.  I  was  encouraged 
and  flrengthe'd,  and  enabled  to  plead  for  Grace  for  my  (df^  and 
Mercy  for  my  poor  Indians  ;  and  was  fvireetly  aflifted  in  my 
Interceffions  with  God  for  others.  BIcffed  be  his  holy  Name 
forever  and  ever  ;  Amen,  and  Amen.  Thofe  Things  that  of 
late  have  appeared  moft  difficult  and  almoft  impofTible,  now  ap- 
peared not  only  pofTible,  but  eafy.  My  Soul  fo  much  delighted 
to  continue  inftant  in  Prayer,  at  this  bleiTed  Seafon,  that  I  had 
noDefire  for  my  necejfary  Food :  even  dreaded  leaving  ofFpraying 
at  all, left  I  fliould  lofe  this  Spirituality, and  this  blefTedThanlcful- 
nefs  to  God  which  I  then  felt.  I  felt  now  quite  willing  to  live, 
and  undergo  all  Trials  that  might  remain  for  me  in  a  World  of 
Sorrow  ;  but  ftill  longed  for  Heaven,  that  I  might  glorify  God 
in  a  perfedl  Manner.  O  c-jme,  Lord  Jefus^  come  quickly.  Spent 
the  Day  in  Reading  a  little  ;  and  in  Ibme  Diverfions,  which  I 
was  neccflitated  to  take  by  Reafon  of  much  Weaknefs  and 
Diforder.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  fomeFreedom  and  Intenfe- 
lafs  ia  Prayer,  '  [The 


142    /^/.  27.  TZ^^LIFE 

[  The  three  remaining  Days  of  the  Week,  he  was  very  low 
and  feeble  inBody  ;  but  nevcrthelefs  continued  conftantly  in  the 
fame  comfortable  fweet  Frame  of  Mind,  as  is  exprefled  onWcd- 
irefday.  On  the  Sabbath,  this  Sweetnefs  and  fpiritual  Alacrity 
began  to  abate  :  But  ft  ill  he  enjoyed  fome  Degree  of  Comfort, 
and  had  Afliftance  in  preaching  to  the  Indians,} 

Monday,  Jan.  14.  Spent  this  Day  under  a  great  Degree  of 
\^odi]y  Weaknefs  and  Diforder  ;  and  had  very  little  Freedom, 
either  in  my  Studies  cr  Devotions :  And  in  the  Evening,  I  Vi'as 
mach  dejeded  and  melancholy.  It  pains  and  diftreffes  me, 
that  I  live  fo  much  of  my  Time  for  nothing.  I  long  to  do  much 
in  a  little  Time,  and  if  it  might  be  the  Lord's  will,  to  finijh  mf 
Work  fpeedily  in  this  tirefom  World.  Tm  fure,  I  don't  defire 
to  live  for  any  ThiRg  in  this  World  ;  and  thro*  Grace  I  am 
not  afraid  to  look  the  King  of  Terrors  in  the  Face :  I  know,  I 
(hall  be  afraid,  if  God  leaves  me  ;  and  therefore  I  think  it  always 
Duty  to  lay  in  for  that  folemn  Hour.  But  for  a  very  confidera- 
ble  Time  paft,  my  Soul  has  rejoyced  to  think  of  Death  in  its 
neareft  Approaches  ;  a«d  even  when  I  have  been  very  vi'eak,and 
feem'd  neareit  Eternity.  Jslot  unto  me^  not  unto  me^  but  to  God 
be  the  Glory,  1  feel  that  which  convinces  me,  that  if  God  don't 
enable  me  to  maintain  a  holy  Dependance  upon  him,Death  will 
eafdy  be  a  Tcrrour  to  me ;  but  at  prefent,  1  muft  fay,  Ilongto 
depart  and  to  be  with  Chrijiy  which  is  beft  of  all.  When  I  am  in 
a  fweet  refigned  Ffame  of  Soul,  I  am  willing  to  tarry  a  while  in. 
a  World  of  Sorrow,  1  am  willing  to  be  from  Home  as  long  as 
God  fees  fit  it  fhould  be  io  :  But  when  I  want  the  Influence  of 
this  Temper,  I  am  then  apt  to  be  impatient  to  be  gone.-—  Oh 
when  will  the  Day  appear,  that  I  fhall  be  perfect  in  Holinefs, 
and  in  the  Enjoyment  of  God  1 

[  The  next  Day  was  fpent  under  a  great  Degree  of  Deje£lion 
andMelancholy  ;  which  (  as  he  himfelf  fa> s,  he  was  perfwaded  ) 
was  owing  partly  to  bodily  Weaknefs,  and  vapoury Diforders.J 

Wednefday,  &  Thurfjay,  Jan.  16  &  17.  I  fpent  moft  of 
theTimein  writing  on  a  fweet  divine  Subje6l,and  enjoyed  fome 
Freedom  and  AlHftance.  Was  likewife  enabled  to  pray  more 
frequently  and  fervently  than  ufual  :  and  my  Soul,  I  think, 
rcjosced  iR  God  i  efpecially  on  the  Evening  of  the  laft  of  thefe 
Days  :  Praije  then  feem'd  comely^  and  I  delighted  to  blefs  the 
Lord.    O  what  Rcafon  have  I  to  be  thankful,  that  God  «ver 

.''^'  helps 


/  yJ 


i?/iWir.  David  Bramerd.         A.D.1745:    14^ 

helps  me  to  Labour  and  Study  for  him  I  He  does  but  receive  his 
«ar«,when  I  am  enabled  in  anyMeafure  to  praife  himjlabour  for 
him,  and  live  to  him.  Oh,  how  comfortable  and  fweetitis^ 
to  feel  the  Affiftance  of  divine  Grace  in  the  Performance  of  the 
Duties  God  has  enjoined  us  I  Ble/s  the  Lord^  O  my  SouL 

[  The  fame  Enlargement  of  Heart  andjoyfulFrame  of  Soul 
continued  thro'  the  next  Day.  But  on  the  Day  following  it 
began  to  decline  5  which  Decay  feems  to  have  continued  the 
whole  of  the  next  Week  :  Yet  be  enjoyed  fome  Seafons  of 
Ipccial  and  fweet  Affiftance.] 

Lord's- Day,  Jan.  27.  Had  the  greateft  Degree  of  inward 
Anguifh,  that  almoft  ever  I  endured  :  I  was  perfedly  over- 
whelmed, and  fo  confufedjthat  after  I  began  to  ^ifcourfe  to  the 
Jndiansy  before  I  could  finifh  a  Sentence,  fometimes  I  forgot  en- 
tirely what  I  was  aiming  at ;  or  if,  with  much  difficulty,  I  had 
recolleded  what  I  had  before  defigned,  ftill  it  appeared  ftrange, 
and  like  fomething  I  had  long  forgotten,  and  had  now  but  an 
imperfect  Remembrance  of.  I  know,  it  was  a  Degree  of 
Diftradlion,  occafion'd  by  vapoury  Diforders,  Melancholy, 
fpiritual  Defertion,  and  fome  other  Things  that  particularly 
prefs'd  upon  me,  this  Morning,  with  an  uncommon  Weight, 
the  principal  of  which  rerpe(5ed  my  Indians,  This  diftrelTing 
Gloom  never  went  off  the  whole  Day  j  but  wasfo  far  removed, 
that  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  fome  Freedom  and  Concern 
to  the  Indians y  at  two  of  their  Settlements  ;  and  I  think,  there 
was  fome  Appearance  of  the  Prefence  of  God  with  us,  fome 
Serioufnefs,  and  feeming  Concern  among  the  Indians^  at  leaft  a 
few  of  them.  In  the  Evening,  this  Gloom  continued  ftill,  'till 
Family-Prayer,  *  about  nine  o'Clock,  and  almoft  thro'  this, 
until  I  came  near  the  Clofe,  when  I  was  praying  (  as  I  ufualiy 
do)  for  the  Illumination  andConverfion  of  my  poor  People  \  and 
then  the  Cloud  was  fcattcr'd,  fo  that  I  enjoyM  Sweetnefs  and 
Freedom,  and  conceived  Hopes,  that  God  defigned  Mercy  foe 
fome  of  them.  The  fame  I  enjoyed  afterwards  in  fecretPraycr  ; 


Tho'  Mr.  Brainerd  now  dwelt  by  himfelf  in  the  foremen- 
tion*d  littleCottage,which  he  had  built  for  his  ownUfe.yeC 
that  was  near  to  a  Family  of  white  People  with  whom  he 
had  lived  beforCi  and  with  whom  he  ftill  attended  Family- 
Prayer, 


144    ^^'  ^7-  ^^^  LIFE 

in  which  preciousDuty  I  bad  for  a  confiderable  Time  Sweet-^ 
ttefs  and  Freedom,  and  (  I  hope  )  Faith,  in  praying  for  rriy  fcif, 
my  poor  Indians,  and  dear  Friends  and  Acquaintance  in  New 
■  EnglarJ  and  elfewhere,  and  for  the  dear  Intereft  of  Xim  in 
general.  Bufs  the  Lor^y  O  my  Soui,  and  forget  not  all  his 
Benefits, 

[  He  fpent  the  reft  of  this  Week,  or  at  leaft  the  moft  of  it, 
under  Dejedion  a.ndMelancholy  :  Which  on  Friday  rofe  to  an 
c^ctream  Height ;  he  being  then,  as  he  himfelf  obferves,  much 
exercifed  with  vapoury  Diforders.  This  exceed ingGloomlnefs 
continued  on  Saturday,  'till  the  Evening,  when  he  was  again  re- 
lieved in  Family-Prayer  ;  and  after  it,  vi^as  refrefh'd  in  fecret, 
and  felt  willing  to  live,  and  endure  Hardfhips  in  the  Caufe  of 
God  ',  and  found  his  Hopes  of  the  Advancement  of  Chrift's 
Kingdom,  as  alfo  his  Hopes  to  fee  the  Power  of  God  among  the 
poor  Indians,  confiderably  raifed.  ] 

Lord's-Day,  Feb.  3.     In  the  Morning,  I  was  fomewhat  re- 
lieved of  that  Gloom  and  Confufion,  that  my  Mind  has  of  late 
been  greatly  exercifed  with  :  Was  enabled  to  pray  with  fome 
..  Compofure,  and  Comfort.     But  however,  went  to  my  Indians 
tremblings  for  my  Soul  remembredihe  Wormwood  and  the  Gall 
(  I  might  almoft  fay  the  Hell  )  of  Friday  laft  ;  and  I  was  greatly 
afraid  1  fhould  be  obliged  again  to  drink  of  i\\2XCup  of  Tremblings 
which  was  inconceivably  more  bitter  than  Death,  and  made  me 
long  for  the  Grave  more,  unfpeakably  more,  than  for  hid  Trea- 
sures, yea,  inconceivably  more  than  the  Men  of  this  World  long 
for  fuch  Treafures.     But  God  was  pleafed  to  hear  my  Cries,and 
to  afford  hie  great  Afiiftance  ;  fo  that  1  felt  Peace  in  my  own 
Soul  ;  and  was  fatisfied  that  if  not  one  of  the    Indians  fhould  be 
profited  by  my  Preaching, but  fliould  all  be  damned,  yet  I  fhould 
be  accepted  and  rcwardecJ  as  faithful ;  for  I  am  perfwaded,  God 
enabled  mc  to  be  io.—  Had  fome  good  Degree  of  Help  after- 
.  ^v^rds,  at  another  Place  j  and  much  longed  for  the  Converfion 
of  the  poor  Indians,   Was  fomewhat  refrefhed,  and  comfortable, 
.  tq,wards  Nighr,   and  \n  the  Evening.     O   that  my  Soul  might 
praife  the  Lord  for  his  Goodnefs.---  Enjoyed  fomeFreedom,  in 
ihe  Evening,  in  Meditation  on  Luke  xiii.  24. 
^      [  In  the  three  next  Days,  he  was   the  Subject  of  much  De- 
jedlion  ;   But  the  three  remaining  Days  of  the  Week  feem  to 
have  been  fpent  with  much   Compofure  and  Comfort,  On  the 
nqxt  Sabb.iih,  he  preach'd  at  Greenwich  in  New-Jerfey.    In  the 
Evening,  he  rode  eight  Miles  to  vifit  a  Tick  Man  at  the  Point  of 
Death,  and  found  him  Speecbkfs  and  Senfclcfs.  ] 

,; Mdndavj 


<»/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1745;    145 

Monday,  Feb.  n.     About  Break-of-Dav    the  firk  l\/r,„ 
died.     IwasaffeaedaetheSight:  Sp.nt  tSofn  nfwith^t  .^ 
Mourners;  and  afrer  Prayer,  and  fome  Difcourfe  with  theZ 
1  returned  to  Greenwich, zv,^  preached  again  fromP/^/.  Ixxxix  i  c 
And   the  Lord    gave  me  Affiftance  :    1  felt  afweet  Love  to 
Souls,  and  to  the  Kingdom   of  Chrift  ;  and  longed  that  poor 
Sinners  might  know  the  joyful  Sound.  Several  Pcrfons  v^^ere  much 
^^^^f^     And  after  Meeting,  I  was  enabled  to  difcourfe   with 
l-reedom  and  Concern,  to  fome  Perfons  that  appffed  to  me  under 
fpimual  Trouble.     Left  the  Place,  i^^^t\y  compofed,  and  red' 
home  to  myHoufe  about  8  Miles  diftant.  Difcourfed  re  Friends 
and  mculcated  divine  Truths  upon  feme.     In  the  Evening,  was 
m  the  moft  folemn  Frame  that  almoft  ever  I  remember  to  have 
experienced  :  1  know  not  that  ever  Death  appeared  more  real 
tome   or  that  ever  I  faw  my  felf  in  the   Condition  of   a  dead 
Corpfe   laid  out  and^drefs'd  for  aLodging  in  the  filent  Grave,  fo 
evidently  as  at  thisTime.  And  yet  I  felt  exceeding  comfortably  : 
My  Mind  was  compofed  and  calm,  and  Death  appeared    with^ 
out  a  btwg,     I  think,  I  never  felt  fuch  an  univerfal  Mortifica- 
tion to  all  created  Objeas  as  now.     Oh,  how  great  and  folemn 
a  I  hing  It  appeared  to  die  \  Oh,  how  it  lays  the  greateftHonour 
in  the  Duft  I  And   Oh,  how  vain  and  trifling  did  the  Riches 
Honours,  and  Pleafures  of  the  World  appear  I  I  could  not   I 
dare  not,  fo  mucji  as  think  of  any  of  them  :  for  Death,  Death, 
lolemn  (  tho'  not  frightful  )  Death  appeared  at  the  Door.     Oh 
I  could  fee  my  fclf  dead,  and  laid  out,  and  inclofed  in  myCoifin' 
and  put  down  into  the  cold  Grave,  with  greateft  Solemnity,buc 
without  Terror  I    If  pent  moft  of  the  Evening,  in  conveifing 
with  a  dearChriftianFriend  :  And,blefled  be  God, it  was  a  com- 
fortable Evening  to  us  both.--  What  are  Friends?   What  are 
Comforts  ?   What  are  Sorrows  ?   What  are  Difirt/les  ?--  The 
Time  is/hort :  It  remains,  that  they  which  weep.be  asiho'  they  wept 
not ;  ^  and   they   which  rejoyce,    as  tho*  they  rej^yceJ  not  :  for  the 
Fa/hion  of  this  World  paffeth  azvqy,     O  come,   Urd  Jefus,   ceme 
quickly  ;  Amen.—  Blelled  be  God  for   the  Comfor'ts  of   the 
paft  Day. 

Tuefday,  Feb.  12.  Was  exceeding  weak  3  but  in  a  fweet 
refigned,  compofed  Frame,  moft  of  ^he  Day  ;  Felt  my  Heart 
freely  go  forth  after  God  in  Prayer.        ^' 

^ednefday,  Feb,  i^.  Was  much  exercifcd  with  vapoury 
Diforders  J  butftili  enabled  to  maintain  SoIemnity,and  i  thin^.. 
Spirituality, 


146      mt.if.  "The  LIFE 

Thurfday,  Fel^  14.  Spent  the  Day  in  writing  on  a  divine 
Subjedl  :  Enjoy'd  Health,  and  Freedom  in  my  Work  :  Had  a 
folemn  Senfe  of  Death  ;  as  I  have  indeed  had  every  Day  this 
Week,  in  feme  Meafure  :  What  I  felt  on  Monday  laft,  has 
been  abiding,  in  feme  confiderable  Degree,  ever  fmee. 

Friday,  Fgb,  15.     Was  engaged  in  writing  again  almofl  the 
whole  Day.     In  the  Evening,   was   much  aflifted  in  meditating 
on  that  precious  Text,  John  vii.  37.     Jifusjiood  and  cried  &c. 
I  had  then  a  fweet  Senfe  of  the  free  Grace  of  the  Gofpel  :   My 
Soul  was  encouraged,    warm'd  and  quicken'd,  and  my  Defires 
drawn  out  after  God  in  Prayer  ;  My  Soul  was   watchful,  and 
afraid  of  lofing  fo  fweet  a  Guefl  as  I  then  entertain*d,     I  conti- 
nued long  in  Prayer  and  Meditation,  intermixing  one  with  the 
other  j    and  was  unwilling  to  be  diverted   by  any  Thing  at  all 
from  (o  fweet  an  Exercife.     I  longed  to  proclaim  the  Grace  I 
then  meditated  upon,  to  the  World  of  Sinners.—-  O  how  quhk 
and  powerful  is  the  IVcrd  of  the  blelTed  God  ! 

[  The  next  Day,  he  complains  of  great  Confli<5is  with  Cor-^ 
ruption,  and  much  Difcompofure  of  Mind.] 

Lord 's- Day, /v^.  17.     Preach'd  to  the  iw^/Zr  People  (  my 
Interpreter  being  abfent )  in  the  WiJderncfs  upon  the  funny  fide 
of  a  Hill  :  Had  a  cofrnderable  Affembly,  confifling   of  People 
that  lived  (at  lead  many  of  them)  not  k(s  than  30  Miles  afun- 
der  ;  fome  of  them  came  near  20  Miles.     I  difcourfed  to  'em, 
^11  Day,  from  John  vii,  37.    Je/us  (losd  and  cried ^  faying ^  JIf  ony 
Man  ihirfl^  &c.   In  the  Afternoon,    it  pleafed  God  to  grant  me 
-^reat  Freedom  and  Fervency  in  my  Difcourfe  5  and  I  was  ena- 
bled to  imitate  the  Example  of  Chrift  in  the  Texr,whoy?Wa«d 
iried.-"  I  think,   I    was  fcarce  ever  enabled  to   offer  the  free 
Grace  of  God   to    perifhing  Sinners  with  more  Freedom  and 
Plainnefs  in  my  Life.     And  afterwards,  I  was  enabled  earneftly 
to  invite  the  Children  of.God  to  come  renewedly,  and  drink  of 
this  Fountain  of  Water  of  Life,   from  whence  they  have  here- 
tofore derived  unfpeakable  Saiisfadlion.    It  was  a  very  comfor- 
table Time  to  me.  There  were  many  Tears  in  the  Affembly  ; 
and  I  doubt  not  but  that  the  Spirit  of  God  was  there,  convincing 
poor  Sinners  of  their  need  of  Chrifl.—  \:\  the    Evening,  I  felt 
compofed,  and  comfortable,  tho'  much  tired  :  I  had  i<^vo.t  fweet 
Senfe  of  the  Excellency  and   Glory  of  God  ;  and  my  Soul  r?'^ 
jovced,  that    he  was   God  over  all,   hUJJ'ed  forever  ;  but  was.t<>® 
i«uch  Cfoudtd  vviih  fj-jm^any  and  C'onverfation,  and  io»g€^'' 

to 


(?/iHr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.1745.     j^y 

to  be  more  alone  with  God.  Oh  that  I  could  forever  blefs  God 
for  the  Mercy  of  this  Day,  who  anfwered  me  in  the  Joy  of  my 
Heart. 

[The  reft  of  this  V/eek  feems  to  have  been  fpent  under  a 
Decay  of  this  Life  and  Joy,  and  in  diftreffing  Conflifts  with 
Corruption  ;  but  not  without  fome  Seafons  of  Refrefhment 
and  Comfort.] 

Lord's-Day,  Feb,  24.  In  the  Morning,  was  much  perplex'd  : 
My  Interpreter  being  abfent,  I  knew  not  how  to  perform  my 
Work  among  the  Indians,  However,  I  rode  to  the  Indians^  got 
a  Dutch' Man  to  Interpret  for  me,  tho'  he   was  but  poorly  qua- 
lified for  the  Bufinefs.     Afterwards,  I  came  and  preach'd  to  a 
few  white  People  from  Johnv'u  67.    Here  the  Lord  feemed  to 
unburden  me  in  fome  Meafure  ;  efpecially  towards  the  clofe  of 
rny  Difcourfe  :  I  felt  Freedom  to  open  rhe  LeveofChriJi  to  his 
own  dear  Difciples  :  When  the  reft  of  the  World  for  fakes  him, 
and  ^TQforfaken  by  him,    that  he  calls  them  no   more,  he  then 
turns  to  his  own,  and   fays.  Will  ye  otfjgo  away  /  I  had  a  Senfe 
of  the  free  Grace  of  Chrift  to  his  own  People,  in  fuch  Seafons 
of  general  Apoftacy,  and  when  they  themfelves  in  fome   Mea- 
fure backflide  with  the  World.     O  the  free  Grace   of  Chrift, 
that  he  feafonably  minds  his  People  of  their  Danger  of  Back- 
flidingy  and  invites  them  to  perfevere  in  their  Adherence  to  him- 
felf !  I  faw  that  backjliding  Souls,  who  feem'd  to  be  about  logo 
away  with  the  World,  might  return,  and  welcome,  to  him  im- 
mediately  ;  without  any  Thing  to  recommend  them, ;  notwith- 
ftandingall  their  formerBackflidings.  And  thus  my  Difcourfe  was 
fuited  to  my  own  Soul's  Cafe  :  For,of  late,  I  have  found  a  great 
want  of  this  Senfe  and  Apprehenfion  of  divincGrace  ;   and  have 
often  been  greatly  diftrefs'd  in  my  own  Soul,  becaufe  I  did   not 
fultably  apprehend  this  Fountain  open' d  to  purge  away  Sin  ;  and  fo 
have  been  too  much  labouring  for  fpiritual  Life,  Peace  of  Ccn- 
fcience,  and  progreflive  Holinefs,  in  my  own  Strength  :  But 
now  God  (hewed  me,  in  fome  Meafure,  the  Jrmof  all  Strength, 
and  the  Fountain  of  nW  Grace.—-  In  the  Evening,  I  felt  folemn, 
devout,  and  fweet,  refting  on  free  Grace  for  Ailiftance,  Accep- 
tance, andPeage  of  Confcience. 

[  Within  the  Space  of  the  next  nine  Days,  he  had  frequent 
refrefhing,  invigorating  Influences  of  God's  Spirit;  attended 
withComplaintof  Dulijefs,  and  withLongings  after  fpiritualLife 
*.n:!  holy  Fexvency.J 

Wednefday^ 


M^      ^V.  27:  "  fX^  L  I  F  E 

Wednefday,  March  6.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  preparing 
fsr  a  Journey  to  New- England.  Spent  fome  Time  in  Prayer, 
with  a  fpecial  Reference  to  my  intended  Jouxney.  Was  afraid 
I  fhould  forfake  ihcFountain  of  livinglVaten ^h  attempt  to  derive 
Satisfadtion  from  brokenCiJierns^my  dearFriends&Acquaintance, 
with  whom  I  might  meet  in  my  Journey.  1  looked  to  God 
to  keep  me  from  ihisFanity  in  fpecial, as  well  as  others.  Towards 
Night,  and  in  the  £vening,was  vifited  by  fome  Friends,  fome  of 
whom,  I  truft,  wepe  real  Chriftians  ;  who  difcovered  an  af- 
fcdionate  Regard  to  me,  and  feem'd  grieved  that  I  was  about 
to  leave  them  ;  efpecially  feeing  I  did  not  expe6l  to  make  any 
confiderable  Stay  among  them,  if  I  fhould  Vive  to  return  from 
New-England.  *  O  ho^w  kind  has  God  been  to  me  1  How  has 
he  raifed  up  Friends  in  every  Place,  where  his  Providence  has 
called  me  I  Friends  are  a  great  Comfort ;  and  'tis  God  that 
gives  them  ;  'tis  be  makes  them  friendly  to  me.  BUfs  the  Lordy 
O  my  Souly  and  forget  not  all  his  Benefit u 

f  The  next  Day,  he  (Qt  out  on  his  Journey  :  And  it  was 
about  five  Weeks  before  he  returned.—-  The  fpecial  Dcfign  of 
this  Journey,  he  himfelf  declares  afterwards^  in  his  Diary  for 
March  21.  Where,  fpeaking  of  his  converfing  with  a  certain 
Minifter  in  New- England,  he  fays  thus,  Contrived  with  him  how 
to  raifefome  Money  among  Chrifiian  Friends  ^  in  order  to  fupport  a 
Colleague  with  me  in  the  IViliernejs^  (  1  having  now  fpent  twoTears 
in'avery  folitary  Manner)  that  we  might  be  together  ;  as  Chrififent 
out  hisDifciples^  two  and  two  :  And  as  this  was  the  principal  Con^ 
cern  I  had  in  View,  in  taking  this  Journey^  fo  1  took  Pains  in  /*/, 
und  hope  God  will  fucceed  it,  if  for  his  Glory.  He  firft  went  into 
various  Parts  of  NeW'Jerfey,?Lnd  vifited  feveralMinifters  there  : 
And  then  went  to  New-Tor k  ;  and  from  thence  into  New-tng- 
land,  going  to  various  Parts  of  Conne^icut :  And  then  returned 
into Ne W' J er fey  :  He  met  aNumber  of  Minifters  at  IFoodbridge^ 
ivho  (he  fays)  met  there  to  confult  about  the  Affairs  of  Chri/i's  King- 
dom^ in  fome  important  Articles.  He  feems,  for  the  molt  Part,  to 
have  been  free  from  Melancholy  in  this  Journey  ;  and  many 
Times  to  have  had  extraordinary  Affiftance  in  publick  Miniltra- 
tions,  and  his  preaching  fometiraes  attended  with  very  hopeful 


*  It  feems,  he  had  a  Defign^  by  what  afterwards  appears, 
to  remove  and  live  among  thg  Jndiar\i  at  Sujfjuahannah-* 
River, 

Appear^ncej 


<?/  Mr.  David  Bralncrd.     'A. D.  1 745;       1 49 

Appearances  of  a  good  EfFeft  on  the  Auditory.  He  alfo  had 
many  Seafons  of  fpecial  Comfort  and  fpiritual  Refrefhment^  in 
Converfation  with  Minifters  and  other  Chriftian  Friends,  and 
alfo  in  Meditation  and  Prayer  by  himfelf  alone.] 

Saturday,  jfpril  13.  Rode  Home  to  my  own  Houfe  at  the 
Forks  of  Delawaie  :  Was  enabled  to  remember  the  Goodnefs  of 
the  Lord,  who  has  now  preferved  me  while  riding  full  600  Miles 
in  this  Journey  ;  has  kept  me  that  none  of  my  Bones  have  been 
broken.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord,  who  has  preferved  me  in  this 
tedious  Journey,  and  returned  me  in  Safety  to  my  own  Houfe. 
Verily  'tis  God  that  has  upheld  me,  and  guarded  my  Goings. 

Lord's-Day,  April  i^.  Was  difordered  in  Body  with  the 
'Fatigues  of  my  latejourney  ;  but  was  enabled  however  to  preach 
fo  a  confiderable  AlTembly  of  white  People,  gathered  from  all 
Parts  round  about, with  fome  Freedom,  from  Ezek.  xxxiii.  11, 
As  1  live,  faith  the  Lord  Gody  Sec,  had  much  moie  AfHftance 
than  I  expe(Sed. 

I  This  Week,  he  went  a  Journey  to  Philadelphia,  m  order 
to  engage  the  Governour  there  to  ufe  his  Intereft  with  the  Chief 
Man  of  the  Six  Nations,  {  with  whom  he  maintained  a  llrict 
Frfend{hip)that  he  would  give  himLcav^e  to  Uve  ztSufquahannah.^ 
and  inflrudt  the  Indians  that  are  within  their  Territories.  *  in 
his  Way  to  and  from  thence,  he  lodged  with  Mr.  Beaty,  a 
young  Prefbyterian  Minif^er.  He  fpeaks  df  Seafons  of  fweel 
fpiritual  Refrefhment,  that  he  enjoyed  at  his  Lodgings] 

Saturday,  April  20.  Rode  with  Mr.  Beafy  to  Abington^  to 
attend  Mr.  TnaC^  Adminiftration  of  the  Sacrament,  accoe'-ding 
to  the  Method  of  the  Church  of  Scotland.  When  we  arrived^ 
we  found  M.r.Treat  preaching  ;  Afterw2rds  I  preached  aSsrmoii 
from  Maith.  v.  3.  Bleffed  an  the  Paor  in  Spirit,  5c c.  Gcd  was 
pleafed  to  give  me  great  Freedom  auJ  Tendernefs,  both  inPra^- 
er  and  Sermon  ;  The  Aflbmbly  was  (weeily  melted,  and  Scores 


The  Indians  ziSufquahannah  are  a  mix'dCompany  of  many 
Nation^-,  fpeaking  various  Languages,  and  few  Oi  'em  pro- 
perly of  the  Six  Nations.  But  yet  the  Country  having 
formerly  been  conquered  by  the  Six  Nations,  they  claim 
the  Land';  and  the  Sufquah'innah-Inciiav.i.  are  a  kind  of 
Vafiah  to  them. 

were     ', 


"150    ^/.  28.  7^^  LIFE 

were  all  in  Tears.  It  was,  as  I  then  hoped  and  was  afterwar(?3> 
abundantly  fatisfied  by  converfing  with  them,  a  Word  fpoken  in 
Sea  [on  to  many  weary  Souh.  I  was  extremely  tired,  and  my  Spi- 
rits much  exhaufted,  fo  that  I  could  fcarcely  fpeak  loud  j  yet  I 
could  not  help  rejoicing  in  God. 

Lords-Day,  jfprilii.  In  the  Morning,  was  calm  and  com* 
pofed,and  had  fome  out-goings  of  Soul  afterGod  in  fecretDutieSj 
and  longing  Defires  of  his  Prefence  in  the  SunSiuary  and  at  his 
Table  ;  that  his  Prefence  might  be  in  the  Afiembly  ;  and  that 
his  Children  might  be  cntertain'd  with  a  Fea/i  of  fat  Things,-"' 
In  the  Forenoon, Mr.  Treat  preach'd.  I  felt  fome  AfFe6tion  and 
Tcndernefs  in  the  Seafon  of  tbeAdminifh-ation  of  theOrdinance- 
Mr.  ^eaty  preached  to  the  Multitude  abroad,  who  could  not 
half  havecrouded  into  the  Meeting-Houfe.  In  the  Seafon  of  the 
Communion,  I  had  comfortable  and  fweet  Apprehenfions  of  the 
blifsful  Communion  of  God's  People,  when  they  fliall  meet  at 
tlieir  Father's  Table  in  his  Kingdom,  in  a  State  of  Perfection.— 
In  theAfternoon,  I  preach'd  abroad  to  the  whole  Aflembly5from 
Rev*  xiv.  4.  Tbefe  are  they  that  follow  the  Lamb,  &c.  God  was 
pleafed  again  to  give  me  very  great  Freedom  and  Clearnefs,  but 
notfo  much  Warmth  as  before.  However, there  was  a  moft  a- 
mazing  Attention  in  the  whole  AfTembly  ;  and,  as  I  was  in- 
formed afterwards,  this  was  a  fweet  Seafon  to  many. 

Monday,  Jpr,  22.  I  enjoy'd  fome  Swcetnefs  inRetiremenf, 
in  the  Morning.  >j^t  eleven  o'Clock,  Mr.  Beaiy  preach'd,witb 
Freedom  and  Life.  Then  1  preach'd  from  "foh,  vii.  37.  and 
concluded  the  Solemnity.  Had  fome  Freedom  ;  but  not  equal 
to  whst  I  had  enjoyed  before  :  Yet  m  thePraver,  the  Lord  ena- 
bled' me  to  cry  (  I  hope)  with  a  Child-like  Temper,  withTen- 
dernefs  and  Brokennefs  of  Heart.---  CameHome  with  Mr, Seaiy 
to  his  Lodgings ;  and  fpent  the  Time,  while  riding,  and  after- 
wards, very  agreably  on  divine  Things. 

Tuefday,  Jpril  23.  Left  Mr.  ^eaty^s,  and  returned  Home  to 
the  Forks  ot  Delaware  :  Enjoyed  fome  fweet  Meditations,  on 
the  Road,  and  was  enabled  to  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God  inPrayer 
and  Praife. 

[  The  two  next  Days,  hefpeaksof  much  bodily  Difordefj 
but  of  fome  Degrees  of  fpiritual  Affiftance  and  Freedom,  j 

Friday,  April  26.  Converfed  with  a  Chriftian  Friend  mi% 
fnrreVVarmth  j  and  felt  a  Spirit  of  Mortification  to  theWorld-j^ 
in  a  \QTy  great  Degree,     Afterwards^  was  enabled  t9  pray^«*r' 

vent'/ 


of  Mr.  D^vid  Brainerd.    A.D.  1745.     Y^i 

Vcntlyj  and  to  rely  on  God  fweetly,  for  all  Things  pertaining  u 
Life  and  Godlinefs,  Juft  in  the  Evening,  was  viiited  by  a  dear 
Chriftian  Friend,  with  whom  1  fpent  an  Hour  or  two  in  Con- 
verfation,  on  the  very  Soul  of  Religion.  There  are  many  with 
whom  I  can  talk  about  Religion  :  But  alas,  1  find  fev&  with  whom 
I  cm  ii[\i  Religion  it  felf :  But,  blefled  be  the  Lord,  there  are 
Tome  that  love  to  feed  on  the  Kernel,  rather  than  the  Shell. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  went  to  the  Iri/h  Settlement,  often  be- 
fore mentioned,  about  15  Miles  diftant  ;  where  he  fpent  the 
Sabbath,  and  preached  with  fome  confiderable  Affiftance.  On 
Monday,he  returned, in  a  very  wcakState,to  his  ownLodgiBgs.l 

* 

Tuefday,  jfpril  30.  Was  fcarce  able  to  walk  about,  and  was 
obliged  to  betake  my  felf  to  the  Bed,  much  of  the  Day  j  and 
fpent  away  the  Time  in  a  very  folitary  Manner  ;  being  neither 
able  to  read,  meditate,  nor  pray,  and  had  none  to  converfe 
within  that  Wildernefs.  Oh,  how  heavily  does  Time  pafs 
away,  when  I  can  do  nothing  to  any  good  Purpofe  5  but  feem 
obliged  to  trifle  away  precious  Time  !  But  of  late,  I  have  (ttn 
it  my  Duty  to  divert  my  felf  by  all  lawful  Means,  that  I  may  be 
fit,  at  leaft  fome  fmall  Part  of  my  Time,  to  labour  for  God. 
And  here  is  the  Difference  between  my  prefent  Divcrfions,  and 
thofe  I  once  purfued,  when  in  a  natural  State.  Then  I 
made  a  god  of  Diverfions,  delighted  in  them  with  a  NegleiSl  of 
God,  and  dreiv  my  higbeft  Satisfad^ion  from  them  :  Now  I  ufe 
them  as  Means  to  help  me  in  living  to  God  ;  fixedly  delighting 
fn  Him^  and  not  in  them,  drawing  my  higheft  Satisfadion  from 
Him*  Then  they  were  my  Jll ;  now  they  are  only  Means 
leading  to  my  JIL  And  thofe  Things  that  are  the  greateft  Di- 
verfion,  when  purfued  with  this  View,  don't  tend  to  hinder, buc 
promote  my  Spirituality  ;  and  I  fee  now,  more  than  ever,  that 
they  are  abfolutely  necefTary. 

Wednefday,  A/ay  i.  Was  not  able  to  fit  up  more  than  half 
the  Day  ;  and  yet  had  fuch  Recruits  of  Strength  fometimes^ 
that  I  was  able  to  write  a  little  on  a  divine  Subjedt,  Was 
grieved  that  I  could  no  more  live  to  God.  In  the  Evening, 
had  fome  Sweetnefs  and  Intenfenefs  in  fecret  Prayer. 

Thurfday,  May  2.  In  the  Evening,  being  a  little  better  In 
Health,  I  walk'd  into  the  Woods,  and  enjoyed  a  fweet  Seafon 
of  Meditation  and  Prayer.  My  Thoughts  run  uponP/^/.xvii.  15. 
J.  Jhall  befatufiedy  when  I  awake  with  thfLikenefs,  And  it  was 
'fldeed  a  preciou&Text  to  me.     1  long'd  to  preach  to  the  whole 

X         '  "  World; 


Tsi  mLi%:        !rj<f  LIFE 

World  :  And  it  feem*d  to  me,  they  muft  needs  all  be  melted 
in  hearing  fuch  precious  divineTruths, as  I  had  then  aView  and 
Relifh  of.  MyThoughts  were  exceeding  clear,and  my  Soul  was 
refrefhed.  ---BleiTed  be  the  Lord,  that  in  my  late  &  prefent 
Weaknefs,  now  for  many  Days  together,  my  Mind  is  not  gldo- 
my,  as  at  fome  other  Times. 

Friday,  May  3.  Felt  a  little  Vigour  of  Body  and  Mind,  in 
the  Morning :  Had  fome  Freedom,  Strength,  and  Sweetnefs 
in  Prayer.  Rode  to  and  fpent  fome  Time  with  my  Indians^ 
In  the  Evening,  again  retiring  into  the  Woods,  I  enjoyed  feme 
fweet  Meditations  on  Ifaiah  liii«  i.  Tet  it  pleofed  the  Lord  to 
brulje  him^  &c. 

[  The  three  nextDays  were  fpent  in  much  weaknefs  of  Body  : 
But  yet  he  enjoyedfomeAffiftance  in  publick  and  privateDuties : 
and  feems  to  have  remained  free  from  Melancholy.] 

Tuefday,  May  7.  Spent  the  Day  mainly  in  making  Prepa- 
ration for  a  Journey  into  the  Wildernefs.  Was  flijl  weak,  and 
concerned  how  I  fhould  perform  fo  difficult  a  Journey.  Spent 
fome  Time  in  Prayer  for  the  divine  Bleffing,  Diredion  and 
Protedtion  in  my  intended  Journey ;  but  wanted  bodily  Strength 
to  fpend  the  Day  in  Falling  and  Prayer. 

[The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  his  Journey  to  Sufquahannah^ 
with  his  Interpreter.  He  endured  great  Hardfhips  &  Fatigues 
in  his  Way  thither  thro'  a  hideous  Wildernefs  ;  where,  after 
having  lodged  one  Night  in  the  open  Woods,  he  was  overtaken 
with  a  North- Eaflerly  Storm,  in  which  he  was  almoft  ready  to 
perifh.  Having  no  Manner  of  Shelter,  and  not  being  able  to 
make  a  Fire  in  fo  great  a  Rain,  he  could  have  no  Comfort  if  he 
ftopt ;  therefore  determined  to  go  forward,  in  Hopes  of  meeting 
with  fomeShelter,  without  which  he  tho't  it  impoilible  he  (hould 
live  thcNight  thro' :  But  theirHorfes  hap'ning  to  have  eatPoifon 
(for  want  of  otherFood)  at  a  Place  where  they  lodged  the  Night 
l)efore,were  fo  Tick  that  they  could  neither  ride  nor  lead  'em, but 
"weic  obliged  to  drive  *em  before  them, and  travel  onFoot ;  until 
thro*  theMercy  of  God  (juft  atDufkjthey  came  to  aBark-Hutr, 
where  they  lodged  thatNight.  Atter  he  came  ioSufquahannah^ho 
travelled  about  theLength  of  an  lOoMiles  on  theRiver,&  vifited 
JnanyTowns  &  Settlements  of  theJndians ;  faw  fome  of  7  or  8 
diftin<5i  Tribes  ;  and  preached  to  difFerentNations,  by  different 
Interpreters.  He  was  fometimss  much  difcouraged,  arid  funk 
zn  his  Spirit?,  thro*  iks  Oppolitigq  thst  appeared  in  the*  hdiant 


'of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1745.     15^ 

,to  Chriftianity.  At  other  Times,  he  was  encouraged  by  the 
,  Difpofition  that  feme  of  thefq  People  manifefted  to  hear,  and 
Wiliingnefs  to  be  inftrufte4.  He  here  met  with  fome  that  had 
formerly  been  his  Hearers  at  Kaunaumeeh^  and  had  removed  hi- 
ther ;  who  faw  and  heard  him  again  with  great  Joy.  He  fpent 
a  Fortnight  among  the  Indiam  on  this  River  ;  and  pafs'd  thro* 
confiderable  Labours  and  Hardfliips,  frequently  lodging  on  the 
Ground,  and  fometimcs  in  the  open  Air  ;  And  at  length  he  fell 
extremely  III,  as  he  was  Riding  in  the  Wildernefs,  being  feized 
with  anAgue,  followed  with  a  burning  Fever, and  extremePains 
in  his  Head  and  Bowels,  attended  with  a  great  Evacuation  of 
Blood  J  fo  that  he  tho*t  hemuft  have  perifhed  in  theWilderncfs: 
But  at  laft  coming  to  an  Indian  Trader's  Hutt,  he  got  Leave  to 
ftay  there  ;  and  tho'  without  Phyfick  or  Food  proper  for  him,  it 
pleafed  Godjafter  about  aWeek's  Diftrefs,  to  relieve  him  fo  far 
that  he  was  able  to  ride^  He  returned  homewards  from  Ja«- 
tauta^  an  Ifland  far  down  the  River  ^  where  was  a  confiderable 
Number  of  Indians^  who  appeared  more  free  from  Prejudices  a- 
gainft  Chriftianity, than  moft  of  the  other  Indians,  He  arrived  at 
theForks  o(  Delaware  on  Thurfday-^-3y  30, after  having  rode  in 
this  Journey  about  34oMiles.  f  He  cameHome  in  a  very  weak 
State, &  underDeje6lion  of  Mind  5  which  was  a  greatHindranCe 
to  him  in  religious  Exercifes.  However,  on  the  Sabbath,  after 
having  preach'd  to  the  Indians,  he  preach'd  to  the  white  People, 
with  fome  Succefs,  from  Jfai,  liij.  10.  Te<  it  pleafed  the  Lord  t a 
bruife  him^  ^c.  fome  being  awakened  by  his  preaching.  The 
next  Day,  he  was  mu<:h  e;iercifed  for  want  of  fpiritual  Life 
and  Forvency.] 

Tuefday,  June  4.  Towards  Evening,  was  in  Diftrefs  for 
God*s  Prefence  and  a  Senfe  of  divine  Things :  Withdrew  my 
felf  to  the  Woods,  and  fpent  near  an  Hour  in  Prayer  and  Me- 
ditation ;  and  I  think,  the  Lord  had  CompafTion  on  me,  and 
gave  me  fome  Senfe  of  divine  Things  ;  which  was  indeed  re- 
frefti-ing  &  quick'ning  to  me  :  MySoul  enjoyed  Intenfenefs  and 
Freedom  in  Prayer,  fo  that  it  grievM  me  to  leave  the  Place. 

Wednefday,  June  5.  Felt  thirfting  Defires  after  God,  in 
the  Morning.  In  the  Evening,enjoyed  a  precious  Seafon  ofRe- 
tiremgijt :  Was-favoured  with  fome  clcaj:  and  fweetMeditations 
upon  a  facrcd  Text ;  DivineThings  open'd  with  Clearnefs  and 


t  This  is  the  Journey  which  he  occafionally  mentions  in  his 
primed  Joar/igl^  P#  53»-56» 

X  t  Certaiftty 


154    Mt:i%.  r/&^LIFE 

Certainty,  and  had  a  divine  Stamp  upon  thero  f  My  Soul  was 
alfo  enlarged  and  refrefh*d  inPrayer  ;  and  I  delighted  to  continue 
in  the  Duty  ;  and  was  fsveetly  afHfted  in  praying  for  Fellow- 
Chriftians,  and  my  dear  Brethren  in  the  Miniftry.  Blefledbc 
the  dear  Lord  for  fuch  Enjoyments.  O  how  fweet  &  precious 
it  is,  to  have  a  clear  Apprehenfion  &  tcnderSenfe  of  the  My/iery 
of  Goalinefsy  of  true  Holinefs,  &  Likenefs  to  the  beft  of  Beings  ! 
O  what  a  BlefTednefs  it  is,  to  be  as  much  like  God,  as  'tis  poifi- 
ble  for  a  Creature  to  be  like  his  great  Creator  !  Lord,  give  me 
more  of  ^^y  Likenefs  :  I  (hall  he  fatisjied,  when  I  awake  with  it. 
Thurfday,  June  6  Was  engaged,  a  confiderable  Part  of  the 
Day,  in  Meditation  and  Study  on  divine  Subjects.  Enjoyed 
fome  fpecial  Freedom,  Clearnefs,  and  Sweetnefs  in  Meditation. 
O  how  refrefhing  it  is,  to  be  enabled  to  improve  Time  well  ! 

[  The  next  Day,  he  went  a  Journey  of  near  fifty  Miles  to 
2sJeft)amingy  to  aflift  at  a  Sacramental  Occafion,  to  be  attended  at 
Mr.  Beaiy's  Meeting- Houfe  s  being  invited  thither  by  him  and 
his  People,  j 

Saturday,  June  8.  Was  exceeding  weak  and  fatigued  with 
Riding  in  the  HeatYefterday  :  But  being  defired,  I  preached  in 
the  Afternoon,  to  a  crouded  Audience,  from  Jfai.  xl.  i.  Comfort 
ycy  Comfort  ye  my  People^  faith  your  God.  God  was  pleafed  to 
give  me  great  Freedom,  in  opening  the  Sorrows  of  God's  Peo- 
ple, and  in  fetting  before  them  comfortingConfiderations.  And, 
blefied  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  fweet  melting  Seafon  in  the  AfTem- 
biy. 

Lord's-Day,  June  c^.  Felt  fome  longing  Defires  of  the  Pre- 
fence  of  God  to  be  with  his  People  on  the  folemnOccafion  of  the 
Day.  In  the  Forenoon,  Br.  Beaty  preached  ;  and  there  appear- 
ed fome  Warmth  in  the  AfTembly.  Afterwards,  I  afHfted  in  the 
Adminittration  of  the  Lord's  Supper  :  And  towards  the  clofe  of 
it,  I  difcoarfed  to  the  Multitude  eatempore^  with  fomeReferencc 
to  that  facred  PafTagc  Ifai.  liii.  lO.  Tet  it  pleafed  the  Lord  to  bruife 
Him,  Here  God  gave  me  great  Afliftance  in  addreffingiinners : 
And  the  Word  was  attended  with  amazingPower  ;  manyScores, 
li  not  Hundreds,  in  that  great  AfTembly,  confifting  of  three  or 
foul-  Thoufand,  were  much  afFeded  ;  fo  that  there  was  a  very 
vr/nt  Alourningy  like  the  Adourning  of  Hadadrimmon.  — -  In 
the  Evening,  I  could  hardly  look  any  Body  in  the  Face,  be- 
\-aufe  of  the  Imperfedlions  I  faw  yfjIfkM  Performances   in  the 

Monday^ 


oj  Mi:  David  Brainerd.    A.D.  1 745.      155 

Monday,  June  10.  Preacb'd  with  a  good  Degree  of  Clearners 
and  feme  fwcet  Warmth,  from  Pfal.  xvii.  15.  Ijhall  he  fath^ 
^ed^  when  1  awake  with  thy  Likenefs,  And  blefled  beGod, there 
was  a  greatSoleiiinity,and  Attention  in  the  Afiembly,  and  fweet 
Refreflimcnt  among  God's  People  ;  as  was  evident  then,  and 
afterwards. 

Tucfday,  June  i  r.  Spent  the  Day  mainly  in  Converfatloil 
•with  dear  Chriftian  Friends  ;  and  enjoyed  fome  fweet  Senfe  of 
divine  Things.  O  howd'efirable  itrs,  to  keep  Company  with 
<jod's  dear  Children  !  TheCc  arc  the  exreilent  (Dnes  0/ the  Earthy 
in  whom^  I  can  truJy  fay,  is  oil  my  Delight,  O  v/hat  Delight 
will  it  afford,  to  meet  them  all  in  a  State  of  Perfedion  !  Lord, 
prepare  mc  for  that  State. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  left  Mr.5^ff/>'s,and  went  to  Maidenhead 
in  New  J  erf ey,  and  fpent  the  next  feven  Days  in  a  com- 
fortable State  of  Mind,  vifiting  feveral  Minifters  in  thofe  Parts.] 

Tuefday,  June  i^.  Set  out  from  New-Brunfwick  with  a 
Defign  to  vifit  fome  Indians  at  a  Place  called  Crofweekjung  in 
New-Jerfey^  towards  the  Sea.  f  In  the  Afternoon,  came  to  a 
Place  called  Cranberry^  and  meeting  with  a  ferious  Minifter, 
Mr.  Mc  Nighty  I  lodged  there  with  him.  Had  fome  Enlarge- 
ment and  Freedom  in  Prayer  with  a  Number  of  People. 


f  Mr.  Brainerd  having,  when  at  Bofton^  wrote  and  left  with 
a  Friend  a  brief  Relation  of  Fa6!s  touching  hisLabours  with 
the  Indians  2nd  Reception  among  them,  during  the  Space 
of  Time  between  Nov.  5.  1744,  and  Ju^e  19.  1745.  (with 
a  View  to  connect  his  Narrative,  at  the  End  of  Mr.  Pern- 
berton^s  Ordination-Sermon,  and  his  Journal,  in  Cafe  they 
fhouldever  be  reprinted)  concludes  the  fame  with  this 
PafTage  :  yfj  my  Body  was  very  feeble,  fa  myMin^  was  fear  ce 
ever  fo  much  damped  and  difcourag'd  about  the  Converfton  of 
the  Indians,  as  at  this  Time,  And  in  this  State  of  Body  and 
Mind  J  made  my  firji  Viftt  to  the  Indians  in  New- Jerfcy, 
where  God  was  ■pleas'' d  to  difplay  his  Power  i^  Grace  in  the 
remarkable  Manner  that  I  have  reprefented  in  my  printed 
Journal, 


PART 


y^S    Mt.zi.  Tie  LIFE 


Part     VIL 

From  his  Jirji  Beginning  to  preach  to  the 
Indians  at  Crofweekfung,  V/7/  he  r^- 
turrid  from  his  lajl  Journey  to  Sufqua- 
hannah  ill  with  the  Confumption^  whereof 

'"     he  died. 


r  IT  7  E  are  now  come  to  that  Part  of  Mr.  Brainerd'z  Ufe^ 
L  VV  wherein  he  had  his  greateft  Succefs^  in  his  Labours  for 
the  good  of  Souls,  and  in  his  particular  Bufinefs  as  a 
IVliiTionary  to  the  Indians »  An  Account  of  which,  if  here  pub- 
lifh'd,  would  doubtlefs  be  very  entertaining  to  the  Reader,  after 
he  hasfeen  by  the  preceeding  Parts  of  this  Account  of  his  Life, 
how  great  and  long-continued  his  Defires  for  the  fpiritual  Good 
of  this  Sort  of  People  were,how  he  prayed, labouredj^c  wrefUed, 
9nd  how  much  he  denied  himfelf  and  (uiFered,to  this  End.  After 
all  Mr.  Brainerd's  agonizing  in  Prayer,  and  travailing  in  Birth, 
(or  the  Converfion  of  Indians^  and  all  the  Inteichanges  of  his 
raifed  Hopes  and  Expedations,  and  then  Difappointments  and 
Difcouragcments  ;  and  after  waiting  in  a  Way  of  perfevering 
Prayer,  Labour  and  Suffering,  as  it  were  through  a  \ongNight  ; 
at  length  the  Day  dawns :  IVeeping  continues  for  a  Night,  but  Joy 
comes  in  the  Morning,  Me  went  forth  weepings  bearing  precious 
tleed^  and  now  he  comes  with  Rejoycinvy  bringing  his  Sheaves 
with  him.  The  defircd  Event  is  bro't  to  pafs  at  laft  ;  but  at  a 
Time, in  a  Place,and  uponSubje<3s,that  fcarce  ever  entered  into 
his  Heart.  An  Account  of  this  would  undoubtedly  now  much 
gratify  the  Chriflian  Reader :  And  it  fhould  have  been  here  in- 
ferred,  as  it  (lands  in  his  Diary,  had  it  not  been,  that  a  particu- 
lar Account  of  this  glorious  and  wonderful  Succefs  was  drawn 
up  b;  Mr.  ^r^/W^  himfelf,  purfuant  to  the  Order  of  the  ho- 
nourable Society  in  Scotland^  and  publifh'd  by  him  in  his  Life- 
time 5  v/hich  Account  many  have  in  flicir  Hands  j    and  tbein- 

fcrtinc^ 


'6f  Mr,  David  Braincrd:      A.D. 1 745:    i^j 

Iferting  it  here  would-  too  much  fwell  this  Book,  ag  was  faid 
before  in  the  Preface.  However,  I  look  upon  the  want  of  this 
Account  here,  as  a  real  Defe6l  in  this  Hiftory  of  Mr.  Braimrd's 
Life  ;  which,  I  v/ould  hope,  thofe  of  my  Readers,  who  are  not 
already  poffefs'd  of  his  publick  Journal,  will  fupply,  by  procur- 
ing one  of  thofe  Books,  that  they  mayn't  be  without  that  which 
in  fome  Refpeds  is  the  moft  remarkable,  and  to  a  Chriftian 
Mind  would  be  the  moft  pleafantPart  of  the  wholeStory.  That 
theReader  who  is  furnifh'd  with  one  of  thofe  Books, may  know 
the  Place  where  the  Defers  of  thisHiftory  are  to  be  fupplied  from 
thence,   I  fhall  either  exprefly  obferve  it  as  I  go  along,  or  elfe 

make  a  dafli  or  ftroke  thus Which  when  the  Reader  finds 

in  this  7th  Part  of  this  Hiftory,he  is  to  underftand  by  it,  that  in 
that  Place  fomething  in  Mr.  Brainerd'i  Diary^vrorth  obferving, 
is  lift  out,  becaufe  the  fame  for  Subftance  was  publifhed  before 
in  his  printed  Journal.] 

Wednefday  June  19.  1745.  Rode  to  the  Indians  at  Crofweek* 
fung  :  Found  few  at  Home  :  Difcourfed  to  them  however  ;  and 
obferved  them  very  ferious  and  attentive.  At  Night  I  was  ex- 
treamly  worn  out,  and  fcarce  able  to  walk  or  fit  up.  Oh,  how 
tirefome  is  Earth  !    How  dull  the  Body  I 

Thurfday,  June  20.  Towards  Night,  preach'd  to  the  Indians 
again  ;  and  had  more  Hearers  than  before.  In  the  Evening, 
cnjoy'd  fome  Peace  and  Serenity  of  Mind,  fome  Compofure  and 
Comfort  in  Prayer  alone;  and  was  enabled  to  lift  up  my  Head 
with  fome  Degree  of  Joy,  under  an  Apprehenfioa  that  my  Re- 
demption draw*  nigh.  Oh,  blefTed  be  God,  that  there  remains 
a  Refi  to  his  poor  weary  People  ! 

Friday,  June  21.  Rode  toFre^boldyto  (eeMr  JVilliamTennent; 
and  fpent  the  Day  comfortably  with  him.  My  finking  Spirits 
were  a  little  raifed  and  encouraged  ;  and  I  felt  my  Soul  breath- 
ing after  God,  in  the  midft  of  Chriflian  Converfaiion.  And  in 
the  Evening, was  rcfrefh'd  in  fecret  Prayer  :  Saw  my  felf  a  poor 
worthlefs  Creature,  without  Wifdom  to  dire<5t,  or  Strength  to 
help  my  felf.  Oh,  blefTed  be  God,  that  lays  me  under  a  happy, 
a  blefTed  Ncceffity  of  living  upon  himfelf  ! 

Saturday,  June  22.  About  Noon, rode  to  the  Indians  again  -^ 
and  ncarNight,preach'd  to  'em.  Found  myBody  much  ftrength- 
en'd,and  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  abundantPlaioners&  Warmth. 
And  the  Power  of  God  evidently  attended  the  Word  ;  f>  that 
fundry  Perfons  were  brought  under  greatConcern  for  their  Souls* 
a«d  made  to  ihe<J  many  Tears,  and  to  wifh  for  Chrifl  to  favc 

ibera. 


158   JEt.  28:  W^LIFE 

them.  My  Soul  was  much  refrcfh'd,and  quicken'd,in  myWork^ 
andl  could  not  but  fpend  much  Time  with  them,  in  order  to 
open  both  their  Mifery  and  Remedy,  This  was  indeed  a  fweet 
Afternoon  to  me.  While  riding,  before  I  came  to  the  Indians^ 
my  Spirits  wererefrefh'd,  and  my  Soul  enabled  to  cry  to  God 
almoft  incefTantly,  for  many  Miles  together.  In  the  Evening 
alfo  I  found  the  Confolations  ofGod  were  not  fmall :  I  was  then 
willing  to  live,  and  in  feme  Refpedts  defirous  of  it,  that  I  might 
do  fomething  for  the  dear  Kingdom  of  Chrift  5  and  yet  Death 
appeared  pleafant :  So  that  I  was  in  fome  Meafure  in  a  Strait 
between  two,having  a  defire  to  depart.  I  am  often  weary  of 
this  World,  and  want  to  leave  it  on  that  Account :  But  'tis 
defirablc  to  be  drawn,  rather  than  driven  out  of  it. 

[  In  the  four  next  Days  is  nothing  remarkable  in  his  Diary, 
but  what  is  in  his  publick  Journal.  ] 

Thm((\zy,  June  27. MySoul  rejoiced, to  find,tbatGod  ena- 
bled me  to  be  faiihtul,  and  that  he  was  pleafed  to  awaken  thefc 
poor  Indians  by  my  Means.  O  how  Heart- reviving,  and  Soul- 
refrefhing  is  it  to  me  to  fee  the  Froit  of  my  Labours  ! 

Friday,  J'aw^  28. In  theEveningjmySoul  was  revived, and 

my  Heart  lifted  up  to  God  in  Prayer,  for  my  poor  Indians^  my 
Self  and  Friends,  and  the  dear  Church  of  God.  And  O  how  re- 
frefihing,  how  fweet  was  this  !  Blefs  the  Lord,  O  my  Soul,  and 
forget  not  his  Goodnefs  and  tender  Mercy. 

Saturday,  June2<^.  Preach'd  twice  to  the  Indians  i  and  could 
not  but  wonder  at  their  Serioufnefs,  and  the  Stridtnefs  of  their 

Attention. BlefTed  be  God,  that  has  inclined    their  Hearts 

to  hear.  And  O  how  refrefhing  it  is  to  me,  to  fee  them  attend 
withfuch  uncommon  Diligence  afid  AfFedtion,  with  Tears  in 
their  Eyes,  and  Concern  in  their  Hearts  !  In  theEvening, could 
not  but  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God  in  Prayer,  while  riding  to  my 
Lodgings :  And  biefled  be  his  Name,  had  AlTiftance  and  Free- 
dom.    O  how  much  better  than  Life  is  the  Prefence  of  God  1 

[  His  7);flry  gives  an  Account  of  nothing  remarkable  on  the 
two  next  Days,  befides  what  is  in  his  publick  Journal  ;  except- 
inghis  Heart's  being  lifted  up  with  Thankfulnefs,  rejoicing  in 
God,  i^c,-] 

Tuefday, y^/y  2.  Rode  from  xhtlndiam  toBrunfwick^  near  40 
Miles,  and  lodged  there.  Felt  my  Heart  drawn  *ut  after  God 
in  Prajer^  almoft  all  the  Forenoon  i  -efpecially  while  riding. 

And 


£?/ Afr.  David  Bramerd;        A.D.i;45:    i^^' 

And  in  the  Elyening,   could  not  help  crying  to  God  for  thofe 
poor  Indianfi  and  after  I  went  to  Bed,  my  Heart  continued  to 
go  out  to  God  for  them, 'till  I  dropM  afleep.    O  blcflcd  be  God  a 
that  I  may  pray  ! 

[  He  was  fo  beat  out  by  conftant  preaching  to  tbefe  Indianr, 
yielding  to  their  earneft  and  importunate  Defires,  that  he  found 
it  neceflary  to  give  himfelf  feme  Relaxation.  He  fpent  therefore 
about  a  Week  in  Neuf-^erfiy^zher  he  left  thefe  Indians,  vifiting 
fevcralMinifters,  and  performing  feme  neceflary  Bufinefs, before 
he  went  to  the  Forks  of  Delaware.  And  tho'  he  was  very  \veak 
inBody,  yet  he  feems  to  have  been  ftrongin  Spirit.  OnFri^y, 
July  12.  he  arrived  at  his  own  Haufe  ia  theForks  of  Delaware  ; 
continuing  (till  free  from  Melancholy  ;  from  Day  to  Day,  en- 
joying Freedom,  Affiftance  and  Refrefhment  in  the  inner  Man* 
But  on  Wednefday,  the  next  Week,  he  feems  to  have  had  fome 
melancholy  Thoughts  about  his  doing  fo  litUe  for  God  5  being 
fo  much  hindered  by  weaknefsof  Body.] 

Thurfday,  July  18.  Longed  to  fpend  the  little  Inch  of  Time 
I  have  in  the  World  more  for  God.  Felt  a  Spirit  of  Seriouf'^ 
nefs,  TendernefsjSweetners,  and  Devotion,  and  wifti'd  to  fpend 
the  whole  Night  in  Prayer  and  Communion  with  God. 

Friday,  July  19.  In  the  Evening,  walked  abroad  for  Prayer 
and  Meditation,  and  enjoyed  Compofure  and  Freedom  in  thefe 
fweet  Exercifes ;  efpecially  in  Meditation  on  Rev.  iii.  i2.  Him 
that  over  Cometh, will  1  make  a  Pillar  in  the  Temple  of  my  God  &c. 
This  was  then  a  delightful  Theme  to  me,  and  it  refrefhed  my 
Soul  to  dwell  upon  it.  Oh,  when  fliall  I  go  no  more  out  from 
the  Service  and  Enjoyment  of  the  dear  Lord  ?  Lord,  haften 
the  blefTed  Day. 

[  Within  the  Space  of  the  next  fix  Days,  he  fpeaks  of  much 
inward  Refrefliment  and  Enlargement,  from  Time  to  Time.] 

Friday,  July  26.  In  the  Evening,  God  was  pleafed  to  help 
me  in  Prayer,  beyond  what  I  have  experienced  for  fome  Time  ; 
efpecially  my  Soul  was  drawn  out  for  theEnlargement  of  Chrifl's 
Kingdom,  and  for  the  Converfion  of  my  poor  People  :  and  my 
Soul  relied  on  God  for  the  Accomplifhment  of  that  great  Work. 
Oh,how  fweet  were  theThoughts  of  Death  to  me  at  thisTime  ! 
Oh,  how  I  longed  to  be  with  Chrift,  to  be  imployed  in  the  glo- 
fious  Work  of  Angels,  and  with  an  Angel's  Freedom,  Vigour 

Y  and 


i£o    M.  29.  "Ihe  LIFE 

and  Delight !  And  yet  bow  willing  was  I  to  ftay  a  while  on 
Earth,  that  I  mig^it  do  Something,  if  the  Lord  pleafed,  for  his 
Intcreft  in  the  World  !  My  Soul,  my  very  Soul,  longed  for  the 
Ingathering  of  the  poor  Heathen  ;  and  I  cried  to  God  for  them 
moft  willingly  and  heanlly  ;  and  yet  becaufe  I  coald  not  but  cry. 
This  was  a  fweetSeafon  ;  for  I  had  fome  lively Tafte  of  Heaven, 
and  a  Temper  of  Mind  fuited  in  fome  Meafure  to  the  Employ- 
ments and  Entertainments  of  it.  My  Soul  was  grieved  to  leave 
the  Place  ;  but  my  Body  was  weak  and  vi^orq  out,  and  it  was 
near  nine  o'clock.  Oh,  I  longed  that  the  remaining  Part  of 
myLife  might  be  fill'd  up  with  moreFervency  andAftivity  in  the 
Tilings  of  God  !  Oh  the  inwardPeace,Compofure,  andGod-like 
Serenkyof  fuch  aFrame  !  Heaven  muft  ncedsdiffer  from  thisonly 
in  Degree,and  not  inKind.  Lord^ever  give  ms  this  Sread  of  Lifs, 
^  [  Much  of  this  Frame  feem'd  to  continue  the  next  Day.] 
.  Lord's-Day,  July  28.  In  the  Evening,  my  Soul  was  melted, 
and  my  Heart  brol^n,  with  aSenfeof  paftBarrennefsand  Dead- 
iiefs  :  And  Oh,  howl  then  longed  to  live  to  God,  and  bring 
forth  much  Fruit  to  his  Glory  I 

Monday,  July  29.  Was  much  exercifed  with  a  Senfe  of 
Vilenefs,  with  Guilt  and  Shame  before  God. 

[  For  other  Things  remarkable,  while  he  was  this  Time  at 
the  Forks  o^  Delaware ^ih^  Reader  mufl  be  refer'd  to  his  publick 
Journal,  As  particularly  for  hisLabours  andSuccefs  there  among 
the  Indians, 

On  Wednefday,  July  31.    He  fet  out  on  his  Return  to  Crof- 

weekfungyTivA  arrived  there  the  nextDay*     In  his  Way  thither, he 

had  longing  Defires  that  he  might  come  to  ih^lniians  therc,in  the 

fulnefio/the  BUJfing  oftheGcfpel  ofChri/i  ;  attended  with  a  Senfe 

of  his  own  great  Weaknefs^  Dependance  and  Wonhlefnefs.  J 

Friday,  Auguji  2,  In  the  Evening,  I  retired,  and  my  Soul 
wsrs  drawn  out  in  Prayer  to  God  ;  efpecially  for  my  poor  Peo- 
ple, to  whom  I  had  fent  Word  that  they  might  gather  together, 
that  I  might  preach  to  'em  the  next  Day.  I  was  much  enlarged 
in  Praying  for  their  faving  Converfion  ;  and  fcarce  ever  found 
my  Defires  of  any  Thing  of  this  Nature  fo  fenfibly  and  clearly 
(  to  my  own  SatisfacSlion)  difintereited,  and  free  from  felliffe 
Views.  It  feem'd  to  me,  1  had  no  Care,  or  hardly  any  Defire 
to  be  the  Inftrument  of  fo  glorious  a  Work,  as  I  wifh'd  and 
pray'd  for  among  the  Indians'.  If  the  blefled  W^ork  might  be 
accompliflied  to  ihe  Honour  of  God,  and  the  Enlargement  of 
the  dear  Redeemer's  Kingdom,  this  was  all  my  Dcfire  and 
Care;  and  for  this  Mercy  I  hoped,  but  with  Trembling,;  ^o\A 

felt 


e/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.1745.       161 

fek  what  7^^  exprelTes,  Chapter  ix,  16.  My  nUnz  Hopes,  re- 
fpCiSling  the  Converfion  of  the  Indiansy  have  been  fo  often  dafh- 
ed,  that  my  Spirit  is  as  it  were  brokenj  and  Courage  wafted, 
and  1  hardly  dare  hope. 

[  Concerning  his  Labours  and  marvellous  Succefs  amongft  the 
Jndiansyfov  the  following  16  Days,  let  the  Reader  fee  hispublick 
JournaL  The  Things  worthy  of  Note  in  his  Diary ^  not  there 
publiflied,  are  his  earneft  and  importunate  Prayers  for  the  In- 
digm^  and  the  Travail  of  his  Soul  for  them  from  Day  to  Day  ; 
and  his  great  Refrefhment  and  Joy  in  beholding  the  v/onderful 
Mercy  of  God,  and  the  glorious  Manifeftations  of  his  Power 
and  Grace  in  his  Work  among  them  ;  and  his  ardent  Thankf- 
givings  to  God  ;  his  Heart's  rejoycing  in  Chrif?:,  as  King  of 
his  Church,  and  King  of  his  Soul  -,  in  particular,  at  the  Sacra- 
ment of  the  Lord's  Supper,  at  Mr.  McJSIight\  Meeting- Houfe  ; 
aSenfeofhis  own  exceeding  Unvvorthinefs  j  which  fometimes 
was  attended  with  Deje(5tion  and  Melancholy.] 

Monday,  Aug,   ic^, Near  Noon,  I  rode  toFreehold^  and 

preach'd  to  a  confiderableAfTembly,  UoaniVlatth,  v. 3.  It  pleafed 
God  to  leave  me  to  be  very  dry  and  barren  ;  fo  that  I  don't  re- 
member to  have  been  To  ftraiten'd  for  a  whole  twelve  Month 
paft.  God  is  juft,  and  he  has  made  my  Soul  acquiefce  in  his 
Will  in  this  Regard.  'Tis  contrary  ioFleJh  and  Blood  to  be  cut 
ofFfrom  all  Freedom,  in  a  large  Auditory,  where  their  Expedta- 
tions  are  much  raifed  ;  but  ^o  it  was  with  me  :  AndGod  helped 
me  to  fay  Amm  to  it- ;  Good  is  theWill  of  the  Lord,  In  iheEven- 
ing,  I  felt  quiet  and  compofed,  and  had  Freedom  and  Comfort 
in  fecret  Prayer. 

Tuefday,  Aug,  20.  Was  compofed  and  comfortable,  flill 
in  a  refigned  Frame.  Travelled  from  Mr.  Tennent's  in  Freehold 
to  Elifabeth-Town,  Was  refrefh'd  to  fee  Friends,  and  relate 
to  them  what  God  had  done,and  was  ftill  doing  among  my  poor 
People. 

Wednefday,  Aug,  21.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in  Converfation 
with  Mr.  Dickinfon^  contriving  fomething  for  the  Settlement  of 
the  Indians  together  in  a  Body,  that  they  might  be  under  better 
Advantages  for  Inftrudtion.  In  the  Afternoon,  fpent  Time 
agreably  with  other  Friends  ;  wrote  to  my  Brother  at  College  : 
But  was  grieved  that  Time  Aid  away,  while  I  did  fo  little  for 
God, 

Y  2  Friday, 


i62      JB^fB.  The  LIFE 

Friday,  Aug.  23.  In  the  Morning,  was  very  weak  ;  but 
favoured  with  fome  Freedom  and  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer  :  Was 
compofed  and  comfortable  in  Mind.  After  Noon,  rode  to 
Crofweekfung  to  my  poor  People. 

Saturday,  Af. 24. ——Had Cocnpofure  SiPeace,  while  riding 
from  the  Indians  to  my  Lodgings  :  Was  enabled  to  pour  out  my 
Soul  to  God  for  dear  Friends  in  New- England.  Felt  a  fweet 
tender  Frame  of  Spirit  :  My  Soul  was  compofed  and  refrefhed 
in  God.  Had  likewife  Freedom  and  Earneftnefs  in  praying  for 
my  dear  People  :  BlefTed  be  God.  O  the  Peace  of  God  thai  paf- 
jeth  aUVnder Handing  !  'Tis  impoffible  todefcribe  thefweetPeacc 
bf  Confcience,  and  Tendernefs  of  Soul,  I  then  enjoyed.  O 
the  blefled  Foretaftes  of  Heaven  f 

Lord's- Day,  yf«^.25. 1  rode  to  my  Lodgings  in  theEvcn- 

ing,  blefJing  the  Lord  for  his  gracious  Vifttation  of  the  Indians^ 
and  the  Soul-refrefhing  Things  I  had  feen  theDay  paft  amongft 
them,  and  praying  thatGod  would  ftill  carry  on  his  divineWork 
among  them. 

Monday, ^tt^. 26. 1  went  from  the  Indians  to  my  Lodg- 
ings, rejoycing  for  the  Goodnefs  of  God  to  my  poor  People  $ 
and  enjoyed  Freedom  of  Soul  in  Prayer,  and  other  Duties,  in 
the  Evening.     Blefs  the  Lord,  O  my  Soul. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  a  Journey  towards  the  Forks 
oi Delaware, dcCigning  to  go  from  thence  ioSufquahannah, htioxQ 
he  returned  to  Crofweekjung,  It  was  five  Days  from  hisDepar- 
ture  from  Crofweekfung^hzioxc  he  reach'd  ih^Forks^gomg  round 
by  the  Way  of  Philadelphia,  and  waiting  on  the  Governour  of 
Penfylvania,  to  get  a  Recommendation  from  him  to  the  Chiefs 
of  the  Indians  ;  which  he  obtain'd.  He  fpeaks  of  much  Com- 
fort and  fpiritual  Refrefhmcnt  in  this  Journey  ;  and  alfo  a  Senfe 
of  his  exceeding  Unworthin^fs,  thinking  bimfelf  the  meaneft 
Creature  that  ever  lived.] 


Lord's- Day,  September  i.   [  At  theForks  oWelaware  ]- 


God  gave  me  the  Spirit  of  Prayer,  and  it  was  a  blefled  Seafon  in 
that  Refpecl.  My  Soul  cried  toGod  forMercy,in  an  afFe£tionatC 
Manner.     h\  the  Evening  alfo  my  Soul  rejoyced  in  God. 

[  His  private  Diarv  has  nothing  remarkable,  for  the  two  next 
pays,  but  what  is  in  his  ^MiQkJournaL  ] 

Wcdnefday, 


«>/ il4ir.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1745.     163 

Wednefday,  Sept,  4.  Rode  15  Miles  to  an  Iri/h  Settlement, 
and  preachM  there  from  Luke  xiv  22.—  Jnd  yet  there  is  Room. 
God  was  pleafed  to  afford  me  fome  Tender nefs  and  Enlarge- 
ment in  the  firft  Prayer,  and  much  Freedom, as  well  as  Warmth, 
in  Sermon.  There  were  many  Tears  in  the  AfTembly  :  The 
People  of  God  feemed  to  melt,  and  others  to  be  in  fome  Mea- 
fure  awaken'd.  BlefTed  be  the  Lord,  that  lets  me  fee  his  Work 
going  on  in  one  Place  and  another. 

[  The  Account  for  Thurfday  is  the  fame  for  Subftanceas  in 
his  publick  Journal.] 

Friday,  S^pt,  6.  Enjoyed  fome  l^reedom  and  Intenfenefs  of 
Mind  in  Prayer  alone  ;  and  longed  to  have  mySoul  more  warm'd 
with  divine  and  heavenly  Things.  Was  fomewhat  melancholy, 
towards  Night,  and  longed  to  die  and  quit  a  Scene  of  Sin  and 
Darknefs  j   but  was  a  little  fupported  in  Prayer. 

f  This  Melancholy  continued  the  next  Day.] 

JjOrd'S'DayySept.  8. In  theEvening,God  was  pleafed  to 

enlarge  me  in  Prayer,  and  give  me  Freedom  at  the  Throne  of 
Grace  :  I  cried  to  God  for  the  Enlargement  of  his  Kingdom  in 
the  World,  and  in  particular  among  wy  dear  People  ;  was  alfo 
enabled  to  pray  for  many  dear  Minifters  of  my  Acquaintance, 
both  in  thefe  Parti,  and  in  New- England  ;  and  a!fo  for  other 
dear  Friends  in  New- England.  And  my  Soul  was  fo  engaged 
and  enlarged  in  that  fweet  Exercife,  that  I  fpent  near  an  Hour 
in  it,  and  knew  not  how  to  leave  the  Mercy-Seat.  Oh,  how  I 
delighted  to  ppey  and  cry  to  God  ?  I  faw,  God  was  both  able 
and  willing  to  do  all  that  I  defired,  for  my  felf  and  Friends,  and 
his  Church  in  general.  I  was  likewife  much  enlarged  and  affift- 
cd  in  Family-Prayer.  And  afterwards,  when  I  was  juft  going 
to  Bed,  God  helped  me  to  renew  myPetitions  withArdency  and 
Freedom.  Oh, 'twas  to  me  a  bieflcdEveningof  Prayer  I  Blefs 
the  Lord,  O  my  Seul. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  from  the  Fof  ks  of  Delaware  to 
go  to  Sufquahannah.  And  on  the  fifth  Day  of  his  Journey^  he 
airived  at  Shaumoking^  a  large  Indian  Town  on  Sufquahannah' 
River.  He  performM  the  Journey  under  a  confiderable Degree 
of  Melancholy,  occafion'd  at  firfl  by  his  hearing  that  the  Mora- 
vians  were  gone  before  him  to  the  Su/quahannah-Indiam.] 
>  Saturdays 


1^4    JSf.  is:  7beLlFE 

Saturday,  Sept.  14.  [At  Shaumoking  ]  >  Jn  the  Evening, 
mySoul  was  enlarged  airofweetly  engaged  inPrayer  ;  efpecially, 
tbatGoD  would  fet  up  hisKingdom  in  thisPlace,  where  the  Devil 
now  reigns  in  the  moft  eminent  Manner.  And  I  was  enabled  to 
afk  this  for  God,  for  his  Glory,  and  bccaufe  I  longed  for  the 
Enlargement  of  his  Kingdom,  to  the  Honour  of  his  dear  Name. 
I  could  appeal  to  God  with  the  greateft  Freedom,  that  he  knew 
it  was  his  dear  Caufe,  and  not  my  own,  that  engaged  myHeart  : 
And  my  Soul  cried,  Lardy  fet  up  thy  Kingdom^  for  thine  ownG  lory. 
Glorify  thyfelf  •,  and  1 /hail  re  Joyce,  Get  Honour  to  thy  bb-ffed 
I^ame  :  Jnd  this  is  all  I  defire.  Do  with  me  juji  what  thou  wilt, 
Blejfed  be  thy  Name  forever^  that  thou  art  God^  and  that  thou  wilt 
glorify  thy  f elf .  O  that  the' whole  IVorld  might  glorify  thee,  O 
let  thefe  poor  People  be  brought  to  know  thet^  and  love  thee,  for  the 
Glory  of  thy  dear  ever-bkjfed  Name,  I  could  not  but  hope,  ^that 
God  would  bring  in  thefe  miferable,  wicked  Indians :  Tho' 
there  appeared  little  humanProbability  of  it  ;  for  they  were  then 
dancing  and  revelling,  as  if  pofTefTed  by  the  Devil.  But  yet  I 
hoped,  iho'  againjl  Hope,  that  God  would  be  glorified,  that  God's 
Name  would  be  glorified  b«.  thefe  poor  Indians,  I  continued 
long  in  Prayer  and  Praife  to  God  ;  and  had  great  Freedom,  En- 
largement and  Sweetnefs,  remembring  dearFriendsiniV^iu-^w^- 
hnd,  as  well  as  the  People  of  my  Charge.  Was  entirely  free 
from  that  Dejedion  of  Spirit,with  which  I  am  frequently  exer* 
cifed  :  Blefied  be  God. 

[  His  Diary  from  this  Time  toSept,  22.  ( the  laft  Day  of  his 
Continuance  among  the  Indiam  at  Sufquahannah)  is  not  legible  , 
by  Reafon  of  the  Badnefs  of  the  Ink.  It  was  probably  written 
with  the  Juice  of  fome  Berries  found  in  the  Woods,  having  no 
other  Ink  in  that  Wildernefs.  So  that  for  this  Space  of  Time 
the  Reader  muft  be  wholly  refer'd  to  his  publick  Journal, 

On  Monday,  Sept,  23.  He  left  the  Indians,  in  order  to  his 
Return  to  the  Forks  of  Delaware,  in  a  very  weak  State  of  Body, 
and  under  Deje<Stion  of  Mind,  which  continued  the  two  firfi 
Days  of  his  Journey.] 

Wednefday,  Sept.  25.  Rode  ftill  homeward.  In  the  Fore- 
noon,enjoy'd  Free^Dm  and  Intenfenefs  of  Mind  in  Meditation 
on  Jub  xhi.  5 ,6.  1  have  heard  of  Thee  by  the  hearing  of  the  Ear  ; 
but  now  mine  Eye  feeth  thee  :  fVherefore  1  abhor  my  fel/^  and  repent 
in  Dufi  ond  /{Jhes,  The  Lord  gave  rae  Clearnefs  to  penetrate 
into  the  fweet  Truths  contained  in  that  Text.  It  was  a  com" 
furtable^nd  fvvcet  beafon  to  me. 

Thurfday, 


ef  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D,  1 745.     1 65 

ThurfJay,  Sept,  26.  Was  filll  mucfi  diforder'd  in  Body,  and 
able  to  ride  but  flowly.  Continued  my  Journey  however. 
Near  Night,  arrived  at  the  Irijh  Settlement,  about  15  Miles 
from  mine  ovi^n  Houfe.  This  Day,  while  riding,  I  was  much 
exercifcd  with  a  Senfe  of  my  Barrennefs ;  and  verily  thought, 
there  was  no  Creature  that  had  any  true  Grace,  but  what  was 
more  fpiritual  and  fruitful  than  I ;  I  could  not  think  that  any 
of  God's  Children  made  fo  poor  a  Hand  of  living  to  God  as  I, 

Friday,  ^ept.  27.  Spent  confidcrableTime,  in  the  Morning, 
in  Prayer  and  Praife  to  God.  My  Mind  was  fomewhat  intenfe 
in  the  Duty,  and  my  Heart  in  fome  Degree  warm'd  with  aSenfe 
of  divine  Things  :  My  Soul  was  melted,  to  think,  that  God  had, 
accounted  me  faithful^  putting  me  into  the  Mihijiry^  notwithftand- 
ing  all  my  Barrennefs  and  Deadnefs.  My  Soul  was  alfo  in  fome 
Meafure  enlarged  in  Prayer  for  the  dear  People  of  my  Charge, 
as  well  as  for  other  dearFriends.  In  theAfternoonjVifited  foms 
Chriftian  Friends,  and  fpent  theTime,  I  think,  profitably  :  My 
Heart  was  warm'd,  and  more  engagec^  in  the  Things  of  God. 
In  the  Evening,  I  enjoyed  Enlargement,  Warmth,  andComfort 
in  Prayer  ;  My  Soul  relied  on  God  for  Affiftance  and  Grace  to 
enable  me  to  do  fomething  in  his  Caufe  :  My  Heart  was  drawn 
out  in  Thankfulnefs  to  God  for  what  he  had  done  for  his  own 
Glory  among  my  poorPeopIe  of  late  :  And  I  felt  encouraged  to 
proceed  in  his  Work,  being  perfwaded  of  his  Power,and  hoping 
his  Arm  might  be  further  revealed,  for  the  Enlargement  of  his 
dearKingdom  :  And  my  Soul  rejoycedin  hope  of  the  Glory  of  Gody 
in  Hope  of  the'Adva<ncement  of  his  declarative  Glory  in  the 
World,  as  well  as  of  enjoying  him  in  a  World  of  Glory.  Oh, 
bleiTed  be  God,  the  living  God,  forever  ! 

[  He  continued  in  this  comfortable,  fweet  Frame  of  Mind, 
the  two  next  Days.  On  theDay  following,  he  went  to  his  owri 
Houfe,  in  the  Forks  of  Delaware^  and  continued  ftill  in  the  fame 
Frame.  ThenextDay,  v;hich  was  Tuefday,  he  vifited  his  hir 
diam.- Wednefday  he  fpent  mollly  in  writing  the  Medita- 
tions he  had  had  in  his  latejourney  to  Sufquahannah*  On  Tbarf- 
day,  he  left  the  Forks  of  Deiaiuare,  and  travelled  towards  Crof- 
week/ung,  where  he  arrived  on  Saturday  [OSiob,  5.)  and  conti- 
nued from  Day  to  Day  in  a  comfortable  State  of  Mind.  There 
is  nothing  material  in  his  Diary  for  this  Dd^y  and  the  next,  but 
what  is  in  his  printed  JournaUl 

Monday, 


'i66      mui%.  ri^LIFE 

Monday,  05ioh,  7.  Being  called  by  the  Church  and  People 
of  Enfihampton  on  Long- IJland ^  as  a  Member  of  a  Council,  to 
aflifl  and  advife  in  Affairs  of  Difficulty  in  that  Church,  I  fet  out 
en  my  Journey  this  Morning,  before  it  was  well  Light,  and  tra- 
velled to  Elijabeih'Tcwn^  and  there  lodged.  Enjoyed  fomc 
Comfort  on  the  Road,  in  Converfation  with  Mr.  WiUiamT^en- 
nenty  who  was  fent  for  on  the  fame  Bufmefs. 

[  He  profecuted  hisjourney  with  theotherMiniflers  that  were 
fent  for;  and  did  not  return  till  O^o^.  24.  While  he  was  at 
£a/i' Hampton^  the  Importance  of  the  Bufmefs  that  the  Council 
were  come  upon, lay  with  fuch  Weight  on  his  Mind,  and  he  was 
fo  concerned  for  the  Intereft  of  Religion  in  that  Place,  that  he 
flept  but  little  for  feveral  Nights  fucceflively.  In  his  Way  to 
and  from  Ea/i-  Hampten,  he  had  feveral  Seafons  of  fweetRefrcfh- 
ment,  wherein  his  Soul  was  enlarged  and  comforted  with  divine 
Confolations,  in  fecret  Retirement ;  and  he  had  fpecial  AlTift- 
ance  in  publick  minifterial  Performances  in  the  Houle  of  God  ; 
and  yet,  at  the  fame  Time,  a  Senfe  of  extreme  Vilenefs  and  Un- 
prftfitablenefs.  He  from  Time  to  Time  fpeaks  of  Soul-refrefh- 
ment  and  Comfort  in  Converfation  with  the  Miniflers  that  tra- 
velled with  him  ;  and  feems  to  have  little  or  nothing  of  Melan- 
choly, 'till  he  came  to  tjic  Weft-End  of  Long-jpand^  in  his 
Return.  After  that, he  was  opprefled  withDejedlion  andGlocmi- 
refs  of  Mind,  for  feveral  Days  together.— For  an  Account  of 
the  four  firft  Days  after  his  return  from  his  Journey,  I  refer  the 
Reader  to  his  publick  "Journal, 

Monday, 0^<s^.28. Had  anEvening  of  fweelRefrefhing; 

my  Thoughts  were  raifed  to  a  blefled  Eternity  ;  my  Soul  was 
melied  with  Defires  of  per fcdt  Holinefs,  and  perfectly  glorifying 
God. 

Tuefday,  Osioh.  2C).  About  Noon,  rode  and  viewed  the 
Indian  Lsnds  at  Cranberry  :  Was  much  dejefted,  and  grea:ly 
perplexed  in  Mind  :  Knew  not  how  to  lee  any  Body  again,  my 
Soul  was  fo  funk  within  me.  Oh  that  thefe  Trials  might  make 
rne  more  humble  and  holy.  Oh  that  God  would  keep  me 
from  giving  Way  to  fmful  Deje£lion,  which  may  hinder  my 
Ufefulnefs. 

Wednefday,  O£iob.  30.  My  Soul  was  refrefhed  with  a 
View  of  the  Conticuance  of  God's  blefTed  Work  among  the 
Jndians, 

Thurfday,  Oaob.  31.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  Writing  : 
Enjoyed  not  much  fpiritualCcmfort  ;  but  was  not  fo  much  funk 
with  Melancholy  as  at  fomc  other  Times. 

Friday^ 


cf  Mr,  David  Bralnerd.       A.D.  1 745.     1 67 

Friday,  Nov.  i.  [See  the  publick  jfsumal  ] 
Saturday,  Nov,  2.  Spent  the  Day  with  thelndians,  and  wrote 
fome  Things  oMmportance;   and  long'd  to  do  more  for  God, 
than  I  did,  or  couid  do  in  this  prefent  feeble  and  imperfedStatc. 
[  Nov.   3.  &  4.  [  See  the  publick  Journal.  ] 
Tuefday,  Nov.  5.   He  left  the  Indians,  and  fpent  the  remain- 
ing Part  of  thisWeek  in  travelling  to  variousParts  oiNew-Jerfey^ 
in  order  to  get  a  ColleElion  for  the  Ufe  of  the  Indians^  and  to 
obtain  a  School- Ma/ier  toinftru6t  them.  And  in  the  meanTime, 
he  fpeaks  of  very  fweet  Refreftiment  and  Entertainment  with 
Chnftian  Friends,   and  of  his  being  fweetly  employed,  while 
riding, in  Meditation  on  divine  Subje6ls  ;  his  Heart's  being  en- 
larged, his  Mind  clear,  his  Spirit  refrefhed  with  divine  Truths, 
and  Jiis  Hearths  burning  zviihin  him, while  he  went  by  the  JVay^and 
the  Lord  opened  to  him  the  Scriptures.  ] 

Lord's- Day,  Nov.  10.  [  At  Elizabeih-Town.  ]  Was  com- 
fortable in  the  Morning,  both  in  Body  and  Mind  ;  preach*d  in 
the  Forenoon  from  2  Cor.  v.  20.  God  was  pleafed  to  give  mc 
Freedom  and  Fervency  in  my  Difcourfc ;  and  the  Prefence  of 
God  feem'd  to  be  in  theAfTembly  :  Numbers  were  affe(5ted,and 
there  were  manyTears  among  them.  In  the  Afternoon, preach'd 
from  LuL  xiv.  22.  Jnd  yet  there  ii  Room,  Was  favoured  wiiii 
divine  Afliftance  in  the  firft  Prayer,  and  poured  out  my  Soul  to 
-God  with  a  filial  Temper  of  JNiind  ;  the  living  God  alio  ailifted 
me  in  Sermon. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  went  to  New-Town  on  Long-IJland,  i^ 
a  Meeting  of  the  Pr//^>/^ry.  He  fpeaks  of  fome  fweet  Med' ~ 
tations  he  had  while  there,  on  ChrijVs  delivering  up  the  Kin^a:rn 
to  the  Father^  and  of  hisSoul's  being  much  refrefli'd  and  warm'J 
with  the  Conlideration  of  that  bliisful  Day.  ] 

Friday,  Nov.  15.  Could  not  crofs  the  Ferry  by  Rcafon  of  thf: 
Violence  of  the  Wind  ;  nor  could  I  enjoy  any  Place  of  Retire- 
ment at  the  Ferry-Houfe  :  So  that  I  was  in  Perplexity.  Yet 
God  gave  me  fome  Satisfaction  and  Sweetnefe  inMeditation,and 
lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God  in  the  midft  of  Company.  And 
altho'  lome  were  drinking  and  talking  profanely ,  which  was  ir - 
deed  a  Grief  to  me,  yet  my  Mind  was  calm  and  compofsJ- 
And  I  could  not  but  blefs  God,  that. I  was  not  like  to  fjjend  an 
Eternity  in  fuchCompany.  In  thcEvening,  Ifatdown  and  wrore 
with  Compofure  and  Freedom;  and  can  fay  ( through  pure 
Grace  )  it  was  a  comfortable  Erening;  to  my  Scui,  an  Evening 
I  was  enabled  to  fpend  in  the  Service  of  God. 

Z  Saturday, 


i68     y^/.28.  ne   LIFE 

Saturday,  iVtf^%  i6.  CrofsM  theFerry  about  tcrt  o'CIock  ;  ar- 
rived at  Elizabeth-Town  near  Night.  Was  in  a  calm  compofed 
Frame  of  Mind,  and  felt  an  entire  Refignation  with  Refpe^t  to 
a  Lofs  I  had  lately  fuflain'd,  in  having  my  Hoife  flollen  from  mc 
the  !aft  Wednefda>Njght,at  New-Towr}.  Had  fomeLongings-of 
Sou!  for  the  dear  People  of  Elizabeth-Town^  that  God  would 
pour  out  his  Spirit  upon  them, and  revive  hislVork  amongft  them. 

[  He  fpent  the  four  next  Days  at  Elizabetb-Town  ;  for  the 
moft  Part,  in  a  Free  and  Comfortable  State  of  Mind,  intcnfcly 
engaged  in  the  Service  of  God,  and  enjoying,  at  fome  Times, 
the  fpecial  AlTiftances  of  his  Spirit.  OnThurfday,thisWeek,he 
rode  tofreehoUy^nd  fpent  theDay  under  confiderableDejedlion.] 

Friday,  A^^i/.  2  2.  Rode  to  Mr.  Tennem's^  and  from  thence  to 
Crofweekfung,  Had  little  Freedom  in  Meditation,  while  riding; 
V^hich  wasaGriefand  Burden  to  my  Soul.  Oh  that  I  could  fill 
up  all  my  Time,  whether  in  the  Houfe  or  by  the  Way,  forGod! 
I  was  enabled,  I  think,  this  Day  to  give  up  my  Soul  to  God, 
and  put  overall  my  Concerns  into  his  Hands  ;  and  found  fome 
real  Confolation  in  the  T'lought  of  being  entirely  at  the  divine 
Difpofal,  and  having  no  Will  or  Intereftof  my  own.  I  have  re- 
ceived my  all  from  God  ;  Oh  that  I  could  return  my  all  to 
God.  Surely  God  is  worthy  of  my  higheftAfFedlion,  and  moft 
devout  Adoration  :  He  is  infinitely  worthy,  that  I  fhould  make 
him  my  laft  End,  and  live  forever  to  him  :  Oh  that  I  might 
never  more,   in  any  one  Inf!ance,Iive  to  my  felf. 

Saturdav,  iVw.  2^3.  Vifited  my  People ;  fpent  the  Day  with 
them  :  Wrote  fome  Things  of  Importance.  But  was  pretty 
much  dejected,  moft  of  the  Day. 

[  There  is  nothing  very  material  in  h\sDiary  for  the  four  next 
Days  bat  what  is  alfo  in  his  publick  yournal.  ] 

Thurfday,  Nov,  28 I  enjoyed  fome  divine  Comfort, 

and  Fervency  in  the  publick  Exercife,  and  afterwards.  And 
While  ridJKg  to  my  Lodgings,  was  favoured  with  fome  fweet 
Meditations  on  Luk.  ix.  31.  Who  appeared  in  Glory^  and  /pake 
of  his  Deceaje^  which  he  /hould  accompAJ}}  at  Jerufalem.  My 
Tho'ts  ran  with  Freedom,  and  I  faw  and  felt  what  a  glorious 
Subj'dl  the  D^^/;^  of  Chr  is  r  is  for  ^/.r/yzW Souls  to  dwell  upon 
in  their  Converfaticn.  Oh,  the  Death  of  Christ  !  How  in- 
finitely/)r^f/^ttj  / 

[   For  the  three  next  Days,  fee  the  publick  Journa\.\^ 
Moniay,  Deccmb,  2.    Was  much   afFedted  with  Grief,  vhat  I 
had  not  lived  more  to  God  ;  and  ft  I'  ftrong  Refviut?        •        u- 
bl.;my  Diligence  in  m)  Maftcr's^c/vicc. 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A,D.  1745.      169 

[  After  this,  he  went  to  a  Meeting  of  the  Frefhytery^  at  a 
Place  mNewJ er J ey  ^C'hWqo  Connect  tcut-  Far  mi  ;  which  occafion'd 
hisAbfence  from  his  People  the  reft  of  this  Week.  He  fpcaks 
of  fomeSea'bnsof  Sweetnefs,  Soiemniiy  and  fpiritual  AfFe<5lion 
in  his  Abfence. 

Lord*s-Day,  Decemb,  8.     See  his  publick  Journal,'^ 

MoHi^ay,  Decern.  9.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  procuring 
Provifions,  in  Order  to  my  fetting  up  Houfe- keeping  among 
the  Mians*  Enjoyed  little  Satisfaction  thio*  the  Day,  beirg 
veryfmuch  out  of  my  Element. 

Tuefday,  Decemh.  10.  Was  engaged  in  the  fame  Bufincfs 
as  Yefterday.     Towards  Night,  got  into  my  own  Houfe.* 

VVednefday,  X)^^^;;?.  II.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in  neceffary 
Labour  about  my  Houfe.  In  the  Afternoon,  rode  cut  upon 
Bufinefs,  and  fpent  the  Evening  with  fome  Satisfadiion  among 
Friends  in  Converfation  on  a  feiioas  and  profitable  Subjedl. 

f  Thurfday,  Decern.  12.     See  his  publick  Journal.'^ 

Friday,  Decern,  13.  Spent  the  Day  mainly  in  Labour  about 
my  Houfe.  In  the  Evening,  fpent  fome  Time  in  writing  ; 
but  was  very  weary,  and  much  out-done  with  the  Labour  of 
the  Day. 

Saturday,  Decern.  14.  Rofe  early,and  wrote  by  Candle- Light 
fome  confiderable  Time  ;  fpent  moft  of  the  Day  in  writing  : 
But  was  fomewhat  dejeded.  in  the  Evening,  was  exercifed 
wiih  a  Pain  in  my  Head. 

[  For  the  twonextDays5fee  his  ^MhWckJournal  The  remain- 
der of  thisVVeek  he  fpent  chiefly  in  writing  :  Some  part  of  the 
Time  under  aDegree  of  Melancholy  i  but  fome  Part  of  it  with 
a  fweet  Ardency  in  Religion.] 

Saturday,  Decern.  21.  '  ■■  After  my  Labours  with  the  /«* 
dlans^  I  fpent  fome  Time  in .  writing  fome  Things  divine  and 
folemn  i  and  was  much  wearied  with  the  Labours  of  the  Day  ; 


This  is  the  third  Houfe  that  he  built  to  dwell  in  by  hlm- 
felf  among  the /«(Sf>*(J«;  ;  The  iirft  at  Kaunaumeek  in  the 
County  of  Albany  ;  the  fecond  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware 
in  Penfylvania  :  And  now  this  at   Crofwtikfung  in  iV«w/- 

Z  2  found 


1 70    Ml  28.  t;6^  L I F  E  i 745. 

found  that  mySpirits  were  extretnelvfpent,  and  that  I  could  do 
no  more.  I  am  confcious  to  my  felf  that  my  Labours  are  as 
great  and  conftant  as  my  Nature  will  bear,  and  that  ordina- 
rily I  go  to  theExtent  of  my  Strength  i  So  that  I  do  all  I  can  : 
But  the  Mifery  is,  1  don't  labour  with  that  heavenly  Temper, 
that  fmgle  Eye  to  the  Glory  of  God,^  that  [  long  for. 
[  Lord's-Day,  Decern,  42.     See  the  publicky^arw^^/.] 

Monday,  and  Taefday,  Decern,  23  &  24.  Spent  thefe  Days 
in  Writing,  with  the  urm)ft  Diligence.  Felt  in  the  main  a 
fweet  Mortification  to  the  World,  and  a  Defire  to  live  and  la- 
bour (.nlv  for  God  ;  but  wanted  more  Warmth  andSpirituality, 
a  more  fenfib'e  and  afFe^ionate  Regard  to  the  Glory  of  God. 
[   Wednefday,  Dec.  2^.  See  the  publick  y^^wrwa/.  ] 

Thurfday,  and  Friday,  Decern.  26^  h  IJ  Laboured  in  my 
Studies,  to  the  utmoft  of  myStreagth  :  And  tho'  I  felt  a  fteady 
Dirpofition  of  Mmd  to  live  to  God,  and  that  I  had  nothing  in 
this VV  .rid  to  live  for  ;  yet  I  did  not  find  that  fenfibleAfFeftion 
in  the  Service  of  God,  that  I  wanted  to  have  ;  myHeart  feem'd 
barren,  ibo*  my  ^ead  and  Hands  were  full  of  Labour, 
[  For  the  four  next  Days,  fee  his  publick  Journal.^] 

"VVeJnefday,  January  i    1745,^6. 1  am  thisDay  begln- 

Tiing  a  New  Tear  ;  and  God  has  carried  me  thro'  numerous 
Trials  and  Labours  in  th®  pafl.  He  has  amazingly  fupporced 
my  feeble  Frame  ;  for  having  obtained  Help  of  God,  1  continue 
to  this  Day  O  that  (  migiit  live  nearer  to  God,  this  Year,than 
I  did  the  bft.  The  Bufinefs  I  have  been  called  to,  and  enabled 
to  go  through,  I  know,  has  been  as  great  as  Nature  could  bear 
up  under,  and  what  would  have  funk  and  overcome  me  quite, 
without  fpecial  Supoort.  But  Alas,  Alas  I  Tho' 1  have  done 
the  Labours,  and  endured  the  Trials,  with  what  Spirit  have  I 
done  the  one,  and  barn  the  other  ?  How  cold  has  been  the 
Frame  of  my  Heart  oftentimes  I  And  how  little  have  I  fenlibly 
eyed  the  Glory  of  God,  in  all  my  Doings  andSufferings  !  I  have 
found,  that  I  could  have  no  P;.-ace  without  filling  up  all  my 
"?'inne  with  Labours  ;  and  thus  NecejlJity  has  been  laid  upon  me  ; 
vea,  i:i  that  Refpedl,  I  have  loved  to  labour :  But  theNdi/isry  is, 
t  coaU  noi  fenfihly  labour  for  God^Ti^  \  would  have  done.  May 
■  for  the  future  be  enabled  more  fenlibly  to  makti  the  Glory  of 


*  On  the  fiiol  of  thefeDays  he  wrote  the  6ih£^//<r  herep«t>- 

;;ih\i  a:  'h^'  Kfi;i 


hi"- 


^/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1746.     171 

[  For  the  Space  from  this  Time  'till  the  next  Monday,  fee 
the  publick  Journal.'] 

Monday,  Jan.  6  Being  very  weak  in  Body,  I  rode  for  my 
Health.  While  riding,  my  Thoughts  were  fweetly  engaged, 
for  a  Time,  upon  the  Stone  cut  out  of  the  Mountain  without  Handiy 
which  brake  in  Piecef  ?M  before  it,  znd  wax^d great,  and  became 
a  great  Mountain^  and  filled  the  whole  Earth  :  And  1  longed  that 
Jesus  fhould  take  to  him/elf  his  great  Power,  and  reign  to  the 
Ends  of  the  Earth,  And  Oh,  how  fweet  were  the  Moments, 
wherein  I  felt  my  Soul  warm  with  Hopes  of  the  Enlargement 
of  the  Redeemer's  Kingdom  !  I  wanted  nothing  elfe  but  that 
Christ  ftiould  reign^  to  the  Glory  of  his  blefled  Name. 

[  The  next  D2iy  he  complains  of  want  of  Fervency.  ] 

Wednefday,  Jan,  8.  In  the  Evening,  mv  Heart  was  drawn 
out  afterGod  in  fecret :  My  Soul  was  refrefh'd  and  quicken'd  ; 
and  I  truft,  Faith  was  in  Exercife.  I  had  great  Hopes  of  the 
Ingathering  of  precious  Souls  to  Chrift  5  not  only  among  my 
own  People,  but  others  alfo.  I  was  fweetly  refigned  and  com- 
pofcd  under  my  bodily  Weaknefs  ;  and  was  willing  to  live  or 
die,  and  defirous  to  labour  for  God  to  the  utmoft  of  my 
Strength. 

Thurfday,  Jan.  9.  Was  ftill  very  weak,and  much  exercifed 
with  vapoury  Diforders.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  fome  En- 
largement and  Spirituality  in  Prayer.  Oh  that  I  could  always 
fpend  my  Time  profitably,  both  in  Health  and  Weaknefs. 

Friday,  Jan.  10,  My  Soul  was  in  a  fweet,  calm,  compofed 
Frame,  and  my  Heart  fill'd  with  Love  to  all  the  World  ;  and 
Chriftian  Simplicity  and  Tendernefs  feemed  then  to  prevail  and 
reign  within  me.  NcarNight^vifited  a  feriousBaptift-  Minifter, 
and  had  fome  agreable  Converfation  with  him ;  and  found  that 
I  could  tafte  God  in  Friends. 

[  For  the  four  next  D^yiy  fee  the  publick  journal,] 

Wednefday,  Jan.  15.  MySpirits  were  very  low  and  flat, and 
I  could  not  but  think  I  was  aBurden  toGod*sEarth  ;  and  could 
fcarcely  look  any  Body  in  the  Face,  thro*  Shame  and  Senfe  of 
Barrennefs.     God  pity  a  poor  unprofitable  Creature. 

[  The  two  next  Days,  he  bad  fome  Comfort  and  Rs^frefii' 
^iCii;.     For  the  two  following  D^ys,  fse  the  publick  JournaL 

3^hc 


172  Ml  28.  ^^i?  LIFE 

The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  a  Journey  to  EUfabeth-Tcwn^ 
to  confer  with  the  Correfpondenti  at  their  Meeting  there  -,  and 
enjoyadmuch  fpiritual  Refrefhment  from  Day  to  Day, through 
this  Week.  The  Things  exprcfled  in  this  Space  of  Time,  are 
fuch  as  tbefe  ;  Serenity,  Compofure,  Sweetnefs^and  Tendernefs 
of  Soul,  Thankfgiving  toGod  for  his  Succefs  among  the  Indians^ 
Delight  in  Prayer  and  Praile,  fweet  and  profitable  Meditations 
on  various  divine  Subjeds,  Longing  for  more  Love,  for  more 
Vigour  to  live  to  God,  for  a  Life  more  intirely  devoted  toGod^ 
that  be  might  fpend  all  his  Time  profitably  for  God,  and  la  his 
Caufe  ;  converfing  on  fpiritual  Subjects  with  AfFedion  5  and 
Lamentation  for  unprofitablenefs. 

Lord's- Day,  ^an.  26  [At  ConneSficuh  Farms,  ]  Was  calm 
and  compofed.  Was  made  fenfible  of  my  utter  Inability  to 
preach,  without  divine  Help;  and  was  in  fome  good  Meafure 
willing  to  leave  it  with  God,  to  give  or  with-hold  Afliflance,  as 
he  faw  would  be  moft  for  his  own  Glory.  Was  favoured  with 
a  confidcrable  Degree  of  Affiitance  in  my  publick  Work.  After 
publick  Worihip,  I  was  in  a  fweet  and  folemn  Frame  of  Mind, 
thankful  to  God  that  he  had  made  me  in  fome  Meafure  faithful 
in  addrelling  precious  Sauls,but  grieved  that  I  had  been  no  more 
fervent  in  my  Work  j  and  was  tende:ly  a{Fe6i:ed  towards  all 
the  World,  longing  that  every  Sinner  might  be  faved  ;  and 
could  not  have  entertained  any  Bitternefs  towards  the  worft 
Enemy  living.  In  the  Evening, rode  to  EUfabeth-Town  :  while 
aiding,  wasalmoft  conftantly  engaged  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  to 
God,  left  I  (hould  lofe  that  fweet  heavenly  Solemnity  and  Com- 
pofure of  Soul  I  then  enjoyed.  Afterwards,  was  pleafed,  to 
think,  that  God  reigneth  ;  and  thought,  I  could  never  be  un- 
eafy  with  any  of  his  Difpenfations  ;  but  muft  be  entirely  Satis- 
fied, what  ever  Trials  he  fliould  caufe  me  or  his  Church  to  en- 
counter. Never  felt  more  Sedatenefs,  divine  Serenity  andCom- 
pofure  of  Mind  :  Could  freely  have  left  the  deareft  earthly 
Fn'end,  for  the  Society  of  Jngeh  and  Spirits  of  jujl  Men  made 
prj\a  :  Mv  Affedions  foar*d  aloft  to  the  blelled  Author  of 
every  dear  Enjoyment  :  I  view*d  the  Emptinefi  andUnfatisfac- 
tory  Nature  of  the  moft  defirable  earthly  Objeds,  any  further 
than  God  isfeen  in  them  :  and  longed  for  aLife  of  Spirituality 
and  inward  Purity  ;  without  which,  I  faw,  there  could  be  no 
true  Plcafure. 

[  He  retained  a  greatDegree  of  thisexcellentFrame  ofMInd, 
the  four  next  Days.  As  to  his  publick  Services  for  and  among 
the /ndiansy  and  hisSucccfs  in  thisTime,fce  the  publicky^ar«i?/J 

bitufday. 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1 74^;     1 73 

Saturday,  Feh  i.  Towards  Night,  enjoyed  fome  of  the  clear- 
eft  Thoughts  on  a  divine  Subje<a  ( 7;/z.  that  treated  of  1  Car. 
KV,  13,-16.)  that  ever  I  remember  to  have  had  upon  any  Sub- 
ject wharfoever ;  and  fpsnt  two  or  threeHoursin  writing  them. 
I  was  refreHi'd  with  this  Intenfenefs  :  My  Mind  wasfo  engaged 
in  thtie  vieditations,  f  could  fcarcely  turn  it  to  anv  Thing  elfe  ; 
and  indeed  I  could  not  be  willing  to  part  with  (o  fvveet  an  En^^ 
lertainment.  — — - 

Lord's-Day ,  i^f^.  2 After  publickW"orfhlp,my  bodily 

Strength  being  much  fpent,  my  Spirits  funk  amazingly  ;  and  ef- 
pecially  on  hearing  that  I  was  fo  generally   taken  to  be  a  Roman 
Cathdick,  fent  by  the  Papi/^s  to  draw  the  Indians  into  an  Infur- 
re6tion  againft  the  Englifh^  that  fome  were  in  Fear  of  me,  and 
others  were  for  having  me  taken  up  by  Authority  and  punifh'd. 
Alas,  what  will  not  the  Devil  do  to  bring  a  Slur  and  Difgrace 
on  the  Work  of  God  !  Oh,  how  holy  and  circumfpedt  had  I 
need  to  be  !  Thro*  divine  Goodnefs,  I  have  been  enabled  to 
mind  my  own  Buftnefs,  in  thefe  Parts,  as  well  as  elfe  where  ;  and 
to  let  all  Men  and  all  Denominations  of  Men  alone,   as  to  their  . 
Party-  Notions  ;  and  only  preach'd  the  plain  and  necelTary Truths 
ofChri/iianityy  neither  inviting  to  nor  excluding  from  my  meeting 
Any,  or  any  Sort  or  Perfwafion  whatfoever.     Towards  Night, 
the  Lord  gave  me  Freedom  at  the  Throne  of  Grace,  in  my  firlt 
Prayer   before  my  Catechetical  Ledlure :  And  in  opening  tha 
xlvi.  Pfalin  to  my  People,  my  Soul  confided  in  God,  altho*  the 
wicked  World  fhould  llander  and  perfecute  me,  or  even  con- 
demn and  execute  me  as  a  Traitor  to  my  King  and  Country. 
Truly  GoD  is  a  prefent  Help  in  Time  of  Trouble,  h^  theE  vening* 
my  Soul  was  in  fome  Meafure  comrorted,  having   fome  Hope 
that  one  poor  Soul  was  brought  Home  to  God  this  Day  ;   tho' 
the  Cafe  did  by  no  Means  appear  clear.     Oh   that  I  could    fill 
up  every  Moment  of  Time,  during  my  Abode  here  below,  ia 
the  Service  of  my  God  and  King.  • 

Moiictay,  Feb.  3.  My  Spirits  were  ftill  much  funk  with  what 
I  heard  -f^he  D^  OQtov^,  of  my  being  furpe61:ed  to  be  engaged  in 
the  Pretender^ s  In tereft  :  It  griev'd  me,  that  after  there  had  been 
fo  much  Evidence  of  a  glorious  Work  of  Grace  among  thcfepoor 
Indians^  as  that  the  moft  carnal  Men  could  not  but  t?.ke  Notice 
oF  the  grez.tChan^e  made  among  them,  (o  many  poorSoulsfhould 
f^'!l  fa fpe£t  the  whole  to  be  only  a  P<?/7/^  Plot,  and  fo  caft  .^ri 
avvfal  Reproach  on  this  blefTed  Work  of  the  divine  SpiRI  i'  > 
and  at  the  fame  Tims  wholly  exclude  themfelves  from  recsivin-^ 
^:\'^  3eneficby  this  divine  Influence.     This  put  me  upon  f^arch- 


174    ^/.  ^S.  The  LIFE 

ing  whether  I  bad  ever  drop'd  any  Thing  inadvertently,  that 
inight  give  Occafion  toany  to  fufpecSl  that  I  was  ftirring  up  the 
Mians  sgs'ii^a  the  Englijh  :  And  could  think  of  Nothing,  un- 
lefs  it  was  my  attempting  fometimes  to  vindicate  the  Rights  of 
the  7n<^/^;7j,  and  complaining  of  the  horrid  Pradlice  of  making 
the  Indians  drunk,  and  then  cheating  them  out  of  their  Lands  and 
otherProperties  :  And  once,  I  remembred,  I  had  done  this  with 
too  much  Warmth  of  Spirit.  And  this  much  diftrefs'd  me  5 
thinking  that  this  might  polTibly  prejudice  them  againf?^  this 
Work  of  Grace,  to  their  everlafting  Deftrudlion.  God,  I  be- 
lieve, did  me  good  by  this  Trial  ;  which  ferved  to  humble  me, 
and  {hew  me  the  NecelTity  of  Watchfulnefs,  and  of  being  wife 
as  a  Serperjt^  ?.s  well  as  harmhfs  as  a  Dove.  This  Exercife  Wd. 
me  often  to  the  Throne  of  Grace  ;  and  there  I  found  fome  Sup- 
port :  I'ho*  1  could  not  get  the  Burden  wholly  removed.  Was 
affiftcd  in  Prayer,  efpecially  in  the  Evening. 

[  fie  remained  ftill  under  aDegree  of  Exercife  of  Mind  about 
this  Affair  ;  which  continued  to  have  the  fame  EfFedl  upon  him, 
to  caufe  him  to  refledt  upon,  and  humble  himfelf,  and  frequent 
the  J  hrcne  of  Grace  :  But  foon  found  himfelf  much  more  re- 
lieved and  fupported.  He  was,  this  Week,  in  an  extremely 
weak  State,  and  obliged  (aske  exprefTes  it )  to  confume  confidern" 
ble  Timt  in  Diver fton,  for  his  Health. 

For  baturday,  Feb.  7.  And  the  Sabbath  following,  fee  his 
publick  Journal. 

Tie  i\londay  after,  he  fet  out  on  a  Tourney  to  the  Forks  of 
Delaixjcre^  to  vifit  the  Indians  there.  He  performed  the  Jour- 
rey  ur.der  grejit  Wcaknefs,  and  fometimes  was  exercifed  with 
mLch  Pjin  j  but  fays  nothing  of  Dejf(^ion  and  Melancholy. 
He  arrived  at  his  own  Houfe  at  the  Forks ^  en  Friday.  The 
Thirgs  appertaining  to  his  inward  Frames  and  Exercifes,  cx- 
prefb'd  witl.iii  thisVVeck,  are  fweetCompofure  ofMind,Thank- 
fulrcfs  ro  God  f<'r  his  Mercies  to  him  and  others,  Refignation 
10  the  divine  Will,  Comfort  inPrayer  and  religious  Converfation, 
his  Heart  drawn  out  after  God,  aid  affedtcd  with  a  Senfe 
of  h:3  own  Barrcnnefs,  as  well  as  the  Fulnefs  and  Freenefs  of 
tilvjrc  Grace.  ] 

Lcrc]'f.-Day,  Pch.  16 In  the  Evening,   was  in  a  fwcet 

crfrpofcd  Fri^me  of  Mind.  It  was  exceeding  refielhing  and 
ccm  fortes  be,  to  think,  thatGod  had  been  with  mc,  afFcrdingme 
icnie  gotd  Meafu.c  Qt  Afliftincc.    I  then  found  Freedom  and 

Sweetnef» 


r/M*.  David  Brainerd;    A.D.1746,    '175 

Swcctnefs  in  Prayer  and  Thankfgiving  to  God  ;  and  found  my 
Soul  fweetly  engaged  and  enlarged  in  Prayer  for  dear  Friends 
and  Acquaintance.  BlefTed  be  the  Name  of  the  Lord,  that  ever 
f  am  enabled  to  do  anyThing  for  his  dear  Intereft  and  Kingdom. 
BlefTed  be  God  who  enables  me  to  be  faithful.  Enjoyed  more 
Refolution  and  Courage  for  God,  and  more  Refreftiment  of 
Spirit,  than  I  have  been  favoured  with  for  many  Weeks  paft. 

Monday,  Feb,  17.  I  was  rcfrefhed  and  encouraged  : 

Found  a  Spirit  of  Prayer,  in  the  Evening,  and  earneft  Longings 
for  the  Illumination  and  Converfion  of  thefe  poor  Indians^ 

[  Tuefday  Feb.  18.     See  the  publick  Journal^ 

Wednefday,/V^.  19.—  My  Heart  was  comforted  and  re- 
frefh'd,  and  my  Soul  fill'd  with  Longings  for  the^  Converfion  of 
the  Indians  here. 

Thurfday,  Feb.  20.  "  God  was  pleafed  to  fupport  and 

refrcfti  my  Spirits,  by  affording  me  AiTiftance,  this  Day,  and 
fo  hopeful  aProfpedl  of  Succefs  ;  and  I  returned  home  rejoycing, 
and  bleUing  the  Name  of  the  Lord  ;  and  found  Freedom  and 
Sweetnefs  afterwards  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  had  my  Soul  drawn 
out  for  dearFriends.  Oh,  how  bleffed  a  Thing  is  it,to  labour  for 
God  faithfully,  and  with  Encouragement  of  Succefs  !  BleiTed 
be  the  Lord  forever  and  ever,  for  the  Affiftance  and  Comfort 
granted  this  Day. 

Friday,  Feb,  21.— "My  Soul  was  refrefn'd  and  comforted^ 
and  I  could  not  but  blefsGod,who  had  enabled  me  in  fome  good 
Meafure  to  be  faithful  in  the  Day  paft.  Oh,  how  fweet  it  is 
to  be  fpcnt  and  worn  out  for  God  I 

Saturday,  Feb.  22. My  Spirits  were  much  fupported* 

tho'  my  bodily  Strength  was  much  wafted.  Oh  that  God 
would  be  gracious  to  the  Souls  of  thefe  poor  Indians. 

God  has  been  verygraciousto  me  thisWeek  :  He  has  enabled  me 
to  preach  every  Day  ;  and  has  given  me  fome  Affiftance,  and 
encouragingProfpe6l  of  Succefs, in  almoft  every  Sermon.  BlefTed 
he  his  Name.  Divers  of  the  white  People  have  been  awaken'd 
this  Week,  and  fundry  of  the  Indians  much  cured  of  their  Pre- 
judices and  Jealoufies  they  had  conceived  againft  Chriftianity, 
and  fome  feem  to  be  really  awaken'd. 

[  Lord's- Day,  Feb,  23.     Sec  the  publick  Journal 
The  next  Day,  he   left    the  Forks  of  Delaware^  to  return  fo 
Grojweekfun^  5  and  fpent  the  whole  Week  'till  Saturday,  before 

A  a  'he 


-176      ^'/.  28:  2^^  LIFE 

he  arrived  there  ;  but  preachM  by  the  Way  every  Day,  except- 
ing one  ;  and  was  feveralTimes  greatly  aflifted  ;  and  had  much 
inward  Comfort,  and  earneft  Longings  to  fill  up  all  his  Time 
with  the  Service  of  God.  He  utters  fuch  Expreflions  as  thefe, 
after  Preaching  :  Oh  that  J  may  be  enabled  to  plead  the  Caufe  of 
God  faithfully^  to  my  dying  Moment.  Oh  how  fweet  it  would  be 
to  Jpend  my  f elf  wholly  for  God,  and  in  his  Caufe^  and  to  be  freed 
fromjelfijh  Motives  in  my  Labours  I 

For  Saturday  and  Lord's-Day,  March  i  &  2.  See  the  pub- 
Irck  Journal  The  four  next  Days  were  fpent  in  great  bodily 
Weaknefs ;  but  he  fpeaks  of  fomeSeafons  of  confiderable  inward 
Comfort.] 

Thurfday,  Ji^arch  6.  /  I  walked  alone  in  the  Evening,  and 
enjoyed  Sweetnefs  and  Comfort  in  Prayer,  beyond  what  I  have 
of  late  enjoyed  :  My  Soul  rejoyced  in  my  Pilgrimage-State^  and 
I  was  delighted  with  the  Thoughts  of  labouring  and  enduring 
Hardnefs  for  God  :  Felt  fome  longing  Defires  to  preach  the 
Gofpel  to  dear  immortal  Souls ;  and  confided  in  God,  that  he 
would  be  with  me  in  my  Work,  and  that  he  never  would  leave  nor 
for  fake  me^  to  the  End  of  my  Race.  Oh,  may  I  obtain  Mercy  of 
Cod  to  be  faithful^  to  my  dying  Moment. 

Friday,  March  7.  In  the  Afternoon,  went  on  in  my  Work 
with  Freedom  and  Chearfulnefs,  God  afTifting  me  ;  and  enjoyed 
Comfort  in  the  Evening. 

[  For  the  two  next  Days,  fee  the  publick  Journal'^ 

Monday,  March  10.  •  ■  My  Soul  was  refrefh'd  withFree- 
dcm  and  Enlargement, and  ( I  hope  )  the  livelyExercife  of  Faith, 
in  fecret  Prayer,  this  Night :  My  Will  was  fweetly  refigned  to 
(he  divine  Will,  and  my  Hopes  refpeiting  the  Enlargement  of 
the  dear  Kingdom  of  Chritt  fomcwhat  raifed,  and  could  commit 
jLioh's  Caufe  to  God  as  his  own. 

f  On  Tuefday,  he  fpeaks  of  fome  Sweetnefs  and  Spiritualify 
in  Chriftian  Converfation,  On  Wednefday,  complains  that  he 
enjoyed  not  much  Comfort  and  Satisfaction,  thro*  the  Day, 
btcaufche  did  but  little  for  God.  On  Thurfday,  fpent  confi- 
derable Time  in  Company,  on  a  fpccial  Occafion  ;  but  in  Per- 
plexity, becaufe  without  favoury  religious  Converfation.  For 
Friday,  Saturday  and  Lord*s-Day,  fee  the  publick  Journal, 

In  the  fcrmer  Part  of  the  Week  following  he  was  very^ill  ; 
and  alfo  under    great  Dcjc^^ionj  being,  as  he  apprehended, 

itndei'd 


«/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D    174^.     177 

rendered  unferviceable  by  his  Illnefs,  and  fearing  that  he  fhculd 
never  be  Serviceable  any  more  ;  and  therefore  exceedingly  long- 
ed for  Death.  But  afterwards  was  more  encouraged,  and  Life 
appeared  more  defirable  ;  becaufe  (  as  he  fays)  he  had  a  Utile 
D2wn  of  Hope,  that  he  might  be  ufeful  in  the  Wurld,  In  the  latter 
Part  of  the  Week,  he  was  in  fome  Meafure  relieved  of  his  Ill- 
nefs, in  the  Ufe  of  Means  prefcribed  by  a  Phyfician. 

For  Saturday,  and  Lord's- Day,  March  22 y  and  23.  See  his 
publick  journal,'] 

Monday,   March  24. After  the  Indians  were  gone  td 

their  VVorkjto  clear  their  Lands,  I  got  alone  and  poured  out  my 
Soul  to  God,  that  he  would  fmile  upon  thefe  feeble  Beginnings, 
and  that  he  would  fettle  an  Indian  Tov/n,  that  might  be  aMoun- 
tain  of  Holinefs 'y  and  found  my  Soul  much  refrefhed  in  thef« 
Petitions,  and  much  enlarged  for  Zion's  Intereft,  and  for  Num- 
bers of  dear  Friends  in  particular.  My  finking  Spirits  were  re- 
vived and  raifed,  and  I  felt  animated  in  the  Service  God  has 
called  me  to.  This  was  the  deareft  Hour  I  have  ^enjoyed  for 
many  Days,  if  not  Weeks.  I  found  an  encouraging  Hope, 
that  fomcthing  would  be  done  for  God,  and  that  God  would 
ufe  and  help  me  in  his  Work.  And  Oh,  how  fweet  were  th« 
Thoughts  of  labouring  for  God,  when  I  feltmySpiritandCourage, 
and  had  any  Hope  that  ever  I  fliould  be  fucceeded  I 

[  The  next  Day,  his  School-MaJIer  was  taken  Sick  with  a 
Pleurify  ;  and  he  fpent  great  Part  of  theRemainder  of  thisVVeek 
in  tending  him  :  which  in  his  weak  State  was  alnioft  an  over- 
bearingBuriJen  to  him  ;  he  being  obliged  coniiantly  to  waif  upoa 
him,  all  Day,  from  Day  toDay,and  to  lie  on  the  Floor  at  Night. 
His  Spirits  funk  in  a  conriderableDegree,with  his  bodily  Stiength, 
under  this  Burden. 

For  Saturday,  and  Lord's- Day,  March  2p,  h  30.  See  the 
publick  Journal, 

Monday,  ^art/;  31.  Towards  Night,  enjoyed  fome  fweet 
Meditations  on  thofe  Words,  //  is  good  for  me  to  draw  near  is 
God,  My  Soul,  I  think,  had  fome  fweet  Senfe  of  what  is  in* 
tended  in  thofe  VVords,  » 

[  The  next  Day, he  was  extremely  bufy  in  tending  the  School- 
Mjfter,  and  in  fome  other neceflary  AiFairs,that  greatly  diverted, 
him  from  what  he  looked  upon  as  his  proper  Bafinefs  :   But  ycc 
fpeaks  of  Comfort  ^and  Refrefhment,  at  fome  Times  of   the 

A  a  a  Wedaefday, 


178    JEt.iS:  "Tbi  LIFE 

Wedncfday,  April «.  Was  fomewhat  cxercifed  with  a  fplrlt- 
lefs  Frame  of  Mind.  Was  a  little  relieved  and  refrefli'd  in  the 
Evening,  with  Meditation  alone  in  the  Woods.  But  alas,  my 
Days  pafs  away  as  the  Chaf!  'Tis  but  little  I  do,  or  can  do, 
that  turns  toanyAccount  ;  and  'tis  my  conttant  Mifery  andBur- 
den^  that  1  am  fo  fruithrfs  in  the  Vineyard  of  the  Lord.  Oh  that 
I  were  Spirit,  that  I  might  bea6livc  for  God.  This  (  I  think  ) 
more  than  any  Thing  elfe,  makes  me  long,  that  this  corruptible 
might  put  on  Jncorruptioriy^nd  this  mortal  put  on  Immortality,  God 
deliver  me  from  Clogs,  Fetters,and  a  Body  ofDeathy  that  impede 
xny  Service  for  him. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  complains  bitterly  of  fome  Exercifes  by 
Corruption  he  found  in  his  own  Hearts] 

Friday,  yfpril  4..  Spent  moftof  the  Day  in  writing  on  Rev, 
3cxii.  17.  And  whofoever  will,  &c.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and 
EncQiiragement  in  my  Work  ;  and  found  fome  Comfort  and 
Compofure  in  Prayer. 

Saturday,  April  5. —  After  publick  Worfhip,  a  Number 

of  my  dear  Chriitian  Indians  came  to  my  Houfe  ;  with  whom 
1  felt  a  fweet  Union  of  Soul  :  My  Heart  was  knit  to  them  ;  and 
I  cin't  fay,  1  have  felt  fuch  a  fweet  and  fervent  Love  to  the  Bre^ 
thren,  for  fome  Time  paft  :  And  1  faw  in  them  Appearances  of 
the  fame  Love.  This  gave  me  fomething  of  a  View  of  the  hea- 
venly Stare  ;  and  particularly  that  Part  of  the  Happinefs  of  Hea- 
ven, which  coriiifts  in  the  Communion  of  Saints :  and  this  was 
affedling  tome. 

[  For  the  (wo  next  Days,  fee  the  publick  Journal. 

On  Tuer!av,he  went  to  aMeetmg  of  the  Prefbytery  appointed 
at  Elifabelh-Town.  in  his  Way  thither,  he  enjoyed  fome  fweec 
Me^liati  jns :  But  after  he  came  there,  he  was  (as  he  cxprefles 
it  )  vcrv  vop'iurv  tjnd  rneinnchnly^  and  under  an  awful  Gloom,  that 
opprefled  his  Mind.  And  this  continued  *till  Saiurday-Evening, 
when  he  beg.  n  to  have  fome  Relief  and  Encouragement.  He 
fpent  the  Sabbath  at  Staten-l(land  ;  where  he  preach*d  to  an 
Aflcrnbly  of  Dutch  and  Engl'tftj^  and  enjoyed  confiderable  Re- 
frefnmcnt  and  Cunifort,  both  in  pnblick  and  private.  In  the 
Even  11.*^,  he  rcturjied  to  lilifcbfth-Town.] 

Montiay,  /^(^ril  14.  My  Spirits  this  Day  were  raifed  and  re- 
(fcfl/d,  an. I  my  Mind  compofcd,  fo  that  [  was  in  a  comfor tabic 
Kr^meGi  Suul,  mnfl  of  the  Day.   In  ih*  Evening,  my  Head  wa$ 

cleui^ 


of  Mr,  David  Bralnerd.      A.D.  1 746.     1 79 

clear,  my  Mind  ferene;  I  enjoyed  Sweetnefs  in  fecretPfayer,and 
Meditation  onPfaL  Ixxiii.  28.  Oh,  how  frecjhow  comfartable, 
cheerful,  and  yet Tolemn  do  I  feel  when  I  am  in  a  good  Meafurc 
freed  from  thofe  Damps  and  melancholy  Glooms,  that  I  often 
labour  under  I  And  biefTed  be  the  Lord,  1  find  my  felf  re- 
lieved in  this  Refpedl. 

Tiiefday,  Jprili^»  My  Soul  longed  for  more  Spirituality  ; 
and  it  was  my  Burden,  that  I  could  do  no  more  for  God.  Oh, 
my  Barrennefs  \s  my  daily  AffliiSlion  and  heavy  Load  !  Oh,  how 
precious  is  Time  :  and  how  it  pains  mc,  to  fee  it  Aide  away, 
while  I  do  fo  very  little  to  any  good  Purpofe !  Oh  thatGod  would 
make  me  more  fruitful  and  fpiritual, 

[The  next  Day,  hefpeaks  of  his  being  almoft  overwhelmed 
with  vapoury  Dlforders  ;  but  yet  not  fo  as  wholly  to  deftroy  the 
Compofure  of  his  Mind.] 

Thurfday,  jfpril  17.  Enjoyed  fome  Comfort  in  Prayer,  fome 
Freedom  in  Meditation,  and  Compofure  in  my  Studies.  Spent 
fome  Time  in  writing,  in  the  Forenoon.  In  the  Afternoon, 
fpent  fome  Time  in  Converfation  with  feveral  dear  Minifters. 
In  the  Evening,  preach'd  from  Pjal.  Ixxiii*  28.  But  it  is  good 
for  me  io  draw  near  to  God,  God  helped  me  to  feel  the  Truth 
of  my  Text,  both  in  the  firft  Prayer  and  in  Sermon.  I  was 
enabled  to  pour  out  my  Soul  to  God,  with  great  Freedom,  Fer- 
vency, and  AfFedtion  :  And,  blefled  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  com- 
fortable Seafon  to  mc.  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with  Tendernefs, 
and  yet  with  Faithfulnefs:  And  divine  Truths  feemed  to  fall 
with  Weight  and  Influerffe  upon  the  Hearers.  My  Heart  was 
melted  for  the  dear  AfTembly,  and  I  loved  every  Body  in  it  ;  and 
fcarce  ever  felt  more  Love  to  immortal  Souls  in  my  Life  ;  my 
Soul  cried,  Oh  that  the  dear  Creatures  might  he  Javed  I  Oh  that 
God  luould  have  Mercy  on  them  I 

[  He  feems  to  have  been  in  a  very  comfortable  Frame  of  Mind 
the  two  next  Days.] 

Lord  V Day, y/pn7  20.  %  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom, and,  I  hope, 
Exercife  of  Faith  in  Prayer,  in  the  Morning  -,  efpecially  when 
I  came  to  pray  for  'Zion,  I  was  free  from  that  gloomyDifcour* 
agement,  that  fo  often  opprefl'es  my  Mind  ;  and  mySoul  rejoyc- 
€d  in  the  Hopes  of  Zion' s  Profperity,  aai  the  Enlargement  of  the 
dear  Kingdom  of  the  grea,t  Redeemer.  Oh  that  his  Kingdom 
might  come I 


X  This  D^y  he  enter'd  into  the  29/^  Year  of  his  Age. 

Moflday 


iSo    JEs.  2g:  7^^  LIFE 

Monday,  Jprii 21.  Was  compofed  and  comfortable  inMind, 
moft  of  iheDay :  Was  mercifully  freed  from  thofe  gloomy  Damps, 
that  I  am  frequently  exercifed  with  :  Had  Freedom  and  Com- 
fort in  Prayer,  feveral  Times  ;  efpecialiy  had  feme  rifmg  Hopes 
of  Zion's  Enlargement  and  Profperity.  And  Oh,  how  refrefhing 
were  thefe  Hopes  to  my  Soul  !  Oh  that  the  Kingdom  of  the 
dear  Lord  might  come.  Oh  that  the  poor  Indians  might  quick- 
]y  be  gathered  in,  in  great  Numbers. 

Tuefday,  Jpril  22.  My  Mind  was  remarkably  free,  thisDay, 
from  melancholy  Damps  and  Glooms,  and  animated  in  my 
Work.  I  found  fuch  frefh  Vigour  and  Refolution  in  the  Ser- 
vice of  God,  that  the  Mountains  fcem*d  to  become  a  Plain  be- 
fore me.  Oh,  biefTed  be  God  for  an  Interval  of  Refrefhment, 
and  fervent  Refolution  in  my  Lord's  Work  !  In  the  Evening, 
my  Soul  was  refrefh'd  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  my  Heart  drawn  out 
for  divine  Bleffings  ;  efpecialiy  for  the  Church  of  God,  and  his 
Intereft  among  my  own  People,  and  for  dear  Friends  in  remote 
Places.  Oh  that  Zion  might  profper,  and  precious  Souls  be 
brought  home  to  God  ! 

[  In  this  comfortable  fervent  Frame  of  Mind  he  remain*d  th« 
two  next  Days. 

For  the  four  Days  next  following,  viz,  Friday,  Saturday, 
Lord's- Day,  and  Monday,  fee  his  publick  ^ournaL  •  •  '  On 
Tuefday  he  went  to  £'///j^(?//?-7i7i(;«,  to  attend  the  meeting  of 
the  Prifiytery  there  :  And  feem'd  to  fpend  the  Time,  while 
abfcnt  from  his  People  on  this  Oecafion,  in  a  free  and  comfort- 
able State  of  Mind.  J 

Saturday,  A<f£!y  3.  Rode  from  EUfaheth-Town  home  to  my 
People,  at  or  near  Cranberry  ;  whither  they  are  now  removed, 
and  where,  I  hope,  God  will  fettle  them  as  a  Chriftian  Congre- 
gation. Was  refrefh'd  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  to  God,  while 
riding  ;  and  enjoyed  a  thankful  Frame  of  Spirit,  for  divine  Fa- 
vours fecciv'd  the  Week  pafl.  Was  fomewhat  uneafy  and 
dejeded,  in  the  Evening  ;  having  no. Houfe  cf  roy  own  to  gg 
into  in  this  Place  :  But  God  was  my  Support. 

[  Fur  Lord's-Day  and  Mond3y,See  the  publickj^'tt^^^/    ] 

Tuefday,  May  6.  Enjoy'd  fome  Spirit  and  Courage  in  my 
Woik  J  was  in  a  good  Meafurc  free  from  Melancholy  :  BlefTcd 
be  God  for  Freedom  from  ibis  Death. 

Wednefday, 


of  Mr,  David  Brainer^        A.D.  1 745.    1 8  i 

Wednefday,  May  7.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day  in  writing,  as 
ufual.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in  my  Work.  Was  favoured 
with  fome  comfortable  Meditations,  this  Day.  In  theEvening, 
was  in  a  fweet  compofed  Frame  of  Mind  :  ,Wa8  pleafed  and  de- 
lighted to  leave  all  with  God,  refpcaing  my  felf,  for  Time  and 
Eternity,  and  refpedting  the  People  of  my  Charge,  and  dear 
Friends  :  Had  no  Doubt  but  that  God  would  take  Care  of  mcj 
and  of  his  own  Intereft  among  my  People  :  And  was  enabled  ta 
ufe  Freedom  in  Prayer,  as  a  Child  with  a  tender  Father.  Oh» 
how  fweet  is  fuch  a  Frame  I 

Thurfday,  May  8.  In  the  Evening,  was  fome  what  refrefh'd 
with  divine  Things,  and  enjoyed  a  tender  melting  Frame  in  fe- 
cret  Prayer,  wherein  my  Soul  was  drawn  out  for  the  Interefl  of 
Z/«»,  and  comforted  with  the  lively  Hope  of  the  appearing  of 
the  Kingdom  of  the  great  Redeemer.  Thefe  were  fweet  Mo- 
ments :  I  felt  almoft  loth  to  go  to  Bed,  and  grieved  that  Sleep, 
was  neceflary.  However,  Hay  down  with  a  tender  reverential 
Fear  of  God,  fenfible  that  his  Favour  is  Life^  and  his  Smilea 
better  than  all  that  Earth  can  boaft  of,  infinitely  better  than 
Life  it  felf. 

[  Friday,  May  9.  See  the  publick  Journal  ] 

Saturday,  May  10.  Rode  to  AlkrCs-Town^  to  aiHft  in  theAd- 
miniftration  of  theLord's-Supper.  In  the  Afternoon,  preached 
from  T//.  ii.  14.  Who  gave  him  felf  for  us,  &c.  God  was  pleafed 
to  carry  me  thro'  with  fome  Competency  of  Freedom  j  and  yet 
to  deny  me  that  Enlargement  and  Power  I  long'd  for.  In  the 
Evening,  my  Soul  mourn'd,and  could  not  biitmourn,  that  I  had 
treated  fo  excellent  a  Subjedl  in  fo  6efe€iivQ  aManner,thatI  had 
born  fo  broken  a  Teftimony  for  fo  worthy  and  glorious  a  Re- 
deemer. And  if  myDifcourfe  had  met  with  the  utmoftApplaufe 
from  all  the  World  (  as  I  accidentally  heard  it  applauded  by  fome 
Perfons  of  Judgment  )  it  would  not  have  given  me  any  Satis- 
faction :  Oh,  ir  grieved  me,  to  think,  that  I  had  had  no  more 
holy  Warmth  and  Fervency,  that  I  had  been  no  more  melted 
in  difcourfing  of  Chrift's  Death,  and  the  End  and  Defign 
of  it  !  Afterwards,  enjoyed  fome  Freedom  and  Fervency  in  fe- 
cret  and  Family-Prayer,  and  longed  much  for  the  Prefence  of 
God  to  attend  his  Word  and  Ordinances  the  next  Day. 

Lord's- Day,  AJay  11.  Affifted  in  the  Adminiftration  of  the 
Lord's-Supper  ;.  but  enjoyed  little  Enlargement  :  Was  grieved 
and  funk  with  fome  Things  I  thought  undefirable,  l^c.  In  the 
Afternoon,  went  to  the  Houfs  of   God   weak  and  fick  in  Soul, 

as 


182      JEt,  29:  ne  LIFE 

as  well  as  feeble  in  Body  :  And  longed,  that  the  People  might 
be  cntertain'd  and  edified  with  divine  Truths,  and  that  an  honeft 
fervent  Teftimony  might  be  born  for  God ;  but  knew  not  how 
it  was  poflible  for  »<  to  do  any  Thingof  that  Kind,  to  any  good 
Purpofe.  Yet-x-God,  who  is  rich  in  Mercy,  was  pleafed  to  give 
me  AiTiftance,  both  in  Prayer  and  Preaching  :  God  helped  me 
to  wreftle  for  his  Prefence,  in  Prayer,  and  to  tell  him,  that  h« 
had  promifcd.  Where  two  or  three  are  met  together  in  his  Name^ 
there  he  would  be  in  the  midfl  of  them  5  and  that  we  were,  at  leaft 
fome  of  us,  fo  met  5  and  pleaded,  that  for  his  Truth's  fake  he 
would  be  wiih  us.  And  blefled  be  God,  it  was  fweet  to  my 
Soul,  thus  to  plead,  and  rely  on  God's  Promifes.  Difcourfed 
upon  Luke  ix.  30,  31.  And  hehoU^there  talked  with  him  twoMeUy 
which  were  Mofes  and  Elias  ;  who  appeared  in  Glory^  and  fpake 
ef  his  Deceafe^  which  he /houldaccomplijhat]txuh\^m.  Enjoyed 
fpccialFreedom,  from  theBeginning  to  the  End  of  myDifcourfe, 
without  Interruption.  Things  pertinent  to  the  Subjed  were 
•abundantly  prefented  to  my  View,  and  fuch  a  Fulnefs  of  Mat- 
ter, that  I  fcarce  knew  how  to  difmifs  the  various  Heads  and 
Particulars  I  had  Occafion  to  touch  upon.  And,  blefled  be  the 
Lord,  1  was  favoured  with  fome  Fervency  and  Power,  as  well  as 
i'reedom  ;  fo  that  the  Word  of  God  feem'd  to  awaken ihe At- 
tention of  a  ftupid  Audience,  to  a  confiderable  Degree.  I  was 
inwardly  refrefh'd  with  the  Confolations  of  God  ;  and  could 
with  my  whole  Heart  fay,  Tho^  there  be  no  Fruit  in  the  Fine, Sic, 
yit  will  I  rtjosce  in  the  Lord,  After  publick  Service,  was  rcfrcfh'd 
with  the  fweet  Conveifation  of  fome  Chriftian  Friends. 

[  The  four  next  Days  fccm  to  have  been  moftly  fpcnt  with 
fpiritual  Comfort  and  Profit.  ] 

F^riday,  ^/tfy  16.  Near  Night,  enjoyed  fome  agreeable  and 
fweet  ConverfatJQn  with  a  dear  Minifter,  which,  I  truft,  was 
biefs'd  to  my  Soul  :  My  Heart  W3s  warmed,  and  my  Soul  en- 
gaged to  live  to  God  ;  (o  that  I  longed  to  exert  my  felf  with 
more  Vigour,  than  ever  I  had  done,  in  his  Caufe  :  And  thofe 
Words  were  quickniiig  to  mt^  Herein  is  my  Father  glorified^  that 
ye  bring  forth  much  Fruit,  Oh,  my  Soul  longed,  and  wi(h'd,and 
^rav'd,  to  be  enabled  to  live  to  God  with  utmoft  Conftancy  and 
Ardour  !  \n  the  Evening,  Cjodwas  pleafed  to  fliine  upon  me  in 
fecret  Prayer,  and  draw  cut  my  Soul  after  himfelf  ;  and  I  had 
Freedcm  in  "supplication  for  my  felf,  but  much  more  in  Inter- 
ccffiun  for  otbcrs :  So  that  I  wa«  fweetly  conftrain'd  to  fay,£ffr(/, 

uft 


of  Mr.  David  Brainefd.     A.D.  1 74^.     1 S^ 

ufs  me  as  thou  wilt ;  do  as  ihou  wilt  with  me :  But  Oh,  pro" 
mote  thine  own  Caufe.  Zion  is  thine -,  Oh  vt/it  thine  Her  itage  i 
Oh  let  thy  Kingdom  come  ;  Oh  let  thy  blejfed  Inter efi  he  advanced 
in  the  World,  When  I  attempted  to  look  to  God,  rcfpe6l- 
ing  my  worldly  Circumftances,  and  his  providential  Deal- 
ings with  me,  inRegard  of  my  fettling  down  in  my  Congregati- 
on, which  feems  to  be  neceflary,  and  yet  very  difRcult,  and 
contrary  to  my  fix'd  Intention  for  Years  paft,  as  well  as  my 
Difpofition,  which  has  been,  and  ftill  is,  at  Times  efpecially,  to 
go  forth,  and  fpend  my  Life  in  preaching  theGofpel  from  Place 
to  Place,  and  gathering  Souls  afar  offt^  Jesus  the  great  Re- 
deemer ;  when  I  attempted  to  look  to  God  with  Regard  to 
tbefe  Things,  and  hisDefigns  concerning  me,  I  could  only  Tiy, 
Hhe  IVill  of  the  Lord  be  done  :  'Tis  no  Matter  for  mQ*  Tic 
fame  Frame  of  Mind  I  felt  with  Refpe6l  to  another  important 
Affair  1  have  lately  had  fome  ferious  Thot's  of :  I  could  fay, 
with  utmoft  Calmnefs  and  Compofurc,  Lard^  if  it  hs  mofi  fsr 
thy  Glory  ^  let  me  proceed  in  it  \  hut  if  thou  fee  ft  that  it  will  in  any 
wife  hinder  my  lJfefulnef$  in  thy  Caufe^  Oh  prevent  my  proceeding: 
For  all  1  want,  refpe^ing  this  fVorld,  is  fuch  Circumftances  as 
may  left  capacitate  me  to  do  Sefvice  for  God  in  the  World.  But 
bleffed  be  God,  I  enjoyed  Liberty  in  Prayer  for  my  dear  Flock, 
and  was  enabled  to  pour  out  my  Soul  into  theBofom  cf  a  tender 
Father  :  My  Heart  within  me  was  melted,  when  I  came  to 
plead  for  my  dear  People,  and  for  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift  m 
gfc^neral.  Ob,  how  fweet  was  this  Evening  to  my  Soul  f  [  knew? 
not  how  to  go  to  Bed  ;  and  when  got  to  Bed,  longed  for 
fome  Way  to  improve  Time  for  God,  to  fome  excellent 
Purpofe.     Blefs  the  Lord^  O  my  SouL 

Saturday,  May  17.  VValk'd  out  in  the  Morning,  and  fc!t 
much  of  the  fame  Frame  I  enjoyed  the  Evening  before  :  Had 
my  Heart  enlarged  in  praying  for  xhs  Advancement  oi  the 
Kingdom  of  Chrift,  and  found  uimoft  Freedom  in  leaving  all 
my  Concerns  with  God. 

I  find  Difcuuragement  to  be  an  exceeding  Hindrance  to  my 
fpiritual  Fervency  and  Affedion  :  But  when  God  enables  nrc 
fenfib'y  to  find  that  1  have  done  fome  thing  for  Him^  this  r.;- 
frefbes  and  animates  me,  fo  that  I  could  break  (hrb^all  Hi«rt-i- 
ih:u?,  undergo  any  Labours, and  nothing  feems  too  much  cither 
Ici  ao  or  to  fuffcr.  But  Oh,  what  a  Death  it  15,  to  ftrive.and 
E»ive  ;  to  be  always  in  a  Hurry,  and  yet  do  Nothings  or  at,  leaft 
nothing  for  God  I  Alas,  Alas,  that  Time  flies  away,  an J  I  do 
!b  iitile  for  God  I 

B  b  Lord's-Day» 


;S4    ^A  29.  The  LIFE 

Lord's  Da) ,  May  18.  I  felt  my  own  utter  Infufficicncy  for 
my  Work  :  God  made  me  to  fee,  that  I  was  2iChild  ;  yea,that 
I  was  a  /W.  1  diTcourfed,  both  Parts  of  the  Day,  from  Rev, 
iii,  10.  Behold^  1  /i^nd  at  the  Door^  and  knock.  God  gave  mc 
pVecdom  and  Power  in  the  latter  Part  of  my  (Forenoon's)  Dif- 
courfe  ;  altho*,  in  the  former  Part  of  it,  I  felt  peevifh  and  pro- 
voked with  the  unmannerly  Behaviour  of  the  white  People,who 
croudcd  in  between  my  People  and  me  ;  which  proved  a  great 
Temptation  to  me.  But  blefled  be  God,  I  got  thefe  Shackles 
oft  before  the  middle  of  my  Difcourfe,  and  was  favoured  v\^itl» 
a  fweet  Frame  of  Spirit  in  the  latterPart  of  the  Exercife  ;  was 
full  0/  Love,  Warmth,  and  Tendernefs,   in  addreffing  my  dear 

People, In  the  Intermiffion-Seafon,  could  not  but  dif- 

courie  to  my  People  on  the  Kindnefs  and  Patience  of  Chrift  \n 

ftanding  and  knocking  at  the  Door^  &c. In  the  Evening,  I 

was  grieved,  that  I  had  done  fo  little  forGod.     Oh  that  I  could 
be  a  Flame  of  Fire  in  the  Service  of  my  God. 

[  Monday,  May  19.   See  the  publick  Journal, 
On  Tuefday  he  complains  of  Want  of  Freedom  andComfortJ 
but  had  lome  Return  of  thefe  on  Wednefday.  ] 

Thurfday,  May  22.  In  the  Evening,  was  in  aFrame  fomc- 
what  remarkable  :  Had  apprehended  for  feveral  Days  before^ 
that  it  was  the  Defignof  Providence  I  fhouldy>///^  among  my 
People  here  ;  and  had  in  my  own  Mind  begun  to  mzkz  Pro- 
vifion  for  it,  and  to  contrive  Means  to  haflen  it  ;  and  found 
my  Hear:  fomething  engaged  in  it,  hoping  I  might  then  enjoy 
more  agreableCircumftances  of  Life,  in  feveral  Refpedts :  And 
yet  was  never  fully  determined,  never  quite  pleafed  with  the 
.Thoughts  of  being  fettled  and  confin'd  to  one  Place.  Never- 
thelels  I  fcem*d  to  have  fome  Freedom  in  that  Refpe6l,becaufc 
the  Congregation  I  thought  of  fettling  with,  was  one  that  God 
had  enabled  mc  to  gather  from  arnongft  Pagam.  For  I  never 
iincc  I  be^an  to  preach,  could  feel  any  Freedom  to  enter  into 
ether  Men'i  Lahcurs.zud  fettle  down  in  the  Miniltry  where  the 
Gofpel  UJOi  preached  before  ;  I  never  could  make  that  appear  to 
be  my  Province  :  When  I  felt  any  Dirpohtioii  to  confu'lt  my 
tare  and  worldly  Comforf,  God  has  never  given  me  any  Liber* 
ty  in  that  Ref]je6l,  either  fince,  or  for  Years  b:f.  :c  l  b^cri,n 
to  preach.  But  God  having  fucceeded  my  Labours,  and  iT::&4^ 
'^'  Tiftrutmental  cf  gathering  a  Church  for  him  amonfr  -- 
'   •    rii^  i  W43  ;cady  to  ihiRk,  it  mi^ht  be  hi^^t^ign  Co  i 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.  'A.D,  174^;     185 

a  quiet  Settlement  and  a  ftated  Home  of  my  own.     And  this, 
confidenr?:  the  late  frequent  Sinking  and  Failure  of  my  Spirits, 
and  the  Need  I  flood  in  of  fome  agreable  Society,  and  my  great 
Defire  of  enjoying  Conveniencies  and  Opportunities  for  profi- 
table Studies,  was  not  altogether  difagreable  to  me  :  Altbo* 
I  Hdl  wanted  to  go  about  far  and  wide,  in  order  to  fpread  the 
blelTed  Gofpsl  among  benighted  Souls,  far  remote  ;  yet  I  never 
had  been  fo  willing  to  fettle  in  any  one  Place, for  more  than  five 
Years  paft,  ?.s  I  was  in  the  foregoing  Part  of  this  Week.     But 
now  thefe  Thoughts  feem'd  to  be  wholly  da(h'd  to  Pieces  ; 
not  by  Neceflity,  but  of  Choice  :  For  it  appeared  to  me,  that 
God'sDealings  towards  me  had  fitted  me  for  a  Life  of  Solitari- 
nefs  and  Harrifhip  ;  it  appeared  to  me,  I  had  nothing  to  hSe^ 
nothing  to  do  with  Earth,  and  confequently  nothing  to  lofe  by 
a  total   Renunciation  of  it  :  And  it  appeared  juft  right,  that  I 
fhould  be  deftitute  of  Houfe  and  Home,  and  many  Comiorts  of 
Life,  which  I  rejoyced   to  fee  others  of  God's  People  enjoy. 
And  at  the  fams  Time,  I  faw  fo  much  of  the  Excellency  of 
Chrift*s  Kingdom,  and  the  infinite  Defirabienefs  of  it's  Ad- 
vancement in  the  World,  that  it  fwallowed  up  all  my  other 
Thoughts  ;  and    made  me  willing,   yea,  even  rejo)  ce,   to  be 
made  a  Pilgrim   or   Hermit  in  the  Wildernv^-fs,   (o  my  dying 
Moment,  if  I  might  thereby  promote  the  blefTed  Intereft  of  the 
great  Redeemer.     And  if  ever  my  Soul  piefented  it  fclf  to  God 
for  his  Service, without  anyReferve  of  any  Kind,  it  did  fo  now. 
The  Language  of  my  Thoughts  and  Difpofition  (  altho*  I  fyzkt 
no  Words)  now  were,   "  Here  I  am^  Lord,  fend  me  ;  (ttid 
•'  me  to  the  Ends  of  the  Earth  ;  fend  me  to  (he  rough,  the 
*'  favage  Pagam  of  the   Wildernefs  ;  fend  me  from  all  that 
•*  is  called  Comfort  in  Earth,  or  earthly  Comfort  ;  fend  me 
*^  even  to  Death  it  felf,  if  it  be  but  in  thy  Service,  and  to  p^re- 
*«  mote  thy  Kingdom."  And  at  the  fameTime  i  had  asqu-ck 
and  lively  a  Senfe  of  the  Value  of  worldly  Comforts,  as  ever  I 
had  ;  but  only  faw  them  infinitely  overmatch'd  by  the  Worfh 
of  Chrift's  Kingdom,  and  the  Propagation  of  his  blefledGofpa/. 
The  quiet  Settlement,  the  certain  Place  of  Abode,  the  tendet 
Friendfhip,  which  I  thought  I  might  be  likely  to  enjoy  in  Con- 
fequence  of  fuch  Circumftances,  appeared  as  valuable  to   me, 
confidcrcd  abfolutely  and  in  themfelves,  as  ever  before  ;  but 
confider'd   comparatively,  they  appeared  nothing  .*  Compared 
with  the  Value  and  Precioufnefs  of  an  Enlargement  of  Chi  ifl's 
Kingdom,    they  vanifhM  like  the  Stars   before  the  rifing  Sun. 
Aad  furc  I  aai)  that  altho'  the  comfortab'eAcconimodations  of 

B  b  a  Life 


iS6     yfi/.  29;  ^ie  LIFE 

Life  appeared  taluable  and  dear  to  me,  yet  I  did  furrendcr  and 
refiu^n  my  felf.  Soul  and  Bodyy  to  the  Service  of  God,  and  Pro- 
morion  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  ;  tbo'  it  fhould  be  in  the  Lofs  of 
them  all.  Ana  I  could  not  do  any  other,  becaufe  I  could  not 
will  or  chufe  any  other.  I  was  conftrained,  and  yet  chofe,  to 
fay,  Farewelly  Friends  and  earthly  Comforts^  the  deareji  of  them 
ell,  the  very  dear  eft  ^  if  the  Lord  colli  for  it  ;  Adieu^  Adieu  ;  I'll 
fpend  my  Lif^^  to  my  latejl  Momently  in  Caves  and  Dens  of  the 
Earth,  if  the  Kingdom  of  Chriji  may  thereby  be  advanced^  I  found 
extraordi-nary  Freedom  at  this  Time  in  pouring  out  my  Soul  to 
God,  for  his  Caufe ;  and  efpecially  that  his  Kingdom  might 
be  extended  among  the  Indiansy  far  remote  ;  and  I  had  a  great 
and  ftrong  Hope,  thatGod  would  do  it.  I  continued  wreftling 
with  God  in  Prayer  for  my  dear  little  Flock  here  ;  and  more 
efpecially  for  the  Indians  elfewhere  ;  as  well  as  for  dearFriends 
in  one  Place  and  another ;  'till  it  was  Bed-Time,  and  I  fear'd 
Ifhould  hinder  the  Family,  ^c.  But  Oh,  with  whatReluc- 
tancy  did  1  find  my  XeU  obliged  to  confume  Time  in  Sleep  ! 
i  longed  to  be  as  a  Flame  of  Fire^  continually  glowing  in  the 
divine  Service,  preaching  and  building  up  Chrift's  Kingdom, 
to  my  lateft,  my  dying  Moment. 

Friday,  May  23.  In  the  Morning,  was  in  the  fame  Frame 
of  Mind, as  in  the  Evening  before.  TheGlory  of  Chrift'sKmg- 
dom  fo  much  out-fhone  the  Pleafure  of  earthly  Accommodati- 
ons and  Enjoyments,  that  they  appeared  comparatively  Nothing, 
tho*  in  themfelves  good  and  defirable.  My  Soul  was  melted 
in  fecret  Meditation  and  Prayer,  and  I  found  my  h\f  divorced 
trom  anyPart  in  this  World  ;  fo  that  m  thofe  Affairs  that  feena'd 
of  the  greateft  Importance  to  me,  in  refpe^l  of  the  prefentLife, 
and  thofe  wherein  the  tender  Powers  of  the  Mind  are  moft 
fcndhly  touched,  I  could  only  fay,  The  Will  of  the  Lordbedone^ 
Bu:  ji:{t  the  fame  Things  that  I  felt  the  Evening  before,  I  felt 
n3  V  ;  aRd  found  the  fame  Freedom  in  Prayer  for  the  People 
of  myChtrge,  for  the  Propagation  of  the  Gofpel  among  the 
Jnaiay^s^  and  lor  the  Enlargement  and  fpiritual  Welfare  of  Zion 
i*»  ^<:aeraU  and  my  dear  Friends  in  particular,  now,  as  I  did 
fixri  ;  and  longed  Co  burn  out  in  one  continued  Flame  for  God. 
Recain'd  rnucn  of  the  fame  Frame  through  the  Day,  In  the 
Vv.Miing.  wr.s  viiitcd  by  my  Brother  John  Brainerd:  The  firft 
Vifit  1  have  ever  received  «rom  any  near  Relative,  fince  I  have 
been  a  Mifiion^ry.  Felt  the  fame  Frame  of  Spirit  in  the  Even- 
ing, as  in  the  M.'rning  i  and  found  ihzt  it  zuas  good  for  ae  (a 
.ivuiii  ^ffir  to  God^  \^m  lertVCHll  my  Concerns  and  Burdezis  witb 

hinic 


(?/ Mr.  David  Bra  r.erd.       .4.0,1745.     187 

bira.  Was  enlarged  and  refrefh'd  in  pouring  out  my  Soul  for 
the  Propagation  of  the  Gofpel  of  the  Pvedeemer  among  the 
diftant  Tribes  of  Indians.  BlefTed  be  God.  If  ever  I  fill'd  up  a 
Day  with  Studies  and  Devotion,  I  was  enabled  fo  to  fill  up  this 
Day. 

Saturday,  May  24.  Enjoyed   this  Day  fomething  of 

the  fame  Frame  of  Mind  as  I  felt  the  Day  before. 

[  Lord  VDay,  May  25.     S&e  the  publick  Journal. 

This  Week,  at  leaft  the  former  Part  of  it,  he  was  in  a  very 
.w-eak  State  :  but  yet  feems  to  have  been  free  frorii Melancholy » 
which  often  had  attended  the  failing  of  his  bodily  Strength.  He 
from  Time  to  Time  fpeaks  of  Comfort  and  inward  Refrefh- 
mcnt,  this  Week. 

Lorxl's-Day  June  i.  See  the  publick  y^arna/.  J 

Monday,  June  2.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  fome  Freedom 
in  fecret  Prayer  and  Meditation. 

Tuefday,  June  3.  My  Soul  rejoyced,  early  in  the  Morning, 
to  think,  that  all  Things  wereatGod's  Difpofal.  Oh,  it  pleafed 
me,  to  leave  'em  there  !  Felt  afterwards  much  as  I  did,  on 
Thurfday  Evening,  May  22.  laft;  and  continued  in  this  Frame 
for  feveral  Hours.  Walked  out  into  the  Wildernefs,  and  en- 
joyed Freedom,  Fervency, andComfort,  in  Prayer  :  And  sgain 
enjoyed  the  fame  in  the  Evening. 

W^datidsiyy  June  4.  Spent  the  Day  in  Writing,  ami  en- 
joyed fome  Comfort,  Satisfa<5tion,  and  Freedom  in  my  Work. 
In  the  Evening,  I  was  favoured  with  a  fweet  refrefliing  Frame 
of  Soul  in  fecret  Prayer  and  Meditation.  Prayer  was  now 
wholly  turned  into  Praife  ;  and  I  could  dd  little  elfe  but  fry  to 
adore  and  blefs  the  living  God  :  The  Wonders  of  his  Grace 
difplay'd  in  gathering  to  himfelf  a  Church  among  the  poor  In- 
dians  here, were  the  Subjedl- Matter  of  my  Meditation,  and  the 
Occafion  of  exciting  my  Soul  to  praife  and  blefs  his  Name. 
MySoul  was  fcarceever  more  difpofed  to  inquire, ^"/^^z  1  fhouli 
render  to  God  for  all  his  Benefits^  than  at  this  Time.  Oh,  I  was 
brought  into  a  Strait,  a  fweet  and  happy  Strait,  to  know  what 
to  do!  I  longed  to  make  fome  Returns  to  God  j  but  found  I 
had  nothing  to  return  :  I  could  only  rejoyce,that  God  had  done 
the  .Work  himfelf ;  and  that  none  in  Heaven  or  Earth  mi t^bi 
pretend  to  (hare  the  Honour  of  it  with  him  ;  I  could  only  be 
glad,  that  God's  declarative  Glory  was  advanced  by  the  Con- 
vcifion  of  tbefc  Seuls,  and  that  it  v;as  to  the  Eiilargement  of 

hit 


F.38  mt,  29.  ?^tf  LIFE 

his  Kingdom  in  the  World  :  But  faw  I  was  fo  poor,  that 
1  had  nothing  to  oiFcr  to  kirn.  My  Soul  and  Body, thro'  Grace, 
I  ceuld  chearfuliy  furrcnder  to  him:  But  it  appeared  to  me, 
this  was  rather  a  Cumber,  than  a  Gift  :  And  nothing  could  I  do 
to  glorify  his  dear  and  blefled  Name.  Yet  I  was  glad  at  Heart, 
that  he  was  unchangeably  poflefled  of  Glory  and  Bleflednefs. 
Oh  that  he  might  be  adored  and  praifed  by  all  his  intelligent 
Creatures,  to  the  utmoft  of  their  Powers  and  Capacities.  My 
Sc>ul  would  have  rejoyced  to  fee  others  praifc  him,  tho*  I  could 
do  nothing  towards  it  my  felf. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  his  belBg  fubjefl  to  fome  De- 
gree of  Melancholy ;  but  of  being  fomething  relieved  in  the 
Evening. 

Friday,  June  6.  See  the  publick  Journah  ] 

Saturday,  yune  7. Rode  to  Freeholtiy  to  aflift  Mr,  Ten- 

nent  in  the  Adminiftration  of  the  Lord's  Supper.  In  the  Af- 
ternoon, preaeh'd  from  Pf^tl,  Ixxiii.  28.  God  gave  me  fome 
Freedom  and  Warmth  in  my  Difcourfe  ;  and  1  truft,  his  Pre- 
fcnce  was  in  the  AfTembly.  Was  comfortably  compofed,  and 
enjoyed  a  thankful  Frame  of  Spirit ;  and  my  Soul  was  grieved, 
that  I  could  not  render  fomething  toGod  for  hisBenefiis  beftow- 
cd.     Oh  that  1  could  be  fwallowed  up  in  his  Praife  ! 

Lord's  Day,  yiww^  8.  Spent  much  Time,  in  the  Morning, 
in  fecret  Duties ;  but  between  Hope  and  Fear,  refpe^^ing  ilie 
Enjoyment  of  God  in  the  Bufinefs  of  th«  Day  then  before  bs. 
Was  agreeably  entertained, in  theForenoon,by  aDifcourfe  from 
Mr.  Tif/iwcw/,  and  felt  fomewhat  melted  and  refrefii'd.  In  the 
Seafon  of  Communion,  enjoyed  fome  Comfort ;  and  efpecially 
in  feiving  one  of  the  Tables.  BlelTed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a 
*T%ms  of  Refrefning  to  me,  and  I  truft,  to  many  others.  A 
Number  of  my  dear  People  fat  down  by  themfelves  at  the 
lafl  Table  ;  at  which  Time  God  feem*d  to  be  in  the  midft  of 

ihem, And  the  Thoughts  of  what  God  had  done  among 

them  were  refrefhing  &  melting  to  me.  In  iheAfternoon,God 
enabled  me  to  preach  with  uncommon  Freedom,  from  2  Cor,\, 
20.  Thro' the  great  Goodnefs  of  God,  I  was  favoured  with  a 
conftant  Flow  of  pertinent  Matter, and  properExpreffion?;,from 
the  Beginning  to  the  End  of  my  Difcourfe.  In  the  Even- 
ing, I  could  not  but  rejoice  in  God,  and  blefs  him  for  the  Mani* 
filiations  of  his  Ciiace  in  the  Day  paft.  Oh,  it  was  a  fwcet  and 
lolemn  Diy  and  Evening  |  A  Seafon  of  Comfoii:  cc  ihs  QoSy- 


(?/  iWr.  David  Braincrd.     A.D.  1745.      ig^ 

and  of  Awakning  to  fome  Souls.     Oh  that  I  could  praife  the 
Lord.' 

Monday, y«ff^  g.Enjoy'd  fomeSweetnels  infeGretDutics.— i 
Preach'(!  the  concluding  Sermon  from  Gen,  v.  24.  And  Enoch 
waihd  wifh  God^  &c.  God  gave  me  Enlargement  and  Fer- 
vency in  my  Difcourfe  ;  fo  that  I  was  enabled  to  fpeak  with 
Plainnefs  and  Power ;  and  God's Prefence  feem'd  to  be  in  the 
AfTembly.  Praifed  be  the  Lord,  it  was  a  fweet  Meeting,  a 
defitable  AiTembly.  I  found  my  Strength  renewedjand  length- 
ened out,  even  to  a  Wonder  ;  fo  that  I  felt  much  ftronger  at 
the  Concliifioii,  than  in  the  Beginning  of  this  Sacramental  So- 
Icninit).  I  have  great  Reafon  to  blefs  God  for  this  Solemnify, 
^  '  -rdn  i  hi.  t  found  Affiftance  in  addreffing others jandSweet- 
^.:^in  my  own  Soul. 

rOr»Tuerday,he  found  himfelf  fpent,  and  his  Spirits  cxhauft- 
-rc  b,  his  late  Labours  ;  and  on  Wednefday,  complains  of  va- 
poury Diforders,  and  Dejedion  of  Spirit,  and  of  enjoying  but 
little  Comfort  or  Spirituality.  ] 

Thurfday,  June  12.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  Freedom  of 
Mind,  and  fome  Sweetnefs  in  fecret  Prayer :  It  was  a  deiirabis 
Seafon  to  me  ;  my  Soul  was  enlarged  in  Prayer  foi  my  ov;a 
dear  People,  and  for  the  Enlargement  of  Chrift'sKingdom,and 
cfpecially  for  the  Propagation  of  the  Gofpel  among  the  Indians^ 
back  in  the  Wildernefs.  Was  refrefh'd  in  Prayer  for  dear 
Fiiends  in  New- England,  and  elfewhere  :  I  found  it  fweet  to 
pray  at  this  Time  ;  and  could  with  all  my  Heart  fay.  It  is  gQod 
for  me  to  draw  near  to  God, 

Friday,  June  13. 1  came  away   from   the  Meeting  of 

the  Indians,  this  Day,  rejoycingand  bleffing  God  for  his  Grace 
manifefled  at  this  Seafon. 

Saturday,  June  14.  Rode  to  KingJIon,  to  affift  the  Rev»  Mr, 
Wales  in  the  Adminiftration  of  the  Lord's  Supper.  In  "the  Af- 
ternoon, preach'd  ;  but  almoft  fainted  in  the  Pulpit :  Yet  God 
ftrengthen'd  me  when  I  was  juft  gone,  and  enabled  me  to  fpeak 
his  Word  with  Freedom,  Fervency  andApplication  to  theCou- 
fcience.  And  praifed  be  theLord  ;  Out  ofweaknefs  Iw^.s  if.ads 
Jirong.  I  enjoyed  fome  Sweetnefs,  in  and  after  piibIickVv''orOiipi 
but  was  extreamly  tired.  Oh,  how  many  are  the  Merc':s  of  thfc 
Lord  !  To  them  that  have  no  Might,  heincreafeth  Strey^gth, 

Lord's- Day,  June  15,   VVas  in  a  dejected  fpiritlefs   FramCj 
thi''  I  could  not  hold  up  my  Head,  nor  lock  any  Body  m  the 

Face* 


nj^    Mt,  29.  fT/^^LIFE 

Face.  Adminiftred  the  Lord's-Supper  at  Mr.  H^ajii*^  Defire: 
And  found  my  Celf  ina  good  Meafure  unburdenM  and  relieved 
of  my  preiHng  Load,  when  I  came  to  alk  a  Bleffing  on  theEle- 
ments  :  Here  God  gave  me  Enlargement,  and  a  tender  afFcG- 
tionate  Senfe  of  fpiritualThings ;  fo  that  it  was  aSeafon  ofCom- 
forf ,  in  fome  Meafure,  to  me,  and  I  truft,more  fo  to  others.  In 
the  Afternoon,  preach'd  to  a  vaft  Multitude,  from  Rev.  xxii. 
17.  Jnd  whofeever  will.  Sec,  God  helped  me  to  offer  a  Tefti- 
mony  for  himfclf,  and  to  leave  Sinners  inexcufable  in  negledting 
his  Grace.  I  was  enabled  to  fpcak  with  fuch  Freedom,  Fluen- 
cy, and  Clearnefjj,  as  commanded  the  Attention  of  the  Great. 
V/as  extreamly  tired,  in  the  Evening,  but  enjoyed  Compofure 
and  Sweetnefs. 

Monday,  June  16.  PreacVd  again. ;  and  God  helped  me 
amazingly,  fo  that  this  was  a  fweet  refreftiing  Seafon  to  mySouI 
an:j  others.  Oh,  forever  blefled  be  God  for  Help  afforded  at 
this  Time,  when  my  Body  was  fo  weak,  and  while  there  was 
fo  large  an  Aflembly  to  hear.  Spent  the  Afterjnoon  in  a  com- 
fortable agreable  Manner. 

[  The  next  Day  was  fpent  comfortably. 

On  VVednefday,  he  went  to  a  meeting    of    Minifters    at 

HopewelL 

Thurfday,  Junei(),  See  his  publick  JiParw^?/.  * 
On  Friday  and  Saturday,  he  was  very  much  amifs  ;  but  yet 
preachM  to  his  People  on  Saturday.  His  Illnefs  continued  on 
rheSabbaih;  but  he  preach'd,  notwithftanding,  to  his  People, 
both  Parts  of  the  Day  :  And  after  the  publick  Worfhip  was 
ended,  he  endeavoured  to  apply  divine  Truths  to  the  Cenfcien- 
ces  of  feme,  and  addrefb'd  them  perfonally  for  that  End:  Se- 
veral were  iw Tears,  and  feme  appeared  much  affe£led.  But 
he  was  extremely  wearied  wiih  the  Services  of  the  Day,  and 
was  fo  ill  at  Night,  that  he  could  have  no^bodily  Reft ;  but  re- 
marks, that  Gcd  tuns  his  Support,  and  that  he  was  not  left  defii- 
iute  of  CoTTffort  in  him.  On  Monday,  he  continued  very  111 ;  but 
fpcaks  of  his  Mind's  being  calm  and  compofed,  reiigned  to  the 
diviiK*  Dirpcnlations,  and  content  with  his  feeble  State.  And 
by  the  Account  hcgives  ofhimfelf,  the  remaining  Part  of  this 
Week,  he  continued  very  feebje,and  for  the  molt  Part  dcjedlcd 


*  Trie  pii?. lick  jQurnaJ   that  has   been  fo  often  refer'd  to, 
corcludcs  Vr'jih  ^he  Account  of  ibis  Day. 


<?/ Mr.  David  Bramerd.        A.D.1746.    191 

edinMind,and  enjoy'd  no  great  Freedom  nor  Sweetnefs  in 
fpiritual  Things  ;  excepting  that  for  fome  very  (hort  Spaces  of 
Time  he  had  Refrcfliment  and  Encouragement,  which  engaged 
feis  Heart  on  divine  Things ;  and  fomeiimes  his  Heart  was 
melted  with  fpiritual  AiFedtion.  J 

Lord's- Day,  June  29.  Preach'd,  both  Parts  of  the  Day,from 
"Job,  xiv.  19.  Tet  a  little  while ^  and  the  World  feeth  me  no  morty 
&c.  God  was  pleafed  to  aiTift  me,  to  afford  me  both  Freedom 
and  Power  5  efpecially  towards  theclofe  of  ray  Difcourfesjboth 
Forenoon,  and  Afternoon.  God's  Power  appear'd  in  the  Af- 
fembly,  in  both  Exercifes.  Numbers  of  God's  People  were 
refrefli'd  and  melted  with  divine  Things ;  on©  or  two  comfort- 
ed, who  had  been  long  under  Diftrefs  :  Convidlions,  in  divers 
Inftances,  powerfully  revived  ;  and  one  Man  in  Years  much 
awaken'd,  who  had  not  long  frequented  our  Meeting,  and  ap- 
pear'd before  as  ftupid  as  a  Stock.  God  amazingly  renewed  and 
Jengthen'd  out  my  Strength.  1  was  fo  fpent  at  Noon,  that  i 
could  fcarcewalk,  and  all  my  Joints  trembled  ;  fo  that  I  could 
rot  fit,  nor  fo  much  as  hold  my  Hand  ftill :  And  yet  God 
ftrengthned  me  to  preach  with  Power  in  the  Afternoon  ;  aliho' 
I  had  given  out  Word  to  myPeople,  that  I  did  not  expe£t  to  be 
able  to  do  it.  Spent  fome  Time  afterwards  in  converfing, 
particularly,  with  feveral  Ferfons,  abt>ut  their  fpiritual  State  ; 
and  had  fome  Satisfadtion  concerning  one  or  two.  Pray 'd  af- 
terwards with  a  fick  Child,  and  gave  a  Word  of  Exhortation. 
Was  aflifted  in  all  my  Work.  Bleffed  be  God.  Returned 
home  with  more  Health,  than  I  went  out  with  ;  altho  my  Lin- 
nen  was  wringing  wet  upon  me,  from  a  little  after  ten  in  the 
Morning,  'till  paft  five  in  the  Afternoon.  My  Spirits  alfo  were 
Confiderably  refrefh'd  ;  and  my  Soul  rejoiced  in  Hope,  that  I 
had  through  Grace  done  fomething  for  God.  In  thcEvening, 
walked  out,  and  enjoyed  a  fweet  Seafcn  in  fecret  Praver  and 
Praife.  But  Oh,  I  found  the  Truth  of  the  Pfalmift's  Words, 
My  Goodnefi  extendeih  not  to  Thee  I  I  could  not  make  sny  Re- 
turns to  God  :  1  longed  toHve  only  to  Him, and  to  be  in  Tune 
for  his  Praife  and  Service  forever.  Oh,  for  Spirituality  and 
holy  Fervency,  that  I  might  fpend  and  be /pent  for  God,  to  my 
lateft  Moment  ! 

Monday,  June  30.  Spent  the  Day  in  writing ;  but  under 
much  Weaknefs  and  Diforder.  Felt  the  Labours  of  the  pre- 
ceeding  Day  ;  altho'  my  Spirits  were  fo  refrefh'd  the  Evening 
before,  that  I  was  not  not  then  fenfible  of  my  being  fpent. 

C  c  Tuefday, 


XQ2     ^/.  29:  yi^LIFE 

Tuefday,  yft/y  r»  In  the  Afternoon,  vifitcd,  and  preachM  to 
my  People,  from  Heb,  ix.  27.  on  Occafion  of  feme  Perfons 
lying  at  tb*?  Poiiit  of  Death,  in  my  Congregation.  God  gave 
nie  fomc  AiTiftance  ;  and  his  Word  matie  fome  Imprelfions  on 
the  Audience,  in  general.  This  was  an  agreable  and  com- 
fortable Evening  to  my  Soul :  My  Spirits  were  fomewhat  re- 
♦reih'd  ,  with  a  fmall  Degree  of  Freedom  and  Help  enjoyed  in 
my  Work. 

[  On  Wednefday,  he  went  to  Newark^  to  a  Meeting  of  the 
Prfjhytery  :  Complains  of  lownefs  of  Spirits  5  and  greatly  la- 
ments his  fpending  his  Time  fo  unfruitfully.  The  remaining 
Part  of  the  Week  he  fpent  there,  and  at  Elijaheth-Town  ;  and 
fpeaks  of  Comfort  and  divine  Afliftance,  from  Day  to  Day  : 
But  yet  greatly  complains  for  want  of  more  Spirituality,  j 

Lord's -Day,  July  6.  [  At  Elifaheih-Town  ]  Enjoyed  fome 
Compofure  and  Serenity  of  Mind,  in  the  Morning :  HeardMr. 
Dickinfon  preach,  in  the  Forenoon,  and  was  refrefti'd  wit^  his 
Difcourfe  ;  was  in  a  melting  Frame  ,  fome  Part  of  the  Time 
of  Sermon  :  Partook  of  the  Lord's-Supper,  and  enjoyed  fomd 
t^enfe  of  divine  Things  in  that  Ordinance.  In  the  Afternoon,  I 
preach'd  from  E%ek,  xxxiii.  \i.  As  1  live ^  faith  the  Lord  God^ 
&c.  God  favoured  me  with  Freedom  andFervency  5  and  help- 
ed me  to  plead  his  Caufe,  beyond  my  own  Power. 

Monday,  jfuly  7.  My  Spirits  were  confiderably  rcfrefh*dund 
railed,  in  the  Morning.  There  is  no  Comfort,  I  find,  in  any 
Enjoyment,  without  enjoying  God  and  bein^  engaged  in  his 
Service.  In  the  Evening,  had  the  moft  agreeable  Converfation 
that  ever  I  remember  in  all  my  Life,  upon  God's  being  all  in 
all^  and  all  Enjovments  being  juft  that  torn  which  God  makes 
them,,  and  no  more.  'Tisgood  to  begin  and  end  with  God* 
Oh,  how  does  a  fwect  Solemnity  lay  a  Foundation  for  true 
Pleafure  and  Happinefs  I 

Tuefday,  */2/.V  8.  Rode  hrme,  and  enjoyed  fome  agreeable 
Me(?!taticns  by  the  Way. 

Wednefday,  July  9.  Spent  the  Day  in  writingjCnjoyedfome 
Comfori  and  Refrefhment  of  Spirit  in  my  Evening-Retirement. 

Thurfday,  Ju:y  10.  Spent  moft  of  cheDay  in  writing.  To- 
wards Night,  rode  to  Mr.  Tennent^s  ;  enjoyed  fome  agreeable 
Converfation  :  Went  home,  in  the  Evening,  in  afolemn  f»vect 
Frame  of  Mind  ;  wss  refrefh'd  in  fccret  DutieS;>  longed  toiite 
wholly  and  only  for  God^  and  faw  plainly,  there  was  ^loihiug  ?fi 


i?/Mf.  D4v!d  Braiaerd:    A.D.  174^.     193 

ihe  World  worthy  of  myAfFe£lion  ;  fo  that  my  Heart  was  dead 
to  all  below  ;  yet  not  thro'  Dejedlion  as,  at  fomc  Times,  but 
from  Views  of  a  better  Inheritance*. 

Friday,  July  11 »  Was  in  a  calm  competed  Frame,  in  the 
Morning,  efpecially  in  the  Seafon  of  my  iecret  Retirement  :  I 
thinkjl  was  wellpleafed  with  the  Will  of  Gcd,  whatever  it  was, 
or  fhould  be,  in  all  Refpeds  I  had  then  any  Thought  f.  Inif  nd- 
ing  toadminifter  theLord's-Supper  the  nextLord'sDay,!  lcok*d 
to  God  for  his  Prefence  and  Affiftance  upon  that  Occafion  ;  but 
felt  a  Difpofition  to  fay,  The  Will  of  the  Lord  be  done,  v/hethcr 
it  be  to  give  me  Affiftancc,  or  not.  Spent  foine  little  Titp.e  ui 
writing  :  Vifited  the  Indians^  and  fpent  feme  Time  in  ferious 
CoKverfation  with  them  ;  thinking  it  not  beft  to  preach,  by 
Reafon  that  many  of  them  were  abfent. 

Saturday,  July  12.  This  Day  was  fpent  in  Fading  andPray* 
cr  by  my  Congregation,  as  preparatory  to  the  Sacjapnent,  I 
difcourfed,  both  Parts  of  the  Day,  from  Rom.  iv.  25.  Who  zua.t 
delivered  for  our  Offencei^  &c.  God  gave  me  fome  AfHftance  'wi 
my  Difcourfes,  and  fumething  of  divine  Power  attended  the 
Word  ;  fothat  this  was  an  agreeable  Seafon.  Afterwards  led 
them  to  a  folemn  Renewal  of  theirCovenant,  and  frefiiDedica- 
tion  of  ihemfelves  to  God.  This  was  a  Seafon  both  of  Solemni- 
ty and  Sweetnefs,  and  God  feem*d  to  be  in  the  midji  of  m.  Re- 
turned to  my  Lodgings,  in  theEvening,  in  a  comfortableFrame 
ii£.Mind. 

Lord's-Day,  July  i'^.  In  the  Forenoon,  difcourfed  en  th^ 
l^read  of  Life^  from  Joh.  vi.  35.  God  gaveme  rorneAfTiiiaiice, 
in  Part  of  my  Difcourfe  efpecially;  and  there  appear'd  foinc 
tender  Affedlion  in  the  Affembly  under  divine  Truths  : 
my  Soul  alfo  wasfomewhat  rcfre(h*d.  Adminiftred  the  Sacra- 
ment of  the  Lord's  Supper  to  thirty-one  Perfons  of  the  Indians^ 
God  feem'd  to  be  preient  in  this  Ordinance  ;  the  Communi- 
cants were  fweetly  melted  and  refreih'd,  moft  of  them.  Oh, 
how  they  melted, even  when  theElementswerefirft  uncovered  ! 
There  was  fcarcely  a  dry  Eye  amongft  them,  when  I  took  ofe" 
the  Linnen,  and  fhewed  thcna  the  Symbols  of  Christ's  hrchn 

Body* —  Having  refted  a  little,  after  the  Adminiltration  tf 

the  Sacrament,  I  vifitcd  the  Communicants,  and  found  th?m 
generally  in  a  fvveet  loving  Frame  ;  not  unlike  what  apoearM 
among  them  on  the  former  SacramentalOccaficn,  on  J^prii  ^-7- 
Tn  the  Afternoon,  difcourfed  upon  coming  to  Christ,  and  the 
HatisfaSfionok  thofe  who  do  fo,  from  the  fame^>/^I  indeed  on 
in  the  Forenoon.     This   was  likewifean  agr^^eable  Seafon  j   1 

C  c  2  Seafon 


194    ^/.  29-  ^^^  I-IFE 

Seafon  of  much  Tendernefs,  Affeftion  and  Enlargement  in  di- 
vine Service  :  And  God,  I  am  perfwadedjCrown'd  ourAflembly 
with  his  divine  Prefence.  I  returned  home  much  fpent,  yet 
rejoicing  in  the  Goodnefs  of  God. 

Monday,  July  14.  Went  to  my  People,  and  difcourfed  to 
them  (romP/al.  cxix  106.  2  have  fworn^and  1  will  perform  it  ^Uc» 
Cbferved,  I.  That  all  God's  Judgments  or  Commandments 
Mc  righteous,  1.  That  God's  People  have /zf^rs  io  keep  them  ; 
and  this  they  do  efpecially  at  the  Lord's  Table.  There  appear'd 
to  be  a  powerful  divine  Influence  on  the  Affembly,  and  confi- 
derable  melting  under  the  Word.  Afterwards,  1  led  them  to 
a  Renewal  of  then  Covenant  before  God  (  that  they  would 
watch  over  therrifelves  and  one  another,  left  they  fhould  fall 
into  Sin,  and  diflionour  the  Name  of  Chrift  )  juft  as  I  did  on 
M'^nday  y^/)r/7  28.  This  Tranfadion  was  attended  with  grdat 
Solemnity  :  And  God  feem'd  to  own  it  by  exciting  in  them  a 
Fear  and  Jealoufy  of  themfelves,  left  they  fhould  Sin  againft 
God  ;  fo  that  the  Prefence  of  God  feem'd  to  be  amongft  us  in 
this  Conclufion  of  the  Sacramental  Solemnity. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on  a  Journey  towards  Philadel" 
phia  ;  from  whence  he  did  not  return  'till  Saturday.  He  went 
this  Journey,  and  fpent  the  Week,  under  a  gccat  Degree  of 
lllnefy  of  Body,  and  Dejection  of  Mind.] 

Lord's- Day,  ya>' 20.  Preach'd  twice  to  my  People,  from 
jfch.  xvii.  24.  Father y  J  will  that  they  alfo  whom  thou  haft  given 
mcy  be  ivith  me,  where  1  am^  that  they  may  behold  my  Glory^  which 
then  haft  given  me.  V/as  helped  to  difcourfe  with  great  Clear- 
fiefs  and  Plainr.cfs  in  the  Forenoon.  In  the  Afternoon,  enjoy'd 
fomeTcndernefs,  and  fpake  with  fome  Influence.  Divers  were 
in  Tears  ;  and  lome,  to  Appearance,  in  Dif^refs. 

Monday '/f^/y  21.  Preach'd  to  the  Indians,  chiefly  for  the 
fake  of  fome  Strangers.  Then  propofed  my  Defij^n  of  taking  a 
Journey  fpeeJily  {oSufquahannah  :  ExJiorted  my  People  to  pray 
for  me,  that  God  would  be  with  me  in  thatjourney,  t^c.  Then 
diofe  divers  Perfoi^s  of  the  Congregation  to  travel  with  me. 
Altcrwanls,  rpent  Tirne  in  difcourfing  to  the  Strangers^^ud  was 
foHiewhat  encouraged  with  them.  Took  Care  of  my  People's 
fecular  Bufinefs,  and  was  not  a  little  exercifed  with  it  Had 
fome  Degree  of  Compofure  and  Comfort  in  fecret  Retirement. 
TuefJay,  Ju/y  22.  Was  in  a  dejected  Frame,  moft  of  the 
Day:  Wanted  to  v/ear  out  Life, and  have  it  at  anEnd  ;  but  had 
(cmc  Deilres  of //'i;/>;p'^^  GoD,and  wearing  out  Life  for  him.  Ob 
thdi  I  could  indeed  do  fo  ! 

[Th« 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 746,     195 

[The  nextDay,  he  went  to  Elijah eth-T: own ^  to  a  Meeting  of 
the  Prejbytery  ;  and  fpent  this,  and  Thurfday,  and  the  former 
Part  of  Friday,  under  a  very  great  Degree  of  Melancholy,  and 
exceedingGloominefs  of  Mind  ;  not  through  anyFear  of  future 
Punifhment,  but  as  being  diftrelTed  with  a  Scnfelefnefs  of  all 
Good,  fo  that  the  whole  World  appeared  empty  and  gloomy  to 
him.  But,  in  the  latter  Part  of  Friday,  he  was  greatly  relieved 
and  comforted.] 

Saturday,  ^uly  26.  Was  comfor.table  in  the  Morning  ;  my 
Countenance  and  Heart  were  not  fad,  as  in  Days  paft  ;  enjoy'd 
fome  Sweetnefs  in  lifting  up  my  Heart  toGod.  Rode  Home  to 
my  People,  and  was  in  a  comfortable  pleafant  P'rame  by  the 
Way;  my  Spirits  were  much  relieved  of  their  Burden,  and  I 
felt  free  to  go  through  all  DifHculties  and  Labours  in  my  Ma- 
fter's  Service. 

LordVDay,  July  27.  Difcourfed  to  my  People, in  theFore- 
noon,  from  Luke  xii.  37.  on  the  Duty  and  Benefit  of  watch- 
ing :  God  helped  me  in  the  latter  Part  of  my  Difcourfe,  and 
the  Power  of  God  appeared  in  the  AfTembly.  In  the  Afternoon, 
difcourfed  from  Luke  xiii.  25.  Here  alfo  I  enjoyed  fome  Aflift- 
ance,  and  the  Spirit  of  God  feemed  to  attend  what  was  fpoken, 
fo  that  there  was  a  great  Solemnity,  and  fome  Tears  among 7«- 
dians  and  others. 

Monday,  July  28.  Was  very  weak,  and  fcarce  able  to  per- 
form any  Bufinefs  at  all ;  but  enjoyed  Sweetnefs  and  Comfort  in 
Prayer,  both  Morning  and  Evening  ;  and  was  compofcd  and 
comfortable  thro*  the  Day  :  My  Mind  was  intenfe,  and  my 
Heart  fervent,  at  leatt  in  fome  Degree,  in  fecret  Duties  ;  and 
I  longed  {o  Jpend  and  be  fpent  for  God. 

Tuefday,  July  2g.  My  Mind  was  chearful,  and  free  from 
thofe  melancholy  Damps,  that  I  am  often  excrcifed  with  :  Had 
Freedom  in  looking  up  to  God,  at  fundry  Times  in  the  Day. 
In  the  Evening,  I  enjoyed  a  comfortable  Se.ifan  in  fecretPrayer ; 
was  helped  to  plead  with  God  for  my  own  dear  People,  that  he 
would  carry  on  his  own  blefledWork  among  them  j  wasaHifled 
^Ifo  in  praying  for  the  divinePrefencc  to  attend  me  in  my  intend- 
ed Journey  to  Sujquahannah  ;  was  alfo  helped  to  remember 
dear  Brethren  and  Friends  in  New- England  :  fcarce  knew  how 
to  leave  the  Throne  of  Grace,  and  it  grieved  me  that  i  was 
obliged  to  go  to  Bed  \  I  longed  to  do  fomething  for  God,  but 
knew  not  how.  BicfTed  be  God  for  this  Freedom  from  De- 
jedxion, 

Wednefday, 


ig6      JEl  29:  ««   LIFE 

Wcdnefday,  j^u^y  30.  Was  uncommonly  comfortable,both 
in  Body  and  Mind  ;  in  the  Forenoon  efpecially  :  My  Mind  was 
folemn,  I  was  aflifted  in  my  Work,  and  God  feem'd  to  be  near 
to  me  ;  (o  that  the  Day  was  as  comfortable  as  moft  I  have  en- 
joyed for  fome  Time.  In  the  Evening,  was  favoured  with 
Afliftance  in  fecret  Prayer,  and  felt  much  as  I  did  the  Evening 
before.  Blefled  be  God  for  that  Freedom  I  then  enjoyed  at  the 
Throne  of  Grace,  for  my  felf,  my  People  and  my  dear  Friends, 
//  is  good  for  me  to  draw  near  to  God, 

[  He  feems  to  have  continued  very  much  in  the  fame  free, 
comfortable  State  of  Mind  the  next  Day.] 

Friday,  Auguft  i.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  a  fweet  Seafon 
in  fecret  Prayer  5  Clouds  of  Darknefs  and  perplexing  Care 
were  fweetly  fcatter'd,  and  nothing  anxious  remained.  Ob, 
how  ferene  was  my  Mind  at  this  Seafon  1  How  free  from  that 
diftra£ling  Concern  I  have  often  felt  !  77;y  Willie  done^  was  a 
Petition  fweet  to  my  Soul  ;  and  if  God  had  bidden  me  chufe 
for  my  felf  in  any  Affair  ;  I  fhould  have  chofen  rather  to  have 
refer'd  the  Choice  to  him  ;  for  I  faw  he  was  infinitely  wife, 
?nd  could  not  do  anyThing  amifs,  as  I  was  in  Danger  of  doing. 
Was  afTifted  in  Prayer,  for  my  dear  Flock, that  God  would  pro- 
mote his  own  Work  among  themj  and  that  God  would  go  with 
me  in  my  intended  Journey  to  Sufquahannah  ;  was  helped  to 
remember  dear  Friends  in  New-England^  and  my  dear  Brethren 
in  the  Miniftry.  1  found  enough  in  the  fweet  Duty  of  Prayer  to 
fcave  engaged  me  to  continue  in  it  the  whole  Night,  would  my 
bjdily  State  have  admitted  of  it.  Oh,  how  fweet  it  is,  to  be 
enabled  heartily  to  fay,  Lord^hot  my  Will,  but  thine  be  done  / 

Saturday,  Jug.  2.  Near  Night,  preach'd  (romMattb.  xi.  29. 
Was  ccnfiderably  helped  ;  ai^i  the  Prefence  of  God  feem'd  to 
befomewhat  remarkably  in  the  Aflembly  ;  divine  Truths  made 
powerful  ImpreiTions,  both  upon  Saints  and  Sinners.  Bleffed 
be  God  for  fuch  a  Revival  among  us.  In  the  Evening,  was 
very  weary,  but  found  my  Spirits  fupportcd  and  refrefli'd. 

Lord's- Day,  Jug.  3.  Difcourfcd  to  my  People,  in  the  Fore- 
noon, from  Cfilof  iii.  4.  Obferved,  that  Chri/i  is  the  Believer's 
Life.  God  helped  me,  and  gave  me  his  Prefence  in  this  Dif- 
courfe  ;  and  it  was  a  Seafon  of  confiderable  Power  In  theAflem- 
bly.  In  the  Afternoon,  preach'd  from  Lukexix  41,  42.  I  en- 
joyed fonie  Aflifhnce  ;  tho*  not  (o  much  as  in  the  Forenoon. 
In  the  Evening,  I  enjoyed  Freedgm  and  Sweetnefs  in   fecret 

Prayer  j 


of  Mr\  David  Brainerd:    A.D.  x  746.     197^ 

Prayer;  God  enlarged  my  Heart,  freed  me  from  melancholy 
Damps,  and  gave  me  Satisfa6lion  in  drawing  near  to  himfelf. 
Oh  that  my  Soul  could  magnify  the  Lord,  for  thefe  Seafons  of 
Compofure  and  Rclignation  to  his  Will. 

Monday,  Jug»  4,  Spent  the  Day  in  writing  ;  enjoyed  mach 
Freedom  and  Affiftance  in  my  Work  :  Was  in  a  compofed  and 
comfortableFrame,moft  of  the  Day  ;  and  in  theEvening  enjoy- 
ed fome  Sweetnefs  in  Prayer.  BlefTed  be  ^od,mySpirits  were 
yet  up,  and  I  was  free  from  fmkin?  Damps ;  as  I  have  been  ia 
general  ever  fince  I  came  from  EUfabeth-l^iun  laft.  Oh  what  a 
Mercy  is   this  I 

Friday,  ^«f .  5.  Towards  Night,  preach'd  at  the  Funeral 
of  one  of  my  Chriftians,  from  Jfai.  Ivii.  2.  Was  opprefTed  with 
the  nervous  Head-Ach,  and  confiderably  dejeded  :  However, 
had  a  little  Freedom,  fome  Part  of  the  Time  I  was  difcouriing. 
Wascxtreamly  weary  in  the  Evening;  but  notwithfianding 
enjoyed  fome  Liberty  and  Chearfalnefs  of  Mind  in  Prayer  -,  and 
found  the  Dejection  that  I  feared j much  removed,  and  mySpiriu^ 
confiderably  refrefh'd. 

[  He  continued  in  a  very  comfortable  chcarful  Frame  of 
Mind  the  next  Day,  with  his  Heart  enlarged  in  the  Service  of 
God.] 

Thurfday,  Aug.  7.  Rode  to  my  HoufejWhere  I  fpent  the  lad 
Winter,  in  order  to  bring  fome  Things  I  needed  for  my  Sufqua- 
bannab  Journey  :  Was  refreih'd  to  fee  that  Place, which  God  fvi 
marvelloufly  vifited  with  the  Showers  of  his  Grace.  Oh  how 
amazingly.did  the  Power  i/  God  pften  appear  there !  Bk/^  the 
Lord,  O  my  Soul^  and  forget  not  all  his  Benefits, 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fpeaks  of  Liberty,  Enlargement,  and 
Sweetnefs  of  Mind,  in  Prayer  and  religious  ConverfatiCn.J 

Saturday,  Aug.  9.  In  the  Afternoon,  vifited  my  People  ;  (zt 
their  Affairs  in  Order,  as  mach  as  pofTible,  and  contrived  for 
them  theManagement  of  their  worldly  Bufinefs :  Difcourfed  tq 
them  in  a  folcmn  Manner,  and  concluded  with  Prayer.  Was 
compofed,  and  comfortable  in  theEvening,  and  fomewfcat  hi- 
vent  in  fecret  Prayer  :  Had  fome  Senfe  and  View  of  the  eternal 
World,and  found  a  Serenity  of  Mind.  Ob  tliat  I  could  magnify 
the  Lord  for  any  Freedom  he  affords  me  in  Prayer,. 

Lord*s-Day,  Au^.  10.  Difcourfed  to  my  People,  both  P^rts 
01  the  Day,  from  ASfs  iii.  15.     In  difcourfing  o[  ReiKraams,  m 

thxC 


1^8      ^V.  29.  y.&^LIFE 

the  Forenoon,God  helped  me,  fo  that  roy  Difcourfe  was  fearch- 
ing,  fome  were  in  Tears,  both  of  the  Indians  and  white  People  j 
and  the  Word  of  God  was  attended  with  fome  Power,  In  the 
Intcrmiffion-Seafon,  I  was  engaged  in  difcourfing  to  fome  in  or- 
der to  their  Eaptifm  ;  as  well  as  with  One  who  had  then  lately 
met  with  fome  Comfort,  after  fpiritual  Trouble  and  Diflrefs.  la 
the  Afternoon,  was  fomewhat  affifled  again,  tho'  weak  and 
weary.  Afterwards  baptized  6  Perfons ;  3  Adults,  and  3  Chil- 
dren. Was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  in  the  Evening,  and  en- 
joyed fome  Satisfa6ti(Wi  in  fecret  Prayer.  I  fcarce  ever  in  my 
Life  felt  my  itM  fo  full  of  Tendernefs,  as  this  Day. 

Monday,  Jug.  1 1.  Being  about    to  kt  out   on  a  Journey  to 
Sufquahannah  the  next  Day,   with  Leave  of  Providence,  I  fpent 
fome  Time  this  Day  in  Prayer  with  my  People,  thatGod  would, 
blefs  and  fucceed  my  intended  Journey,  that  he  would  fend  forth 
his  blefTed  Spirit  with  his  Word,  and  fet  up  his  Kingdom  among 
the  poor  Indians  in  the  Wildernefs.     While  I  was  opening  and 
applying  Part  of  the  cxth  &  iid/yj/wj,the  Power  of  God  kem'd 
to  defcend  on  the  AfTembly  in  fome  Meafure  ;  and   while  I  was 
making  the  firft  Prayer,  Numbers   were  melted,  and  I  found 
fome  afFedlionateEnlargementof  Soul  my  felf.  Preach'd  IxomASfs 
iv.  31.  God  helped  me,  and  my  Interpreter  alfo  :  There  was  a 
(baking  and  melting  among  us ;  and  divers,  1  doubt  not,were  ia 
fome  Meafure  filled  with   the  Holy  Gho/i,      Afterwards,  Mr. 
Mc  Knight     pray'd  :   I  then  open'd  the  two  laft  Stanza's  of  the 
Ixxiid  Pfalm  ;  at  which  Time  God  was  prefent  with  us ;  efpe- 
cially  while  I  infifted  upon  theProm.ife  of  ali  Nations  blefftng  the 
great  Redeemer  :   My   Soul   was  refrefh'd,  to  think,    that 
this  Day,  this  blefTed  glorious  Seafon,  (hould  furely  come  ;  and 
I  trufl.  Numbers  of  my  dear  People  were  alfo  refrefh'd.    After- 
wards pray'd  ;   had  fome  Freedom, but  was  almofl  Spent : Th€n 
walk'd  out,  and  left  my  People  to  carry  on  religious  Exeroifes 
among  themfelves  :  They  pray'd  repeatedly, and  fung,  while  I 
refted  and  refrcfh'd  my  feif.     Afterwards,  went  to  theMeeting; 
pray'd  with,    and  difmife'd   the  AfTembly.     BlefTed  be  God, 
this  has  been  a  Day  of  Grace.     There  were  many  Tears  and 
afTec^ionate  Sobs   among   us  this  Day.     In  the  Evening,  my 
Soul  was  refrefh'd  in  Prayer  :   Enjoyed  Liberty  at  the  Throne 
of  Grace,  in  praying  for  my  People  and  Friends  and  CheChurch 
of  God  in  general.     Blefi  the  Lord^  Omy  Soul. 

[  The  next  Day,  he  fet  out  on   his  Journey  towards  Sufqua* 
bannah^  and  fix  of  his  Chrifiian  Indians  with  him,  whom  he  had 

cbofca 


^/MK  David  Bralnerd.    A.D.  Ty^G.     199 

chofen  out  of  his  Congregation,a§  thofe  that  he  judged  moft  fit 
to  affift  him  in  the  Bufinefs  he  was  going  upon.  He  took  his 
Way  through  Philadelphia  ;  intending  tago  to  Sufquahamafj^ 
River,  fardownalong,whereitis  fettled  by  the  white  People, 
below  the  Country  inhabited  by  the  Indiam  ;  and  fo  to  travel 
up  the  River  to  the  Indian  Habitations  :  For  altho'  this  was 
much  further  about,yet  hereby  he  avoiacJ  the  hugeMountains 
and  hideousWildernefspthat  muft  be  crofs'd  m  the  nearerWay  • 
which  in  Time  paft  he  had  found  to  be  extreamly  difficultand 
fatiguing.  He  rode  this  Week  as  far  as  Char  left  own  y  a  f^lacc 
of  thatName  about  30  Miles  Weft  ward  of  Philadelphia ;  where 
he  arrived  on  Friday  :  And  in  his  Way  hither,  was  for  the 
moft  Part  in  a  compofed  comfortable  State  of  Mind.] 

Saturday,  Jug»  16.  [At  Chat  le/? own  ]  It  being  a  Day  kept 
by  thePcople  of  the  Place  where  I  now  was,  as  preparatory  to 
the  ^Celebration  of  the  Lord's-Supper,  I  tarried  ;  heard  Mr. 
Treat  preach  ;  and  then  preach'd,  my  felf.  God  gave  me  Tome 
good  Degree  of  Freedom,  and  helped  me  to  difcourfe  with 
Warmth,  and  Application  to  the  Confcience*  Afterwards, 
I  was  refrcfh'd  in  Spirit,  tho'  much  tired  ;  and  fpent  the  Even- 
ing agreably5having  fomeFreedom  inPfayer,a3  well  asChriftian 
Converfation. 

^  LordVDay,  Jug,  17.  Enjoyed  Liberty,  Compofure^and  Sa* 
tisfadion,  io  the  fecret  Duties  of  the  Morning  :  Had  myHeart 
fomewhat  enlarged  in  Prayer  for  dearFriends,as  well  as  for  my 
felf.  In  the  Forenoon,  attended  Mr,  Treat's  Preaching,  par- 
took of  the  Lord's-Supper,  five  of  my  People  alfo  communi- 
cating in  this  holy  Ordinance  :  I  enjoyed  feme  Enlargement 
andOut-going  of  Soul  in  thisSeafon.  In  theAfternoon,preacb'd 
from  Ezek.  xxxiii.  11.  Enjoyed  not  fo  much  fenfibleAlTiftance 
as  the  Day  before  ;  however,  vv-as  helped  tofome  Fervency  in 
addreffing  immortal  Souls.  Was  fomewhat  confounded  in  the 
Evening,  becaufe  I  thought  I  had  done  little  or  nothing  for 
God;  yet  enjoyed  fome  Refrefhment  of  Spirit  in  Chiiftian 
Converfation  and  Prayer.  Spent  the  Evening,  'till  near  mid- 
night, in  religious  Exercifes  ;  and  found  my  bodily  Strength, 
which  was  much  fpent  when  I  came  from  the  publickWorfhip, 
fomething  renewed  before  I  went  to  Bed. 

Monday,  Jug.  18.  Rode  on  my  Way  tov/ards  Paxicn,  upon 
Sufquabannah'River.  Felt  my  Spirits  fink,  towards  Night,  fo 
that  I  had  little  Comfort. 

D  d  Tuefday, 


aoo     yE/.  29.  ^Tif^  LIFE 

Tuefday, -^«^.  19.  Rode  forward  ftlll  ;  and  at  Night  lodged 
by  theSide  of  Sufquahannah.  Was  weak  and  diforder'd,  both 
this  and  vhe  preceedingDay,and  found  my  Spirit?:  confiderably 
damp*d,  meeting  with  none  that  I  thought  godiy  People. 

Wednelday,  Aug.  20.  flaving  lain  ina  cold  fweat  allNighf, 
I  coughMmuch  bloodv  Matter  this  Morning,  and  was  under 
great  Diforder  of  BocW  a"'^  ^^^  a  ^'ftle  ;/le]ancho]y ;  but 
what  gave  me  ^<^^^  Encouragement,  was,  I  had  a  fecrei  Hope 
that  I  mi^^it  fpeedily  get  a  Difmiffion  from  Eanh  and  all  it's 
Toi/s  and  Sorrows.  Rode  this  Day  to  one  Chambers's^  upon 
Sujquahannoh^  and  there  lodged.  Was  much  affliaed,  in  the 
Evening,wlih  an  ungodly  Crew,  drinking,  fwearing,  k^c.  Oh, 
what  a  Hell  it  would  be,  to  be  numbered  with  the  Vngof.ly  f 
Enjoyed  fome  agreable  Converfation  with  a  Traveller,  who 
fecm*d  to  have  fome  Relilh  of  true  Religion. 

Thurfday,  Jug.  21.  Rode  up  the  River  about  15  Miles,  and 
there  lodged,  in  a  Family  that  appeared  quite  deftitute  of  God. 
Laboured  to  difcourfe  with  the  Man  about  the  Life  of  Religion, 
but^  found  him  very  artful  in  evading  fuch  Converfation. 
OhjWhat  a  Death  It  is  to  fome,  to  hear  of  the  Things  of  God  i 
Was  out  of  my  Element  ,  but  was  not  fo  dejcded  as  at  fome 
Times. 

Friday,  Jug.  12.  Continued  my  Couifcup  the  River  ;  my 
People  now  being  with  me,  who  before  were  parted  from  me  : 
Travelled  above  all  the  Engli/h  Settlements ;  at  Night,  lodged 
in  the  open  Woods ;  and  flept  with  m.ore  Comfort,  than  while 
among  an  ungodly  Company  of  white  People.  Enjoyed  fome 
Liberty  in  fecret  Prayer,  this  Evening ;  and  was  helped  to  re- 
member dear  FrienGs,as  well  as  my  dear  Fiock,and  theChurch 
of  God  in  general. 

Saturday,  Jug.  23.  Arrived  at  the  hdian  Town,  called 
Shaumoktng,  near  Night.  Was  not  fo  dejefled  as  formerly  ; 
but  yet  fomewhat  exercifed.  Felt  fomewhat  ccmpofed  in  the 
Evtning  ;  enjoyed  fomeFreedom  in  leaving  my  JU  withGoD  : 
Thro'  the  great  Gcodnefs  of  God,  I  enjoyed  fome  Liberty  of 
Mind;  was  ngt  diftrefs'd  with  a  Defpondency,  as  frequently 
heretofore. 

Lord's- Day,  Jug.  24.  Towards  Noon,  vifited  fome  of  the 
Delawaresy  and  difcourfed  with  them  about  Chriftianity.  In 
the  Afternoon,  difcourfed  to  the  King,znd  others,  upon  divine 
Things ;  who  feem'd  difpofed  to  hear.  Spent  moft  of  the  Day 
in  thefe  Exercifes.  In  the  Evening,  enjoyed  fome  Comfort 
and  Sa^sfaaian  y  and  cfpecially  had  fome  Swectnefs  in  fecret 

Prayer : 


ef  ilfr,  David  Brainerd.    A.D.  1746.     201 

Prayer  :  This  Duty  was  made  fo  agreable  to  me,  that  I  loved 
to  7.  ilk  abroad  and  repeatedly  engage  in  it.  Oh^  how  comfor- 
table  >  a  liftle  Glimpfe  of  God  ! 

Monciijy.  Au^.  25.  Spent  molt  of  the  Day  in  writing.  Sent 
out  my  Pev^ple  that  were  with  me,  to  talk  with  the  Indiam,zi\d 
contr?6t  a  Friendftiip  and  Familiarity  with  them,  that  I  might 
have  a  better  Opportunity  of  treating  wi(h  them  about  Chrif- 
tianity.  SomeGood  feem'd  to  be  done  by  their  Vifits  this  Day, 
divftTfi  pppear'd  wilh'ng  to  hearken  to  Chriftianity.  My  Spirits 
werea  litUe  refre{h*d,this  Evening  ;  and  I  found  fome  Liberty 
and  5atisfa<5tiQn,  in  Prayer. 

Tuefday,  Jug.  26.  About  Noon,dircourfed  to  a  confidera- 
ble  Number  of  Indians  :  God  help*d  me,  I  am  perfwaded  ;  I 
was  enabled  to  fpeak  v/ith  much  Plainnefs,  and  fome  Warmth 
and  Power.  The  Di/coutie  had  Imprefiion  upon  fome,  and 
made  them  appear  very  ferious.  I  thought,  Things  now  ap- 
pear'd  as  encouraging^as  they  did  at  Crojweeks.  At  the  Time 
of  my  firft  V^ifit  to  thofe  Indians.  I  was  a  little  encouraged  : 
I  preiTed  Things  with  all  my  Might ;  and  calTd  out  my  Peo- 
ple, who  were  then  prefent,  to  give  in  their  Te/iimony  for 
God  5  which  they  did.  Towards  Night,  was  reftefli'd  ; 
felt  a  Heart  to  pray  for  thefetting  upofGod*s  Kingdom  here  ; 
as  well  as  for  my  dearCongrcgation  below,  and  my  dearPViends 
elfewhere. 

Wednefday,  Jug.  27.  There  having  been  a  thick  Smoak, 
in  the  Houfe  where  I  lodged,  all  Night  before,  v/hereby  I  was 
almoft choked,  I  was  this  Morning  difirefs'd  with  Pains  in  my 
Head  and  Neck,  and  could  have  no  Reft.  In  ihs  Aborning,  the 
Smoak  was  ftill  the  fame  ;  and  a  cold  eafterly  Storm  gathering, 
I  could  neither  live  within  Doors  nor  without,  any  long  Time 
together  ;  I  was  pierced  with  the  Rawnefs  of  the  Air  abroad, 
in  the  Houfe  diftrefs'el  with  the  Smoak.  I  was  this  Day  very 
vapoury,  and  lived  in  greatDiftrefs,and  had  not  Health  enough 
to  do  any  Thing  to  any  Purpofe. 

Thurfday,  Jug,  28.  In  the  Forenoon,  was  under  great 
Concern  of  Mind  about  my  Work.  Was  vifited  by  fome  who 
defired  to  hear  me  preach ;  difcourfed  to  'em,  in  the  After- 
nooxij  with  fome  Fervency,  and  laboured  to  perfwade  'em  to 
turn  to  God,  Was  full  of  Concern  for  the  Kingdom  of  Chrift, 
and  found  fome  Enlargement  of  Soul  in  Prayer,  both  in  fecret 
and  in  myFamily.  Scarcely  ever  faw  moreclearlyjthan  thisDay, 
that  'tis  God's  fi^ark  to  convert  Souls,  and  efpecially  poor 
Heathsm  i  Iknew,  I  could  not  touch  them;  I  faw,  1  could 
D  i  2  only 


.^,.  .9. 


Hit?^  Lilt'  E 


only  fpeak  to  dry  Bones^  but  could  give  them  no  Senfe  of  what 
I  faid.  My  Eyes  were  up  to  God  for  Help  :  I  could  fay, 
the  Work  was  his  j  and  if  done,  the  Glory  would  be  his, 

Friday,  Aug*  29.  Felt  the  fame  Concern  of  Mind,  as  the 
Day  before.  Enjoyed  fome  Freedom  in  Prayer,  and  a  Satis- 
faction to  leave  all  with  God.  Travelled  to  the  Delawares, 
found  few  at  home :  Felt  poorly,  but  was  able  to  fpend  fome 
Time  alone  in  readingGod'sWord  &  i n Pr ay er,S: enjoyed  fome 
Sweetncfs  in  thefe  Exercifes.  In  the  Evening,  was  ailifted  re- 
peatedly in  Prayer,  and  found  fome  Comfort  in  coming  to  the 
Throne  of  Grace. 

Saturday,  yf^/^-.  30.  Spent  theForenoon  in  vifiting  aTr^^^r, 
that  came  down  the  Kwti  ftck  ;  who  appeared  as  ignorant  as 
any  Indian,  In  the  Afternoon,  fpent  fome  Time  in  Writings 
Reading  and  Prayer. 

Lord's* Day,  Aug.  31.  Spent  much  TIme,in  theMorning, 
in  fecret  Duties  :  Found  a  Weight  upon  my  Spirits,  and  could 
not  but  cry  to  God  with  Concern  and  Engagement  of  Soul. 
Spent  fome  Time  alfo  in  reading  and  expounding  God's  Word 
to  my  dear  Family,  that  was  with  me, as  well  as  in  Singing  and 
Prayer  with  them.  Afterwards,  fpake  the  Word  of  God,  to 
fome  few  of  the  Sufquahannah- Indians.  In  the  Afternoon,  felt 
very  weak  and  feeble^  Near  Night,  was  fomething  refrefli'd 
in  Mind,  with  fome  Views  of  Things  relating  to  my  great 
Work.  Oh,  how  heavy  is  my  Work,  v/hen  Faith  can't  take 
hold  of  an  Aimighty  Arwy  for  the  Performance  of  it !  Many 
Times  have  1  been  ready  to  fmk  in  this  Cafe.  BleiTcd  be  God, 
that  I  may  repair  to  a  full  Fountain, 

Monday,  September  i.  Set  out  on  ajourney  towards  a  Place 
called  The  great  Iflund,  about  50  M\\t5^\iHx\K.itomShaumoking^ 
in  the  North- weltern  Branch  of  Sufquahannah,  Travelled  fome 
Part  of  the  Way,  and  at  Night  lodg'd  in  the  Woods.  Was 
exceeding  feeble, thisDay, and  fweat  much  the  Night  following, 
Tuefday,  Sept.  2.  Rode  forward  j  but  no  rafter  than  my 
People  went  on  Foot.  Was  very  weak,  on  this,  as  well  as  the 
prccccdingDays  :  Was  fo  feeble  and  iaint,that  1  fear'd  it  would 
kill  mc  to  lie  out  in  the  open  Air  ;  And  fome  of  ourCompany 
bein^  parted  from  u$,  fo  liiat  we  had  now  no  Ax  with  us,  I'had 
no  Way  but  to  climb  into  a  young  Pine-Tree,  and  with  my 
Knife  to  lop  ihc  Branches, and  lo  made  a  Shelter  from  theDew. 
But  the  Evening  he\ng  cloudy  and  very  likety  for  Rain,  I  was 
ftill  under  Fc•a^'^  of  being  extremely  expofed  :  Sweat  muoh  in 
^hc;  flight,  (0  ih.u  rny    i.inctt  was  almoft  wringing  wet  all 

Nishf, 


of  Mr,  David  Braint^d.       A.D.i  74^.    203 

Night.  I  fcarce  ever  vpas  more  weak  and  weary,  than  this 
Evening,  when  I  was  able  to  fit  up  at  all.  This  was  a  melan- 
choly Situation  I  was  in  ;  but  I  endeavoured  to  quiet  ray  felf 
withConfiderations  of  the  Poflibility  of  my  being  in  much  worfc 
Circumftances,  amongft  Enemies,  ^c, 

Wednefday,  ^ept,  3.  Rode  to  the  Delaware-Tovjn  ;  found 
divers  drinking  and  drunken.  Difcourfed  with  fome  of  the 
Indians  about  Chriftianity  ;  obferved  my  Interpreter  m^ich  en- 
gaged and  affifted  in  his  Work  :  Some  few  Perfons  feem'd  to 
hear  with  great  Earneftnefs  and  Engagement  of  Soul.  About 
Noon,  rode  to  a  fmall  Town  oi  Shauwaunoes,  about  8  Miles 
diftant ;  fpent  an  Hour  or  two  there,  and  returned  to  thcDela^ 
urare-Town,  and  lodged  there.  Was  fcarce  ever  more  con- 
founded with  a  Senfe  of  my  own  Unfruitfulnefs  and  Unfitnefs 
for  my  Work,  than  now.  Oh,  what  a  dead,  heartlefs,barren, 
unprofitable  Wretch  did  I  now  fee  my  kU  to  be  !  My  Spirits 
were  fo  low,  and  my  bodily  Strength  fo  wafted,  that  I  could 
do  nothing  at  all.  At  Length,  being  much  overdone.  Jay 
down  on  a  Buffalo-Skin  ;  but  fv/eat  much,  the  whole  Night. 

Thurfday,  Sept.  4.  Difcourfed  with  the  Indians,  in  the 
Morning,  about  Chriftianity  ;  my  Interpreter ^  afterv/ards, car- 
rying on  the  Difcourfe,  to  a  confiderable  Length  :  Some  few 
appeared  well-difpofed,  and  fomewhat  affe6ted.  Left  thisPIace, 
and  returned  towards  Shaumoking  ;  and  at  Night  lodged  in  the 
Place  where^I  lodged  the  Monday-Night  before  :  Was  in  very 
uncomfortable  Circumftances  in  the  Evening, my  People  beincr 
belated,  and  not  coming  to  me  'till  paft  10  at  Night ;  {q  tha^t 
I  had  no  Fire  to  drefs  any  Vi6Vuals,  or  to  keep  me  Warm_,  or 
keep  cfF  wild  Beafts  ;  and  I  was  fcarce  ever  more  weak  and 
worn  out  in  all  my  Life.  However,  I  lay  down  and  llept  be- 
fore my  People  came  up,  expelling  Nothing  eife  but  to  fpend 
the  whole  Night  alone  and  without  Fire. 

Friday,  Sept.  5.  Was  exceeding  weak,fo  that  I  could  fcarce- 
ly  ride  ;  it  feem'd  fometimes  as  if  I  muft  fall  oiFfrom  myHorfe, 
and  lie  in  the  open  Woods :  However,  got  to  Shaumoking^ 
tcwards  Night :  Felt  fomethingofa  Spirit  of  Thankfulncls, 
that  God  had  fo  far  return'd  mc  :  Was  refrefh'd,  to  fee  ons 
of  my  Chriftians,  whom  I  left  here  in  my  late  Excurfion. 

Saturday,  Sept*  6.  Spent  the  Day  in  a  very  weak  State  5 
Coughing  and  fpitting  Blood,  and  having  little  Appetite  to  any 
Food  I  had  with  me  :  Was  able  to  do  very  little,  except 
Ciifcouife  a  while  of  divine  Things  to  my  own  People,  and  to 
ibaie  few  I  met  with.     Had,  by  this  Time,  vzry  little  Life  or 

Heart 


'204  ^t,  29:  r^5  L  I  F  E 

Heart  to  fpeak  for  God,  thro'  Feeblenefs  of  Body,  and  Flatnefa 
of  Spirits.  Was  fcarcely  ever  more  alhamed  and  confound  eel 
in  my  (cM^  than  now-  I  was  fenfible,  that  there  wereNum- 
bers  of  God's  People,  who  knew  I  was  then  out  apon  a  Defign 
(or  at  leaft  the  Pretence)  or  doing  fomething  for  God,  and  in 
bis  Caufe,  among  the  poor  Indians  ;  and  they  were  ready  to 
fuppofe,  that  I  was  fervent  in  Spirit  :  But  Oh,  the  heartlefs 
Frame  of  Mind  that  I  felt,  fill'd  me  with  Confufion  I  Oh 
(methought)  if  God's  People  knew  me,  as  God  knows,  they 
would  not  think  fo  highly  of  my  Zeal  and  Refolution  for 
God,  as  perhaps  now  they  do  !  I  could  not  but  defire  they 
(hould  fee  how  heartlefs  and  irrefolute  I  was,  that  they  might 
be  undeceived,  and  not  think  'of  me  above  what  they  ought  to 
think.  And  yet  I  thought,  if  they  faw  the  utmoflof  myFlat- 
nefs  and  Unfaithfulnefs,  the  Smallnefs  of  my  Courage  andRe- 
folution  for  God,  they  would  be  ready  to  fhut  me  out  of  their 
Doors, as  unworthy  of  theCompany  orFriendfhipof  Chriftians. 

Lord's- Day,  Sept. 'j^  Was  much  in  the  fame  weak  State  of 
Body,  and  afflifted  Frame  of  Mind,  as  in  the  preceedingDay: 
My  Soul  was  grieved,  and  mourn'd,  that  I  could  do  nothing 
for  God.  Read  and  expounded  fome  Part  of  God's  Word  to 
my  own  dear  Family,  and  fpent  fome  Time  in  Prayer  with 
Ihem  ;  difcourfed  alfo  a  little  to  i\\Q  Pagans :  But  fpent  the 
Sabbath  with  little  Comfort. 

Monday,  Sept,  8.  Spent  the  Forenon  among  the  Indians  ; 
in  the  Afternoon,  left  Shaumoking,  and  returned  down  the 
River,  a  few  Miles.  Had  propofed  to  have  tarried  a  confide- 
rable  Time  longer  among  the  Indians  upon  Sufquahannah^  but 
was  hindred  from  purfuing  my  Purpofe  by  the  Sicknefs  that 
prevailed  there,  the  weakly  Circumftances  of  my  own  PeopFe 
that  were  with  me,  &  efpecially  my  own  extraordinary  Weak- 
nefs,  having  been  exercifed  wir^^  great  noilurnal  Sweats,  and 
a  coughing  up  of  Blood,  in  almoft  the  whole  of  the  Journey  ; 
and  was  a  great  Part  of  the  Time  fo  feeble  and  faint,  that  it 
leem'd  as  tho'  I  never  (hould  be  able  to  reach  home  ;  and  at 
the  fameTime  very  deftitute  of  thpComforts&  evenNeceflarief 
ofLife  ;  at  leaft, what  was  neceflary  for  one  in  fo  weak  aState. 
In  this  Journey  [  fometimes  was  enabled  to  fpeak  the  Word  of 
God  WJth  fome  Power,  and  divine  Truths  made  fome  Impref* 
fions  on  divers  that  heard  me  ;  fo  that  feveral,  both  Men  and 
Wcmcn,  old  and  young,  fcem'd  to  cleave  to  us^  and  be  well 
difpofcd  towards  Chri/fianity  ;  but  others  mocked  and  flouted, 
which  damp'd  thofe  who  before  feem'd  friendly,  at  leaft  fome 

of 


fffMr»  David  Bramerd.    A.D.  174^;     205 

of  them  :  Yet  God,  at  'times,  was  evidently  prefent,  affifting 
me,  my  Interpreter,  and  other  dear  Friends  who  were  with 
me  :  God  gave,  rometimes,  a  goodDegree  of  Freedom  inPray- 
er  for  the  ingatnering  of  Souls  there  ;  and  I  could  not  but  en- 
tertain a  itiong  Hope,  that  the  Journey,  fhould  not  be  wholly 
fruiclefs.  VVhelher  the  IfTue  of  it  would  be  the  fetting  upChrift's 
Kingdom  iberey  or  only  the  drawing  of  feme  few  Perfons  down 
to  my  Congregation  in  New-Jerfey^  or  whether  they  were 
now  only  preparing  for  fome  further  Attempts,  that  might  be 
made  among  them,  I  did  not  determine  :  But  I  was  perfwaded, 
the  Journey  would  not  be  loft.  Blefled  be  God,  that  I  had 
any  Encouragement  and  Hope. 

Tuefday,  Sept,  p.  Rode  down  the  River,  near  30  Miles. 
Was  extreme  weak,  much  fatigued,  and  wet  with  a  Thunder- 
Storm.  Difcourfed  with  fome  Warmth  and  Clofenefs  to  fome 
poor  ignorant  Souls,  on  the  Life  and  Power  of  Religion  ;  what 
were  and  what  were  not  iht  Evidencts  oi  it.  They  feem'd 
much  aftonifh*d,  when  they  faw  my  Indians  afk  a  BleilingaBd 
give  Thanks  at  Dinner  ;  concluding  that  a  very  highEvidence 
of  Grace  in  them  :  But  were  aftonifhed,  when  I  infifted  that 
neither  that,  nofyet  fecret  Prayer,  was  any  furc  Evidence  of 
Grace.  Oh  the  Ignorance  of  the  World  !  How  are  fome 
empty  outward  Formsy  that  may  all  be  inurtXy  felfijl?,  miftaken 
for  true  Religion,  infallible  Evidences  of  it  !  The  Lord  pity  a 
deluded  World. 

Wednefday,  Sept,  10.  Rode  near  twenty  Miles  homeward. 
Was  much  folicited  to  preach,  but  was  utterly  unable,  thro' 
bodily  Weaknefs.  Was  extremely  overdone  with  the  Heat 
and  Showers  this  Day,  and  coughed  up  confiderable  Blood. 

Thurfday,  Sept.  11.  Rode  homeward  ;  but  was  very  weak, 
and  fometimes  fcarce  able  to  ride.  Had  a  very  importunateln- 
vitation  to  preach  ataMeeting-Houfel  came  by,  thePeople  be- 
ing then  gathering  ;  but  could  not,byReafon  of  Weaknefs.  Was 
refigned  and  compofed  under  my  Weaknefs  ;  but  was  much 
exercifed  with  Concern  for  my  Companions  in  Travel,  whom 
I  had  left  with  much  Regret,  fome  lame,  and  fome  fick. 

Friday,  iSlf^/.  12.  Rode  about  fifty  Miles  ;  and  camejuft  at 
Night  to  a  Chrifiian  Eriemi'sHoufe,  about  25  Miles Wef^ward 
from  Philadelphia.  Was  courteoufly  received,  and  kindly  en- 
tertained, and  found  my  feif  much  refrefa'd  in  the  midft  of  my 
Weaknefs  andFatigues. 

Saturda^'^ 


206    Ml  29:  Iht  LIFE 

Saturday,  Sept.  13.  Was  ftill  agreably  entertained  with 
Chriftian  Friendihip,  and  allThings  neceflary  for  my  weakCir- 
cumftances  ;  In  the  Afternoon,  heard  Mr.  ^r^at  preach  5 
and  was  refrefh'd   in  Convcrlation  with  him,  in  the  JEvcning. 

LordVDay,  ^^/>M4.  At  the  Defire  of  Mr.  Tr^fl/  and  the 
Pctiple,  I  preach'd  bor/i  Parts  of  the  Day  (  but  fhort )  from 
Luk,  xiv.  23.  God  gave  me  fome  Freedom  and  Warmth  in 
my  Difcourfe  ;  and  1  truft,  helped  me  in  fome  Meafure  to  la- 
bour inftngknefs  of  Heart,  Was  much  tired  in  the  Evening, 
but  was  comforted  with  the  moft  tender  Treatment  1  ever  met 
with  in  my  Life.  My  Mind,  thro'  the  whole  of  this  Day, 
was  exceeding  calm  ;  and  I  could  afk  for  nothing  in  Prayer, 
with  any  Encouragement  of  Soul^  but  that  the  fFill  of  God 
might  he  (ione. 

Monday,  Sept.  15.  Spent  the  whole  Day,  in  Concert  with 
Mr.  Tre(.t,  ift  JEndeavours  to  compofe  a  Difference,  fubfifting 
between  certain  Perfons  in  the  Congregation  where*  we  now 
were  :  There  feem'd  to  be  a  Blefling  on  our  Endeavours.  In 
theEvening, baptized  aChild  :  Was  in  a  calm  compofed Frame, 
and  enjoyed  (  I  trufl  )  a  fpiritual  Senfe  of  di\une  Things,while 
adminiftring  the  Ordinance.  Afterwards,  fpent  the  Time  in 
religious  Converfation,  'till  late  in  the  Night.  This  was  indeed 
a  pleafant  agreable  Evening. 

Tuefday,  Sept.  16.  Continued  ftill  at  my  Friend's  Houfe, 
about  25  Miles  Weftward  o^»  Philadelphia,  Was  very  weak, 
unable  to  perform  any  Bufinefs,  and  fcarcely  able  to  fit  up. 

Wednefday,  Sept.  17.  Rode  into  Philadelphia,  Still  very 
weak,  and  my  Cough  and  fpitting  of  Blood  continued.  Enjoy- 
ed fome  agreable  Converfation  with  Friends,  but  wanted  more 
Spirituality. 

Thurfday,  Sept.  18.  Went  (rom  Philadelphia  ioMr,  Treat's  : 
W'as  agreably  entertained  on  the  Road  i  and  was  in  a  fweet 
compofed  Frame,  in  the  Evening. 

Friday,  Sept.  19.  Rode  from  Mr.  Treat's  to  Mr.  Stockton's 
at  Prince-Town  :  Was  extrcam  weak,  but  kindly  received  and 
cntertain'd.     Spent  the  Evening  with    fome  Degree  of  Satis* 

Saturday,  Sept.  '/o.  Arrived  among  my  own  People,  juft  at 
Night  :  Fouud  'em  praying  together  :  Wentinjand  gave  them 
fome  Account  of  God's  Dealmgs  with  me  and  my  Companions 
in  ihcjourney  ;  which  feem'd  afFe<Sling  to  them.  I  then  pray'd 
with  :hem,  and  thought  the  divine  Prefence  was  amongft  us  ; 
ilivers  weie  m;hed  into  Tca^s,  and  feem'd  to  have  a  Senfe  of 

Divine 


ip/  Mr.  David  Brainerd:    A.D. 1 74S.     207 

divtne  Things.  Being  very  weak,  I  was  obliged  foon  to  re- 
pair to  my  Lodgings,  and  felt  much  worn  out,  in  the  Evening. 
Thus  God  has  carried  me  thro*  the  Fatigues  and  Perils  of  ano- 
ther Journey  to  Su/quabannah^2ind  returned  me  again  in  Safety, 
tho*  under  a  great  Degree  of  bodily  Indifpofuion.  Oh  that 
my  Soul  were  truly  thankful  for  renewed  Inftances  of  Mercy  I 
Many  Hardfhips  andDiftrefles  I  endured  in  this  Journey  :  But 
the  Lor^  fupported  me  under  them  all. 


Part     VIIL 

j^fi^er  his  Return  from  his  laji  your  my  to 
Sufquahannah,  until  his  Death. 

[iV.  ^.TjriTHERTO  Mr.  Braimrd  had  kept  a  ccnftant 
Jj^  Diary,  giving  an  Account  of  what  pafs'd  from 
Day  to  Day,  with  very  little  Interruption  : 
But  henceforward  his  Diary  is  very  much  interrupted  by  his 
Jllnefs  ;  under  which  he  was  often  brought  fo  low,  as  either 
not  to  be  capable  of  writing,  or  not  well  able  to  bear  the  Bur- 
den of  a  Care  fo  confiant,  as  was  requifite,  to  recollsft,  every 
Evening, what  had  palled  in  the  Day, and  digefl  it,  and  fet  down 
an  orderly  Account  of  it  in  Writing.  However,  his  Diary 
was  not  wholly  negleded  5  but  he  took  Care,  from  Time  to 
Time,  to  take  fome  Notice  in  it  of  the  moft  material  Things 
concerning  himfelf  and  the  State  of  his  Mind,.even  till  within  a 
few  Days  of  his  Death  j  as  the  Reader  will  fee  afterwards.  *  j 

Lord's- Day, 


Mr.  Shepard^  in  his  SeJe£f  Cafes  rtfolvidj  under  the  firft 
Cafe  fays  as  follows.  <  *  I  have  lately  known  one  very  able, 
*'  wife,  and  godly,  put  upon  the  Rack,  by  him  that  en- 
**  vyingGod'sPeople's  Peace,knows  how  to  change  him- 
*'  felf  into  zn  Angel  of  Light :  For  it  being  his  ufualCourfe 
*'  in  the  Time  of  his  Health  to  make  aDiary  of  his  hourly 
"  Life,  and  finding  much  Benefit  by  it,  he  was  in  Con- 
£  e  fcicflce 


** 


2o8    Mt.i^l  ?i^tIFE      i 

Lord's-Day  ,  ^epu  21.  1 746.  I  was  fo  weak  I  ccmid  n6f 
preach,  nor  pretend  to  ride  over  to  my  People  in  tbeForcnoon. 
In  the  Afternoon,  rode  out ;  fat  in  my  Chair,  and  difcourfed 
tomyPeoplc  itoiaRom,  xiv.  7,8.  I  was  ftrengthen'd  and  helped 
in  my  Difcourfe :  And  there  appeared  fomething  agreablc  in 
the  AfTembly.  I  returned  to  my  Lodgings  extremely  tired  ; 
kut  thankful,  that  I  had  been  enabled  to  fpeak  a  Word  to  my 
poor  People  I  had  been  fo  long  abfent  from.  Was  able  to 
fleep  very  little  this  Night,  thro'  Wcarinefs  and  Pain.  Oh, 
how  bleffed  fliould  I  be,  if  the  little  I  do  were  all  done  with 
light  Views  !  Oh  that  whether  llive^l  might //«;*  to  iheLttrd^Ucm 

Saturday,  Sept,  27.  Spent  this  Day,  as  well  as  the  whole 
Week  paft,  under  a  great  Degree  of  bodily  Weaknefs,  exer- 
cifed  with  a  violent  Cough,  and  a  confiderable  Fever ;  had  no 
Appetite  to  any  Kind  of  Food  ;  and  frequently  brought  up  what 
I  eat,  as  foon  as  it  was  down ;  and  oftentimes  had  little  Ref( 
in  my  Bed,  by  Reafon  of  Pains  in  my  Breaft  and  Back  :  Waa 
able,  however,  to  ride  over  to  my  People,  about  two  Miles, 
every  Day,  and  take  fome  Care  of  thofe  who  were  then  at 
Work  upon  a  fmall  Houfe  for  me  to  refide  in  amongft  thelndi- 
ens.  *  I  was  fometimes  fcarce  able  to  walk,  and  never  able 
to  fit  up  the  whole  Day,thro'  the  Week.  Was  calm  and  com- 
pofed,  and  but  little  exercifed  with  melancholy  Damps,  as  in 
former  Seafons  of  weaknefs :  Whether  I  fliould  ever  recover, 
or  no,  feemM  very  doubtful  ;  but  this  was  many  times  a  Com- 
Ibrt  to  me,that/.//V  ^nd Death  did  not  depend  upon  my  Choice, 
I  was  pleafed,  to  think,  that  he  who  is  infinitely  wife,  had  the 

«'  fciencc  prefs'd,  by  the  Power  and  Dclufion  of  Satan,. 
<«  to  make  and  take  the  fame  daily  Survey  of  his  Life  in 
*«  theTime  of  his  Sickneft :  By  Means  of  which  he  fpent 
««  his  enfeebled  Spirits,  caft  on  Fuel  to  fire  his  Sicknefs. 
*«  Had  not  a  Friend  of  his  convinced  him  of  his  erroneous 
< «  Confcience  mifleading  him  at  thatTime,be  had  murdct'd 
«  hisBodyjOutofConfciencetofavehisSoulandtopreferve 
*«  his  Grace.  And  do  you  think  ihtfe  were  theMotions  of 
«'  God'sSpirit.which  WkQihokLocufls^RevAX,  9,  10.  Had 
««  Faces  like^//«,  but  had  Tails  like  Scorphns.^nd  Stings 
««  in  their  Tails?" 
*  This  was  the  /ir/r//^  Houfe  he  built  for  his  Rcfidencca- 
mon^  the  Indiam.  Befidcs  that  at  Kaunaumeek.  and  that 
at  the  Folks  of  Delawaigy  and  another  a*  Crojweikjung^ 
he  bwilt  oiia  now  at  Cranhefry,  Determination 


(>/ Mf.  David  Bfaifierd.        A.D.i;46.  209 

Determination  of  this  Mattel  ;  and  that  I  had  no  Trouble,  to 
confidcr  and  weighThings  upon  all-Sides, in  order  to  make  the 
Choice,  whether  I  would  live  or  die.  Thus  my  Time  was 
confumed  ;  I  had  little  Strength  to  pray, none  to  write  or  read, 
and  fcarce  any  to  meditate  :  But  thro'  divineGoodnefs,!  could 
with  great  Compofure  look  Death  in  the  Face,  and  frequently 
with  fenfible  Joy.  Oh,  how  blefled  it  is,  to  be  habitually  pre* 
partd  for  Death  !  The  Lord  grant,  that  I  may  be  actually  rea-* 
dy  alfo. 

Lord's- Day,  Sipt^  28.  Rode  to  my  People  ;  and  tho*  under 
much  Weaknefs,  attempted  to  preach,from  2  Cbr.xiii.  5.  Dif- 
Gourfed  about  half  an  Hour;  at  which  Seafon  divine  Power 
feem'd  to  attend  the  Word  :  But  being  extreme  weak,  I  was 
obliged  to  defift  ;  and  after  a  Turn  of  Faintnefs,  with  much 
Difficulty,  rode  to  my  Lodgings;  where  betaking  my  h\i  to 
my  Bed,  I  lay  in  a  burning  Fever,  and  almoft  delirious,  for 
feveral  Hours ;  'till  towards  Morning,  my  Fever  went  oiF 
with  a  violent  Sweat.  I  have  often  been  fcverifh,  and  unable 
to  rch  quietly  after  Preaching  ;  but  this  was  the  moft  fevere 
diftreiling  Turn,  that  ever  Preaching  brought  upon  me.  Yet 
I  felt  perfe<Slly  at  Keft  in  my  own  Mind,  becaufe  1  had  made 
my  utmoft  Attempts  to  fpeak  for  God,  and  knew  I  could  do 
no  more. 

Tucfday,  Sept.  30.  Yefterday,  and  to  Day,  was  in  the 
fame  weak  State,  or  rather  weaker  than  in  Days  paft  ;  was 
Ccarce  able  to  fit  up  half  the  Day.  Was  in  a  compofed  Frame 
of  Mind,  remarkably  free  from  Dejedion  and  melancholy 
Damps  i  as  God  has  been  pleafed,  in  great  Meafure,  to  deli- 
ver me  from  thefe  unhappy  Glooms,  in  the  general  Courfe  of 
my  prefsnt  weaknefs  hitherto,  and  alfo  from  a  peevifh  froward 
Spirit :  And  Oh,  how  great  a  Mercy  is  this  !  Oh  that  I  might 
always  be  perfe<31y  quiet  in  Seafons  of  greateft Weaknefs, a) tho" 
Nature  (hould  fink  and  fail.  Oh  that  I  may  always  be  able 
with  utmoft  Sincerity  to  fay.  Lord,  not  my  IVill^  but  thine  he., 
done  /  This,  thro'  Grace,  I  can  fay  at  prefent,  with  Regard  to'* 
Life  or  Death  ;  The  Lord  do  with  me  aifeemsgood  in  his  Sight  ; 
that  whether  I  live  or  die,  I  may  glorify  him^  who  is  worthy  to 
receive  Bkjjing^  and  Honour^  and  Dominion  forever*  Jmen. 

Saturday,  O£foh,  4.  Spent  the  former  Part  of  this  Week  un- 
der a  great  Degree  of  Infirmity  and  Diforder,  as  I  had  done 
feveral  Weeks  before  :  Was  able  however  to  ride  a  little  every 
Day,  altho'  unable  to  fit  up  half  the  Day,  'till  Thurfday. 
Took  fome  Care  daily  of  fomePcrfons  at  work  upon  myHoufe. 

E  e  a  |Pn 


m. 


Iio      ^/.  29:  fbi  LIFE 

On  Friday,  aft*r  Noon,found  my  felf  wonderfully  revived  and 
ftrengthen'd  ;  and  having  fome  Time  before  given  Notice  to 
my  People,  and  thofe  •f  'em  at  the  Forks  of  Delaware  in  parti- 
cular, that  I  defigned  with  Leave  of  Providence,  to  adminifter 
the  Sacrament  of  the  Lord's  Supper  upon  the  firft  Sabbath  in 
OSiober^  the  Sabbath  now  approaching,  on  Friday- Afternoon  I 
preach'd,  preparatory  to   the  Sacrament,  from  iC^r.  xiii.  5. 
Finifhing  what  I  had  propofed  to  offer  upon  the  Subject  the 
Sabbath  before.  The  Sermon  was  blefs'd  of  God  to  the  ftirring 
up  religious  AfFc6lion,  and    a  Spirit  of  Devotion,  in  the  Peo- 
ple of  God  ;  and  to  the  greatly  afFeding  one  who  had  back' 
/7/V<^^«  from  God,  which  caufed  him  to   judge   and   condemn 
himfelf.     I  was  furprizingly  ftrengthned  in  my  Work,  while  I 
was  fpeaking  :  But  was  obliged  immediately  after  to  repair  to 
Bed,  beins  now  removed  into  my  own  Houfe  among  the  /«- 
dians ;  which  gave  me  fuch  fpeedy  Relief  and  Refrefhment, 
as  I  could  not  well  have  liv'd  without.     Spent  fome  Time  on 
Frida)'*Night  in  converfing  with  my  People  about  divineThings, 
as  I  lay  upon  my  Bed  ;  and  found  my  Soul  refrefh'd,   tho'  my 
Body  was  weak.     This  being  Saturday,  I  difcourfed    particu- 
larly with  divers  of  the  Communicants  ;  and  this   Afternoon 
preach'd  from  Z^r^.  xii.  10.  There    feem'd    to  be  a  tender 
Melting,  and  hearty  mourning  for  Sin,  inNumbers  in  theCon- 
gregation.     MySoulwasin    a  comfortable  Frame,   and  I  en- 
joy'd  Freedom  andAffiftance  in  publick  Service  :  Was  my  felf, 
as  well  as  moftof  the  Congregation,    much  afFe£led  with  the 
humble  ConfefTion,  and  apparent  Broken-heartednefs  of  the 
forementioned    Bachfnder  ;  and   could  not  but  rejoyce,  that 
God  had  given  him  inch  a  Senfe  of  his  Sin  and  Unworthinefs. 
Was  extremely  tired  in  the  Evening ;  but  lay  on  my  Bed,  and 
difcourfed  to  my  People. 

Lord*3-Day,  O^^ib.  5.  Was  ftill  very  weak  ;  and  in  the 
Morning,  confiderably  afraid  I  flnuld  not  be  able  to  go  thro' 
-  the  Work  of  the  Day  ;  having  much  to  do,  both  in  private  and 
'  publick.  Difcourfed  before  the  Adminiflration  of  the  Sacra- 
ment, from  y^A.  i.  29.  Behold  the  Lamb  of  God^  that  iaketh 
away  the  Sin  of  the  IVorld.  Where  I  confidered,  I.  Jn  what  Re- 
fpcdtsChrilt  is  called  thcLamb  of  God  ;  and  obferved  that  he  is  fa 
called,  (  I  )  From  the  Purity  and  Innocency  of  his  Nature. ( *  ) 
From  his  Meeknefs  and  Patience  under  Sufl'erings.  (  3  )  From 
his  being  that  Atonement^  which  was  poiilted  out  in  the  Sacrifici 
of  Lambs,  and  in  particular  by  ihe  pafchal  h^mb,  II.  Confi- 
dered bow  and  in  Vhat  Senfc  he  taka  away  the  ^inofikiWorld  : 

ArA 


cf  Mr,  David  Bralnerd,      A.D.  1 746.     2 1 1 

And  obferved,  that  the  Means  and  Manner,  in  and  by  v/hich 
he  takes  avt-ay  the  Sins  of  Men,  was  his  giving  himfelf  for  tbem^ 
doing  and  fuffering  in  theirRoom  and  Stead, ^fff.  And  he  is  faid 
to  take  away  the  Sin  of  the  Worlds  not  becaufe  all  the  World 
(hall  aSiually  be  redeemed  from  Sin  by  him,  but  becaufe,  (  i  ) 
He  has  done  and  fuftered  fufficient  to  anfwer  for  the  Sins  of  the 
World,  and  fo  to  redeem  all  Mankind  ;  (^  2  )  He  eBually  does 
take  away  the  Sins  of  the  eleSf  World.  And  III.  Confidered 
how  we  are  to  behold  him, in  order  to  have  our  Sins  taken  away. 
(  I )  Not  with  our  bodily  Eyes :  Nor  (  2  )  By  imagining  him 
on  theCrofs,  t^c.  But  by  z  fpiritual  View  of  his  Glory  and 

Goodnefs,  engaging  the  Soul  to  rely  on  him,  ^c. The  di- 

vinePrefence  attended  thisDifcourfe  ;  and  theAfTembly  was  con- 
fidcrably  melted  withdivineTrutbs.  After  Sermon  baptized  two 
Perfons.  Then  adminiftred  theLord's  Supper  to  near  40  Com- 
municants, of  the /«i/5«j,  bcfides  divers  dear  Chriftians  of  the 
white  People.  It  feem*d  to  be  a  Seafon  of  divine  Power  and 
Grace  ;  and  Numbers  feemM  to  rejoycc  in  God.  Oh,  the 
fwect  Union  and  Harmony  then  appearing  among  the  religious 
Feople  !  My  Soul  was  refrefh'd,  and  my  reli'gious  Friends,  of 
the  whitePeople,  with  me.  After  the  Sacramentjcould  fcarcely 
get  home,  tho'  it  was  not  more  than  20  Rods  ;  but  was  fup- 
ported  and  led  by  my  Friends,  and  laid  on  my  Bed  ;  where  I 
lay  in  Pain  'till  fomeTime  in  the  Evening  5  and  then  was  able 
to  lit  up  and  difcourfc  withFriends.  Oh,  how  was  thisDay  fpent 
in  Prayers  and  Praifes  among  my  dearPeople  !  One  might  hear 
them,  all  the  Morning,  before  publick  Worfhip,  and  ia>tl»c 
Evening,  'till  near  Midnight,  praying  and  Tinging^ praifes  to 
God,  in  one  or  other  of  their  Houfes.  MySoul  was  refrefh'd, 
tho'  my  Body  was  weak. 

[  This  Week,  he  went  (  in  a  very  low  State }  in  f^joD^ys^ 
to  Elifabeth-Town^  to  attend  the  Meeting  of  the  Synod  there  : 
But  was  difappointed  by  it's  Removal  to  New-Tor k.  He  con- 
tinued in  a  very  compofed  comfortable  Frame  of  Mind.  J 

Saturday,  Oi?tf/^.  11,  Towards  Night  was  feized  with  an 
Ague ,  which  was  followed  with  a  hard  Fever,and  confiderable 
Pain  :  Was  treated  with  great  Kindnefs,  and  was  afhamed  to 
fee  fo  much  Concern  about  fo  unworthy  a  Creature,  as  I  knew 
my  felf  to  be.  Was  in  a  comfortable  Frame  of  Mind,  wholly 
fibmiflive,  with  Regard  to  Life  or  Death.  It  was  indeed  a 
peculiar  Satisfaction  to  me,to  lfeink,that  it  was  not  w>Concern 

ox 


212      mt,  29:  TZ-i?   LIFE 

or  Bufmcfs  to  fletermine  whether  I  (hould  live  or  die^i  I  like- 
wife  felt  peculiarly  fatisfied,  while  under  this  uncommon  De- 
gree of  Diforder ;  beiog  now  fully  convinced  of  my  being  really 
weak,  and  unable  to  perform  ray  Work  ;  whereas  at  other 
Times  my  Mind  was  perplex'd  with  Fears,  that  I  was  a  Mif- 
improvcr  of  Time,  by  conceiting  I  was  fick,  when  I  was  not 
in  Reality  fo.  Oh, how  precious  is  Time  t  And  how  guilty  it 
makes  me  feel,  when  I  think  I  have  trifled  away  and  mifim- 
proved  it,  or  ncgle6led  to  fill  up  each  Part  of  it  with  Duty,  to 
t\it  utmoft  of  my  Ability  and  Capacity  ! 

LordVDay,  Of/^*.  12.  Was  fcarce  able  to  fit  up,  in  the 
Forenoon  ;  In  the  Afternoon,  attended  publick  Worfhip,  and 
was  in  a  compofed  and  comfortable  Frame. 

LordVDay,  Octoh,  19.  Was  fcarcely  able  to  do  any  Thing 
at  all  in  the  Week  pafl,  except  that  on  Thurfday  I  rode  out 
about  four  Miles  3  at  which  Time  I  took  Cold.  As  I  was  able 
to  dolittieor  nothing,  fo  I  enjoyed  not  much  Spirituality,  or 
lively  religious  AiFedlion  ;  tho'  at  fome  Times  I  longed  much 
to  be  more  fruitful  and  full  of  heavenly  AfFedtion  5  and  was 
grieved  to  fee  the  Hours  Aide  away,  while  I  could  do  nothing 
for  God. Was  able,  this  Day,  to  attend  publick  Wor- 
fhip. Was  compofed  and  comfortable,  willing  either  to  die  or 
live  ;  but  found  it  hard  to  be  reconciled  to  the  Tho'tsof  living 
Ufelefi,  Oh  that  I  might  never  live  to  be  a  Burden  to  C§od*s 
Creation  ;  but  that  I  might  be  allowed  to  repair  Homt^  when 
fnyfojourning  Work  is  done. 

[  This  Week,  he  went  back  to  his  Indians  at  Cranberry,  to 
take  fome  Care  of  their  fpiritual  and  temporal  Concerns  :  And 
was  much  fpent  with  riding  ;  tho*  he  rode  but  a  little  Way"  in 
a  Day.  ] 

Thurfday,  Octob.  23.  Went  to  my  own  Houfc,  and  fct 
Things  in  Order.  Was  very  weak,  and  fomewhat  melan- 
choly :  Laboured  to  do  fomething,  but  had  no  Strength  5  and 
was  forced  to  He  down  on  my  Bed,  ve^ry  folitary. 

Friday,  Octob.  24.  Spent  the  Day  in  overfeeihg  and  dire£t- 
ingmy  People,  about  mending  their  Fence,  and  fecuring  their 
Wheat.  Found,  that  all  their  Concerns  of  a  fecular  Nature 
depended  upon  me.. — — ---  Was  fomewhat  refrefh'd  in  the 
Evening,  having  been  able  to  do  fomething  valuable  in  the 
Day-7  line.  Oh,  how  it  paips  me,  t6  fee  Time  pafs  away, 
wl^iiaFf^^i)  ^0  nothing  to  a»y  Purpofe  ! 

Saturday, 


'^fMr.  David  BVainerd:*    A.D.  1746,'  215. 

Saturday,  Octoh.  25.  Vifited  fome  of  my  People  ;  fpent 
foincTime  in  writing,and  felt  much  better  inBody,than  ufual : 
When  it  was  near  Night,  I  it\i  fo  well,  that  I  had  Tho'ts 
of  expounding  :  But  in  theEvcning  was  much  difordered  again, 
and  fpent  the  Night  in  Coughing,  and  fjpitting  of  Blood. 

LordVDay,  Ocioh»  26.  In  the  Morning,  was  exceeding 
weak  :  Spent  the  Day,  'till  near  Night,in  Pain  to  fee  my  poor 
People,  wandring  as  Sheep  not  having  a  Shepherdy  waiting  and 
hoping  to  fee  me  able  to  preach  to  them  before  Night :  It 
couJd  not  but  diftrefs  me,  to  fee  *em  in  this  Cafe,  and  to  find 
my  felf  unable  to  attempt  any  Thing  for  their fpiritual  Benefit. 
But  towardsNight,  finding  my  felf  a  little  bett«r,  I  calPd  them 
together  to  my  Houfe,  and  fat  down  and  read  and  expounded 
Matth.  V.  I,  "^  -^  16.  ThisDifcourfe,  tho'  delivered  in  much 
Weaknefs,  was  attended  with  Power  to  many  of  the  Hearers  j 
cfpecially  what  was  fpoken  upon  the  laftof  thofeVerfes ;  where 
I  infifted  on  the  infinite  Wrong  done  to  Religion,  by  having 
our  Light  become  Darhefs,  inftead  o^ /Inning  before  Men.  As 
many  in  the  Congregation  were  now  deeply  afFe(Sled  with  2 
Senfe  of  their  Deficiency,  in  Regard  of  a  fpiritual  Converfati- 
on,  that  might  recommend  Religion  to  others,  and  as  a  Spirit 
of  Concern  and  Watchfulnefs  feem'd  to  be  excited  in  them  ; 
fo  there  was  one,  in  particular,  that  had  fallen  into  the  Sin  of 
Drunkennefs,  fome  Time  before,  who  was  now  deeply  con- 
vinced  of  his  Sin,  and  the  great  Dilhonour  done  to  Religion 
by  his  Mifconded,  and  difcovered  a  great  Degree  of  Grief  and 
Concern  on  that  Account.  My  Soul  was  refrcfh'd,  to  fee 
this.  And  the*  I  had  no  Strength  to  fpeak  (o  much  as  I  would 
have  done,  but  was  obliged  to  lie  dov/n  on  the  Bed  :  Yet  I  re- 
joyced  to  fee  fuchan  humbleMeltfng  in  theCongregation  ;  and 
that  divine  Truths,  tho'  faintly  delivered^,  were  attended  with 
fo  much  Efficacy  upon  the  Auditory. 

Monday,  Octob,  27.  Spent  the  Day  in  overfceing  and 
direfting  the  IndianSy  about  msnding  the  Fence  round  their 
Wheat  :  Was  able  to  walk  with  them,  and  contrive  their  Bu- 
finefs,  all  the  Forenoon,  in  the  Afternoon,  was  vifited  by  two 
dear  Friends, and  fpent  fomeTime  \a  Converfntion  with  them  ; 
towardsNight,  was  able  to  walkout,  and  take  Care  of  the 
Indians  again.     In  the  Evening, enjoyed  a  \Giy  peacefi:] Frame. 

Tuefday,  Ociob.  28.    Rode  to  Prince-Town^  in  a  very  ^eak 

Sta^e  :  Had  fuch  a  vicleniFever,by  the  Way,  that  I  was  ^oxQz^i 

to  alight  at  a  Friend's  Houfe  i^f  nd  lie  down  {^^  fomc  Twe. 

NearN'ghtjWas  vifice^  byMr.  fn^/,  fvlr.^^^/jj^^nd  his  Wife, 

**  and 


114    JEt.z^:  Ti/fLIFE 

and  another  Friend  :  My  Spirits  were  refrefh'd,  to  fee  them  5 
but  I  was  furprized,  and  even  afhamed,  that  they  had  taken  fo 
niuchPains  as  to  ride3o  or  4oMiles  to  fee  me  !  Was  able  to  fit 
up  moft  oi  the  Evening  ;  and  fpent  the  Time  in  a  very  com* 
forrable  Manner  with  my  Friends. 

Wednefday,  Octob.  29.  Rode  about  10  Miles,  with  my 
Friends  that  came  Yefterday  to  fee  me  ;  and  then  parted  with 
them,  all  but  one,  who  ftay'd  on  Purpofe  to  keep  me  Compa- 
ny, and  cheer  my  Spirits.  Was  extreme  weak,  and  very 
fcvcrifh,  efpecially  towards  Night ;  but  enjoyed  Comfort  and 
Satisfadlion. 

Thurfday,  OSiob,  30.  Rode  3  or  4  MiIes,to  vifit  l/ix,WaUi : 
Spent  fomeTime,in  an  agreabJeMannerjin  Converfation  ;  and 
tho'  extreme  weak,  enjoyed  a  comfortable  compofcd  Frame  of 
Mind.         . 

Friday,  Of /<?^.  31.  Spent  the  Day  amongFriendSjin  a  com- 
fortable Frame  ot  Mind,  tho'  exceeding  weak,  and  under  a 
confiderable  Fever. 

Saturday,  November  i.  Took  Leave  of  Friends,  after 
having  fpent  the  Forenoon  with  them,  and  returned  Home  to 
my  own  Houfe.  Was  much  difordered  in  the  Evening,  and 
opprefs'd  with  my  Cough  %  which  has  now  been  conftant  for  a 
long  Time,  with  a  bard  Fain  in  my  Breaft,  and  Fever. 

Lord'; -Day,  Ncv.  2.  Was  unable  to  preach,  and  fcarcely 
able  to  fit  up,  the  whole  Day.  Was  grieved,  and  almoft  funk, 
to  fee  my  poor  People  deftitute  of  the  Means  of  Grace ;  efpe- 
cially confidejiDg  they  could  not  read,  and  fo  were  under  great 
Difadvantages  for  fpending  theSabbath  comfortably.  Oh,me- 
thought,  I  could  be  contented  to  be  fick,  if  my  poor  Flock  had 
a  faithful  Paftor  to  feed  them  with  fpiritual  Knowledge!  A 
View  of  their  Want  of  this  was  more  afflidiive  to  me,  than  all 
my  bodily  Illncfs, 

Monday,  h'ov.  3.  Being  now  in  fo  weak  and  low  a  State, 
that  1  v/as  utterly  uncapable  of  performing  my  Work,  and  hav- 
ing little  Hope  of  Recovery^  unlefs  by  much  Riding,  I  thought 
it  myDuty  to  take  a  lengthy  Journey  intoNsw-Eng/and^and  to 
divert  my  fcU  among  myFriends,whom  1  had  not  now  feen  for  a 
long  Time.     Aid  accordingly  took  Leave  of  my  Congregation 

this  Day. Before  I  left  my  People,  I  vifited   them  all  in 

their  rcfpc(5iivcHcufes,r.nd  difcourfed  to  each  one,  as  I  thought 

jBoli  pic  per  i;iid  fuitsble  for  their  Circumftances,  and  found 

jKt^  Freedom  and  Aii^flancein  fo  doing  :  I  fcarcely  left  one 

I  :>    ''.  but  1(  me  were  inTcarsj  and  many  were  not  only  aiFe6ted 

with 


cf  Mr.  David  Bralncra.'    A.D.  1746.     2 1  .• 

with  my  being  about  to  leave  them,  but  with  the  folemn  M- 
drejfss  I  made  them  upon  divine  Things ;  for  I  was  helped  to 
be  (ervent  in  Spirit,  while  I  difcourfed  to  them.  When  I  had 
thus  gone  through  my  Congregation  (  which  took  me  moft  oi 
theDay  )  and  had  taken  leave  of  them,  and  of  the  School,  I  left 
Home,  and  rode  about  two  Miles,  to  the  Houfe  where  I  lived 
in  the  Summer  paft,  and  there  lodg'd.  Was  refrefh'd,  this 
Eveningjin  that  I  had  left  myCongregation  fo  well  difpofcdand 
afFecSte^,  and  that  I  had  been  fo  much  aflifted  in  making  mv 
Farewel-AddrefTcs  to  them. 

Tuefday,  Nov,  4.  Rode  to  Woodhridgef  and  lodg'd  with 
Mr.  Pierfon  ;  continuing  ftill  in  a  very  weak  State. 

Wednefday,  TSlov,  5.  Rode  to  Elifahsth-Town ;  intending^, 
as  foon  as  poffible,to  profecute  myjourney  intoNew-Englami . 
But  was,  in  anHouror  two  after  myArrivaljtakenmuch  worie. 

After  this,  for  near  a  Week,  was  confined  to  my  Chamber, 
and  moft  of  the  Time  to  my  Bed  :  And  then  fo  far  revived  a^ 
to  be  able  to  walk  about  the  Houfe  ;  but  was  ftill  conSnci 
within  Doors. 

In  the  Beginning  of  this  extraordinary  Turn  of  Diforder,  after 
my  coming  to  Elifabeth'Town^  I  was  enabled  thro'  Mercy  to 
maintain  a  calm  compofed  and  patient  Spirit,  as  I  had  beeu 
before  from  the  Beginning  of  my  Wcaknefs.  After  I  had  been 
in  EUfabeth-Town  about  a  Fortnight,  and  had  fo  far  recovered 
that  I  was  able  to  walk  about  Houfe,  upon  a  Day  of  Thankf- 
giving  kept  in  this  Place,  I  was  enabled  to  recall  and  recount 
over  the  Mercies  of  God,  in  fuch  a  Manner  as  greatly  afl'ettcv; 
me,  and  fill'd  me  ( I  think  )  with  Thankfulnefs  and  Fraifc  (a 
God  :  Efpecially  my  Soul  praisM  him  for  his  Work  of  Grsce 
among  the  i«^/^«;,  and  the  Enlargement  of  his  dearKing-iom  : 
My  Soul  blefs'dGod  for  what  he  is  in  himfelf,  and  adored  him, 
that  he  ever  would  difplay  himfelf  to  Creatures  :  I  rejoyced., 
that  he  was  God,  and  longed  that  all  (hould  know  h,  and  feel 
it,  and  rejoyce  in  it.  Lord,  glorify  thy  [elf,  was  the  Defire  and 
Cry  of  my  Soul.  Oh  that  alt  People  might  Icve  and  praifc  the 
blefTed  God  :  That  he  might  have  all  poffible  Honour  and 
Glory  from  the  intelligent  World.  * 

After  thiscomfortableThankfgiving-Seafon,  I  frequently  en* 
joyed  Freedom  and  Enlargement  and  Engagednefs  of  Soul  in 


About  this  Time  he  wrote  the  yth  Leiiet^  pMidic:  :. 
the  End  of  this  Account  of  his  Lire. 

F  f  Prayer, 


^i6     'y^.  if9.  ^he  LIFE 

Prayer,  and  was  enabled  to  intercede  with  God  for  my  ccar 
Congregation,  very  often  for  every  Family,  and  every  Perfon, 
in  particular  ',  and  it  was  often  a  great  Comfort  to  me,  that  I 
could  pray  heartily  to  God  for  thofejto  whom  I  could  not  fpeak, 
and  whom  I  was  not  allowed  to  fee.  But  at  other  Times,  my 
Spirits  were  fo  flat  and  Jow,  and  my  bodily  Vigour  fo  much 
y/afted,  that  I  had  fcarce  any  Affections  at  all. 

In  December^  I  had  revived  fo  far  as  to  be  able  to  walk  abroad, 
and  vifit  Friends,  and  feem'd  to  be  on  the  gaining  Hand  with 
Regard  tomyHealth,  inthe  main,until  Lord's-Day  Decemb.^i. 
At  which  Time  I  went  to  the  piblick  Worfhip  ;  ind  it  being 
S»crament-Day,  I  laboured  much,  at  the  Lord's-Table,  to 
bring  forth  a  certain  Corruption,  and  have  xijlain^  as  being  an 
Emmy  to  God  and  my  own  Soul  ;  and  could  not  but  hope,that 
I  had  gained  feme  Strength  againft  this,  as  well  as  other  Corrup- 
tions ;  and  felt  fome  Brokennefs  of  Heart  for  my  Sin. 

After  this,  having  perhaps  taken  fome  Cold,  I  began  to  de- 
cline as  to  bodiiy  Health  ;  and  continued  todofo,  'till  the  latter 
End  of  January^  1746,7.  And  having  a  violent  Cough,  a  con- 
fiderable  Fever,  and  ailhmatick  Diforder,  and  no  Appetite  for 
?.ny  Manner  of  Food,  nor  any  Power  of-Digeftion,  I  was  re- 
duced lo  ib  low  a  State,  that  my  Friends  (  I  believe  )  generally 
<3efpaired  of  my  Life  ;  and  fome  of  them,  for  fome  Time  toge- 
therjthought  1  could  fcarce  liveaDay  to  an  End.  In  this  Time, 
I  could  think  of  nothing  with  any  Application  of  Mind,  and 
fcemed  to  be  in  a  great  Meafure  void  of  all  AfFedien,  and  was 
exercifed  with  greatTemptaiions  s  but  yet  was  not,  ordinarily, 
afraid  of  Death. 

On  Lcrd's-Day,  Feb.  i.  Tho'  in  a  very  weak  and  lowStafe, 
I  c.7joyed  a  confiderable  deal  of  Comfort  and  Sweetnefs  in  divine 
rlTangs  -%  and  was  enabled  to  plead  and  ufe  Arguments  with 
God  in  Prayer,  I  think, with  a  Child- like  Spirit.  That  Paflage 
i^f  Scripture  occur 'd  to  laiy  Mind,  and  gave  me  greatAfiiilancc, 
J'fye,  being  Evil,  hiow  how  to  give  gocdGi/tiia  yrur  CkiBreriy 
hiiu  niuch  more  will  your  heavenly  Father  give  the  holy  Spirit  to 
thmthMtcfi  him  ?  This  Text  I  was  hclp'd  to  plead,  trd  \tS\^ 
«;^cn  ;  and  faw  the  divineFaiihfulnefs  engaged  for  dealing  with 
J5ne  better  than  any  eartkly  Parent  can  do  with  his  Child.  This 
Seafon  io  reirelh*d  my  Soul,  that  my  Body  fcem'd  alfo  to  be  a 
U;;iner  by  it.  And  from  thisTime,  I  began  gradually  to  amend. 
Aivl  as  I  recovered  fome  Strength,  Vigour  and  Spirit,  !  found 
at  Tinit3  feme  Freedom  and  Life  in  the  P^xercifcs  of  E)cvottda, 
3ni  feme  f.cni.iiia  after  Spiiituajity  and  a  Life  of  Ufcfuiii^tf*  t« 

tbu 


cf  Mr,  David  Brainerd.    A.D.  1747;    217 

the  Interefis  of  the  great  Redeemer :  Altho'  at  other  Times,  I 
was  av/fu lly  barren  and  lifelefs,  and  out  of  Frame  for  the 
Things  of  God  j  fothat  I  was  ready  often  to  cry  out.  Oh  that 
it  wen  with  me  as  in  Months  faji  I  Oh  that  God  had  taken  me 
away  in  the  midft  of  my  Ufefulnefs,  with  a  fudden  ftroke,  that 
I  might  not  have  been  under  a  neceffity  of  trifling  awayTime  ia 
Diverfions !  Oh  that  I  had  never  lived  to  fpend  fo  much  pre- 
cious Time,  in  fo  poor  a  Manner,  and  to  fo  little  Purpofs  ! 
Thus  I  often  reflected,  was  grieved,  afhamed  £nd  even  coi:- 
founied,  funk  and  difcouraged. 

On  Tuefday,  Feb,  24.  I  was  able  to  ride  as  far  as  NeiViiri^.^ 
(having  been  confined  within  EUfaheth-Town  almoft  four 
Months)  and  the  next  Day  returned  to  Elifabetb-Town.  My 
Spirits  were  fomewhat  refrefh'd  with  the  Ride,  tho'  my  Body 
was  weary. 

Oa  Saturday,  Fti,  28.  Was  vifited  by  an  Indian  of  my 
own  Congregation  ;  who  brought  me  Letters,  and  goodNe;vs 
of  the  fober  and  good  Behaviour  of  my  People,  in  general : 
This  refrefh'd  my  Soul ;  I  could  not  but  foon  retire,  and  bid's 
God  for  his  Goodnefs  5  «nd  found,  I  truft,  a  truly  thankful 
Frame  of  Spirit,  that  God  feem*d  to  be  building  up  that  Con- 
gregation for  himfelf. 

On  Wednefday»  March  4.  I  met  with  Reproof  from  a 
Friend,  which,  aitho'  I  thought  I  did  not  defcrve  it  from  him, 
yet  was  (  I  truft  )  blefs*d  of  God  to  make  me  more  tenderly 
afraid  of  Sin,  more  jealous  over  my  feJf,  and  more  concerReJ 
to  keep  both  Heart  and  Life  pure  ind  un-blameable  :  Itlikev/ife 
caufed  me  torcfle<5t  on  my  paft  Deadnefs,  and  want  c:,^  Spiritu- 
ality, and  to  abhor  my  felf,  and  look  on  my  felf  mo(t  unworthy. 
This  Frame  of  Mind  continued  the  next  Day  ^  and  for  feveraJ 
Days  after,  f  grieved,  to  think,  that  in  my  neteiTaryDiverficns 
I  had  not  maintained  more  Serioufnefs,  SolefftuJty,  heavenly 
AfFeilion  and  Converfation.  And  thus  my  Spirits  were  often 
deprefs'd  and  funk,  and  yet,  I  trufl,  that  Reproof  was  made  to 
be  beneficial  to  me. 

Wednefday,  March  ir.  Being  kept  in  Elifaheth-Town  as  a 
Day  of  Fafllng  and  Prayer,  I  was  able  to  attend  publick  Wor- 
fhip  ;  which  was  the  firftTime  I  was  able  fo  to  do  afterJO^t:.  21.. 
Oh,  how  much  Weaknefs  and  Diftrefs  did  God  carry  me  thic' 
in  this  Space  of  Time  !  But  having  obtained  Help  from  himy  1 
ycf  live  :  Oh  that  I  could  live  more  to  his  Glory. 

LordVDay,   March  15.      Was   able  again  to  attend  the 

pnblick  Wgrfbip,  and   felt  fome  carneft  Defires  of  being  re- 

F  f  2  (tor€«l 


2i8     Mt.  29:  ^^^  LIFE 

ftored  to  the  MInifterial  Work  :  Felt,  I  think,  feme  Spirit 
and  Life,  to  fpeak  for  God. 

VVednefday,  March  18.  Rode  out  with  a  Defign  to  vifit  my 
People:  And  the  next  Day  arrived  among  them  :  Was  under 
great  Dejection  in  my  Journey. 

On  Friday- Morning,  I  rofe  early,  walk'd  about  among  my 
People,  and  inquired  into  their  State  and  Concerns  ;  and  found 
sn  additional  Weight  and  Burden  on  my  Spirits,  upon  hearing 
fome  Things  difagreeable.  I  endeavour'd  to  go  to  God  with 
my  Diftrell'es,  and  made  fome  kind  of  lamentable  Complaint  ; 
and  in  a  broken  Manner  fpread  my  Difficulties  before  God  ; 
but  notwithftanding,  my  Mind  continued  very  gloomy.  About 
tea  o'clock,  I  call'd  my  People  together,  and  after  having  ex- 
plained and  fung  a  Pfalm,  I  pray'd  with  them:  There  was  a 
confiderable  deal  of  AfFedion  among  them  ;  1  doubt  not,  ia 
fome  Inftances,  that  which  was  more  than  mecrly  natural. 

[  This  was  the  lafl  Interview^  that  he  ever  had  with  his 
People.  About  II  o'clock  the  fame  Day,  he  "left 'em  ;  and 
X\iz  riext  Day,  came  to  Elifabeth-Town  ;  his  Melancholy  re- 
maining ftlil  :  And  he  continued  for  a  confiderable  Time  under 
a  great  Degree  of  Dejedion  thro'  vapoury  Diford^rs.  ] 

Saturday,  March  28.  Was  taken  this  Morning  with  violent 
5?riping  Pains.  Thefe  Pains  were  extreme,  and  conftant,  for 
feveral  Hours  ;  (o  that  it  feem'd  impoffible  for  itie,  without 
a  Miracle,  to  live  24  Hours  in  fuch  Diflrefs.  I  lay  confined 
to  my  Bed,  the  whole  Day,  and  in  diltreffing  Pain,  all  the 
^former  P;irt  of  it :  But  it  plea  fed  God  to  blefs  Means  for  the 
abatement  or  ./.y  Diftrefs.  Was  exceedingly  weakened  by  this 
Pain,  and  continued  fo  for  fevcral  Days  follov/ing  ;  beir.gex- 
ercifed  with  n'l%*ver,  Cough,  and  no*.^-iurnal  Sweats.  In  this 
liirieirvid  Cafe,  fo  long  as  my  llcdd  was  free  of  vapoury  Con- 
jufions,  Diaib  appeared  agreeable  tc  me  ;  I  look'don  it  as  the 
>£:jd  of  Trails,  and  an  Entrance  into  a  Place  whenjhe  weary 
iinairel}  ;  and,  1  think,  1  bad  fome  Rdifli  of  the  Entertain- 
fuents  of  the  heavenly  State  ;  fo  that  by  thefe  I  was  allured  and 
c'viv.'n.ai  vk'ell  as  driven  by  theFatigues  of  Life.  Oh, how  happy 
■I  ic,  u:»  be  drawn  by  Defires  of  a  State  of  perfect  Holinefs  ? 

S;;turdav,  April  :^.i  Was  funk  and  dejected,   very  reftlels  ar.-i. 
unea.) ,  Ly  Reafon  of  the  Mifimprovement  of  Tiinef  ard  ye; 
ot,  whit  to  do  :  I  longed  to  fpend  Time  in  Fading  an. 
thai  I  n-:ig!;t  i»c  ddivered  frciii  Fr-JolvnCv  nri^J  Co.'t-" 


(?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd:    A.D,  1747.     2i<) 

in  the  Things  of  God  ;  but  alas,  I  had  not  bodiJy  Strength 
for  thefe  Exercifes !  Ob,  how  blefled  a  Thing  is  it,  to  enjoy 
Peace  of  Confcience  ?  But  how  dreadful  is  a  Want  of  inward 
Peace  and  Compofure  of  Soul  !  'Tis  impoflible,  T  find,  to  en- 
joy this  Happinefs  without  redeeming  Time,  and  maintaining  a 
fpiritual  Frame  of  Mind, 

Lord's-Day,  April  ^.  It  grieved  me,  to  find  my  fdf  {q  in- 
conceivably barren.  My  Soul  thirfted  for  Grace  :  But  alas^ 
how  far  was  I  from  obtaining  what  I  faw  fo  exceeding  excellent! 
1  was  ready  to  defpair  of  ever  being  a  holy  Creature ;  and  yet 
my  Soul  wasdefirousof/o/^it//^^  hard  after  GoTt^  but  never 
did  I  fee  my  felf  fo  far  from  having  apprehended^  or  being  already 
^^r/<f^,  as  at  this  Time.  The  Lord's  Supper  being  this  Day 
adminiftred,  I  attended  the  Ordinance  :  And  tho'  I  faw  in  my 
felf  a  dreadful  Emptinefs,  and  want  of  Grace,  and  faw  my  feif 
as  it  were  at  an  infinite  Diltance  from  that  Purity,  which  is 
becoming  the  Gofpel ;  yet  in  the  Seafon  of  Communion,  efpe- 
clally  in  the  Time  of  the  Diflribution  of  the  Bread,  I  enjoyed 
fome  Warmth  of  Affedion,  and  felt  a  tender  Love  to  the  Bre* 
ihren  ;  and,  I  think,  to  the  glorious  Redeemer,  the  Firji-hom 
among  them.  I  endeavoured  then  to  bring  forth  mine  and  y?>/j 
Enemies^  and  flay  them  before  him  ;  and  found  great  Freedom  in 
begging  Deliverance  from  this  fpiritual  Death,  as  well  as  in 
allcing  divine  Favours  for  my  Friends,  and  Congregation,  and 
the  Church  of  Chrift  in  general. 

Tuefday,  April  "j.  In  the  Afternoon,  toie  to  Newark ^  in 
order  to  marry  {he  Rev.  Mr.  Dickinfon  f  ;  and  in  theEvening, 
performed  that  Work.  Afterwards,  rode  home  to  EUfaheth- 
'Towny  in  a  pleafant  Frame,  full  of  Compofure  and  Sweetnefs. 


The  late  learned  and  very  excellent  Mr.  Jonathan 
DiCKiNscfN,  Paftor  of  a  Church  in  EIifabeth-Towny?rc- 
fident  of  the  College  of  New-Jer/eyy  and  one  of  theCorref- 
pondents  of  the  honourable  Society  in  Scotland  for  propa- 
gating Chriftian  Knowledge  :  Who  had  a  great  Eftecm 
for  Mr.  Brainerdy  and  had  kindly  entertained  him  in  his 
Houfe  during  his  Sicknefs  in  the  Winter  pafl  5  and  who^ 
after  a  (hort  Illnefs,  died  in  the  next  cnfuing  OMer^  tv/o 
Days  after  Mr.  Brmsrd, 

Thui-fd^y^ 


2  20  mt.  29:        "The  LIFE 

Thurfday,  Jprtl  9.  Attended  the  Ordination  of  Mx.Tuchr^ 
and  afterwards  the  Examination  of  Mr.  Smith  :  Was  in  a  com- 
fortable Frame  of  Mind  this  Day,  and  felt  my  Heart,  1  think, 
fometimcs  in  a  fpiritual  Frame. 

Friday,  April  10.  Spent  the  Forenoon  in  Prejbyierial  Bufi- 
refs  :  In  the  Afternoon,  rode  to  Elifabeth-Town  5  found  my 
Brother  John  there  ;  %  Spent  fome  Time  in  Converfation  with 
him  ;  but  was  extreme  Weak  and  out-done,  my  Spirits  confi- 
derably  funk,  and  my  Mind  dejeded. 

Monday,  ^/>r;7  13.  Affifted  in  examining  my  Src/^^r.  In 
the  Evening,  was  in  a  folemn  devout  Frame  ;  but  was  much 
overdone  and  opprefs'd  with  a  violent  Head-ach. 

Tuefday,  April  14.  Was  able  to  do  little  or  nothing  :  Spent 
fome  Time  with  Mr.  Byram  and  other  Friends.  This  Day 
my  Brother  went  to  my  People. 

Wednefday,  April  15.  Found  fome  Freedom  at  theThrone 
of  Grace,  feveral  Times  this  Day.  In  the  Afternoon,  was  very 
weak,  and  (pent  the  Time  to  very  little  Purpofe  ;  and  yet  in 
the  Evening,  had  ( I  thought )  fome  religious  Warmth  and  fpi- 
ritual Defues  in  Prayer  :  MySoul  feem'dto  go  forth  afterGod, 
and  take  Complacence  m  bis  divine  Perfections.  But  alas, 
afterwards  awfully  letdown  my  Watch,  and  grew  carelefs  and 
fecure. 

Thurfday,  April  16.  Was  in  bitter  Anguifh  of  Soul,  in  the 
Morning,  fuch  as  I  have  fcarce  ever  felt,  with  a  Senfe  of  Sin 
and  Guilt.     I  continued  in  Dif^refs  the  whole  Day,  attempting 

to 

*  A  worthy  pious  young  Gentleman  ;  who  lived  in  theMi- 

niftry  but  a  very  fhortTime:  He  died   2it  S  tret  field  in 

Connecticut yXhtDecember  following  hisOrdination  ;  being  a 

little  v.'hile  after  Mr.  Brainerd's   Dcd^ih  2ii  Northampton* 

He  was  taken  ill  on  a  Journey, returning  from  a  Vifu  to  his 

Ffiends  at  Milton  ( in  the  Majfachufetti  )  which,  as  I  take 

it,  was  bis  native  ?hQe,?Liid Harvard- Collf^e  the  Place  of  his 

Education,. 

J  This  Brother  of  hi^had  been  fent  for  by  ihcCorrefpondents^ 

to  take  Care  of,and  inflrudl  Mr.  Brainerd's  Congregation 

of  Jndiam  ,  he  being  obliged  by  his  lllnefs  to  be   abfent 

from  them.     And  he  continued  to  take  Care  of  ihem  'till 

♦><^^   yir.  Brainerd's  Death  :  and  fmce  his  Death,  has  been  or- 

V  tlained  his  Succejfor  in  his  MifTion,  and  to  thcChargc  of  his 

Congregation  ;  which  c:)ntinues  much  to  Paurilh  undei' 

his  paftoral  C«iie. 


r/ Mr.  David Brainerd.      A.ai747;    221 

to  pray  where-evcr  I  went ;  Sc  indeed  could  not  help  (0  doing : 
but  look'd  upon  my  felf  lb  vile,  1  dared  not  look  any  Body  in  the 
Face ;  and  was  even  grieved,  that  any  Body  fliould  fliew  me 
a'ny  Refpedl:,  or  at  leaft,  that  they  fliould  be  fo  deceived  as  to 
think  I  deferved  it. 

Friday,  Jpril  17.  In  the  Evening,  could  not  but  think^that 
God  helped  me  to  araw  near  to  the  Throne  of  Grace ^  tho'  moft 
unworthy,  and  gave  me  a  Senfe  of  his  Favour  ;  which  gave  me 
inexprefiibleSupport  andEncouragement ;  tho'  I  fcarc^ily  dared 
to  hope  the  Mercy  was  real,  it  appear'd  io  great  :  Ytr  could 
not  but  rejoyce,  that  ever  God  fhould  difcover  his  reconciled 
;^?^jjFace  to  fuch  a  vile  Sinner.  Shame  and  Confufion,  at  Timetv^ 
tover'd  me ;  and  then  Hope  and  Joy  and  Admiration  of  divine 
Gobdnefs  gain'd  the  Afcendant.  Sometimes  I  could  not  but 
admire  the  divine  Goodnefs,  that  the  Lord  had  not  let  me  fall 
intoall  the  grofleft  vileft  A6I3  of  Sin  and  open  Scandal,  that 
could  be  thought  of ;  and  it\X.  my  felf  {0  neccllitated  to  praife 
God,  that  this  was  ready  for  a  little  while  to  fwallow  up  my 
Shame  andPreflure  of  Spirit  on  Account  of  my  Sins. 

[  After  this,  hisDeje£lion  and  PrefTure  of  Spirit  returned  % 
and  he  remained  under  it  the  two  next  Days.  J 

Monday,  April  20.  "Was  in  a  very  difordered  State, and  kept 
my  Bed  moft  of  the  Day.  I  enjoyed  a  little  more  Comfort, than 
in  feveral  of  the  preceeding  Daj/s.  This  Day  I  arrived  at  th'j 
Age  of  29  Years. 

Tuefday,  Jprilii.  I  {zi  out  on  my  Journey  for  Neiu-Eng- 
Jcndy  in  order  (if  it  might  be  the  Will  of  God  )  to  recover 
my  Health  by  riding :  Travelled  to  NewTcrk^  and  there 
lodged. 

[  This  proved  his  final  Departure  from  New- J er fey, 

He  travelled  flowly,  and  arrived  among  his  Friends  at  Iio/i- 
Haddam,  about  the  beginning  of  Ulay.  There  is  very  little  Ac- 
count in  his  Diary y  of  the  Time  that  pafsM  from  hisfetting  out 
on  this  Journey  to  May  10.  He  fpeaks  of  his  fomctimes  hnd- 
inghis  Heart  rejoicing  in  theglorious  Pcrftdlions  of  God,  iind 
knping  to  live  to  him  j  but  complains  of  the  Unfixcdnefs  of 
lisTho'ts,  and  their  beinor^afily  diverted  from  divine  Subjecii- 
■^nJ  cries  out  of  his  Lcannefs,  as  teitifying  againfi  him,  in  'Le 
i  indeti:  Manner.  And  concerning  ihofe  Dhcrficm  he  was  ch/* 
iijcJ  to  ufe  for  bio  HcaUh,  he  fays,  that  hei^^mctimss  found  he 

couM 


222    Mt.^0.  TX^^LIFE 

could  ufe  Diverfions  XVith  ftngknefs  of  Hearty  aiming  at  the 
Glory  of  God  ;  but  that  he  alfo  found  there  was  a  Neceflity 
of  great  Care  and  Watchfulnefs,  left  he  fhould  lofe  that  fpiri- 
tual  Temper  of  Mind  in  his  Diverfions,  and  left  they  ftiould 
degenerate  into  what  was  meerly  fcliifli,  without  any  fupreme 
Aim  at  the  G\oty  of  God  in  them.  ] 

LordVDay,  May  lo.  (At  Had-Lime)  I  could  not  but 
feel  fomeMcafure  of  Gratitude  to  God  at  thisTime  (wherein  I 
was  much  exercifed  )  that  he  had  always  difpofed  me,  in  myMi- 
niftry,to  infift  on  the  great  Doflrines  of  Regeneration^  the  New* 
Creature^  Faith  in  Chrijl^  progrejjive  Sanctification^  fupreme  Love 
U  God,  living  intirely  to  the  Glory  of  Gody  being  not  our  own,  and 
the  like :  God  has  helped  me  to  fee,  in  the  fureft  Manner, 
from  Time  to  Time,  that  thefe,  and  the  likeDo£lrines,neceira- 
rily  connedled  with  them,  are  the  only  Foundation  of  Safety  and 
Salvation  for  perifhing  Sinners  ;  and  that  thofe  divine  Difpofi- 
tions,  v/hich  are  confonant  hereto,  are  that  Holinefs,  without 
which  no  Manjhallfee  the  Lord  :  The  Exercife  of  thefeGod-like 
Tempers,  wherein  the  Soul  a6ls  in  a  kind  of  Concert  with  God, 
and  would  be  and  do  every  Thing  that  is  pleafing  to  God  ; 
This,  I  faw,  would  ftand  by  the  Soul  in  a  dying  Hour  ;  For 
God  muft,  I  think,  deny  Himfelf,  if  he  cafts  away  /;/;  own  Imager 
even  the  Soul  that  is  one  in  Defires  with  himfelf. 

LordVDay,  May  i^j.  (At  Millington  )  Spent  the  Forenoon 
at  Home, being  unable  to  attend  the  pubh'ck  Wbrfhip.  At  this 
Time,  God  gave  me  fome  afFedling  Senfe  of  my  own  Vile- 
uefs,  and  the  exceeding  Sinfulnefs  of  my  Heart ;  that  there 
i"eem*d  to  be  Nothing  but  Sin  and  Corruption  within  me.  Innu- 
merable Evils  compafi^dme  about ;  my  want  of  Spirituality  and 
holy  livmg,  my  negledof  God, and  living  to  my  felf -—  All  the 
Abominations  of  my  Heart  and  Life  feem'd  to  be  open  to  my 
View  ;  and  I  had  nothing  to  fay,  but,  God  he  tnercifulio  me 

e  Sinner* TowardsNoon,  I  faw,lhatiheGrace  of  God  in 

Chrift  is  infinitely  free  towards  Sinners,  and  fuch  Sinners  as  I 
was  ;  I  alfo  faw,  that  God  is  the  fupream  Good,  that  in  his 
Prefence  is  Life  ;  and  1  began  to  long  to  die,  that  I  might 
be  with  h:m,  in  a  ftate  of  Freedom  from  all  Sin.  Oh,  how  a 
fmnli  Ghm^jfc  of  his  Excellency  refrefh'd  my  Soul  I  Oh,hov/ 
worthy  i«;thebleflbd  God  to  be  loved, adored,  and  delighted  in, 
fer  himfelf,  for  his  own  divine  Excellencies. 

Tho'  I  fcit  much  Dulnefs,  and  want  of  a  Spirit  of  Pi H;C-  , 
this  VVetlc  :'  Yet  I  bad  fomc  Glimpfcs  of  the  Excellency    ct 


cf  Mr.  David  Brainerd.      A.D.  1 747.     223 

divine  Things  ;  and  efpecially  one  Morning,  in  fecret  Medita- 
tion and  Prayer,  the  Excellency  and  Beauty  of  Holinefs,  as  a 
Likenefs  to  the  glorious  God,  was  fo  difcovered  tome,  that  I 
began  to  long  earneftly  to  be  in  that  World  where  Holinefs 
dwells  in  Perfe6tion  :  And  I  feem'd  to  long  for  this  perfe6t 
Holinefsjnot  fo  much  for  the  fake  of  my  own  Happinefs  (altho* 
I  faw  clearly  that  this  was  the  greateft,  yea, the  only  Happinefs 
of  the  Soul )  as  that  I  might  pleafe  God,  live  intirely  to  him, 
and  glorify  him  to  the  utmoft  Stretch  of  my  rational  Powers 
and  Capacities. 

Lord's-Day,  iT^<7y  24.  (  At  Long- Meadow  in  Springfield) 
Could  not  but  think,  as  I  have  often  remark'd  to  others,  that 
much  more  of  true  Religion  confifts  in  deep  Humility^  Brokenneft 
of  Hearty  and  an  aiafing  Senfe  of  Barrennefs  and  zu ant  of  Grace 
and  Holinefiy  thaa  moft  who  are  called  C^r//?/tf»/,  imagine  ; 
efpecially  thofe  who  have  been  efteemed  the  Converts  of  thb 
late  Day  ;  many  of  whom  feem  to  know  of  no  other  Religion 
but  elevated  Joys  and  JffeSiions^  arifing  only  from  fome  Flights 
of  Imagination ^or  fome  Su^gejiion  made  to  theirMind,  of  Cbri/i's 
being  iheir'syGod's  loving  them^  and  the  like. 

[  On  Thurfday,  May  28.  He  came  from  Long-Meadow  to 
Northampton  ;  appearing  vaftly  better  than,  by  his  Account, 
he  had  been  in  the  Winter  ;  indeed  (o  well,  that  he  was  able  to 
ride  25  Miles  in  a  Day, and  to  walk  half  a  Mile  ;  and  appeared 
chearful,  and  free  from  Melancholy  :  But  yet  undoubtedly, 
at  that  Time,  in  a  confirmed,  incurable  Confumption. 

I  had  had  much  Opportunity,  before  this,of  particular  Infor- 
mation concerning  him,  from  many  that  were  well  acquainted 
with  him ;  and  had  my  felf  once  anOpportunity  of  confidcrable 
Converfation  and  fome  Acquaintance  with  h\rci^2ithJew-Havenf 
near  four  Years  before,  in  the  Time  of  the  Commencement  when 
he  offered  that  Confeflion  to  the  Redtor  of  the  College,  that 
has  been  already  mentioned  in  this  Hiftory  ;  I  being  one  he  was 
pleafed  then  feveral  Times  to  confult  on  that  Affair  :  But  now 
I  had  Opportunity  for  a  more  full  Acquaintance  with  him.  I 
found  him  remarkably  fociable,pleafant,  and  entertaining  in  his 
Converfation  ;  yet  folid,  favoury,  fpiritual,  and  very  profitable  ; 
appearing  meek,  modeft,  and  humble,  far  from  any  StifFnefs, 
Morofenefs,  fuperflitious  Deraurcnefs,  or  affedled  Sinp;ularity 
in  Speech  orBehaviour,and  feeming  to  naufeate  all  fuch  Things. 
We  enjoyed  not  only  the  Benefit  of  his  Converfation,  but  had 
the  Comfort  and  Advantage  of  hearing  him  pray  in  thcFamily* 

G  g  (torn 


324    ^t,  30.  «^  L  I  F  E 

from  Time  to  Time.  His  Manner  of  praying'  was  very  agre- 
able';  moft  becoming  a  Worm  of  the  Duft,  and  a  Difciple  of 
Chrift,  addrelling  to  an  infinitely  great  and  holy  God,  and  Fa- 
ther of  Mercies  ;  qot  with  florid  Expreffions,  or  a  ftudy'd  Elo- 
quence ;  net  with  any  intemperate  Vehemence,  or  indecent 
Boldncfs ;  at  the  greateft  Diftance  from  any  Appearance  of 
Oftentation,  and  from  every  Thing  that  might  look  as  tho'  he 
meant  to  recommend  himfelf  to  thofe  that  were  about  him,or  fet 
himfelf  off  to  their  Acceptance ;  free  too  from  vainRcpetitions, 
without  impertinentExcurfionSjOr  needlefs  multiplying  of  Words. 
Heexprefled  himfelf  with  the  ftriaeft  Propriety,  with  Weight, 
and  Pungency  ;  and  yet  what  his  Lips  uttered  feem'd  to  flow 
from  i\\tfulngf$  ofh'n  Hearty  as  deeply  imprefled  with  a  great 
and  folemn  Senfe  of  our  NeceflTities,  Unworthinefs,  and  Depen- 
dance,  and  of  God's  infinite  Greatnefs,  Excellency  and  Sufli- 
ciency,  rather  than  meerly  from  a  warm  and  fruitful  Brain, 
pouring  out  good  Expreflions.  And  I  know  not,  that  ever  I 
heard  him  fo  much  as  a(k  a  Bleflin^  or  return  Thanks  at  Table, 
but  there  was  fomething  remarkable,  to  be  obferved  both  in  the 
Matter  and  Manner  of  the  Performance.  In  his  Prayers,  he 
infifled  much  on  the  Profperity  of  Z/fl»,  the  Advancement  of 
Chrifl'^s  Kingdom  in  the  World,  and  the  Flouriftiing  and  Pro- 
pagation of  Religion  among  the  Indians^  And  he  generally 
made  it  one  Petition  in  his  Prayer,/^fl/  we  might  not  out-live  our 
Ufefulnefs,} 

Lord's- Day,  May  31.  [At  Northampton^']  I  had  little  inward 
Sweetnefs  in  Religion,  moft  of  the  Week  paft  ;  not  realifing 
and^1)eholding  fpiritually  thcGlory  ofGod^andthe  bleJJedRedeemer  ; 
from  whence  always  arife  my  Comforts  and  Joys  in  Religion,  if 
I  have  any  at  all :  And  if  I  can't  fo  behold  the  Excellencies  and 
Perfedtions  of  God,  as  to  caufe  me  to  rejoyce  in  him  for  what 
he  is  in  himfelf^  I  have  no  folidFoundation  forjoy.  To  rejoyce, 
only  becaufe  I  apprehend  I  have  an  IntereflinChriJiy  and  fhall 
be  finally  faved,  is  a  poor  mean  Bufinefs  indeed. 

[  This  Week,  he  confulted  Dr.  Mather^  at  my  Houfe,  con- 
cerning hjs  IJlnefa  ;  who  plainly  told  him,  that  there  were  great 
Evidences  of  his  being  in  a  confirmed  Confumption^  and  that 
he  could  give  him  no  Encouragement,  that  he  fhould  ever  re- 
Corer.  But  it  feemed  not  to  occafion  the  lead  Difcompofure 
in  him,  nor  to  make  any  Manner  of  Alteration  as  to  theChear- 
futncfs  and  Serenity  of  his  Mind^  or  the  Freedom  or  Plcafant- 
riefsofhis  Converfation.j 

LordVDay, 


c/ Afr.  David  Brainerd;     A.  D.  1747;     225 

Lord'S'Day,  June  7.  My  Attention  was  greatly  engaged, 
and  my  Soul  fo  drawn  forth,  this  Day,  by  what  I  heard  of  the 
exceeding  Precioujntfs  of  the  faying  Grace  of  God*s  Splrity  that  it 
almoft  overcame  my  Body,  in  my  weak  State :  I  faw,  "that  true 
Grace  is  exceeding  precious  indeed  5  that  it  is  very  rare  5  and 
that  there  is  but  a  very  fmall  Degree  of  it,  even  where  the 
Reality  of  it  is  to  be  found  j  at  leaft,  I  faw  this  to  be  my  Cafe. 

In  the  preceeding  Week,  I  enjoyed  fome  comfortable  Seafons 
of  Meditation.  One  Morning,  the  Caufe  of  God  appeared 
exceeding  precious  to  me  :  The  Redeemer'sKingdom  is  all  that 
is  valuable  in  the  Earth,  and  I  could  not  but  long  for  the  Pro- 
motion of  it  in  the  World  :  I  faw  alfo,  that  this  Caufe  is  God's, 
that  he  has  an  infinitely  greater  Regard  and  Concern  for  it, 
than  I  could  poiTibly  have  ;  that  if  I  have  any  true  Love  to  this 
blefled  Intereft,  it  is  only  a  Drop  derives^  from  that  Ocean. 
Hence,  I  wa?  ready  to  lift  up  my  Head  with  Joy  j  and  ct)nclude, 
TVelly  ifGod^s  Caufe  hefo  dear  and  precious  to  him,  he  will  promote 
it.  And  thus  I  did  as  it  were  reft  on  God,that  furely  he  would 
promote  that  which  was  fo  agreable  to  his  own  will  ;  tho'  the 
Time,  when,  muft  ftill  be  left  to  his  fovereign  Fleafure. 

[  He  was  advifed  by  Phyficians  flill  to  continue  Riding,  as 
what  would  tend,  above  any  other  Means,  to  prolong  his  Life. 
He  was  at  a  Lofs,  for  fomeTime,  which  Way  to  bend  hisCourfe 
next  ;  but  finally  determined  to  ride  from  hence  to  Boflon  ;  we 
having  concluded  that  One  of  this  Family  fhould  go  with  him, 
and  be  helpful  to  him  in  his  weak  and  low  State.  ] 

Tuefday,  June  9.  I  fet  out  on  a  Journey  from  Northampton 
to  Bofion  :  Travelled  (lowly,  and  got  fome  Acquaintance  with 
divers  Minifters  on  the  Road. 

I  having  now  continued  to  ride  for  fome  confiderable  Time 
together,  felt  my  felf  much  better  than  I  bad  formerly  done  ; 
and  I  found,  that  in  Proportion  to  the  Profpeft  I  had  of  beini» 
wftored  to  a  State  of  Ufefulnefs,  fo  Idefired  ths  Continuance 
of  Life  :  But Z)^«/^  appeared  inconceivably  more  defirable  to 
me,  than  a  ufelefs  Life  ;  yet  blefled  be  God,  I  found  my  Heart, 
at  Times,  fully  refigned  and  reconciled  to  this  greateft  of  Af- 
flictions, if  God  faw  fit  thus  to  deal  with  me. 

Friday,  June  12.  I  arrived  in  Bo/Ion  this  Day,  fome  what  fa- 
tigued with  my  Journey.  Obferved,  that  there  is  no  Reji,  but 
in  God  :  Fatigues  of  Body,  and  Anxieties  of  Mind  attend  us, 
both  in  Town  and  Country  ;  no  Plaee  is  exempted. 

G  g  2  Lord's-Day^ 


liS      JEl  30:  315^  L  I  F  E 

Lord's-Day,  Junei^.  I  enjoyed  fome  Enlargement  &Sweet- 
nefs  in  Family-Prayer,  as  well  as  in  fecrct  Exercifes ;  Godap- 
pcar'J  excellent,  his  Ways  full  of  Pieafure  and  Peace,  and  all 
I  wanted  was  a  Spirit  of  holy  Fervency,  to  live  to  him. 

Wednefday,  yune  17.  This,  and  the  two  proceeding  Days, 
I  fpent  mainly  in  vifiting  the  Minifters  of  the  Town,  and  was 
treated  with  great  RefpecS:  by  them. 

On  Thurfday,ytt«^  18. 1  was  taken  exceeding  ill,and  bro't  to 
the  Gates  of  Death, by  the  breaking  of  fmallUlcers  in  my  Lungs, 
as  my  Phyfician  fappofed.  In  this  extreme  weak  State  I  conti- 
nued for  feveral  Weeks,  and  was  frequently  reduced  fo  low,  as 
to  be  utterly  Specchlefs,  and  not  able  To  much  as  to  whifper  a 
Word  ;  and  even  after  I  had  fo  far  revived,  as  to  walk  about 
Houfe,  and  to  ftep  out  of  Doors,  I  was  exercifed  every  Day 
with  a  faint  Turn,  which  continued  ufually  four  or.  fiveHours; 
at  which  Times,  tho'  I  was  not  utterly  Speechlefs,  fo  but  that 
I  could  fay  Yes  or  No,  yet  I  could  not  converfe  at  all,  nor  fpeak 
nne  Sentence  without  making  Stops  for  Breath  ;  and  divers 
Times  in  this  Seafon,  my  Friends  gathered  round  my  Bed,  to 
fee  me  breathe  my  laft,  which  they  look'd  for  every  Moment, 
as  I  my  felf  alfo  did. 

How  I  was,  the  firft  Day  or  two  of  ifiy  Illnefs,withRegard  to 
the  Exercifeof  Reafcriy  I  fcarcely  know  ;  but  I  believe  I  was 
fomething  fhatter'd  with  tha  Violence  of  the  Fever,  at  Times  : 
But  the  third  Day  of  my  Illnefs,  and  conftantly  afterwards,  for 
four  or  five  Weeks  together,  { enjoyed  as  much  Serenity  of 
lVlind,and  Clearnefsof  ThoMght,  as  perhaps  I  ever  did  in  my 
Life  ;  and  I  think,  my  Mind  never  penetrated  with  fo  much 
Eafe  and  Freedom  into  divine  Things,  as  at  this  Time  ;  and 
I  never  felt  fo  capable  of  demonftrating  the  Truth  of  many  im- 
portant Dc6l.  ines  of  the  Gofpel  as  now.  And  as  I  faw  clearly 
the  Truth  ct^  thofe  great  DocSlrines,  which  are  juftly  ftiled  the 
DOCTRINES  of  GRACE  ;  fo  I  faw  with  no  lefs  Clearnefs, 
that  the  Ejfence  di  Religion  coniifted  in  the  SouPs  Conformity  to 
God,  and  ading  above  all  felfifli  Views,  for  his  Glory ^  longing 
to  be  for  him,  to  W^o.  to  him,  and  pleafe  and  honour  him  in  all 
Things  ;  and  this  from  a  clear  View  of  his  infinite  Excellency 
andWorthinefsi'^  hinjelf,  to  be  loved,  adored,  worfhipped,and 
ferved  by  all  infel'igcnt  Creatures.  Thus  I  faw,that  when  a  Soul 
loveiGod  with  a  fuprcme  Love,  he  therein  adts  like  the  blelled 
God  himfctlf,  who  mod  juflly  loves  himfelf  in  that  Manner : 
So  when  God's  Intcrefi:  and  his  arc  become  one,  and  he  longs 
h?,t  God  Ihoald  be ^/cr/y?^^;   aqi  rejoyccs   to  think  that  he  is 

'  ^achangs7ib!y 


<?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.         A.D.1747.  227 

unchangeably  pofTefs'd  of  the  hig;hcft  Glory  and  BlefTednefs, 
herein  alfo  he  a6ls  InConformity  toGodiln  likeManner,when  ihe 
Soul  is  fully  refigned  tOy  and  refts  fatisfied  and  contented  with  the 
divine  Will,  here  it  is  alfo  conformed  to  God. 

I  faw  further,  that  as  this  divine  Temper,  whereby  the  Soul 
jcxalts  God,  and  treads  Self  in  theDuft,  is  wrought  in  the  Soul 
by  God's  difcovering  his  own  glorious  Perfedions  in  ihe  Faci 
tf  Jefus  Chrifi  to  it,  by  the  fpecial  Influences  of  the  holy  Spirit, 
fo  he  cannot  but  have  Regard  to  it,  as  his  own  Work  ;  and  as 
it  is  his  Image  in  the  Soul,  he  cannot  but  take  Delight  in  it. 
Then  I  faw  again,  that  if  God  (hould  flight  and  rejedl  his  own 
moral  Image,  he  muft  needs  deny  him/elf;  which  he  cannot  do. 
And  thus  I  faw  the  Stability  and  Infallibility  of  this  Religionjand 
that  thofe  who  are  truly  pofTefs'd  of  it,  have  the  moft  compleat 
and  fatisfying  Evidence  of  their  being  interefted  in  all  the  Be- 
nefits of  Chrift's  Redemption,  having  their  Hezvts  conformed  to 
him ;  and  that  thefe  and  thefconly  are  qualified  for  the  Employ- 
ments andEntertainments  of  God'sKingdom  of  Glory  ;  as  none 
but  thefe  have  any  Relifh  for  the  Bufinefs  of  Heaven,  which  is 
to  afcribe Glory  to  God,  and  not  to  themfelves ;  and  that  God 
jf  tho'  I  would  fpeak  it  with  great  Reverence  of  his  Name  and 
Perfedions)  cannot,  without  denying  himfclf,  finally  caft  fuclj 
away. 

The  next  Thing  I  had  then  to  do,  was  to  enquire,  whether 
ibis  was  my  Religion  :  And  here  God  was  pleafed  to  help  me  to 
the  moft  eafy  Remembrance  and  critical  Review  of  what  had 
pafs'd  in  Courfe,  of  a  religious  Nature,  thro'  feveral  of  the  lat- 
ter Years  of  my  Life  :  And  ahho'  I  could  difcover  much  Cor- 
ruption attending  my  bell  Duties,  many  felfifh  Views  and  car- 
nal Ends,  much  fpiritual  Pride  and  Self-Exaltation,  and  in- 
numerable other  Evils  which  conapSfs'd  me  about ;  1  fay,altho' 
I  now  difcerned  the  Sins  of  my  holy  Things,  as  well  as  other 
Anions, yet  God  was  pleafed,  as  I  was  reviewing, quickly  to  put 
this  Queftion  out  of  Doubt,  by  {hewing  me,  that  I  had,  from 
Time  to  Tirpe,  a6^ed  above  the  utmoft  fnfluence  of  meer  Self- 
Love  ;  that  I  had  longed  to  pleafe  and  glorify  him, as  my  higheft 
Happinefs,  (^c.  And  this  Review  was  thro'  Grace  attended 
with  a  prefent  Feeling  of  the  fame  divine  Temper  of  Mind  ;  I 
felt  now  pleafed,  to  think  of  the  Glory  of  God,  and  longed  for 
Heaven,  as  a  State  wherein  I  might  glorify  God  perfe<91y>  r^' 
ther  than  a  Place  of  Happinefsfor  my  felf  :  And  this  Feeling  ^f 
the  Love  of -God  in  my  Heart,  which  1  trufl  the  Spirit  of  ^cd 
ezcited  ir.  me  afrs&j  was  fufficieht  to  giv^me  full  Satisfadlion, 


228     ^/.  30.  ^he  LIFE 

and  make  me  Iong,as  I  had  many  Times  before  done,to  be  with 
Chrift  :  I  did  not  now  want  any  of  the  fudden  Suggejiiom ^vihioh 
many  arc  fo  pleafed  whh^That  Chri/i  and  his  Benefits  or^MiNE, 
That  God  laves  Me,  ^c.  in  order  to  give  me  Satisfadion  about 
my  State:  No,  my  Soul  now  abhor'd  thofeDelufionsof  5<2/<2i?, 
which  are  thought  to  be  the  immediauWiinefs  of  the  Spirit  ^whWe 
ti  ere  is  nothing  but  an  empty  Sugge/iion  of  aceriainFacSljWithout 
any  gracious  Difcovery  of  the  divine  Glory,  or  of  the  Sf  iritis 
Work  in  their  ownHearts :  I  faw  the  awfulDelufion  of  this  Kind 
of  Confidences,  as  well  as  of  the  whole  of  that  Religion,  which 
they  ufuaily  fpring  from,  or  at  ieaft  are  the  Attendants  of ;  the 
falfe  Religion  of  the  late  Day  f  tho*  a  Day  of  wondrousGrace) 
the  Imaginations,  and  Impreffions  made  only  on  the  animal 
AflFedions,  together  with  the  fudden  Suggcftions,  made  to 
the  Mind  by  Satan,  transformed,  into  an  Angel  of  Light,  of  cer- 
tain Fa(3s  not  revealed  in  Scripture  :  Thefe,  and  many  like 
Things,  I  fear,  have  made  up  the  greater  Part  of  the  religious 
Appearances  in  many  Places. 

Thefe  Things  I  faw  with  great  Clearnefs,  when  I  was  tho't 
to  be  dying.  And  God  gave  me  great  Concern  for  his  Church 
and  Intereft  in  the  World,  fat  this  Time  :  Not  fo  much  bccaufc 
the  late  remarkable*  Influence  upon  the  Minds  of  People  was 
abated,  and  almoft  wholly  gone,  as  becaufe  that  falfe  Religion, 
thofc  Heats  of  Imagination,  and  wild  and  felfifh  Commotions 
of  the  animal  AfFedlions,  which  attended  the  Work  of  Grace, 
had  prevailed  fo  far.  This  was  that  which  my  Mind  dwelt  up- 
on, almoft  Day  and  Night :  And  this,  to  me,  was  the  darkeft 
Appearance,  refpcding  Religion,  in  the  Land  ;  for  'twas  this 
chiefly,  that  had  prejudiced  the  World  againft  inward  Religion. 
And  I  faw,  the  great  Mifer]^of  all  was,  thatfo  few  faw  any  Man- 
ner of  Difference  between  thofe  Exercifes  that  were  fpiritual  and 
holy,  and  thofe  which  have  Self-Love  only  for  their  Beginning, 
Center,  and  End. 

As  God  was  pleafed  to  afford  me  Clearnefs  of  Thought,  and 
Compofure  of  Mind,  almoft  continually,  for  feveral  Weeks 
togcther,under  my  grcatWeaknefs  ;  fo  he  enabled  me^  in  fome 
Meafure,  to  improve  my  Time  (  as  i  hope  )  to  valuable  Pur- 
pofes.  1  was  enabled  to  write  a  Number  of  important  L^//^rj, 
iQ  Friends  in  remote  Places  *  :  And  fometimes  I  wrote  when 


Among  thefe  are  the  eighth',  ninth,  and  tenth  Letters,  at 

ifee  ]i\\Qi  of  this  Hiftory. 


of  Mr.  David  Bralnerd.    A.D.  1747.     229 

I  was  Speechlefs ;  i.  e.  unable  to  maintain  Converfation  with 
any  Body  ;  tho*  perhaps  I  was  able  to  fpeak  a  Word  or  two  Co 
as  to  be  heard. —  At  this  Seafon  alfo,  while  I  was  confined  aS 
Bojlon^  I  read  with  Care  and  Attention  fome  Papers  of  old  Mr. 
Skepard's^  lately  come  to  Light,  and  defigaed  for  the  Prefs  : 
And  as  I  was  defired,  and  greatly  urged,  made  fomeCorredlions, 
where  the  Senfe  was  left  dark,  for  want  of  a  Word  or  two.— 
Befides  this,  I  had  many  Viftiarrtsi  with  whom,  when  I  was 
able  to  fpeak,  I  always  converfed  of  the  Things  of  Religion  ; 
and  was  peculiarly  difpofed  and  aflifted  in  diftinguifhing  between 
the  true  and  falfe  Religion  of  theTimes :  There  was  fcarce  any 
Subject:,  that  has  been  Matter  of  Debate  in  the  late  Day,  but 
what  I  was  at  one  Time  or  other  brought  to  a  Sort  of  Neceffity 
to  difcourfe  upon,  and  fhew  myOpinion  in  ;  and  that  frequently 
beforeNumbers  of  People  ;  and  efpecially,Idifcourfed  repeatedly 
on  the  NatureandNeceifityof  that  Humiliation's  elf-  Emptinefs^ 
or  full  Conviction  of  a  Perfon's  being  utterly  undone  in  himfclf, 
which  is  neceiTary  in  order  to  a  faving  Faith,  and  the  extreme 
Difficulty  of  being  brought  to  this,  and  the  great  Danger  thste 
isofPerfons  taking  up  with  (owtS  elf -righteous  Appearances  of  it : 
The  Danger  of  this  I  efpecially  dwelt  uponjbeingperfwaded  that 
Multitudes  perifh  in  this  hidden  Way  ;  and  becaufe  fo  little  is 
faid  from  moft  Pulpits  to  difcovcr  any  Danger  here  :  So  that 
Perfons  being  never  effe£lually  brought  to  die  in  themfelves, 
are  never  truly  united  to  Chrift,  and  fo  perifh.*  I  alfo  difcourfed 
much  on  what  I  take  to  be  the  EfTence  of  true  Religion,  endea- 
vouring plainly  to  defcribc  that  God-like  Temper  and  Difpofi- 
tion  of  Soul,  and  that  holy  Converfation  and  Behaviour,  that 
may  juftly  claim  the  Honour  of  having  God  for  its  Original 
and  Patron.  And  I  have  Reafon  to  hope  God  bleifed  my  Way 
ofdifcourfing  and  diftinguifliing,  to  fome,  both  Miniftcrs  and 
People  ;  fo  that  my  Time  was  not  wholly  loft. 

[  He  was  much  vifited,  while  in  Bo/Ion^  by  many  Perfons  of 
confiderable  Note  and  Figure,  and  of  the  beft  CharaCler,  and  by 
fome  of  the  firftRank:  Who  {hewed  him  uncommon  Refpefi-, 
and  appeared  highly  pleafed  and  entertained  with  hisConverfatioR, 
And  befides  his  being  honoured  with  the  Company  and  Rerpe<^.t 
of  Miniftefs  of  the  Town,  he  was  vifited  by  feveral  Mi- 
nifters  from  various  Parts  of  the  Country.  And  as  he  took 
all  Opportunities  to  difcourfe  ofthe  peculiar  Nature,  and  diftin- 
guifhing Characters  of  true  fpiritual  and  vital  Religion,  ^od  to 
bear  his  Teftiraony  againft  the  rarious  falfe  Appearances  of  it, 
-  confillin^ 


X3P      ^A  2>^'  ^he  LIFE 

confifting  in, or  arifing  from  Imprellions  on  the  Imaginationjand 
fudden  and  fuppofed  immediate  Suggeftions  of  Truths,  not 
contained  in  theScripture,  and  thatFaith  which  confifts  primarily 
in  a  Perfon's  believing  that  Chrtfi  died  for  him  in  particuiar,Sic, 
So  what  he  faid  was  for  the  moft  Part  heard  with  uncommon 
Attention  and  Regard  ;  and  his  Difcourfes  and  Reafonings  ap- 
peared manifeftly  to  have  great  Weight  and  Influence,  with 
many  thatheconverfed  with,  both  Minifters  and  others.* 

Alfo  the  Honourable  Commiflioners  in  Ba/ion^  of  the  incor- 
porated Society  in  London  for  propagating  the  Gofpel  in  New^ 
England  and  Parts  adjacent, having  newly  had  committed  to  'em 
a  Legacf  of  the  late  Rev.  and  famous  Dr.  Daniel  IVilliami  of 
London^  for  the  Support  oUwo  Mijfionariei  to  the  Heathen,  were 
pleafed,  while  he  was  in  Boflon^  to  confult  him  about  a  Miflion 
to  thofe  Indian:  called  the  Six  Nations,  particularly  about  the 
Qualifications  requifite  in  a  Miflionary  to  thofe  Indians ;  and 
were  fo  fatisfied  with  his  Sentiments  on  this  Head,  and  had 
that  Confidence  in  bis  Faithfulnefs  and  his  Judgment  and  Dif- 
cretion  in  Things  of  this  Nature,  that  they  defired  him  to  under- 
take to  find  and  recommend  a  couple  of  Perfons  fit  to  be  employed 
in  this  Bufmefs  ;  and  very  much  left  the  Matter  with  him. 

Likewife  certain  pious  and  generoufly  difpofed  Gentlemen  in 
Bo/ion,  being  moved  by  the  wonderful  Narrative  of  his  Labours 
and  Succefs  among  the  Indians,  in  New-Jerfey,  and  more  efpeci- 
ally  by  their  Converfation  with  him  on  the  fame  Subje6l,  took 
Opportunity  to  enquire  more  particularly  into  the  State  and 
Necellities  of  his  Congregation,  and  the  School  among  the  7/7- 
dians,  with  a  charitable  Intention  of  contributing  fomething  of 
iheir  Subfhnce  to  promote  the  excellent  Defign  of  the  Advance- 
ment of  the  Interefts  of  Chriftianity  among  the  Indians  ;  and 
underftanding  that  there  was  a  want  of  Bibles  for  theSchool, three 
Dozen  of  Bibles  were  immediately  procured,  and  14/,'.  in  Bills 
(  of  the  old  Tenour  )  given  over  and  above,  befides  more  large 
Benefactions  made  afterwards,  which  I  fhall  have  Occafion  to 
mention  in  their  proper  Place. 


I  have  had  Advantage  for  the  more  full  Information  of  his 
ConducSt  and  Converfation,  the  Entertainment  he  met  with, 
and  what  pafs*d  relating  to  him  while  in  Bo/lon  ;  as  he  was 
confhntly  attended,  during  his  Continuance  there,  by  one 
of  my   Children,  in  order  to  his  Afliftancc  in  his  likcfs. 


of  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  ij^^j'.     231 

Mr.  Braimrd's  Reftoration  from  his  extreamly  low  State  m 
Bo/Icrty  fo  as  to  go  abroad  again  and  to  travel,  was  very  unex- 
peaed  to  him  and  his  Friends.  My  Daughter  who  was  with  him, 
writes  thus  concerning  him, in  a  Letter  dated  Ja^^  ji  j.  << 
«<  OiiThurrday,he  was  very  ill  with  a  violen*  Fever,  &  extreme 
<<  Pain  in  his  Head  and  Breaftjand,  at  Turns,  c'elirious.  So  he 
« «  remained  'till  Saturday Evening,when  he  feem'd  to  be  in  the 
<c  Agonies  of  Death  :  The  Family  was  up  with  him  *till  one 
«  or  two  o'clock,  expefling  every  Hour  would  be  his  laft.  On 
<<  Sabbath  Day  he  was  a  little  revived,  his  Head  was  better, 
<<  but  very  full  of  Pain,and  exceeding  fore  at  his  Breaft,  much 
««  put  to  it  for  Breath  &c.  Yefterday  he  was  better  upon  all 
<«  Accounts.  Laft  Night  he  flcpt  but  little.  This  Morning 
««  he  is  much  worfe.  Do^koxPynchon  fays,he  has  noHopes 

«'  of  his  Life  ;  nor  does  he  think  it  likely  he  will  ever  come 
*«  out  of  the  Chamber  ;  tho*  he  fays,  he  may  be  able  to  come 
*'  to  Nsrthampton,' 

In  another  Letter  dated  June  29.  She  fays  as  follows.  "  Mr, 
<«  Brainetd  has  not  fo  much  Pain  norFever,  fince  I  laft  wrote, 
«  as  before  :  Yet  he  is  extreamly  weak  and  low,  and  very 
*«  faint,  expedting  every  Day  will  be  his  laft.  He  fays,  '//;  im" 
*'  poffible  far  him  to  live,  for  want  of  Life,  He  has  hardly  Vi- 
**  gour  enough  to  draw  his  Breath.  I  went  this  Morning  into 
<<  Town,  and  when  I  came  Home,  Mr.  Bromfietd  fa  id,  he 
«'  never  expedled  I  ihould  fee  him  alive  5  for  he  lay  twoHours, 
*'  as  they  thought,  dying  ;  One  could  fcarcely  tell,  whether 
««  be  was  alive,  or  not ;  he  was  not  able  to  fpeak,  for  fome 
**  Time:  But  now  is  much  as  he  was  before.  The  DoSfor 
«<  thinks,  he  will  drop  away  in  fuch  a  Turn.  Mr.  Brainerd 
««  fays,  he  never  felt  any  Thing  fo  much  like  Diffolution^  as 
<«  what  he  felt  to  Day  ;  and  fays,he  never  had  an;; Conception 
«'  of  its  being  pofTible  for  any  Creature  to  be  alive,  and  yet  fo 

<«  weak  as  he  is  from  Day  to  Day. Dodlor  Pyruhon  fays, 

*'  he  fhould  not  be  furprized,  if  h«fhould  (o  recover  as  to  live 
*«  half  a  Year  ;  nor  would  it  furprize  him,  if  hefliould  die  in 
*'  half  a  Day.  Since  I  began  to  write,  he  is  not  fo  well ;  hav- 
*'  ing  had  a  faint  Turn  again  :  Yet  patient  and  refjgncd,  hav- 
**  ing  no  diftreffing  Fears,  but  the  contrary." 

His  Phyfician,  the  honourable  Jofeph  Pynchon  Efq;  when  he 
vifited  him  in  his  extream  lllnefs  in  Bofion^  attributed  his  fink- 
ing fo  fuddenly  into  a  State  fo  extreamly  low,  and  nigh  unto 
peath,  to  the  breaking  of  Ulcers,  that  had  been  long  gathering 
(.in  his  Lungs  (as  Mr.  Brainerd  himfelf  intimates  in  a  foremen- 

H  h  mn% 


tlon'd  Paffege  in  his  Diary)  and  there  difcharging  and  diffufing 
their  purulent  Matter ;  which,  while  Nature  was  labouring 
and  ftruggling  to  throw  ofF  (that  could  be  done  no  otherwifc, 
than  by  a  gradual  ftraining  of  it  thro'  the  fmall  Veffelsof  thofe 
vita!  Parts )  This  occafion'd  an  high  Fever,  and  vioIcntCough- 
ing,  and  threw  the  whole  Frame  of  Nature  into  the  utmoft 
Diforder,  and  brought  it  near  to  a  Diflblution.  But  fuppofed, 
if  the  Strength  of  Nature  held  'till  the  Lungs  had  this  Way  gra- 
dually cleared  themfclvcs  of  this  putid  Matter,  he  might  revive, 
and  continue  better,  'till  new  Ulc«rs  gathered  and  broke  ;  but 
then  would  furely  fink  again  ;  and  that  there  was  no  Hope  of 
his  Recovery  ;  but  (  as  he  exprefled  himfelf  to  one  of  myNeigh- 
bours,  who  at  that  Time  Taw  him  in  Boflon)  he  was  as  certainly 
a  dead  Man,  as  if  he  was  {hot  through  the  Heart. 

But  fo  it  was  ordered  in  divine  Providence,  that  the  Strength 
of  Nature  held  out  through  this  great  Conflid,  io  as  juft  io 
cfcape  the  Grave  at  that  Turn  ;  and  then  he  revived,  to  the 
AftonifhmenC  of  all  that  knew  his  Cafe. 

After  he  began  to  revive,  he  was  vifited  by  his  youngeft  Bro- 
ther, Mr.  Ifrael  Braiuerd^  a  Student  at  Yalt- College  ;  who  hav- 
ing heard  of  his  extreme  lllnefs,  went  from  thence  to  Bo/lorty 
in  order  to  fee  him,  if  he  might  find  him  alive,  which  he  but 
iittle  expe£ted. 

This  Vifit  was  attended  with  a  mixture  of  Joy  and  Sorrow  to 
Mr,  Bralnerd.  He  greatly  rejoycedto  fee  his  Brother,  efpecialiy 
becaufe  he  had  dcfired  an  Opportunity  of  fome  religiousConver- 
fation  with  him  before  he  died.  But  this  meeting  was  attended 
%fith  Sorrow,  as  hisBrother  brought  tohim  the  forrow/ulTidings 
of  |iis  Srfter  o/>^«c^r'sDcath  at  Haddam-y  a  Sifter, between  whom 
and  him  had  long  fubfifted  a  peculiarly  dear  Affection, ar)d  much 
Intimacy  in  fpiritual  Matters,  and  whofe  Houfe  he  ufed  to  make 
his  Home,  when  he  went  to  Haddam,  his  native  Place".  He 
had  heard  nothing  of  her  Sicknefs  'till  this  Report  of  herPcath. 
But  he  had  ihcfe  Comforts,  together  with  the  Tidings,  •C^iz*  a 
Confidence  of  her  being  gone  to  Heaven,  and  an  Expedaticpn  of 
his  foon  meeting  her  tlierd—  His  Brother  continued  with  hini 
'rili  he  left  the  Town,  and  Came  with  him  from  thence  to 
IQortkampton. 

Concerning  tbe  laft  Sabbath  Mr.  Brainerd  fpent  in  Bofion^  jhc 
Writes  in  his  jD;<2ry  as  follows.]  'i 

f/jrd'3-Day,  July  19.  I  was  juft  able  to  attend  public  kWoA- 
fiiip,  being  carri^tothe  Hauft  of  God  in  a  Chaile.  Hc-aril 
Dr.  5/wtf// preach,  i«  ths  Forenoon  :  Partook  of  the  Lordv 
"'-'  Sup|,$i 


ef  Mr,  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1747.     233 

Supper  at  this  Time.  In  this  Sacrament,  1  faw  aftonifhing  di- 
vine/iTir/Jc^  difplay'd  ;  fuch  Wifdom  as  I  faw  required  "the 
Tongues  of 'Angels  and  glorified  Saints  to  celebrate  :  hkt^*d 
to  me,  I  never  foould  do  anyThing  at  adorin^;^  the  infinite  Wif- 
dom of  God  difcovered  in  theContrivance  of  Man's  Redemption^ 
until  1  arrived  at  a  World  of  Perfe6tion  ;  yet  1  could  not  help 
ftriving  to  calltipon  my  Soul  and  all  within  me  to  blefi  the  Name  ef 

God. In  the  Aftcrnoonjheard  Mi. Prince  preach.---  f  faw 

more  of  God  in  the  Wifdom  difcovered  in  the  Plan  of  Man's 
Redemption,  than  I  faw  of  any  other  of  his  PerfecStionSjthrough 
the  whole  Day. 

[  He  left  Bo/Ion  the  nextDay,  But  before  he  came  away,  he 
had  Occafion  to  bear  a  very  full  plain  and  c^cnTe/iimony  againft 
that  Opinion,  that  the  EJfena  of  faving  Faith  lies  in  believing 
ihatChriJi  died  for  me  in  particular ^zudi  that  this  is  xhtfirfik^k  of 
Faith  in  a  true  Believer's  clofing  with  Chrift.  He  did  it  in  a 
long  Conference  he  had  with  a  Gentleman,  that  has  very  pub- 
lickly  and  ftrenucufly  a-pear'd  to  defend  that  Tenet.  He  had 
this  I)ifcourfe  with  him  in  the  Prefcnce  of  a  Number  of  confi- 
derable  Perfons,  who  came  to  vifit  Mr.  Brainerd  before  ,'beleft 
the  Town,  and  to  take  their  Leave  of  him.  In  which  Debate, 
he  made  this  plain  Declaration  (at  the  fame  Time  confirming 
whathefaid,  by  many  Arguments)  That  the  EJfenceoi  faving 
Faith  was  wholly  left  out  of  that  Definition  of  faving  Faith 
which  that  Gentleman  has  publifhed  ;  and  that  the  Faith  which 
he  had  defined^  had  nothing  of  God  in  it,  nothing  above  Na- 
ture, nor  indeed  above  the  Power  of  the  Devils  j  and  that  all 
fuch  as  had  this  Faith,  and  had  no  better^  tho'  they  might  have 
this  to  never  fo  high  a  Degree,  would  furelv  perifh.  And  he 
declared  alfo,  that  he  never  had  greater  A[furance  of  the  Falfe- 
nefs  of  the  Principles  of  thofe  that  maintained /a^r^  a  Faith, and 
of  their  dangerous  and  deftru6iive  Tendency,  or  a  moj*c  afFcft- 
ing  Senfe  of  the  great  Delufion  and  Mifery  of  thofe  that  de- 
pended on  getting  to  Heaven  by  fuch  a  Faith  (while  they  had  n9 
hetter)K\\2in  he  lately  had  when  he  was  fuppofed  to  be  at  thePoint 

to^/>,and  expedled  everyMinutetopafsinto^/^m/;-. -Mr. 

-Sra/Wi'sDifcourfe  at  this  Time, and  the  forceableReafonings, 
by  which  he  confirmed  what  he  afTerted,  appeared  to  be  greatly 
la  the  Satisfadlion  of  thofe  prefent  ;  as  feveral  of  them  tookOc- 
cation  ?xprefly  to  manifeft  to  him,  before  they  took  Leave  of 
him, 

H  h  i  WhcB 


.'?*■ 


234    •^^-  3<^-  ^*^  LIFE 

When  this  Converfation  was  ended,  having  bid  an  afFedlio- 
nate  Farewel  to  his  Friends,  he  fet  out  in  the  Cool  of  the  Af- 
ternoon, on  his  Journey  toNorthamptofty  attended  bV  hisBrother, 
and  my  Daughter  that  went  with  him  to  B  ofion  ;  and  would 
have  been  accompanied  out  of  the  Town  by  a  Number  ofGen- 
'  tlemen,  befides  that  honourable  Perfon  who  gave  him  his  Com- 
pany for  fome  Miles  on  that  Occafion,  as  a  Teftimony  of  their 
Efteem  and  Rerpe6l,had  not  his  Averfion  to  any  Thing  of  Pomp 
and  Shew  prevenied  it.  j 

Saturday,  y«/y  25  1  arrived  here  at  Northampton'^  having 
fet  out  from  Bojion  on  Monday,  about  4  o'Clock  P.  M.  In  this 
Journey,  I  rode  abou*^  16  Miles  a  Day,  one  Day  with  another. 
was  fometimes  extremely  tired  and  faint  on  the  Road,  fo  that 
it  feem'd  impoffible  for  me  to  proceed  any  further  :  At  other 
Times  I  was  confiJcrably  better,  and  felt  fame  Freedom  both 
of  Body  and  Mind, 

Lord's-Day,  July  26.  This  Day,  I  faw  clearly,  that  I  fhould 
never  be  happy  ;  yea,  that  God  himfelf  could  not  make  me  hap- 
py, unlefs  1  could  be  in  a  Capacity  to  pleafe  and  glorify  him  for 
ever  :  Take  away  this^  and  admit  me  into  all  the  fine  Heavens 
that  can  be  conceived  of  by  Men  or  Angeb,  and  I  fliould  ftill 
be  miferable  forever. 

[  Tho*  he  had  fo  far  revived,  as  to  be  able  to  travel  thus 
far,  yethe  manifefted  no  Expectation  of  Recovery:  He  fup- 
pofed,  as  his  Phyfician  did,  that  his  being  brought  fo  near^to 
Death  at  55/?^»,  was  owing  to  the  breaking  of  Ulcers  in  his 
Lungs  :  He  told  me,  ihat  he  had  had  feveral  fuch  ill  Turns  be- 
fore, only  not  to  fo  high  a  Degree,  but  as  he  fuppofed,  owing 
to  the  fame  Caufe,  viz.  the  breaking  of  Ulcers  ;  and  that  he 
was  brought  lower  and  lower  every  Time  ;  and  it  appeared 
to  him,  that  in  his  laft  Sicknefs  (in  Bo/ion)  he  was  brought  as 
low  as  it  was  pofTible  and  yet  live  ;  and  that  he  had  not  the 
IeaftExpe6lation  offurviving  the  nextReturn  of  this  breaking  of 
Ulcers:  But  ftill  appeared  petfe6tly  calm  in theProfpect  ofDeath. 

Ort  Wednefday-Morning,  theWeek  after  he  came  ioNorth- 
errtptofty  he  took  feave  of  his  Brother  J/raei,  as  never  expeding 
to  fee  him  again  m  this  World  ;  he  nowietting  out  from  hence 
on  his  Journey  to  New-  J^aven.  " 

When  Mr.  BrainnJ  came  hither,  helitid  fo  much  Strength 
a«s  to  be  ablp,  from  Day  » o  Day,  to  ridcMttit  two  or  threeMiies, 
nnd  to  r^tturn  ;  and  fometi;iies  to  praylkt4heFamily ;  but  from 
this  Time  he  r^raduallyj  but  feuhblyj  decayed,  U  became  weak- 
er an4"*(eaiccr. 
.>,.  Whi!*? 


<?/  Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A. D.  1747.      235 

While  he  was  here,  his  Converfation  from  fi;ft  to  laft  was 
much  on  the  fame  Sabje6ls  as  it  had  been  when  in  Bojion  :  He 
wasmucb  in  fpeakingof  the  Nature  of  true  Religion  oi  Heart 
and  Practice,   as  diftinguifhed    from  it's   various  Counterfeits  5 
expreffinghis  great  Concern,  that  the  latter  did  fo  much  prevail 
in  many  Pluces.     He  often  manifefted  his  great  Abhorrence  of 
all  fuch  Doifrines  and  Principles  in  Religion,  as  in  any  virife  fa- 
voured of,  and  had  any  (  tho'  but  a  remote  )  Tendency  to  An- 
tinomianifm  ;  of  all  fuch  Notions,  as  feem'd  to  diminifli  tbeNe- 
ceflity  of  Holinefsof  Life,or  toabateMen's  Regard  to  theCom- 
mands  of  God,  and  a  ftridt  diligent  and  univerfal   Pra6>ice  of 
Vertue  and  Piety,  under  a  Pretence  of  depreciating  ourWorks, 
and  magnifying  God's  irtQ  Grace.  He  fpaks  often,  with  much 
Deteftation,  of  fuch  Experiences  and  pretended  Difcoveries  and 
Joys^  as  have  nothing  of  the  Nature  oi  San^ification  in  them, 
and  don't  tend  toStridnefs,  Tendcrnefs,  and  Diligence  inReli- 
gion,  and  Meeknefs  and  Benevolence   towards  Mankind,   and 
an  Humble  BehaWour  :  And  he  alfo  declared,  that  he  looked  on 
fuch  pretended  Humility  as  worthy  of  no  Regard,  that  was  not 
manifefted  by  Modefly  of  Condu^f  and  Convsrfation.     He  fpake 
often,  with  Abhorrence,  of  the  Spirit  and  Pradice  that  appears 
among  the  greater  Part  of  Separati/is  at  this  Day  in  the  Land, 
particularly,  thofe  in  the  eafiern  Parts  of  Connecticut  ;  in  theic 
condemning  andfeparating  fromtheJ?i3ndingM'm\{i{y  &Churches:, 
their  crying  down  Liarning  &  a  Learned  Miniftry,  theirNotion 
of  an  i/nmediateCall  io  the  Work  of  theMiniftry,and  theForward- 
nefs  of  Lay- men  to  fet  up  themfelves  as  publick  Teachers.  He 
had  been  much  converfant  in  the  Eaftern  Part  of  ConneSJicut(\\\s 
native  Place  being  near  to  it)  when  the  fime  Principles,  Noti- 
on and  Spirit  began  to  operate,  which   have  fincc  prevailed  to  a 
greater  Height  ;  and  had  Acquaintance  with  fome  of  thofe  Per- 
fons  who  are  become  Heads  and  Leaders  of  the  Separati/is  ;  ho 
had  alfo  been  converfant  withPerfons  of  the  fumeWay  elfcwhere: 
And  I  heard  him  fay,  once  and  again,  he  knew  by  his  Acquain- 
tance with  this  Sort  of  People,  that  what  was  chiefl/  and  mofl 
generally  inRepufe  among  them  as  thePower  o/Godline/s yV/as  an 
intircly  diff'erent  Thing  from  that  true  vital  Piety  recommended 
in  the  Scriptures^  and  had  nothing  in  it  of  that  Nature.     He  ma- 
nifefted a  greatDillike  of  a  Difpofition  in  Perfons  to  much  Noifa 
and  Show  in  Religion, and  affe^ing  to  be  abundant  in  proclaim- 
nig  and  publiftiing    their   own  Experiences ;  Tho'  at  the  fame 
Time  he  did  not  condemn^  but  approved    of  Chriftians  fpeak- 
ui  their  qwn  Experiences  on  fome  Qccafions^  an(J  to  fome  Per- 
fons, 


K 


>36  JEl/,20:        The  LIFE 

fons,  with  due  Modefty  andDifcretion.  He  him/e/f  fom£\lmety 
while  at  my  Houfe,  fpake  of  his  own  Experiences  :  But  it  was 
always  with  apparent  Rtjerve^  and  in  the  Exercife  of  Care  and 
Judgment  with  Refpefl  toOccafionSjPerfons,  and  Circumftan- 
ces.  He  mention'd  fome  remarkable  Things  of  his  own  religi- 
ous Experience  to  two  young  Gentlemen,  Candidates  for  the 
Miniftry,  who  watched  with  him  {  each  at  a  difFv-^rent  Time  ) 
when  he  was  very  low  and  not  far  from  his  End  -,  But  he  defired 
both  of  them  not  to  fpeak  of  what  he  had  told  them  'till  ofur 
hii  Death. 

The  Things  which  were  the  Subjedl  of  that  Debate  I  men- 
tioned before,  that  he  had  with  a  certain  Gentleman,  the  Day 
he  left  Bojlon^  feem'd  to  lie  with  much  Weight  on  his  Mind 
after  he  came  hither  ;  and  he  began  to  write  a  Letter  to  that 
Gentleman  ;  expreffing  his  Sentiments  concerning  the  dange- 
rous Tendency  of  fome  of  (he  Tenets  he  had  expreficd  in  Con- 
verfation,  and  in  the  Writings  he  had  publifhed  ;  v/ith  theCon* 
fiderations  by  which  the  exceeding  hurtful  Nature  of  thofe  No- 
tions is  evident  5  but  he  had  not  Strength  to  finifh  his  Letter. 

\  After  he  came  hither,  as  long  as  he  lived,  he  was  much  in 
pcakir>g  of  that  future  Profperi ty  of  Xioriy  that  is  fo  often  fore- 
1  old  and  promifed  in  the  Scripture  :  It  was  a  Theme  he  delight- 
;rd  to  dwell  upon  ;  and  his  Mind  feem'd  to  be  carried  forth 
►vith  earned  Concern  about  it,  and  intenfe  Defires,  that  Reli- 
ifion  might  fpeedily  and  abundantly  revive  and  flourifh  ;  tho'  he 
had  not  the  leaft  Expectation  of  Recovery  ;  yea,  the  nearer 
Death  advanced,  and  the  more  the  Symptoms  of  it's  Approach 
increafed,  ftill  the  more  did  hisMind  feem  to  be  taken  up  with 
this  Subje(Sl,  He  told  me,  when  near  his  End,  that  «*  hene- 
*«  ver  in  all  his  Life  had  his  Mind  {q  led  forth  in  Defires  and 
*'  earneft  Prayers  for  the  flourifhing  of  Christ's  Kingdom  on 
**  Earth,  as  fince  he  was  brought  fo  exceeding  low  at  Bojion.^* 
He  feem'd  much  to  wonder,  that  there  appear'd  no  more  of  a 
Difpofition  in  Miniftersand  People  to  pray  for  the  flourifhing 
of  Religion  thro'  the  World  ;  that  fo  little  a  Part  of  ihtxxPray 
erswzi^  generally  taken  up  about  it,  in  their  Families,  and  elfe- 
where  ;  and  particularly,  he  fevcral  Times  exprefTed  his  Won- 
der, (hat  there  appear'd  no  more  Forwardnefs  to  comply  with 
the  Piopofal  lately  made,  in  a  Memorial  from  a  Number  ofMi- 
nilters  in  Scotland,  and  fent  over  \uKo  America^  for  united  extra or^ 
dinary  Prayer^  among  Chrift's  Minifters  and  People,  for  the 
coming  0/  ChrifiU  Kingdom  :  And  he  feftlit  as  his  dying  Advice- 

to 


e>/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.       A.D.1747.    237 

to  his  cvjn  Congregaticriy  that  they  fliould  pradife  agreably  to 
that  PropofaL  t 

Tho'  be  was  conftantly  exceeding  weak,  yet  there  appcar'd 
in  him  a  continual  Care  well  to  improve  Time^znd  fill  it  up  with 
fomething  that  might  be  profitablcjand  in  feme  Refped  for  the 
Glory  of  God  or  the  Good  of  Men  ;  cither  profitable  Conver- 
fation,or  writing  Letters  to  abfent  Friends,  or  noting  fomething 
in  his  Diary,  or  looking  over  his  former  Writings,  correding 
them,  and  preparing  them  to  be  left  in  the  Hands  of  others  at 
his  Death,  or  giving  Tome  Diredtions  concerning  a  future  Con- 
dading  and  Management  of  his  People,  or  Employment  in 
fecret  Devotions.  He  feemM  never  to  be  eafy,  however  111,  if 
he  was  not  doing  fomething  for  God,  or  in  his  Service. 

After  he  came  hither,  he  wrote  a  Preface  to  a  Diary  of  the 
famous  Mr.  Shepard's  ( in  thofe.  Papers  before-mention'J,lately 
found  )  having  been  much  urged  (o  it  by  thofe  Gentlemen  in 
Bo/ion  who  had  the  Care  of  the  Publication  :  Which  Diary, 
with  his  Preface^  has  fince  been  publifhed.  % 

In  his  Diary  for  LordVDay,  Augufl  9.  He  fpeaks  of  longmg 
Defires  affer  Deaths  thro'  a  Senfe  of  the  Excellency  of  a  State 
of  PcrfeSiion, 

In  his  Diary  for- Lord's- Day  Aug.  16.  He  fpeaks  of  his 
having  fo  much  Refrefliment  of  Saul  in  the  Houie  of  (^^^^  that 
it  feem'd  alfo  to  rcfrefh  his  Body*  And  this  is  not  only  noted 
in  his  Diary, but  was  very  obfervable  to  others  ;  it  was  very  ap- 
parent, not  only,  t"hat  his  Mind  was  exhilcrated  with  inward 
Confolation,  but  alfo  that  his  animal  Spirits  and  bodily  Streiif^th 
feemed  to  be  remarkably  redored,  as   tho'  he  had  forgot  hi? 

Illnefa But  this  was  the  lad:  Time  that  ever  he  attended 

publick  Worfhip  on  the  Sabbath. 


f  His  Congregation, fince  this, have  with  great  Chearfulnefs 
and  Unanimity  fallen  in  with  this  Advice,  and  have  praiSti- 
fed  agreably  to  the  Propofal  from  Scotland ;  and  have  at 
Times,  appeared  with  uncommon  Engagednefs  and  Fer- 
vency of  Spirit  in  their  Meetings  and  united  Devotions, 
purfuant  to  that  Propofal  :  Alfo  the  Prefbyteries  of  Isliw 
Torkj  and  Neiu-Brunfvjick^  fmce  this,  have  with  one  Con- 
fent,  fallen  in  with  the  Propofal,  aslikewife  {otne  others  of 
God's  People  m  thofe  Parts. 

X  A  Part  of  this  Preface  is  infertexi  in  the  Appendix  to  this 
Hiiiory. 

On 


i 


238    Mt.  30.  1U  LIFE 

OnTuefday-Morning  that  Week  ( I  being  abfent  on  a  JouN 
ney  )  he  prayed  with  my  Family  ;  but  not  without  much 
Difficulty,  for  want  of  bodily  Strength  :  And  this  was  the  laft 
Family-Prayer  that  ever  he  made. 

He  had  been  wont,  'till  now,  frequently  to  ride  out,  two  or 
three  Miles ;  But  this  Week,  on  Thurfday,  was  the  laftTimc 
he  ever  did  fo.] 

Lord*s-Day,  Aug*  23.  This  Morning,  I  was  confiderably 
refrcfh'd  with  the  Thought,  yea,  the  Hope  and  Expedatinn  of 
the  Enlargement  o{  Christ's  Kingdom  ;  and  I  could  not  but 
hope,  the  Time  was  at  Hand, when ^fl^y/tf«  the  great  would /c//, 
and  rije  no  more  :  This  led  me  to  fome  fpiritual  Meditations^ 
that  were  very  refrefhing  to  me,  I  was  unable  to  attend  pub* 
lick  VVorfhip,  either  Part  of  the  Day  ;  but  God  was  pleafed  to 
afford  me  Fixcdncfs  and  Satisfa£lion  in  divine  Thoughts.  No- 
thing fo  refrefhes  my  Soul,  as  when  I  can  go  to  God,  yea,  to 
God  my  exceeding  Joy,  When  he  is  fo,  fenfibly,  to  my  Soul,  Ob^ 
how  unfpeakably  delightful  is  this  ! 

In  the  Week  paft,  1  had  divers  Turns  of  inward  Refrefhing  ; 
tho*  my  Body  was  inexpreffibly  weak,  followed  continually 
with  Agues  and  Fevers.  Sometimes  my  Soul  center'd  in  God, 
as  my  o\^\) Portion  ;  and  I  felt  thatlfhould  be  forever  unhappy, 
i/  he  did  not  reign  :  I  faw  the  Sweetnefs  andHappinefs  of  being 
4  his  Subject,  at  bis  Difpofal  :  Th^s  made  all  my  Difficulties 
quickly  vanifh. 

From  thisLord's-Day,z;/z.  Jug.i^-^  was  troubled  very  much 
with  vapoury  Diforders,  and  could  neither  write  nor  read,  and 
could  fcarcely  live  ;  altho*  through  Mercy,  was  not  fo  much 
opprefsM  with  heavy  Melancholy  and  Gloominefs,  a$  at  many 
other  Times. 

[  'Till  this  Week  he  had  been  wont  to  lodge  in  a  Room 
above  Stairs ;  but  he  now  grew  lo  weak,  that  he  was  no  longer 
able  to  go  Mp  Stairs  and  down  ;  Friday  Jug.  28.  was  the  laft 
Time  he  ever  went  above  Stairs,  henceforward  he  betook  him- 
felf  to  a  lower  Room. 

On  Wednefdav,  September  2.  Being  the  Day  of  our  publick 
Leaure,he  feemM  to  be  refrelh'd  with  feeing  theNeighbouring 
Minifters  that  came  hitber  to  the  Leaure,and  exprcfsM  a  great 
Defire  once  m^re  to  go  to  theHoufe  of  God  on  thatDay  :  And 
accordingly  rode  to  the  Meeting,  and  attended  divine  Service,. 
while  iheRtv.  Mr.  IFofdhridicQi  Hat  field  ^izd^zWd.  He  fignified 

thafi 


<?/ ikfr.  BavfdBralnerda  A.D.1747;  239 

that  he  fuppofcd  it  to  be  the  laft  Time  that  ever  he  fliould  at- 
tend the  publick  Worfhip  5  as  it  proved.  And  indeed  it  was 
the  lalt  Time  that  ever  he  went  out  at  our  Gate  alive. 

On  the  Saturday-Evening  next  following,  he  was  unexped- 
cdly  vifitcd  by  his  Brother  Mr.  JchnBrainerd^  who  came  to  fee 
him  from  JSJew-Jerfey,  He  was  much  refrefhed  by  this  unex- 
pected Vifit,this  Brother  being  peculiarly  dear  to  him  ;  and  he 
feem'd  torejoyce  in  a  devout  and  foJemn  Manner,  to  fee  him, 
and  to  hear  the  comfortable  Tidings  he  brought  concerning  the 
State  of  his  dear  Congregation  of  Chriftian  Indians :  And  aCir- 
cumftancje  of  this Vifit,  that  he  was  exceeding  glad  of,was,  that 
his  Brother  brought  him  feme  of  his  privateWritings  UomNew- 
^erfey^  and  particularly  his  Diary  that  he  had  kept  for  many 
Years  paft.  ] 

Lord VDay,  Sept.  6.  I  began  to  read  feme  of  my  private 
Writings,  which  my  Brother  brought  me  ;  and  was  confidera- 
bly  refrefh'd,  with  what  I  met  with  in  them. 

Monday,  Sept.  7.  I  proceeded  farther  in  reading  my  old  pri- 
vate VV^ritings,  and  found  they  had  the  fame  Effedt  upon  me  as 
before  :  I  could  not  but  rejoyce  and  blefs  God  for  what  pafTed 
long  ago,  which  without  Writing  had  been  entirely  loft. 

This  Evening,  when  I  was  in  great  Diftrefs  of  Body,  jmySou! 
long'd  that  God  fhould  be  glorified  :  1  faw  there  was  no  Hea- 
ven but  this.  I  could  not  but  fpeak  to  the  By-flanders  then  of 
the  only  Happlnefi,  viz.  Pleafeng  God..  Oh  that  1  could  foe 
ever  live  to  God!  TheDay,  I  trufl,is  at  Hand, the  perfedDay  : 
Oh,  the  Day  of  Deliverance  from  all  Sin  ! 

Lord's-Day,  Sept.  13.  I  was  much  refrefliM  and  engaged  m 
Meditation  and  Writing,  and  found  a  Heart  to  a<5l  for  God,. 
My  Spirits  were  refrefhed,  and  my  Soul  delighted  to  do  fome- 
thing  for  God. 

[On  the  Evening  following  that  Lord's  Day,  his  Feet  begart 
to  appear  fenfibly  fweird  ;  which  thenceforward  fwell'd  more 
and  more.     A  Symptom  of  his  D  ffolution  coming  on. 

The  next  Day,  his  Brother  John  left  him,  being  obliged  to^ 
return  to  New-jferfeyoi^  fome  Bufinefs  of  great  Importance  and 
Neceflity  ;  intending  to  return  again  with  all  pofTiblc  Speed „ 
hoping  to  fee  his  Brother  yet  once  more  in  the  Land  of  the 
Living. 

Mr.  Brainerd  having  now  with  much  Deliberation  confider- 
cd  of  fche  impprt^nt  Affair  fore-mentionedjlcfi  with  him  by  the 

I  i  honctiraWe 


240      ^V.  30:  7S(?  L  I  F  E 

honourable  Commiffioners  in  Boflon,  of  theCorporatfon  inXtf;y- 
donioT  the  Propagation  of  the  Gofpel  in  New- England  and 
Parts  adjacent,  viz.  the  fixing  upon  and  recommending  two 
Pcrfons  proper  to  be"  improved  as  Miilionaries  to  the  Six  Na- 
/w;?;,  he  about  this  Time  wrote  a  Letter,  recommending  two 
young  Gentlemen  of  his  Acquaintance  to  thofeComraiffioncrs, 
viz.  Mr,  Elibu  Spencer  of  Eaft'Haddam^  and  Mr.  J  oh  Strong 
of  Northampton,  The  Coramiilioners  on  the  Receipt  of  thisLet- 
ter,  cheerfully  and  unanimoufly  agreed  to  accept  of  and  employ 
thePerfons  he  had  recommended  :  Who  accordingly  have  fmce 
waited  on  the  Commiffioners  to  receive  their  Inftruftions  ;  and 
purfuant  to  their  Inftruilions,  have  applied  themfelves  to  a  Pre- 
paration for  the  Bufinefs  of  their  Miifion,  in  the  Manner  to 
which  they  dire(Stcd  them  ;  and  one  of  them,  viz.  Mr.  Spencer, 
has  been  folemnly  ordained  to  that  Work,  by  feveral  of  theMi- 
nifters  of  Bo/ion^  in  the  Prefence  of  an  Ecclefiaftical  Council 
convened  for  thatPurpofe  ;  and  is  now  gone  forth  to  the  Nation 
of  the  Oncidaes,   about  170  Miles  beyond  Albany, 

'  He  alfo  this  Week,  viz.  on  Wednefday,  Septemb.  16.  wrote 
a  Letter  to  a  particular  Gentleman  in  Bojion  (  one  of  thofc 
charitable  Perfons  foremention'd,  who  appeared  fo  forward  to 
contribute  of  their  Subfiance  for  the  promoting  Chriftianity  a- 
moKg  the  Indiam  )  relating  to  the  Growth  of  the  7«^w«School, 
and  the  Need  of  another  School-Mafter  or  fome  Perfonto  aflift 
the  School-Mafter  in  iiaflruding  the  Indian  Children.  Thefe 
Gentlemen,  on  the  Rec;eipt  of  this  Letter,  had  a  Meeting, and 
agreed  with  greatChearfulnefs  to  give  200  Pounds  ( in  Bills,  of 
the  old  Tenor )  for  the  Support  of  another  School-Mafter  -,  and 
dcfired  the  Rev.  Mr.  Pembertonoi  New-York  (  who  was  then 
at  Bojion,  and  was  alfo,  at  their  Dcfire,  prefent  at  their  Meet- 
ingj  as  fl)on  as  poiTible  to  procure  a  fuitable  Perfon  for  thatSer- 
vice  ;  and  alfo  agreed  to  allow  75  Pounds  to  defray  feme  ifpe- 
cial  Charges,  that  were  requifite  to  encourage  the  MifTion  to 
the  Six  Nations  (befides  the  Salary  allowed  by  the  Commiflio- 
rers )  which  was  alfo  done  on  fome. Intimations  given  by  Mr. 
£rc  incrd. 

Mr.  £Vtf;Wrifpcnt  himfelf  much  in  writing  thofe  Letters, 
being  exceeding  weak  :  But  it  feem'd  to  be  much  to  his  Satis- 
facSlion,  that  he  had  been  enabled  to  doit  ;  hoping  that  it  was 
fomethingdone  for  God,  and  which  might  be  for  the  advance- 
ment of  Christ's  Kingdom  and  Glory.     In  writing  the  laft 

f  thefe  Letters,  he  was  obliged   to  ufc  the  Hand  of  another, 
cing  able  to  write  himfel.'. 

On 


o/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A...D.  1747.'     24.1 

On  theThurfday  of  this  Week  [Septemh.  17.  )  was  thelaft 
Time  that  ever  he  went  out  of  his  Lodging  Room.  That 
Day,  he  was  again  vilited  by  his  Brother  Ifraet,  who  continued 
with  him  thence-forward  'till  his  Death.  Oa  that  Evening,  he 
was  taken  with  fomething  of  a  Diarrhea  ;  which  helook'd  up- 
on as  another  Sign  of  his  approaching  Death  :  Whereupon  he 
exprefs'd  himfelf  thus  ;  Oh^  theg/oricus  Time  is  r,ow  coming  !  I 
have  UngediQ  ferve  GodperfeSily  :  Now  God  will  gratify  thofe 
Defires  !  And  fromTime  toTime,  at  the  fevcral  Steps  and  new 
Symptoms  of  the  fenfible  Approach  of  his  DiUbluiion,  he  was 
fo  far  from  being  funk  or  damp'd,  that  he  feem'd  to  be  animat- 
ed, and  made  mgrechearful ;  as  being  glad  at  the  Appearance:? 
of  Deaih*s  Approach.  He  often  ufed  theEpithet,  glorious^  when 
fpeaking  of  the  Day  of  his  Deaths  calling  \i  that  glorious  Day. 
And  as  he  faw  his  DifTolution  gradually  approaching,  be  was 
much  in  talking  about  it,  with  perfed  Calmnefs  fpeaking  of 
a  future  State  ;  and  alfo  fettling  all  hisAfFairs,  yexy  particularly 
and  minutely  giving  Directions  concerning  what  he  would 
have  done  in  one  Refpe<Sl  and  another  after  he  was  dead.  And 
the  nearer  Death  approached, the  more  defirous  he  feem'd  to  be 
of  it.  He  feveral  Times  fpake  of  the  difFerent  Kinds  of  PFil- 
lingnefs  to  die  ;  and  fpoke  of  it  as  an  ignoble, meanKind  of  Wii- 
lingnefs  to  die,  to  be  willing  to  leave  the  Body,  only  to  get  rid 
of  Pain  ;  or  to  go  to  Heaven,  only  to  get  Honour  and  Advance- 
ment there.] 

Saturday,  ^^p/.  19.  near  Night,  while  I  attempted  to  walk 
a  little, my  Tho'ts  turned  thus  ;  How  infinitely Jweet  it  is^to  lovi 
God,  and  be  all  for  him  I  Upon  which  ic  was  fuggefted  to  me, 
Tou  are  not  an  Angel^mt  lively  ana  a^ive.  To  which  my  whole 
Soul  immediately  replied,  1  as fmcerely  defire  to  love  and  glorify 
God^as  any  Angel  in  Heaven.  Upon  which  it  was  fuggefted  again. 
But  you  are  filthy  ^not  fit  for  Heaven.  Hereupon  inftantly  appear'd 
the  blefled  Robes  of  Christ's  Righteoufnefs, vih'xch  1  could  not 
but  exulc  and  triumph  in  ;  and  1  view'd  the  infiniteExcellency 
of  God,  and  my  Soul  even  broke  with  Longings,  tfiat  God^ 
ihouldhz  glorified,  I  thought  of  Dignity  in  Heaven  ;  but  in- 
ftantly the  Tho't  returned,  1  don't  goto  Heaven  to  get  Honour^ 
hut  to  give  all  pojfible  Glory  and  Pra'tfe.  Oh,  how  I  ionged,that ' 
God  (hould  be  glorified  on  Earth  alfo  I  Oh>  1  was  made,  foe 
Eternity,  if  God  might  be  glorified!  Sodi/y  Pains  Icztcd  not 
for:  Tho'  I  was  then  in  Extremity,  I  never  felt  eafier ;  I  felt 
willing  to  glorify  GdH  in  that  State  of  bodily  Diftrefs,  as  long  as 
he  picafed  I  fhould  continue  in  it.    The  Qravs  appeared  really 

111  *        fv/ect^ 


242      yS/.3<5-  ^^^   ^^^^ 

fwect,  and  1  longed  to  lodge  my  weary  Bones  in  it :  But  Oh 
that  God  might  be  glorified  !  this  was  the  Burden  of  all  myCiy. 
Oh,  I  knew,  1  {hould  be  a£five  as  an  Angel,  in  Heaven  ;  and 
that  I  fhould  be  itrip'd  of  my  fiUhyGarmenti  !  So  that  there  was 

no  Objedion. But  Oh,  to  love  and  praife  God  more,  to 

plea/e  him  for  ever  !  This  my  Soul  panted  after,  and  even  now 
pants  for  while  1  write.  Oh,  that  God  might  be  glorified  in  the 
whole  Earth.  Lor d^  let  thy  Kingdom  come.  I  longed  tor  a  Spi- 
rit oi  Preaching  to  defcend  and  reft  on  Af/«//?^r;, that  they  might 
addrefs  the  Confciences  of  Men  with  Clofenefs  and  Power.  I 
faw,  God  had  therefidue  of  the- Spirit ;  and  my  Soul  longed  it 
fhould  ht poured  from  on  high,  1  could  not  but  plead  with  God 
for  my  dear  Congregation,  that  he  would  preferve  it,  and  not 
fuffci  his  great  Nam^e  to  lofe  it's  Glory  in  that  Work  ;  MySouI 
ftill  longing,  that  Gci  might  be  glorified, 

[  The  extraordinary  Frame,  that  he  was  in,  that  Evening, 
could  not  be  hid  ;  his  Mouth  /pake  out  of  the  Abundance  of  his 
Heart,  eXpreiTmg  in  a  very  afFecSling  Manner  much  the  fame 
Things  as  are  written  in  his  Diary  :  And  among  very  many 
other  extraordinary  ExprefHons,  which  he  then  uttered,  were 
fuch  as  thefe  ;  «'  My  Heaven  is  to  pleafe  God,  and  glorify  hi?:!^ 
*'  and  give  all  to  him,  and  to  be  wholly  devoted  to  his  Glory  ; 
<«  that  is  the  Heaven  I  long  for  ;  that  is  my  Religion,  and 
*^  that  is  my  Happ'mefs  ;  and  always  was  ever  fmce  1  fuppofe 
««  i  had  any  true  Religion  ;  and  all  thofe  that  are  of  that  Re- 

^«  Ilgion,  diajl  meet  me  in  Heaven.- •  I  don't  go  to  Heaven 

*'  to  be  advanced, but  to  give  Honour  toGod.  'Tis  noMatter 
*«  where  I  fhall  be  fbtion'd  in  Heaven,  whether  1  have  a  high 
<'  or  a  low  Seat  there  ;  but  to  love  and  pleafe  and  glori/y  God 
*«  is  al!  :  Had  I  a  Thoufand  Sculsy  if  they  were  worth  any 
**  Thing,  1  would  give  'cm  all  to  God  ;  but  I  have  nothing 
"  to  give,  when  all  is'donc. — ~  h  is  impofTible  for  any  rational 
*'   Creature  to  be  happy  vi'ithout  ccling  aW  for  God :  God  him- 

**   fslr  could  not  make  him  happv  any  other  Way. 1  long 

*'    to  be  in  Heaven,   prarfing  ai;d  glorifying  GoD  .with  the  holy 

*»   Angels  :   All  my  Dcfire  is  to  glorify  God. My  Heart 

*^  eoe;  out  to  the  'liur)ir:g  Place  \  it  f«ems  to  me  a  dejirabk 
'*  V\oiZ'C  :   but  Oh  io  glorify  (lOD^that  is  it  ;    that  is  above 

"  all 'Tis  a  great  Comf'^rapb  mc,  to  think,  that  i  have 

''  done  a  liltlc/<?r  God  in  the  V\i?rld  :  Oh  !  'tis  but  z  very 
"  Jmail  Matter ;  yet  1  have  d<»he  a  little  ;  and  I  lament  it, 
^ "  that  I  have  not  done  mors  for  hiiT)''- — • There  is  nothing 


(>/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.     A.D.  1747.     24,^ 

c«  in  the  World  worth  living  for,  but  doing  Good,  znd  ^ni/hing 
««  God's  IVork^  doing  theWork  that  Chrljl  did.  I  fee  iiothincr 
<«  elfein  the  World,    that  can  yield   any  Satisfaaion,  bcfide* 

*'  living  to  God,  pleafmg  hinty  and  ^^y/wi-  his  whole  Will. . 

*'  Mv  greateft  Joy  and  Comfort  has  been,  to  do  fomething  for 
''  promoting  thelntered  of  Religion, and  theSouls  of  particular 
*'  Perfons  :  And  now,  in  my  Illnefs,  while  I  am  full  of  Pain 
**  and  Diftrefs,  from  Day  to  Day,  all  the  Comfort  I  have,  is 
*'  in  being  able  to  do  fonie  little  Chare  [  or  frnall  Piece  of 
*'  Work  ]  for  God  ;  either  by  fomething  that  I  fay,  or  by 
"  writing,  or  fome  other  Way." 

He  intermingled  with  thefe  and  other  like  Exprellions,m3ny 
pathetical  Counjels  to  thofe  that  were  about  him  ;   particularly 
to  my  Children  and  Servants.      He  applied  himfelt  to  fome  of 
my  younger  Children  at  this  Time  ;    calling  them  to  him,  and 
fpeaking  to   *em  one   by  one  j  fetting  before  them,  in  a  very 
plain  Manner,    the  Nature  and    Efl'ence  of  true  Piet)',  and  its 
great  Importance  and  Neceffity  ;  earnefily  warning  them  not 
to  reft  in  any  Thing  (hort  of  that  true  and   thorough  Change  of 
Heart,  and  a  Life  devoted  toGod  ;  ccunfelling  them  not  to  be 
flack  in  the  great  Bufinefs  of  P.eligion,nor  in  the  leaft  to  delay 
it  ;    enforcing  his  Counfels  with  this,  that  his  Words  were  the 
Words  of  a  dying  Man  :  Said  he,    "I  fhall  die  here, and  here  £ 
*'  fhall  be  buried,  and  here  you  will  fee  my  Grave, and  do  you 
"  remember  what  I  have  faid  to  you. I  am  going  intc  Eternity  v 
««  And 'tis  fweet  to  me  to  think  of  Eternity;  the  Endlefnefs 
*«  of  it  makes  it  Tweet:   But  Oh,  what  fiiall  1  fay  to  the  Eter- 
*«  nity  of  the^F/V/^^^/  I  can't  mention  it,nor  think  of  it :  The 
''  Thought  is  too  dreadful.      When  you  fee  my  Grave,    then 
"  remember  what  I  faid  to  you  while  f  was  alive  :    then  think 
'«  with  your  felf,  how  thatMan,  that  lies  in  that  Grave,  coun- 
f '  felPd  and  warned  me  to  prepare  ^or  Death." 

His  Body  fceroed  to  be  marvelloufly  ftren^hen'd,  through 
the  inward  Vigour  andRefrefhment  of  h\s Mind  ;  fo  that,  akho' 
be!ore  he  was  fo  weak  that  he  could  hardly  utter  a  Sentence, 
yet  now  he  continued  his  moft  affecting  and  profitable Difcourfe 
to  us  for  more  than  an  Hour,  with  fcarce  any  Intermiflion  ; 
and  faid  of  it,  when  he  had  done,  //  was  the  iajl  Sermon  thai 
evir  he  Jhould  preach. 

This  extraordinary  Frame  of  Mind  continued  the  nextDay  ; 
cf  which  he  fays  in  his  Diary  as  follows. J 

Lord's-Day  Sept,  20.  Was  itill  in  a  {^wztt  and  comfortable 
Frame  j  and  was  again  melted  with  Defires  that  Q::Ti  migbt 

be 


244    ^^'  50.  TU  LIFE 

be  ghriJiediZX)d  with  Longings  to  love  and  live  to  him.  Longed 
for  the  Influences  of  the  divine  Spirit  to  defcend  onMini/ien^  in 
a  fpecial  Manner.  And  Oh,  I  longed  to  be  with  God,  to  be- 
told  his  Glory,  and  to  bow  in  his  Prefence  ! 

[4t  appears  by  what  is  noted  in  his  Diary,  both  of  thisDay, 
and  the  Evening  preceeding,  that  his  Mind  at  this  Time  was 
much  imprefs'd  with  a  Senfe  of  the  Importance  of  the  Work  of 
the  Minijiry, ind  the  Need  of  the  Grace  of  God,  and  his  fpecial 
fpiritual  Affiftance  in  this  Work  :  And  ft  alfo  appeared  in  what 
he  exprefTed  in  Converfation  ;  particularly  in  his  Difcourfe  to 
bis  Brother  J/rae/,  who  was  then  a  Member  of  Tale-College  at 
2s!ew-Haven,  and  had  been  profecuting  his  Studies  and  acade- 
mical Excrcifes  there,  to  that  End,  that  he  might  be  fitted  for 
the  Work  of  the  Miniftry,  and  was  now  with  him.*  He  now, 
and  from  Time  to  Time,  in  this  his  dying  State, recommended 
to  his  Brother,  a  Life  of  Self-denial,  of  Weanedncfs  from  the 
World,  and  Devotedncfs  to  God,  and  an  earneft  Endeavour  to 
obtain  much  of  the  Grace  of  God's  Spirit,  and  God's  gracious 
Influences  on  his  Heart  ;  reprefenting  the  great  Need  which 
Minil^ers  ftand  in  of  them,  and  the  unfpeakable  Benefit  of 
them  from  his  own  Experience.  Among  many  other  Expref- 
fions,  he  faid  thus  ;  «'  When  Minifiers  feel  thefe  fpecial  gra- 
*'  cious  Influences  on  their  Hearts,  it  wonderfully  aififts  them 
<<  to  come  at  the  Confciences  of  Men, and  as  it  were  to  handle 
<«  them  withHands  ;  whereas,  without  them,whateverReafon 
««  and  Oratory  we  make  ufe  of, we  do  but  make  ufe  oi  Stumps, 
««  inftead  of  Hands.*'] 

Monday,  Sept.  21.  I  began  to  corrcft  a  little  Volume  of 
mv  private  Writings :  God,  I  believe,  remarkably  helped  me 
in  it ;  my  Strength  was  furprizingly  lengthened  out,  and  my 
Thoughts  quick  and  lively,  and  my  Soul  refrefh'd,  hoping  it 
^  might  be  a  Work  for  God.  Oh,  how  good,  how  fweet  it  is, 
to  labour  for  God  ! 


This  young  Gentleman  was  an  ingenious,ferious,ftudiou$ 
and  hopefully  truly  pious  Perfon  :  There  appeared  in  him 
many  (Qualities  giving  Hope  of  his  being  a  great  Bleffing 
in  his  Day.  But  it  has  pleafed  God,  fince  the  Death  of 
his  Brother,  to  take  him  away  alfo.  He  died  that  Winter, 
at  New- Haven,  on  Jan.  6.  1747,8.  of  a  nervous  Fever, 

after  about  a  Fortnight's  Illncfs. 

Tuefday, 


cfMr.  David  Brainerd      A.D.1747.     245 

Tuefday,  5/?p/.  22.     Was  again  employed  in  reading  and- 
corre6ting,  and  had  the  fame  Succefs,  as  the  Day  before.    I  was 
exceeding  weak;  but  it  feem'd  lo  refrefh  my  Soul,  thus  to 
fpend  Time. 

Wednefday,  Sept.  23.  I  finifhM  my  Correaions  of  the  little 
Piece  foremention'd,and  felt  uncommonly  peaceful  :  It  {q^xs^^ 
as  if  I  had  now  done  all  my  Work  in  this  World, and  flood  ready 
for  my  Call  to  a  better.  As  long  as  I  fee  any  Thing  to  be  done 
for  God,  Life  is  worth  having  :  But  Oh,how  vain  and  unwor- 
thy 'tis,  to  live  for  any  lower  End  ! This  Day,  I  injJited 

a  Letter,  I  think,  of  great  Importance,  to  the  Rev.  Mr.  Byram 
in  New-Jerfey  :  Oh  that  God  would  blefs  and  fucceed  thatLet- 
ter,which  was  written  for  theBenefit  of  hisChurch  !  *  Oh  that 
God  would  puri/y  ihe  Sons  of  Levi,  that  his  Glory  may  be  ad- 
vanced ! This  Night,  I  endured  a  dreadful  Turn,  wherein 

my  Life  was  expeded  fcarce  an  Hour  or  Minute  together.  But 
blefled  be  God,  I  have  enjoyed  confiderable  Sweelnefs  in  divine 
Things,  this  Week,  both  by  Night  and  Day. 

Thurfday,  Sept,  24.  My  Strength  began  to  fail  exceedingly  ; 
which  look'd  further  as  if  I  had  done  all  my  Work  :  However 
I  had  Strength  to  fold  and  fuperfcribe  my  Letter.  About  two 
I  went  to  Bed,  being  weak  and  much  difordered,  and  lay  in  a 
burning  Fever  'till  Night,  without  any  proper  Reft.  In  the 
Evening,  I  got  up, having  Jain  down  in  fome  of  myCloaths  j  but 
was  in  the  greateft  Diftrefs,  that  ever  I  endured,  having  an  un- 
common Kind  of  Hiccough  ;  which  either  ftrangled  me,  or 
threw  me  into  a  Straining  to  vomit ;  and  at  the  fame  Time  was 
diftrefs'd  with  griping  Pains.  Oh, the  Diftrefs  of  thisEvening  I 
1  had  little  Expedaiion  of  my  living  th^  Night  tHVough,  nor 
indeed  had  any  about  me;  and  I  longed  for  the  finijhinz  Mo- 
ment ! I  was  obliged    to  repa'r  to*Bed  by  6  o'Clock  ; 

and   thro'   Mercy  enjoyed  Tome  Reft;   but  was  grievoufly  dif- 

tref^'d  at  Turns  with  the  Hiccough ^  My  Soul  breathed 

a^ter  God,  while  the  Watcher  was  with  me:  —  When flyall 
1  come  to  Godjf  even  to  Gody  my  exceeding  "Joy?  Oh  for  hii'  b^ejjed 
Likenefs  ! 

PViday,  Sept.  25.  This  Day,  I  was  unfpeakably  weak,  and 
little  better  than  bpeechlefs  all  the  D^y  :   However,  I  v/as  abJe 


If^  was  concerning  theQ^jalificaiions  of  Mtmflers^zvi^  the 
Examination  and  L'Cenfing  0'  Caniida'e:  for  the  Vfork  of 


the  Mifjiitry 


x<a 


246      Mt  0,0.  ri'(?LIFE 

to  write  a  .  '^,  and  felt  comfortably  in  fome  Part  of  the  Day, 
Oh,  it  rc':cf:i:dmy  Sou),  to  think  of  former  Things,  ofDefires 
to  glorif}'  G:d,  of  the  Pleafures  of  living  to  him  !  Oh  my  dear 
Godyl  am  fpeediiy  coming  to  ihee^  1  hope  !  Ha  ft  en  the  Day^  OLord^ 
if  it  be  thy  bUJJ'edWill :  Oh  come^  Lord  Jefus^  come  quickly.  Amen,  * 

Saturday,  Sept.  7.6.  I  felt  the  Sweetnefs  of  divine  Things, 
this  Forenoon ;  and  had  the  Coiifolation  of  a  Confcioufnefs  that 
I  was  doing  fome  thing  for  God. 

Lord's-Day,  Sept.  27.  This  was  a  very  comfortable  Day 
to  my  Soul  ;  I  think,  1  awoke  with  God,  1  was  enabled  to  lift 
up  my  Soul  to  God.,  early  this  Morning  ;  and  while  I  had  little 
bodily  Strength.  I  found  Freedom  to  lift  up  my  Heart  to  God 
for  my  felt  and  others.  Afterwards, was  pleafed  with  theThoughts 
offpcedily  entrifig  into  the  unfeen   World. 

[  Eariy  this  Morning,  ^s  one  of  the  Family  came  into  the 
Room,  he  exprefs'd  himfelf  thus  :  1  have  had  more  Pleafure  this 
Morning.,   then  cU  the  Drunkards  /«  the  fVorli  enjoy ^  if  it  were 

ail  (xiraaed  ! So  much  did  he  efteem  the  Joy  of  Faith 

eibovmhQ  Plt!afur£s  of  Sin. 

He  fcilt.  that  Morning,  an  unufual  Appetite  to  Food  ;  with 
which  his  Mind  fcem'd  to  be  exhilarated,  as  looking  on  it  aSign 
of  the  very  near  Approach  of  Death  ;  and  faid  upon  it,  I  was 
horn  en  a  Sabbath-Day  ;  and  1  hf^ve  Reafon  io  think  1  was  new- 
bornon  «Sabbath-Day  ;  iff  1  hope  Ifhalldie  on  /^/i  Sabbath- Day  : 
J  fhould  look  vpm  it  as  a  Favour,  if  it  may  be  the  Will  of  God  that 
it  fh:u'd  hefo  :  I ion^rfor  the  Time.  Oh,  why  is  his  Chariot  fo 
Joi;g  in  coming  I  Why  tarry  the  Wheels  of  his  Chariots  ?  1  am 
very  willing  to  part  with  all- :  2  am  willing  to  part  with  my  dear 
Brotherjohn,  and  never  to  fee  him  again,  to  go  to  be  forever  with 
she  Lord,  f  Qh,  when  I  pothers,  hoivtuill  Gcd's  dear  Church  on 
Earth  be  upon   my  Mind  ! 


*  This  was  the  h.ft  that  ever  he  wrote  in  his  Diary  with  his 
own  Hand  :  Tho'  it  is  continued  a  little  farther,  in  a  bro- 
ken Manner  ;  written  hv  his  Brother  Ifrael,  but  indieJ 
by  his  Mouth  in  this  his  weak  and  dying  State. 

t  He  had,  bcfo/e  this,  txprefs'd  a  Dciire,  if  it  m'ght  be  the 
Will  of  God,  to  live  *till  his  Brother  returned  from  Kew^ 
Jerfey  :  Who, when  he  went  away, intended, if  ponible,to 
perform  his  Journey  and  return  in  a  Fortnight  ;  hoping 
once  more  to  meet  his  Brother  in  the  Land  of  the  Living. 
Tiie  Foruiight  was  nor.'  :Kar  expired,  it  ending  the  next 
Da;'.  "  AUervvards 


cf  Mr.  David  Brainerd;      A.D.  i  ^j^f,    247 

Afterwards,  the  fame  Morning,  being  aflced,  how  he  did,  he 
anfwered,  /  em  almo/i  in  Eternity  ;  Jiong  to  be  there.  MylVork 
is  done  :  J  have  done  with  ali  my  Friends  :  All  the  IVorld  is  nothing 
to  me.  I  long  to  he  in  Heaven,  praifing  and  glorifying  God 
tuith  the  holy  Angels  :   All  my  Defire  is  to  gloiify  Qod, 

During  the  whole  of   thefe  laft  two  Weeks  of  his  Life    he 
feem*d  to  continue  in  this  Frame  of  Heart,  ioofe  from  al/the 
World,   as  having  done  his  Work,   and   done  with  all  Things 
here  below,  having  nothing  to  do  but  to  die,  and  abiding  in  an 
earneft  Defire  and  Expectation  of  the  happy  Moment,  when 
his  Soul  fhould  take  it's  Flight,  and  go  to  a  State  of  Pcrfe£lioii 
of  Holinefs  and  perfe6t  glorifying  and  enjoying  God,  manifefted 
in  a  variety  ofExpreffions.  He  faid.  That  the  Confederation  of  thi 
Day  of  Deathy  and  the  Day  of  Judgment^  had  a  long  Time  been 
peculiarly  fweet  to  him.     He  from  Time  to  Time  fpake  of  his 
being  willing  to  leave  the  Body  and  the  VVorld  immediately,  that 
Day,  that  Night,  and  that  Moment,  if  it  was  the  Will  ofGod. 
He  alfo  was  much  in  expreffing  his  Longings  that  the  Church 
of  Chrifl  on  Earth  might  flourifh,  and  Chrift's  Kingdom  here 
might  be  advanced,  notwithftanding  he  was  about  to  leave  the 
Earthy  and  fhouid  not  with  his  Eyes  behold  the  defirableEvent,, 
nor  be  inftrumental  in  promoting  it.     He  faid  to  mejOneMorn- 
ing,  as  I  came  into  the  Room,  M^  Thoughts  have  been  employed 
en^he  old  dear  Theme,  The  Profperity  of  God's  Church  on  Eartho. 
jis  1  waked  out  of  Sleep,    1  was  led  to  cry  for  the  pouring  out  of 
God's  Spirit,  and  the  Advancement  of  Chriji*s  Kingdom,  which 
the  cear  Redeemer  did  and  fuffered  fo  much  for,     *Tis  that  efpeci-' 
ally  makes  me  long  for  it,—  He  exprelTed  much  Hope  that  a  glo- 
rious Advancement  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  was  near  at  Hand. 

He  once  told  me,  that  he  had  formerly  longed  for  the  Out'^ 
pouring  of  the  Spirit  of  God,  and  the  glorious  Times  of  the  Churchy 
end  hoped  they  were  coming  ;  andjhould  have  been  willing  to  havi. 
lived  to  promote  Religion  atthatTime,  if  that  had  been  the  Will  of 
God  ;  But  (  fays  he  )  I  am  willing  it  /hould  be  as  it  is  5  /  would 
not  have  the  Choice  to  make  for  my  felf,  for  ten  Thoufand  Worldu 
He  exprefTed  on  his  Death- Bed  a  full  Perfwafion,  that  he  fl^ould 
in  Heaven  fee  the  Profperity  of  the  Church  on  Earth,  and 
ihould  rejoyce  with  Chrift  therein  ;  And  the  Confideration  of 
it  feem'd  to  be  highly  pleafing  and  fatisfying  to  bis  Mind. 

He  alfo  ftill  dwelt  much  on  the  greatlmportance  of  iheWork 

of  Miniflers  of  the  Gofpel  -,  and  exprefs'd  his  Longings,  that 

xhey  might  he  filled  with  the  Spirit  of  God -y  and  manifefted  much 

Dcfirc  to  k^  l9mc  of  the  Neighbouring  Minifters.  whcxn  he 

■  Kk  bad 


248     -^/.  30:  T'^tf  L I F  E 

had  fome  Acquaintaiv:e  with,  and  whofe  finccre  Fricndfhip  he 
was  confident  of,  that  he  might  Gonverfe  freely  with  (hem  on 
that  Subjc6l:,  before  he  died.  And  it  fo  happened,  'hat  he  had 
Opportunity  with  fome  of  them,  according  to  his  Dclire. 

Another  Thing  that  Jay  much  on  hisHeart,  and  that  he  fpakc 
©f,  from  Time  to  Time,  ira  thefe  near  Approaches  ot  Death, 
was  the  rpiritual  Profperityof  his  own  Congregation  ofChriftian 
Indians  in  Ngw-Jer/ey  :  and  when  he  fpakeof  them,it  was  with 
peculiar  Tendcrnefs  ;  fo  that  his  Speech  would  be  prefently 
interrupted  and  drowned  with  Tears. 

Healfo  exprclTed  much  Satisfaction  in  the  Difpofals  of  Pro- 
vidence, with  Regard  to  the  Circumftances  of  his  Death  ;  par- 
ticularly that  God  had  before  his  Death  given  him  the  Oppor- 
tunity he  had  had  in  Bojion^  with  fo  many  confiderablePerfons, 
Miniflers  and  others,  to  give  in  hU  Tefitmony  for  God,  and 
againft  falfe  Religion,  and  many  Miftakes  that  lead  to  it,  and 
promote  it  ;  and  there  to  lay  befor^e  pious  and  charitable  Gen- 
tlemen, the  State  of  thelndians^  and  theirNeceffities,  to  fo  good 
EfFe6t ;  and  that  God  had  fince  given-  him  Opportunity  to 
write  to  them  further  concerning  thefe  Affairs  ;  and  to  write 
other  Letters  of  Importance,  that  he  hoped  might  be  of  good 
Influence  with  Regard  to  the  State  of  Religion  among  the  2ndi^ 
ens,  and  elfewhere,  after  his  Death.  He  exprefs'd  greatThank- 
f  ulnefs  to  God  for  his  Mercy  in  thefe  Things.  He  alfo  men- 
tioned it  as  what  he  accounted  a  merciful  Circumftance  of  his, 
Death,  that  he  fhould  die  here  \\  .  And  fpeaking  of  thefe 
Things, he  hid, God  had  granted  him  allhiiDeJtre  i  and  fignified, 
that  now  he  could  with  the  greater  Alacrity  leave  the  World.] 


d  The  Editor  takes  Leave  to  make  the  Remark,  that  when 
Mr.  Brainerd  v/as  at  'Bofton,  fick  nigh  unto  Death, 
it  was  with  Relu6iance  he  thought  of  dying  in  a  Place 
where  Funerals  are  often  attended  with  a  Fomp  &  Shaw^ 
which  (  efpecially  on  Occafion  of  his  own  )  he  was  veiy 
averfe  to  any  Appearance  of  :  And  tho'  it  was  with  fome 
Difficulty  he  got  his  Mind  reconciled  to  the  Profpe(5l  then 
before  him,  yet  at  laft  he  was  bro't  to  acquiefce  in  the 
Divine  Will,  with  Rcfpcd  to  this  Circumftance  of  his 
Departure.  However,  it  pleafed  God  to  order  theEvent 
fo  as  to  gratify  his  Defire^  which  he  had  exprefs'd,  of 
getting  back  to  Northampton^'w'wh  a  Vicw  particularly  t0j 
a  more  filcnt  and  privaie  BuriaU  "  ^        "" 

fcbndayj 


ef  M*.  David  Bralnerd.     A,D.  1747.^      249 

Monday,  Sept.  28.  I  was  able  to  read,  and  make  fome  few 
Corrections  in  my  private  Writings  ;  but  found  I  could  not 
write,  as  I  had  done  ;  I  found  my  feif  fenfibly  declined  in  all 
Refpedls.  It  has  been  only  from  a  little  .while  before  Noon, 
'till  about  one  or  two  o*Clock,  that  I  have  been  able  to  do  any 
Thing,  for  fome  Timepaft  :  Yet  this  refrefli'd  my  Heart,  that 
I  could  do  any  Thing,  either  publick  or  private,  that  1  hoped 
was  for  God. 

[  This  Evening,  he  was  fuppos'd  to  be  dying  :  He  tho*t  fo 
himfelf,  and  was  tho't  fo  by  thofe  who  were  about  him.  He 
feem'd  glad  at  the  Appearance  of  the  near  Approach  of  Death. 
He  was  almoft  Speechlefs,  but  his  Lips  appeared  to  move  ;  and 
one  that  fat  very  near  him, heard  him  utter  fuch  Expreffions  as 

thefe*  Comey    Lord  Jefus^  come  quickly. —  Oh,  ivhy  is  his 

Chariot  Jo  Ion j^  in  coming  !  — — *  After  he  revived,  he  blamed 
himfelf  for  having  been  too  eager  to  be  gone.  And  in  exprefling 
what  he  found  in  the  Frame  of  his  Mind  at  that  Time,  he  faid, 
he  then  found  an  inexpreflibly  fweetLove  to  thofe  that  he  look- 
ed upon  as  belonging  to  Chrijij  beyond  almoft  all  that  ever  he 
felt  before  ;  fo  that  it  feerrCd  (  to  ufc  his  own  Words  )  like 
a  little  Piece  of  Heaven  to  have  one  of  them  near  him.  And  being 
alked,  whether  he  heard  the  Prayer  that  was  (  at  his  Defire  ) 
made  with  him  ;  he  faid,  Tes^  he  heard  every  Word^  and  had  an 
uncommon  Senje  of  the  Things  that  were  uttered  in  that  Prayer ^and 
that  every  Word  reached  his  Heart, 

On  the  Evening  of  the  next  Day,  viz.  Tuefday,  Septemkig. 
As  he  lay  in  his  Bed,  he  feem'd  to  be  in  an  extraordinary 
Frame  ;  his  Mind  greatly  engaged  in  fweet  Meditations  con- 
cerning the  Profperity  of  Zion  :  There  being  prefent  here  at[ 
that  Time  two  young  Gentlemen  of  his  Acquaintance,  that 
were  Candidates  for  the  Mi^iif^ry^  he  defired  us  ali  to  unite  in 
finging  a  Pfalm  on  that  Subjed,  even  Z/Vi's  Profperity.  And 
on  his  Defire  we  fung  a  Part  of  the  CII  Pfalm.  This  feem'd 
much  to  refrefh  and  revive  him,  and  gave  him  new  Strength  ; 
fo  that,  tho*  before  he  could  fcarcely  (peak  at  all,  now  he  pro- 
ceeded, with  fome  Freedom  of  Speech,  to  give  his  dying  Coun- 
fels  to  thofe  two  young  Gentlemen  fore-mentioned,  relating  to 
their  Preparation  for,  and  Profecution  of  that  great  Work  of 
theMiniftry  they  were  defigned  for  ;  and  m  particular,  earneftly 
recommended  to  'cm  frequent  fccret  Fcjling  and  Prayer  :  And 
enforced  his  Counfel  with  Regard  to  this,  from  his  own  Experi- 
ence of  the  great  Comfort  and  BeneiKt  of  it  ;  which  (  faid  he  )  I 
(koMld  not  mention,  were  it  not  that  I  am  a  dying  Perfon.  And^ 

K  k  2  afttr 


ft5o    2Ei.  30:  ne  LIFE 

after  he  had  finifhed  his  Counfel,  he  made  a  Prayer,  in  the  Au*- 
dience  of  usall  ;  wherein,  befides  praying  for  this  Family,  for 
his  Brethren,  and  thofe  Candidates  ror  the  Miniftry,  and  for 
his  own  Congregation,  he  earneftly  piaycd  for  the  reviving  and 
flourifhingof  Reh'gionin  the  World, 

'Till  now,  he  bad  every  Day  fat  up  Part  of  the  Day  ;  but 
after  this,  he  never  tofe  from  his  Bed.  ] 

Wcdnelday,  S^pt.  30.  I  was  obliged  to  keep  my  Bed  the 
whole  Day, thro' Weaknefs.  However,redecm*d  a  littleTirae, 
and  with  the  Help  of  my  Brother,  read  and  cone6ted  about  a 
Dozen  Pages  in  mv  M.S.giving  an  Account  of  my  Converfion. 

Thurfday,  O^oh.  I.  I  endeavoured  again  to  do  fomething  by 
Way  of  writing,  but  foon  found  my  Powers  of  Body  and  Mind 
utterly  fail.  Felt  not  fo  f wee tly,  as  when  I  was  able  to  do 
fomething  that  1  hoped  would  do  fome  Good.  In  the  Evening, 
was  difcompofed  and  wholly  delirious  ;  but  it  was  not  long  be- 
fore God  was  pleafed  to  give  me  fomeSlecp,  and  fully  compofed 
my  Mind,  f  Oh,  blefTcd  be  God  for  his  great  Goodnefs  to  me, 
fmce  I  was  fo  low  at  Mr.  Brdmfield's,  on  Thurfday  Jung  18  laft 
pafl.  He  has,  except  thofe  few  Minutes,  given  me  the  clear 
Exercife  of  myReafon,  and  enabled  me  to  labour  much  for  him, 
in  Things  both  of  a  publick  and  private  Nature  ;  and  perhaps 
tp  do  more  Good,  than  I  fhould  have  done  if  1  had  been  well  j 
jbefides  the  comfortable  Influences  of  his  blcfTed  Spirit,  with 
which  he  has  been  pleafed  to  refrefh  my  Soul,  May  his  Name 
have  all  the  Glory  for  ever  and  ever.  Amen. 

Friday,  Qifob,  2.  My  Soul  was  this  Day,  at  Turns,  fwcctly 
fcton  God  :  1  longed  to  be  with  him ^  that  I  might  behold  hit 
Glory  ',  1  felt  fweetly  difpofed  to  commit  all  to  him,  even  my 
deareft  Fi lends,  my  dearclt  Flock,  and  my  abfent  Brother,  and 
all  my  Concerns  for  Time  and  Eternity.  Oh  that  hiiKing^om 
might  come  in  the  World  ;  that  they  might  all  love  and  glorify 
him,  for  what  he  is  in  himfclf  ;  and  that  the  blcfTed  Redeemer 
might /^^  of  the  Travail  of  his  Soul,  and  be  fatisfied^  Oh,  comt^ 
Lord  Jefus^  come  quickly.  Amen.  * 


'I"  From  this  Time  forward,  he  had  the  freeUfe  of  his  Rea- 
fon  'till  (he  Day  before  hisDeath  ;  excepting  that  at  fome 
times  he  appeared  a  little  lofl  for  a  Moment,at  fjrlt  waking 
out  of  Sleep. 

♦  Here  ends  his  Diary  :  Thefe  are  the  laji  fVordi^  that  are 
Written  in  it,  either  by  his  oyvn  Han«l,  or  by  any  other 
from  his  Mout;h?  f  The 


0/ Mr.  David  Braineri     A.D.  1747.      251 

f  The  next  Evening,  we  very  much  cxpe6led  his  Brother 
John  from  Neiv-Jerfey  ;  it  being  about  a  Week  after  theTime 
that  he  propofed  for  his  Return,when  he  went  away.  And  tho* 
our  Expectations  were  ftill  difappointed  ;  yet  Mr.  Brainerd 
fcem'd  to  continue  unmoved,  in  the  fame  calm  and  peaceful 
Frame,  that  he  had  before  manifcfted  ;  as  having  refigned  all  to 
God,  and  having  done  with  his  friends,  and  with  all  Things 
here  below. 

On  the  Morning  of  the  next  Day,being  LordVDay,  Osf.  4. 
as  ray  Daughter  Jeru(ha  (  who  chiefly  tended  him  )  came  into 
the  Room,  he  look'd  on  her  very  pleafantly,  and  faid.  Dear  Je- 
ruiha,  are  you  wiiiin^  to  part  with  me  ?  ■  ■■  1  am  quite  willing 
to  part  with  you  :  1  am  witling  to  part  with  all  my  Friends  :  I 
em  willing  to  part  with  my  dear  Brother  John  ;  altho'  J  love  him 
the  heji  of  any  Creature  living :  I  have  committed  him  and  all  my 
Friends  to  God, and  can  leave  them  with  God.  Tho\  if  J  thought 
1  Jhould  not  fee  you^and  be  happy  with  you  in  another  World,  I  could 
not  bear  to  part  with  you.  But  we  Jhall  fpend  an  happy  Eternity 
together  I   *  In  the  Evtning,as  one  came  into  the  Room  with  a 

Bible 


*  Since  this,  it  has  pleafcd  a  holy  and  fovereign  God  to  take 
away  this  my  dear  Child  by-Death,  on  the  14  of  February^ 
next  following  ;  after  a  fhort  Illnefs  of  five  Days  ;  in  the 
eighteenth  Year  of  her  Age.  She  was  a  Perfon  of  much 
the  fame  Spirit  with  Mr.  Brainerd,  She  had  conflantly 
taken  Care  of,and  tended  him  in  hisSicknefs,for  igWeeks 
before  hisDeath  ;  devoting  herfelf  to  it  with  greatDelighf, 
becaufe  fhe  look'd  on  him  as  an  eminentjServant  of  Jc- 
fus  Chrift.  In  thisTime,  he  had  much  Converfation  with 
heron  Things  of  Religion;  and  in  his  dying  State,  oftca 
exprefs'd  to  us,herParents,  his  greatSatisfadion  concerning 
her  true  Piety,  and  his  Confidence  that  he  fhould  meet 
her  in  Heaven  ;  and  his  high  Opinion  of  her,  not  only  as 
a  true  Chriflian,  but  a  very  eminent  Saint ;  One  whofe 
Soul  was  uncommonly  fed  and  cntertain'd  With  7'hings 
that  appertain  to  the  moft  fpiritual  experimental  and  dif- 
tinguifhingParts  of  Religion  ;  and  one  who  by  theTemper 
of  her  Mind  was  fitted  to  deny  herfelf  for  God, and  to  do 
Good,  beyond  any  young  VVoman  whatfoever  that  he 
Icnew  of.  S^e  had  manifefted  a  Heart  uncommonly  de- 
voted to  Gydj  in  the  Courfc  of  her  Lifc^  many  Years  be- 
fore 


^c,^    'ML'Xo:  5i&tfLIFE 


o 


Bible  in  hcrHand,he  exprcfo'd  himfelf  thus  ;  Oh, that  dtarBook  f 
that  lovely  Book  !  I  /hall  Joan  fet  it  open'd  f  The  A^yfliries  that 
are  in  it,  a%d  the  Myjieries  of  God's  Providence,  will  be  all  un- 
folded ! 

Hls  Diftemper  now  very  apparently  prey'd  on  hisVitals  in  an 
extraordinaryManner  :  Not  by  a  fudden  breaking  of  Ulcers  in  his 
Lungs, asat-Bff/^flWjbut  by  a  conftantDifchargeofpurulentMatter, 
in  greatQuantities :  So  that  what  he  bro't  up  by  Expedloration, 
fcem'd  to  be  as  it  were  Mouthfuls  of  almoft  clear  Pus  ;  which 
was  attended  with  very  great  inward  Pain  and  Diftrefs. 

On  Thurfday,  O^ok,  6.  He  lay,  for  a  confiderable  Time,as 
if  he  were  dying.  At  which  Time,  he  was  heard  to  utter,  in 
broken  Whifpers,  Tuch  Expreffions  as  thefe  ;  Ue  will  come^  he 
will  not  tarry.—  Ijhallfoon  be  in  Glory,--  1  /hall foon  glorifyGod 
with  the  Angeli. But  after  fome  Time  he  revived. 

The  next  Day,  viz.  VVedncfday,0^tf^.  7.  His  Brother  John 
arrived,  being  returned  from  New-j/erfey -,  where  he  had  been 
detained  much  longer  than  he  intended,  by  a  mortal  Sicknefs 
prevailing  amogg  tlieChriftian  Indians^znd  by  fome  otherThings 
in  their  Circumllances  that  made  his  Stay  with  them  ncceflary. 
Mr.  Brainerd  was  afFe(5ted  and  refrefhM  with  feeing  him,  and 
appeared  fully  fatisfied  with  the  Reafons  of  his  Delay  ;  feeing 
the  Intercft  of  Religion  and  of  the  Souls  of  his  People  required 

it. 

The  next  Day,  Thurfday,0^^^.  8.  He  was  in  great  Diftrefs 
and  Agonies  of  Body  ;  and  for  the  bigger  Part  of  the  Day,  was 
much  difordered  as  to  the  Exercife  of  his  Reafon.  In  theEven- 
ing,  he  was  more  compofed,  and  had  the  Ufe  of  his  Reafon 
well  ;  but  the  Pain  of  his  Body  continued  and  increafed.  He 
told  me,  it  wa^ jmpoffible  for  any  to  conceive  of  the  Diftrefs  he 
felt  in  his  Breaff.  He  manifefted  much  Concern  left  he  fhould 
difhonourGod  by  Impatience,under  his  cxtremeAgony  ;  which 
was  fucb,  that  he  faid,  the  Thought  of  enduring  it  one  Minute 
longer  was  almoft  infupportabie.  He  defired,that  others  would 
be  much  in  lifting  up  their  Hearts  continually  to  God  for  him, 
that  God  would  fupport  him,  and  give  him  Patience.    He  fig- 


fore  her  Death;  and  faid  on  her  Death-Bed,  that  /he  had 
ffotfeen  one  Minute  {or  fiveral  Tears,  wherein  /he  deftred  to 
live  one  Minute  longer,  for  the  fake  of  any  other  Good  in 
Life,  hut  doing  Good/ivin^  to  Gsd^  and  doin^  what  might  be 
far  hii. Glory,  - 


c/M.  David  Bralnerd.    A.D.  1747.     253 

Kificd,  that  he  expcdcd  to  die  that  Night ;  but  feem'd  to  fear 
a  longer  Delay  :  and  the  Difpofition  of  his  Mind  with  Regard 
to  Death  appeared  ftiH  the  fame  that  it  had  been  all  along.  And 
notwithftanding  his  bodily  Agonies,  yet  the  Intercft  ofZion  lay 
ftill  with  great  Weight  on  his  Mind  ;  as  appeared  by  fome  con- 
fiderablc  Difcourfe  he  had  that  Evening  1  with   the  Rev.  Mr. 
Biilms^  cnc  of  the  neighbouring  Minifters  (who  was  then  pre^ 
fent)  concerning  the  great  Importance  of  the  Work  of  theMi- 
niftry,  Iffc,  And  afterwards,  when  it  was  very  late  in  theNight, 
he  had  much  very  proper  and  profitable  Difcourfe  with  his 
Brother  yohn^  concerning  his  Congregation  in  l^ew-Jerfefydn^ 
the  Intereft  of  Religion  among  the  Indians,     In  the  latter  Pars 
of  the  Night,  his  bodily  Diftrefs  feemed  to  rife  to  a  greater 
Height  than  ever  ;  and  he  faid  to  thofe  then  about  him,  that  // 
was  another  Thing  io  die,  than  People  imagined  5  explaining  him- 
felf  to  mean  that  they  were  not  aware  what  bodily  Pain  and  An- 
guifli  is  undergone  before  Death.  Towards  Day,his  Eyes  fix'd  ; 
and  he  continued  lying  immovable,  'till  about  6  o'CJock  in  the 
Morning,  and  then  expired,  on  Friday,  O^ob,  9. 1747.   whea 
hisSouljas  we  may  well  conclude,was  received  by  his  dear  Lord 
and  Mafter,  as  an  eminently  faithful  Servant,  into  that  State  of 
Perfection  ofHolinef9,andFruition  ofGod, which  he  had  fo  often 
and  fo  ardently  longed  for  ;  and  was  welcom'd  by  the  glorious 
AfTembly  in  the  upper  World,  as  one  peculiarly  fitted  to  join 
them  in  their  bleiled  Employments  and  Enjoyments. 

Much  Refped  was  fhewn  to  bis  Memory  at  his  Funeral  ; 
which  was  on  the  Monday  following,  after  a  Sermon  preach/d 
the  fame  Day,  on  that  folemn  Occafion.  His  Funeral  was  at- 
tended by  eight  of  the  neighbouring  Minifters,  and  feventceb 
other  Gentlemen  of  liberal  Education,  and  a  great  Concourf«? 
of  People. 


^m  ®®3J®®®  ®®®®^®®®:€^®®  ®aj®  §  ®®®® 


Som- 


f5t?^,?^t^?'^^. 


"^-^m^^nm^jii^^^mm^^t'iw^n^ 


254  The  LIFE 


Some  further  REMAINS  of  the   Rev, 
Mr.  David  Brainerd. 


[I.]  A  Scheme  of  a  Dialogue  between  the  wznou^Powers 
and  /iffeEiions  of  the  Mind,  as  they  are  found  alter- 
nately whiipcring  in  the  godly  SouL  [Mentioned  in  his- 
Dwr;',  Feb.  3,  1744.] 

I.  ^nr^HE  Vnder/ianding  introduced,  (i)  As  difcovering  it'sr 
I  own  Excellency,  and  Capacity  of  enjoying  the  moft 
-^A-  fublime  Pleafure  and  Happinefs.  (2)  As  obferving 
it's  Defire  eq'ual  to  it's  Capacity,  and  incapable  of  being fatisfi- 
ed  with  any  Thing  that  will  not  fill  it  in  the  utmoftExtent  of  it's 
Exetcife.  ( 3  )  As  finding  it  felt  a  dependent  Thing,  not  Self- 
fufHcient  ;  and  confequently  unable  to  fpin  Happinefs  (  as  the 
Spider  fpins  it*s  Web)  out  of  it's  own  Bowels.  This  Self-fuffi- 
ciency  obferved  to  be  the  Property  and  Prerogative  of  GOD 
alone,  and  not  belonging  to  any  created  Being.  ( 4  )  As  in  vain 
ieeking  fublime  Pleafure,  Satisfa6lion,and  Happinefs  adequate  to 
it's  Nature,  amongft  created  Beings.  The  Search  and  Know- 
ledge of  the  Truth  in  the  natural  World  allowed  indeed  to  be  rc- 
I'refiiing  to  the  Mind  ;  but  iWW  failing  toafi'ord  compleat  Hap- 
pinefs. (5)  As  difcovering  the  Excellency  and  Glory  of  GOD, 
that  he  is  the  Fountain  of  Goodnefs,  and  Well-Spring  of  Happi- 
nefs, and  every  Way  fit  to  anfvver  the  enlarged  Defires  and  Crav- 
ings of  our  immortal  Souls. 

2.  The  Will  introduced,  as  nccefiarily,  yet  freely  chufing 
this  GOD  for  it's  fupreme  Happinefs  and  only  Portion,  fully 
complyingwith  theUnderffanding'sDi£tates,acquiefcing  inGOD 
as  the  belt  Go.od,  his  Will  as  the  belt  Rule  for  intelligent  Crea- 
tures, and  rejoicing  that  GOD  is  in  every  Rcfpc6l  juft  what  he 
is  ;  and  withal  chufing  and  delighting  to  be  a  dependent  Crea- 
ture, always  fubjed  to  this  GOD,  not  afplring  afterSclf-fuffict- 
cAcy  aad  Suprc/nacy,   h\x\  acqui^fciiig  ill  ihs  ceaUary. 

3»  hl^^^X 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerdi  255 

3.  Ardent  Love  ox  Vefire  introduced,  as  paflionately  longing 
to  pleafe  and  glorify  the  Divine  Being,  to  be  in  every  Refpeft 
conformed  to  him,  and  in  that  Way  to  enjoy  him.  This  Love 
or  Defire  reprefented  as  moft  genuine  ;  not  induced  by  mean 
and  mercenary  Views;  not  primarily  Springing  from  felfifh 
Hopes  of  Salvation,  whereby  the  divine  Glories  would  be  Sacri- 
!ficed  to  the  Idol  Self ;  not  arifmg  from  a  llavifh  Fear  of  Divine 
Anger  in  Cafe  of  NegledV,  nor  yet  from  Hopes  of  feeling  the 
Sweetnefs  of  that  tender  and  pleafant  Pailicn  of  Love  in  one's 
ownBreall;  but  from  a  juftEfteem  of  the  beauteousObjed  belov- 
ed. This  Love  further  reprefented,  as  attended  with  vehement 
Longings  after  the  Enjoyment  of  it's  Objedl,  but  unable  to  find 
by  what  Means. 

4.  The  Underjianding  again  introduced, as  informing(r.)Hovv 
God  might  have  been  enjoyed, yea, how  hemuft  necefTarily  have 
been  enjoyed,  had  not  Man  fm*d  againft  him  ;  that  as  there  was 
Knowledge ^Likenejs^zn^Love^{o  there  mufl  needs  beEnjoyment, 
while  there  was  no  Impediment.  (2.)  How  he  may  be  en- 
joyed in  fome  Meafure  now,  vi%.  by  the  fame  Knowledge  be- 
getting Likenefi  and  Lovt^  which  will  be  anfwer'd  with  Returns 
of  Love^  and  the  Smiles  of  God's  Countenance,  which  are 
better  than  Life.  (  3.  )  How  .God  may  be  perfetSlly  en- 
joyed, vtz.  by  the  Soul's  perfedt  Freedom  from  Sin.  This 
perfe£l  Freedom  never  obtain'd  'till  Death  ;  and  then  not  by 
any  unaccountable  Means,  or  in  any  unheard-of  Manner  ;  but 
the  fame  by  which  it  has  obtain'd  fome'Likenefs  to  andFruition 
of  God  in  thisWorld,  viz.  a  clear  Manifeflation  of  him.     . 

5.  Holy  Defire  appears,  and  enquires  why  the  Soul  may  not 
be  perfectly  holy  ;  and  fo  perfecSl  in  theEnjoymentofGod  here  ; 
and  exprefles  molt  infatiableThirftinga  after  fucha  Temper, and 
fuch  Fruition,  and  moft  confummate  BlefTednefs. 

6.  Under  [landing  again  appears,  and  informs,  that  God 
defigns  that  thofe  whom  he  fan6tifics  in  Part  here,  and  intends 
for  immortalGIory,fhall  tarry  a  while  in  this  prefent  evilWorld, 
that  their  own  Experience  of  Temptations  ^c,  may  teach  'em 
how  great  the  Deliverance  is,  which  God  bas  wrought  for  'em, 
that  they  may  be  fwallowed  up  in  Thankfulnefs  and  Admira- 
tion toEternity  ;  as  alfo  that  they  may  be  inftrumental  of  doing 
Good  to  their  Fellow-Men.  Now  if  they  u-ere  perfedly 
holy  i^c,  a  World  of  Sin  would  not  be  a  fit  Habitation  for 
them  :  and  further, fuch  Manifeftations  of  God  as  are  necelTary 
compleatly  to  fandify  the  Soul,  would  be  infupportable  to  the 
Body,  fo  that  we  can't  fee  God  and  live, 

L  1  7.  Holy 


2^6  The  LIFE 

7  Hdly  Impatience  is  next  introduced  jComplaining  of  thcSIns 
and  Sorrows  of  Life,  and  almoft  repining  at  the  Diftance  of  a 
State  of  Perfection,  uneafy  to  fee  and  feel  the  Hours  hang  (o 
dull  and  heavy,  and  almofl  concluding  that  the  Temptations, 
Hardfhips,  Difappointments,Impcrfe<5tionr,  and  tediousEmploy- 
inents  of  Life  will  never  come  to  a  happy  Period. 

8.  Tender  Confcience  comes  in,  and  meekly  reproves  the 
Complaints  of  Impatience  ;  urging  how  careful  and  watchful  we 
ought  to  be,  left  we  fhould  oiFend  the  divine  Being  with  Com- 
plaints ;  alledging  alfo  the  Fitnefs  of  our  waiting  patiently  upon 
God  for  all  we  want,  and  that  in  a  Way  of  doing  and  fufFering; 
and  at  the  fame  Time  mentioning  the  Barrennefsof  the  Soul, 
how  much  precious  Time  it  mifimproved,  and  how  little  it  has 
enjoyed  of  God,  compared  with  what  it  might  have  done  ;  as 
alio  fuggefling  how  frequently  impatient  Complaints  fpring 
frcm  nothing  better  than  Self-love,  want  of  Refignation,  and 
a  greater  Reverence  of  the  Divine  Being. 

9.  Judgment  OT  found  Mind  ntxt  z^^td^xs^  and  duly  weighs- 
ihe  Complaints  of  Impatience,  and  the  gentle  Admonitions  of 
tender  Confcience^  and  impartially  determines  between  'em.  On 
the  one  hand,  it  concludes,  that  we  may  always  be  impatient 
with  Sin  ;  and  fuppofer,  that  we  may  alfo  with  fuch  Sorrow, 
Pain,  and  Difcouragement,  as  hinder  our  Purfuitof  Holinefs, 
tho'  they  arife  from  the  weaknefsof  Nature.  It  allows  us  to 
be  impatient  of  the  Diftance  at  which  we  ftand  fipm  a  State 
of  Perfeftion  and  Blefiednefs.  It  further  indulges  Impatience 
at  the  Delay  of  Time,  when  we  deiire  the  Period  of  it  for  no 
other  End  than  that  we  may  with  Angels  be  employed  in  the 
mofl  lively  fpiritual  A6ls  of  Devotion,  and  in  giving  all  polTible 
Glory  to  him  that  lives  forever.  Temptations  and  finful  Im- 
perfe6tions,  it  thinks  we  may  juftly  be  uneafy  with  ;  and  Dif- 
appointments,  at  leafl  thofe  that  relate  to  our  Hopes  of  Com- 
munion with  God,  and  growing  Conformity  to  him.  And  as 
to  the  tedious  Employments  and  Hardfliips  of  Life,  it  fuppofes 
feme  Longin2;  for  the  End  of  'em  not  inconfiftent  with  a  Spirit 
of  FaithfulneTs,  and  a  chearful  Difpofition  to  perform  the  ore 
and  endure  the  other  :  It  fuppofes,  that  a  faithful  Servant,  vho 
fully  defigns  to  do  all  he  poiribly  can,  may  ftiil  jufUy  long  for 
theEvening  ;  and  that  no  rationalMan  would  blame  his  kind  and 
tender  vSpoufcJf  he  perceived  her  longing  to  be  with  him, while 
yetFaithfulnefs  &:Duty  to  him  might  fiill  induce  her  to  yield, for 
the  prefent,  to  remain  at  a  painful  Diftance  from  him. —  On 
the  other  Hand, it  approves  of  theCaution,  Care  and  Watchful- 

fiefg 


ef  Mr.  David  Brainerd.  257 

ncfs  offender  Cen/cience^le^  thcDivine  Being  fhould  be  offended 
with  impatient  Complaints  :  It  acknowledges  theFitnefsof  our 
waiting  upon  God,  in  a  Way  of  patient  doing  and  fufFering  ;  But 
fuppofes  this  very  confiftent  with  ardent  Defires  to  depart  and  to 
h  with  Chriji*  It  owns  it  fit  that  we  fhould  always  remember 
our  own  Barrennefs,and  thinks  alfo  that  we  fhould  be  impatient 
of  it,  and  confequently  long  for  a  State  of  Freedom  from  it  ; 
and  this,  not  fo  much  that  we  may  feel  the  Happinefs  of  it,  but 
that  God  may  have  the  Glory.  It  grants,  that  impatient  Com- 
plaints often  fpring  from  Self-love,  and  Want  of  Rcfignation  and 
Humility.  Such  as  thefe  it  difapproves  ;  and  determines,  we 
fhould  be  impatient  only  of  Abfence  from  God,&  Diflanct  from 
that  State  and  Temper  wherein  we  may  moft  glorify  him. 

10.  Godly  Sorrow  introduced,  as  makir^g  her  fad  Moan,  not 
fo  much  that  fhe  is  kept  from  the  free  Pofleffion  and  full  Enjoy- 
ment of  Happinefs,  but  that  God  muft  be  difhonoured  j  the 
Soul  being  fiill  in  a  World  of  Sin,  and  itfelf  imperfcd.  She 
here,  with  Grief,  counts  over  paft  Faults, prefent  Temptations, 
and  Fears  for  the  future. 

11.  Hope  or  holy  Confidence  ^^^^^2^x5,  and  feems  perfwaded 
that  nothing  fnall  ever  fepar ate  the  Soul  from  the  Love  of  God  in 
Chrijl  Jsfus.  It  expedls  divine  Affiftance  and  Grace  fufficient 
for  all  the  doing  and  fufFering- Work  of  Time,  and  that  Death 
will  ere  long  put  a  happy  Period  to  all  Sin  and  Sorrow  >  and 
fo  takes  Occafion  to  rejoyce. 

12.  Godly  Fear,  ox  holy  Jealoufy  here  fleps  in,  and  fuggef!s 
feme  timorous  Apprehenfions  of  the  Danger  of  Deception  ; 
mentions  the  Deccitfulnefs  of  the  Heart,  the  great  Influence  of 
irregular  Self- Love  in  a  fallen  Creature  ;  enquires  whether  it 
felf  is  not  likely  to  have  fallen  in  with  Delufion,  fince  the  Mind 
is  fo  dark,  and  fo  little  of  GOD  appears  to  the  Soul  ;  and  que- 
ries whether  all  it's  Hopes  of  perfevering  Grace  mayn't  bePre- 
fumption,  and  whether  it's  confident  Expedations  of  meeting 
Death  as  a  B^iend,  mayn't  ifTue  in  Difappointment. 

13.  Hereupon,  ^^^^/<7«  appears,  and  minds  the  Perfon  of 
his  paft  Experiences  ;  as  to  the  preparatory  Work  of  Convidti- 
on  and  Humiliation  ;  TheView  he  thrn  had  of  the  Impoflibility 
of  Salvation, from  himfqlf,  or  any  created  Arm  :  TheManifefla- 
tion  he  has  hkewife  had  of  the  Glory  of  GOD  in  Jefu:  Chri/i  : 
How  he  then  admired  that  Glory,  and  chofe  that  GOD  for  his 
only  Portion,  becaufe  of  the  Excellency  and  Amiablenefs  he  dif- 
covered  in  him  ;  not  from  flavifh  Fear  of  being  damned,  if  he 
did  not,  nor  from  bafc  and  mercenary  Hopes  of  faving  himrelf; 

L  1  2  bat 


258  The  hlFE 

bat  from  a  juft  Efteem  of  that  beauteoas  and  glorious  ObJ€(£F: 
As  alfo  how  he  had  from  Time  toTime  rejoyced  and  acqaiefced 
in  GOD,  for  what  he  is  in  himfelf ;  being  delighted,  thai  he  is 
infinite  in  Holincfs,  Juftice,  Power,  Sovereignty,  as  well  as  in 
Mercy,  Goodnefs  and  Love  :  How  he  has  iikewifc  ,  Scores  of 
Times,  felt  his  Soul  mourn  for  Sin,  for  this  very  Reafon,becaufe 
it  is  contrary  and  grievous  to  GOD  ;  yea, how  he  has  mourned 
over  one  vain  and  impertinent  Thought,  when  he  has  been  fo 
far  from  Fear  cf  the  divine  vindidtive  Wrath  for  it,  that  on  the 
Contrary  he  has  enjoyed  the  higheft  Affurance  of  the  divine  cver- 
lafting  Love  :  How  he  has,  from  Time  to  Time,  delighted  in 
the  Commands  of  God,  for  their  own  Purity  and  Perfedlion, 
and  longed  exceedingly  to  be  conformed  to  'cm, and  even  to  be 
holy  as  GOD  ii  holy  ;  and  counted  it  prefent  Heaven,  to  be  of 
a  heavenly  Temper  :  How  he  has  frequently  rejoyced, to  think 
of  being  for  ever  fubje6l  to,  &  dependent  on  GOD  ;  account- 
ing it  infinitely  greater  Happiijefs  to  glorify  God  in  a  State  of 
Sabjed:ion  to,  and  Dependence  on  him,  than  to  be  a  god  him- 
felf ;  and  how  Heaven  it  felf  would  be  no  Heaven  to  him, if  he 
could  hot  there  be  every  Thing  thatGOD  would  have  him  be. 

14.  Upon  this,  Spiritual  SenJationhQ\i\g2iVf2ikQ6^  comzs  lily 
and  declares  that  She  now  feels  U  taftes  that  theLord  is  gracious^ 
that  he  is  the  onlyfupreme  Good,  the  only  Soul-fatisfying  Hap- 
pinefs  ;  that  he  is  acompleat,  felf-fufficient,  and  almighty  Por- 
tion. She  whifpers.  Whom  have  1  in  Heaven  but  this  GOD, 
i^.$  dear  and  blelFed Portion  j  ana  there  is  none  upon  Earth  I  defire 
befides  him.  Oh,  *tisHeaven,to  pleafehmand  to  bejuft  wbat^ 
be  would  have  me  be  !  O  that  my  Soul  were  boly,asGodis  holy  f* 
O  that  it  was  pure^  as  Chriji  is  pure  ;  and  perfe£f  as  my  Father  in 
,  Heaven  isperfecl.  Thefe  are  the  fweeteft  Commands  in  God's 
Book,  comprizing  all  others  j  and  (hall  I  break  *em  ?  Muft  I 
'break'  'cm  ?  Am  1  under  a  fatal  NccefTity  of  it,  as  long  as  I  live 
in  this  VV(>rld  ?  Oh  my  Soul !  Wo,  Wo  is  me,  that  I  am  a 
Sinner  !  Bccaufe  I  now  neccfiarily  grieve  and  ofFcnd  this  blcfTed 
GOD,  who  is  infinite  in  Goodnefs  and  Grace.  Oh,methinks, 
fhould  he  pimifh  me  for  my  Sins,  it  would  not  wound  myHeart 
fo  deep  to  ofF^nd  him  ;  But,  iho*  1  fin  continually,  he  continu- 
ally repeats  his  KmdntTs  towards  me  !  Oh,  methinks  I  could 
b'iar  any  SufFerincy ;  hut  how  can  1  bear  to  grieve  and  difhonouc 
this  bLfTed  C^od  !  f^ow  fiiall  f  give  ten^Thoufand  Tin^s  more 
Hr>nour  to  him?  What  fliall  I  do,  to  glorify  and  wofitiip  this 
befi  of  Beings  ?  O  that  1  could  confecrate  my  feU,Soul  andBo.dy, 
to  his  Service  for  ever.     O  that  I  could  give  up  my  felf  to  hiniv 


iff  Mr.  David  Brainerd,  259 

fo  as  never  more  to  attempt  to  be  my  own,  or  to  have  any  Will 
or  AfFedlions  that  are  not  perfedlly  conformed  to  his.  But  Oh 
Alas,  Alas  !  I  can*!,  I  feel  I -can't,  be  thus  entirely  devoted  to 
GOD  :  I  can't  live  and  fm  not.  O  yevf/z^^/i,do  ye  glorify  him 
incefTantly  :  If  poflible,exert  your  felves  ftiJi  more,  in  more  live- 
ly and  ardent  Devotion  :  If  poflible,  proftrate  your  felves  ftill 
lower  before  the  Throne  of  the  blefTed  King  of  Heaven  :'  I  long 
to  bear  a  Part  with  you,  and  if  it  were  poffible,  to  help  you. 
Yet  when  we  have  done,  we  (hall  not  be  able  to  ofFer  the  ten 
Thoufandth  Part  of  the  Homage  he  is  worthy  of.  While /j&ir/- 
tual  Senfation  whifpered  thefe  Things,  Fear  and  Jealoufy  were 
greatly  overcome  ;  and  the  Soul  replied,  A^cw  1  know ^  and  am 
ojfured^  &c.  and  again  it  welcom'd  Death  as  a  Friend,  faying, 
O  Deaths  where  is  thy  Stingy  Sec, 

15.  Finally,  Boly  Re/olui ion  concludes  the  Dlfcourfe,  fixedly 
determining  io  follow  hard afterGOD^znd  continually  to  purfue 
a  Life  of  Conformity  to  him.  And  the  better  to  purfue  this,en- 
joining  it  on  the  Soul  always  to  remember,  that  God  is  the  on- 
ly fource  of  Happinefs,  that  his  Will  is  the  only  Rule  of  Re£li- 
t^dc  to  an  intelligent  Creature,  that  Earth  has  nothing  in  it 
deferable  for  it  felf,orany  further  than  GOD  is  feen  in  it  j  a.nd 
that  the  Knowledge  of  God  in  Chrift,  begetting  and  maintain- 
ing Love,  and  mortifying  fenfual  and  flefhly  Appetites,  is  the 
Way  to  be  holy  on  Earth,;  and  fo  to  be  attempered  to  the  com- 
pleat  Holinefs  of  the  heavenly  World. 


[II.  ]  Somt  gloomy  zn^  defponding  Thoughts  of  a  Soul 
under  ConviSions  of  Sin^  and  Concern  for  it's  eter- 
nal Salvation. 

I.  T  Believe,  my  Cafe  h  finz^ular^   that  none  ever  had  fo  many 
*  ftrange  and  different  Thoughts  and  Feelings  as  I. 

2.  I  have  been  concern'd  much  longer  than  many  others^  that 
I  have  known  or  read  of,  who  have  been  favingly  converted^  and 
yet  I  am  left. 

3.  I  have  withflood  the  Power  of  ConviSiiom  a  longTime,and 
therefore  I  fear,  I  fhall  be  finally  Xtit  of  God. 

4.  I  never  (hall  be  converted,  without  (ironger  Convidlions, 
and  greater  Terr  on  of  Confcience. 

5*  f  don*r^im  at  the  Glory  of  Goi>  in  any  Thing  I  do,  and 
ifesrefore  I  Wn't  hope  for  Mercy. 
*"  '■  n.  The 


26o  r^^  L I F  E 

6.  I  don't  fee  the  Evil  Nature  of  Ji/r,  nor  the  Sin  of  my  N<?- 
iure  ;  and  therefore  I  am  difcouraged. 

7.  The  more  IJirive,  the  moie  blind  and  hard  my  Heart  is, 
and  the  worfe  I  grow  continually. 

g.  I  fear,  God  never  {hew*d  Mtrcy  to  one  Co  vile  as  I. 

9.  I  fear,  I  ^mnoieleSfedy   and  therefore  muft  pcrifli. 

10.  I  fear,  the  Day  of  Grace  i^paji  with  me. 

11.  I  fear,  I  have  committed  the  unpardonable  Sin. 

12.  lam  an  0/^  Sinner  ;  and  if  God  had  defigned  Mercy  for 
mc,  he  would  have  called  me  Home  to  himfclf  before  now* 


[  III.  ]  Some  Signs  of  Godlinefs. 

The  diftinguilhing  Marks  of  a  trueChriliiatty  taken  from 
one  of  my  old  Manufcripts  ;  where  I  wrote  as  / 
felt  and  experienced^  and  not  from  any  conftdcrablc 
Degree  of  dodrinal  Knowledge,  or  Acquaintance 
with  the  Sentiments  of  others  in  this  Point. 

I.   T1 E  has  a  true  KnowUige  of  the  Glory   and  Excellency  of 
•"■  God,  that  he  is  moft  worthy  to  be  loved  and  praifcd 
for  his  own  divine  Perfections.  Pfal.  CXLV.  3. 

2.  God    is  his  Portion.  Pfal.   LXXIII.  25.    An4  God's 

Glory^  his  great  Concern.   Matth.  VI.  22. 

3.  Holinefs  is  his  Delight ;  nothing  he  io  much  longs  for^as  to 
be  holy,  as  God  is  holy.  PhiL  III.  9, 12. 

4.  Sin  is  his  greateft  Enemy.  This  he  hates,  for  it's  own 
Nature,  for  what  it  is  in  it  felf,  being  contrary  to  a  holy  GOD. 
yer.  11.  I.  And  confequently  he  hates  all  Sin.  Rom.  ^IL  24, 
I  Job.  III.  9. 

5.  The  Laws  of  GOD  alfo  are  his  Delight.  P/al.CXlX.gy. 
Ran.  VII.  22.  Thefebeobferves,  not  out  of  Conftraint,  fron\ 
a  fervile  Fear  of  Hell  ;  but  they  are hisChoice.  Pfal.CXlX.'^o. 
The  ftri(Sl  Obfervance  of  them  is  not  his  Bondage, J?ut  his  great- 
eft  Liberty,  v^r.  45, 


flV.]  LETTERS^ 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.  261 

t  IV.  ]  LETTERS,  written  liy  Mr.  Brainerd  to 
his  Friends. 


ADVERTISEMENT. 

MR.  Brainerd  had  a  largeAcquaintance  and  Correfpondence, 
efpecially  in  the  latter  Part  of  his  Life,  and  he  did  much 
at  writing  Letters  to  his  abfentFriends ;  but  the  moft  of  his  Ac- 
quaintance living  at  a  great  Diftance  from  me,  I  have  not  beea 
able  to  obtain  Copies  of  many  that  he  wrote :  However,  the 
greater  Part  of  thofe  which  I  have  fcen,are  fuch  as  appear  to  me 
of  profitable  Tendency-,  and  worthy  of  the  publick  View  :  I 
have   therefore  here  added  a  few  of  his  Letters. 

N.  B.  Several  of  thefe  which  follow,  are  not  publifhcd  at 
large,  becaufe  fome  Parts  of  them  were  concerning  particular 
Affairs  of  a  private  Nature. 

No.  I.  To  his  Brother  'John,  then  a  Student  at  TaU'CoUege 
in  New-  Haven, 

Kaunaumeek,  April  30.  1743. 
Dear  Brother, 
T  Should  teil  you,  /  long  to  fee  ycu^  but  that  my  ownExperience 
■^  has  taught  me,  there  is  no  Happinefs,  &  picnarySatisfadlion 
to  be  enjoyed,  in  earthly  Friends ^iho'  ever  fo  near  and  dear,  or 
in  any  other  Enjoyment,  that  is  not  God  himfelf.  Therefore, 
if  the  God  of  all  Grace  would  be  pleafed  gracioufly  to  afford  us 
each  his  Prefence  and  Grace^  that  we  may  perform  the  Work, 
and  endure  the  Trials  he  calls  us  to,  in  a  moft  diflreiTing  tire- 
fome  Wiidernefs,  'till  we  arrive  at  our  Journey's  End  ;  the  lo- 
cal Diftance,  at  which  we  are  held  from  each  other  at  the  pre- 
fent,  is  a  Matter  of  no  great  Moment  or  Importance  to  either  of 

lis.     But  Alas  !  The  Prefence  of  God  is  wha!:I  want. — • 

I  live  in  ihe  moft  lonely  melancholvD^/^r/,  about  18  Miles  from 
Albany  (for  it  v^tas  not  thought  belt  that  I  fhould  go  to  Delaware- 
River,  23  I  believe  1  hinted  to  you  in  a  Letter  from  New-York.) 
I  board  with  a  poor  Scotch- Adan  :  His  Wife  can  talk  fcarce  any 
Englijh,  My  Diet  confifts  moflly  of  Harty-Pudding,boirdCorn, 
and  Bread  baked  in  the  Aflies,  and  fomctimes  a  little  Meat  and 
Butter.  My  Lodging  \s  a  llttlfe  Heap  of  Scraw,  laid  upon  feme 
Boards,  a  little  Way  from  the  Ground  :  Fcr  it  is  a  Log-Room^ 
_  without 


262  TZ»^  L  I  F  E 

without  any  Floor,  that  I  lodge  in.  My  PTork  is  exceeding 
hard  and  difficult :  I  travel  on  Foot  a.  Mile  and  half,  the  ^orft 
of  Way,    ajmoft  daily,  and  back   again  ;   for  I  live  (o  far  from 

rny  Indians.' I  have  not  feen  an  Engii/h  Perfon  thisMonth. — 

Thefe,  and  many  otherCircumftances,  as  uncomfortable,attend 
me  ;  and  yet  my  fpiritualConJliSis  and  DiflreJJes  fo  far  exceed  2M 
thefe,  that  i  fcarce  think  of  them,  or  hardly  mind  but  that  I 
am  entertain'd  in  the  mofl  fumptuous  Manner.  The  Lord 
grant  ihatl  may  learn  to  endure Hardnejs^ai a goodSoidier  of  Jesvs 
Christ.  As  to  my  Succefs  here,  I  can't  fa>  much  as  yet  : 
The  Indians  faem  generally  kind,  and  well  difpofed  towards  me, 
and  are  moftly  very  atteotive  to  my  Inflrudtions,  and  feem 
willing  to  be  taught  further:  Two  or  three,  I  hope,  are  under 
fome  Convi^ions  ;  But  there  feems  to  be  little  of  the  fpecial 
Workings  of  the  divine  Spirit  among  them  yet  ;  which  gives 
xne  many  a  Heart-finking  Hour.  Sonletimes  I  hope,  God  has 
abundant  Blefiings  in  Store  for  them  and  me  ;**but  at  other 
Times  I  am  fo  over- whelmed  with  Diftrefs,  that  I  can't  fee  how 
his  Dealings  with  me  are  confittent  with  Covenant- Love  and 
Faithfulnefs,  and  I  fay,  Surely  his  tender  Mercies  are  clean  gone 

for  ever.' —But  hov/ever,  I  fee,  I  needed  all   this  Chajiifement 

already  :  'Tis good  forme,  that  I  have  endured  thefe  Trials,  and 
have  hitherto  little  or  no  apparent  Succefs.  Don't  be  difcou- 
raged  by  my  DiftrefTes  :  I  was  under  great  Diflrefs,  at  Mr. 
Pomroy^s^  when  I  faw  you  laft ;  but  God  has  been  with  me  of  a 
Truth,  fince  that :  He  helped  me  fometimes  fweetly  at  Long- 
Jfland,  and  elfewhere.  But  let  us  always  remember,  that  we 
muft  through  much  Tribulation  enter  mto  God's  eternal  Kingdom 
of  Reft  and  Peace;  The  Righteous  are  fiarcely  faved  :  Tis  an 
infinite  Wonder,  that  we  have  well-grounded  Hopes  of  being 
faved  at  all.  For  my  Part,  I  feel  the  moft  vile  of  any  Creature 
living  ;  and  I  am  fure  fometimes,   there  is  not  fuch  another  ex- 

ifting  on  this  Side  HelL Now,  all  you  can  do  for  me, is,  to 

pray  incefTantly,  that  God  would  make  me  humble,   holy,  rc- 

figned,  and  heavenly-minded.,  by  all  my  Trials. Bejirong 

in  the  Lord,  and  in  the  Power  of  his  Might.  Let  us  run,  wre/ile 
^u^  fight,  that  we  may  win  the  Prize,  and  obiaift  that  compleat 
Happinefs,  to  be  Holy  as  God  is  Holy.  So,  wifhing  and  praying 
that  you  may  advance  in  Learning  and  Grace,  and  be  fit  for 
fpecial  Service  for  God,     I  remain 

Ygur  afFei^ionate  Brother. 

/).   Braintrd, 


ef  Mr,  David  BraincrdJ  2^j? 

No.  2.    To  his  Brother  John,  at  Yak-College  in  New-Haven. 
kaunaumeek,  D^c^m^^r  27.  lyA-?. 
Dear  Brother,  ^      ^^*^ 

I  Long  to  fee  you,  and  know  how  you  fare  in  your  Journey 
thro'  a  World  of  inexprefTible  Sorrow,  where  we  are  com- 
pafsM  about  with  Vanity^  Confufton2Lndi  Fexation  of  Spirit,  I  am 
mors  weary  of  Life,  I  think, than  ever  I  was.  The  whole  IForld 
appears  to  me  like  a  huge  Vacuum^  a  vaft  empty  Space,  whence 
nothing  defirable,or  at  leaft  fatisfa£tory,can  poffibly  be  derived  ; 
and  I  long,  daily  to  die  more  and  more  to  it  ;  even  tho*  I  ob- 
tain not  that  Comfort  from  fpiritual  Things,  which  I  earneftly 
defire.  Worldly  PJeafures,  fuch  as  flow  from  Greatnefs, Riches, 
Honours,  &  fenfualGratifications,are  infinitely  worfe  than  none. 
May  the  Lord  deliver  us  more  and  more  from  thefe  Vanities,  I 
have  fpent  moft  of  the  Fall  and  Winter  hitherto  in  a  very  weak 
State  of  Body  ;  and  fometimcs  under  preffing  inward  Trials 
and  fpiritual  Conflids  :  but  having  obtained  Help  from  God,  1 
continue  to  this  Day  ;  and  am  now  fometbing  better  in  Health, 
than  I  was  fometime  ago.  I  find  nothing  more  conducive  to 
a  Life  of  Chri/iianity,  than  a  diligent,  induftrious  and  faithful 
Improvement  of  precious  Time,  Let  us  then  faithfully  per- 
form that  Bufmefs,  which  is  allotted  to  us  by  divineProvidencc, 
to  the  utmoft  of  our  bodily  Strength,  and  mentalVigour.  Why 
(hould  we  rink,and  grow  difcouragedjWith  any  particularTrials, 
and  Perplexities,  we  are  called  to  encounter  in  the  World  I 
Death  and  Eternity  are  juft  before  us  ;  a  few  toiling  Billows? 
more  will  waft  us  into  the  World  of  Spirits,  and  we  hope  (thro" 
infinite  Grace  )  into  endlefs  Pleafures,  and  uninterrupted  Reft 
and  Peace.  Let  us  then  run  with  Patience  the  Race  fet  before  us^ 
Hcb.  xii.  I,  2.  And  Oh  that  we  could  depend  more  upon  the 
living  GOD,  and  lefs  upon  our  own  Wifdom  and  Strength.- — • 
Dear  Brother,  may  the  God  of  all  Grace  comfort  your  Heart, 
and  fucceed  your  Studies, and  make  you  an  Inftrument  of  Good 
to  his  People  in  your  Day,  This  is  the  conftant  Prayer  of 
Your  afFedlionate  Brother : 

David  Brainerd. 

No.  3.     To  his  Brother  Ifrael,  at  Haddam, 

Kaunaumeeky<j«.  21.  1743,4 
My  Dear  Brother, 

TPHere  is  but  one  Thing,  that  defervesour  hlgheft 

Care  and  mofl  ardent  Defires ;  and  that  is,  that 
Wcmay  anfyyer  the  great^^(^,for  which  wc  were  made  ;  vi%.t<% 

M  m  g^'i^^fy 


^■- 


254  ^he  LIFE 

glorify  that  God,  who  has  given  us  ourBeings  and  all  ourCom- 
forts,  and  do  all  the  GW,  we  pofiibly  can,  to  our  Fellow-Men, 
while  we  live  in  the  World  :  And  verily  Life  is  not  worth  the 
having,  if  it  be  not  improved  for  this  noble  End  and  Purpofe* 
Yet,  '^las,  how  little  is  this  thdlight  of  among  Mankind  !  Moft 
Men  Teem  to  live  to  therrifelves^  without  much  Regard  to  the 
Glory  of  God,  or  the  Good  of  their  Fellow-Creatures;  ihey 
earneftly  derire,and  eagerly  purfue  after  theRiches,theHonoufS, 
and  the  Pieafures  of  Life, as  if  they  really  fuppofed,  thatWealth, 
or  Greatnefs,  or  Merriment,  could  make  their  immortal  Souls 
happy.  Bur,  alas,  what  falfe  and  delufive  Dreams  are  thefe  ! 
And  howMiferable  will  thofe  ere  long  be,  who  are  not  awaked 
out  of  them,  to  fee,  that  all  their  Happinefs  confifls  in  living  to 
GcD,  and  becoming  holy  as  he  is  holy  !  Oh,  may  you  never  fall 
into  the  Tempers  and  Vanities,*  the  Senfuality  and  Folly  of  the 
prefent  World.  You  aie,  by  divine  Providence,  left  as  it  were 
tf/fl?;^  in  a  wide  World,  to  a6l  for  your  felf  :  Be  fure  then  to 
remember,  'tis  a  World  of  Temptation,  You  have  no  earthly 
Parents  to  be  the  Means  of  forming  your  Youth  to  Piety  and 
Vcrtue,  by  their  pious  Examples,  and  feafonableCounfels  5  Let 
this  then  excite  you  with  greater  Diligence  and  Fervency  to 
look  up  to  the  Father  of  Mercies  for  Grace  andAffiftance  againft 
all  the  Vanities  of  theWorld.  And  if  you  would  glorify  God, 
anfwer  his  juft  ExpecSlations  from  you,  and  make  your  own 
Soul  happy  in  this  and  the  coming  World,  obferve  thefe  few 
Directions  ;  tho'  not  from  a  Father,  yet  from  a  Brother  wh* 
is  toucb'd  with  a  tender  Concern  for  your  prefent  and  fiiturq 
Happinefs.  And, 

Flr/l^  refolvc  upon,  and  daily  endeavour  to  prailife  a 
Life  of  Serioufnefs  and  Itrid  Sobriety,  The  wife  Man  will  tell 
yoa  the  great  Advantage  of  fucha  Life,  Ecclef.  vii.  3.  Think  of 
theLife  of  Chr  ist  ;  and  when  you  can  find  that  he  was  pleas'd 
with  jelling  and  vain  Merriment,  then  you  may  indulge  it  in 
your  felf. 

Jgain,  be  careful  to  make  a  good  Improvement  of  precious 
Time.  VViien  you  ceal'e  from  Labour,  fill  up  your  7"imc  in 
Reading,  Meditation,  &  Prayer:  And  while  your  Hands  are  la- 
bouring, let  your  Heart  be  employed,  as  much  as  poiTible,  in 
divine  Thoughts. 

Further^  take  Heed  that  you  faithfully  perform  the  Bufincfs 
you  have  to  do  in  the  VVorld,  from  a  Regard  to  the  Commt^ds 
of  God  ;  and  not  from  an- ambitious  defire  of  being  edeenisd 
better  ihaa  others.     Wcfliould  always  look  upon  our  felvcs  aS/ 

G0D'$ 


Ik 


<?/ Mr.  David  Brainerd.  265 

GOD's  Servants,  placed  in  GOD's  World,  to  Jo  his  Work  j 
and  accordingly  labour  faithfully  for  him  ;  not  with  a  Deiiga 
to  grow  rich  and  great, butjK)  glorifyGOD,and  do  all  theGood 
we  pofTibly  can. 

Jgain,  Never  expe<5l  any  Safisfa^ion  or  Happinefs  from  the 
T^orld.  If  you  hope  for  Happinefs  Z;?  the  VVorld,  hope  for  it 
from  God,  and  not  from  the  World.  Don*t  think  you  fhall 
be  more  happy^  if  you  live  to  fuch  or  fuch  a  State  of  Life,  if 
you  live  to  be  for  your  felf,  to  be  fettled  in  the  World,  or  if 
you  fliould  gain  anEftate  in  it :  but  look  upon  it  that  you  TnaU 
then  be  happy ^  when  you  can  be  conftanily  employ'd  forGOD, 
and  not  for  your  fclf  ;  and  defire  to  hvc  in  this  World,  only 
to  do  and  Juffer  what  GOO  allots  to  you.  VVhen  you  can  be 
of  the  Spirit  and  Temper  oi  Angels^  who  are  willing  to  come 
down  into  this  lower  World,  to  pcfform  what  God  commands 
them,  tho'  their  Defircs  are  heavenly^  and  not  in  the  leaft  fee  on 
earthly  Things,  then  you  will  be  of  that  Temper  that  you 
ought  to  have.  Col.  HI.  2. 

Once  more.  Never  think  that  you  can  live  to  GOD  bvy^«r 
cwn  Power  or  Strength  ;  but  always  look  to,  and  r^ly  on  him 
for  AfTiftance,  yea,  for  all  Strength  and  Grace.  There  is  no 
greater  Truth,  than  this,  That  we  can  do  nothing,  of  our  [elves  ; 
Joh.  XV.  5.  and  2  Cor.  iii.  5.  Yet  nothing  but  our  own  Expe- 
rience can  efFedually  teach  it  to  us.  Indeed  we  are  a  long 
I'lme  in  learning, that  tf/ZourStrength  and  Salvation  is  inGOD. 
This  is  a  Life,  that  I  think  v\o  unconverted  Man  can  poilib.V 
live  ;  and  yet  it  is  aLife  that  every  godly  Soul  is  preffing  after', 
in  fome  good  Meafure.  Let  it  then  be  your  great  Concern, thus 
to  devote  your  lelf  and  your  all  to  GOD. 

I  long  to  fee  you,  that  I  may  fay  much  more  to  you  than  I 
now  can,  for  your  Benefit  and  Welfare  ;  but  1  defire  to  com- 
mit you  to,  and  leave  you  with  the  Father  of  Mercies,  and 
God  of  all  Grace ',  praying  that  you  maybe  directed  fifcly 
ihro'  an  evil  IVorid,  to  GOD*s  heavenly  Kingdom, 
1  am  your  affectionate  loving  Brother, 

David  Brainerd. 

No.  4.  To  a  fpecial    Friend. 

The  Forks  of  Delaware,  July  31.  1744. 

— — r^Ertainly  the  greateft,  the  noble/i  Pleafure  of  intelligent 

^^  Creatures  muft  refult  from  their  Acquaintance  with  the 

WefTcd  GOD,  and  with  their  own  rational  and  immortalSouls* 

M  m  2  Ani 


266  TbehlFE 

And  Oh,  how  divinely  fweet  and  entertaining  is  it,  to  look  in- 
lo  our  own  Souls,  when  we  can  find  all  our  Powers  andPafliona 
united  and  eogaged   in  Purfuit  a|pr  GOD,   our  whole  Souls 
longing  and  paffionatcly  breathing  after  a  Conformity  to  him, 
and  the  fuilEnjoymentof  him  !   Verily  there  are  no  Hours  pafs 
away  with  fo  much  divine  Pleafure,   as  thofe  that  arc  fpent  in 
Communing  withGOD  and  our  ownHearts.     Oh,  how  fweet 
is  a  Spirit  of  Devotion,  a  Spirit  of  Serioufnefs  and  divineSolem- 
nity,  a  Spirit  of  Gofpel-Simpllcity,   Love,  Tendernefs  !   Oh, 
how  derirable,andhow  profitable  to  the  Chriftian  Life, is  aSpi- 
rit  of  hoiyVVatchfulnefsj&godlyJealoufy  over  ourfelves;  when 
our  Souls  are  afraid  of  nothing  fo  much  as  that  we  (hall  grieve 
and  offend  the  blefrcdGOD,whom  at  fuchTimeswe  apprehend, 
or  at  leaft  hope,  to  be  a  Father  and  Friend ;  whom  we  then 
love  and  long  to  p/eafe,  rather  than  to  be  happy  our  felves,  oi  at 
leafl  we  delight  to  derive  our  Happinefs  from  pleafing  and  glo- 
rifying him  !   Surely  this  is  a  pious  Temper,    worthy  of  the 
higl)e(t  Ambition  and    clofeft    Purfuit  of  intelligent   Creatures 
and  holy  Chriflians.     Oh,  how  vaftly  fuperiour  is  thePleafure, 
Peace,  and  Satisfaction  derived   from  thefe  divine  Frames,    to 
that  which  we  (  alas  )  fometimes  purfuein  Things  impertinent 
and  triflino;  j     Oar  own  bitter  Experience  teaches  us,  that  in 
the  midfi  of  fuch  Laughter  the  Heart  is  forr awful,  and  there  |s 
no  trueSatisfaCtion  but  inGOD.    But, alas  !  How  fhall  we  ob- 
tain and  retain  this  fweet  Spirit  of  Religion   and  Devotion  ? 
Let  us  follow  the  Apoftle's  Direction,  PhiL  ii.  12.    and  labour 
^upon  the  Encouragement  he  there  mentions  ver.  13.   Foj  *tis 
GOD  only  can  afF.rd  us  this  Favour;  and  he  will  he  fought 
io^  and  'tis  fit  we  fhould  wait  upon  him  for  fo  rich  a  Mercy, 
Oh,  may  the  (jOD  of  allGrace  afFjrd  us  the  Grace  and  influ- 
ences ot  hrs  divine  Spirit  ;   and  help  us  that  we  may  from  our 
Hearts  efleem  it  our  greateft  Liberty  andHappinefs,  that  whe- 
ihirwe  live,  we  rnay  live  to  the  LORD,  or  ivhether  we  die,  we 
mujf  die  to  the  LORD  ;   that  in  Life  andDeath  we  may  he  his. 

I  am  in  a  very  poor  State  of  Health  j  i  think,  fcarce  ever 
poorer  ;  Bur,  thro'  divme  GoodneT  ;  I  atii  not  difcontented 
unlci  my  Weaknefs,  and  Confinement  to  this  Wildernefs  :  I 
blefs  GOD  for  .iliis  Retirement :  1  never  was  more  thankful 
for  any  rhiog,  than  I  have  been  of  late  for  theNeceffity  1  am 
under  of  SelfTdeiiial  in  many  Refpe6ls  :  I  love  to  be  a  Pilgrim 
,  and  Stranger  in  this  VVjldernefs  :  It  feems  molt  fit  for  fuch-a 
pour  ign oiant,  v.^orihiefs,  defpifed  Creature  as  f.  I  would  not 
Chang*  my  prcfent  Mifft(.n  loi  any  other  Bufinefsin  the  whoie: 


ef  Mr.  David  BralnerdJ  267 

World.  I  may  tell  you  freely,  without  Vanity  and  Oftenta- 
tion,  GOD  has  of  late  given  me  great  Freedom  and  Fervency 
in  Prayer,  when  1  have  bee%fo  weak  and  feeble,  my  Nature 
feem*d  as  if  it  would  fpeedily  diflblve.  I  feel  as  if  my  all  was 
lo(t,  and  I  was  undone  for  this  World,  if  the  poor  Heathen 
mayn't  be  converted.  I  feel,  in  general,  different  from  what 
I  did,  when  1  faw  you  laft  ;  at  leaft  naore  crucified  to  all  theEn- 
joyments  of  Life.  It  would  be  very  refrefhing  to  me,  to  fee  you 
here  in  thisDefert ;  efpecially  in  my  weak  difconfolate  Hours: 
But,  I  think,  1  could  be  content  never  to  fee  you,  or  any  of 
my  Friends  again  in  this  World,  if  GOD  would  blefi  my  La- 
bours here  to  the  Converfion  of  the  poor  Indians, 

I  have  much  that  1  could  willingly  communicate  to  you, 
which  I  muft  omit,  'till  Providence  gives  us  Leave  ta  fee  each 
other.     In   the  mean  Time,  I  reft 

Your  obliged  Friend  and  Servant, 

David  Br ai nerd. 

No.  5.   To  a  fpecial  Friend,  a  Minifter  of  the  Gofpel  in 

NeW'Jerfey, 

The  Forks  of  D^AsK/flr^,  Decemb.  24.  1744. 

Rev.  and  dear  Brother, 
— T  Have  little  to  fay  to  you,  about  fpiritual  ^m,  and  thofe 
J-  bleffcd Refrejbment',  &  divine  Confolations,  v/ith  which  I 
have  been  much  faveuf'd  inTimespaft  :  But  this  lean  tellyou, 
that  if  I  gainExperience  in  no  other  Point, yet  I  am  fure  I  do  in 
this,  viz.  That  iht  prefeni  World  has  nothing  in  it  to  Jatisfy  an 
immortal  Soul  ;  and  hence, that  it  is  not  to  be  defired  for  it  felf^ 
but  only  becaufe  GOD  may  ht  feen  &  fervedm  it  :  And  I  wifti 
I  could  be  more  patient  &  willing  to  live  in  it  for /^/V^W, than 
I  can  ufually  find  my  felf  to  be.  'Tis  no  Vertue,  I  know,  to 
defire  Death,  only  to  be  freed  from  the  Miferies  of  Life  :  But 
I  want  that  divine  HOPE,  which  you  obferved,  when  I  faw  you 
Jaft,  was  the  very  Sinnews  of  vital  Religion.  Earth  can  do  us 
no  Good,  and  if  there  be  no  HOPE  of  our  doing  Good  onEarth, 
how  can  we  defire  to  live  in  it  ?  And  yet  we  ought  to  defire,or 
at  leaft  to  be  refign'd,  to  tarry  in  it ;  becaufe  'fis  the  Will  of 
our  alwife  Sovereign.  But  perhaps  thefe  Thoughts  will  appear 
melancholy  and  gloomy,  and  confequently  will  be  very  unde- 
firable  to  you  ;  and  rherefore  1  forbear  to  add.  I  wifh,  you 
mayn't  read  them  in  the  fame  Circumftances  in  which  {  write 
ihem.  I  have  a  little  more  to  do  and  fuffer  in  a  dark  dirconfoiate 


%VorId 


268  «^  L  I  F  E 

World  ;  and  then  I  hope  to  be  as  happy  as  you  are.  .r  I 
(hould  afk  you  to  pray  for  me,  were  I  worth  your  Concern. 
Mzy  the  Lord  enable  us  both  to iitjlfltre  Hardnefs  as  good  Soldiert 
i>/ Jesus  Christ  ;  and  may  we  obtain  Mercy  of  God  to  h 
faithjuly  to  the  Death,  in  the  Difchargc  of  our  refpe<StiveTruft$, 
I  am  your  very  unworthy  Brother, 

and  humble  Servant, 

Dav*  Brainerd. 

No.  6.  To  his  Brother  John,  at  College. 

Crofweekfung^  in  New-Jerfey,  Decern.  28.  1745. 

Very  dear  Brother, 
—  T  Am  in  one  continued,  perpetual,  and  uninterrupted 
-*-  Hurry ;  and  divine  Providence  throws  fo  much  upon 
me,that  I  don't  fee  it  will  ever  be  otherwife.  May  I  ohtainMercy 
of  GOD  to  be  faithful  ^to  the  Death.  1  can't  fay, I  am  weary  of 
my  Hurry  ;  I  only  want  Strength  and  Grace  to  do  more  for 
GOD,  than  I  have  ever  yet  done. 

My  dear  Brother,  ^The  LORD  «/  Heaven,  that  has  carried 
me  thro'  many  Trials,  hlefi  you  ;  blefs  you  for  Time,  andEter- 
nity;  and  fit  you  to  do  Service  for  him  in  his  Church  below, 
and  to  enjoy  his  blifsfulPrefence  in  hisChurch  triumphant.  My 
Brother,  the  Time  is  Jhort  :  Oh,  let  us  fill  it  up  for  GOD:  Let 
us  count  the  Sufferiv,gi  of  this  prefent  Time  as  nothing,  if  we  can 
but  run  our  Race,  and  finifi  our  Courfe  with  Joy.  Oh,  let  us 
firive  to  live  to  GOD.  I  blefs  the  Lord,  I  have  nothing  to  do 
with  Earth,  but  only  to  labour  honeftly  in  it  for  GOD,  'till  I 
fhall  accompli fl)  as  an  Hireling  my  Day.  I  think,  I  don't  defire 
to  live  one  Minute  for  any  Thin?  that  Earth  can  afFord.  Oh, 
that  I  could  live  for  none  but  GOD,  'till  my  dying  Moment. 
1  am  your  afFecSionate  Brother, 
^     .  D.  Brainerd, 

No.  7.  To  his  Brother  Jfraely  then  a  Student  at  Yale-Collegf 
in  New  Haven. 

EliJaheth-Town^lSleW'JerJey^QV.  24.  1746. 
Dear  Brother, 
Had  determined  to  make  you  and  my  other  Friends  in  ISJew 
£ rg land  a  V lilt,  this  Fall ;  partly  from  an  earneft  Defire  I 
had  to  fee  you  and  them,  and  partly  with  a  View  to  the  Reco- 
very of  my  Health ;  which  has,  for  more  than  three  Months 
psf^  been  much  impair 'd.  And  in  Order  to  profecute  this  D^ 

figny 


I 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.'  ^^^ 

fign,  I  fct  out  from  my  own  People  about  three  Weeks  ago, 
and  came  as  far  as  to  this  Place ;  where,  my  Diforder  greatly 
increafing,  I  have  been  obliged  to  keep  Houfe  ever  fince,untii 
the  Day  before  Yefterday  ;  at  which  Time,  I  was  able  to  ride 
about  half  a  Mile,  but  found  my  felf  much  tired  with  the  Jour- 
ney. I  have  now  no  Hopes  of  profecuting  my  Journey  into 
A^.  England  this  Winter,  fuppofing  my  prefent  State  of  Health 
wiir by  no  Means  admit  of  it :  Aliho' I  am  thro'  divine  Good- 
nefs  much  better  than  I  was  fomeDays  ago,  yetl  han'tStrength 
now  to  ride  more  than  ten  Miles  a  Day,  if  the  Seafon  were 
warm,&  fit  for  me  to  travel  in.  My  Diforder  has  been  attended 
with  feveral  Symptoms  of  a  Confumption  ;  and  I  have  been  at 
Times  apprehenfive,  that  my  great  Change  was  at  Hand  :  Yet 
blefTed  be  GOD,  I  have  never  been  affrighted-,  but  on  the 
contrary,  at  feme  Times  much  delighted  with  a  View  of  it's 
Approach.  Oh,  the  BlefTednefs  of  being  delivered  from  the 
Clogs  of  Flefh  and  Senfe,  from  a  Body  of  Sin  and  fpiritual 
Death  !  Oh,  the  unfpeakable  Sweetnefs  of  being  tranflated  in- 
to a  State  of  compleat  Purity  and  Perfection  !  Believe  me,  mY 
Brother,  a  lively  View  and  Hope  of  thefeThings  will  make  the 

King  of  Terron  himfelf  appear  agreable. Dear  Brother, 

\zt  me  intreat  you,  to  keep  Eternity  in  your  View,  and  behave 
your  felf  as  becomes  one  that  muft  fhortly  give  an  Account  of  alt 
Things  done  in  the  Body,  That  GOD  may  be  your  GOD,  and 
prepare  you  for  his  Service  here,  and  his  Kingdom  of  Glery 
hereafter,     is  the  Defire   and  daily  Prayer  of 

Your  afFedionate  loving  Brother, 

D.  Brainerd, 

No.  8.  To  his  Brother  Jfrael,  at  College  ;  written  in  the 
Time  of  his  extreme  llincfs  in  Bofton^  a  few  Month  before  his 
Death. 

Bo/icn^  June  30.  1747. 
My  dear  Brother, 
TT  is  from  the  fides  of  Eternity  I  now  addrcfs  you.  I  am  hear- 
■■■  tily  forry,  that  I  have  fo  little  Strength  to  write  what  i  long 
^o  much  to  communicate  to  vou.  But  let  me  tell  you,  my  Bro- 
ther, Eternity  is  another  Thing  than  we  ordinarily  take  it  to  be 
in  a  heaithtul  State.  Oh,  how  vaft  and  boundlefs  I  Oh,  how 
fix'd  and  unalterable  !  Oh,  of  what  infinite  Importance  is  it, 
that  we  be  prepared  for  Eternity  !  I  have  been  jull  a  dying, 
novi/  for  more  than  a  Week  ;  and  all  around  me  have,  thou '>:hc 
m*  Tq  :  Buc  in  this  Time  {  have  had  clear  Views  of  Eternity  ; 

have 


270  g-^^fLIFE 

have  feen  the  BlefTednefs  of  the  Gadly,  in  fome  Meafure  ;  and 
havelorg'd  to  (hare  their  happy  State  ;  as  well  as  been  com- 
fortably fatisfied,  that  through  Grace,  I  fnall  dofo  :  But  Oh, 
what  Anguifh  is  raifed  in  my  Mind,  to  think  of  an  Eternity  for 
thofe  who  are  Chrlftlefs^  for  thofe  who  are  miftakcn,  and  who 
bring  their  fa) fe  Hopes  to  the  Grave  with  them  !  The  Sight 
was  fo  dreadful,  I  could  by  no  Means  bear  it  :  My  Thoughts 
recoiled, and  1  faid  (  but  under  a  more  affeciing  Senfe  than  ever 
before  )  f^ho  can  dwell  with  everh/iing  Burnings  !  Oh,  me- 
thought,  that  1  could  now  fee  my  FrieRds,  that  i  might  warn 
them,  to  fee  to  it,  they  lay  their  Foundation  for  Eternity  fure. 
And  you,  my  dear  Brother,  I  have  been  particularly  concerned 
for  ;  and  have  wondered,  I  fo  muchregledted  converfing  with 
you  about  your  fpiritual  State  at  our  laftMeeting.  Oh, my  Bro- 
ther, let  me  then  befeech  you  now  to  examine, whether  you  are 
m^tt6  2i  new  Creature?  Whether  you  haveever  a6ledabove5^//? 
"Whether  the  Glory  of  God  has  ever  been  the  fweeteft  higheft 
Concern  with  you  ?  Whether  you  have  ever  been  reconciled 
to  all  the  Perfections  of  God  ;  in  a  Word,  whether  God  hai 
been  your  Portion^  alid  a  holy  Conformity  to  him  your  chief 
Delight  ?  If  you  can't  anfwer  pofitively,confider  ferioufly  the 
frequent  Breathings  ofyourSoul  :  But  don't  however  put  your 
felf  off  with  a  flight  Anfwer.  If  you  have  Reafon  to  think  you 
are  Gracelefs^  Oh  give  your  felf  and  the  Throne  of  Grace  no 
Reft,  'tillGoD  arife  and  fave.  But  if  the  Cafe  fhould  be  other- 
Wife,  blefs  God  for  his  Grace,  and  prefs  after  Holinefs.  * 

My  Soul  longs,  that  you  floould  befitted  for,  and  in  dueTime 
go  into  theWork  of  the  Miniflry,  I  can't  bear  to  thinkofyour 
going  into  any  other  Bufinefs  in  Life.  Don't  be  difcouraged, 
becaufe  you  fee  your  elderBrothers  in  theMiniftry  die  early^otiQ 
after  another  :  I  declare,  now  1  am  dying,  I  would  not  have 
fpent  my  Life  othrwife  for  the  whole ''Vorld.  But  I  muft  leave 
ihis  with  God. 

If  this  Line  fhould  come  to  your  Hands  foon  after  the  Date, 
I  fiiould  be  almoft  defirous  you  (hould  fet  out  on  a  Journey  to 
me  :  It  may  be,  you  may  fee  me  alive  ;  which  1  (hould  much 
rejoyce  in.  But  if  you  can't  come,  I  muft  commit  you  to  the 
Grace  of  G©d,  where  you  are.  May  he  be  your  Guide  and 
Counfeller,  your  Sandiiiier  and  eternal  Portion. 


Mr.  5rr7/Wfl' afterwards  had  greater  Satisfaction  concern- 
ing the  State  of  his  Brother's  Soul,  by  much  Opportunity 
of  Converfation  with  him  before  his  Death,  Oh, 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd;  271 

Ob,  my  dear  Brother,  flee  flefhly  Lufls^  and  the  inchanting 
AmufmentSy  as  well  as  corrupt  Do£lrines  of  the  prefent  Day  j 
and  ftrive  to  live  to  GOD. 

Take  this  as  the  la/i  Line  from 

Your  afFedtionate  dying  Brother, 

D,  Brainerd, 

No.  9*  To  a  young  Gentleman,  z  Candidate  for  the  Work 
of  the  Mini/iryy  for  whom  he  had  a  fpecial  Friendfiiip  5  alfo 
written  at  the  fame  Time  of  his  great  lllnefs  and  nearaefs  to 
Death  in  Bofton, 

Very  dear  Sir, 

HOw  amazing  'tis,  that  the  Livings  who  how  'tkey 
mufl  die,  fhould  notwithftanding  put  far  away  the  evil 
Day,  in  a  Seafon  of  Health  and  Profperity  ;  and  live  at  fuch  an 
awful  Diftancc  from  a  Familiarity  with  the  Grave,  and  the 
great  Concerns  beyond  it  !  And  efpecially  itmay  juftly  fill  us 
with  Surprize,  that  any  whofeMinds  have  been  divinely  enlight", 
nedy  to  behold  the  important  Things  of  Eternity  as  they  are, 
I  fay,  that  fuch  fhould  live  in  this  Manner.  And  yet  Sir,how 
frequently  is  this  the  Cafe  ?  How  rare  are  tjie  Inftances  of 
thofe  who  live  and  a£t,  from  Day  ^to  Day,  as  on  the  Verge  of 
Eternity  ;  ftriving  to  fill  up  all  their  remaining  Moments, 
in  the  Service,  and  to  the  Honour  of  thefr  great  Mafler  ?  We 
infenfibly  trifle  away  Time,  whilp  we  feem  to  have  enough  of 
it;  and  are  fo  ftrangely  amufed,  as  in  a  great  Meafure  to  lofe  a 
Scnfeof  the  Holinefs  and  bleffed  Qualifications  necefTary  to 
prepare  us  to  be  Inhabitants  of  the  heavenly  Paradife.  But 
Oh,  dear  Sir,  a  dying  Bed^  if  we  enjoy  our  Rcafon  clearly,  will 
give  another  View  of  Things.  I  have  now,  for  mor«  than 
three  Weeks,  lain  under  the  greateftDegree  of  Weaknefs  ;  the 
greater  Part  of  the  Time,  expecting  daily  and  hourly  to  enter 
into  the  eternal  World  :  fometimes  have  been  fo  far  gone,  as 
to  be  wholly  ^peechlefs,  for  fome  Hours  together.  And  Oh, 
of  what  vaft  Importance  has  a  holy  fpiritual  Life  appeared  to  me 
to  be  in  this  Seafon  1  I  have  longed  to  call  upon  all  mvFriends, 
to  make  it  their  Bufinefs  to  live  to  GOD  5  and  cfpecs^llv  all 
that  are  dcfigned  for,  or  engaged  in  the  Service  of  theSan^uary. 
O  dear  Sir,  don't  think  it  enough, to  live  at  theRaie  of  common 
Chri/Iians,  Alas,  to  how  little  Purpofe  do  they  often  convtrfe^ 
when  they  meet  together  I  The  Vifits^  even  of  thofe  who  are 
called  Chriftianj  indeed,  are  frequently  extreme  barren :    And 

N  a  Con{cien«e 


272  5^^  L  I  F  E 

Ccnfcience  can't  but  condemn  us  for  the  Mifimprovement 
of  Time,  while  we  have  been  converfant  with  them.  But  tfi€ 
Way  to  enjoy  the  divine  Prefencejand  be  fitted  tor  diftinguifti'^ 
ingService  forGOD,is  to  live  aLifc  oi  greatDtvotion  $c  eenjiant 
Self- Dedication  to  him  ;  obferving  the  iVIotions  and  Difpofiti- 
ons  of  our  own  Hearts,  whence  we  may  learn  the  Corruptions 
that  lodge  there,  and  our  conflant  Need  of  Help  from  GOD 
for  the  Performance  of  the  leaft  Duty.  And  Ob,  dear  Sir,  let 
me  befeech  you  frequently  to  attend  the  great  and  preciousDu- 
ties  of  fecret  Fa/iing  Sin&  Prayer, 

I  have  a  fecret  Thought, from  feme  Things  1  have  obfervcdi 
that  GOD  may  perhaps  defign  you  for  fome  fingular  Service  in 
the  World.  Oh  then  labour  to  be  prepared  and  qualified  to 
do  much  for  GOD.  Read  Mr.  Edwards's  Piece  on  the  Jf- 
feSliom^  again  and  again  ;  and  labour  to  dijlinguijh  clearly  upon 
£xperiences&AfFe(StionsinReligion, that  you  may  make  aDiiFe- 
rence  between  th^GoIdSc  thefhiningDr^/f  ;  I  fay, labour  here, as 
ever  you  would  be  an  u/efui  Minijier  of  Chrift  :  For  nothing 
has  putfucha  Stop  to  the  Work  of  GOD  in  the  late  Day  as 
the  faUe  Religion,  the  wild  AfFedtions, that  attended  it.  Suffer 
me  therefore,  finally,  to  intreat  you  earneflly  to  give  your  f elf 
to  Prayer,  to  Reading  and  Meditation  on  divineTruths  :  Strive 
to  penetrate  to  the  Bottom  of  them,  and  never  be  content  with 
a  fuperficial  Knowledge.  By  this  Means,  yourThoughts  will 
gradually  grow  weighty  and  judicious  ;  and  you  hereby  will  be 
pofTcfTed  of  a  valuable  Treafure,  out  of  which  you  may  produce 
Things  new  and  old,  to  the  Glory  of  GOD. 

And  now  1  commend  you  to  the  Grace  of  GOB  ;  earneftly 
dtfiring,  that  a  plentiful  Portion  of  the  divine  Spirit  may  reft 
upon  you  5  that  you  may  live  to  GOD  in  every  Capacity  of 
IJfe,  and  do  abundant  Service  for  him  in  z.puhlick^  if  it  be  his 
Will  ;  and  that  you  may  be  richly  qualified  for  the  Inheritance 
of  the  Saints  in  Light. 

I  fcarce  expect  to  fee  your  Face  any  more  in  the  Body; 
and  therefore  mireat  you  to  accept  thii>  as  the  Uik  Token  of 
Love,  from 

Your  fincerely  affedlicnate  dying  Friend, 

David  Brainerdi  - 

P.  S,  I  aril  now,  at  the  dating  of  this  Letter,  corfiJcrably 
recovered  from  what  I  was  v;hen  I  wrote  it  ;  it  haviiil^iain  by 
xiK  (ofttQ  TuiiCj  for  \v«r.:  of  an  Opportunity  of  Coiiveyunce  ; 

k 


of  Mr.  David  Brainerd.  273 

it  was  written  in  Bofton» I  am  now  able  td  ride  a  little, 

and  fo  am  removed  into  the  Country  :  But  I  have  no  more 
Expectation  of  recovering,  than  when  I  vi^rote,  tho'  I  am  a 
little  better  for  the  prcfent  5  and  therefore  I  (till  fubfcribe  my 
felf.  Your  dpng  Friend,  iffr. 

D.  B. 

No.  10.  To  his  Brother  John,  at  Bethel,  the  Town  of 
Chriftian  Indians  in  New-Jerfey  ;  written  likewife  at  Bojion^ 
when  he  was  there  on  the  Brink  of  the  Grave,  in  the  Summer, 
before  his  Death. 

Dear  Brother, 

I  Am  now  jufl  on  the  Verge  of  Eternity ^  expe£ling  very 
fpeedily  to  appear  in  the  unfeen  World.  I  feel  my  felf 
ho  more  an  Inhabitant  of  Earth,2nd  fometimes  earneftly  long 
to  depart  and  be  with  Chriji.  I  blefs.God,he  has  for  fome  Years 
given  me  an  abiding  Conviftion,  that  it  is  impoflible  for  any 
rationalCreature  to  enjoy  txne Happinefs  without  being  entirely 
devoted  toHim.  Under  the  Influence  of  this  Convidion  I  have 
in  fome  Meafure  a6led  :  Oh  that  I  had  done  more  fo  !  I  faw 
both  the  Excellency  &Nccefrity  oiHoline/s  in  Life  ;  but  never 
in  fuch  a  Manner  as  now, when  I  am  juft  brought  to  the  Sides 
of  the  Grave.  Oh,  my  Brother,  purfue  after  Holinejs ;  prefs 
towards  this  blefTed  Mark  ;  and  let  your  thirfty  Soul  continu- 
ally fay,  1  Jhall  never  be  Satisfied  'till  1  awake  in  thy  Likenefs, 
AUhb'  there  has  been  a  great  deal  of  Selfijhnefs  in  my  Views  ; 
of  which  I  am  afhamed,  and  for  which  my  Soul  is  humbled  at 
every  View  :  Yet,  blefled  be  God,  I  find  I  have  really  had, 
for  the  mofl  part,  fuch  a  Concern  for  his  Glory,  and  the  Ad- 
vancement of  his  Kingdom  in  the  World,  that  it  is  a  Satisfadtion 
to  me  to  refleft  upon  thefe  Tears, 

And  now,  my  dear  Brother,  as  I  muft  prefs  you  to  purfue 
after  perfonal  Holinefs,  to  be  as  much  in  Fafiing  and  Prayer  as 
your  Health  will  allow,  and  to  live  above  the  Rate  of  common 
Chri/iians  ;  fo  I  muft  intreat  you  folemniy  to  attend  to  your 
publici  Work:  Labour  to  diftinguifh  between  true  znd/alfe 
Religion  :  And  to  that  End,  watch  the  Motions  of  God's 
Spirit  upon  your  own  Heart  ;  look  to  him  for  Help  ;  and  im- 
partially compare  your  Experientes  with  his  ff^ord.  Read  Mr* 
Edwards  on  the  Jfe^ions^  where  the  EfTence  and  Soul  of  Re- 

N  n  2  ligion 


274 


ne  LIFE 


llgion  is  clearly  diftinguifli'd  from  falfe  Affeftions.  *  Value 
religious  jfoys  according  to  the  SuhjeSf-Matur  of  them :  There 
are  many  thatrejoycc  in  their  (uppokd yu^ificathn;  but  what  do 
thcfcjoys  argue,but  only  that  they  iove  themf elves  ?  Whereas, in 
irui  fpiritual  Joys,  the  Soul  rejoyces  in  God  for  what  he  is  in 
himftlf  'y  blefles  God  for  his  Holinefs,  Sovereignty,  Power, 
Faithfuinefs,  and  all  his  Perfedlions  ;  adores  God,  that  he  is 
what  he  is,  that  he  is  unchangeably  poflefs'd  of  infinite  Glory 
and  Happinefs.  Now,  when  Men  thus  rejoyce  in  the  PerftC' 
tionsofGod,  and  in  the  infinite  Excellency  of  the  Way  of  Sal' 
vation  h  Chri/f,  and  in  the  holy  Commands  of  God,  which  arc 
a  Tranfcript  of  his  holy  Nature,  ih^/e  Joys  are  divine  and  fpi- 
ritual. Our  Joys  will  ftand  by  us  at  the  Hour  of  Deaths  if  we 
can  be  then  fatisfied,   that  we  have  thus  adled  above /f^,  and 

*  I  had  at  firft  fully  intended,  in  publifliing  this  and  the 
forcgoingLetterSjto  have  fupprefs'd  thefePaflages  wherein 
■my  Name  is  mention'd,  and  my  Difcourfe  on  religious  Af" 
feSftons  recommended  :  And  am  fenfible,ihat  by  my  doing 
otherwife,  I  fliili  bring  upon  me  the  Reproach  of  fome. 
But  how  much  foeverlmay  be  pleafed  with  theCommen- 
dation  of  an)*  Performance  of  mine  ( and  I  confefs,  £ 
efteem  the  Judgment  and  Approbation  of  fuch  a  Perfon  as 
Mr  Brainerd,  worthy  to  be  valued,  and  look  on  my  felf 
as  highly  honoured  by  it  )  Yet  I  can  truly  fay,  theThings 
that  governed  me  in  altering  my  foremention'd  Determi- 
nation, with  Refpe6l  to  thefe  PalTages,  were  thcfe  two. 
(i .)  What  Mr.  Brainerd  here  fays  of  that  Difcouife,  fhews 
very  fully  and  particularly  what  his  Notions  were  of  ex- 
perimental Religion,  and  the  Nature  of  true  Piety,  and 
how  far  he  was  from  placing  it  in  Impreffions  on  the  Ima^ 
gination,  or  any  enthufiaftical  Impulfes,  and  how  efTential 
in  Religion  he  efteem*d  holy  Pradice,  ^£.  ^c.  For  all 
that  h^ve  read  tfeat  Difcourfe,  know  what  Sentiments  are 
there  exprefs'd  concerning  thefe  Things.  (  2.  }  I  judged, 
that  the  y^pprobation  of  fo  apparent  andeminent  a  Friend 
and  Example  of  inward  vital  Religion,  and  evan  >elical 
Piety  in  the  Height  of  it,  would  probably  tend  to  make 
ih^tBock  more  Serviceable  ;  efpecially  among  fome  Kinds 
of  zealoi^s  Pcrfons,  whofe  Benefit  was  efpecially  aim*d 
at  in  the  Book;  fome  of  which  are  prejudiced  againft 
it,  as  written  in  too  legal  a  Strain,  and  oppoiing  fome 
Things  wherein  the  Height  of  Chriftian  Experience  con- 
fifts,  and  tending  to  build  Men  up  on  their  own Wofks. 

ill' 


e?/Afr.  David  Brainerd.  275 

in  a  difintcrcfted  Manner  (  if  I  may  fo  exprefs  it )  rejoyced  in 

the  Glory  of  the  blcfTed  God. -I  fear,  you  are  not  fuf- 

ficiently  aware  how  much  falfe  Rehgion  there  is  in  the  World  : 
Many  ferious  Chriftians  and  valuable  Minifters  are  too  eafily 
impofedupon  by  thisfalfefi/^z^.  Ilikewife  fear, you  are  not  fen- 
fibleof  iht  dreadful  EffeSis  &  Confequencei  or  this  falfeReligion. 
Let  me  tell  you, 'tis  iht  Devi  I  transformed  into  an  Angel  of  Light  ; 
'cis  a  Brat  of  Hell,  that  always  fprings  up  wiih  every  Revival  of 
Religion,  andftabs  and  murders  the  Caufe  of  God,  while  ij 
paffes  Current  with  Multitudes  of  well-meaning  People  for 
the  Height  of  Religion.  Set  yourfelf,  my  Brother,  to  crufh  ail 
Appearances  of  this  Nature,  among  the  Indians^  and  never  en- 
courage any  Degrees  of  Heat  without  Lighf.  Charge  my  Peo- 
ple in  the  Name  of  their  dying  Mini/fer^  yea,  in  the  Name  of 
Him  whowas  dead  and  is  alive^io  live  and  walk  as  becomes  the 
Gofpel.  Tell  them,  hov;  great  the  Expedlations  of  God  and 
his  People  are  from  them,  and  how  awfully  they  will  wound 
God's  Caufe, if  they  fall  into  Vice  ;  as  well  as  fatally  prejudice 
other  poor  Indians.  Always  infift,  that  their  Experiences  are 
rotten,  that  their  Joys  are  deluftve^  altho'  they  may  have  beea 
rapt  up  into  the  third  Heavens  in  their  own  Conceit  by  them, 
unlefs  the  main  Tenour  of  their  Lives  be  fpiritual,  watchful, 
and  holy.  In  preffing  thefeThings,  Thou  Jhalt  both  fave  thy  f elf , 
and  thofe  that  hear  thee  ?  >-■ 

GOD  knows,!  was  heartily  willing  to  have  ferved  him  longer 
in  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry,  altho'  it  had  ftill  been  attended 
with  all  the  Labours  and  Hardjhips  of  paft  Years,  if  he  had  (ttn 
fit  that  it  (hould  be  fo  :  but  as  his  Will  now  appears  otherwife, 
I  am  fully  content,and  can  with  utmoflFreedom  fay,  The  IVill 
oftheLord  be  done.  It  afFeds  me,  to  think  of  leaving  you  in  a 
World  of  Sin:  My  Heart  pities  you,  that  thofe  Storms  and 
Tempefts  are  yet  before  you,  which,  I  truft,  through  Grace  I 
am  almoft  delivered  from.  But  God  lives,  andhhjfed  be  myRock  : 
He  is  the  fame  almighty  Friend  ;  and  will, I  truft,  be  youiGuide 
and  Helper,  as  he  has  been  mine. 

And  now,  my  dear  Brother,  1  commend  you  to  God  and  ta 
the  Word  of  His  Grace^which  is  able  to  build  you  up,  and  give  you 
Inheritance  among  all  them  that  are  fanSfifjed.  May  you  enjoy  the 
divincPrefence,both  in  private  and  publick  ;  and  may  the  Arms 
of  your  Hands  be  madejlrong,  by  the  right  Hand  of  the  mighty  God 
f/Jacob,  Which  are  the  paffionate  Defires  and  Prayers  of 
Your  affectionate,  dying  Brother, 

David  Brainerd. 
APPENDIX. 


276  Refleftions  and  Obfcrvations 


A  N 

APPENDIX. 

Containing  fome  REFLECTIONS  and 
OBSERFA7I0NS  on  the  preceeding 
Memoirs  of  Mr.  Brainerd. 

L   W  7  E  have  here  Opportunity,   as  I  apprehend,  in  a  very 

W     lively  Injiance^  to  fee  the  Nature  of  true  Religion  ; 

and  the  Manner  of  it's  Operation^  when  exemph'fied 

in  a  high  Degree   and  powerful  Exercife,     Particularly  it  may 

be  worthy  to  be  obferved  : 

I.  How  greatly  Mr.  Brainerd' s  Religion  differed  from  that 
of  fome  Pretenders  to  the  Experience  of  a  clear  Work  of  favirg 
Converfton  wro*t  on  their  Hearts  ;  who  depending   and  living 
on  thatjfettle  in  a  coldycarelefs  h  carnal  Frame  of  Mindjand  in  a 
Negledt  of  thorough,  earneft  Religion,   in  the  ftated  Pradlice 
of  it.     Altho*  his  Convictions  an^  Converfion  were  in  allRef- 
pe6ls  exceeding  clear,  and  very  remarkable  ;    yet  how  far  was 
he  from  a6ling  as  tho*  he  thought  he  had  got  through  his  Work^ 
when  once  he  had  obtained    Comfort,     and  Satisfaction  of  his 
Intereft  in  Chrifl,    and    Title  to   Heaven.    On  the   contrary, 
thatWork  on  his  Heart,  by  which  he  was  brought  to  this,  was 
with  him  evidently  but  the    Beginning  of  hii  Work^   his   firft 
entring  on  the  great   Bufinefs  of  Religion  and  the  Service  of 
GOD,  his  firft  fetting  out  in  his  Race.     His  obtaining  Reft  of 
Soul  inChrift,  after  earneft  ftriving  to  enter  in  at  the  ftraitGate, 
and  being  violent  to  take  the  Kingdom  of  Heaven,  he  did  not 
look  upon  as  putting  an  End  to  any  further  Qccafion  for  ftriv- 
ing and  Violence  in  Religion  ;   but  thefe  were  continued  ftill, 
and  maintained  conflantly,  through  all  Changes,    to  the  very 
End  of  Life.     His  Work  was  not  finifhed,nor  hisRacc  ended, 
'tiilLifcwas  ended ;agreeable  to  ircqucniScripture-  Reprefentations 
of  the  Chriftian  Life.     He  continued    prcffing  forward    in   a 
conftant  Manner,  forgetting  the  Things  that  were  bchind,and 
reaching  forth  towards  the  Things  that  were  before.  HisPains 
and  Earneftncfs  in  the  Buftnefs  of  Religion  were  rather  increaf- 

cdy 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.  277 

ed,  than  diminiftied,  after  he  had  received  Comfort  andSatis- 
fa&Xon  concerning  the  fafety  of  his  State.  Thofe  divinePrin- 
ciples,  which  after  this  he  was  actuated  by,  of  Love  to  GODj 
and  Longings  and  Thirftings  after  Holinefs,  fcem  to  be  more 
cfFedual  to  engage  him  to  Pains  and  Adlivity  in  Religion, than 
Fear  of  Hell  had  been  before. 

And  as  his  Converfion  was  not  the  End  of  his  IP'orky  or  of 
the  Courfe  of  his  Diligence  and  Strivings  in  Religion  ;  fo  nei- 
ther was  it  the  End  of  the  Work  of  the  Spirit  of  GOD  on  his 
Heart :  But  on  the  contrary,  the  Beginning  of  that  Work  ; 
the  Beginning  of  his  fpiritual  Difcoveries,and  holy  Views  j  the 
firftDawning  of  theLight, which  thenceforward  increafed  more 
and  more  ;  the  Beginning  of  his  holy  AfFe6tions,  hisSorrow  foi 
Sin,  his  Love  to  GOD,  his  Rejoycing  in  Chrift  Jefus,  his 
Longings  after  Holinefs.  And  the  powerful  Operations  of  the 
Spirit  o\  God  in  thefe  Things,  were  carried  on,  from  the  Day 
of  his  Converfion,  in  a  continued  Courfe,  to  his  dying  Day. 
His  religious  Experiences,  his  Admiration,  his  Joy  and  Praife, 
and  flowing  AfFedlions,  did  not  only  hold  up  to  a  confir'erable 
Height  for  a  few  Days,  Weeks  or  Months,  at  firft,  whileHope 
and  Comfort  were  new  Things  with  him  -,  and  then  gradually 
dwindle  and  die  away,  'till  they  came  to  almoft  nothing,  and 
fo  leave  him  without  any  fenfible  or  remarkable  Experience  of 
fpiritual  Difcoveries,  or  holy  and  divine  AfFedions,  forMonths 
together  ;  as  it  is  v/ith  many, who  after  theNewnefs  of  Things 
is  over,  fooncome  to  that  pafs,  that  it  is  again  with  'em  very 
much  as  it  is  ufed  to  be  before  their  fuppofedConverfion,  with 
Refpea  to  any  prefcntViewsof  GOD'sGlory,of  Chrift'sExcel- 
lency,  or  of  the  Beauty  of  divine  Things  ;  and  with  Refpeit  to 
any  prefent  Thirftings  for  GOD,  or  ardeniOut-goings  of  trieir 
Souls  after  divine  ObjccSls  ;  But  only  now  and  then  they  have 
a  comfortabieRefledion  onThings  they  have  met  with  inTimes 
pafl,  and  are  fomeihing  ef^cded  with  them  j  and  {o  reft  eafy, 
thinking  allThings  are  well  ;  they  have  had  a  good  cUarlVorky 
and  their  State  is  fate,  and  they  doubt  not  but  they  fhall  go  to 
Heaven  when  they  die.  How  far  otherwife  was  it  with  Mr. 
Srainerd,  than  it  is  with  fuch  Ferfons  !  His  Experiences,  in- 
ffead  of  dying  away,  were  evidently  of  an  incieafing  Nature. 
His  firft  Love  and  other  holy  AfFc6ticns,even  at  the  i'.cgiviiUng 
were  very  great  ;  but  after  Months  and  Years,  became  much 
greater,  and  more  remarkable  ;  and  the  Spiritual  Exercifes  of 
h  s  Mind  continued  exceeding  great  (iho*  not  equally  fo  at  all 
Timesiyetufually  fo)  without  indulged  Remifnefs  and  without 

habitual 


2jZ  Refledlions  and  Obfervations 

habitual  dwindling  &  dying  away, even  'till  bisDeceafe.  They 
began  in  a  Time  of  generalDeadnefs  all  over  tbcLand,and  were 
greatly  increafed  in  a  Time  of  general  Reviving  of  Religion. 
And  when  Religion  decayed  again,  and  a  general  Deadnefs 
returned,  his  Experiences  were  ftill  kept  up  in  their  Height, 
and  his  holy  Exercifes  maintained  in  their  Life  and  Vigour  ; 
and  fo  continued  to  be,  in  a  general  Courfe, wherever  he  was, 
and  whatever  his  Circumf^ances  were,  among  En^ii/h  and  In- 
dians^ in  Company  and  alone,  in  Towns  and  Cities  and  in  the 
howlingWildernefs,in  Sicknefs  and  inHealth,  living  and  dying. 
This  is  agreable  toScripture  Defcriptions  of  true  and  rightRe- 
Jiglon,  and  of  theChriftianLife.  TheChange,  that  was  wrought 
in  him  at  his  Converfion,  was  agreable  fo  Scripture-Reprefen- 
tations  of  that  Change  which  is  wrought  in  true  Converfion  5 
a  great  Change,  and  an  abiding  Change,  rendring  biro  a  new 
Man,  a  new  Creature:  Not  only  a  Change  as  to  Hope  and 
Comfort,  and  an  Apprehenfion  of  his  own  good  Eflate  5  and  a 
tranfientChange,confiftinginhighFlights,of  pafTingAfFe^tions  ; 
but  a  Change  of  Nature^  a  Change  of  the  abiding  Habit  and 
Temper  of  his  Mind.  Nor  a  partial  Change,  meerly  in  Point 
of  Opinion,  or  outward  Reformation  ;  m«ch  lefs  a  Change 
from  one  Error  to  another,  or  from  one  Sin  to  another  :  but 
an  univerfal  Change,  both  internal  and  external  ;  as  from  cor- 
rupt and  dangerous  Principles  in  Religion,  unto  the  Belief  of 
the  Truth,  fo  from  both  the  Habits  and  Ways  of  Sin,  unto  uni- 
verfal Holinefs  of  Heart  and  Pradlice  j  from  the  Power  and 
Service  of  Satariy  unto  God. 

2.  His  Religion  did  apparently  and  greatly  differ  from  that 
of  many  high  Pretenders  to  Religion,  who  are  frequently  ac- 
tuated by  vehement  Emctiom  of  Mind,  and  are  carried  on  in  a 
Courfe  o{  fudden  2.T\^Jirong  Impreffions^  and  fuppofed  high  Illu- 
minations and  immediate  Difcoveries^  and  at  the  fame  Time  are 
Perfons  of  a  virulent  Zeal^   not  according  to  Knowledge, 

His  Convidions,  preceedinghis  Convej;rion,  did  not  arife 
from  any  frightful  Imprtffions  on  his  Imagination,  or  any  external 
Images  and  Ideas  of  Fire  and  Brimftone,  a  Sword  of  Vengeance 
drawn,  a  dark  Pit  open.  Devils  in  terrible  Shapes,  ^c.  ftrongly 
lix*d  in  hisMind.  His  Sight  of  his  own  Sinfulnefs  did  not  con- 
fift  in  anylmagination  of  a  heap  of  loathfome  material  Filthinefs 
within  him;  nor  did  his  Scnfc  of  the  Hardnefs  of  his  Heart 
confilt  in  any  bodily  feeling  in  his  Breaft  foraething  hard  and 
heavy  like  a  Stone,  nor  in  any  Imaginations  whatever  of  fuch 

a  Nature. 

His 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.  279 

His  firft  Difcovery  of  God  or  Chrift,  at  his  Converfion,  was 
not  any  ftrong  Idea  of  any  external  Glory  or  Brightnefs,  or 
Majetty  and  Beauty  of  Countenance,  or  pleafant  Voice  5  nor 
was  it  any  fuppofed  immediate  Manifeftation  of  God's  Love 
to  him  in  particular  ;  nor  any  Imagination  of  Chrift's  fmiling 
Face,  Arms  open,  or  Words  immediately  fpoken  to  him,  as 
by  Name,  revealing  Chrifl's  Love  to  him ;  either  Words  of 
Scriptare,  or  any  other  :  But  a  Manifeftation  of  God's  Glory, 
and  the  Beauty  of  his  Nature,  as  fupremely  excellent  in  it  felf ; 
powerfully  drawrng,and  fweetly  captivating  hisHearc ;  bringing 
him  to  a  hearty  Defire  to  exalt  God,  fet  him  on  the  Throne> 
and  give  him  fupreme  Honour  and  Glory,  as  the  King  and 
Sovereign  of  the  Univerfe  ;  and  alfo  a  newSenfe  of  the  infinite 
Wifdom,  Suitablenefs  and  Excellency  of  the  Way  of  Salvation 
by  Chrift  ;  powerfully  engagmg  his  whole  Soul  to  embrace 
this  Way  of  Salvation,  and  to  delight  in  it.  His  firft  Faith  did 
not  confift  in  believing  that  Chrift  loved  him,  and  died  for  him, 
in  particular.  Hib  firft  Comfort  was  not  from  any  fecret  Sug- 
geftion  of  God's  Eternal  Love  to  him,  or  that  God  was  recon- 
ciled to  him,  or  intended  great  Mercy  for  him  ;  by  any  fuch 
Texts  as  thofe.  Son,  be  of  good  Cheat ,  thy  Sins  ate  forgiven  thee  i. 
Fear  not,  1  am  thy  God,  &c.  or  in  any  fuch  Way.  On  the 
contrary,  when  GOD's  Glory  was  firft  difcovered  to  him,  it 
was  without  any  Thought  of  Salvation  as  his  own.  His  firffe 
Experience  of  the  fandlifying  &  comforting  Power  of  GOD's 
Spirit  did  not  begin  in  fome  bodily  Senfation,  any  pleafant 
warmFeeling  in  his  Breaft,  that  he  (  as  fome  others  )  called  the 
Feeling  the  Love  of  Chrift  in  him,  and  being  full  of  the  Spirit. 
How  exceeding  far  were  his  Experiences  at  his  firft  Converlio^ 
from  Things  ef  fuch  a  Nature  ! 

And  if  we  look  thro'  the  whole  Series  of  his  Experiences,' 
from  his  Converfion  to  his  Death,  we  (hall  find  none  of  this 
Kind.  I  have  had  Occafion  to  read  his  Diary  over  and  over, 
and  very  particulacJy  andcritically  to  review  eve ryPafTage  in  it; 
and  1  find  no  one  Inftance  of  a  ftrong  Impreflion  on  his  Ima- 
gination, through  his  whole  Life  :  No  Inftance  cf  a  ftrongly 
imprefs'd  Idea  of  any  external  Glory  and  Brightnefs,  of  any 
bodily  Form  or  Shape,  any  beautiful  Majeftick  Countenance  : 
No  imaginary  Sight  of  Chrift  hanging  on  the  Crofs,  wi«h  his 
Blood  ftreaming  from  his  Wounds  ;  or  feated  in  Heaven  on  a 
bright  Throne, with  Angels  and  Saints  bowingbefore  him  ;  or 
with  a  Countenance  fmiling  on  him  ;  or  Arms  open  to  embrace 
him  :  No  Sight  of  Heaven,  in  his  Imagination,  with  Gatestof 

O  o  Pearl, 


:28o  Rcfle^ioiis.  and  Obfervations 

MurT,  and  Golden  Streets,  and  vaft  Multitudes  of  glorious  In- 
liabitants,  with  fhining  Garments  ;  No-Sight  of  the  Book  of 
Life  opened,  with  his  Name  written  in  it  :  No  hearing  of  the 
fweet  Mufeck  made  by  the  Songs  of  heavenly  Hofts  5  No  hear- 
ing;^flfod  or  Chrifl  immediately  fpeaking  to  him  ;  nor  any  fud- 
den^ggeftions  of  Words  or  Sentences,  either  Words  of 
"igeripture,  or  any  other,  as  then  imnaediately  fpoken  or  fent 
to  him  •  No  new  objective  Revelations, no  fudden  ftrong  Sug- 
geftions  of  fecretFadls.  Nor  do  I  find  any  one  Inftance  in  all 
the  Records  he  has  left  of  his  own  Life, from  Beginning  toEnd, 
of  Joy  excited  from  a  fuppofed  immeaiaieWitnt(s  of  theSpirit; 
or  inward  immediate  Suggeftion,  that  his  State  was  furely 
good,  that  God  loved  him  with  an  everlaftingLove,  that  Chrift 
died  for  him  in  particular,  and  that  Heaven  was  his  ;  cither 
with  or  without  a  Text  of  Scripture  :  No  Inflance  ofComfort 
by  a  fudden  bearing  in  upon  hisMind,  as  tho'  at  that  veryTime 
diredled  by  God  to  him  in  particular,  any  fuch  kind  of  Texts 
as  thofe  5  Fear  not.  Jam  with  thee  ;  —  It  is  your  Father^ s  good 
Tleajure  to  give  you  the  Kingdom  ;  —  You  have  not  chofen  me^ 
^ut  1  have  chofen  you  ;  —  /  have  called  thee  by  thy  Name,  thou 
art  mine  ;  •« —  Before  thou  waji  formed  in  the  Belly,  I  knew 
lhee,&iQ.  No*  fuppofedCommunion  &  Converfation  with  GOD 
carried  on  in  this  Way  3  no  fuch  fuppofed  Tafting  of  the  Love 
ofChrift.  But  the  Way  he  was  fatisfied  of  his  own  goodEftate, 
even  to  the  entire  abolifhing  of  Fear,  was  by  Feeling  within 
himfelf  the  lively  adings  of  a  holy  Temper  and  heavenly  Dif- 
pofitionjthe  vigorous  Exercifes  of  that  divineLove, which  cafts 
out  Fear  :  This  was  the  Way  he  had  full  Satisfadlion  fqon  af- 
ter his  Converfion  (  fee  his  Diary  on  O^ob.  18  5c  19.  1740.) 
And  we  find  no  other  Way  of  Satfsfa<Stion  through  his  whole 
Life  afterwards  :  And  this  he  abundantly  declared  to  be  the 
Way,  the  only  Way,  that  he  had  complete  Saiisfadion,  when 
he  looked  Death  in  the  Face,  in  it's  near  Approaches, 

Some  of  the  Pretenders  to  an  immediate  Witnefs  by  Suggefti- 
on,  and  Defenders  of  it,  with  an  afiuming Confidence,  would 
bear  us  in  Hand,  that  there  is  no  full  AfTurance  without  it  ; 
and  that  the  Way  of  being  fatisfied  by  Signs,  and  arguing  an 
Intereit  in  Chrift  from  Sanilification,  if  it  will  keep  Men  qui- 
et in  Life  and  Health,  yet  wjjl  never  do  when  they  come  to 
die :  Then  (  they  fay  )  Men  muft  have  immediate  Witnefs,  or 
cHe  be  in  a  dreadful  Uncertainty.  But  Mr.  /?r^/«^rr^'s Experi- 
ence is  a  Confutation  of  this  ;  for  in  him  we  have  an  Inftance 
©f  CMC  that  pofTcf&'d  as  cgnft^nt  and  unfhaken  an  AiFurance^ 
_  .  thro' 


On  the  preceedlng  Memoirs.  -*fi^t 

(faro'  the  Courfe  of  his  Life,  after  Con vcrfion,  as  perhaps  can 
be  produced  in  this  Age  ;  which  yet  he  obtained  and  enjoyM 
without  any  fuch  Sort  of  Te/iimony^  and  without  all  Manner  of 
Appearance  ofitjOrPretence  to  it  ;  yea, while  utterly  difclaim- 
ing  any  fuch  Thing,  and  declaring  againft  it :  And  one  whofe 
Afturance,we  need  not  fcruple  to  affirm,  has  as  fairaCiaim,and 
as  juft  a  Pretenfion  to  Truth  and  Genuinenefs,  as  any  that  the 
Pretenders  to  immediate  IVitnefs  can  produce  :  And  not  only 
an  Inftance  of  one  that  had  fuch  AfTurance  in  Life,  but  had  it 
in  a  conftant  Manner  in  his  laft  Illnefs  ;  and  particularly  in 
the  latter  Stages  of  it,  through  thofe  laft  Months  of  his  Life, 
wherein  Death  was  more  fenfibly  approaching,  without  the 
leaft  Hope  of  Life  :  And  had  it  too  in  it's  Fulnefs^  and  in  the 
Height  of  it*s  Exercife,  under  thofe  repeated  Trials,  that  he 
had  in  this  Space  of  Time  ;  when  brought  from  Time  toTime 
to  the  very  Brink  of  the  Grave,  expeding  in  a  fewMinutes  to 
be  in  Eternity.  He  had  the  full  JJfurance  of  Hope,  unto  the 
End,  .  When  on  the  Verge  of  Eternity,  he  then  declares  his 
Affurance  to  be  fuch  as  perfectly  fecluded  all  Fear  ;  and  not 
only  fo,  but  it  manifeftly  fill'd  his  Soul  with  exceeding  Joy  : 
He  declaring  at  the  fame  Time,  that  this  his  Confolation  and 
good  Hope  thro'  Grace  arofe  wholly  from  the  Evidence  he  had 
of  his  good  Ethtc,  by  what  he  found  of  his  Sandification,  or 
theExercife  of  a  holy  heavenlyTemper  of  MindJupreme  Love 
to  God,  ^c.  and  not  in  the  leaft  from  any  immediate  Wjtnefs 
by  Suggeftion  :  Yea,  he  declares  that  at  thcfe  very  Times  he 
faw  the  awful  Delufion  of  that  Confidence  which  is  built  on 
fuch  a  Foundation,  as  well  as  of  the  whole  of  that  Religion 
which  it  ufually  fprings  from,  or  at  leaft  is  the  Attendant  of  5 
and  that  his  Soul  abhor'd  thofe  Delufions  :  And  he  continued 
jn  this  Mind, often  expreliing  it  with  much  Solemnity, even 'till 
Death. 

Mr.  Brainerd's  Religion  was  not  fe/fi/b  and  mercenary  :  His 
Love  to  God  was  primarily  and  principally  for  the  fupreme 
Excellency  of  his  own  Nature,  and  not  built  on  a  preconceived 
Notion  that  God  loved  him^  had  received  him  into  Favour, and 
had  done  greatThings /^r  him^ox  promifed  greatThings  to  him  : 
So  hisjoy  was  Joy  in  God, and  not  in  himlelf.  We  fee  by  his 
Diary  how,  from  Time  to  Time,  through  the  Courfe  of  hi§ 
Lite,  his  Soul  was  fill'd  with  ineffable  Sweetnefs  and  Comfort. 
But  what  was  the  Spring  of  this  ftrong  and  abiding  Confo- 
lation ?  Not  fo  much  the  Confideration  of  the  fu re  Grounds 
he  had  to  think  that  his  State  was  good, that  God  had  delivered 

O  o  2  hins 


2S2  Refleaions  and  Obfervations 

him  from  Hell,  and  (hat  Heaven  was  his ;  or  any  Thoughts 
concerning  his  own  diftinguilhed  happy  and  exalted  Circum- 
ftances,  as  a  high  Favourite  of  Heaven:  But  the  fweet  Medi- 
tations and  entertaining  Views  he  had  of  divine  Things  without 
himfelf  ',  the  afFcdling  Confiderations  and  hvely  Ideas  of  God's 
infinite  Glory,  his  unchangeable  BlefTednefs,  his  Sovereignty 
and  univerfal  Dominion  ;  together  with  the  fwcet  Exereifes  of 
Love  to  GOD,  giving  himfelf  up  to  him,  abafing  himfelf  be- 
fore him, denying  himfelf  for  him,  depending  upon  him,  adting 
for  his  Glory,  diligently  ferving  him  ;  and  the  pleafmg  Prof- 
pe6ls  or  Hopes  he  had  of  a  future  Advancement  of  the  Kmg- 
dom  of  Chrift,  ^c. 

It  appears  plainly  and  abundantly  all  aIong,from  hisConver- 
fion  to  hi^  Death,  that  that  Beauty,  that  Sort  of  Good,  which 
was  the  great  Object  of  the  new  Scnfc  of  his  Mind,  the  new 
Relifh  and  Appetite  given  him  in  Converfion,  and  thencefor- 
ward maintained  and  increafed  in  his  Heart,  was  HOLINESS, 
(Conrormsty  to  God,  living  to  God,  and  glorifying  Him,  This 
tvas  what  drew/  hisHeart  ;  this  was  the  Center  of  his  Soul  ;  this 
was  the  Ocean  to  which  all  the  Streams  of  his  religious  Affec- 
tions tended  :  This  was  the  Obje6f  that  engaged  his  eager 
thirflingDefires  and  earned  Purfuits  :  He  knew  no  true  Excel- 
lency or  Happiriefs,  bat  this:  This  was  what  he  longed  for 
jnoft  vehemently  and  conttantly  on  Earth  ;  and  this  was  with 
him  the  Beauty  and  Bleffednefs  of  Heaven  ;  which  made  him  fo 
much  and  fo  often  to  long  for  that  World  of  Glory  ;  it  was  to 
be  perfe^^lyholy,  and  perfecStly  exercifed  in  the  holy  Employ- 
ments of  Heaven  ;  thus  to  glorifvGod  and  enjoy  him  forever. 

His  religious  Illuminations,  AfFe6tions  and  Comfort  feem'd, 
to  a  great  Degree, to  be  attended  v/\t\i Evangelical  Humiliation  ; 
confiftingin  a  Senle  of  his  own  utter  Infufficiency,Derpicable- 
nefs  andOJioufners  ;  with  an  anfwerable  Difpofition  andprame 
of  Heart.  How  deeply  afrcdled  was  he  almoft  continually  with 
his  greatDcfeds  in  Religion  j  with  his  vaft  Diftance  from  that 
Spirituality  ?.nd  holy  Krame  of  Mind  that  became  him  -,  with 
his  Ignorance,  Pride,  Dcadnefs,  Unfteadinefs,  Bairennefs  f 
He  was  not  only  affeded  with  the  Remembrance  of  his  former 
Sinfu'neHj,  before  his  Converfion,  but  with  the  Senfe  of  his 
preff  t  Vilcnef'^nd  f\)"lution.  He  was  not  only  difpofed  to 
think  meanly  of  himfelf  as  before  God,  and  in  Comparifon  of 
him  5  but  among/I  AUn^  and  as  compared  v/ith.them  :  He  was 
aot  to  think  otherSaiits  better  than  he;  yea,  to  look  on  himfelf 
ai  the  meanelt  and  .'caft  of  Saints  5  yea,  ^Qxy  often,  as  the 
"   ■      '    ■  ■  F-ilcf^ 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.  283 

vHeft  and  worft  of  Mankind.  And  notwithftanding  his  great 
Attainments  in  fpiriiual  Knowledge^  yet  we  find  there  is  fcarce 
any  Thing  that  he  is  more  frequently  afFe6ted  and  abafed  with 
a  Senfe  of,  than  his  Ignorance, 

How  emfnently  did  he  appear  to  be  of  a  meek  and  quiet  Spirit, 
refemblingtheLamb-like,Dove-likeSpiritof  JefusChrift  !  How 
full  of  Love,  Meeknefs,  Quietncfs,  Forgivenefs  and  Mercy  ! 
His  Love  was  not  meerly  a  Fondnefs  and  Zeal  for  a  Party,  but 
an  univerfal  Benevolence  ;  very  often  cxercifed  in  the  moft 
fcnfible  and  ardent  Love  to  his  greatefl  Oppofers  and  Enemies. 
His  Love  and  Meeknefs  were  not  a  meer  Pretence,  and  out- 
ward Profeflion  and  Shew ;  but  they  were  efFe£lual  Things, 
manifefted  in  expenfive  and  painful  Deeds  of  Love  and  Kind- 
nefs  ;  and  in  a  meekBehaviour  ;  readily  confeilingFaults  under 
the  greatefl  Trials,  and  humbling  himfelf  even  at  the  Feet  of 
thofe  from  whom  he  fuppofed  he  had  fufFered  moft  ;  and  from 
Time  to  Time,  yery  frequently  praying  for  his  Enemies,  ab- 
horring the  Thoughts  of  Bitternefs  or  Refentment  towards 
them.  1  fcarcely  know  where  to  look  for  any  parallel  Inftance 
ofSelf-denial,in  thefe  Refpedts,  in  the  prefent  Age.  He  was 
a  Perfon  of  great  Zeal ;  but  how  did  he  abhor  a  bitter  Zeal, 
and  lafnent  it  where  he  faw  it  !  And  tho*  he  was  once  drawn 
into  fome  Degrees  of  it,  by  the  Force  of  prevailing  Example, 
as  it  were  in  his  Childhood  ;  yet  how  did  he  go  about  with  a 
Heart  bruifed  and  broken  in  Pieces  for  it  all  his  Life  after  ! 

Of  how/oft  and  tender  a  Spirit  was  he  !  How  far  were  his 
Experiences,  Hopes, and  Joys  from  a  Tendency  finally  to  flupi- 
iy  and  harden  him,  to  lelTen  Convi6lions  and  Tendernefs  of 
Confcience,  to  caufehim  to  be  lefs  afFeded  with  prefent  and 
paft  Sins,  and  lefs  eonfcientious  with  Refpe£t  to  future  Sins, 
more  eafy  in  the  Negledl  of  Duties  that  are  troublefome  and 
inconvenient,  more  flow  and  partial  in  complying  with  difficult 
Commands,  lefs  apt  to  be  alarmed  at  the  Appearance  of  his 
own  Defeats  andTranfgrellions,  moreeafily  induced  to  a  Com- 
pliance with  carnal  Appetites  !  On  the  contrary,  how  tender 
was  his  Confcience  !  How  apt  was  his  Heart  to  fmite  him  ? 
How  eafily  and  greatly  was  he  alarmed  at  the  Appearance  of 
moral  Evil  !  How  great  and  conftant  was  his  Jealoufy  over 
his  own  Heart !  How  ftrici  his  Care  and  Watchfulnefs  againfi 
Sin  !  How  deep  and  fenfible  were  the  Wounds  that  Sin  made 
in  his  Confcience  I  Thofe  Evils  that  are  generally  accounted 
fmall,  were  almoft  an  infupportabie  Burden  to  him  ;  fuch  as 
his  inward  DeficicncieSjhis  having  no  more  Love  toGOD,find- 


2$4  Reflexions  W  Obfervations 

ing  within  himfelf  any  flacknefs  or  dulnefs  in  Religion,  any 
Unfteadinefs,  or  wandriug  Frame  of  Mind,  &c.  How  did  the 
Confideration  of  fuch.  Things  as  thefe  opprefs  and  abafc  him, 
and  fill  him  with  inward  Shame  and  Confufion  !  HisLove  and 
Hope,  tho*  they  were  fuch  as  call  out  a  fervile  Fear  of  Hell, 
yet  they  were  fuch  as  were  attended  with,and  abundantly  che- 
rifh'd  and  promoted  a  reverential  filial  Fear  of  God,  a  Dread 
ofSinandof  God*s  holy  Difpleafure.  His  Joy  fcem'd  truly 
to  be  a  rejoicing  with  Trembhng.  His  AfTurance  and  Com- 
fort differed  greatly  from  a  falfe  enthufiaftick  Confidence  and 
Joy,  in  that  it  promoted  and  maintained  Mourning  for  Sin  : 
holy  mourning,  with  him,  was  not  only  the  Work  of  an  Hour 
or  a  Day,  at  his  firfl:  Converfion  ;  but  Sorrow  for  Sin  was  like 
aWound  conftantly  running  :  He  was  aMourner  for  Sin  all  his 
Days.  He  did  notjj  after  he  received  Comfort  and  full  Satis- 
faction of  the  Forgivenefs  of  all  his  Sins,  and  the  Safety  of  his 
State,  forget  his  paft  Sins,  the  Sins  of  his  Youth,  that  were 
committed  before  his  Converfion  ;  but  the  Remembrance  of 
them,  from  Time  to  Time,  revived  in  his  Heart,  with  renew- 
ed Grief.  That  in  Ezek.  xvi.  63.  was  evidently  fulfiPd  in 
him,  That  thou  mey/i  remember ^  and  be  confounded ^  and  never  open 
ihy  Mouth  any  more^  becaufe  of  thy  Shame  ;  when  1  am  ^pacified 
toward  thee  for  all  that  thou  haji  done.  And  how  laftingly 
did  the  Sins  that  he  committed  after  his  Converfion,  afFe6land 
break  his  Heart  !  If  he  did  any  Thing  whereby  he  thought  be 
had  in  any  Refpeddifhonoured  God,  and  wounded  thelntereft 
of  Religion,  he  had  never  done  with  calling  it  to  Mind  with 
Sorrow  and  Bitternefs :  Tho'  he  was  afTured  that  God  had 
forgiven  it,  yet  he  never  forgave  himfelf  :  His  paft  Sorrows 
and, Fears  made  no  Satisfadion,  with  him  ;  but  ftill  the  Wound 
renews  and  bleeds  afrefh,  again  and  again.  And  his  prefent 
Sin?,  that  he  daily  found  in  himfelf,  were  an  Occafion  of  daily 
fenfiblc  and  deep  Sorrow  of  Heart. 

His  Religion  did  not  confift  in  unaccountable  Flights  and 
vehement  Pangs  ;  fuddenly  rifing,  and  fuddenly  falling  ;  at 
fome  Turns  exalted  almoft  to  the  third  Heavens,  and  then  at 
other  Turns  negligent,  vain, carnal,  and  fwallowed  up  with  the 
World;  for  Days  and  Weeks,  if  not  Months  together.  His 
Religion  v/as  not  like  a  blazingMeieor,or  like  a  flamingComet, 
(or  a  wandring  Star, as  the  Apoftle7«^^  calls  it,  ver.  13 J  flying 
thro'  theFirmament  with  a  brightTrain  ;  &  then  quickly  going 
out  in  perfedtDarknefs :.  But  more  like  the  fteadyLightc  ofHea- 
ven }   that  are  confiant  Principles  of  J-aght,  tho*  fometimes  hid 

with 


On  the  preceding  Memoirs.  2  S5 

v/hh  Clouds.  Nor  like  a  Land-Flood,  which  flows  far  and 
wide,  with  a  rapid  Stream,  bearing  down  all  afore  it,  and  thea 
dried  up;  but  more  like  a  Stream  fed  by  livingSprinps  ;  which 
tho'  fometimes  mcreafed  by  Showers,  and  at  other  Times  di- 
minifhed  by  Drought,  yet  is  a  conjiant  Stream, 

His  religious  AfFedlions  and  Joys  were  not  like  thofe  of 
fome,  who  have  Rapture  and  mighty  Emotions  from  T<me  to 
Time  in  Company  j  but  hav,e  very  little  AfFeaion  in  Retirement 
and  fecret  Places.  Tho*  he  was  of  a  very  fociablcTemper,  and 
loved  thcCompany  ofSainis,and  delighted  very  much  in  religi- 
ous Converfation  and  infocial  Worfhip  ;  yet  his  warmeft  Af- 
fedions  and  their  greateft  EfFeds  on  animal  Nature,  and  his 
^  fweeteftjoys,  were  in  his  Clofet-DevetionSjand  folitaryTranf- 
adtions  between  God  and  his  own  Soul  ;  as  is  very  obfervable 
thro'  his  whole  Courfe,  from  his  Converiion  to  his  Death.  He 
delighted  greatly  in  facredRetirements ;  and  loved  to  get  quite 
away  from  all  the  World,  toconverfe  withGoD  alone,in  fecret 
Duties. 

Mr,  Brainerd*s  Experiences  and  Comforts  were^very  far 
from  being  like  thofe  of  fome  Perfons, which  are  attended  with 
a  rpiritual  Satiety^  and  put  an  End  to  their  religious  Defines  and 
Longings,  at  leaft  to  the  Edge  and  Ardency  of  them  ;  reftin^; 
fatisfied  in  their  own  Attainments  and  Comforts,  as  having  ob- 
tained their  chief  End,  which  is  to  extinguifh  their  Fears  of 
Hell,  and  give  'em  Confidence  of  the  Favour  of  GOD.  How 
far  were  his  religious  AiFe6tions,Refre{hments,  &  Satisfadlions, 
from  fuch  an  Operation  and  Influence  as  this  !  On  the  contra- 
ry, how  were  they  always  attended  with  Longings  an-'  Thirft- 
ings  after  greater  Degrees  of  Canformity  toijOD  !  And  the 
greater  and  fweeter  his  Comforts  were,  the  more  vehement 
were  his  Defires  after  Holinefs.  For  'tis  to  be  obferved,  ihac 
hisLongings  were  notfo  much  after  joyfulDifcoveries  of  God's 
Love  and  clear  Views  of  his  Title  to  future  Advancement  and 
eternal  Honours  in  Heaven  ;  «s  after  more  of  prcfent  Holinclii, 
greater  Spirituality,  an  Heart  more  engaged  for  GOD,  to  love 
and  exalt  and  deperid  on  hirrf,  an  Ability  better  to  ferve  him, 
to  do  more  for  bis  Glory,  and  to  do  all  that  he  did  with  more 
of  a  Regard  to  Chrift  as  his  Righteoufnefs  and  Strength  ;  and 
after  the  Enlargement  and  Advancement  of  Chrift'sKingdorn 
in  the  Earth.  And  his  Defires  were  not  idle  wifhings  and 
wouldings,  but  fuch  as  were  povverlul  and  cfFcdiual,  to  ann- 
mate  him  to  the  earnefl,  eager  purfuit  of  thefc  Things,  with 
wimoft  Diligence  and  unfainimg  Labc/ur  and  Scll^denial.    Hij 

Com  fur  t» 


286  Refle6lions  fl»^  ObfcrvationS 

Comforts  never  put  an  End  to  his  feeking  after  GOD,  and 
flriving  to  obtain  his  Grace  ;  but  on  the  contrary,  greatly  en- 
gaged and  enlarged  him  therein. 

His  Religion  did  not  confiftonly  inExperiencSiW'uhout  Prac-^ 
iice.  All  his  inward  Illuminations,  AfFed^ions  and  Comforts 
feem'd  to  have  adiredl  Tendency  to  Pradlice,  and  to  illue  in 
it !  And  this,  notmeerly  a  Pra<5tice  negatively  good,  free  from 
grofs  A6ls  of  Irreljgion  and  Immorality  ;  But  a  Pradlice  poji-" 
lively  Holy  and  Chriliian,  in  a  ferious,  devout,  humble,  meek, 
merciful,  charitable,  and  beneficent  Conveifation  ;  making 
the  Service  of  GOD,  and  our  Lord  Jefus  Chrift,  the  greatBu- 
fmefs  of  Life,  which  he  was  devoted  to,  and  purfued  with  the 
greateft  Earneftnefs  and  Diligence  to  the  End  of  his  Days, 
thro'  all  Trials.  In  him  was  to  be  feen  the  right  Way  of  be- 
ing lively  in  Religion  :  His  Livelimfs  in  Religion  did  not  confift 
meerly  or  mainly  in  his  being  lively  with  the  Tongue^  but  in 
Deed  \  not  in  being  forward  in  Profeflion  and  outward  Shew, 
and  abundant  in  declaring  his  own  Experiences  j  but  chiefly  in 
being  a6tive  and  abundant  in  theLabours  &Duties  of  Religion  ; 
not  flothful  in  Bvfmefs^  but  fervent  in  Spirit,  ferving  the  Lord, 
and  ferving  his  Generation^  according  to  the  mil  of  God, 

By  thefe  Things,  many  high  Pretenders  to  Religion, andPro- 
fefTors  of  •extraordinary  fpiritual  Experience,  may  be  fenfible, 
that  Mr.  Brainerd  did  greatly  condemn  their  kind  of  Religion; 
and  that  not  only  in  Word, but  byExample,bo;h  living  and  dy- 
ing ;  as  the  whole  Series  of  his  Chriftian  Experience  andPrac- 
ticc,  from  his  Converfion  to  his  Death,  appears  a  conftantCon- 
demnation  of  it. 

It  can*t  be  obje6led,that  theReafon  why  he  fo  much  difliked 
the  Religion  of  ihefePretenders,  and  why  his  own  fo  much  dif- 
fered from  it,  was,  that  his  Experiences  werenot  clear.  There 
is  no  Room  to  fay,  they  were  otherwife,  in  any  Refpedt,  in 
which  Clearnefs  of  Experience  has  been  wont  to  be  infifted  on; 
whether  it  be  the  Clearnefs  of  thftir  Nature,  or  of  their  0*der^ 
and  the  Method  his  Soul  was  at  firil  brought  toRelt  ar.d  Com- 
fort in  his  Conveifion.  I  am  (ar  from  thinking  (  and  fe  was 
he)  that  Clearnefs  of  the  Order  of  Experience  is,  in  any  Mea- 
fure,  of  equal  Importance  with  the  Clearnefs  of  their  I>iature  : 
I  have  fufficiently  declared  in  my  Difcourfe  on  Religious  J ffiHi- 
ens  (uhichhe  exprefly  approved  of  and  recommended  )  that  I 
cJon't  ruppofe,a  fenfible  Dif^ind^nefs  of  the  5r^piof  the  Spirit's 
Operation  and  Method  of  fuccefTive  Cojividions  and  Illumina- 
riwns,  isaneccllary  Fcquifitc  to  Pcrfons  being  received  in  full 

Chanty, 


Oh  the  preceedhg  Memoirs.  '287 

Charity,  as  true  Saints  ;  provided  the  Nature  of  the  Things 
they  profefs,  be  right,  and  their  Praaice  agreeable.  Ncverthc- 
lefs,  'fis  obfervable,  (  which  cuts  off  allObjedlion  from  fuch  at 
would  be  moft  unreafonably  difpofed  to  objca  and  cavil  in  the 
prefentCafe  )  So  it  was,  that  Mr.Srainerd^Exptnenccs  were 
not  only  clear  in  the  latter  RefpecS,  but  remarkably  fo  in  the 
former  :  So  that  there  is  not  perhaps  one  Inftance  infiveHun- 
dred  rue  Converts,  that  on  this  Account  can  be  parallel'd 
with  him- 

It  can*t  be  pretended  ,  that  the  Reafon  why  he  fo  much  ab- 
hor'd  andcondmncd  the  Notions  and  Experiences  of  thofe 
whofe/r/?  Faith  conCilis  in  believing  that  Chrifl//  iheirsy  and 
that  Chrift  ^/W  Ar  them  ;  without  any  previous  Experience  of 
Union  of  Heart  to  him,  for  his  Excellency,  as  he  is  in  himfelf, 
and  not  for  his  fuppufed  Love  to  them  ;  and  who  judge  of  their 
Intereft  in  Chrift,  their  Juftificaiion,  and  GOD's  Love  to 
them,  not  by  their  Sanilification  and  the  Exercifes  and  Fruits 
of  Grace,  but  by  a  fuppofed  immediate  Witnefsof  the  Spirit,  by 
inward  Suggeftion  ;  I  fay,  it  can*t  be  pretended,  that  theRea- 
fon  why  he  fo  much  deteftcd  and  condemned  fuch  Opinions 
and  Experiences,  was,  that  he  was  of  a  too  legal  Spirit  ;  either 
that  he  never  was  dead  to  the  Law,  never  experienced  a  thoro' 
Work  of  Convi£lion,was  never  fully  brought  off  from  his  own 
Righteoufnefs,and  wean'd  from  the  old  Covenant ^hy  a  thorough 
legal  Humiliation  ;  or  that  afterwards,  he  had  no  great  De- 
gree of  fvaw^W/W  Humiliation,  not  living  in  a  deep  Senfe  of 
his  own  Empiinefs,  Wretchednefs,  Poverty,  and  abfolute  Dc- 
pendance  on  the  meer  Grace  of  GOD  through  Chrift.  For 
hisConvidlions  of  Sin,preceedinghis  lirflConfolations  inChrift» 
were  exceeding  deep  and  thorough  ;  his  Trouble  and  Exercifc 
of  Mind,  by  a  Senfe  of  Sin  and  Mifery,  very  great  and  long 
continued  ;  &  theLight  let  into  hisMind  at  hisConverfion  and 
in  progrefiive  Satidtification,  appears  to  have  had  its  genuine 
humbling  Influence  upon  him,  to  have  kept  him  low  in  his 
ownEves,not  confiding  in  himfelf,  but  in  Chrift,  living  by  thi 
Faith  of  the  Son  of-  GODi  and  looking'  for  the  Adercy  of  the  Lord 
yejus  to  eternal  Life. 

Nor  can  it  be  pretended,  that  theReafon  why  he  condemned 
tbofe,  and  other  Things,  which  this  Sort  of  People  call  the  very 
Height  of  vital  Religion  and  the  Power  of  Godlinefs,  was,tr.ac 
he  was  a  dead  Chri/iian,  and  lived  in  the  Dark  (as  they  exprcfs 
themfclves  )  that  his  Experiences,  tho'  they  mipht  be  frur, 
were  not  great  5  that  he  did  not  live  near  to  GOD,  had  but  a 

P  p  fmall 


28S  Reflexions  and  Obfervations 

fmall  Acquaintance  with  him,  and  had  but  a  dim  Sight  of  fpi- 
ritual  Things.  If  any,  after  they  have  read  the  preceeding 
Account  of  Mr.  ^rfl/?2fr^'s  Life,  will  venture  to  pretend  thus, 
they  will  only  (hew  that  they  them/elves  are  in  the  Dark^  and 
do  indeed  put  Darknefsfor  Lights  and  Light  for  Darknefs, 

'Tis  common  with  this  Sort  of  People,    if  there  is  any  one 
whom  they  can't  deny  to  exhibit  goodEvidencesof  true  God- 
linefs,who  yet  appears  to  diflike  theirNotions,&  condemn  thofe 
Things  wherein  they  place  theHeight  of  Religion, to  infmuate, 
that  they  are  afraid  of  the  Crofs^  and  have  a  Mind  to  curry  Pa' 
vour  with  the  World,  and  the  like.     But  I  pre  fume,  this   will 
not  be  pretended  concerning  Mr.  Brainerd,  by  any  one  Perfon 
that  has  read  the  preceeding  Account  of  hisLife.  It  rauft  needs 
appear  aThing  notorious  to  fuch,that  he  was  an  extraordinary, 
and  almoft   unparallel'd  Inflance  (  in  ibefe  Times  and  thefe 
Parts  of  the  World  )  of  the  contrary  Difpofition  :  and  ihat^ 
whether  we  confider  what  he  has  recorded  of  his  inward  Ex- 
ferience,  from  Time  to  Time ;    or  his  PraSf ice yhow  he  in  Fa6l 
took  up  and   embraced  the    Crofs^    and  bore  it  conftantly,  in 
his  great  Self- Denials,  Labours,  and  Sufferings   for  the  Name 
of  Jefus,  and   went  on  without   fainting,  without   repenting, 
or  repining,  to  his  dying  lllnefs  :  How  he  did  not  only,  from 
Time  to  Time,  rellnquiOi  and  renounce  the   ^or/^  fecretly, 
in  his  Heart,  with  the  full  and  ferventConfent  of  all  thePowers 
of  his  Soul  ;  but  openly  and  adtually  forfook  the  Worldy  with 
it's  Pofleifions,  Delights,  and  common  Comforts,  to  dwell  as 
it  were  with  wild  Beafts,  in  a  howling Wildernefs  ,  with  con- 
ftant  Chearfulnefs,  complying  with  the  numerous  Hardfhips 
of  a  Life  of  Toil  and  Travel  there,  to  promote  the  Kingdom 
ef  his  dear  Redeemer.   And  befides,  it  appears  by  the  preceed- 
ing Hiiiory,  that  he  never  did  more  condemn  the  Things  fore- 
mentioned,    never  had  a  greater  Senfe  of  their  Delufion,  per- 
nicious Nature,  and  ill  Tendency,  and  never  was  more  full  of 
Pity  to  thofe  that  are    led  away  with   them,  than    in    his  laft 
lilnefs, and  atTimes  when  he  had  the  neareflPtofpedt  of  Death, 
fuppofed  himfelfto  be  on  the  very  Brink  of  Eternity, and  looked 
on  all    this  lower  World  as    what  he  never  fliould  have  any 
Thing  more  to  do  with.     Surely  he  did  not  condemn  thofe 
Things  at  thefe  Seafons,   only  to  curry  Favour  with  the  fVorld, 
Befides  what  has  been  a^iieady  related  of  Mx.Brainerd's  Sen- 
timents in  his  dying  State    concerning  true  and  falfe  Religion, 
we  have  his  deliberate  and  iblemn  Tho'ts  on  this  Subje<SV,  fur- 
ther appcanng  by  his  Preface  to  Mr.  Shepard*i  Diary,   before 

mentioned  % 


On  the  precetdtng  Memoirs:  sg^ 

aicntioned  ;  which,  when  he  wrote  if,  he  fuppofcd  to  be  (  as 
itproved)  one  oiiht  laji  Things  he  fhould  ever  write.  1  (hall 
here  infert  a  Part  of  that  Preface^  as  follows. 

"  How  much  Strefs  is  laid  by  many  upon  fome  Things  as 
•^  being  EfFe6ls  andEvidences  of  exalted  Degrees  of  Religion, 
*<  when  they  are  fo  far  from  being  of  any  Importance  in  it' 
««  that  they  are  really  irreligious,  ^MmuxtoiSelf-Lovi.lma" 
<«  ^/»fl//5«,  and  fpiritual  Pr/^^,  or  perhaps  the  Influence  of 
««  5fl/fl« transformed  into  anAngel  ofLight  ;  I  fay, how  much 
««  Strefs  is  laid  on  thefeThings  by  many,!  fliall  not  determine  : 
•<  But 'tismuch  to  be  fear'd,  that  while  GOD  was  carrying 
««  on  a  glorious  Work  of  Grace,  and  undoubtedly  gathering 
*«  a  Harveft  of  Souls  to  himfelf  (  which  we  fl^ould  always  re- 
*'  member  with  Thankfulnefs)  Numbers  of  others  have  at  the 
*«  fame  Time  been  fatally  deluded  by  the  Devices  of  theDevil, 
*'  and  their  swn  corrupt  Hearts.  It  is  to  be  fear'd,  that  the 
**  Canv^rfions  oi  fosne  have  no  better  Foundation  than  this  ; 
*«  viz.  That  after  they  have  been  under  feme  Concern  fof 
*'  their  Souls  for  a  while,  and  it  may  be  manifefted  fome 
*'  very  great  and  uncommon  Diftrefs  and  Agonies,  they 
**  have  on  a  fudden  imagined  they  fawCuRi st ^in  fomePofture 
*'  or  other  ;  perhaps  on  theCrofs,  bleeding  and  dying  for  their 
*«  Sins  ;  or  it  may  be,  fmiling  on  them,  and  thereby  fignify- 
*'  ing  his  Love  to  them  :  And  that  thefe  and  the  like  Things, 
*'  tho' meer  Imaginations,  which  have  nothing  Spiritual  in 
*'  them,  have  inflantly  removed  all  their  Fears  and  Diftrefl'es, 
*'  fill'd  them  with  Raptures  of  Joy,  and  made  them  imagine, 
<«  that  they  loved  Chrifi  with  all  their  Hearts  ;  when  theBot- 
*'  torn  of  all  was  Nothing  but  Self-love*  For  when  they  ima- 
*'  gined  that  Chrifthad  been  fo  good  to  them  as  to  fave  them, 
*'  and  as  it  were  to  fingle  them  out  of  all  the  World,  they 
*'  could  not  but  feel  fome  kind  of  natural  Gratitude  to  him  ; 
*«  altho*  they  never  had  any  fpiritual  View  of  his  divineCilory, 
•*  Excellency  and  Beauty,  and  confequently  never  had  any 
*'  Love  to  him  for  himfelf.  Or  that  inftead  of  having  fome 
*<  fuch  imaginary  View  of  Chrift  as  has  been  mention'd,  in 
*•  order  to  remove  their  Diftrefs  and  give  them  Joy,  fome 
«'  having  had  a  Paflage,  or  perhaps  many  Paflages  of  Scriptun 
*«  brought  to  their  Minds  with  Power  (  as  they  exprefs  it  ) 
*«  fuch  as  that,  Son^  he  of  good  Chear.thy  Sins  are  forgiven  thee^ 
*'  and  the  like,  thev  have  immediately  applied  thefe  Paflages 
<«  to  themfehes^  fuppoflng  that  God  hereby  manifefted  his 
«^  peculiar  Favour  to  them,  as  if  mention'd  by  Name  :  Never 

|»  p  2  confitlcrirgi 


290  Reflexions  and  Obfervarions 

•«  confidering,  that  they  are  now  giving  Heed  to  new  Revc- 
««  latrons  ;  there  being  no  fuch  Thing  leveal'd  in  the  Word 
««  of  God,  as  that  this  or  that  parncu!ar  Perfon  has,  or  ever 
<«  (hall  have  his  Sins  forgiven  ;  nor  ye;  remembring,  that  5a- 
•'  tan  can,  with  a  great  deal  of  feeming  Perrnency  ( and  per- 
*<  haps  alfo  with  confiderable  Power)  bring  Scripture  to  the 
*«  Minds  of  Men, as  he  did  10  Chrift  himfeh.  Anu  ihus  ihefe 
*'  rejoyce  upon  having  fome  Scripture  fuddenS  fuggelted  to 
«'  them,  or  imprefs'd  upon  their  Minds,  fuppofing  they  are 
**  now  the  Children  ot  God,  juft  as  did  the  other  upon  their 
•*  imaginary  Views  of  Chrift.  And  'tis  faid,  that  fome  fpeak 
**  of  feeing  a  gre2itLight,  which  flli'd  all  the  Place  where  they 
««  were,  and  difpePd  all  their  Darkncfs,  Fears  and  DifirefTes, 
•'  and  almoft  ravifti'd  their  Souls.  While  others  have  had  it 
*«  warmly  fuggefted  to  their  Minds,  not  by  any  PafTage  of 
'^  Scripture,  but  as  it  were  by  a  Whifper  or  Voice  from  Hea- 
'«  ven,  Jhat  God  loves  them,  that  Chrifl  is  theirs y  &c.  which 
*<  groundlcfs  Imagiiiations  and  Suggef^ion?  o;  Satan  have  had 
*'  the  fame  Effed  upon  them,  that  the  Delufions  before  men- 

*<   tion'd  had  on  the  others. And  as  is  the  Converfion 

*«  of  this  Sort  of  Perfons,  fo  are  their  After- Experiences  j  the 
«'  whole  being  built  upon  Imaginati  in,ftrong  ImpreflionSjand 
<<  fudaen  Suggcftions  made  to  their  Minds  :  Whence  they 
*'  are  ufaally  extreme  confident  (as  if  immediately  informed 
•«  from  God  )  not  only  of  the  Goodnefs  of  their  own  State, 
<<  but  of  their  infallible  Knowledge,  and  abfolute  Certainty, of 
**  the  Truth  of  every  Thing  they  pretend  to,  onder  the  No- 
*'  tion  of  Religion  ;  and  thus  allReafonmg  with  fome  of  them 
•'  is  utterly  excluded. 

*«  But  'cis  remarkable  of  thefe,  that  they  are  extremely  defi' 
*«  cient  in  Regard  of  true  Poverty  of  Spirit,  Senfe  of  exceeding 
**  Vilcnefs  in  themfelves,  fuch  as  frequently  makes  truly  gra- 
•'  cious  Souls  to  grcan,  being  burdened -^  as  alfo  in  Regard  of 
*«  Meeknefs,  Love  and  Gentlenefs  towards  N4ankind,  Ten- 
*<  dernefs  of  Conlcience  in  their  ordinary  AfFiirs  and  Dealings 
*«  in  the  World.  And  'tis  rare  to  fee  *em  deeply  concerned 
*«  about  the  Principles  and  Ends  of  their  Adions,  and  under 
*<  Fears  left  they  fhould  not  eye  the  Glory  of  God  chicfjy, 
*^  but  live  to  themfelves ;  or  this  at  ieaft  is  the  Cafe  in  their 
•'  ordinary  Conduct,  whether  civil  or  religious.  But  if  any 
^*  one  of  their  particular /Vi?//(?;2i, which  theirZeal  hasefpoufed, 
*♦  be  attacked,  they  are  then  fo  confcientious,  they  muft  bum^ 
**  if  cali'd  to  itj  faf  Uie  Defcace  qI  it.  Yet,  at  the  fameTimc, 

<<  when 


On  the  preceedifi^  Memoirs.'  291 

«'  when  they  are  fo  extremely  deficient  in  Regard  of  thefe  preci- 
<«  ous  divine  Tempers  which  have  been  mention'd,  they  arc 
<«  ufually  full  of  Xeal,  Concern  and  Fervency  in  the  Things 
*'  of  Religion,  and  often  difcourfe  of  them  with  mJchWarmth 
*^  and  Engagement :  And  to  thofe  who  clon^  k(iow,or  don't 
<«  confider,  wherein  the  EJfence  of  trueReligion  confifts,  viz, 
*'  in  being  conformed  to  the  Image  of  Chriji^  nut  in  Point  of 
<«  Zealand  Fervency  only,  bat  in  all  divine  Teinpers  and 
<<  Pradtices  ;  I  fay,  to  thofe  who  don't  duly  obferve  and  dif- 
"  tinguifh,  they  often  appear  like  the  beft  of  Men.'* 

'Tis  common  with  this  Sort  of  People  to  fay,  that  God  it 
amon^Ji  themyhis  Spirit  accompanies  their  Exhortations  and  other /fU- 
minijirations^and  they  are  feal*d  by  the  hoiyGhoJi^'m  the  remarka- 
ble Succefs  they  have,  in  the  greatAfFedlinns  that  arc  ftirred  up 
in  God's  People  ^f.  but  to  infinuate,  on  the  contrary,  that 
he  is  not  with  their  Opponents  i  and  particularly,  that  God  has 
forfaken  the /landing  Minifiry  ;  and  thai  the  Time  is  come^  when 
it  is  the  Will  of  God  that  they  fhould  he  put  down,  and  that  God*s 
People  Jhouid  for  fake  'em  ;  and  that  no  more  Succefs  is  to  be  ex- 
peSfed  to  attend  their  A dminifi  rations.-  But  where  can  they  find  aa 
Initance,  among  all  their  moft  flaming  ExhorterSyVf\^o  has  been 
fealed  with  fo  unconteftible  and  wonderful  Succefs  of  his  La- 
bours,as  Mr.  Brainerd,  not  only  in  quickening  and  comforting 
God's  Children,  but  alfo  in  a  Work  of  Conviction  and  Con- 
verfion  (  which  they  own  has  in  a  great  Meafure  ceafcd  for  a 
long  Time  among  themfelv^s  )  with  a  moft  vifible  and  ailo- 
nifhing  Manifcilation  of  God's  Power,  on  Subjedb  fo  unpre- 
pared, and  that  had  been  brought  up  and  lived,  fome  of  them 
to  old  Age,  in  the  deepeft  Prejudices  againft  the  very  firftPrm- 
ciples  of  Chriftianity  ;  the  divine  Power  accompanying  his 
Labours,  producing  the  mofi  remarkable  and  abiding  Change, 
turning  the  Wildernefs  into  a  fruitful  Field,  and  caufing  thac 
which  was  aDefart  indeed  to  bud  and  bloilom  as  theRufe?  And 
this  altho'  he  was  not  only  one  of  their  greatcft  Opponents  in 
their  Errors  j  but  alfo  one  of  thofe  they  call  the  fiandini^  Mi- 
ni/iry  ;  fij  ft  examined  and  licenfed  to  preach  byfuch  Mini/hrs^ 
and  fent  forth  among  the  Heathen  by  fuch  Minijiers  ;  and  af- 
terwards ordained  hy  fuch  Mini flers ;  always  dire^ed  by  them, 
and  united  with  them  in  theirConfiiiorieSjandAdminifhations  ; 
and  even  abhorring  thePraaicc  of  thofe  who  give  out, that  they 
ought  to  be  renounced  and  feparatcd  ffonOj  and  that  Tcacners 
may  be  ordained  by  Lay-Men* 

It 


2p2  Reflexions  and  Obfcrvations 

It  cannot  be  pretended  by  thefe  Men,  that  Mr.  Braintrd 
condemned  their  Religion,  only  becaufe  he  was  noi  acquainted 
with  them^  and  had  not  Opportunity  for  full  Obfervationof  the 
Nature,Operation&  Tendency  of  their  ^A-p^r/ffffw  :  For  he  had 
abundant  and  peculiar  Opportunities  of  fuch  Obfervation  and 
Acquaintance  :  He  lived  through  the  late  extraordinary  Time 
of  religious  Commotion,  and  faw  the  Beginning  and  End,  the 
Good  and  the  Bad  of  it:  He  had  Opportunity  to  fee  the  vari- 
ous Operations  an^  Effedls,  that  were  wrought  in  this  Seafon, 
more  extenfwely^  than  any  Perfon  I  know  of :  His  native  Place 
was  about  the  middle  of  ConneSficut ;  and  he  was  much  con- 
verfant  in  all  Parts  of  that  Colony  :  He  was  converfant  in  the 
Eaflern  Parts  of  it,  after  the  Religion,  which  he  condemned, 
began  much  to  prevail  there  :  He  was  converfant  with  the 
zealous  People  onLong- Ijland  ^from  one  End  of  the  Ifland  to  the 
other  ;  and  alfo  in  New-Jerfey,  and  Pennfylvania  ;  with  Peo- 
ple of  various  Nations  :  He  had  feme  fpecial  Opportunities  ia 
(bme  Places  in  this  Province  (  Majptchufetts-Bay)  where  has 
been  very  much  of  this  Sort  of  Religion,  and  at  a  Time  when 
it  greatly  prevailed  :  He  had  converfed  &  difputed  with  Abun- 
dance of  this  Kind  of  People  in  various  Parts,  as  he  told  me  ; 
and  alfo  informed  me,  that  he  had  feen  fomethiog  of  the  fame 
Appearances  in  fome  of  the  Indians^  whom  he  had  preached  to, 
and  had  Opportunity  to  fee  the  Beginning  and  End  of  them. 
And  befides,  Mr.  Braimrd  could  fpeak  more  feelingly  and  un- 
derftandingly  concerning  thefe  Things,  becaufe  there  was  once 
a  Time  when  he  was  drawn  away  into  an  Efteem  of  them,  and 
for  a  fhort  Seafon  had  united  himfeif  to  this  Kind  of  People, 
and  partook,  in  fome  Refpe<5ls,  of  their  Spirit  and  Behaviour. 

But  1  proceed  to  another  Obfervation  on  the  foregoing 
Memoirs. 

II.  This  Hiftory  of  Mr.  Brainerd's  may  help  us  to  make 
I)i/iin^ions3moDg  the  high  religious  .^^^f?/^?;;;, and  remarkable 
Jrnprejfiom  made  on  the  Minds  of  Perfons,  in  a  Time  of  great 
Jivokemn^^znd  Revival  of  Religion  ;  and  may  convince  us,  that 
there  arc  not  only  Diftin6iions  in  T/^^^ry,  invented  to  fave  the 
Credit  of  pretended  Revivals  of  Religion,  and  what  is  called 
the  Experience  of  the  Operations  of  the  Spirit ;  but  Diftin6lions 
that  do  actually  take  Pla<:e'fn  the  Courfe  of  Events^  and  have  a 
real  and  evident  Foundation*in  Fa5f, 

Many  do^n^  it//7/ ooftfouri^ Things,  blend  all  together,  and 
hy^  *Tis  all  alike  5  Uii  all  ej  the  fame  Sort,     So  there  are  many 

thaf 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.  293 

that  fay  concerning  the  Religion  moft  generally  prevailing 
among  the  Separati/is^  and  the   AfFeaions  they  manifeft,  *77x 
the  Jame  that  was  all  over  the  Land /even  Yean  ago.     And  fome 
that  have  read  Mr.  -flrfi/«^r^*sJournaI,giving  an  Account  of  the 
extraordinary  Things  that  have  come  to  pafa  among  xhtlndians 
in  New-Jerfey^'hy,  'Tls  evidently  the  fame  Thing  that  appeared 
in  many  Places  among/i  /^^Englifh,  which  hat  now  proved  naughty 
and  come  to  that  which  is  worfe  than  nothing.  And  all  the  Reafon 
they  have  thus  to  determine  all  to  be  the  Jame  Wotk^  and  the 
fame  Spirit,  is,  that  the  one  manifefted  high  AfFedlions,  and  fodo 
the  other  ;  the  great  Affedlions  of  the  one  had  fome  Influence 
on  their  Bodies,  and  fo  have  the  other;    the  one  ufe  the  Terms 
CQnvi6lion^Converfion^  Humiliation, Coming  to  Chrifl ^Difcoveries^ 
Experiences,  &c.  and  fo  do  the  other  ;  the  Imprellions  on  the 
one  are  attended  with  a  great  deal  of  Zeal,  and  fo  it  is  with 
the  other  ;    the  AfFecStions  of  the  one  difpofe  'em  to  fpealc 
much  about  Things  of  Religion,  and  fo  do  the  other  ;  the  one 
delight  much  in  religious  iVIeetings,   and  fodo  the  other. — 
The  Agreement,  that  appears  inthefe,   and  fuch  like  Things^ 
make  'em  conclude,  tbatfurely  all  is  alike, all  is  the  fame  Work> 
Whereas, on  a  cloferInfpe6lion  &criticalExamination,it  would 
appear,  that  notwithftanding  an  Agreement  in  fuch  Circum- 
ftances,  yet  indeed  there  is  a  vaft  Difference,  both  in  EJJence 
and  Fruits,     A  confiderable  Part  of  the  religious  Operations, 
that  were  fix  or  fevenYears  agOjefpecially  towards  the  latierPart 
of  that  extraordinary  Seafon,  was  doubtlefs  of  the  fame  Sort 
with  the  Religion  of  theSeparatiJls  ;  but  not  all :  There  were 
many,  whofe  Experiences  were,  like  Mr.  5rj/«^rJ's,  in  a  Judg- 
ment of  Charity,    genuine  and  inconteftible. 

Not  only  do  theOppofers  of  all  Religion  confifting  in  power- 
ful Operations  and  Affections,  thus  confound  Things  ;  but 
many  of  ihtPretenden  to  fuch  Religion  do  fo.  They  that  have 
been  theSubjeds  of  fome  fort  of  vehement, but  vain  Operations 
on  their  Mind,  when  they  hear  the  Relation  of  the  Experi- 
ences of  fome  real  and  eminent  Chriftians,  they  fay,Their  Ex- 
periences are  of  the  fame  fort  :  So  they  fay,  they  are  juft  like 
the  Experiences  of  emincntChriftians  in  former  Times, which 
we  have  printed  Accounts  of.  So,  1  doubt  not,  but  there  arc 
many  deluded  People,  if  they  (hould  read  thepreceedinj»  Ac- 
countof  Mr.  Brainerd's  Life,  who  reading  without  much Un- 
derftanding,  or  careful  Obfervation,  would  (ay,  without  Hcfi- 
tation,  that  fomeThings  which  they  have  met  with,  are  of  the 
\Qry  fame  Kind  with  what  he  cxpreflcs ;  When  the  Agreement 


294  Reflexions  and  Obfervations 

is  only  in  fome  generalCircumftances,or  fomeparticularThinge 
that  are  fuperficial,  and  belonging  as  it  were  to  the  Profeffion 
and  Out-fide  o(  Religion  ;  but  the  inward  Temper  of  iVlind 
and  the  Fruits  in  Pradticc,  are  as  oppofite  and  cjiftant  as  Eaft 
and  Weft. 

Many  hom/}  good?co^\t  alfo,  and  true  Chrj/iiam^  don't  very 
well  know  how  to  make  a  Difference.     The  giiftering  Appear- 
ance and  glaring  Show   of  falfe  Religion  dazzles  their  K}es  ; 
and  they  fometimes  are    fo  deluded   by   it,  that  they  lo^  k  on 
fome  of  thefe  Impreffions,    which  H)pocrifes  tell  of,  as  the 
brighteft   Experiences.     And  tho'  ihey   have  experienced  no 
fuchThings  themfelves,they  think,  it  is  beeaufe  they  are  vaftly 
]ower  in  Attainments,  and  but  Babes,  in  Comparifon  of  thefe 
flaming  Chriftians.     Yea,  fometimes   from   their  differing  fo 
much  from  thofe  who  make  fo  great  a  Show,  they  doubt  whe- 
ther they  have  any  Grace  at  all.     And  it  is  a  hard  Thing,  to 
bring  many  well-meaning  People  to  make  proper  Diftin6tions 
in  this  Cafe  ;  and  efpecially    to  maintain   and    ftand  by  'em  ; 
through    a    certain    Weaknefs    they   unhapply    labour    of, 
whereby  they  are    liable  to  be  overcome  with  the  Glare  of 
•utward  Appearances,     Thus,  if  in  a  fedate  Hour   they  are 
by  Reafoning  brought  to  allow  fuchand  fuch  Diltindions,  yet 
the  next  Time  they  come  in  the  Way  of  the  great  Show  of  falfe 
Religion,   the  dazzling  Appearance   fwallows  them  up,  and 
they  are  carried  away.     Thus  the  Devil,    by    his    cunning 
Artifices,  eafily  dazzles  the  feeble  Sight  of  iVIen,  and  puts  'em 
beyond  a  Capacity  of  a  proper  Exercife  of  Confideration,  or 
hearkning  totheDjdUtes  of  calmThought  &  cool  Un'  erftand- 
ing.      When  they  perceive  the  great  AffecSlion,  earneft  Tajk, 
ftrong  Voice,  allured  Looks,  vaft  Confidence, and  boldAlFerti- 
ons,  of  thefe  empty  afTuming  Pretenders,    they  are  pver-born, 
Jofe  the   PofTeflion  of   their   Judgment,  and  fay,    Surely  thefe 
Men  are  in  theRight^  God  is  with  Urn  of  a  Truth  ;  andfo  they 
are  carried  away,  not  with  Light  and  Reafon,  but  (  like  Chil- 
dren) as  it  were  with  aflrong  Wind. 

This  confounding  all  Things  together,  th'at  have  a  fair  Shew, 
is  but  ading  the  Part  of  aChild,  that  going  into  a  Shop, where 
a  variety  of  Wares  are  expofed  to  Sale  (all  of  a  fhining  Ap- 
pearance ;  fomeVeflels  of  Gold  and  Silver, and  fomfeDiamonds 
and  other  precious  Ston^^  ;  and  other  Things  that  are  Toys 
of  littleValue  ;  which  arc  of  fome  bafe  Metal  giltjOrGlafs  po- 
lifhed,  2nd  painted  with  curiousColours,  or  cut  likeDiamonds) 
fhould  efteem  all  alike,  and  give  as  great  a  Pi  ice  for  the  vile  as 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs:  2^^ 

for  the  precious:  Or 'tis  like  the  Condua  of  fame  un/kilful 
rafli  Perfon,  who  finding  himfelf  deceived  by  fomc  of  the  Warci 
he  had  bought  at  that  Shop,  fhould  at  once  conclude,  all  he 
there  faw  was  of  noValue  ;  and  purfuant  to  fuch  aConclufion 
when  afterwards  he  has  true  Gold  and  Diamonds  offered  him| 
enough  to  enrich  him  and  enable  him  to  liv«  like  a  Prioce  all 
his  Days,  he  fhould  throw  it  all  into  the  Sea. 

But  we  muji  get  into  another  Way.  The  want  of  diftin- 
guiihing  in  Things  that  appertain  to  experimental  Religion,  it 
one  of  the  chief  Miferies  of  the  profcifing  World.  'Tis  at- 
tended with  very  many  mofl  difmal  Confcquenccs :  Multi- 
tudes of  Souls  are  fatally  deluded  about  thenifelves,  and  their 
own  State  ;  and  foare  eternally  undone  :  Hypocrites  are  con- 
firmed in  their  Delufions,  and  exceedingly  puffed  up  with 
Pride  :  Many  fincere  Chrifiians  are  dreadfully  perplexed, 
darkened,  tempted,  and  drawn  afide  from  the  Way  of  Duty  ; 
and  fometimes  fadly  tainted  with  falfe  Religion,  to  the  great 
Difhonour  of  Chriftianity,and  Hurt  oi  their  own  Souls  :  lome 
of  the  moft  dangerous  and  perniciousEnemies  ofReJigion  in  the 
World  (  tho'  called  bright  Chriftians  )  are  encouraged  and 
honoured  ;  who  ought  to  be  difcountenanced  and  fiiun'd  by 
every  Body  :  And  Prejudices  are  begotten  and  confirmed  in 
vaft  Multitudes,  againfl  every  Thing  wherein  the  Power  and 
EiTence  of  Godlincfs  confifts ;  and  in  theEnd  Deifm  &:Aihcifm 
are  promoted. 

III.  The  foregoing  Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd^s  Life  may 
afford  Matter  of  Conviclion,  that  there  is  indeed  fuch  aThing 
as  trne  experimtntal  Religioriy  arifing  /rom  immediate  divine 
Influences, fupernaturally  enlightning  and  convincingthcMind, 
and  powerfully  imprefBng,  quickening,  fandifying,  and  go- 
verning theHcart  ;  which  Religion  is  indeed  an  amiabieThing, 
of  happy  Tendency,  and  of  no  hurtful  Confequence  to  human 
Society  ;  notwithftanding  there  having  been  (b  many  Pretences 
and  Appearances  of  what  is  called  experimental  vital  Re- 
ligion, that  have  proved  to  be  nothing  but  vain,  pernicious 
Enthujiajm» 

\i  any  infif!:,  that  Mr.  Brainerd*s  Religio.i  was  Enihvjiafm^ 
and  nothing  butaftrange  Heat  and  blind  Fervour  of  Mind, 
arifing  from  the  ftrong  Fancies  and  Dreams  of  a  notional 
whimfical  Brain  ;  I  would  afk,  if  it  be  fo,  that  fuch  Things  as 
thefe  are  the  Fruits  of  Enthufiafm,  viz  a  prcat  Degree  ef 
Honcf^y  and  Simdlicitysfmcere  and  carneft  Defircs  and£ndea- 

Q^q  TOUIJ 


296 


Reflexions  and  Obfervations 


vours,  to  know  and  do  whatever  is  right,    and  to  avoid  every 
Thing  that  is  wrong  ;  an  high  Degree  of  Love  to  God,  De- 
light in  the  Perfedions  of  his  Nature,  placing  the  Happinefa 
of  Life  in  him  ;  not  only  in  contemplating  him,  but  in  being 
aftire  in  pleafing   and  ferving  him  ;  a  firm  and  undoubting 
Belief  in  the  Mfftah,  as  the  Saviaur  of  the  World,  the  great 
Prophet  of  God,  and  King  of  God's  Church  ;  together  with 
great  Love  to  him.  Delight  and  Complacence  in  the  Way  of 
Salvation  by  him,  and  longing  for  thcEnlargement  of  hisKing- 
dom  ;  earneft  Defires  that  God   may  be  glorified  and  the 
Jlfeffiah's  Kingdom  advanced,  whatever  Inftruments  are  made 
ufe  of ;  uncommon  Refignation  to  the  Will  of  God,  and  that 
under  vaft  Trials  ;    great  and  univerfal  Bewevolence  to  Man- 
kind, reaching  all  Sorts  of  Perfons  without  Diftindtion,  mani- 
fefted  in  Sv/eetnefs  of  Speech  and  Behaviour, kind  Treatment, 
Mercy,  Liberality,  and  earneft  feeking  the  Good  of  the  Souls, 
and  Bodies  of  Men;  attended  with  extraordinary  Humility* 
MeeknefsjForgivenefs  of  Injuries,and  Love  to  Enemies  ;  and 
a  greatAbhorrence  of  a  contrary  Spirit  andPra6lice  ;  not  only 
as  appearing  in  others,  but  whereinfoever  it  had  appeared  in 
bimfelf  ;  caufing  the  moft  bitter  Repentance,  and  Brokennefs 
of  Heart  on  Account  of  any  paft  Inftances  of  fuch  a  Condud  : 
A  modeft,  difcreet  &  decentDeportment,  among  Superiours, 
Inferiours  and  Equals ;  a  moft  diligent  Improvement  ofTime, 
and  earneft  Care   to  lofe  no  Part  of  it  ;  great  Watchfulnefs 
againft  all  Sorts  of  Sin,  of  Heart,  Speech,  andAd^ion:  And 
this   Example  and  thefe  Endeavours  attended  with  moft  happy 
Fruits,  and  blefTedEft'edls  on  others,  in  humanizing,  civilizing, 
and  wonderfully  reforming  and  transforming  fome  of  the  moft 
brutifh  Savages  ;  Idle,  Immoral,  Drunkards,  Murderers, grofs 
Idolaters,  and  Wizards  ;  bringing  them  to  permanentSobriety, 
Diligence,  Devotion, Honefty,  Confcientioufners,  andCharity  : 
And  the  foregoing  amiable  Virtues  and  fuccefsful  Labours  all 
ending  at  laft  in  a  marvellousPeace,unmoveableStability,Ca!m- 
nefi',  and  Refignation,  in  the  fenfible  Approaches  of  Death  ; 
witb  Longing  for  theHeavenlyState  ;  not  only  for  theHonourt 
and  circumftantial  Advantages  of  itjbut  above  all  for  the  moral 
Perfcilion,  and  holy  and  blefled Employments  of  it  :  And  thefe 
Things  in  a  Pcrfon   indifputably  of  good  Undeiftanding  and 
Juf^gment  :  I  fay,  if  all  thefe  Things  are  the  Fruits  of  Enihu- 
Jiaf/fiy  v/hy  VnouU  not   Enthu/icfm  be  thought  a  deferable  and 
excellent  Thing  ?  For  what  can  true  Religion,   what  can  the 
htH  Philofopby  dQ  m^je  ?    If  Vapours  and  Whimfy  will  bring 

Men 


On  the  preceeding  Memoes.  297 

Men  (0  the  moft  thorough  Virtue,  to  the  moft  benign  and 
fruitfulMorality  ;  and  will  maintain  it  through  aCourfe  ofLifc 
(attended  with  many  Trials  )  without  AfFeftation  or  Self- Ex- 
a]tation,and  with  an  earneft  conftant  bearingTeftimony  againlt 
the  Wildnefs,  the  Extravagances,  the  bitter  Zeal,  afluming 
Behaviour, &  feparating  Spirit  of  Enthufiafts ;  &  will  do  all  this 
more  efFe6tualIy,than  any  Thing  e'.fe  has  ever  done  in  any  plain 
knowa  Inftance  that  can  be  produced  ;  if  it  be  fo,  1  fay,  what 
Caufe  then  has  the  World  to  prize  and  pray  for  this  blefTcd 
Whimlicalnefs,  and  thefe  benign  Sort  of  Vapours  ? 

It  would  perhaps  be  a  Prejudice  with  fome  againft  the  whole 
of  Mr.  5rfl;ff^r^'s  Religion,  if  it  had  begun  in  the  Time  of 
the  late  religious  Commotion  ;  being  ready  to  'conclulje  (how- 
ever unreafonably  )  that  nothing  Good  could  take  it's  Rife 
from  thofe Times.  But  it  was  not  fo;  his  Converfion  was 
be/ore  thofc  Times,  in  a  Time  of  general  Deadnefs  ( as  has 
been  before  obferved  )  and  therefore  at  a  Seafon  when  it 
was  impoflible,that  he  fhoujd  receive  aTaint  from  any  corrupt 
Noiions,Examples,orCufloms,that  hadBirth  in  thofeTimes. 

And  whereas  there  arc  many  who  are  not  profcfTed  Oppofers 
of  what  is  called  experimentalReligion,v/ho  yet  doubt  of  the  Re- 
ality of  it,  from  the  had  Lives  of  fome  Pro  fe  (Tors  ;  and  are  ready 
to  determine  that  there  is  nothing  in  all  the  Talk  about  being 
horn  again y  being  emptied  of  Self^  brought  to  a  faving  Clofe  with 
Chri/i,  &c.  becaufe  many  that  pretend  to  thefe  Things,  and 
are  thought  by  others  to  have  been  the  Subjects  of  'em,maniteft 
no  abiding  Alteration  in  their  moral  Difpolition  and  Behaviour; 
are  as  carelefs,carnal,coveteous,^f.  as  ever  ;  yea,  fome  much 
worfe  than  ever  :  It  is  to  be  acknowledged  and  lamented,  that 
this  is  the  Cafe  with  fome  ;  but  by  the  prcceeding  Account 
they  may  be  fenrible,that  it  is  not  ^o  with  ajl.  There  are  fome 
indifputable  Inftanccs  of  fuch  aChange,  as  the  Scripture  fpeaks 
of  ;  an  abiding  great  Change,  a  Renovation  of  the  Spirit  of  the 
Alindy  and  ^a  Walking  in  Newne/s  of  Life.  In  the  foregoing 
Inftance  particularly,  they  may  fee  the  abiding  Influence  of 
fuch  a  Work  of  Converfion,  as  they  have  heard  cf  from  the 
Word  of  GOD  ;  the  Fruits  of  fuch  Experiences  through 
a  Courfe  of  'Years ;  under  a  great  Variety  of  Circumftances, 
many  Changes  of  State,  Place,  and  Company  ;  and  may  fee 
the  blcflcd  IfTue  and  Event  of  it  in  Life  and  Death. 

IV.  The  preceedlngHiftory  fcrves  to  confirm  thofeDo£lrjnc8 

ufually  called    the  Do^rines  of  Grace,     For  if   it  be  allowed 

(iq  2  that 


29^  Rf fleftions  mid  Obfervatlons 

that  (here  is  Truth,  Subftance,  or  Value  in  the  maio  of  Mr. 
Braintrd's  Religion,  it  will  undoubtedly  follow,that  thofe  Doc- 
trines are  divine  :  Since  'tis  evident,  that  the  whole  of  it,  from 
Beginning  to  End,  19  according  to  that  Scheme  of  Things ;  all 
built  •n  thofe  Apprehenfions,  Notions,  and  Views,  that  are 
produced  and  eftabliflicd  in  the  Mind  by  thofe  Dodlrincs,  He 
was  brought  by  Do6lrines  of  this  Kind,  to  his  Awakening,  and 
deep  Concern  about  Things  of  a  fpiritual  and  eternal  Nature  ; 
and  by  thefe  Do^rines  his  Convi^ions  were  maintained  and 
carried  on  ;  and  hisConvcrfion  was  evidently  altogether  agree- 
able to  this  Scheme,  but  by  no  Means  agreeing  with  the  con- 
trary ;  and  utterly  inconfiftent  with  the  Ar minion  Notion  of 
Converfion  or  Repentance.  HisConverfion  was  plainly  found- 
ed in  a  clear  ftrong  Con  virion,  and  undoubting  Perfwafion 
ol  the  Truth  of  th^fe  Things  appertaining  to  thefe  Do6lrines, 
which  jirminions  moil  objedi  againfl^  and  which  his  own  Mind 
ha^  contended  moft  about.  And  his  Converfion  was  no  con- 
firming and  perfeding  of  moral  Principles  and  Habits,  byUfe 
and  Practice,  and  his  own  Labour  in  an  induftrious  difciplln- 
ing  himfelf,  together  with  the  concurring  Suggeftions  and  con- 
ipiring  Aids  of  GOD's  Spirit  :  But  entirely  a  fupernatural 
Work,  at  omcc  turning  him  fromDarknefs  to  marveUousLight, 
and  from  the  Power  of  Sin  to  theDominion  of  divine  and  holy 
Principles  ;  an  EfFe<Sl,  in  no  Regard  produced  by  his  Strength 
or  Labour,  or  obtained  by  his  Vertue  ;  and  not  accompli&'d 
'till  he  was  firft  brought  to  a  full  Conviction  that  all  his  own 
Vertue,  Strength,  Labours,  and  Endeavours  could  never  avail 
any  Thing  to  the  producing  or  procuring  this  EfFe6t. 

Avery  little  while  before,  his  Mind  was  full  of  the  fame 
Cavils  againft  theDo6lrines  of  GO D's  Sovereign  Grace, which 
are  made  by  Arminians  ;  And  his  Heart  full  even  of  a  raging 
Oppofition  to  'em.'AndGOD  was  pleafed  to  perform  this  good 
Work  in  him  juft  after  a  fullEnd  had  been  put  to  this  Cavilimg 
andOppofitLon;  after  he  was  entirely  convinced,that  he  was  dead 
in  Sin,  and  was  in  ihc  Haads  of  GOD,  as  the  abfolutely  fove- 
rcipn,  unobligcd,  fple  Difpofer  and  Author  of  true  Holinefs. 
GOD's  (hewing  himMercy  at  fuch  a  Time, is  a  Confirmation, 
that  this  was  aPreparaiion  fofMercy ;  &  CGnfequentlyjthat  thefe 
Things  which  he  was  convinced  of,  were  true  :  While  he  op-^ 
pofed  thefe  Things,  he  was  the  Subject  of  no  fuch  Mercy; 
tho'  he  fo  earneflly  fought  it,  and  prayed  for  it  with  fo  much 
Painfuinefs,  Care  and  Stridlnefs  in  Religion  :  But  when  once 
Lis  OfvpofitioA  in  iu.\\y  fuj^^dued,  an^  he  js  brought  to  fubmit  tP 

the 


On  the  preceeding  Mcmolri;  2cip 

the  Truths,  which  he  before  had  oppored,with  full  Conviaion 
then  the  Mercy  he  fought  for  is  granted,  with  abundant  Lighf, 
great  Evidence  and  exceeding  Joy,  and  he  reaps  the  fwcetFruit 
of  it  all  his  Lite  after,&  in  the  Valley  of  the  Shadow  of  Death. 
In  his  Converfion,  he  was  brought  to  fee  the  Glory  of  that 
Way  of  Salvation  by  Chrifl,   that  is  taught  in  what  are  called 
the  DoSirines  of  Grace  }  and  thence-forward,  with  unfpeakable 
Joy  and  Complacence,   to  embrace  and  acquiefce  in  that  Way 
of  Salvation.     He  was  in  his  Converfion,  in  all  Refpeas,  bro't 
to  thofe  Views,  and  that  State  of  Mind,  which  thefeDoarincs 
fhew  to  be  necefTary.  And  if  his  Converfion  was  any  realCon- 
vcrfion,  or  any  Thing  befides  a  meer  Whim,  and  if  the  Reli- 
gion of  his  Life  was  any  Thing  elfe  but  a  Series  of  Freaks  of  a 
ivhimfical  Mind,  then  this  one  grand  Principle,    on  which  de- 
pends the  whole  Difference  between  Cahini/fi  and  Arminians^ 
is  undeniable,  v/z>  That  the  Grace  or  Vertue-.  of  truly  good 
Men,  not  only  differs  from  the  Vertue  of  others /« /)^^r^/,  but 
even  in  Nature  and  Kind*     If  ever  Mc.  Brainerd  was  truly 
turned  from  Sin  to  GOD  at  all,  or  ever  became  truly  Religi- 
ous, none  can  reafonably  doubt  but  that  his  Converfion  was  at 
the  Time  when  he  fuppofed   it  to  be  :  The  Change  he  thea 
experienced, was  evidently  the  greateft  moral  Change,that  ever 
he  pafs'd  under  ;  ^nd  he  was  then  apparently  firft  brought  to 
that  Kind  of  Religion,  that  remarkable  newHabit  andTemper 
of  Mind,  which  he  held  all  his  Life  after.     The  Narration 
fliews  it  to  be  different,  in  Nature  and  Kind^  from  all  that  ever 
he  was  the  Subjedi  of  before.     It  was  evidently  wrought   at 
once,  without  fitting  and  preparing  his  Mind, by  gradually  con- 
vincing it  more  and  more  of  the  fame  Truths,  and  bringing  it 
nearer  and  nearer  to  fuch  aTemper :  For  it  was  foon  after  his 
Mind  had  been  remarkably  full  of  Blafphemy,  and  a  vehement 
Exercife  of  fenfible  Enmity  againfl  God,  and  great  Oppofii ion 
to  thofe  Truths,  which  he  was  now  brought  with  his  whole 
Soul  to  embrace,  and  reft   in,  as  divine  and  glorious,   and  to 
place  hisHappinefs  in  the  Contemplation  and  Improvement  of. 
And  he  himfelf  (who  wasfurely  beft  ablctojudge)declare5,that 
the  Difpofitions  and  Affections,  which  were  then  given  him, 
and  thence-forward  maintained  in  hirn,  weremoftfenfibly  and 
certainly,   perfectly  different,   in  their  Nature^    from  aU  that 
ever  he  was  the  Subjeft  of  before,  or  that  he  ever  had  any  Con- 
ception of.  This  he  ever  ftood  to  &  was  peremptory  in  (as  what 
he  certainly  knewj  even  to  hisDeath.     He  muft  be  looked  upon 
;^3  capable  o/jjidging  i  he  had  Opportunity  to  know ;  He  had 

pradhfcd 


^oo  ReSedions  4J»J  ObfcrvatioBS 

pradifcd  a  great  deal  of  Religion  before,  was  exceeding  ftriS 
and  cocfcientious,  and  had  continued  (o  for  a  long  Time  ; 
had  various  religious  Affections,  with  which  he  often  flattered 
himfelf,  and  fometimcs  pieafed  himfelf  as  being  now  in  a  good 
Eflate:  And  after  he  had  thofe  new  Experiences,  that  began 
in  bis  ConverfioD,  they  were  continued  to  the  End  of  hisLife; 
long  enough  for  him  thoroughly  to  obferve  their  Nature,  and 
compare  'cm  with  what  had  been  before.  Doubtlefs  he  was 
(9mp«s  maitis  ;  and  was  at  leaft  one  of  fo  good  an  Underfland- 
ing  and  Judgment,  as  to  be  pretty  well  capable  of  difcerning 
and  comparing  the  Things  that  pafTed  in  his  own  Mind. 

'Tis  further  obfervable,  that  his  Religion  all  along  operated 
in  fuch  aManner  as  tended  to  confirm  hisMind  in  ftieDcctrines 
of  Gee's  abfolute  Sovereignty,  Man's  univerfal  and  intire  De- 
pcndancc  on  God's  Power  and  Grace,  i^c.  The  more  hisRe- 
iigion  prevailed  in  his  Heart,  and  the  fuller  he  was  of  di?ine 
LovCjard  of  clear  and  delightful V'iews  of  fpiritual  Things,and 
the  more  his  Heart  was  engaged  in  God*s  Service  ;  the  more 
fenfible  he  was  of  the  Certainty  and  tbeExccllency  and  Impor- 
tance of  thefe  Truths,  and  the  more  he  was  affcded  with  tbem 
and  r«joyced  in  them.  And  he  declares  particularly,  that 
when  he  lay  for  a  long  while  on  the  Verge  of  theeternalVVorld, 
6ftcn  expecting  to  be  in  thstWorld  in  a  fewMinutes,yct  at  the 
fame  Time  enjoying  gre^r  Serenity  of  Mind,  and  Ciearnefs  of 
Thcughr,  and  being  mafi  apparently  in  a  peculiar  Manner  at 
a  Diftance  from  an  enthufiaftical  Frame,  he  at  that  TimeJ^w 
dtarlj  ibeTrutbof  ibofe  great  Ds^rina  €f  theGsfpel, which  are  juft  If 
fiuti  ice  Doctrines  of  Grace,  end  never  felt  bimfeif  fo  capakU  §f 
ce^:infi  rating  tke  Truth  of  them. 

So  that  'tis  very  evident, Mr.  Braimrits  Religion  was  wholly 
cerrefpcndent  to  what  is  Cilied  the  Calvimjiical  Scheme^  and 
was  the  Effect  of  thofe  Dofirincs  applied  to  his  Heart :  And 
certainly  it  cannot  be  denied,  that  the  Effe^  was  good,  unlefs 

we  turn  Athei-ls,  or  Deifls. I  would  afi:,  whether  there 

be  any  fuch  Tiling,  in  Reality,  as  Cbriflian  Devstica  f —  If 
there  be,  what  is  it  ?  What  is  its  Nature  ?  And  what  its 
')Mi\  Mealure  ?  Should  it  not  be  in  a  great  Degree  ?  VVe  read 
ibundar.t'jy  in  Scripture,  of  hving  God  with  all  the  Hearty  with 
alttte  Siul^  with  alt  the MirJ^and  with  all  the  Strength,  of  Z)r- 
'  :^g  inGsd^  o^i  Rtjoycing  in  the  Lyrd,  Rrj cuing  with  Jef 
.zkable  ar-.d  full  of  Glory, ^he  SiuPs  Magnifying  the  Lord  ^ 
7-  -'jiir.g  fcr  G:d,  Hungring  and  ThirfUng  after  Righteoufnefs^ 
.  .  Sfj.'j  hrtrr-^.  f-.r.  ^re  L:Jig:ng  it  kaib  to  Gt^Ps  JudgmtntSy 

Preying 


On  the  pncndi^  Memoirs.  30 1' 

Praying  to  God  with\Groaningi  that  cannot  be  uttered^  Mourning 
for  Sin  with  a  broken  Heart  and  contrite  Spirit,  kc.  How  full 
is  the  Book  of    Pfalms,  and  other  Pans  of  Scripture,  of  fuch 
Things  as  theft;  !  Now  wherein  do  thefe  Things,  33  exprefs*d 
by  and  appearing  in  Mr. 5rfl/;7^r^, either  iheThings  themfelvcs 
or  their  EfFe^s  and  Fruits,  differ  from  the  Scripturc-Reprc* 
fentations  ?  Thefe  Things  he  waj  brought  to  by  that  f^range 
and  wonderful  Transformation  of  the  Man,  which  he  called 
his  CoTtverfion.  And  don't  this  well  agree  with  what  is  fo  often 
faid,  in  Old  Teflament  and  New,  concerning  the  giving  of 
a  new  Hearty  creating  a  right  Spirit,  a  being  renewed  in  the  6'p/- 
rit  of  the  Mind,  a  being  fanSiified  throughout ,   becoming  a  new 
Creature,  &c  ?   Now  where  is  there  to  be  found  an    Jrminian 
Converfion  orRepent3nce,conrifting  in  fo  great  and  admirable 
a  Change  ?  Can  [hzArminians  produce  an  Inflance,  within  this 
Age,  and  To,  plainly,  within  our  Reach  and  View,  of  fuch  a 
Reformation,  fuch  a  Transformation  of  a  Man,  to  Scriptural 
Devotion, Heavenly-Mindednefs,  and  true  Chriflian  Morality, 
in  one  that  before  lived  without  thefe  Things,  on  the  Foot  of 
//^«>Principles,and  through  the  Influence  of  thci^Dodtrines  ? 

And  here,  is  worthy  fo  be  confidered,  not  only  theEfFedt  of 
Calvini/iical  Doctrines  (  as  they  are  called  )  on  Mr.  Brainerd 
himfelf,  but  aifo  the  EfFe6l  of  the  fame  Dodtrines,  as  taught 
and  inculcated  by  him,  on  others.  'Tis  abundantly  pretended 
and  aflcrted  of  late,  that  thefe  Doctrines  tend  to  undermine 
the  very  Foundations  of  all  Religion  and  Morality,  and  to  en- 
ervate and  vacate  all  reafonaWe  Motives  to  the  Exercifs  and 
Practice  of  them,  and  lay  invincible  Stumbling-Biocks  be- 
fore 7n/i^/i,  to  hinder  their  embracing  Chri(tianity  ;  and  that 
the  contrary  Dofirines  are  the  fruitfulPrinciples  cf  Virtue  and 
Goodnefs,  fet  Religion  on  it's  right  Bafis,  reprefent  it  in  an 
amiable  Light,  fzive  it's  Motives  their  full  Force,  and  recom- 
mend it  to  the  Reafon  and  common  Senfe  of  Mankind. —  ^\it 
where  can  they  find  an  Inffance  of  (o  great  and  fignal  anEffe«St 
of  their  Dedrines,  in  bringing  Infidels,  who  were  at  fuch  a 
Diftance  from  all  that  is  Civil,  Human, Sober,  Rational,  and 
Chriftian,  and  fo  full  of  inveterate  Prejudices  againft  ihcfc 
Things,  to  fuch  a  Degree  of  Humanity,  Civility,  Exercife  of 
Reafon,  Self-denial,  and  Chrifiian  Vertue  ?  ^miniam  place 
Religion  in  Mcraliiy  :  Let  them  br-ing  an  Infhnce  of  their 
Doctrines  producing  fuch  aTransformation  of  aPcoplc  inPoint 
GfMoraliiv.  'Tis  flrangc,  if  the  Al  wife  God  fo  ordersThings 
in  his  Providence,  that  reafcuable  a/iJ  proper  Means ^  and  hit 


3©2  Reflexions  and  Obfervations 

cwn  Means, which  he  hirofelf  has  appointed,(hould  in  no  known 
remarkable  Inftance  be  inftrumental  lo  produce  fo  good  an  Ef-^ 
fc6l ;  anEffe6l  fo  agreable  to  his  own  Word  &  Mind,  and  that 
veryEfFe£l  for  which  he  appointed  thefe  cxceilentMeans  ;  that 
'  they  fhould  not  be  foSuccefsfuI^as  thofeMeans  which  are  nathis 
own,  but  very  contrary  to  'eai>  and  of  a  contrary  Tendency  ; 
Means  that  are  in  themfelves  very  abfurd,  and  tend  to  root  all 
Religion  and  Vertue  out  of  the  World,  to  promote  and  cfta- 
blifli  Infidelity,and  to  lay  an  infuperable  Stumbling- Biock  be- 
fore Fagam,  to  hinder  their  embracing  the  Gofpel :  I  fay,  if 
this  be  the  true  State  of  the  Cafe,  'tis  certainly  pretty  won- 
derful, and  an  Event  worthy  of  fome  Attention. 

1  know,  that  many  will  be  ready  to  fay,  Jt  is  too /eon  fety  to 
glory  in  tbelVork^ihat  has  hmivro't  among  Mr, BrsLinerd'sInc^iansi 
^Tiybeft  to  wait  and  Jee  the  final  Event  \  Jtmay  be^  all  will  come 
U  nothing  by  and  by  ;  To  which  I  anfwer  ( not  to  infift,  that  it 
will  not  follow,  according  to  Jrminian  Principles,  they  are  not 
nowtrueChriftians,realIypious&  godly, the'  ihey  /hould i2\hw2iy 
and  come  to  nothing)  that  I  never  fuppofed,  every  one  of  thofc 
Ja^;j»/,whoinProfcflion  renounced  their  Heathenifm  $c  vifibly 
embraced  Chriftianity,  and  have  had  fome  Appearance  of 
Piety,  will  finally  prove  true  Converts  :  If  two  thirds,  or  in- 
deed one  half  of  'em  (  as  great  a  Proportion  as  there  is  in  the 
Parable  of  the  Ten  Virgins)  fhould  perfevere  ;  it  will  be  fuffici- 
cnt  to  (hew  the  Work,  wrought  among  them,  to  have  been 
truly  admirable  and  glorious.  But  fo  much  of  Permanence  of 
their  Religion  has  already  appeared,  as  Ihewsit  to  be  fomething 
elfe  befides  an  Indian  Humour  or  good  Mood,  or  any  tranfient 
EfFeft  in  the  Conceits, Notions,  and  AfFe6lions  of  thefe  igno- 
rant People,  excited  at  a  particular  Turn,  by  artful  Manage- 
ment. For  'tis  now  more  than  three  Tears  ago, that  this  Work 
began  among  them, and  a  remarkableChange  appear'd  in  many 
of  them  ;  fmce  which  Time  the  Number  of  vifible  Converts 
has  greatly  increafed  :  And  by  repeated  Accounts,  from  feve- 
ral  Hands,  they  ftill  generally  perfevere  in  diligent  Religion  and 
flriil  Vertue.  I  think  worthy  to  be  here  inferted,  a  Letter  from 
a  young  Gentleman, a  Candidate  for  the  Miniftry,  one  of  thofe 
before  mentioned,  appointed  by  the  honourable  Commiflioners 
InSqfionyZS  MiiTionaries  to  theHeathen  of  the  Six  Nations^  fo 
called  ;  who,  by  their  Order,  dwelt  with  Mr.  John  Srainerd, 
among  thefe  Chriftian  Indians^  in  order  to  their  being  prepared 
for  the  Bufinefs  of  their  Miffion.  The  Letter  wa$  written 
from  then^Cjio  his  Parents  here  in  Nortjfempton^k  is  as  follows. 

'         '  Bsthek 


On  the  preaedifi^  Memoirs; 


S€>^ 


Bethih  m  New-Jerfey,  Jan.  14.  1747,$. 
Honoured  and  dear  Parents, 

<«  AFteralong  and  unccmfortable  Journey,  by  Reafon  of 
^A  ««  bad  Weather,  I  arrived  at  Mr.  ^ro/'n/r^'s,  the  6th 
«<  of  this  Inftant;  where  I  defign  to  ftay  this  Winter  :  And 
<«  asyet,  upon  many  Accounts,  am  well  fatisfied  with  my 
*«  coming  hither.  The  State  and  Circumftances  of  the  7/i- 
<'  dians^  fpiritual  and  temporal,much  exceed  what  I  expedlerf, 
<^  I  have  endeavoured  to  acquaint  my  felf  with  the  State  of 
*«  the  Indians  in  genera],  with  particular  Pcrfons,  and  with 
*«  the  School;  as  much  as  the  fhort  Time  I  have  been  hero 
««  would  admit  of.  And  noiwithftanding  my  Expedationa 
««  were  very  much  raifed,  from  Mr.  David  Brainerd's  Jour- 
«^  nal,  and  from  particular  Informations  from  him;  yet  I 
<«  muft  confefs,  that  in  many  Refpeds,  they  are  not  equal  to 
«<  that  which  now  appears  to  me  to  be  true,  concerning  the 
»«  glorious  Work  of  divine  Grace  arnongft  the  Indians, 

«*  The  Evening  after  I  came  to  Town,  I  had  Opportunify 
««  to  fee  the  Indians  together,  whilft  the  Rev.  Mr.  Arthur 
*«  preach'd  to  them  :  At  which  Time  there  appeared  a  wtr^ 
<«  general  and  uncommon  Serioufnefs  and  Solemnity  in  the 
««  Congregation  :  And  this  appear'd  to  me  to  be  the  EfFedt 
<c  of  an  inward  Senfe  of  the  Importance  of  divine  Truihj, 
<<  and  not  becaufe  they  were  hearing  a  Stranger  :  Which  was 
««  abundantly  confirmed  to  me  the  next  Sabbath,  when  there 
<<  was  the  fame  devout  Attendance  on  divine  Service,  and  a 
*«  furprizing  Solemnity  appearing  in  the  Performance  of  each 
<c  Part  of  divine  Worfhip.  And  fome,  who  are  hopefully  true 
««  Chriftiansjappear  to  have  been  atthatTime  much  cnliven'd 
*«  and  comforted  j  not  from  any  obfervableCommotions  then, 
<«  but  from  Converfation  afterwards:  And  others  fecm'd  ta 
««  be  under  preffing  Concern  for  their  Souls.  I  have  cndea- 
««  voured  to  acquaint  my  felf  with  particular  Perfons ;  many 
«'  of  whom  feem  to  be  very  humble  and  growing  Chriftians  ; 
*'  altho'  fome  of  them  (  as  I  am  informed)  were  before  their 
<«  Converfion  moft  monftroufly  Wicked. 

*'  Religious  Converfation  feems  to  be  very  pleafing  and 
<«  delightful  to  many,  and  efpecially  that  which  relates  to 
<«  the  Exercifes  of  the  Heart.  And  many  here  don*t  fecni 
*«  to  be  real  Chriftians  only,  but  growing  Chriftians  alfo  ; 
«'  as  well  in  do<3rinal,  as  experimental  Knowledge.  Bcfidofi 
'«  myConverfation  with  particularPcrfons,!  have  badOppor- 
^'  tunity  to  attend  upon  one  of  Mfi  Brmnd'%  catechetical 
"  R  r  l^^witn 


oo^  Reflexions  and  Obfervations 

*«  Leisures ;   where  I  was  furprized  at  their   Readlnefs  in 
<'  anfwering  Queftions  which  they  had  not  been  ufed  to  : 
««  Altho'  Mr. i^mwgr(i  complained  much  of  their  uncommon 
<«  Deficiency,     it  is  furprizing,   to  fee  this  People,  who  not 
««  long  fince  were  led  Captive  by  Satan  at  his  Will,  and  liv- 
<«  ing  in  the  Practice  of  all  manner  of  Abominations,  with- 
<«  out  the  leaft  Senfe  even  of  moral  Honefty,  yet  now  living 
•«  foberiy  and  regularly,  and  not  feeking  every  Man  his  own, 
«<  but  every  Man,  in  fome  Senfe,  his  Neighbour's  Good  ; 
««  and  to  fee  ibofe,  who  but  a  little  while  paft,  knew  nothing 
^  of  the  true  GOD,  now  worfhipping  Him  in  a  folemn  and 
<«  devout  Manner  5  not  only  in  publick,    but  in  their  Fami- 
<«  lies  and  in  Secret ;   which  is  manifeftly  the  Cafe  ;  it  being 
*«  a  difficuli:  Thing  to  walk  out  in  the  Woods  in  theMorn- 
<«  ing,  without  difturbing  Perfons  at  their  fecret  Devotion. 
«'  And  it  feems  v/onderful,  that  this  fhould  be  the  Cafe,  not 
<«  only  with  adult  Perfons,  but  with  Children  alfo.     It  is  ob- 
««  fervabic  here,  that  many  Children  (  if  not   the  Children 
<<  in  general)  retire  into  fecret  Places  to  pray.     And,  as  far 
««  as  at  prefent  i  can  judge,  this  is  not  the  EfFeft  of  Cuflom 
*«  and  Fafhion,   but  of  real  Serioufnefs  and  Thoughtfulnefs 
<*  about  their  Souls. 

"  1  have  frequently  gone  into  the  School^  and  have  fpcnt 
<<  confiderabie  Time  there  amongft  the  Children  ;  and  have 
««  been  furprized  to  fee,  not  only  their  diligent  Attendance 
««  upon  theBufmefsof  theSchool,butalfo  the  Proficiency  they 
««  have  made  in  it,  in  Reading  and  Writing,  and  in  their  Ca- 
♦^  techifms  of  divers  Sorts.     It  feems  to  be  as  pleafing  and  as 
<<  natural  to  thefe  Children, to  have  their  Books  in  theirFIands, 
*«  as  ii  does  for  many  ethers  to  be  at  Play.     I  have  gone  into 
«'  an  Houfe  where  there  has  been  a  Number  of  Children  ^c- 
<«  cidentaily  gathered  together  ;  and  obferved,  that  every  one 
«'  had  his  Book  in  his  Hand,  and  was  diligently  ftudying  of 
.<«  it.     There  is  to  the  Number  of  about  thirty  of  shefs  Chil- 
<«  drcp,  who  csn  anfwer  to  all  the  Qiieflipns  in  the  JJfemr 
««  lihf'i^  Cafcchifm  \  and  the  bigger  Part  of  them  are  able  to  do 
*'  it  with  thePro^y^jr,  to  the  fourth  Commandnicnt.      I  v;ifh 
«'  there  were  many  fueh  Schools  :  I  confefs,  that  I  never  was 
*'  acquainted  with  fuch  an  one,  in  many  Refpc6!s.     Oh  that 
"•  what  God  has  done  here,  may  prove  to  be  the  Beginning 
'•  cifa  hx  more  glorious  and  cxtenfive  Work  of  Grace  among 
<<  the  Heathen.  I  am  your  cbsdicniand  dutiful  Son, 

Job  Strong, 
«  P.S.  Since 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.  305 

<c  P,  S.  Since  the  Date  of  this,  I  have  had  Opportunity  to 
<«  attend  upon  another  oiMr. Brainerd's  caiechcticalLedlures: 
<«  and  truly  I  was- convinced,  that  Mr.  Braim^rd &id  not ccni" 
«  plain  before  of  his  People's  Defedls  in  anfwering  toQuefti- 
«  ons  propofed,  without  Rcafon  :  For  altho'  iheir  An/wen 
"  at  that  Time  exceeded  my  Expectations  very  much  ;  yet 
««  their  Performances  at   this  Lecture  very  much  exce'edcd 

Since  this,  we  have  had  Accounts  from  Time  to  T  me,and 
fome  very  late,  which  (hew  that  Religion  ftill  continues  in 
profperous  and  moft  defirable  Circumftances  among  thefc 
Indians, 

V.  Is  there  not  much  in  the  preceedingMemoirs  ofMr/Src/- 
nerdio  teach, and  excite  toDuty,U9  who  are  called  to  the  Work 
of  th^Mini/iry^  and  all  that  siteCandidates  for  thatgreatWcrk? 
What  a  deep  Senfe  did  he  feem  to  have  of  the  Greatnefs  and 
Importance  of  that  Work,  and  with  what  Weight  did  it  lie 
on  his  Mind  !  How  fenfible  was  he  of  his  own  lafufficiency 
for  this  Work  ;  and  how  great  was  his  Dependance  on  God's 
Sufficiency  I  How  folicitous,  that  he  might  be  fitted  for  it  ! 
And  to  this  End,  how  much  Time  did  he  fpend  in  Prayer  and 
Fafting,  as  well  as  Reading  and  Meditation  ;  giving  himjdf 
to  thefe  Things  !  How  did  he  dedicate  his  whole  Life,  all  his 
Powers  and  Talents  to  God  ;  and  forfake  and  renounce  the 
World,  with  all  it's  pleafing  and  enfnaring  Enjoyments,  that 
he  might  be  wholly  at  Liberty,  to  ferve  Chrift  in  this  Work  ; 
and  to  pleafe  him  who  had  chofen  him  to  be  a  Soldier^  under  -the 
Captain  of  our  Salvation  !  With  what  Solicitude,  Solemnity, 
and  Diligence  did  he  devote  himfelf  to  God  our  Saviour,  and 
feek  his  Prefence  and  Blefling  in  fecret,  at  the  Time  of  his 
Ordination  !  And  how  did  his  whole  Heart  appear  to  be  con- 
ftantly  engaged,  his  whole  Time  employed,  and  his  whole 
Strength  fpent  in  the  Bufinefs  he  then  folemnly  undertook  and 

was  publickly  fet  apart  to  I And  his  Hiftory  fliews  us  the 

right  Way  to  Succefs  in  the  Work  of  the  Miniftry.  He  fought 
it,  as  a  refolute  Soldier  feeks  Vidory,  in  a  Siege  or  Battle  j  or 
as  a  Man  that  runs  a  Race,  for  a  great  Prize.  Animated  with 
Love  to  Chrift  and  Souls,  how  did  he  labour  always  fervently  ^ 
not  only  in  Word  and  Dodtrine,  in  publick  and  private,  but 
\n  Prayers  Day  and  Night,  wrejlling  with  God  in  fecret,  and 
travailing  in  Birth,  with  unutterable  Groans  and  Agonies,  ««- 
til  Chri/i  wtre  formed  in  the  Hearts  of  the  People  to 
R  r  2  whonj 


^5 


Reflcftions  and  Obfervatiohs 


whom  he  was  fent  !  How  did  he  thirft  for  a  Bleffing  on  his 
Miniftry ;  and  watch  for  Souls,  as  one  that  muft  give  Account  / 
How  did  Yitgo  forth  in  the  Strength  of  the  Lord  God-,  feeking 
and  depending  on  a  fpecial  Influence  of  the  Spirit  to  aflift  and 
fuccccd  him  !  And  what  was  the  happy  Fruit  at  laft,  though 
after  long  waiting,  and  many  dark  and  difcouraging  Appear- 
ances I  Like  a  true  Son  of  Jacob,  he  perfevered  in  wrefth'ng» 
through  all  theDarknefs  of  theNight,  until  the  breaking  of  tha 
Day. 

And  his  Example  of  labouring, praying^denying  himfelf,and 
enduring  Hardnefs,  with  unfalnting  Refolution  and  Patience,* 
and  his  faithful,  vigilentjand  prudent  Conduft  in  many  other 
Refpedls  (which  it  would  be  too  long  now  particularly  to  re- 
cite )  may  afford  Inftru61ion  to  Mifftonaries  in  particular. 

VI.  The  foregoing  Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd*s  Life  may 
afford  Inftruftion  to  Chriftians  in  general;  as  it  fhews,in  many 
Rcfpe<^s,  the  right  Way  of  praSiifing  Religion,  in  order  to 
obtaining  the  Ends  of  it,  and  receiving  the  Benefits  of  it ;  or 
how  Chriflians  (hould  run  the  Race,  Jet  before  them,  if  they 
would  not  run  in  vain^  or  run  as  uncertainly,  but  would  ho- 
nour God  in  the  World,  adorn  their  Profeffion,  be  Service- 
able to  Mankind,  have  the  Comforts  of  Religion  while  the/ 
live,  be  free  from  difquieting  Doubts  and  dark  Apprehenfions 
about  the  State  of  their  Souls ;   enjoy  Peace  in  the  Approaches 

of  Death,  and  finifh  their  Courfe  with  Jop In  general,  he 

much  recommended,  for  this  Purpofe,  the  Redemption  of  Time ^ 
great  Diligence  in  the  Bufinefs  of  the  Chriflian  Life,  Watchful'- 
T^efs^  he.  And  he  very  remarkably  exemplify'd  thefeThings, 

But  particularly,  his  Example  and  Succcfs  with  Regard  to 
one  Duty  in  fpecial,  may  be  of  great  Ufe  to  bothMinifters  and 
private  Chriftians  5  I  mean,  the  Duty  o(  fecret Fa/ling,  The 
Reader  has  feen,  how  much  Mr.  Brainerd  recomrnends  this 
Duty,  and  how  frequently  he  exercifed  himfelf  in  it ;  Nor 
can  it  well  have  efcap'd  Obfervation,how  much  he  wasown'd 
and  blefs'd  in  it,  and  of  what  great  Benefit  it  evidently  was  to 
bis  Soul.  Among  all  the  many  Days  he  fpent  in  fecretFafling 
and  Prayer,  that  he  gives  an  Account  of  in  his  Diary,  there  is 
(carce  an  Inftance  of  one, but  what  was  either  attended  or  foon 
followed  with  apparent  Succcfs,  and  a  remarkable  Bleffing^ 
in  fpecial   Incomes  and  Confolations   of  God's  Spirit  ;  and 

very  often,  before  the  D^y  was  ended.- But  it  muft  be 

pbfef  v£d,  that  when  he  fee  aboi^t  this  Duty,  he  did  it  in  good 

Earneftj 


C»  the  pnceeding  Memoirs.  ^or 

Earncft ;  ^irrhg  up  hlmfelfu  take  hold  o/GodyZnd  coni'mulnz 
injiant  in  Proyery  with  much  of  the  Spirit  of  Jacob,  v^ho 
ikid  to  the  Angel,    1  will  not  }et  the  go^  txcept  thou  blefs  me. 

VII.  There  is  much  in  the  preceding  Account  to  excite 
.  and  encourage  God's  People  to  carneft  Prayers  and  Endea- 
vours for  the  Mvancemtnt  and  Enlargement  of  the  K'n^dom  of 
Chuist  in  the  IVorld,  Mr.  Brainerdfat  us  an  excellent  Ex- 
ample in  this  Refpedl :  He  fought  the  Profperity  of  Zion  with 
all  his  iMight  :  He  prefer'd  Jerufahm  above  his  chief  Joy. 
\iov7  did  his  Soul  long  for  it,  and  pant  after  it  !  And  how 
earneftlv  and  often  did  he  wreftle  with  God  for  it  !  And  how 
far  did  he,  in  thefe  Defircs  and  Prayers,  feem  to  be  carried 
beyond  all  private  and  felfifh  Views  !  being  animated  by  a 
pure  Love  to  Chrift,  an  earneft  Defire  of  his  Glory,  and  a 
difinterefted  AfFe£lion  to  the  Souls  of  Mankmd. 

The  Cenfideration  of  this,  not  only  oughc  to  be  an  Incitement 
to  the  People  of  God,  but  may  alfo  be  a  juft  Encouragement  to 
*cm,     to  be  much  in  feeking  and  praying  for  a  general  Out- 
pouring of  the  ^p\r\t  of  God, and  extenfive  Revival  ofRcligion. 
I  confefs,  that  God's  giving  fo  much  of  a  Spirit  cf  Prayer  for 
this  Mercy  to  fo  eminent  a  Servant  of  his,  and  exciting  him,  in 
fo  extraordinary  a  Manner,  and  with  fuch  vehement  Thirftings 
of  Soul,  to  agonize  in  Prayer  for  it,  fromTime  to  Tjme.jthro* 
the  Courfe  of  his  Life,  is  one  Thing,  among  other?,  which 
gives  me  great  Hope,  that  God  has  a  Defign  of  accomplifhing 
fomething  very  glorious  for  the  Intereft  of  his  Church  before 
long.     One  fuch  Inflance  as  this,  I  conceive,  gives  more  En- 
couragement,   than   the  common,  cold,    formal  Prayers  of 
Thoufands.     As  Mr.  Brainerd's  Defires  and  Pravers  for   the 
coming  ofChrift'sKingdom,  were  vtry  /pecial and  extraordinary; 
fo,  I  think,  v/e  may  reafonably  hope,   that  the  God,  who  ex- 
cited thofe  Defires  and  Prayers,  will  anfwer  them  with  fome- 
thing y^^aa/ and  extraordinary.     And  in  a  particular  Manner, 
do  I  think  it  worthy  to  be  takenNotice  of  for  ourEncouragmenr, 
that  he  had  his  Heart  (as  he  declared  )  unufually,    and  beyond 
what  had  been  before,  drawn  out   in  Longirgs  and  Prayers  for 
theFlourifhing  of  Chrift's  Kingdom  on  Earth,  when  he  was  in 
the  Approaches  of  Death  ;  and  that  with  his  d)ing  Breath  he 
did  as  it  were  breathe  out  his  departing  Soul  into  the  Bofom  of 
hisRedeemer,  in  Prayers  andPantings  after  this  gloriousEvent; 
expiringin  a  very  greatHopethat  it  would  foon  begin  to  be  ful- 
/i'ed.   And  1  wifh,  that  the  Tho'ts  which  he  in  h:s  dying  State 

exprcffci 


^oS  Refledions  and  Obfcrvatloiis 

cxpreficd  of  that  explicitAgreementjand  vifibleUnion  of  God's 
People,  in  extraordinary  Prayer  for  a  general  Revival  of  Reli- 
gion, lately  propofed  in  a  Memorial  from  Scotland^  which  has 
been  difperfed  among  us,  maj/  be  well  confidered  by  thofethat 

hitherto  have  notfeen  fit  to  /all  in  with  that  Propofal. But 

I  forbear  to  fay  any  more  on  this  Head,  having  already  largely 
publifhed  my  Thoughts  upon  it,  in  aDifcourfe  written  onPur- 
pofe  to  promote  that  Affair  ;  which,  Iconfefs,!  wifh  that  every 
one  of  myReadersmight  be  fupplied  with ;  not  that  my  Honour, 
but  that  this  excellent  Defign  might  be  promoted. 

As  there  is  much  in  Mr.  Brainerd^s  Life  to  encourage  Chri- 
ftians  to  feek  the  Advancement  of  ChrifPs  Kingdom,  in  gene- 
ral ;  fo  there  is,  in  particular, to  pray  for  the  Converlion  oMhe 
Indians  on  this  Continent,  and  to  exert  themfelves  in  the  Ufe 
of  proper  Means  for  it's  Accomplifhment.  For  it  appears, 
that  he  in  his  unutterable  Longings  and  Wreftlings  of  Soul  for 
the  Flourlfhing  of  Religion,  had  his  Mind  peculiarly  intent  on 
tl-e  Convcrfion  and  Salvation  of  thefe  People,  and  his  Heart 
moreefpecially  engaged  in  Prayer  for  them.  And  if  we  confi- 
der  the  Degree  and  Manner  in  which  he  from  Time  toTime, 
fought  and  hoped  for  an  extenfiveWork  of  Grace  among  them, 
I  think,  we  have  Reafon  to  hope,  that  the  wonderful  Things, 
wbichGod  wrought  among  them  by  him, are  but  aFore-runner 
of  fomething  yet  much  more  glorious  and  extenfivc  of  that 
Kind  ;  and  this  rnay  juftly  be  an  Encouragement,  to  well- 
difpcfed  charitable  Perfons,  to  honour  the  Lord  with  thsir  Sub- 
fiance^  by  contributing,  as  they  are  able,  to  promote  the  fpread- 
inc  of  theGofpel  among  them  ;  and  this  alfo  may  incite  and  en- 
courage Gentlemen  who  are  incorporated,  and  intrufted  with 
the  Care  and  Difpofal  of  thofe  liberal  Benefa6lions,  which  have 
already  been  made  by  piousPerfons,  to  that  End  ;  andlikewife 
the  Mifiionaries  themfelves,  that  are  or  may  be  employed  ;  and 
it  may  be  of  Diredion  unto  both, as  to  the  properQualifications 
of  MifTicnarics,  and  the  proper  Meafures  to  be  taken  in  order 
to  their  Succefs. 

One  Thing  in  particular,  I  would  take  Occafion  from  the 
foregoing  Hiftory  to  mention  and  propofe  to  the  Confideration 
of  fuch  as  have  the  Care  of  providing  and  fending  Ji^iJJionaries 
amongSavages ;  uiz.  Whether  it  would  not  ordinarily  be  befl 
to  ftnd  two  together  ?  It  is  pretty  manifeft,  that  Mr.  Brainerd's 
going,  as  he  did,  alone  into  the  howling  Wildernefs,  was  one 
great  Occafion  of  fuch  a  prevailing  of  Melancholy  on  hisMind; 
which  was  his  greateft  D:fadvantage.     He  was  much  in  fpeak- 

M 


On  the  preceedifjg  Memo'rrs.  309 

ing  of  it  himfelf,  when  he  was  here  in  his  dyingState  ;  and  ex- 
pre/Ted  himfelf,  to  this  Purpofe,  that  none  could  conceive  of 
the  Difadvantage  3  Miffionary  in  fuch  Circumftances  was  un- 
der, by  being  alone  ;  efpecialJy  as  it  expofed  him  to  Difcou- 
ragement  and  Melancholy  :  And  fpokeof  thcWifdoin  ofChrift 
in  fending  forth  his  Difciples  by  Two  and  Two  ;  and  left  it 
as  his  dying  Ad  vice  to  his  Brother,  never  to  go  to  Sufquahannah, 
to  travel  about  in  that  remote  Wildernefs,  to  preach  to  the 
Indians  there,  as  he  had  often  done,  without  the  Company  of  a 
Fellow  -  A/liJfionary . 

VIII.  One  Thing  more  may  not  be  unprofitably  obfervcd 
in  the  preceeding  Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd ;  and  that  is  the 
fpecial  and  remarkable  Difpojal  of  divine  Providence,  with  Re- 
gard to  the  Circum/fances  of  his  laft  Skknefi  and  Death, 

Tho'  he  had  been  long  infirm,  his  Conftitution  being  much 
broken  by  his  Fatigues  and  Hardfliips  ;  and  tho'  he  was  often 
brought  very  low  by  lllncfs,  be'^ore  he  left  Kaunaumeek,  and 
alfo  while  he  lived  at  the  Fsrks  of  Delaware  :  Yet  his  Life 
was  preferved,  'till  he  had  feen  that  which  he  had  Co  long 
and  greatly  defircd  and  fought,  a  glorious  Work  of  Grace 
among  the  hdians,  and  had  received  the  wifhed  for  Bleflingof 
(jod  on  his  Labours.  Tho*  as  it  were  in  Deaths  cft^  yet  he 
lived  to  behold  the  happy  Fruits  of  the  long  continued  Travail 
of  his  Soul  and  Labour  of  his  Body,  in  the  wonderful  Conver- 
fion  of  many  of  the  Heathen,  and  the  happy  Y.?it€i.  of  it  in  the 
great  Change  of  their  Convcrfation,  with  manyCircumftances 
which  afforded  a  fair  Profpe6t  of  the  Continuance  of  God's 
Bleffing  upon  them  ;  as  may  appear  by  what  I  fhall  prcfently 

further  obferve Thus   he  did  not  depart,  'till  his  £)is 

had  feen  God's  Salvation, 

Tho*  it  was  the  Pieafureof  God,  that  he  fliould  betaken 
clFfrom  his  Labours  among  that  People  whbm  God  had  made 
him  a  fpjriiual  Father  to,  who  were  (0  dear  to  him, and  whofe 
fpiritual  Welfare  he  was  fo  greatlvconcerned  for  ;  yet  this  wai 
not  before  they  were  well  initiated  and  initrudled  in  the  Chr il- 
tian  Relijrion,  thoroughly  wei^ned  from  their  old  heathenilh 
and  brutifb  Notions  and  Pracf^ices,  and  all  'heir  Prejudices  and 
Jealoufies,  which  tended  to  keep  their  Minds  unfeitled,  were 
fully  removed  ;  and  they  were  confirmed  and  fixed  in  the 
ChriftianFaiih  and  Manners,  were  formed  into  a  Church,  had 
ecclefiafticalOrdinanccs  and  Difciplinc  introduced  h  fettled  ; 
were  brought  into  a  good  Way  with  Rtfpedt  to  the  Education 
of  Children,  h«d  a  School- Mallw  fcni  to'  them  ia  Providence, 

c^ccilcfitly 


'5I*  Reflexions  and  Obfervatiofjs 

excellently  qualified  for  the  Bufincfs,  and  had  a  Scijool  ki  up 
and  eftabljfhed,  in  good  Order,  among  them  ;  had  been  well 
brought  ofF  from  their  former  Idle,  ftrolling,  fottiih  Way  of 
Living ;  had  removed  from  their  former  fcattered  uncertain 
Habitations ;  and  were  colledled  in  aTown  by  themfelves,  on 
a  good  Piece  of  Land  of  their  own  ;  were  introduced  into  thej, 
Way  of  living  by  Hufbandry,  and  begun  to  experience  the 
Benefits  of  it,  b'r.  Thefe  Things  were  but  jufl  brought  to 
pafs  by  his  indefatigable  Application  and  Gare,an<i  then  he  was 
taken  ofF from  his  Work  by  liinefs.  If  this  had  been  but  a 
lictle  fooner,  they  would  by  no  Means  have  been  fo  well  pre- 
pared for  fuch  aDifpenfation  ;  and  it  probably  would  have  been 
unfpeakably  more  to  the  Hurt  of  their  fpiritual  Intereft,  aijd  of 
the  Caufe  of  Chrif^ianity  among  them. 

The  Time  and    Circumftances  of  his    Illnefs  were  fo  or- 
dered, that  he  had  juft  Opportunity  to  finifh  his  Journal^  and 
prepare  it  for  the  Prcfs ;   giving  an  Account  of  the  marvellous 
Display  of  divine  Power  and  Grace  among  the7»^/fl»;  in  NeW' 
'^erfey^  and  at  the  Forh  of  Delaware :  His  doing  which  was  a 
Thing  of  great  Confequence,  and  therefore  urged  upon  him 
by  the  Correfpondents^  who  have  honoured  his  Journal  with  a 
Preface.     The  World  being  particularly  and  juflly  informed 
of  that  Affair  by  Mr.  Brainerdy  before  hisDeath,  a  Foundation 
was  hereby  laid  for  a  Concern   in  others  for  that  Caufe,  and 
proper  Care  and  Meafures  to  be  taken  for  the  maintaining  it 
after  his  Death.     As  it  has  actually  proved  to  be  of  greatlnflu- 
cnce  andBenefit  in  thisRefpe6t ;  it  having  excited  and  engaged 
many  in  thofe  Parts,  and  alfo  more  diliant  Parts  of  Jmerica^  to 
exert  themfelves  for  the  upholding  and  promoting  fo  good  and 
glorious  a  Work,  remarkably  opening  their  Hearts  and  Hands 
to  that  End  :   And  not  only  in  America^  but  in  Great  Sritairig 
where  that  Journal  ( which  is  the  fame  that  I  have  earnefily  re- 
commended  to  my   Readers    to  pofTefs  themfelves  of)  has 
been  an  Occafion  of  feme  large  Benefadlions,  made  for  the 
promoting  the  Intereft  ofChriftianity  among  the  Indians,  ——If 
Mr.  Srainerdhzd  been  taken  111  but  a  little  fooner,  he  had  not 
been  able  to  compleat  this  his  Journal,  and  prepare  a  Copy  for 
the  Prefs. 

He  was  not  taken  cfFfrom  the  Workof  theMinif!ry  among 
his  People,  'till  his  Brother  was  in  a  Capacity  and  Circum- 
ftanccs  to  fucceed  him  in  hisCare  of  them  :  Who  fucceeds  him 
in  the  like  Spirit,  and  under  whofe  prudent  and  faithful  Care 
his  Congregation  ha«  flgurilhed,  and  been  very  h^ppyj  fincehc 
^       -        '  ~  J;ft 


On  the  freceeding  Memoirs.  «  ,  t 

left  them  ;  and  probably  could  not  have  been  fo  well  provided 
for,  other  wife.  If  Mr.  Brainerd  h^d  been  difabled  fooner,  his 
Brother  would  by  no  Means  have  been  ready  to  ftand  up  in' his 
Place  5  having  taken  his  firft  Degree  at  College  but  about 
that  very  Time  that  he  was  feiz'J  with  his  fatal  Confump- 
tion.  ^ 

Tho'  in  that  Winter  that  he  lay  fick  at  Mr.  Dickinfon's  in 
Eltfabeth'Town^  he  continued  for  a  long  Time  in  an  extremely 
low  State,  fo  that  his  Life  was  almoft  dcfpair'd  of,  and  his 
State  was  fometimes  fuch  that  it  was  hardly  expedled  he  would 
live  a  Day  to  an  End  5  yet  his  Life  was  fpared  a  while  longer  ; 
he  lived  to  fee  his  Brother  arrived  in  JSJew-Jerfey^  being  come 
tofucceed  him  in  theCare  of  his  Indians  ;  and  he  himfelf  had 
Opportunity  to  affift  in  his  Examination  and  Introdudion  into 
hisBufinefsj  and  to  commit  the  Conduct  of  his  dear  People 
to  One  whom  he  well  knew,  and  could  put  Confidence  in  and 
ufe  Freedom  with  in  giving  him  particular  Inftru^ions  and 
Charges,  and  under  whofe  Care  he  could  leave  his  Congrega- 
tion with  great  Chearfulnefs. 

The  Providence  of  God  was  remarkable  in  fo  ordering  of 
it,  that  before  his  Death  he  (hould  take  a  Journey  into  New- 
Eng/andyZnd  go  to  BoJ?on  :  Which  was,  in  many  Refpe(5ls,  of 
very  great  and  happy  Confequence  to  the  Intereft  of  Religion, 
and  efpecially  among  his  own  People.  By  this  Means,  as 
has  been  obfervcd,  he  was  brought  into  Acquaintance  with 
many  Perfons  of  Note  and  Influence,  Minifters  and  others, 
belonging  both  to  the  Town  and  various  Parts  of  the  Coun- 
try ;  andhad'Opportunity,  under  the  beft  Advantages,  to  bear 
a  Teftimony  for  God  and  true  Religion,  and  againft  thofe  faife 
Appearances  of  it  that  have  proved  mofl  pernicious  to  the 
Interefts  of  Chrifl's  Kingdom  in  the  Land.  And  the  Provi- 
dence of  God  is  particularly  obfervable  in  this  Circumftance 
of  the  Teftimony  he  there  bore  for  true  Religion  ;  viz.  That 
he  there  was  brought  (o  near  the  Grave^  and  continued  for  fo 
long  a  Time  on  the  very  Brink  of  Eternity  ;  and  from  Time 
to  Time,  look'd  on  himfelf,  and  was  looked  on  by  others,  as 
juft  leaving  the  World  ;  and  that  in  thefe  Circumftances 
he  (hould  be  (o  particularly  directed  and  affifted  in  his  Tbo'fs 
and  Views  of  Religion,  to  diftinguifh  between  the  true  and 
the  falfe,  with  fuch  Clearnefs  and  Evidence  ;  and  that  after 
this  he  (hould  be  unexpe6tedly  and  furprizingly  reftored  and 
ftrengthned,  fo  far  as  to  be  able  to  converfe  freely  ;  and  have 
fuch  Opportunity,  and  fpecial  Occafions  to  declare  ibeScnti- 
'  S  f  meiit? 


212  Refledions  and  Obfefvations 

ments  he  had  in  thefe,  which  were,  to  human  Apprehenfion, 
his  -3)  ing  Circumftances  ;  and  to  bear  his  Teftimony  concern- 
ing the  Nature  of  true  Religion,  and  concerning  the  mifchie- 
vous  Tendency  of  it*s  moit  prevalent  Counterfeits  and  falfe 
Appearances  ;  as  Things  he  had  a  fpecial, clear,  diftindView 
of  at  thst  Time,  when  he  expelled  in  a  few  Minutes  to  be 
in  Eternity  ;  and  the  Certainty  &  Importance  of  which  were 
then,  in  a  peculiar  Manner,  imprefs'd  on  his  Mind« 

Among  the  happy  Confequences  of  his  going  to  BoJion^wetQ 
thofe  Hberal  Benefadions  that  have  been  mention'd,  which 
were  made  by  pious  difpofed  Pcrfons,  for  the  maintaining  and 
promoting  the  Intereft  of  Religion  among  his  People  :  And 
alfo  the  meeting  of  a  Number  of  Gentlemen  in  Bo/fon,  of  Note 
and  Ability,  to  confult  upon  Meafures  for  that  Purpofe  ;  who 
were  excited  by  their  Acquaintance  and  Converfation  with 
Mt,Brawerd,  ^n6  by  the  Account  of  the  greatThings  God  had 
wrought  by  his  Miniftry,  to  unite  themfelves,  that  by  their 
joint  Endeavours  and  Contributions  they  might  promote  the 
Kingdom  of  Chrift,  and  the  fpiritual  Good  of  their  Fellow- 
Creatures,  among  the  Indians  in  New-Jer/ejfyTLnd  elfewhere. 

It  was  alfo  remarkable,  that  Mr.  Brainerd  fhould  go  fo 
Bcficn,  at  ihst  Time  ;  after  the  hanourable  Commiffioncrs 
there,  of  the  Corporation  ia  Ltndon  for  propagating  thcGofpel 
in  New- England  and  Parts  adjacent,  had  received  Dr.  IVil- 
liam's'Lig^cy  for  (he  maintaining  of  two  Miifionaries  among 
the  Heathen  ;  and  at  a  Time  when  they  having  concluded  on 
a  MifBon  to  the  Indians  of  the  Six-Nations  (fo  called  )  were 
lookii:g  out  for  fit  Perfons  to  be  imployed  in  that  Important 
Service.  This  proved  an  Occalion  of  their  committing  to  him 
the  AfFaii  of  finding  and  recommending  fuirable  Perlons : 
Which  has  proved  .a  fuocefful  Means  of  two  Perfons  being 
fjund  and  actually  appointed  to  that  Bufinefs  ;  who  feem  to 
be  well  qualified  for  lU  and  to  have  theirHearts  greatly  engaged 
in  it :  One  of  which  nes  been  folemnly  ordain'd  to  that  Work 
in  fiojion^  and  is  now  gone  forth  to  one  of  thofe  Tribes,  who 
have  appeared  well-difpofed  to  hisReception  :  It  beingjudged 
not  convenient  for  the  other  to  go  'till  the  next  Spring,  by 
Rcafon  of  his  bodily  Infirmity.  *  Thefe- 


*  The  Appomanent  of  ihefe  Gentlemen  to  this  Miffion 
has  been  blthirto  much  fmiled  on  ia  Providence  j  as  in 
Other  Re]pci5isf,_fopHrticuiaiIy  in  the  wonderful  opening 

of 


On  the  preceeding  Memoirs.  3 1  ^ 

-Thefe  happy  Confequences  of  Mr.  ^r/2/«^r^'s  Journey  to 
^opn  would  have  been  prevented,  in  Cafe  he  had  died, when 
he  was  brought  fo  near  to  Death  in  jSJewJerfey.  Or  if  after 
he  c  »m-  firft  to  Northampton  (  vvherd  ha  was  much  at  a  Lofs 
and  long  dehberating  which  Way  to  bend  his  Courfe  )  he  had 
determined  not  to  go  to  Bo/im. 

The  Providence  of  God   was   obfervable   in  hi^  going  to 
Sojion  at  aTimc  when  not  only  the  honourableComnjifiioncrs 
wfere  feeking  Mi^onaries  to  the  Six  Nations  ;    but  jult  after 
his  Journal^  which  gives  an  Account  of  his  Labours  and  Suc- 
cefs among  the  Jadiam^had  been  received  and  fpread  in^o/hn  .- 
Whereby    his  Name  was  known,  and  the  Minds  of  lerirjus 
People  were  well  prepared   to   receive  his^Peifon,  and    the 
Teftimony  he  there  gave  for  God  ;   to  exert  themTelves    for 
the  upholding   and   promoting  the  Intereft  of  Religion  in  his 
Congregation,    and   amon^fl   the /«^/^»j  elfewhcre  j  and   to 
regard  his  Judgment  concerning  the  Q^iaiifications  of  Mi{riC' 
naries,  ^c,  U  he  had  gone  there  the  Fall  before  (when  he  had 
intended  to  have  made  his   jo-^rney  into   New-Englayid,   but 
was  prevented  hy  afudden  greatlncreafe  of  his  Jilnefs)  it  would 
not  have  been  likely  to  liave  been   in  any  Meafurc  to  To  good 
EiFe6l :   And  aifo  if  he  had  not  been  unexpecSledly  detained  in 
Bo/ion  ;    For  when   he  v/cnt  from  my  Houfe,  jhe  intended  to 
make  but  a  very  fhort  Stay  there  ;  But  divine  Providence  by 
his  being  brought  fo  low  there,   detain'd  him  long  ;  theicby 
to  make  Way  for  the  fulfilling  it's  own  gracious  Ddigns. 

The  Providence  of  God  was  remarkable  in  fo  ordering,  tiiat 
altho'  he  was  brought  To  very  near  thcGrave  \v\Bcfion^  that  it 
was  not  in  the  leafl  expected  he  would  ever  come  alive  out 
of  his  Chamber  ;  yet  he  wonderfuily  revived,  and  was  prc- 
ferved  feveral  Months  longer :  So  that  he  had  Opportunity  to 
fee, and  fully  to  converfe  with  both  h\syoun<i,dx Brethren  before  ^ 

he  died  ;  which  wasaThing  he  greatly  delircd  ;   and  cfpccially  ^ 

to  fee  his  Brother  John,\v\ih  whom  wa^left  theCarc  of  hisCon" 
gregation  -,  that  he  might  by  him  be  fully  informed   of  their 


of  the  Hearts  of  many  to  contribute  libcr;»lly  to  fo  excel- 
lent aDefign  ;  bcfides  the  B^nefadions  in  /;ry?o«,aNumbcr 
of  Perfons  at  Norihompton  with  much  Chcarfulncfs  have 
given  about  jT.  i6o  fold  1  enor  )  ;  and  a  particular  Pcr- 
fon  in  Spritipficla  has  devoted  a  conficlerablc  Part  of    Ms 

Eflare  to  this  inter efh 

S  f  2  State 


^T^  Rcfleftions  and  Obfcr^tions 

State,  and  might  leave  with  him  fuch  Inftruflions  and  Direc- 
tions as  were  requifite  in  order  to  their  fpiritual  Welfare, 
and  to  fend  to  them  his  dying  Charges  and  Counfels.  And 
he  had  alfo  Opportunity,  by  Means  of  this  Sufpenfion  of  hit 
Death,  to  find  and  recommend  a  Couple  of  Perfons  fit  to  be 
employed  as  Mijianaries  to  the  5/>  Nations^  as  had  been  dcfircd 
of  him. 

Thus,  altho'  it  was  the  Pleafureofa  fove reign  God,  that 
he  fhould  be  taken  away  from  his  Congregation,  the  People 
that  he  had  begotten  through  the  Gofpel,  who   were  fo  dear 
to  him  ;  yet  it  was  granted  to  him,   that  before  he  died  he 
Ihould  fee  them  well  provided  for^  every  Way  :  He  faw  them 
provided  for  with  One  to  inftrud  them,and  take  Care  of  their 
Souls  ;  his  own  Brother,  whom  he  could  confide  in  :  He  faw 
a  good  Foundation  laid   for  the  Support  of  the  School  among 
them  ;  tbofe  Things  that  before  were  wanting  in  order  to  it, 
b:;ng  fupplicd  :  And  he  had  the  Profpedl  of  a  charitable  Society 
being  eftabliflicd,  of  able  and  well-difpofed  Persons,  who  feem 
to  make  the  fpiritual  Intereft  of  his  Congregation  their  own  ; 
whereby  he  had  a  comfortable   View  of  their  being  well-pro- 
vided for,  for  the  future  :    And  he  had  alfo  Opportunity  to 
leave  all  his  dying  Charges  with  his  SuccefTor  in  the  Paftoral 
Care  of  his  People,  and  by  him  to  fend   his  dying  Counfels  to 
them.  Thus  God  granted  him  to  fee  all  Things  happily  fettled, 
or  in  a  hopeful  Way  of  being  fo^  before  his  Death,    with  Re- 
fpe^l  to  his  dear  People  —  And  whereas  not  oiily  his  ownCon- 
grcgation,  but  the  Souls  of  the  Indiam  in  North- America  in 
general,  were   very   dear  to  him,  and   he  had  greatly  fet  his 
Heart  on    the   propagating  and   extending  the  Kingdom  of 
Ch:ifi  among  'em  ;  God  was  pleafcd  to  grant  to  him  (however 
it  w;is  his  Will,  that  he  fhould  be  taken  away,  and  fo  fhould 
not  be  the  immediate  Ir.f^rument  of  their  Infiru6lion  andCon- 
yerfion,  yet  )  that  before  his  Death,  he  fhould  fee  unexpedled 
rxiraordin^ry  Provilion  made  for  this  alfo.   And  'tis  remarka- 
ble, that  God  not  only  allowed  him  to  fee  fuch  Provifion  made 
for  the  maintaining  the  Interefi  of  Religion   among   his    own 
People, and  ♦hePropagation  of  it  elfewhere  ;   but  honoured  him 
by  making  him  theMeans  or  Occ  fion  oi  it.    So  that  it  is  very 
probable,  however  Mr.  Brainerd^  during  the  lafl  four  Months 
of  his  Li/e,  was  ordinarily  in  an  extremely  weak  and  lowState^ 
very  often  f^drcttly  able  to  fpeak  ;  yet   that  he  was  made  the 
if«ihument  oi-  Means  of  much  m.ore  Good  ia    that  Space  of 

Timc^ 


On  the  f  receding  Memoirs.  ^  i  - 

Time,  than  he  would  have  been  if  he  had  been  well,  and   m 
full  Strength  of  Body.     Thus  God^i  Power  was  manifeftcd  ia 
J)is  fVeaknefsyZnd  iheLt/e  of  ChriJI  was  ntanifefted  in  his  mortal 
Flejh. 

Another  Thing,  wherein  appears  the  merciful  Difpofal  of 
Providence  with  Refpedt  to  his  Death,  was,  that  he  did  not 
die  in  the  Wildernefs, among  KhQ^z^TLgts^^iKaunaumtekyOx  the 
Forks  of  Delaware^  or  at  Sufquahannah-y  but  In  a  Place  where 
his  dying  Behaviour  and  Speeches  might  be  obferved  and  rc- 
membred,  and  fome  Account  given  of  them  for  the  Benefit  of 
Survivors ;  and  alfo  where.  Care  might  be  taken  of  him  in  his 
Sicknefs,  and  proper  Honours  done  htm  at  his  Death. 

The  Providence  of  God  is  alfo  worthy  of  Remark,  in  fo 
over-ruling  and  ordering  the  Matter,  that  he  did  not  finally 
leave  abfolute  Orders  for  the  intire  fuppreffing  of  his  private 
Papers ;  as  he  had  intended  and  fully  refolved,  infomuch  that 
all  thelmportunity  of  hisFriends  could  fcarce  reftrain  him  from 
doing  it,  when  fick  at  Sofion*  And  one  Thing  relating  to 
this  is  peculiarly  remarkable,  v/z.  that  his  Brother,  a  little 
>before  his  Death,' fliould  come  from  the  J^r/^yj  unexpeded, 
and  bring  hhDiary  to  him,tho*  he  had  received  nofuchOrder. 
So  that  he  had  Opportunity  of  Accefs  to  thefe  his  refcrvcd  Pa« 
pers,  and  for  reviewing  the  fame  ;  without  which,  it  appears, 
he  would  at  laft  have  ordered  them  to  be  wholly  fupprefs*d  : 
But  after  this,  he  the  more  readily  yielded  to  the  Defires  of 
his  PViends,  and  was  willing  to  leave  them  in  their  Hands  to 
be  difpofed  of  as  they  thought  might  be  moft  for  God's  Glory  : 
By  which  Means,  he  being  dead,  yet  fpeaketh,  in  thcfeMcmoirs 
of  h.s  Life,  taken  from  thofe  private  Writings  :  Whereby  it 
is  to  be  hoped  he  may  ftill  be  as  it  were  the  Inftrument  of 
much  promoting  thclntereft  of  Religion  in  this  World  ;  the 
Advancement  of  which  he  (o  much  dcfired,  and  hoped  would 
be  accomplifh'd  after  his  Death. 

If  thefc  Cir.cumftances  of  Mr.  ^ramerd's  Death  be  duly 
confidered,  I  doubt  not  but  they  will  be  acknowledged  as  a 
notable  Inftance.of  God's  Fatherly  Care,  andCovenant  F-iiih- 
fulnefs  towards  them  that  are  devoted  to  him,  and  faithruliy 
Terve  him  while  they  live  ;  whereby  he  never  fails  nor  forfakis 
them,  but  is  with  them  living  and  dyini^  ;  fo  that  whether  the; 
live,  they  live  to  the  LORD  ;  or  whether  they  die,they  die  to  the 
Lord  ;  and  both  in  Life  andDeath  they  are  own'd  and  taken 
Cafe  oi  as  /^j..-'Mr.^rjTnr;ihimrclf  as  was  before  obferved, 

Wii 


3i6 


Reflc6lioi«  and  Obfervations  (^c. 


was  much  in  taking  >foticc  (  when  near  his  End  )  of  th£  mer- 
ciful Circumftances  of  his  Death ;  and  faid,  fpom  Time  to 
Time,  that  God  had  granted  him  all  his  Defire. 

And  1  would  not  conclude  myObfervations  on  the  merciful 
Circumftances  of  Mr.  Brainerd?^  Death  without  acknowledg- 
ing withThankfulnefs,  the  graciousDifpenfation  of  Pfovidence 
to  me  and  my  Family,  in  fo  ordering,  that  he  ( tho'  the  ordi- 
nary Place  of  his  Abode  was  more  than  200  Miles  diftant  ) 
(hould  be  caft  hither,  to  my  Houfe,  in  his  laft  Sicknefs,  and 
{hould  die  here :  So  that  we  had  Opportunity  for  much  Ac- 
quaintance and  Converfation  with  him,  and  to  fhew  himKind- 
nefs  in  fuch  Circumftances,  and  to  fee  his  dying  Behaviour, 
to  hear  his  dying  Speeches,  to  receive  his  dying  Counfels, 
and  to  have  the  Benefit  of  his  dyingPrayers.  May  God  in  in- 
finite Mercy  grant,  that  we  may  ever  retain  a  properRemem- 
brance  of  thefe  Things,  and  make  a  due  Improvement  of  the 
Advantages  we  have  had,  in  thefe  Refpeds  I  The  Lord  grant 
alfo,  that  the  foregoing  Account  of  Mr.  Brainerd\  Life  and 
Death  may  be  for  the  great  fpiritual  Benefit  of  all  that  fhall 
icad  it,  and  prove  a  happy  Means  of  promoting  the  Revival  of 
true  Religion  in  thefe  Parts  of  the  World.     Amen. 


5f     U     ^     3     :S>. 


w. 

-^^\- 


ciscl 


^B^ 


E  RRAT  A.     Pag.  57.  1.   24.  r.  rcfitfliU     Pjg.  219' 
Marg.  Not:  f  in."i)'t.  r  Davs  before. 


^mm^ 


BOOKS  printed  for  and  fo^d  by  D.  Henchman  at 
his  Shop  over  againji  the  Old  Brick  Meeting- HoU/^ 
in  CornhilL  Jf     ^ 

V • 

^Toddard*i  Safety  of  appearing  in  thcRighteoufnefs  of  Chrift. 
^  —  His  Guide  to  Chrift. 

Shepard's  Sincere  Convert. 
-—  Sound  Believer. 

Appleton's  Wifdom  of  GOD  in  thsRedcmption  of  fallenMan, 
—  Difcourfes  from  Rom,  viii.  14.  Setting  forth  the  cicareft 
and  fureft  Marks  cf  our  being  fo  led  by  the  Spirit  of  God 
as  to  demonftrate  that  wc  axe  the  Children  of  God. 

Pemberion's  Pradlcal  Difcourfes,  I.  The  Dignity  &  Glory 
of  Man's  Primitive  State.  11.  The  Nature  aiij  Neceflity  of 
Converfion,  IJI.  The  Rcafcnahienefs  of  ftriving  to  obtain  Sal- 
vation.    iV.  The  iVIethod  of  Divine  Grace  in  Converfion. 

V.  The  Nature  and  Obligation  of  Receiving  Chrift  by  Faith. 

VI.  The  Duty   of   imitating  the    Example    of   Christ. 

VII.  The  Folly  of  iofing  the  Soul  fox  the  Gain  oith^fVorld, 

Dr.  Watt'^  Guide  to  Prayer. 

An  Account  of  the  Life  and  Death  of  Mrs.  Elizabith 
Bury, 

The  Marrow  oF  Modern  Divinity.  Touching  the  Cove- 
nant of  Works,  and  the  Covenant  of  Grace.  In  a  Dia- 
logue between  a  Miniller  of  the  Gorpel--a  Legaliit  —  an 
Antinomian  —  and  a  young  Chriftian. 

Dr.  Colman's  Difcourfes  on  the  Incomprehenfiblenefs  of 
GOD. 

Spiritual  Songs— Or  Songs  of  Praifc,  with  Penitential 
Cries  to  Almigkty  GOD  upon  fcvcral  Occafisnj.  Together 
v/ith  the  Song  of  Songs  which  is  Solomons. 

Ho9ker*s  Doubting   Chrijiian  drawa  to.  Christ. 

Uri^^'i  Nature  an4  Ncce.Tity  of  the  New-Bif(h. 

Edwardi  's 


.    BOOKS  Sold  hy  D.  Henchman. 

« 

Edwards's  Humble  Attempt  to  promote  explicit  Agrey 
ment  and  vifible  Union  of  God's  People  in  extraordina^" 
Prayer  for  the  Revival  of  Religion  &c. 

Holmei's  Good  Governmei;t  of  Chriftian  Families  recom- 
mended.    With  a  Difcourfe  of  fecret  Prayer. 

Wright's  Treatife  of  beirg  born  again,  without  which 
no  Man  can  be  faved. 

jilltine's  Alarm  to  the  Unconverted. 

Fox  on  Time  and  the  End  of  Time. 

Huffil's  ^tytn  Sermons. 

Udeedy  {Jo/huo)  Praaical  Difcourfe  concerning  the  Bene- 
iit  of  Communion  with  GOD  in  his  Houfe. 

Mather's  Apology  for  the  Liberty  of  the  Churches  in 
New-England*  To  which  is  prefixed  a  Difcourfe  concerning 
Congregational  Churches. 

Barnard's  Sermons  on  feveral  Subjects,  viz*  A  Confirma- 
tion of  the  Truth  of  the  Chriftian  Religion.  Compel  them 
to  come  in.  The  Chriftian  Hero,  or  the  Saints  Vi^ory  and 
Reward. 

Jfilliams  (Solomon)  Christ  the  King  and  Witnefs  of 
Truth,  and  the  Nature  Excellency  and  Extent  of  his 
Kingdom  as  founded  in  Truth  and  only  promoted  by  it* 

Some  Remarkable  PafTages  in  the  Life  of  the  Hon>  Col. 
James  Gardner,  who  was  ShmditPrtj^on-Fans,  With 
a  Sermon  by  P.  Dodridge,  D.  D, 

Meditations  on  feveraj  divine  Subjeds.  I.  The  Humanity 
pf  Christ.  JI.  The  Extcnfivenefs  of  God's  good  Dcfign 
In  felling  Jo/eph  into  Egypt.  III.  Christ  the  King  fitting 
at  his  Table.  IV.  Of  the  Love  of  Christ  and  faving 
Knowledge  of  it.     With  a  Letter  to  a  Friend. 


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